Hello everyone! Yep, this is it! This is the big moment that we've always been waiting for! It is FINALLY time for all of us to begin Scene 1 of Act 1 of this brand-new Broadway musical script story of mine! YAY! This scene will basically, with a musical number of course, introduce the entire audience to the entire Loud family including Lincoln, his parents Lynn Sr and Rita Loud, and his 10 sisters Lisa, Lana, Lola, Lucy, Lynn Jr, Luna, Luan, Lori, Leni, and baby Lilly. And yes, after this scene is over, the concluding author's notes at the bottom will include a shout-out to the real-life song that the musical number within this scene is based off of. So now, let's all just sit back, relax, turn off all of our portable electronic devices, and finally begin Scene 1 of Act 1 of this brand-new Broadway musical script story of mine!
(An instrumental version of "The Loud House" theme song from the cartoon begins to play in the background. As it does, the front curtain/banner rises up, revealing the first setting of the show. As it does, the instrumental version of "The Loud House" theme song stops playing in the background. This first setting is Lincoln's bedroom in the very front-center area of the stage, which consists of 2 vertical-facing wall panels in the center and separated by 8 feet, a bed on the left, a desk with school supplies, a laptop computer, and personal supplies on the right, a clothes rod with orange polar shirts and pairs of blue jeans on clothing hangers on the right, an "Ace Savvy" poster on the left, a wall-shelf with books on it on the left, a door located towards the back of said room on a wall panel in the center, a calendar hanging on said door, and a ceiling panel above said bedroom setting with a ceiling fan/light fixture hanging from it. On both sides of the bedroom setting covering the rest of the stage, 2 large wall panels painted yellow are in place, covering up the rest of the set on both the left and right side. Sleeping in the bed is the child actor playing Lincoln Loud himself, sleeping and under the covers. Lincoln snores in his sleep as the very first scene of the musical begins...)
Lincoln (snores; mumbling in sleep): You won't get away with this...(snores) This evil will be stopped...(snores) Your days of evil are numbered, you dastardly fiend...(snores) You're going to lose again...(snores)
(Suddenly, "BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!", an alarm clock on the desk goes off, waking up Lincoln, who opens his eyes, yawns, and sits up in bed. As he does, the entire audience cheers and claps very loudly upon seeing Lincoln for the first time. The child actor playing Lincoln is swearing his orange pajama long-sleeved button-up shirt and pajama pants, nothing on his bare feet, and wearing a white hair wig on his head covering his real hair. After about 30 seconds, the loud cheering and clapping from the entire audience dies down. As it does, Lincoln sits up on the edge of the bed, walks across the bedroom setting to the desk, and hits the "Snooze" button the alarm clock. After he does this, Lincoln steps back, sits back on the edge of the bed, and then turns to face the entire audience. As he does, he begins to break the 4th wall just like in the cartoon, and speaks to the entire audience...)
Lincoln: Oh, hey everyone! I just noticed you all just now! (chuckles) Sorry if I seemed tired just now, but I'm awake and ready to introduce myself! (stands up on the stage) I'm Lincoln Loud and I'm 11 years old. And welcome to my family home, also known as, The Loud House! (walks over to desk area of bedroom setting) And while "Loud" is just a last name in my family, it certainly does describe my home life...a literal LOUD house! Now you're probably thinking, "Why is your home life so loud, Lincoln?". And I'll gladly tell you the reason why. You see, a lot of you may have brothers and sisters in your lives, and I'm not exception to that. (grabs a polo shirt and a pair of jeans from hangers) I have sisters only, no other brothers...but while most of you out there might have one, two, or even three, four, or five siblings at the most, I have TEN siblings in my household...and ALL girls, too! (pulls out a wooden foldable partition from underneath bed, unfolds it, and sets it up in the center of the setting) Now, hang in a second while I change...(gets behind partition to "change" into regular clothing) And...there we go! (comes out from behind partition wearing his usual outfit consisting of a short-sleeved orange polo shirt, blue jeans with a brown waist belt, grey socks with blue and red stripes on the top, and white sneakers with small red stripes) Ah, much better! (folds up wall partition and slides it underneath bed) Now, where was I? (puts hands on hips) Ah, right! I was telling you all that I have ten sisters who I live with! Yep, that's right, ten sisters! As a result, I do have my own room, but its very small as you can see...(gestures to his bedroom setting) and it has no window...mainly because its a renovated walk-in closet. Now, about my sisters, I COULD tell you about them all right now, but...we'd spend HOURS here doing that, and I know that you all don't have THAT much time to spare! So...I think I'll just take you all around the house and introduce them to you all myself! (claps hands together) Yes, that's a good idea! (nods)
(Suddenly, some uplifting music starts playing in the background. As it does, Lincoln begins to sing the very first musical number of the show...)
Lincoln (singing): My family,
Consists of ten sisters,
And myself as one son...
My family,
The Loud family,
Is very large and hectic. (steps forward)
A typical day,
Is full of mayhem, loud noises, and family issues...
But I do what I can,
To survive my family,
And its obstacles!
They say family values are very important,
They also say that its important to love and care for everyone,
In the family!
The Loud family,
Has all of that stuff,
But it just seems...just seems...
It all seems non-existent...not-existent...
As you will soon see,
This family is very loud indeed!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln turns around and walks towards his door...)
Lincoln: Now, let's go meet the rest of my family, shall we!? (opens door and steps outside) Here we go! (closes door behind him) Just be warned though...meeting ten sisters will seem like its taking forever, but if you like, keep a count going in our head to reassure yourself that it's only ten and not one hundred sisters. (chuckles)
(As Lincoln exits the bedroom setting, the lights shinning over the front area of the stage dim. As they do, the entire setting of Lincoln's bedroom (including the vertical walls and ceiling covering) disappears below the stage via sliding trapdoor and hydraulic lift. As it does, the yellow wall panels on both the left and right side of the stage disappear from view. As it does, a larger yellow wall panel resembling the hallway of the house's 2nd floor (complete with 3 doors separated by 6 feet in-between) comes down in the center area of the stage, concealing the rest of the stage behind it. As it does, the stage lights shinning above the front area of the stage come back on. As they do, Lincoln enters stage left, and speaks to the entire audience once again...)
