66
Hedwig flew down the long corridor, and down to the dungeon, gliding right through the magical door that opened as she approached. She dropped the envelope onto the book that the wizard was reading.
Severus was so immersed in his calculations that he hadn't even heard the bird approach, therefore he was shocked when the envelope landed on his book. He looked at the front of it, immediately recognizing the address as being the house next to Lily's house in Godric's Hollow. He hadn't even thought to look there!
He knew that bringing the boy back to the castle would not be safe at this point, yet he needed to bring him here until the plan was in place. Having the help of Albus and Flitwick was imperative to his plan of ridding the boy of the dark magic once and for all. He hadn't wanted to resort to this but he knew he didn't have any other choice. With a heavy heart he went to the locked trunk in his laboratory and pulled out the metal dampers that would staunch Harry's magic completely. The heavy arm bands were not nearly as eloquent as the goblin made bands but they would assure that Harry wouldn't be able to use his magic to harm anyone.
Within minutes Severus made it down to the apparition point. In a flash he was standing in front of the dilapidated old house in Godric's Hollow. He'd been here only one time before and that day had been the worst day in his life. He felt as if it had been only yesterday that he'd held Lily in his arms as baby Harry cried from his crib. The idea that Harry would come back to this place was unsettling.
He used his wand to cast the spells that would allow him through the wards and into the house. He cast a lumos bringing into focus the battle scarred living room. He could feel Harry's magic humming and he knew the boy was here. He moved quickly searching the bottom floor as he called out to Harry. He made it up to the second floor, dreading the thought of seeing the nursery room again. He quickly saw that Harry was not there. He went down the hallway and tried a closed door. The door was stuck. He knocked as he called out to Harry. He could feel that Harry was in there by the magic emanating from the room. When his son didn't answer, he knew that something was not right. He tried spell after spell to unlock the door but to no avail. Finally he pulled open his potions pouch and used a potion that would melt the wooden door to ash.
The moment the door melted he saw that Harry was sleeping on the bed. He approached tentatively as he felt the room pulsing with a darkness that he'd only ever felt while in the presence of Voldemort. He was terrified that Harry may have succumbed to the darkness within.
He gently laid a hand on the boy's arm.
"Harry?" Severus whispered, not wanting to scare him. The boy didn't move Severus laid a hand on the boy's forehead and could feel a fever raging. He shook Harry, now just wanting to see the boy's eyes open.
"Harry, wake up," Severus implored. Still the boy didn't move. Severus cast a diagnostic spell, immediately reading that the boy had a shoulder injury. He pulled open the heavy cloak and saw that Harry was covered in blood. He spelled the cloak and shirt away and then peeled back the blood soaked towel. The injury to his shoulder was festering and hot to the touch. He probed the injury site, and could feel something hard beneath the skin.
He used a summoning spell then watched as the handle portion of Harry's wand came sliding out of his son's shoulder. Severus was mortified to see the gaping wound left behind. He knew that if he hadn't arrived when he did, the boy most likely would have bled out.
Severus immediately searched his bag for the proper potions to stabilize the boy and stop the blood flow. He tried to ignore the dark energy pouring out of his son. His hands were shaking as he conjured a bandage. The boy began to moan as Severus turned him on his side to secure the bandage on his shoulder. He finished as fast as he could. Harry began to flail until Severus was able to pour a pain potion down his throat, along with a very strong calming draught.
Severus quickly pulled the metal dampers from his rucksack. The arm braces went from the wrist, right up to the elbow. They were heavy, unwieldily arm bands that were once used in the ministry prisons until the more popular neck bands were invented. Vespa had used the neck band on Harry but the boy's magic had blown the instrument apart when he'd become desperate. For that reason, Severus knew that he couldn't take the chance of using the neck band on Harry again. The arm dampers where impossible to escape from without releasing the magical lock and this time he'd make sure only he and Albus knew the combination.
Severus locked both dampers just as the boy fully awoke.
Harry immediately pushed away from Severus.
"Calm down, Harry," Severus calmly said, "You've been injured. I'm here to help you."
Harry seemed very confused as he blinked several times and looked around as if he was looking for someone else in the room. He finally looked down at his arms as he sat on the edge of the bed. A moment passed and then Harry held his arms up in front of his face.
