AN: Like the white rabbit, I'm very very late! Many thanks and a bag of sherbert lemons to my lovely followers and reviewers – you guys are the Fred to my George (sob!). I'll do my best to reply to your comments as soon as possible Until then, happy reading!

Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling

Chapter Eleven

The Memory

September 1st 1991

Kingsley was a morning person – always had been.

He loved the office first thing, before the air hummed with the rush of memos as they zoomed through the department; before the cubicles were filled with his loud, sometimes abrasive, colleagues.

This morning, he had gone for a run, showered, eaten breakfast and kissed his sleeping girlfriend goodbye. Now he was sitting with a mug of coffee, ready to dive into a new case that had just crossed his desk and –

"Alright Kingsley?"

He looked up to see Proudfoot in the doorway. Unlike him, Proudfoot was a night-owl, to the horror of London's nocturnal criminals. It was rare to see her in the office before 8 o'clock in the morning, and if you did, it was because someone's head was about to roll. Kingsley hoped it wasn't his own.

"Morning Edelia," he said, nodding at her and trying to think of any reason she might have to pummel him. She smiled back, but didn't move.

"How's the new digs working out?" she said, leaning against the door frame. "Have you gotten used to living with a woman yet?"

Kingsley laughed. "Well, she's not as tidy as Remus, but least she can cook."

The other Auror sniggered. "Ah now, there are at least five dishes Remus can make without poisoning anyone. Besides, he never needed to cook with you around."

Kingsley smiled. It was true – he had always been the cook, while Remus was the cleaner; a system which had worked well over the eight years they had lived together. Remus was unrivalled in his skill and bizarre knowledge of household spells – he had a spell to remove chewing gum from fur rugs, to unclog hair from drains, to wax and polish wooden floors. This made up for his abysmal lack of talent in the kitchen, where perhaps one in ten of his experiments were edible. How the man had scraped a pass in Auror-level potions was anyone's guess.

They had made a good team, and if he was being honest, Kingsley missed living with his best friend. But he had been with Eloise for nearly two years and he wanted to move forward in their relationship. Living together had been the next logical step.

"At least he has Faye to feed him," he said, but his words felt a bit feeble.

Proudfoot snorted. "She doesn't strike me as a woman who gets her hands dirty. Or waits on a man, either – which may be the only thing I like about her."

"I'm sure she has plenty of good qualities," Kingsley said.

"None that I've found so far."

Kingsley was secretly inclined to agree, but he didn't want to speak ill of her behind Remus's back. No matter how self-centred or shallow Kingsley thought Faye was, his friend loved her. At least, he said he did.

"Remus is happy," he said shortly, not sure which of them he was trying to convince. "So keep your feelings about her to yourself."

Proudfoot's jaw tightened. "He only thinks he's happy. But you can untwist your knickers, Shacklebolt. I'm not going to get in his way."

Kingsley relaxed back in his chair and picked his quill up again, happy to put an end to this conversation. Unfortunately, Proudfoot showed no signs of leaving.

Now that he thought about it, Proudfoot was not the type of person to linger for chitchat.

"Something else on your mind, Edelia?" he said, setting down his quill again.

The other Auror paused for a moment, as though rethinking her reason for coming in. But a moment later, she glanced behind her, waved her wand to shut the door, and took a seat in the visitor's chair. "Actually, I'd like your help with something."

Curious. Kingsley felt himself lean forward, his new case forgotten. "With what, precisely?"

"I assume Remus told you about our conversation with Scrimgeour after the Leaky Cauldron incident?"

"No?"

"Oh. Well, Scrimgeour threw down the old 'top secret and confidential' rule. I assumed Remus would have told you anyway."

"He normally does," Kingsley said, as his stomach sank a little. It wasn't like Remus to keep something from him; they were closer than brothers. He trusted his friend implicitly. "What's going on?"

Proudfoot quickly filled him in on Scrimgeour's suspicions about Nymphadora Tonks and what they had witnessed afterwards in the Atrium.

"Is there any actual evidence against her?"

"Nothing concrete, just too many coincidences. And you know coincidences are bollocks in this line of work."

Kingsley scrubbed a hand over his beard. "True. Even though I can't believe it...I was sure she was on our side."