Lincoln (enters stage left): Now, I have ten sisters, and I'm going to introduce you to every single one! (walks over to first door on the left) First, the YOUNGEST two of the family, 1-year-old baby Lily, and 4-year-old Lisa! Now, while Lily is just a baby, Lisa, despite her being 4 years old, is a real intelligent child prodigy! That's right, she can already talk in full complete and complicated sentences, is REALLY good at math and science, and is the smartest person in our family...not to mention, the most mature! (opens door) Let's go meet her and Lily! (steps through doorway and closes door behind him)
(As Lincoln enters through the doorway and closes the door behind him, the entire wall panel rises up, revealing a massive setting resembling Lilly and Lisa's bedroom from the cartoon. The back wall panel of the setting is painted yellow, and has a window in the center covered with a green curtain, as well as a wall shelf with some books and science equipment on the left, 2 yellow wall panels vertically placed on the far left and right side, a bed on the right, a bedside table next to the front-end of the bed on the left, and a wooden desk with a large complicated and chemistry set in the center up against the window section of the wall panel, complete with colorful liquid chemicals, metal science tools, and a microscope. The left side of the room has a white crib, a baby changing station table, a pink wall lamp, a white pair of foldable closet double doors, and a pink oval-shaped rug on the floor. As the hallway wall panel rises up out of view, the actress playing Lisa Loud (a 6-year-old to create the illusion of a 4-year-old girl) is seen standing on the metal stool in front of her chemistry set desk, and is holding 2 beakers in her hands, about to mix 2 chemical liquids together. As she's doing this, an animatronic of baby Lilly Loud is seen sitting up in her crib, playing with some colorful toy keys and a few wooden alphabet blocks. As Lisa is about to mix the 2 chemicals in her hands together, Lincoln enters stage right, faces the entire audience, and begins to speak to the entire audience again...)
Lincoln: This is the bedroom of my sisters Lilly and Lisa! (walks over to the crib and faces Lilly) Hi Lilly!
Lily animatronic (smiles and laughs): Poo-poo!
Lincoln (giggles): Oh, Lily! (laughs and faces entire audience) As you can see, that is ONE thing she can see fluently. But until she grows up, she won't be able to say anything else. Now, Lisa over here...(walks up to Lisa) like I said before, is a child genius here! She's very intelligent, and...
Lisa (places beakers down): AAAHHHH! (breathes in and out) Elder brother unit, you startled me! (turns around) Lincoln, I don't mind you visiting me in my room and I, but first off all, please knock first, and second of all, don't suddenly speak up like that or I'll mess up an experiment!
Lincoln: Oh, s-sorry Lisa...(tugs on polo shirt collar) I was just introducing you to my friends and...
Lisa (waves it off): Oh, its alright, Lincoln. It was just an honest mistake...just try not to do it again. (faces the entire audience) My science experiments are my life, as you can see. Before Lincoln came in to introduce me to you, I was about to create a mixture of algae and starch, to create the basic mixture towards creating a better form of glucose. (turns around, puts a pair of safety goggles on, takes beakers from behind her and holds them in front of her) Now, let's try a mixture of a demonstration for you all, shall we? (smiles)
Lincoln (nervous): Uh, Lisa...are you sure that is...well...s-safe? (gulps)
Lisa (nods): Lincoln, while some of my experiments have gone wrong in the past, I assure you that I got this one all under control. (lifts up beaker on the left and drips a few drops of said chemical into the other beaker)
(Suddenly, "BOOM!", an explosion sound effect goes off in the background and the 2nd beaker sprays white dry ice fog all over Lisa's face, creating the illusion of an explosion. After this "explosion" occurs, Lisa just has a stunned face, and the entire audience bursts out laughing. After about 30 seconds, the loud bursting of laughter from the entire audience dies down, and the opening musical number and scene continues to take place...)
Lisa: Hmmm...it appears that my calculations were a little bit off...
(At this moment, Lisa begins to sing her own lyrics to the opening musical number of the show...)
Lisa (singing): A day for me...
Is a day of science and mathematics...
A day for me,
Is doing chemistry experiments,
And some math equations...(places now-"burnt" beakers onto desk behind her and faces the audience again)
They say that science and math,
Is a useless major!
But, to me,
That person who says that,
Is very close-minded!
I might just be four years old,
But I'm a child prodigy in my mind...
My mind...
A very intelligent girl...
Intelligent girl...
A very smart kid...
Smart kid...
So science and math,
Is how I go and spend a day,
In a very loud family like mine!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln: Alright...so...I-I will see you later? (sheepishly walks back towards the lift side of the setting)
Lisa (nods): I suppose so, elder brother unit. Just...be careful on the way out. (turns back around)
Lincoln (nods) Okay then...(exits stage left)
(As Lincoln exits stage left, the large hallway wall panel from before comes back down in the center area of the stage again, concealing the entire setting behind it. As the hallway wall panel comes down into position, Lincoln exits out the door on the left, and closes said door behind him...)
Lincoln: And as you saw, my sister Lisa is a child prodigy! (smiles) Now, let's go meet some more of my siblings, alright? (nods) Yes, let's go! (walks over to the door in the middle) Behind this door are my six-year-old twin sisters Lana and Lola! (places hand on the doorknob) Lana is a HUGE fan of anything involving mechanics, fixing things, dirt, bugs, worms, and basically ANYTHING that is considered gross by other kids. And Lola, well, she's the polar opposite of Lana, as she's a HUGE princess fan, a pageant performer and winner, and loves dresses, tiaras, crowns, stuffed animals, tea parties, arts and crafts, and ANYTHING neat and tidy. But the downside to that is that...well...she's a little tough in terms of attitude at times. (opens door and steps through doorway) Let's go right in! (closes door behind her)
(As Lincoln closes the door behind him, the hallway wall panel rises up once again, revealing the setting of Lola and Lana's bedroom. This new setting includes a back wall panel painted grey with a window covered by a purple curtain in the center, 2 gray wall panels vertically placed on the far left and right side, Lola's stuff-animal-topped canopy bed with pink silk curtains on the right, a bedside table next to the front of the bed on the right, a display of tiaras on the wall next to Lola's bed on the left, a lush pink footstool in front of the bed, Lana's dirty looking bed on the right, a glass tarantula tank on a bedside table next to the front of Lana's bed on the right, a pile of dirty clothes in front of the end of the bed, and a display of several dirty hats on the wall next to the far end of the bed on the left. Lana is seen fixing the engine of Lola's drivable pink princess-themed toy jeep on the left, and Lola is seen seeing herself in a large oval-shaped mirror while smiling at herself in her usual dress outfit. The actress playing Lola is 8 years old and the actress playing Lana is 7 years old, to pull of the illusion of them both being 6-year-olds. As the hallway wall panel rises up out of view, Lincoln enters stage right, faces the entire audience, and begins to speak to the entire audience once again...)
