Eren just couldn't wrap his head around what he'd seen. It was only early afternoon and he was holding a beer, his third. Armin was studying and Jean was napping. Eren, on the other hand, was clicking idly through Netflix and drinking. Drinking and thinking.
Levi had a fucking kid? How old had the kid been? Eren was no good at guessing children's ages. Eight, maybe? Shit, when had Levi fathered her? Eren took another swig of his beer and clicked off the TV, irritated.
Maybe the child wasn't Levi's natural kid. Maybe it was a cousin or something. Maybe he was babysitting or some shit. Of course, if it was his natural kid then that meant there was a significant other, most likely a woman. But then why had he been standing in the Dollar General on Valentine's day reading cards? Maybe they had broken up or … oh, fuck, maybe she had died.
If there was a partner then maybe that was why Levi turned him down when he'd asked him out.
Eren drained his beer. He had to know. He had to have a plan.
Jean's room door opened and the man himself emerged and stumped down the hall to the bathroom. Eren heard a flush and the sink running, then Jean appeared in the living room.
"You OK, Dude?"
Jean stumbled to a halt and stared owlishly at him. He seemed to wake up a bit. "Yeah, I'm just getting a glass of water." He yawned hugely and crossed to the kitchen.
Eren gulped at his beer.
Jean rummaged in the fridge and returned, glass of orange juice in his hand instead. He looked fully awake. He paused by the couch. "Say, Eren?"
Eren leaned his head backward and looked at him upside down. "Yup?"
Jean ran a hand through his sandy hair. "We don't … uh … see each other much anymore. We should go hang out."
Eren's brow knit. "We see each other every day."
"Yeah, I know, but we should go out. Together. Just the two of us."
Eren began to feel uncomfortable. Was Jean asking him out? Like, on a date?
"Jean …"
"Look, Dude, I know we've been casual all this time but I'd like to … for us to … y'know, get closer."
Eren sat up on the couch. He swiveled to face Jean. "We're both bottoms."
Jean blushed and rocked from foot to foot not looking at him. "I'd let you top me …"
"Goddamn it Jean!" Eren stood, hands balled into fists at his side. "Why are you doing this? Is it because of Marco? You broke up with him! You took that good, kind guy and tossed him aside and now you say you wanna fuck me?!"
"Eren …"
"You know I have a guy I'm going for!"
"He's not good enough for you!"
"You don't even know him!"
"I don't need to! C'mon Eren. Give us a chance! We have history!"
"Fuck, Jean!" Eren strode to the door and struggled into his coat, toeing at his shoes with his stockinged feet. "I really like this guy!"
He jerked open the door, went through, and slammed it behind himself.
"Shit!" Jean said.
Eren was walking blindly, eyes focussed on the sidewalk. He had no idea where he was heading. The grey sky seemed to press down on him and a thin drizzle, quickly turning to snow, began. He kept walking.
Eventually he passed the flower shop and realized that he was walking down Sina street. He was heading for Levi's.
What would he do when he got there? Just hover around outside in the snow and watch the house, like a creep? Should he knock on the door? What if Levi's girlfriend/wife/boyfriend was there? That made Eren angry; the thought of Levi having a significant other. What if he did? What would he do?
Eren had gotten to the part of the street where Levi's duplex was and the other side of the street opened up onto the cemetery. He walked about ten feet then stumbled to a halt, staring. There was a man in the cemetery, almost directly across from Levi's duplex, standing at the foot of a grave. Eren recognized him immediately. It was Levi.
Eren hesitated then stepped onto the grass. He felt like an absolute ass but he couldn't help but drift toward the man. He got close—not too close, a respectful distance—and stared silently at the grave, reading the tombstone.
Kuchel Ackerman. Beloved mother.
Eren fidgeted. Levi knew he was there but didn't acknowledge him.
Eren's gloved hands were cold and he shoved them deeper into his pockets, hoping for warmth. He noticed that Levi didn't wear gloves. He also noticed that Levi was shivering.
"Your wife?" Eren asked, finally.
For several long moments, Eren was sure Levi wouldn't answer at all. Fat, lazy snowflakes began to fall from the steely sky, drifting down, so innocently beautiful, to stick and stay on the frozen ground, and in Levi's hair.
"My mother," Levi said quietly.
"Jesus, Levi, I'm so sorry." Eren could not fathom losing his mother.
Levi didn't move, just stood and stared at the plain, pale grey, granite tombstone.
Finally, he seemed to awake from his stupor, turned away, and began walking over the brittle grass toward the sidewalk. Eren trailed uncertainly after.
When Levi got to the walk he inspected his shoes and grimaced at the wet and the tiny bits of grass stuck to them.
"Tch."
Eren stepped onto the walk and Levi looked across the street at his house. "Did you want something, Eren?"
Yes, for you to go out with me. For you to give me a chance.
"N-no. I was just out walking and I … uh … saw you. I'm sorry for your loss."
Levi nodded, looked both ways, and crossed the street.
Eren gazed forlornly after him.
When Levi reached his house, before he could touch the knob, the door swung open and a woman stood there, the little black-haired girl on her hip. Eren, across the street, gaped.
She was tall, easily three or four inches taller than Levi, slim and fit with square glasses and heaps of reddish-brown hair swept up into a messy ponytail on the back of her head. They exchanged a few words and Levi went past her into the house. As he did, the woman looked across the street and right at Eren. They locked gazes for a brief moment then Eren quickly ducked his head and walked back the way he'd come. The snow twisted down like fireflies.
The woman watched as the tall, brown-haired guy hurried down the sidewalk, nascent snow swirling around him, then they shut the door.
"Levi, who was that young man across the street? Do you know him?"
Levi, who was making tea, grunted.
"C'mon, Grumpy, spill. Is he a friend of yours? He's cute!"
"Give it a rest, Hange."
Levi's low, disgruntled voice did absolutely nothing to deter Hange. They came and slouched, one hip against the counter, entirely too close.
"Tellllll meeeee!"
Levi put his open hand over their face and gently pushed them away. "Back off you disgusting thing. I don't want your cooties in my tea."
"C'mon, Leeeeeviiiii!"
"Ugh, fine, his name is Eren Yeager and he's in my Child Development class."
"He's really good-looking. Do you know if he's gay or bi?"
Levi took his teapot and cup to the table. "Quit trying to set me up, Hans."
"But, Levi, you need somebody, Sweetie. I hate that you're all alone."
"I'm not alone. I have 'Kasa."
The little girl, busy coloring at the table looked up at her name and smiled her small enigmatic smile.
"That's not the same thing," Hange insisted.
Levi poured his tea and, holding it in his peculiar way, by the rim, he brought the cup to his mouth and sipped at the piping hot liquid. "It'll have to do. You know my crappy track record. They always leave."
"Oh, Levi … "
The steam from the tea swirled upward, matching his eyes. "I don't want my heart broken again. Face it, I'm just not built for love."