People are Troublesome

Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine.

Empty wrappers all over the floor, cans by the sink and a large bundle of blankets on the sofa. A bundle that was letting out occasional groans. Every now and then an arm snaked out and pulled in the pieces of food that had been cleverly left within grabbing distance.

I suck. I'm stupid! I'm a fuckin' dumbass! Such was the monologue going on in Hidan's head. He was one of those people who struggled to stop himself losing his grip on sanity when anxious. Probably he should be at school but that would be sensible. And Shikamaru was here. Suddenly very scary Shikamaru. It was safer in here. At least, that was what he had thought.

The doorbell rang. The being in the bundle jerked at the sudden sound and then went still. Human contact? He wasn't prepared for that! Perhaps it would be someone trying to sell him something. Or Sasori come to yell at him. Or… No. He was staying in his bundle. Maybe they would go away if he stayed in the safety bundle.

The doorbell sounded a couple more times and then there was a long pause. And then someone was knocking on his door. Whoever they were, they were damn persistent.

"Hidan? You in there? You're not dead right?" Is that the blonde bastard? Slowly Hidan poked his head out of his hiding place and glared at the door. His hair was all over the damn place and his eyes were bleary. "Shit! Do I need to call an ambulance?" What the fuck does he think I'd do?

If he didn't do something about this then he would probably have a load of people trying to break down his front door so he untangled himself from the blankets and dragged his half-dressed body to the door. He opened it to a frantic Naruto who was rapidly scrolling through his phone.

"You're alive!"

"Of course I'm alive you dumbshit!" He wouldn't kill himself over what had happened. He would just wallow in self-pity for a while.

"I was worried! 'Cause Shika was acting weird and you were gone so I thought something bad had happened. And…" Naruto stared at him. "Oh god, you look terrible!"

"Well fuck you too." He didn't need a mirror to know this, he already knew. All he'd been doing was moping that he ruined the closest relationship he'd had in years.

"Could I come in?"

"If you want." He didn't feel like refusing after being bored and alone for so long. Naruto moved past him and paused upon seeing the mess everywhere.

"You've… had fun?"

"Ugh." Hidan went back to the safety of his bundle.

"So what happened?"

"Stuff."

"Umm… You want to add more to that?" He could hear that Naruto was right next to him.

"No,"

"You sure? It does help to talk about stuff."

"…" It was the only thing he hadn't tried so far; mainly because he hadn't had anyone to talk to, but you know… "You won't say anythin'? Or laugh?"

"Promise."

"I fuckin' kissed the bastard! And then I ran for it. How's that?" There was silence.

"So you have a thing for Shikamaru?"

"Yeah…" He wasn't sure why since Shikamaru seemed a weird type but then he himself was weird so he needed someone that matched.

"Ahh… That's really obvious now that I think about it."

"It is?" He peered out of the blankets.

"You do act differently when you're around him. And you watch him a lot…"

"Ugh." Hidan retreated back in.

"What did he say?"

"Nothin'."

"You should probably talk to him."

"I'm kinda… I don't wanna." He pouted like a child.

"But it might make you feel better?"

"Nn."

"Then… How about a beer?"

"I've had enough." Never had he thought he would think that.

"You sure?" He could hear a sound like a can being shaken. He did already feel like his head had been run over by a car…

"Guess I could have one…"

Six beers later and Hidan had thrown all the blankets on the floor and was lying across Naruto, going into a full speech.

"You know what? This pisses me off! Why do I have ta be so stupid?" Naruto was also a little far gone.

"You ain't stupid! You're a great guy! Shika's stupid! He should be over here telling ya how awesome ya are!"

"You think so?"

"Yeah!"

"But what if he don't like me?" Hidan pouted.

"He keeps talking to you! And seeing you all the time! He doesn't normally do that!"

"He doesn't?" He should have known this. He watched him a lot.

"No! You should go get your man!"

"You're right! I should!" Hidan threw him can down and started pulling on anything he could find that was clean.

"Yeah! Go for it! I'll be cheering for ya!"

"Thanks man!" This Naruto was great. He had to be around him more often.

-Page Break-

His head hurt. His tongue was made of sandpaper. Alcohol was the piss of the devil and he had drank way too much of it last night. Indeed, he wasn't sure where he was exactly. The smell gave it away before anything else. And with the smell came a few hazy memories that were enough to make him cringe.

Oh… Oh. Shit. Shit. Shit! He had climbed in through a window. Who did that?! Aside from him and all his weirdness. And now he was in Shikamaru's bed and had probably made a complete twat of himself. He had to sneak out or something. Alas, whenever he moved, his head felt like it would split in half.

The door creaked open and he stayed still in the hope that Shikamaru would think he was still asleep. There was a hesitation and then somebody stepped lightly across the carpet.

"Hidan?" He had not been expecting direct contact.

"…Nn…"

"You want breakfast?"

"Nn…."

"Great… I'll do that."

Both of them sat awkwardly at either end of the bed and eating a plateful of fried food was not an overly fun way of spending the morning. Neither could think of anything to say since Hidan was currently trying not to panic and Shikamaru seemed to be deep in thought.