Lincoln: So, let's go meet Lana and Lola, shall we?! (walks over to Lana) Hi Lana! (taps on her left shoulder)
Lana (looks up and turns around): Oh, hey Lincoln! (smiles and holds up wrench) I was just maintaining Lola's jeep here! What are you doing today, anyways?
Lincoln: Well, for starters, I'm singing an opening number for all of my friends...(gestures towards audience) and I...
Lola (interrupting Lincoln; gasps): Opening number?! (turns to face Lincoln) AN OPENING NUMBER!? (squeals with joy) OH BOY! OH BOY! OH BOY! (rushes over to where Lincoln is standing) Lincoln, you MUST let me sing a verse!
Lincoln (nervous): Uh...well...you see...(holds up an index finger)
Lola (interrupting Lincoln again): I GOT TO SING IN THIS SONG, LINCOLN! (faces the entire audience) Now, watch how a TRUE singer AND pageant winner sings an opening number!
Lincoln: Uh...(tugs on polo shirt collar) O-o-o-okay then...(sheepishly smiles)
Lola (nods and smiles): Thank you! (steps forward)
(At this point, Lola begins to sing her own verses to the opening musical number of the show...)
Lola (singing): Being a pageant winner,
Is all about being clean,
And perfect too...(clears throat)
Despite my roommate,
Being less than clean and sanitary...
Lana: HEY!
Lola (chuckles; singing): Lana relax,
That was only a joke,
And I really mean that!
Being a winner is a very big job,
You got to stay sparkling clean,
And wear only the best clothes!
Being like a princess is my life,
And that is the way I like it...like it...
The best thing I'm good at...good at...
And I look good in a dress...in a dress...
Any day of the week,
In a very loud family like mine! (steps back)
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lana rushes up to where Lola is standing, and the scene continues to occur...)
Lana (rushes over to where Lola is standing): Hey, my turn! I got a verse I want to sing, too!
Lincoln (smiles nervously): Oh, that's okay. I don't think that'll be...
Lana (interrupting Lincoln): Lincoln, relax! I got this! (steps forward and clears throat)
(At this point, Lana begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Lana (singing): My love for dirt,
And mechanics can gross people out sometimes!
My love for filth,
Caring for reptiles,
And other animals that most people,
Consider to be pests,
Is what I like to do!
My interests might be no to sanitary...
But who cares?!
Its what I like to do all the time!
Making mud pies,
And performing vehicle repairs,
Are some of the things that I like to do...to do...
On a typical day like this...like this...
Whether its sunny or rainy...sunny or rainy...
Any day of the week,
In a very loud family like this one! (steps back)
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln claps and speaks up once again...)
Lincoln (claps): Nice job, Lana!
Lola (clears throat): Ehem...(folds arms in front of her): And what about me?! (glares at Lincoln)
Lincoln (eyes widen): Oh! Y-Your verse was good too, Lola! (rubs the back of his neck and smiles sheepishly)
Lola (smiles): Good! I thought so! Now, I suggest you vacate our room, Lincoln. I got to prepare for an upcoming pageant!
Lana: And...I got to get back to the jeep repair...(walks back to the jeep's hood and goes back to repairing it)
Lincoln: O-okay then! See you both later! (exits stage left)
(As Lincoln exits stage left, the hallway wall panel comes back down in the center area of the stage again, concealing the entire setting behind it. As the hallway wall panel comes down into position, Lincoln exits out the door in the center, and closes the door behind him...)
Lincoln: Now, let's move on to this door over here on the right...(walks over to the door on the right side) Now, behind this door, is the bedroom of my 15-year-old sister Luna and my 14-year-old sister Luan! Luna is a rock music musician and fan and as for Luan...well, she's a comedian. Yes, she's all about jokes, pranks, and playing with a ventriloquist dummy of hers. We'll go meet them but...be careful around Luan. Sometimes, her pranks can REALLY get on your nerves! (opens door and steps through doorway) Well, let's go inside and meet Luna and Luan! (closes door behind him)
(As Lincoln closes the door behind him, the hallway wall panel rises up once again, revealing the setting of Luna and Luan's bedroom. This new setting a dark blue back wall panel with a window covered by a yellow curtain in the center, 2 dark blue wall panels vertically placed on the far left and right side, a bunk bed on the left, a bedside table with an alarm clock and a table lamp next to the front of the bed on the right, a "Battle of The Bands" poster displayed on the back wall panel next to the upper part of the bunk bed on the right, a small stack of music records and a record player on a stool next to the bedside table on the right, an electric guitar stand and amplifier next to the back end of the bunk bed on the right, a 3-layer dresser drawer with an oval-shaped mirror on the left, a small 1-foot-fall semicircular-shaped brick stage with a rectangular shaped brick wall area on the left vertical-facing side wall panel, a microphone on a metal microphone stand on stop of said stage, and several comedy-themed posters displayed on the left vertical-facing side wall panel around the brick wall area. Luna is on the right side of the setting, playing with her electric guitar while the actress playing Luan is nowhere to be seen. The actress playing Luna is played by a 15-year-old, luckily the same age as her cartoon counterpart from the "Loud House" cartoon, and the actress playing Luan is played by a 13-year-old. As the hallway wall panel rises up out of view, Lincoln enters stage right, faces the entire audience, and begins to speak to the entire audience once again...)
