You Want Me to What Now?
Disclaimer: I do not own anything. The idea of it belongs to 'esama' from ao3 in her excellent story 'Wait, What?'. You should read her works. She's fantastic.
AN: In which Lily is a protective lioness.
"Can you please repeat that, headmaster," Lily Evans-Potter said slowly to a smiling Albus Dumbledore. "For I must have misheard you."
"My dear girl," said the headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot and a bunch of other titles. "You must understand that the Prophecy is of utmost..."
"From the beginning, if you please," interrupted Lily. "And don't you even dare to shift past me to look at Harry and Charlie." As the old man looked like a boy with his hands caught in the cookie jar, she smiled like she was a hungry lioness looking for food. "How about you tell me about the Prophecy first and then we'll work our way up?"
"The prophecy is top secret," said Dumbledore, smiling kindly. But in his mind he was panicking. If Lily managed to foil his plans, then everything shall be ruined. "I cannot tell you the exact wording of it, my dear." Since the auburn-haired woman had not hexed him yet, he continued. "But, it tells of a boy born on the end of July who will vanquish Voldemort once and for all when he rises again."
"And are you sure that he will rise again?" asked Lily in a deceptively calm voice. Rather like the calm before the storm, not that Dumbledore noticed.
"Absolutely, my dear girl," said our resident manipulator. His blue eyes twinkled madly.
"Then explain to me, professor," said Lily, "why you are sure that Charles is the one mentioned when it is Harry with the scar reeking with dark magic."
"My dear, it is very obvious," said Albus Dumbledore, looking every bit the doting grandfather. "Charlie here has the ability to wield light magic, which killed Voldemort for the time being. Harry however," he cast a look behind Lily, "is a dark wizard."
"And how do you know that he is a dark wizard, headmaster?" asked Lily, sounding as innocent as a 5 year old girl asking her grandfather why it rains.
"My dear, when you are as old as I," here the man puffed himself up, "you will learn that there is always a good sibling and an evil sibling or a good twin and an evil twin. Just look at the case of the Messrs. Black and you and your sister."
By now, he should have realized that his conversation partner was getting exceedingly angry. But, he being as dumb as a door, did not. "Always, professor?" asked Lily in that same innocent voice. At his nod, she asked him, "So, what about the Prewett twins, Fabian and Gideon? Or the Weasley family? And the Weasley twins, Fred and George? Are they divided in good and evil too?" When the old man failed to answer, she pestered him some more.
"There are, of course, exceptions to every case," said Dumbledore, after a minute of Lily badgering him with examples of siblings, including his brother Aberforth and him.
Lily's eyes gained a glint at that. "So how do you know that Harry and Charlie aren't exceptions?"
"Um-um...," Dumbledore seemed to be at a loss of words. "That doesn't matter right now, my dear. First, we need to take Harry away before he can be a bad influence on Charles. It will be best for you and your family to nurture him without dark magic influence." The latter part was said with seriousness and certainty.
Lily closed her eyes and counted backwards from ten. Her eye had developed a twitch and her jaw was set. "Best...for my family?" she said with a strained smile.
"Yes, indeed, my dear," said Dumbledore placing a hand on her shoulder, but jerking it way right after seeing a killer glare from Lily. "You need not bother about Harry, I will take...care of him. Just, nurture Charles into the," here he paused for dramatic effect, "Boy Who Lived!"
"The 'Boy Who Lived'?" asked Lily.
"Yes, my dear," nodded Dumbledore. "It is the name that the world will call Charles Potter.
"Really? And what about Harry?" asked Lily.
"Oh, everything has been made ready for Harry, there is no need to concern yourself," Dumbledore assured her, nodding with grandfatherly authority. "Now, if you would kindly step aside..."
Lily stood firm. "Professor, I have stood up to Voldemort, and might I say that he is far more persuasive than you are. Tell me what you are going to do to Harry."