"Me too, it's been eating at me for weeks. I can barely look at her without feeling angry and guilty all at once." Proudfoot crossed her arms, sinking back into the chair.

They sat quietly for a minute, stewing in their respective thoughts. Kingsley fiddled with the end of his quill. Maybe he had been too quick to assume the best of Tonks, but he hated to believe that a person should be condemned because of their family. If he had assumed the worst of Harry because of his idiot of an uncle, Vernon Dursley, then he would have missed out on what an amazing child the boy was.

"How do you propose to uncover the truth?" he asked, eventually.

Proudfoot leaned forward. "I have a plan and I'd like you to help me execute it."

Kingsley crossed his arms, puzzled. "Not that I'm not flattered my name popped to mind, but why haven't you asked Remus? He's your partner. What does he think about this situation, anyway?"

Proudfoot prodded the sneakoscope perched on the desk. "Honestly, I don't know. And I'd rather not involve him until I know the truth, one way or the other. With Harry starting Hogwarts today, he doesn't need another Black family traitor reminding him of the worst period of his life. It's better he stays out of it."

"You're probably right." That awful feeling was twisting his stomach again. He didn't want to go behind Remus's back, but if it would protect him... Kingsley sighed. "So, what's your plan?"

A hint of wickedness coloured Proudfoot's gaze, and Kingsley could see why more than a few dark wizards had cried under her interrogation. "How's your Legilimency?"

(-)(-)(-)

"You're having me on," Harry said, staring at the barrier between platforms 9 and 10. "There's no way that's the entrance!"

Remus could barely breathe, he was laughing so hard. They had been standing there for at least five minutes, with Harry making a similar sort of exclamation every few seconds.

The morning had been going swimmingly up to this point. Remus had woken Harry early and taken him for breakfast in Lily's Café – which thankfully had been an uneventful experience this time, except that they had eaten barely anything between them. Harry had looked a little green, and Remus had to admit that his stomach wasn't feeling the best either. How was he going to bear, not seeing his godson all the time? It would be four months before he would see Harry again – and that was assuming the kid even wanted to come to him for Christmas! What if Harry loved Hogwarts so much that he would rather stay there for holidays? The thought made Remus push away his untouched plate of eggs, and he spent the remainder of breakfast watching Harry nibble on a corner of his pancake, his eyes distracted.

But when they arrived at King's Cross the mood lightened considerably, largely because Harry was incredibly suspicious and Remus's heightened emotions meant he found this utterly hilarious.

"Harry, I swear this isn't a prank," Remus said, wiping his eyes. "I know it seems more than a little odd, but this genuinely is the entrance to Platform 9 and ¾."

Harry narrowed his eyes. "That doesn't sound like a real platform. How do I know there even is a wizarding school, and that this hasn't been some really elaborate prank?"

Remus crossed his arms. "You think I recruited the entire Weasley family to help me prank you?"

"I wouldn't put it past you, Remus."

The Auror sniggered, then adopted a serious tone again. "But you played Quidditch with them, Harry. Explain that."

"The brooms were on wires."

"Wires...that somehow came from the sky."

Harry blinked. "Well...I haven't figured the exact details out yet."

Remus forced back another snigger. "I see. And all the magic you've seen me perform?"

"Smoke and really large mirrors."

"Nope."

Harry glanced back at the barrier again, chewing his lip, and Remus suddenly wanted to slap himself.

Harry was nervous – scared, even. Remus's memories of Hogwarts were so wonderful that he had forgotten just how terrified he had been that very first day. Before he had friends and a house and a place where he belonged.

Swallowing hard, Remus reached out and squeezed his godson's shoulder.

"How about we do it together?" he said, softly. "I'll be beside you the whole time."

Harry looked up at him and nodded. "Yeah, alright. On three?"

Remus placed his hand beside Harry's on the trolley. "One..."

Harry took a deep breath. "Two..."

"THREE!"

They ran, and suddenly Remus felt eleven years old again, his body trembling with the memory of this moment. Of leaving the Muggle world behind and plunging forward into somewhere he had only seen in his imagination. A place he could figure out who he truly was.

But before he could dwell on this, they had passed through the entrance and were suddenly on the platform. The Hogwarts Express stood, as it always did, gleaming in the dusty morning light that filtered through the station windows. As he watched plumes of steam billow out, Remus's heart gave a hard thump of longing.