Lincoln: And over here on the right...(looks over on the right side of the setting) is my sister Luna! As I said just now, she's a rock star all the time! She loves rock music! And as for Luan...(looks left and right) well...(shrugs) I don't see her in sight. (shrugs) Oh well, its no big deal. I guess we'll meet her later...
Luna (looks up from her electric guitar): Oh, hey Lincoln bro! You hanging out with your friends?!
Lincoln (looks over at Luna): Yeah, I am! And I'm also doing an opening number!
Luna (walks over to where Lincoln is standing): An OPENINH NUMBER?! Lincoln, bro, you got to let me add a rock verse to it! (strums her electric guitar)
Lincoln (nervous): Oh, uh...(rubs the back of his neck) I don't know if my friends would...
Luna (interrupting Lincoln): Oh, I'm sure they would LOVE a rock music verse!
Lincoln (still nervous): Uh...
Luna: GREAT! (strums her electric guitar again) Here I go...
(Suddenly, the uplifting music stops playing in the background and changes to rock music. As it does, Luna begins to sing her verses to of the first musical number of the show, all while playing her electric guitar...)
Luna (singing): Rocking...rocking,
Rock and roll!
Rocking...rocking,
Rock and roll!
Rock is my favorite type of music,
The best out there to me,
Full of energy, electricity,
And of course, lots of power!
I love rocking my guitar,
Singing very loud,
And of course, writing up my own.
Rocking music material!
Rock music is very cool,
Rad as well, and electrifying...
I love rock music,
And of course...NOTHING ELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLSE!
Rock music is the best out there!
The best out there,
And nothing else is just as good!
I love to rock...rock and roll,
Yes, rock and roll!
Rock music is the best out there!
A shot of adrenaline,
In every single not!
I love to rock...rock and roll,
Yes, rock and roll!
Rocking is part of my life...
A part of my life,
That will never change!
I love to rock...rock and roll,
Yes, rock and roll!
Rocking and rolling, and rocking...
Yeah, rocking and rolling, and rocking...
Rocking, rock and roll,
YEAH! Rock and roll,
Yeah! ROCK AND ROLL! (strums final notes on electric guitar)
(Suddenly, the rock music playing in the background changes back into the previous uplifting music. As it does, said uplifting music continues to play in the background, and the rest of the scene continues to take place...)
Lincoln: Wow...that was actually very entertaining, Luna! (holds out fist for a fist-bump)
Luna (smiles and gives Lincoln a fist-bump): Right on, dude!
Lincoln: Save, have you seen Luan anywhere? (scratches the top of his head)
Luna (shrugs): No idea where she is, bro. But I'm sure you'll run into her.
Lincoln (nods): Alright, I'll just come back later...(faces the entire audience) Now, as you can see, Luna really has a passion for rock music. After seeing her first rock concert featuring band singer Mick Swagger when she was 9, she has been a pure rock musician ever since! And as for Luan she's...
(Suddenly, before Lincoln can say anything else, Luan's ventriloquist dummy, Mr. Coconuts, pops out of the conductor's hole of the orchestra pit, facing the entire audience, controlled of course, by Luan, who's holding him by the back and is hidden in the space beneath the conductor's hole of the orchestra's pit. As Mr. Coconuts appears, "he" begins to "speak" to the entire audience via Luan controlling his mouth opening and closing, as well as his voice...)
Mr. Coconuts: Hello everyone! Say, did you know I'm an artist? Because it seems that I can really draw a crowd! (laughs) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Get it?! "Draw" a crowd?! (laughs again) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
(The entire audience bursts out laughing over Mr. Coconut's first appearance and joke. After about 30 seconds, the loud bursts of laughter die down. As they do, the rest of the scene continues to take place...)
Lincoln (notices Luan's antics; sighs): And...that is Luan's ventriloquist dummy, Mr. Coconuts. She made him herself and sometimes, it can get REALLY annoying when she brings him out, along with her long never-ending list of puns. I'm actually surprised that you all laughed at that just now...(shrugs) Different sense of humor, I guess...
Mr. Coconuts (nods): Yes, yes, laugh all you like. I got all the time in the world! Say, did you hear about the crook who stole a calendar? He got twelve months! (laughs)
(The entire audience bursts out laughing over Mr. Coconut's second joke. After about 30 seconds, the loud bursts of laughter die down. As they do, the rest of the scene continues to take place once again...)
Lincoln (sighs): Alright Luan, every funny...(looks unamused) Come on out from there...
Luan (steps up out of the orchestra pit and onto the stage, still holding Mr. Coconuts in one arm): Oh Lincoln, you party pooper! (walks over to where Lincoln is) I'm sure your friends wouldn't mind a sprinkle of comedy! (operates Mr. Coconuts while using his voice) Yeah, be flexible like a wad of silly putty, Lincoln! (stops using Mr. Coconuts and uses her regular voice again) Say, I see you're doing an opening musical number!
Lincoln (nods): Yeah, I was, and now, I...
Luan (interrupting Lincoln): So, in celebration of that, I think its time I provide a little complimentary comedy verse!
Lincoln (holds out hands in front of him): Oh, uh, that's okay, Luan. I-I-I don't think that'll be necessary...
Luan (interrupting Lincoln again): And here I go...(faces the entire audience along with Mr. Coconuts and steps forward)
(At this point, Luan begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Luan (singing): Comedy, and clowning around,
Is my only specialty!
I love making puns,
Playing with Mr. Coconuts,
And pranking my family...
Often and every April Fools Day!
They say that pranking people can be,
A very mean thing to do!
HA! Who would say that?!
Probably some guy,
With no sense of humor!
Humor is my love,
And I will never go and give it up...give it up...
I will continue to do it...do it...
Making people laugh...people laugh...
I love making people laugh,
And tell my puns,
In my very loud and large family!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln (rubs the back of his neck): T-thank you Luan! Now, if you'll excuse me, I...