Severus thought that maybe the boy would begin to fight against wearing them but Harry looked up at him, his eyes widening in fear.
"Does this stop my magic?" Harry asked in a shaky voice.
Severus simply nodded. He waited to see how the boy would react, prepared for a struggle.
Harry closed his eyes as he dropped his arms down to his sides. His head hung as he took in deep breaths. Finally he looked up and met Severus' eyes.
"Good," Harry said.
Severus sighed in relief as he sat down on the bed next to Harry. He put an arm around him before asking, "What happened? You just disappeared."
"I didn't mean to, it just happened."
"Did you know that you were coming here, to Godric's Hollow?"
Harry shook is head. "No, I didn't even know where this was until I found the pictures." He gestured to the photos on the dressers. His arm fell down heavily to his lap when he saw the dampers again. He lifted his arms, turning them one way and then the other. "What are these?"
"Magical dampers." Before Harry could object Severus quickly added, "I may have found a solution but until then…we need to stop your magic." He gestured to the dampers.
Harry slowly nodded. "Um, it's probably for the best." His head dropped forward before he admitted, "It's getting harder to control my magic."
Severus could feel the room warming up and that awful metallic tinge begin to dissipate. "Are you okay, Harry?' Severus asked as he leaned forward so that he could look into his son's face.
Harry shrugged. "Voldemort's magic is still alive in that room. I'm terrible, dad. It … it felt good to be in that room, you know the room my mum died in?" Harry admitted. He covered his face with his hands. "I've turned into a monster."
Severus dropped to a knee in front of Harry. He pulled the boy's hands away from his face. "Harry, that wasn't you. Voldemort's power is getting stronger within you but I may have found a way to siphon it out of you once and for all. You just have to hold it together until then. I promise this will be the last time you have to deal with Voldemort." He pulled Harry's head forward until it rested on his shoulder. He rubbed the back of Harry's head as the boy began to cry.
"I can't do it again," Harry cried. "I'm can't take anymore."
"Harry," Severus said as his heart tore apart at the sound of Harry crying. "I'll help you. We can do this."
Harry finally calmed down. He tried to wrap his arms around his dad but the dampers were far too heavy to lift in his drugged up condition. His head felt heavy and he just wanted to sleep. Instead he sagged forward and let his dad hold him. He had to keep reminding himself that he wasn't alone.
His dad continued to rub his back until he was finally able to pull himself together.
"My wand," Harry groaned as he suddenly remembered.
"There are others," Severus said. "Perhaps a new wand for a fresh start will do you well."
Harry nodded, feeling miserable for having to part with a wand that had been through everything with him.
"Should we go back to the school?" Severus asked, looking into Harry's red rimmed eyes.
Harry shrugged. "Do we have to? Can't we go to the cabin?"
"I'm so close to finding the solution. The sooner we get back, the sooner we can end this, Harry." He stood up, pulling Harry by his hands to stand as well.
Harry looked around the room. Severus spelled away the blood from his school shirt, then used his wand to put it on Harry. The dampers were too big for the sleeves so he spelled away the lower sleeves. Harry found the fur lined cloak on the floor and picked it up. His dad helped him to put it over his shoulders.
Harry closed the lion clasp on the cloak. "This was my dad's, I think," Harry said.
Severus nodded. "It is beautiful."
The boy had very little to remind him of the parents who had died to save him. He looked around at all the pictures scattered throughout the room. "Would you like me to collect the images?"
"Yes," Harry said. He wanted more time to look at the people in the pictures. He watched as his dad summoned all of the pictures to him. They were all shrunk and spelled to land in the small pouch that Severus kept tied to his belt.
Severus wrapped an arm around Harry and they apparated back to the gates of the castle.
The walk up to the castle took four times as long as it usually would between the calming draught, the extra weight of the arm dampers and the loss of blood that was making Harry feel slow and dizzy.
Thankfully it was late so they didn't run into any students. Halfway up the steep hill, Harry felt incredibly drained. He stopped walking and decided to just sit down and take a break. Severus sat next to him. Harry laid back, wrapping the warm fur cloak to cover his arms. He had something important to ask his father but he was nervous. This was so important to him and he didn't know what he would do if the man didn't agree.