"It's real," Harry whispered, "All of it is real."

Remus wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "It's all real, kid."

"Hey Harry!"

Ron Weasley had appeared at Harry's side. Behind him, Remus could see the rest of the Weasley brood clustered around Molly, who was handing out homemade sandwiches.

"I've found a compartment." Ron's ears turned bright red. "I mean, if you want to sit together, you don't have to –"

"Of course I do," Harry said, and Ron beamed. The twins appeared and offered to carry Harry's trunk onto the train. Feeling at a loss, Remus wandered over to Molly, who was struggling to close her handbag again.

"Hello Remus, dear," Molly said, wiggling the metal clasp. "All set?"

Remus glanced back at the door Harry had disappeared through. "Yeah, I think he's got everything."

Molly looked up and her eyes twinkled. "I meant you."

"Me? What should I be set for?"

"For letting him go."

The lump that had been sitting in Remus's throat all morning started to throb painfully.

"Of course," he croaked.

Molly smiled at him, a knowing look in her eyes. Reaching down, she took his hand and squeezed. "You'll be just fine."

Remus nodded, not trusting himself to open his mouth. Molly nodded back and released him, just as Harry appeared by his side again.

"Er, George said the train is going to leave in a minute."

Remus glanced at his pocketwatch. "Right, of course."

He and Harry stood staring at one another for a moment, neither sure what to do. In the background, Molly had pulled Ron aside and was attempting to wipe at something on his face with a handkerchief.

They were still so young, but when Harry left for school, everything would change. The years would fly past, and before long, Harry would be out on his own, making his own life. One where he might not even need Remus anymore...

Swallowing hard, Remus shook off the self-pity. His first priority was to do everything in his power to make sure Harry had the best life possible. His own feelings didn't matter.

"I don't even know what to tell you, kid," he said. "You're going to have such an amazing time – the friends you'll make, the magic you'll learn. You can't imagine how incredible it will be. Embrace every minute and never be afraid to try something new. You belong in this world."

Reaching into his jacket pocket, Remus pulled out a battered but still shining pin.

"I wanted to give you this," he said, fixing it to Harry's jumper. "My dad gave it to me on my first day at Hogwarts, for luck; and he got it from my grandfather before him. It's yours now."

Harry blinked down at the golden Hogwarts crest shining on his chest, and suddenly pitched forward, wrapping his arms around Remus's middle.

"I'll miss you, Remus. Love you."

Remus's heart felt ten times heavier as it gave another painful thump. He tightened his hold on his godson.

"I love you, Harry," he whispered, pressing a kiss to the boy's hair. "I'm going to miss you, far more than you know."

They stood like that for a long moment, until the train gave a warning blare, steam billowing from its chimney. Remus quickly wiped his eyes and let go.

"Go on, get out of here," he said, ruffling Harry's hair. "Go learn something. And don't let me hear you've been duelling trolls or anything."

Harry gave a watery laugh and ran back to Ron, who had finally managed his extract himself from his mother's grasp and was climbing back onto the train. Weasley heads popped out from various windows to wave at their mother and Ginny, who was laughing and crying as the train began to pull out from the platform.

Harry leaned out and waved too. Remus waved back, and kept on waving, even when the train had disappeared from sight.

An arm wrapped around his waist and he looked down to see Molly's bright eyes smiling up at him.

"Alright?"

"Yeah," Remus whispered, "I'll be alright." He glanced down as a small parcel was pressed into his hand. "What's this?"

"I made you a sandwich too."

(-)(-)(-)

"We're getting Occlumency lessons? Why?"

Tonks and Walden rolled their eyes at one another. Trust Grayson to kick up a fuss over a great opportunity. Proudfoot crossed her arms over her chest and fixed him with a look of unimpressed impatience.

"Have you got something better to do this afternoon, Thistle?"

"No, I just think it's a bit weird, that's all. I thought Occlumency was second year training."

"It is. Unfortunately, Aurors need to protect themselves against attacks on the mind, as well as the body, and dark witches and wizards won't wait until next year when you've had the appropriate training."

Grayson's cheeks coloured a little, as the recruits sniggered at him and Proudfoot turned back to the group.