Luan (interrupting Lincoln again): Wait, I got a VERY special trick to show all of your friends! (smiles)
Lincoln (perks up): Oh, you do? (puts hands on his hips and smiles) And what's that?
Luan (chuckles): Well...(puts free hand close to the fake flower on her shirt and uses 2 fingers to grip the sides of it) its THIS! (squeezes fake flower, causing a small amount of water to squirt onto Lincoln's face)
Lincoln (gets squirted on in the face): AAAAAHHHH! (falls over backwards)
Luan (laughs): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (points at Lincoln): You fall for that one every time! (laughs) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Lincoln (huffs): Very funny, Luan! (gets back up) Very funny!
Luna (shakes her head): Sorry you had to deal with that, bro...(walks over to Lincoln) But I think this will help. (pulls out a small purple rag from behind her and hands it to Lincoln): Here you go, bro...I think you'll need this.
Lincoln (sighs and nods): Of course...(uses rag to dry his face) Thanks...(hands rag back to Luna)
Luna (takes rag back): No problem, dude! (steps back to where she was before)
Lincoln (shakes head): Anyways, I better get going! (waves to both Luan and Luna) Bye! (exits stage left)
Luan (shakes head): Mr. Coconuts, Lincoln needs to grow a sense of humor! (operates Mr. Coconuts while using his voice again) He sure does. Say, speaking of growing stuff, why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing! (laughs) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (stops using Mr. Coconuts and uses her regular voice again) Oh, good one, Mr. Coconuts! (laughs) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
(As Lincoln exits stage right and Luan laughs at the joke, the hallway wall panel comes back down in the center area of the stage once again, concealing the setting behind it. As the hallway wall panel comes down into position, Lincoln exits out the door on the right, and closes the door behind him...)
Lincoln: And that is just only six of my 10 sisters in my large family! But there are still four more sister left that I'd like you to meet! Since its a Saturday morning right now, usually my sisters are either in their rooms partaking in their own hobbies before breakfast, or they're outside their rooms partaking in their hobbies in the hallway, living room, and any other room in the house except for the kitchen and the bathroom we share. (sighs) And yes, in case you ask, there is only ONE bathroom that we all have to share! But now, enough about that! Let's go downstairs and...
(Suddenly, before Lincoln could say anything else, the actress playing Lucy Loud (an actual 8-year-old) enters stage left, and speaks up, surprising Lincoln in the process...)
Lucy (enters stage left; speaks in depressed tone of voice): Hi Lincoln...
Lincoln (shocked): AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! (turns to the left and notices Lucy) L-Lucy! (sighs in relief) You...you startled me!
Lucy (sighs): Sorry Lincoln...(walks over to where Lincoln is standing) I was just on my way back to my room to spend more time in darkness...(sighs and notices the entire audience) Are these some friends of yours from the outside world?
Lincoln (nods): Yes, they are, and I...
Lucy (sighs): May I tell them all a little about myself?
Lincoln (looks nervous): I don't know about that...(rubs the back of his neck) You see, I...
Lucy (interrupting Lincoln): It'll only be a minute, Lincoln...(steps forward)
(At this point, Lucy begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Lucy (singing): Darkness for me,
Is like my happy place,
Where I'm the most calm and satisfied...
Gothic poetry, darkness, and vampires,
Are most of my interests!
Oh course, there is also dressing in mainly black,
Playing an organ piano,
And caring for my pet bat, Fangs!
These interests might seem scary,
But they satisfy me always...always...
I like these hobbies of mine...hobbies of mine...
No one light shine onto me...onto me...
These are my dark interests,
That help me survive a day,
In a very loud family like mine!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln (eyes widen): That was...c-creepy, Lucy.
Lucy (sighs and smiles): Ah, thank you Lincoln. Its what I was intending...
Lincoln: O-Okay, then...hehehe...(rubs the back of his neck) Well, I better go introduce my friends to the others. (smiles nervously)
Lucy (nods): Of course, Lincoln...do what you must as your time and everyone else's on Earth...is limited and ends with a death date. (exits stage left)
Lincoln (shivers): Ooooh...sometimes, she gives me the creeps sometimes...(stops shivering) But, she's my sister and...well...(shrugs) I can't do anything about that. (shakes head) Anyways, moving on, we'll head downstairs and see the rest of my family! (exits stage right)
(As Lincoln exits stage right, another set transition begins, as the hallway wall panel rises up, revealing the entire setting of the living room of the Loud family, perfectly resembling the living room right from the cartoon. This living room setting includes a beige back wall panel with an open doorway in the center with a dark background filling said doorway, a beige vertical-facing wall panel over on the left with a fireplace and mantelpiece with several framed photos displayed on it, a stairway on the right side, and of course, next to said stairway, a 2nd beige vertical-facing wall panel over on the right with a large wide open wide-rimmed passageway leading to the dinning room. As the hallway wall panel rises out of view and reveals the living room setting, a wooden entertainment system chest with a flat-screen TV set with a DVD player and a video game console diagonally-positioned to the left slides into view on the left side of the stage. As it does, a dark blue sofa, a dark blue armchair next to the sofa on the right, a coffee table in front of the sofa, a small table with a table lamp in between the sofa and armchair on the right, and a floor standing lamp next to the sofa on the left all rise up into view in the center area of the stage via a sliding trapdoor and hydraulic lift. As it does, the set transition completes, and Lincoln enters the living room setting by walking down the stairs and making his way down onto the floor. As he does this, the actress playing Lori (an actual 17-year-old) is seeing sitting on the couch, using her cellphone to update her social media page. As Lincoln steps onto the floor, he continues to speak to the audience once again...)
Lincoln: Now, this is the Loud family's living room! Now yes, it is hard all sharing one TV set most of the time, but we manage to do so somehow. Now...(turns to the right and sees Lori) Now, this is my oldest sister, Lori! She was the first one born in the family, and she is the oldest at seventeen years old! And as for her hobbies, she's a golfer and is VERY skilled at the sport! And despite the fact that she sometimes comes off as a short-tempered teenager who is condescending towards her younger siblings sometimes, she cares deeply about this family.