"Ah, well, I have to say I am impressed by your loyalty to your children. Very well, I will explain it to you so you can put it out of your mind," the old man offered generously. "I will have Hagrid take the boy - I would trust no other than him with the task, of course," he said soothingly and winced at Lily's smoldering glance. "He will take Harry to your sister who will take good care of him, no doubt. She is your closest blood relative, other than Charlie, of course."
"This plan of your seems brilliant, headmaster,"said Lily, her voice loaded with sarcasm, not that Dumbledore noticed. As the man preened, preened, she asked him, "What if Petunia doesn't entertain your scheme?"
"She will, she will," assured Dumbledore. "She is, after all, your sister."
"Didn't you just tell me that she was 'the evil sibling'?" asked Lily, still not convinced.
"It was a mistake," said Dumbledore, forcefully.
"Uh-uh," said Lily. "Tell me how you will explain to Tuney that she has to take care of her sister's son. She hates me." At Dumbledore's silence, she demanded from him again to tell her.
Dumbledore coughed softly. She sounded like the drums of death. "Well, I shall write a letter to Petunia so that she will understand the severity of this situation," he said with a smile.
"You will write a letter to her?" Lily asked, incredulously. "And Hagrid will hand Harry over along with the letter you will write to her?" she added. "Like post?"
"Oh no, of course not, don't be silly, my dear girl," the old man said, shaking his head in amusement. "Hagrid will leave Harry on the porch with the letter, of course. He will be fine. It is November. Not too cold."
"He will?" the woman asked, raising her eyebrows. He had never noticed how bright green her eyes were, though he would prefer her not glaring at him. "Leave him on the porch, with a letter, in November, and then I suppose he'll just leave?"
"Yes, of course. Hagrid and I have many important duties at Hogwarts, so we can't waste too much time at this," Dumbledore nodded, and then tried to once more get past her. "Now, like I said, everything has been arranged. How about you take Charles and perhaps put him down for his evening nap? I shall take care of everything."
"Not quite so fast, headmaster. I believe I don't quite understand this yet," Lily said, stepping in his way again, magic sparking around her. Dumbledore gulped. "And what do you suppose will happen to Harry after this most brilliant scheme of yours? I suppose you are aware of my sister's attitude towards everything magical, hm?"
"Yes, indeed. That is the very essence of my plan, of course," the old man assured. "See, because of the darkness within him, it is best that Harry learns humility in the care of a family that will not spoil him for being the brother of the Boy-Who-Lived."
"Charles' name will be known far and wide and he will be hailed as the hero. Everyone will know his name," he nodded with satisfaction at the thought of it. "It's best that Harry be kept from all of this, so that he won't get any foolish notions of grandeur."
"And I suppose growing up famous will be just the perfect environment for Charlie?"
"Indeed," the old man nodded. "He deserves it, after all, he did a big service he did for the wizarding world. The sooner he understands his own value and acts upon it, the better for him. Harry, I'm afraid, will never understand and his jealousy of Charles' fame and the extra training I will be giving his brother to ensure his superiority to Harry would drive him further into the arms of darkness. Well more than he already is." He shook his head sadly. "It is a great misfortune."
"So, he must go to my abusive sister instead. Of course, that is the solution to everything, abuse," Lily spoke with clenched teeth.
"I'm delighted you understand, my dear," Dumbledore agreed, and tried to get past her only to get stung by a stinging hex. He coughed and then quickly stuck a false smile on his face again. "It is all for the best. Harry will grow up to become the darkest wizard, and when Voldemort returns..."
"How can you guarentte that he will return?" Lily asked.
"I can," the old man nodded pompously. "Harry will join his side when he does. It is best that the relationship between him and Charles be distant so that he can defeat him and Voldemort, once and for all."
"You have this all planned out quite well, don't you?" Lily asked, her eyes blazing with otherworldly power. "And tell me, if Harry grows up to be a dark wizard, wouldn't it be best to perhaps just stop him by showing him the light?"
"I know the urge to smother the seed of evil at infancy is very tempting, but we must never stoop to their level," Dumbledore said, hurriedly trying to steer her away from such an evil mindset. "There is still a chance that Charles might, before the end, be able to persuade Harry back to the side of light, but only after Harry has served his time in Azkaban, I'm sure he will be truly regretful of his choices."