"Since Auror McAuliffe is unavailable to teach his usual class today, this is the alternative lesson. Take it or leave it."

"We'll definitely take it!" Tonks said, Walden nodding vigorously beside her.

She had planned to sneak into the Auror archives after lunch to spend their free afternoon searching for a suitable cold case – one guaranteed to get her one-on-one time with Lupin. But Lupin was out of the office and an extra day would give her more time to find the right one. Plus, the opportunity to learn Occlumency was too good to pass up.

"Who's going to train us?"

Proudfoot frowned. "Me. I assumed that was obvious, given that I'm the one telling you this. Auror Shacklebolt will be assisting me and also moderating. He's a brilliant Occlumens, but not a Legilimens, so he'll be able to give you advice on how to keep me from getting too far into your head."

The laughter quickly died away.

"You mean you'll be getting inside our heads straight away?" Tonks asked, her stomach flip-flopping at the thought.

Proudfoot leaned back against the desk. "The best – and only, really – way to learn Occlumency is through fear. Fear of someone else seeing your darkest secrets and happiest memories and using them against you. I can teach you all the exercises you can practice to develop your skills, but without knowing just how disturbing and destructive it can be to have someone else in your mind, there won't be any real incentive to try."

"I'll try," Theodore said quickly, "I understand entirely, I don't need incentive."

Nodding in approval, Proudfoot got to her feet again and took several rolls of parchment from her bag.

"This is a beginner's elective class, so if you really don't want to, or are not ready for this, there is no pressure to take it on. But if you decide that you are ready, take one of these forms, sign it and bring it with you later. They state that I cannot mention anything I see in your mind to anyone but you – unless I believe you to be a danger to yourself or someone else. They also stipulate that you do not reveal anything that goes on in the class – it is important for your classmates to feel safe and not judged." She flicked the clasp on her bag closed. "I'll leave you all to think about it."

After she left, Tonks let out a deep breath. Walden sank down into a chair, chewing his fingernails.

"I will do it," Irene said, tossing her hair back. "I have nothing to hide."

"I'll do it as well," Miriam said. Her face was a little pale, but she set her jaw.

Tonks nodded as well, as she didn't trust her voice to come out steady. Did she have anything to hide?

(-)(-)(-)

As much as she tried to convince herself that she wasn't nervous, Tonks could feel her stomach twisting as she joined the other recruits in the training room after lunch. Proudfoot and Shacklebolt were already there, talking quietly with one another.

Proudfoot closed the door and gestured for them all to gather round in a semi-circle.

"You all came, excellent. So, I gather you know what Occlumency is."

"It's the art of closing the mind against magical attacks, most notably, Legilimency," Miriam said, in one breath.

"That's a little textbook for my liking, but you are right, Miriam," Proudfoot said. "First, I'm going to show you some exercises for clearing your minds and building up your mental shields. Then, I'm going to attempt to penetrate your minds and you're going to try to stop me. Any questions? No? Excellent, let's begin."

For the first thirty minutes, they practiced breathing exercises and methods of clearing their minds. Tonks felt slightly more relaxed, but couldn't shake the nerves that had taken up residence in her stomach. What if Proudfoot saw something that she misunderstood? Was that even possible?

"Alright, we have about fifteen minutes left," Proudfoot was saying, "I'll need a few volunteers. Who wants to go first?"

"I will," Irene said, sauntering forward. Even Proudfoot seemed surprised at this; Irene was rarely the first volunteer for any task. She never seemed afraid, just a bit apathetic.

"Okay, Irene, on the count of three, I'm going to use Legilimency on you. I will remain in your mind for twenty seconds, unless you can push me back out using the techniques we just practised. Understand?"

Irene nodded.

"One, two, three – Legilimens!"

The spell hit Irene. For a moment, her face contorted as though she was struggling, but suddenly Proudfoot took a step backward, her eyes wide with shock. Irene had pushed her back out.

"How on earth did you do that?" Shacklebolt asked, striding forward.

Irene smiled. "My mother, she is a mind healer. She taught me Occlumency when I was only small."

Proudfoot laughed and shook Irene's hand heartily. "I didn't see that coming. Very impressive mental shielding, Irene. Very impressive indeed."

Irene gave a shrug and sauntered back to the group. The rest of the recruits looked even more terrified.