Lori (looks up from her phone): I sometimes come off as WHAT?! (glares angrily at Lincoln)
Lincoln: Oh...uh...(rubs the back of his neck) N-N-N-N-Nothing, L-Lori! (smiles nervously) You come off as...well...a g-great l-loving and c-caring sister!
Lori: Oh...(smiles) alright then! (goes back to using her phone) And who were you talking to anyways?
Lincoln: Oh, hehe...no one important. Just my friends and...
Lori (looks up from her phone; interrupting Lincoln): Oh, well in that case...(looks at the entire audience) Hello there! (stands up) I'm Lori Loud and I would love to tell you about myself!
Lincoln: Oh, L-Lori, I don't think that will be necessary...
Lori (interrupting Lincoln again): Lincoln, I got this! (steps forward and stands on top of coffee table)
(At this point, Lori begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Lori (singing): A day in my life,
Includes using my phone here,
And checking my "Twitter" page!
I also play golf...
And I want to be a CEO or co-CEO,
Of a major corporation,
When I grow up in the future!
Some people say I have a short-temper fuse!
But I don't think so,
As its more like tough-love to me!
I'm the oldest kid here,
And I love being put in charge...in charge..
And I like playing golf...playing golf...
And I have a huge goal in my life...my life...
And that is what I do,
On a typical day,
In a very loud family like mine! (steps down off of the coffee table)
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln (faces the entire audience): And that is my eldest sister Lori, everyone! (steps forward) Now, I also have a sister named Lynn Jr. She's thirteen years old, and she's a...
(Suddenly, before Lincoln, can finish his sentence, the actress playing Lynn Jr (played by a 12-year-old) suddenly appears on the highest visible step on the stairway, holding a football in her hands. She grins as she makes her appearance, stays on the highest step, bends her knees, and calls out to Lincoln by surprise...)
Lynn Jr: Go long, bro!
Lincoln (surprised; widens eyes): Huh? (turns around to see Lynn Jr)
Lynn Jr: I said, go long, bro! (tosses football)
Lincoln (gasps; holds arms above his head): I got it! (jumps up and catches football)
Lynn Jr: And Lincoln catches the ball!
Lincoln (falls backwards upon landing back on his feet): Ow! (stands back up) Lynn, you startled me by doing that!
Lynn Jr (walks downstairs): Hey, you were a great catcher, though!
Lincoln (chuckles): Yeah, I guess so...(faces the entire audience again) As I was saying, this is Lynn Jr, another one of my sisters! She's thirteen, and she's a HUGE sports fan! Yep, she loves all sports, and enjoys not only playing sports, but also watching them on TV!
Lynn Jr (notices the entire audience): Oh, are these your friends, Lincoln?
Lincoln (nods): Yes, they are. Now, as I was saying, Lynn Jr is...
Lynn Jr (interrupting Lincoln): Oh, let me tell your friends about myself, Lincoln!
Lincoln (rubs the back of my neck): Uh...a-alright then!
Lynn Jr: Wonderful! (steps forward)
(At this point, Lynn Jr begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Lynn Jr (singing): I love all sports,
Such as basketball, soccer,
Tennis, and baseball, too!
Also swimming, jump rope, and playing board games,
And even lacrosse and volleyball as well!
I'm very athletic to everyone around me,
And of course, they'd be right,
Because I NEVER lose!
Winning is my game,
And I will continue to win forever...win forever...
And win medals and trophies...medals and trophies...
Other teams loose to me...loose to me...
And I still win nonstop,
And enjoying sports,
Is what I do on a typical day,
In a very loud family like mine!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln: Right...um...thanks for that Lynn, but please don't gloat about it too much...(sheepishly smiles)
Lynn Jr (scoffs): The reason I do that is because no one can take it whenever I win and they loose! (tosses football into the air, does a backflip, and catches the football with her ankles, before landing on her back while using her hands to cushion the fall) TA-DA! (gets
(The entire audience claps very loudly over Lynn Jr's suddenly football-catching trick. After about 30 seconds, the loud clapping from the entire audience dies down, and the rest of the scene continues to take place...)
Lynn Jr (gets up): Well, I better go upstairs and freshen up! See you later, bro! (runs back upstairs)
Lincoln (sighs and faces the entire audience again): And as you can see, Lynn Jr is a great sports fan, but she's EXTREMELY competitive at times. Whenever she wins a game, she gloats about it and makes everyone who lost the game either annoyed at her, or feeling bad that they lost. (shakes head) Anyways, there is one more sister I'd like you to meet. Her name is Leni, and she's sixteen years old. And her interests are...
(Suddenly, before Lincoln can finish his sentence, the actress playing Leni (a 17-year-old) rushes downstairs and into the living room setting, holding a green dress in one hand, and a red dress in her other hand. As she came into view, she was panicking about something...)
Leni (holding up both dresses): Oh my gosh, what am I going to do?!
Lincoln: Oh, Hey Leni! (smiles)
Leni: Ugh, this is NOT a good time, Lincoln!
Lincoln: Oh...uh...(scratches the top of his head) Sorry, Leni. What is the problem?
Leni: I'm trying to figure out what dress needs alternations to it more! (holds out red dress) This one could use some alternating towards the bottom...(holds out green dress) But at the same time, this one could use some sleeve adjustments! Oh, this is NOT a good day for me! (steps forward)
(At this point, Leni begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Leni (singing): Oh my gosh, what a bad day,
For me this morning...this morning...
I have two dresses,
And I can't decide which ones need alterations...alterations...
As a girl who wants a future fashion designer career,
As a girl who is also good at wood carving, singing,
Lock-picking, and making smoothies...
This is not something,
That I should be struggling with at all!
I just want to be satisficed,
With my dress alteration choice!