"Oh, Harry is going to Azkaban, now, is he?" Lily asked, her hair starting to fly about. A lesser man might have ran away at this point, but not Dumbledore. "I suppose that's for 'The Greater Good'?"
"It's too soon to say, my dear," Dumbledore said remorsefully. "There's a chance that he might grow more evil when kept captured, but we must not let possibilities influence our actions."
"Of course we mustn't," Lily agreed. All of her hair was in the air now, and the air was loaded with the rattling energy that made her hair spark and flicker. Behind her, the boys were giggling as their hair started to stand up as well. "And what do you suppose will happen to Charles whilst Harry becomes dark, hm?"
"Charles will be the symbol of light, of course," Dumbledore reassured her. "He will have a long standing friendship with the youngest son of the Weasley family - the very lightest of all pure-blood families. I believe he will also form a friendship with a brilliant muggle-born witch, to balance his connections to the magical world. Together they will be the very personification of Gryffindor house and I assure you, you couldn't be prouder."
"I see. And I suppose Harry will not be in Gryffindor, then?" the woman asked, raising her eyebrows.
"Of course not – he'll be sorted into Slytherin right away," Dumbledore told her like she was saying a very amusing joke. "It will only lead him to his fall,enabling him to make connections with the children of dark families, but it's all for the best. That way, Severus- who will teach at Hogwarts- can keep an eye on him, you see," the old man nodded with certainty.
"The same Severus that called me a mud blood?" Lily asked, smiling rather stone-facedly now.
"He will supply a unique perspective on things," Dumbledore agreed and when he saw that she still seemed quite worried, he chuckled. "My dear girl, I'm sure there is no reason for any worry. Harry will most likely change his name to something impressive and dark well before his fourth year, and then it will be like he has no connection to you at all," he told her.
"Oh, I was so worried," Lily answered with a toothy smile. Dumbledore hadn't noticed what sharp teeth she had before. 'All the more better to eat you with my dear'. He shook that thought away. He needed to stop reading muggle fairy tales.
"Now, how about I take Harry, and you can put all this trouble behind you? And when your husband comes home, you can perhaps take a little trip out of the country to celebrate. I hear Maine is very nice this time of the year."
"What a wonderful suggestion," Lily growled while behind her the boys squealed with delight. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment. After exhaling very slowly, she opened them again. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind, headmaster, thank you very much. But before that, whatever would've happened if it had been the Longbottom residence that Voldemort had attacked? I understand Neville fit the criteria of the Prophecy as well."
"Oh, my dear, it never would've been Neville, surely you understand that," Dumbledore said, shaking his head sadly at her ignorance. "Voldemort was sure to select the half-blood over the pure-blood; that's just the way he is. And of course, young Neville doesn't fit the role of a hero at all."
"And that's why our house went under the Fidelius while they needed no such protections?" Lily asked. Her hair was curling now together into thicker, locks that spiraled backwards, rather like horns. "It wasn't to make our family seem the more important one while theirs was of lesser importance?"
"Oh, of course not," Dumbledore assured, smiling kindly in answer. However had Lily managed to change her pupils into slits? Marvelous bit of magic. Of course, she was always brilliant at magic. "Now how about-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhhhhhh!"
"Lily-Flower?" said James Potter as he entered through the floo. "Honey, I'm home!" Silence greeted him. "Lily!" he yelled. What happened? "Harry! Charlie!" No answer. He grew steadily more and more worried. That was when he heard a shriek from the recently-repaired nursery. He thundered up the stairs and threw open the door to find...to find Lily strangling a creature that looked vaguely like Albus Dumbledore. Creature because it has burns and boils and something that oozes all over his body.
"Oh James," Lily turned towards him, her emerald eyes flashing. "You're home. Wait till you hear the idea Dumbledore has presented to me."
To those who have read the original work, I am aware that a lot of this is similar to the original. Please don't sue me. I barely have enough money to pay my tuition. She's a better writer than I am.