"Alright, who's up next?"

"I'll go," Theodore said, and instantly looked as though he regretted his decision.

Proudfoot repeated the instructions and cast the spell. For twenty seconds, Theodore's face was a mask of agony, as though he was trying with all his might, but he couldn't fight her off.

"Good effort, Theodore. Keep practising the techniques and you'll get there."

Shacklebolt glanced up at the clock. "We're running out of time, Auror Proudfoot. Maybe just one more."

Proudfoot nodded. "Who wants to try it?" Her eyes scanned the group and settled on Tonks. "Tonks, thank you for volunteering. Step forward please."

"Er, I –"

Tonks looked behind her, to find the rest of the recruits had taken a massive step backwards, leaving her standing at the front of the group. Walden mouthed 'sorry' at her. Rolling her shoulders back, Tonks stepped forward.

"You heard the instructions I gave Irene and Theodore? Same process."

"My mother never taught me Occlumency, so this might go a little differently," Tonks joked, cringing at the waver in her voice.

Proudfoot's smile widened as she raised her wand. "That's just fine. On the count of three – one, two, three!"

The spell hit Tonks and the room in front of her disappeared as her eyes rolled back and memories darted across her vision.

Flickers of the duel in The Leaky Cauldron, flares of red and yellow lighting the room as spells went everywhere. Lupin reaching for his wand underneath the table, his other arm in bloody tatters. Then –

Tonks receiving her acceptance letter to the Auror Squad, staring at it in disbelief as her father hugged her and her mother dropped her teacup. And –

Almost knocking Charlie Weasley from his broom during the last Quidditch Cup Final –

Proudfoot wasn't settling on any particular memory – she was just wandering freely and easily through Tonks's memories, like she was window-shopping. Tonks tried to push back. The memory of the Quidditch match started to fade, but Proudfoot easily shoved her defences out of the way and continued her excursion. Then suddenly, the memories became darker –

Her mother's tearful face as she ripped up photographs, throwing them into the fire –

Elisa Biggles calling her a half-blood freak and then screaming as the hex Tonks cast caused her nose to swell –

Sirius lifting her up for a hug during his last visit –

Tonks gritted her teeth and pushed back harder. Proudfoot knocked her defences out of the way again, before finally withdrawing.

"Good," she said, approvingly. "You didn't force me out, but you were able to fight back. We'll try that again, if you like?"

"Perhaps that's enough for today?" Shacklebolt said, in his deep voice. His eyes were oddly wary.

Proudfoot sighed and made to tuck away her wand. "You're right, Shacklebolt. First years can't handle a lot."

Tonks clenched her fists, but then she thought about what Robbie had said – that she needed to impress her superiors. Maybe she could do this; she just needed to think of an inventive way to protect her mind.

"I can do it again," she said. "I want to try it again."

Proudfoot raised her head, looking her over with a small smile. "Alright then. Show me what you have." She raised her wand. "Legilimens!"

Pointing her wand at Grayson and firing a spell that almost hit Lupin. His eyes meeting hers –

Her first date with Robbie, as he leaned in to kiss her –

Tonks tried to push back using the Occlumency exercises, but it wasn't working. There was only one thing left to try.

"Protego!" Tonks shouted in her mind, casting a non-verbal shielding spell.

The presence in her mind instantly vanished. There was a brilliant flash of light, and suddenly Tonks was in a memory that wasn't her own.

All she could hear was screaming.

She was running up a flight of stairs with a much younger Kingsley Shacklebolt. His wand was gripped tightly in his hand, his eyes panicked.

They arrived on an upstairs landing. Tonks couldn't make out where they were, but it looked like someone's home, tastefully decorated. Further down the corridor, she could see framed photos hanging on the walls. She started to move towards one of them, when another scream pierced the air, making her shake with dread.The sound was louder up here, and when the next scream came, Tonks realised it was coming from a room behind them. Every hair on her body seemed to be standing up and her stomach was in knots. Whoever was making that noise was surely being tortured. She could just make out words in the cries, strangled and guttural.

"No, please, don't! NO!"

The screams rose and Kingsley's face paled. He began to move quickly but silently towards the door. Taking a deep breath, his free hand reached out to push the door open, into a dark room where she could just make out the back of someone lying on a bed –

"ENOUGH!"