That is all that I want,
And once I get that,
I can get through another day,
In the very loud family,
That I' am a part of! (steps back)
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln (rubs chin): Hmmm...perhaps maybe...I can be of some assistance? (stops rubbing his chin)
Leni (suddenly smiles and nods): Oh YES! That would be a HUGE help to me! (turns to face Lincoln) So, which one should I make alterations to today, Lincoln? (holds out both dresses for Lincoln to see)
Lincoln (folds arms in front of him) Hmmm...(carefully studies both dresses) Well Leni, if I must be honest here...(points to green dress) I say that working on making alterations to the green dress would be a great idea for today! (smiles)
Leni (sighs in relief): Oh, thanks Lincoln! (turns around) Now, to get to work on it! (goes upstairs and disappears from view)
Lincoln (lowers arms and places his hands on his hips): And that was all ten of my sisters, each one with their own personalities, skills, and interests too! Now, a family wouldn't be complete without a mother or father, so let's meet my parents, shall we?
(Suddenly, an actress playing Mrs. Rita Loud enters stage right, holding a small stack of papers and a pencil in her hands...)
Rita (enters stage right): Ugh, I can't figure out what to write for a novel! (notices Lincoln) Oh, good morning, Lincoln! (smiles) Breakfast is almost ready. Your father is making pancakes today! (taps the top of her head with the pencil) But as for me, I'm having writer's block...again!
Lincoln (looks up at his mother): Oh, good morning, mom! (faces the entire audience again) This is my mom, Mrs. Rita Loud. But of course, we all call her "Mom"! Before she met my dad, she was a crossing guard. Now, she's a full-time dental assistant, but her REAL dream is to become a novelist! But...sometimes, as you can see...she gets writer's block a lot, and she can never find a creative side in terms of writing a great and complex story. But, despite this flaw of hers, she's still the best mother that we've ever had!
Rita (sighs): Oh...why can't I come up with a storyline?! (walks over to the left) Why is it so hard for me?! (stands in front of the coffee table and faces the entire audience)
(At this point, Rita begins to sing her own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Rita (singing): I just want to write...
I want to write a novel,
And become a well-known novelist!
I'm a mother by day and night...
And a full-time dental assistant by day for an occupation!
I used to be a simple crossing guard...
But now, that is all in the past,
And now I'm a mother,
Of eleven children!
But every single day,
I struggle to get out of my writer's block...writer's block...
I can't come up with a novel storyline...storyline...
And I just want to figure out...figure out...
A good plot for a novel,
To soon get out there and publish it!
And I struggle with writing daily,
In the very loud family I'm in!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln (faces Rita): Oh mom, don't put yourself down! I'm sure you'll think of a novel sooner or later! (smiles reassuringly)
Rita (sighs and smiles): Thanks son...but I'm still struggling on it. It might be a while before I have a novel idea in place. (exits stage right)
Lincoln (faces the entire audience): And despite my mom's lack of creative novel ideas, I still support her. (smiles) And now, let's talk about the other parent in my family and the final family member who completes this large family of thirteen people...my father! My father is named Mr. Lynn Sr Loud, and there's ONE thing that EVERYONE in our family agrees on...he is a...
(Suddenly, before Lincoln can finish his sentence, an actor playing Lynn Sr enters stage right, wearing a white apron and chef's hat, and holding a large platter of stacks of plain pancakes and chocolate chip pancakes in one hand and a spatula in the other hand...)
Lynn Sr (enters stage right): Well, breakfast is almost ready! I got the bacon on the stove and the fried potatoes in the oven! And these pancakes...wow, I feel like I've made these hundreds of times! Oh wait, I DID make them hundreds of times! (chuckles) Boy, I'm so good at cooking! (sees Lincoln) Oh, good morning, son!
Lincoln (looks up at Lynn Sr): Good morning, dad! (smells the pancakes) Man, those sure do smell good!
Lynn Sr (nods): You know it, son! My breakfast-cooking skills are unmatchable by any chef out there, and by any breakfast restaurant chain, of course!
Lincoln (chuckles): You got that right, dad!
Lynn Sr (nods): Yep! To me, cooking is how I enjoy a typical day in the Loud House! (walks over to the center of the living room setting) I mean...its my natural skill! (stands in front of coffee table and steps forward)
(At this point, Lynn Sr begins to sing his own verse of the opening musical number of the show...)
Lynn Sr (singing): I love cooking...
Everything from pancakes, muffins, and layer cakes!
Cooking is my skill,
And I love making everything from soups, to pasta, and fried dish!
Beef wellington...and steak rounds are also my specialty...
I also make cream Brule, as well as chocolate mouse,
Baked duck, and even goulash!
They say cooking is something that is just for girls!
Ha! They are wrong,
And I know men can do it too!
I'm very good at cooking,
And its my favorite skill of all...of all...
I love cooking for my family...family...
I could open a restaurant one day...one day...
And cooking is what I like to do,
On a typical day,
In my very loud and large family!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lincoln speaks up once again...)
Lincoln: So dad, is breakfast almost ready? I'm starving this morning! (smiles)
Lynn Sr (nods): In a minute son! Speaking of breakfast, I better go back and check on those potatoes and bacon! (exits stage right)
Lincoln: Alright dad! (faces the entire audience again) And that is basically my entire family! Together, we are all a large family of thirteen people! And yes, it sometimes is hard to live in a family with ten sisters, especially when we have only one bathroom and one TV to share, but we still manage! And of course, sometimes we fight and get into trouble, but hey...(shrugs) everyone does that from time to time! Its just what makes us normal like another family out there! (steps forward) After all, we have have flaws and no one is perfect!
(At this point, Lincoln begins to sing more of the opening musical number of the show...)
Lincoln (singing): Sometimes my siblings drive me crazy at times,
And sometimes I just can't get...
A moment of needed peace and quiet.
My siblings always run around,
And argue with each other...
Or get into situations beyond their control! (steps back)
I do my best to help them all out...
Because I care about them,
Since they're my own flesh an blood!
But once in a while,
They push me around at times...
They sometimes drive me crazy...
And its all part of a day,
In a very large and loud family like mine! (stands up on coffee table)
However...all I want sometimes,
Is some gratitude...
Or one-on-one attention,
Between me and my mom and dad!
All without my sisters,
Interrupting me and them...
How come I haven't gone insane? (steps own off of coffee table)
But that's just my life,
In a very large and loud family like mine!
