Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!

"Hey Sirzechs."

"... Please explain this from start to finish again, your letter did not do enough credit... also... I have questions about why you didn't tell us God was dead before now." Sirzechs had his hand on his forehead, since he had no clue that Naruto was aware of a secret that everyone who was in the highest powers had been keeping under wraps. For years now he had been making sure nobody ever learned the truth behind that little... no, that very big issue, and he had no clue that Naruto was fully aware.

Though, Naruto HAD been on Earth as a statue when that battle happened, and he had been in Sage Mode sensing everything around the continent when it went down. It wasn't impossible for him to have known, and just not thought anything of it.

"Okay, I was planning a prank on your sister when I found a dead guy."

"Okay."

"Well, these two girls attacked me thinking that I killed the dead guy."

"Makes sense for them to do that."

"Then, I beat them up and we talked, I agreed to help them get their holy swords back and kill a guy conspiring to bring about a supernatural world war."

"As you would." Sirzechs agreed that was something Naruto would do, no doubt not liking the idea of a war between the races for purely racial reasons. So far he was following the story that Naruto was telling him, but he was having trouble believing the fact that it all went down in less than 6 hours, the story he was telling them. Even less than 6 hours if the story itself was to be believed. "Continue."

"So I found the guy, spied on him for awhile, then stabbed Kokabiel in the back of the head with a convenience store knife I sto... borrowed."

"Stole, but okay."

"So I returned the swords to these girls, accidentally revealed God was temporarily dead-"

"Temporarily?" Xenovia and Sirzechs asked with their eyes widening at THAT revelation. Naruto raised an eyebrow at their surprise.

"Temporary... full circle... all these modern day gods are just reincarnations of the gods that were around during my time period... you do realize we have Christmas during my era as well... right... when humanity went extinct during my era, the gods went extinct too... then dinosaurs... then the gods reincarnated without their memories." Naruto reminded them that all of this had happened before.

Sirzechs blinked.

"Christmas existed in your era?"

[True: Somehow, Christianity and Christmas did exist during Naruto's time, as did many other religions]

"Yeah, let me tell you... did you know that Santa isn't real, it's just ninjas being sent on missions to sneak into homes and leave presents?" Naruto asked them, since he hated when he learned that truth. When his sensei had alerted him to the true workings of one of the holidays he cherished a lot growing up, though he never got any presents. "Though, some gods haven't been revived yet. Jashin hasn't been revived thankfully... the cultists that worshipped him were the worst." Naruto waved his hand at that.

He only ever met the one cultist though.

"... So God... is going to revive... eventually?" Xenovia grabbed Naruto's shoulders as he spoke to her and Sirzechs. It was shocking news to say the least, even more shocking that Naruto apparently knew all of this and had no told anyone.

"Eventually."

"... Why didn't you tell us this?" Sirzechs needed to ask THAT question, he needed it answered more than anything else. He didn't care that a warmonger was killed, since nobody of importance knew of the fact Kokabiel was dead they could just pretend it never happened. He really wanted to know why Naruto didn't tell them all of this.

Naruto just tilted his head in confusion.

"I mean... nobody asked me? All of you have just been testing me and forcing me through therapy, it's not like you asked me any questions about gods... I've even told you how everything is a cycle. I didn't think it was worth mentioning." Naruto had no clue what it was important information to share with any of them in the first place.

In HIS Era all the same religions existed, actually there were even LESS religions that existed in this era than that existed in his. That was just because not all of the gods had revived back to their old selves as of yet. Naruto was a believer in gods, but he also knew that gods could be killed, so he saw no importance in their existence simply because of the fact that they had been killed before.

Sirzechs put his face in his hands.

Naruto was right.

"... I forgot... you literally lived through all of human history... you know everything that has ever happened in the countries that your statue was located in... I keep forgetting that just because you forgot your own past, doesn't mean you forgot about what happened during the last 1000s of years." Sirzechs just looked at Naruto as a 16 year old boy that was unfortunate enough to be stuck in stone form, and was forced to endure something that no other person was easily capable of enduring.