Tonks felt herself fly backwards, landing flat on her back on the padded floor.

Shacklebolt was staring at her, wide-eyed. His chest was heaving, as though he had just been running through that house for real and the realisation of what had happened hit her.

She had been in Shacklebolt's memories. The spell had rebounded and hit him, not Proudfoot.

"Class dismissed," Proudfoot said, her face white. "Everyone out."

(-)(-)(-)

Tonks sat at her desk that evening, still shaking. She hadn't seen Shacklebolt or Proudfoot for the remainder of the day – not that she wanted to.

The other recruits had tried to press her for details of what she had seen, but had eventually given up when she hadn't said a word. She wasn't even sure herself.

Shacklebolt had been running to help someone, that much was clear. But if it had been related to a case, would he have looked so upset when he realised what she had seen? Surely he would have just explained what had happened.

Therefore, it must have been personal. Someone he cared about was being hurt.

Tonks rested her head in her hands. She'd had a headache since the end of class; it felt as though someone was stomping on her brain repeatedly.

Was she going to be sacked? Hitting an Auror with a spell like that without their permission had to be grounds for severe disciplinary action, if not dismissal.

Her hands shook as she got to her feet. She had to know.

Shacklebolt's office door was ajar and she could hear raised voices as she crept towards the door, stepping behind a filing cabinet.

"Don't blame me. This was your hare-brained idea, Proudfoot."

"How was I to know she was going to use a shielding spell? Genius idea, really."

"It's not the girl's fault either. You underestimated the recruits and it backfired."

"Look, you said yourself that she didn't see anything, it was just a nightmare –"

"That doesn't matter, it never should have happened in the first place. What if she had seen something she shouldn't have? Everyone is entitled to their privacy, and he trusts me with his memories."

"Next time I'll be more careful."

"There won't be a next time," Kingsley barked, "You didn't find anything – your experiment failed."

"I know you're embarrassed, but this isn't about you. If you cared about your best friend, you would admit we need answers."

Proudfoot stormed out of the office, slamming the door behind her. Tonks flattened herself against the wall, her mind reeling as the other Auror strode past without seeing her.

The experiment failed? What experiment? Had the class been some kind of set up?

And what did Proudfoot mean, if Shacklebolt cared about his best friend? She had never had the impression that he and Proudfoot were anything more than colleagues, let alone best friends. The only person Shacklebolt seemed really close to was Lupin –

Tonks gave a quiet groan. The memory had something to do with Lupin. Of course it did. Why was everything to do with bloody Lupin?

"Eavesdropping, are we?"

Tonks nearly leapt out of her skin. Moody was standing a few feet away, both eyes trained on her. This day officially could not get any worse.

"Auror Moody, I –"

He looked her over for a moment and his craggy face softened a little.

"Come with me, lass," he said.

Silently, she followed him to his office. This was really it, the end of her career as an Auror. Grayson would be unbearable.

"Sit down," Moody said, gesturing to the visitor's chair.

Tonks remained standing. "Should I clear out my desk, sir?"

"Why, is it filthy? You should always keep a tidy desk – I've seen more than one witch or wizard loose a limb because of clutter."

"Er, that's not what I meant sir. I meant...you know..." She trailed off.

"No, I don't know," Moody barked, "Spit it out!"

Tonks quickly explained what happened in the Occlumency class. By the end, Moody was roaring with laughter.

"Why would I sack you, girl? You managed to get inside the head of a senior Auror. Back in the day, I would have promoted you!"

"But – but," Tonks stammered, finally taking a seat, "but Auror Shacklebolt is really upset. I think it was bad, whatever it was." She swallowed. "It sounded like someone was being tortured."

Moody's grin faded. "Aye, maybe it was. A lot of us have bad memories, Tonks, – it's part of the job. Most of us wouldn't want to share them. I'll speak to Shacklebolt."

Tonks smiled gratefully, but the knot in her stomach was still there. She wondered if she could talk to Moody... He certainly was staring at her as though he expected her to say more, and suddenly the words were out of her mouth before she could stop them.

"Sir, I feel like a lot of the squad don't trust me."

