Chapter 33

Jennie

I tried to roll over but I couldn't move, it felt like someone had replaced my limbs with sandbags. And my head … holy crap, my head. Every time I moved it, I thought it was going to break free and roll right off the end of my bed.

How the hell did I get into my bed?

The harder I tried to remember last night, the louder the blood rushed in my ears. My head felt like it was being squeezed in a lion's mouth, a very angry lion who was being stabbed with a scalding hot fireplace poker.

Groaning as I rolled over, I peeked one eye open to see the clock, but a piece of paper covered it. I lifted my 700 pound arm and snatched the piece of paper off my nightstand, blinking rapidly until the words came into focus.

We're in the family room. Take your time and the aspirin.

-Lisa

As painful as it was, I lifted my head and saw two aspirin and a glass of water next to my clock. I sat up in bed and concentrated on nothing but breathing for a few minutes.

In and out. In and out.

The waves of nausea finally calmed into ripples, allowing me to reach over and scoop up the pills. I popped them into my mouth and took a sip of water. The sip turned into a giant gulp as I chugged mouthful after mouthful of the cold, refreshing liquid. I set the empty glass down and looked at my outfit. Lisa must have put pajamas on me too.

I wanted nothing more than to burrow myself deep into my bed for the next twelve hours, but my bladder wasn't having it. Dragging myself upright, I silently wondered if I was still drunk. Everything hurt. Holy crap, did I drink too much last night or run a marathon?

I limbered to the bathroom and then made my way out to the family room to see what my girls were up to, praying someone was watching them.

I turned the corner to the family room and stopped dead in my tracks.

"What the…" I mumbled, trying to force my brain to process what I was seeing.

Ruby and Jane had a salon set up in the living room. Lisa was propped up on the couch with cotton balls stuffed in between her toes, a mess of pink polish on her nails and her hair was pulled up into ten different short ponytails and dotted with barrettes.

She cocked her head to the side and narrowed her eyes at me. "You tell anyone about this, I'll tell the world you drool in your sleep, a lot."

A laugh escaped my lips, causing the pressure in my head to accelerate to an excruciating level. "Ow, ow, ow," I whined, holding the sides of my head as I backed into the kitchen and fell onto a chair.

"See? That's what you get," Lisa teased. "Hey guys, I'm gonna take a break. I'll be right back, okay?"

"My turn!" Ruby called, offering to take Lisa's place.

She walked over and bent down, placing a gentle kiss on the top of my head.

"Ow. Even my hair hurts."

"Serves you right, Martini queen." She laughed.

"Shhh, not so loud. Maybe a whisper for today?" I rested my head on my hands and prayed for death.

"You hungry?" Her words made my stomach turn. "Maybe you'd like a … green apple?"

"Are you trying to make me sick?" I mumbled against the wood table.

"Not really, but this is kinda fun. How about some coffee?" She stood and turned the coffee pot on.

"Yes, please." I growled.

Lisa didn't talk through my whole first cup of coffee and half of my second. She told the girls Mommy had a headache and promised them that if they played quietly, she'd let them paint her fingernails later.

"Do you remember anything about last night?" she finally asked.

I thought hard, but nothing came back. "The last thing I really remember is walking my mom and Fred to the car. Where is Mom, anyway?"

"She said she had breakfast plans with a friend but didn't want to go because of your … condition." She chuckled. "I told her I'd watch the girls and take care of you."

"You handled the girls all right," I teased as I filled my coffee cup for the third time. I may not sleep for the next two days because of all the caffeine, but as long as the headache was gone, that was just fine by me.

"Last night was interesting." Lisa had a funny look on her face.

"Did I do anything stupid?"

"Nope, not at all." She cocked an eyebrow at me. "But you're one hell of a dancer."

I groaned and dropped my head back onto my hands, harder than I intended to. "Ow. Did you put me in bed?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Did you change me?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Did we…" My eyes darted over to make sure the girls couldn't hear us.

She laughed. "No. I'm not exactly into necrophilia—you were passed out before the first stoplight. You did say one interesting thing though."

"What was that?" I asked, without lifting my head to look at her.

"You said you loved me."

I stopped breathing, as panic filled my chest and made my head pound harder. Slowly, I lifted my head and looked at Lisa who was smiling contentedly, blowing on her own mug of coffee.

"I did?"

She nodded slowly, her eyes searching my face.

"Sorry about that." I cringed.

She pulled her brows together and frowned at me. "Sorry? Why would you apologize?"

"I was drunk, I shouldn't have said that."

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you love me?"

Oh God, oh God. I wanted to puke and it didn't have anything to do with my hangover. My head hurt, and now my heart hurt. Looking at Lisa's soulful eyes, knowing she was waiting for an answer I couldn't give her was hard. Too hard.

I did love her. I loved her so much I sometimes couldn't breathe around her, but I couldn't tell her that. I would never let those words leave my mouth; that would make all of this too real. It would give her all the power.

I wanted to get up and leave the room, but Jisoo's voice nagging me to 'stop running' kept ringing through my head. Her voice wasn't the only one in my head. Blaire's was there too, cackling and warning me that I was nothing but a summer fling. If Lisa was just going to throw me away, there was no way I was going to tell her the truth.

"Jennie." Lisa's voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

My eyes traveled around her face … the face of the person I loved, the face I had to lie to in order to protect myself.

I took a deep breath.

"No."