He both underestimated Naruto, and completely disregarded the fact that Naruto was THE most important source of history that had ever existed. Naruto knew secrets about history, the secret history of the world, that nobody else had at their disposal. Naruto didn't know the names of human figures in history, but he knew the secrets of the gods that had revived, lived, and thrived. He knew about the paths that humans travelled and the ways they lived their lives.

"So... wait... so... how long until he revives?" Xenovia needed to know that answer.

Naruto tilted his head the other direction.

"I saw... anywhere between 5 years... or 7... or 8 billion years. I don't know, usually the gods grow weaker and die once humans are gone... or just poof instantly. I've never sensed a god that has died while humanity was still around." Naruto didn't have all the answers. He could just tell them what was going on during the time he did experience. "Still, you've been kicked from the church, so not like this changes your path in life." Naruto stated to her with a raised eyebrow. She was going to be dead and in Hell LONG before God was revived, since there was no way that she would be allowed into Heaven while knowing the truth.

Xenovia sighed and nodded.

"You are right."

"Naruto are there any OTHER secrets you know, that you should tell us about?" Sirzechs asked as he grabbed onto Naruto's shoulders.

"... Define secret."

"Something that most people don't know."

"Define secret." Naruto repeated, since he did NOT know what knowledge he had that could be considered a secret. He remembered a lot of things that happened in the last couple of thousand years that might be secrets, or they might be common knowledge. "I don't know what you would call a secret."

"Are the Satans really dead?"

"Yes."

"Will they revive?"

"No, because God killed them when he was weakened."

"So you're saying if I don't ask you these secrets directly, then you aren't going to be able to tell me the truth or not... purely because you don't know what we would consider secrets?" Sirzechs asked with a tone that suggested he didn't know where to begin with everything. Now he was starting to question everything that he knew to be true. "... God was weakened?" Sirzechs asked with his eyes widened in shock.

"Yes."

"... Why was he weakened?"

"He had been fighting something too powerful for him to kill, so it was sealed away."

"Do you know what it was?"

"... Kind of? I don't know what it was called, but it was about the same level of strength as the shapeshifting human shaped dragon that roams around, and the delinquent dragon that does tricks in the sky."

"What!?" Sirzechs didn't even KNOW what to make of THAT statement, or how Naruto casually revealed it to them. Sirzechs started to pace back and forth, while Xenovia just looked at Naruto with sheer confusion, since what he said made no sense to her. She just watched as Sirzechs slammed his head into the wall a few times, just to get something out of his system.

There was a long silence.

A LONG silence.

"Naruto... please be honest with me... about how strong is this thing... use chakra and magic levels for comparison... if it were to awaken, could I defeat it?" Sirzechs was scared of such a being causing untold destruction.

Naruto thought about it.

"... You have no chance, the magic that thing gave off was about equal to my chakra reserves after I lost Kurama. Kurama could easily turn this world to ash if he wanted to, and that was with half his chakra... that beast was about as strong as my chakra is now. Of course, that is going purely off of magic." Naruto had to admit that he didn't remember what the abilities the beast thing had were. Going purely off of magic and chakra levels though, Sirzechs had no chance of winning in the slightest.

Sirzechs nodded.

"... Wait... you have chakra levels equal to... what?"

"I mean, I do, but I can't exactly unleash those levels of force during battle where people can get hurt. So, kind of restricted in using only moderate levels of attacks... the most I'm willing to destroy are a couple of mountain ranges. Anything more than that, and I risk hurting people that I didn't want to hurt." Naruto wasn't willing to do any attack large enough that people could risk getting hurt by. His own chakra reserves were equal to Kurama's reserves, though Kurama's chakra was a LOT more dense and potent than his own in turms of potency. "Still, unless somebody unseals it, it has no chance of getting free, and I'm pretty sure I'm the only person who remembers where it is." Naruto remembered where the beast was sealed.

He was sure that if Sirzechs didn't know about this, then there was no way that anyone else easily knew about this.

"So... this... beast is equal in power to Ophis and Great Red?"