Moody grunted. "You're probably right. Your extended family is a hall of fame for deluded servants of The Dark Lord. Not to worry – the smart ones will come 'round eventually."

Tonks didn't agree, but she nodded anyway.

Moody nodded back, then out of the blue asked, "How are you getting along with Lupin?"

"Good! Fine. Okay..." Tonks sighed. "I'm not really sure, sir."

"I thought so; he doesn't give much away. Although he'd say that's the pot calling the kettle black. Has he ever mentioned your cousin to you?"

Tonks shook her head. Moody grunted again.

"Of course not. Stubborn prick, I told him to clear the air with you." The old Auror leaned his forearms on the desk, folding his gnarled hands together. "I assume you know Sirius was his friend."

"Yeah, my dad told me." She looked up. "Did you know him, sir?"

Moody hesitated for a second, then nodded. "I did, lass. Brilliant wizard, charming fella. None of us saw it coming."

Tonks tried to swallow the lump rising inside her, but her throat was aching. "Right. Mum always said he hated Bellatrix. I don't know why he chose her side in the end..."

"There are never simple explanations in war," Moody said. "People do the unexpected and show who they really are."

"I thought I knew who he really was," Tonks whispered, then cleared her throat, appalled to find herself blinking back tears.

Moody watched her for a moment and settled back in his chair. "Did your parents ever tell you about your aunt's arrest?"

Tonks shook her head, confused. "No. I didn't know they knew anything about it."

"Maybe they didn't want to tell you; you were very young at the time. I visited them the night she was arrested." He raised an eyebrow at her. "What I'm about to tell you is classified information. I'm sure I don't need to tell you to keep it to yourself, and what will happen to you if you don't."

"Dark family secrets are my specialty, sir."

Moody gave a dark chuckle and continued.

"After the torture of the Longbottoms, I created a task force with the explicit goal of bringing in the Lestranges. There were seven Aurors involved – five seniors and two juniors. The manhunt went on for months – nearly a year in total – with a lot of near misses. By that stage, two of the Aurors had been seriously injured and the rest were losing sleep, patience and sanity. Finally, we got a tip and the five remaining members of the force went after them. Three days later, only one of them came back alive, dragging the Lestranges with him."

Moody's human eye bore into her and everything clicked into place.

"Lupin brought them in," Tonks said, "That's why he got the Order of Merlin."

Moody snorted. "For his 'troubles'. Like a bloody plaque makes it all better. The man was half dead when he got back to the Ministry and could barely speak to tell us where to find all the bodies. Took the healers days to get him right again, but the mental scars lasted a lot longer. They always do. I'm not sure he even remembers half of what happened, or he's chosen to forget it."

Tonks sank back in her chair. No wonder Lupin hadn't wanted the award; who wanted a prize for surviving all their colleagues? A horrible thought popped into her mind.

"Did Bellatrix torture him?"

Moody ignored the question. "Lupin's lived through a lot of trauma – the man lost his father and best friends before he was twenty-two. I know he might look and sound like a Hogwarts professor, but he's a fighter. And more than that, he's extremely loyal – which is the reason I'm telling you all this." Moody raised an eyebrow. "Bellatrix and Sirius might share your blood, but you are not them. You show Lupin that you have his back and he will have yours. The rest of the squad will follow his lead."

Tonks knew what Moody was saying. Even if he never chose to befriend her, Lupin would be an important ally in the Ministry. If the man who caught Bellatrix Lestrange and was betrayed by Sirius Black trusted her, no-one else could doubt her motives.

She didn't admit that she wanted Lupin to actually like her too, although she couldn't explain why.

"Why are you helping me?" she asked instead.

Both of Moody's eyes swivelled to fix on hers.

"Because, lass, I think you're tough enough to make it through training. And if you do, I can't have distrust festering among my Aurors. This is the best way forward." He grabbed a roll of parchment. "Now get out of here, I have work to do."

Tonks smiled, hope swelling inside her. "Thank you, sir." She paused at the door. "Just curious: what if you were wrong about me? What if I really was as dark as my family?"

Moody grinned. "Well, girl, then I'd kill you myself."

Tonks grinned back, because she knew he meant it.

(-)(-)(-)

AN: Next chapter, Tonks hatches her plan and Remus comes up against his arch-nemesis.

Look out for an update next month. Until then!