(As the uplifting music continues to play in the background, Lynn Sr suddenly calls out from offstage on the right side...)
Lynn Sr (offstage): KIDS, COME DOWNSTAIRS NOW! ITS BREAKFAST TIME!
Lori (puts phone away in her pocket and sits up): Breakfast time?! (jumps up) YES! Boy, I'm so hungry!
Lincoln (eyes widen): Oh no...everyone, get prepared for a stampede!
(And suddenly, as the uplifting music in the background continues to play in the background, it keys up a lot. As it does, Lisa, Lana, Lola, Luan, Luna, Lucy, Lynn Jr, and Leni (carrying an animatronic of Lily), all rush downstairs and into the living room setting. As they do, Lincoln moves to the left side of the stairway fast, and Lori rushes over to join the rest of the sisters. As she does, Lincoln and all 10 sisters begin to dance around living room setting, and sing the final verse of the very first musical number of the show...)
All Loud Sisters (singing): In the Loud House...
This is our home,
Where we all live togeeeeeeether!
In the Loud House,
HEY! We live together,
And mostly get aloooooooooong!
However, sometimes we get into arguments,
Disagreements and disputes,
And other small hiccups like that!
But its all okay,
And no big deal...
In a very loud family...
A loud family...
A loud family...
Lisa (singing): A family that's caring...
Lola (singing): Loving...
Lana (singing): Very large...
Lucy (singing): Responsible...
Lynn Jr (singing): Crowded...
Luan (singing): Chaotic...
Luna (singing): Busy...
Leni (singing): Varied...
Lori (singing): Exceptional...
Lincoln (singing): And of course...
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUD!
Loud Sisters and Lincoln (singing): YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!
YEAH, OH YEAH!
We are the Loud House, yeah!
And are part of this,
Very large and loud...
FAMILYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
(Suddenly, as the Loud sisters and Lincoln stop dancing and freeze in various positions facing the entire audience, the uplifting music stops playing in the background, ending the very first musical number of the show. As it does, the entire audience cheers and claps very loudly for such a great opening musical number to the show. After about 30 seconds, the loud cheering and clapping from the entire audience dies down, and the scene continues to take place...)
Rita (enters stage right): Kids, hurry up! You don't want breakfast to get cold! (exits stage right)
Lynn Sr (offstage): Your mother is right, kids! And today, I made chocolate chip pancakes!
Loud Sisters and Lincoln (gasp): CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES?!
Lynn Jr (runs to the right side of the stage): I CALL DIPS ON ALL OF THE CHOCOLATE CHIP PANCAKES! (exits stage right)
Lola: Oh no, you don't! (runs after Lynn Jr also exiting stage right)
Lincoln: WAIT FOR ME! (runs after Lola and also exits stage right)
Lisa (sighs): Chocolate chips...why must my male parental unit put something considered "unhealthy" into a "somewhat healthy" breakfast like pancakes? (shakes head) Oh well, I suppose I can enjoy the potatoes and bacon though...as long as no chocolate has been added to it. (runs after Lincoln and also exits stage right too)
Lana: OH YES! I LOVE MESSY, GOOEY, AND STICKY CHOCOLATE CHIPS IN THE PANCAKES! I can't wait to have a messy breakfast! (runs after Lisa, exiting stage right next)
Lily: Poo Poo! (waves arms around wildly)
Leni (chuckles): Yes Lily, breakfast is ready you sweet thing! (exits stage right while carefully still holding Lily in her arms)
Luna: Ah yes, nothing like a good breakfast before ROCKING AND ROLLING! (exits stage right, following Leni)
(As Luna also goes and exits stage right, all the other Loud sisters run after her, all exiting stage right in the process while cheering about the breakfast they are about to enjoy. As they do, the stage lights shinning over the front and center area of the stage dim. As they do, transitional music begins to play in the background. As it does, another set transition begins to take place. As it does, the sofa, armchair, coffee table, small table with table lamp, and the standing lamp all disappear below the stage via sliding trapdoor and hydraulic lift. As this occurs, the flat-screen TV set with a DVD player and a video game console diagonally-positioned on the left slides out of view on the left side of the stage. As it does, a large wall panel painted to resemble a cloudless light-blue sky comes down in the center area of the stage, concealing the entire living room setting behind said wall panel. As the wall panel comes down into position, an additional wall panel resembling the front wall of the house's front exterior side (complete with an front open-air/covered porch in front of the house panel's front side) comes down at least a foot in front of said first wall panel (complete with side covering resembling the sides of the house to help pull off the illusion of a house's exterior being shown), positioning itself in the center of the first wall panel. As the 2nd wall panel comes down into view, another wall panel resembling the front of the garage comes down into view on the right side. As it gets into position, a small metal backyard gate slides into view in between the left side of the garage panel and the right side of the house's front side, sliding out of a small and slim hole on the side of the house panel's front side on the right. Once the metal gate is in position, a large structure resembling a tall and thick realistic-looking tree slides into view on the left, complete with a rope swing hanging from a branch on the right, a few arrows sticking out of the left side, and a white toy airplane stuck in the tree's bushy leaves and tall branches up on top. As the tree gets into position, the stage lights shinning above the front and center area of the stage come back on. As they do, the transitional music stops playing in the background, and the set transition completes. As it does, some sound effects of birds chirping begin to be heard in the background, and the next scene of the musical begins to take place...)
And that was the conclusion of Scene 1 of Act 1 of this brand-new Broadway musical script story of mine! It seems we had a great introduction to Lincoln Loud himself and his entire family, including his parents and 10 sisters. And, we all got to see each of the family members' hobbies, interests and skills, in song form of course! This musical number featured within this musical's first scene was based off not one but two real-life songs, which are "Bikini Bottom Day" from "SpongeBob SquarePants: The Musical" and "We Rock" from the "Disney Channel" original musical movie, "Camp Rock" (yes, its not a stage musical, but it might as well be). And now that the Loud family has been introduced, let's see where this show goes on from here! Well, its time for us all to move on to Scene 1 of Act 1 of this brand-new Broadway musical script story of mine!