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Harry stood in front of the mirror in his dorm room bathroom examining his swollen eye. He knew that throwing the magical bands away could potentially be disastrous but something deep inside him fought to be free. He couldn't allow anyone to damper down his magic again. His dad just didn't understand how it felt, no one in this entire world could understand that awful twisted pull that pulsed with pain when the magical bands were constricting his very soul. He didn't feel guilty at all for what he had just done because the truth was, he was angry at his dad for having struck him like he had. Now that the potion Severus had given him was no longer making him complacent, he knew how wrong it had been for Severus to hit him in that way. Severus had never been exactly gentle when he disciplined him but he'd never given him a black eye before. It all just reeked of Uncle Vernon and that made him ill to think about. He didn't think that his magic had been that dangerous, or at least he thought maybe he could have controlled it with less violence on his dad's part. His dad had seemed almost scared of his magic and that really bothered him too. He thought maybe a tiny part of him had meant those awful words he'd said to Severus. Maybe he did have a bit of hate for what the man had done to him.
He used a sticking charm on his sleeves so they wouldn't ride up and expose his wrists. He wondered how long he could fool his dad. There shouldn't be any reason why Severus would ever find out that the magical bands were missing as long as Harry could spend most of his time in the tower and keep his wrists covered. There was a small part of him that felt as if this deceit was wrong but then again he also felt as if his dad had completely overreacted and punished him by using the magical bands, not to mention giving him a black eye. It would take a long time to get over that.
Severus continued to pace in Albus' office, finding it hard to settle his nerves. The calming drought he had taken hours ago was wearing off, bringing about an agitation that seemed to overwhelm him. He'd been mortified with himself for hitting Harry and couldn't shake the guilt for giving him a black eye. The moment Harry had stepped out of his bedroom he'd realized that he'd hit his son far harder than he'd intended.
He had to admit that the dark magic that had filled the dungeon bedroom and the walls shaking had scared him to his core. It felt the exact same way in Voldemort's lair - it even left behind a metallic tinge in the air that was unmistakably Voldemort's magical signature. He'd panicked and struck out to make it stop, using more force than was necessary. He knew that Harry was angry with him but he still couldn't give in to the boy and remove the bands until they could find another solution.
"Severus, please sit," Albus said from behind his desk. "Harry is very forgiving. I am certain he understands why you had to use such force."
Severus stopped pacing and swung around to glare at the headmaster. "You did not see his face. The boy puts far too much trust in me."
"It is well deserved," Albus said. "Harry knows you are working hard to come up with a solution."
Severus shook his head. He looked down at his hand, his knuckles were bruised. He couldn't stay here and listen to Albus offer excuses for his terrible behavior. Without another word he strode to the flue. When he entered his rooms he was concerned that the boys were not there. He couldn't blame Harry for wanting to leave the dungeons. Why in the world would the boy want to stick around after being hit and forced into the bands. He'd promised Harry that he'd never raise a hand to him along with the promise that he'd give Harry a normal life, free from all things Voldemort. Now though, he'd broken both promises.
The guilt that he felt was overwhelming. He reached for his bottle of Fire Whiskey, just wanting to dull his feelings for a bit.
The next day Harry skipped breakfast, not wanting to see Ginny or his dad. Ginny had been sending him messages through Ron but he'd yet to answer any of them.
She demanded that he come down and speak with her. It was apparent to him that he'd allowed the relationship to spiral into what felt like a bad marriage. She'd tell him what to do and he'd do it because it just wasn't worth the grief to fight with her. He was tired of being told what to do every minute of every day by teachers, his dad, his friends and most of all Ginny. He just needed some freedom away from everything. Now with his dad bent on staying at the castle until he found a solution, Harry didn't think he'd get away for quite some time. He gathered his books, dreading having to go to potions class this morning.
He arrived before most people and sat in the furthest seat in the back corner. He hoped that Ron and Hermione would sit somewhere else. The class began to fill, several students stared at him when they spotted him in the corner. He suddenly realized they were probably staring at his black eye. He had wanted to heal it but thought he shouldn't give Severus any reason to suspect him.
He was relieved when Draco walked in before Ron or Hermione. They might have went up to the tower to fetch him and that made him feel a bit of guilt. He knew how much Hermione hated to be late for class.
He called Draco over, indicating for him to sit next to him. The Slytherin gave him a questioning look but then sat down.
"What's up with your choice of seats?" Draco asked, knowing that Harry usually sat close to the front.
Harry shrugged. That was the thing about Draco, he never demanded to know every little thing that Harry was thinking.