"I don't know who those are."

"The shapeshifting dragon and the deliquent dragon that does tricks in the sky." Sirzechs sweat dropped when he realized that Naruto could tell him that he knew those dragons existed, but at the same time didn't even know their names. Naruto's knowledge was both extremely useful and extremely useless since everything he knew was from the point of view of a person that could only view things from an outside perspective, without hearing words or names.

Naruto nodded with a surprised look.

"Okay, so THAT is what they are called... I would love to meet them at some point. Maybe they can tell me where the Tailed Beasts are sealed away at." Naruto had not forgotten his desire to free the other Tailed Beasts. He didn't know where the statue containing them was at though, so he had no method of even securing their locations unless he asked some powerful beings that had been alive for a long time.

"... If that... monster ever DOES get unsealed... can I ask you to team up with Ophis and Great Red to help defeat it?" Sirzechs hated to ask Naruto this question.

Naruto blinked.

"I don't have a problem with that, sure, but they would have to agree."

"Oh thanks... that takes a load off my mind. By the way, why did you say that I might be able to beat that beast?"

"I mean, just having more magic than you doesn't make it stronger. You might be physically stronger, or way smarter in battle. Chakra and magic levels don't really matter... Sairaorg is super strong, but he barely has any magic in him at all." Naruto made an honest comparison. Sairaorg was very physically powerful, stronger than Sirzechs was when it came to hand to hand.

Magic power was not the only factor that went into battle, there were a lot of other factors. Did you have techniques that could be used super fast, that were super deadly? Did you have the skill to cut your opponents head off, before they could react*? There were so many ways to kill opponents, that a little thing like chakra and magic reserves didn't matter too much in Naruto's mind.

He had met many people during his era with pathetic chakra reserves, that could kick the asses of people with 100 times their levels of chakra.

"Good point... okay... is there ANYTHING else you feel might be important information?" Sirzechs grabbed onto Naruto's shoulders again.

... Right, Naruto didn't know what was secret and what was common knowledge.

"Naruto... is Lilith still alive?"

"Who is Lilith?"

"The mother of demons, she is out ancestor and the wife to the original Lucifer." Sirzechs didn't know what happened to that woman.

Naruto just tilted her head.

"You do realize I don't know the names of demons right? I've sensed a lot of female beings from other species." Naruto didn't know the answer to that. Rather, he MIGHT know the answer, but he had no way to remember which devil in his memory was which. It was easy to pick apart the great leaders from the common folk, and the gods from the warriors, but picking apart one person from the next would be a challenge.

Sirzechs nodded and sighed.

"Tell me if you do remember."

"Sure thing, and I'm happy to answer any questions you do have... so can you get Xenovia enrolled into Kuoh with me?" Naruto asked as he gestured to Xenovia.

"Consider it done... I've... I've got a lot of headaches to look forward to."

Sirzechs could see it now.

The other Devil Kings were NOT going to take this news well, but he did learn something that he had not thought about during this exchange.

Naruto's value was far greater to them than he had originally thought it to be, and as much as Ajuka would like to deny it, Sirzechs could see it now.

Naruto would be the one who destroyed them all, or saved them all.

Chapter End!
Please Leave Me Lots of Nice Long Reviews, But No Flames Please!

*1 - Christmas DOES Exist in the Naruto-verse, and many of our world religions do exist there, which just makes the cycle of history repeating itself even funnier from Naruto's point of view, since he has literally seen all of these gods DIE and REVIVE before.
*2 - Kurama has been stated by Databooks and FEATS from the Manga to be capable of destroying planets at less than 50% of his power, which is far greater than Ophis or Great Redare capable of, and Naruto has chakra (at Age 16) equal to half of Kurama's chakra.
*3 - Spoiler: Great Red doesn't get killed by a huge magic attack, he gets killed by having his head cut off, so he isn't as strong as DxD fans seem to think. Having more magic doesn't make you immune to attacks than can instantly kill you, since most Instant Death DxD attacks RELY on your opponent having less magical power than you... so they aren't true instant death attacks.