After stuffing himself with food, Hidan did feel a little more clear-headed but no less embarrassed. He wasn't in the mood for discussing this and so he was going to fall back on his old coping mechanism and shoved the duvet back over his head.

"What are you doing?"

"Hidin'."

"Oh…."

He needs to get out of here so I can get out of the damn window. Shikamaru was still hovering around for some reason and it was getting him anxious. He didn't want to listen to someone turning him down so he was willing him away. Although he shifted on the bed, he didn't actually leave the room. It was weird. He hadn't exactly tried to go after him while he had been away from school.

"Umm…" Is he tryin' to talk to me? Shit. I know what this is gonna be about. I can't talk about that! "Are you gonna stay under there?"

"Until ya leave the room."

"Oh. I'm not going anywhere anytime soon."

"What?! So I have to stay under here?!"

"You can come out."

"No I can't!" Maybe he already had but that was for food. That was an exception.

"Why?"

"I don't wanna hear what you're gonna say!"

"I listened to what you had to say." He had him there.

After dragging it out for as long as was reasonable, Hidan pulled the duvet from his head and sat up, trying to look more human than he felt right now. He couldn't really look at Shikamaru so he had no idea what he was going to say. For a long time they were both sitting in silence. Until Hidan got twitchy.

"Are you fuckin' done yet? Just put me out of misery!"

"Um…" So even he couldn't work out what he was gonna say. "Did you hear what I said last night?"

"Which thing?" He remembered some of the nicer things like the fact that he wasn't pathetic. It wasn't true but it had been a kind thing to say.

"What I said before you fell asleep." Hidan pondered…. Nothing was coming immediately to mind. He had a vague idea that something had been said but he couldn't quite work it out.

"What did ya say?" His heart rate was increasing, especially when he saw how embarrassed Shikamaru was looking.

"Umm… I think… I think it might be mutual." Oh. Oh. Well he wasn't going to get away with this vagueness. He hadn't been allowed to.

"What was that? Tell me this shit in exact words." Hidan was leaning forward and staring into his face, a lot of his fears starting to melt away. Shikamaru was looking scared.

"I think I might like you…" It was quiet but he heard it.

"Tell me again!" Shikamaru glared.

"I love you! I think…" Shikamaru rubbed the back of his head. He was pulling an awkward expression.

Hidan was also quite frozen. He'd been on the receiving end of affection for once and, even though he'd been acting on it, he had no idea what to do now. He'd seen it in fiction and films but not experienced it in real life. This kind of human interaction was beyond him; he should have thought about this before he decided to fall in love with someone.

"….What do we do now?" Shikamaru was actually asking him this. Him!

"How would I know?"

"You kissed me!"

"'Cause you forced my hand, or whatever the phrase is."

"Well I don't know!"

"Then we're kind of stuck now, ain't we?"

"Yeah…" Another awkward silence.

"Couldn't I… Just do anythin'?" That was what mutual infection involved right?

"Err…" Shikamaru considered this. "I don't mind so much."

"Ok…"

Hidan was an awkward piece of shit. He hated contact. But maybe it would be better if he was the one starting it all off. Shikamaru knew him well enough not to push his luck too much. He shuffled closer to the male in front of him, still feeling sweaty and odd and put his hand up so he could place it on Shikamaru's cheek.

It was soft. And warm since the guy was blushing. Shikamaru was eyeing him up in surprise but he didn't look unhappy about it. Their eyes made contact and held, not breaking until Hidan started looking at Shikamaru's lips. They'd kissed before and they had been pleasant. Perhaps he could do it again?

Hidan hesitantly leant in until their lips slowly touched. It was just as pleasant as remembered and tasted kind of like coffee. And unlike last time, they didn't suddenly stop and run away at the end. Instead, they leaned against each other, Hidan with his head on Shikamaru's chest.

Shikamaru was pushed back on to the bed by Hidan's weight on to him and so the pair of them were lying on the bed. Hidan was currently topless so only one thin shirt stood between them and skin to skin contact. Both of his arms wrapped around Shikamaru's upper torso and Shikamaru had rested one arm over Hidan's back. It was strange for both of them since neither were sure what they should be doing exactly.

Hidan only knew one thing; he was going to have some fun with his Shikamaru. An arm snaked up and Shikamaru felt a hand touching his abdomen underneath the shirt. He tensed up.

"What are you doing?" It was cute.

"Touching what is now mine."

"Oh…" There were no complaints. He was free to do as he wanted.

Not that he was good enough to just do things. But he could start with this. Shikamaru was not the most muscular of males and so touching his abdomen, it felt soft and a little squishy. It would make a comfortable pillow.

And his hair. Hidan reached up and lightly ran his fingers across the top of Shikamaru's head, enjoying the sensation of the soft hair on his hand. Hidan was vaguely surprised when Shikamaru placed his hand on Hidan's head. He felt more hesitant than even Hidan; it was strange to be the confident one.

"This seems weird.

"Yeah… Ya like it?"

"I do… I think? Do you?"

"Might do…" He covered up his smirk by burying his face in Shikamaru's chest.