Just then Ron and Hermione rushed into the classroom, immediately searching until they spotted Harry. Hermione started to walk towards him with that motherly look on her face but thankfully Severus made a sudden appearance and told everyone to sit in a tone that meant business.
Harry could see dark circles under his dad's eyes along with an unkept look that was uncharacteristic for the man. It looked like he'd had a rough night. That brought about a bit satisfaction to Harry. The man deserved a rough night.
Harry was caught off guard when his dad suddenly locked eyes with him. Harry immediately looked down, quickly tucking his hands under the table. Silence filled the room. Harry looked up and saw that his dad was still looking at him with a concerned expression. Harry looked down again, occluding his mind in case the man thought to cast a silent Legilimens. There was an uncomfortable silence as everyone looked from Harry and then to Severus. Harry clenched his fists under the table, pissed off that his dad would cause a scene. The last thing Harry wanted right now was more attention.
Severus seemed to snap out of his thoughts and he started his lecture in a terse tone that had everyone's attention. Harry felt relief when his dad had finally looked away. He shrunk down into his seat, wishing he'd just cut class today instead of coming. He kept his eyes trained to his desk, occasionally feeling his dad's eyes upon him.
Once the lecture ended, everyone went to get their ingredients from the supply closet. Harry stayed in his seat to set up the cauldron. He almost lit it with his wand when he realized that would be a dead giveaway.
A second later his father was standing on the other side of the desk.
"May I help you?" Severus asked, taking his wand out to light the cauldron.
Harry didn't look at him. His dad lit the cauldron and then just stood there. Harry didn't move.
After a moment, Severus finally said, "Will you please come down to the apartment for supper?" Then is a much quieter voice he said, "I am sorry, son. I over reacted. It was wrong of me to use such force."
Harry still didn't say anything but he felt a curl of anger start to form in his stomach. How dare the man ask him for anything.
A long moment passed with neither one saying anything. Finally Draco broke the silence when he came back with the potions. He placed the vials on the table then stopped and looked from one-man to the other.
"Everything okay?" Draco asked. After a minute Draco said, "Something is not right between you two."
Harry shook his head. He looked around and could see a lot of furtive glances pointed at them, including Hermione's blatant stare.
"Could you go away?" Harry asked as he finally met his dad's stare.
"No," Severus said. "Not until you agree to come down for supper."
Harry felt that curl of anger turn into something more. He had to get out of here or risk letting his anger take over in front of his dad. He pushed back away from the table, bending to grab up his rucksack. He stood and turned to go but was stopped when Severus reached a hand across the table and took hold of his arm.
"You are not excused," Severus said, gripping the boy's arm.
Harry yanked his arm away and then turned to look at him. "Do Not Touch Me," he said in low growl.
Severus moved to block his way. Harry shoved him out of the way with a force that was not wholly his own, "Get the fuck out of my way."
"Mr. Potter," Severus began to say but stopped when Harry swung back around to look at him with an anger in his eyes that Severus had never seen before. His heart constricted when he saw a flash of red in his son's eyes but then he wondered if it was a trick of the light. His mind immediately told him that what he had seen had just been an optical illusion.
He watched as Harry stormed out of the classroom.
Severus followed his son out into the hallway. He couldn't let the boy walk away like that.
"Harry James Potter, you stop this instant!"
Harry hesitated then stopped and turned to look at his dad. The hallway was empty and now that the classroom door had banged shut, they were all alone.
"I am going to fix this," Severus pleaded, as he stared into his son's face. That black eye stood out against his son's pale skin, taunting him with his parental inadequacies. "I promise you, son."
"You've said that before," Harry said in a tired voice that reeked of defeat. "I can't go through this again."
"Tell me then," Severus asked, "What will make this better while I search for a solution?"
"To get away," Harry stated, as he tried so hard to keep his anger in control. "To get the bloody hell away from here. I can't do this anymore, dad. So many people always staring, so many people wanting something from me, so much attention, … it's all too much."
"I understand," Severus said. He stepped closer to his son, but stopped walking when Harry stepped back away from him. The boy held his hands up to halt him.
"You understand? Yet you force me to stay here? You understand, yet you make me wear something that just makes me want to die? The thing is, I don't think you do understand," Harry beseeched as his magic began to crackle in the hallway. "You act like uncle Vernon and then you say that you understand? You don't understand anything!" It was all too much, he had to leave or risk being found out.
"Harry," Severus started to say, but suddenly froze when his son instantaneously disappeared with a loud pop!
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