Severus cast a warming spell over both of them before he laid back on the grass. He put his hands under his head as he stared up at the stars.
After a few long minutes, Severus finally spoke, "Do not let yourself become overly anxious. The spell that I found was successful, perhaps not conventional but it did work."
"I know you're going to try your best." Harry turned to look at his dad. "Can you promise me something?"
Severus looked at his son. "I believe you know me better than that. I cannot promise anything until I hear your request."
Harry huffed out then starred back at the stars. "You probably won't agree but I just want you to know that it would make me sleep so much better if you did agree."
"What is your request?"
Harry sighed. He felt his throat close up with emotion that he swallowed down. He wanted to ask the question with as much strength and conviction in his voice that he could muster. If his dad would agree then he felt as if the weight of the world would be taken off his shoulders.
"Oh Merlin," Harry whispered before bucking up the courage to ask his question. "If this spell doesn't work, and if Voldemort's dark magic is left inside me, … well, um, could you please promise that you won't let me live?"
There was a long silence before Severus finally spoke. Harry wasn't prepared for the utter anger in his dad's tone.
"That may be the most idiotic thing you have ever said, Mr. Potter." Severus suddenly stood up. He snapped his fingers at Harry before saying, "Get up. I have much research to attend to." He began to walk up the hill, not waiting for Harry to join him.
Harry got up and followed behind his dad. He didn't think his dad would react that way to his request. He just didn't want to live if there was any chance at all of turning into Voldemort and he thought his dad would understand.
He hurried up the hill until he caught up with his dad. He reached out and pulled on the man's sleeve. "Dad, wait. You understand don't you?"
Severus abruptly stopped walking and turned the full impact of his ire on his son.
"No! No, I do not understand how you could even ask such a thing. I am finding it very hard to hold my anger in check at this moment. For you to even consider …" Severus huffed out and then turned and began to walk up the hill with fists clenched.
"But, I'm just saying if your plan doesn't work, then I just don't want to end up like…"
Severus swung back around and stormed up to Harry. He grabbed the front of his shirt and jerked him forward. "Do. Not. Say. It. Again!" He gave Harry a shake before releasing him. "I never even considered that you would give up hope."
Harry staggered back as he tried to catch his balance. "I don't want to live like this!" He held up his arms. The moon reflected off the metal dampers.
"Shut up!" Severus snarled out, so angry now that he needed to get away from his son. "You would do well to sleep in the Tower tonight."
"Dad, I'm sorry. I think maybe we should talk about it," Harry pleaded, just wanting his dad to hear him out, make Severus understand how much that promise would alleviate the terrible weight on his shoulders.
"Shut the bloody hell up!" Severus yelled. "Get up to the Tower!"
Harry had never seen his dad so angry! He watched as his dad stormed off without even looking back. By the time Harry had finally made it up to the Tower he was exhausted. The dampers weighed so much and even though he'd had blood replenishers, he felt as if he was ready to fall down. With a heavy heart he walked into his dorm.
Everyone was already asleep, which he was grateful for. He couldn't get his shirt off with the large dampers but he didn't care. He fell into bed fully clothed, reaching around to pull the curtains around his bed.
His sleep was peppered with nightmares about the battles he'd fought in. He woke up all night long, each time from a different dream that ended with him bloodied and hurt as he starred into Voldemort's red eyes. He was exhausted and relieved when the sun finally began to rise.
He stayed in bed, wondering how in Merlin's name he was ever going to get his dad to understand all that he was feeling? Tom Riddle had once been a normal person - or as normal as one could be having grown up in an orphanage and without the influence of family. Even though Harry had Severus now, he'd pretty much grown up with no one to rely on… just like Voldemort had grown up. No one could predict what would happen in the future to someone like him, someone with such immense power and the adulation of so many people. 'A person's sense of morality lessens as his power increases - Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely' - He remembered reading that in one of his muggle books only to find out that Lord Acton was actually a wizard who'd been alive during the time of Grindelwald.
Maybe that was why he abhorred the attention he received, because the more people looked up to him and looked to him for answers, the more he felt as if he could get away with anything, just like Voldemort had. Someone had to check him, someone had to have the power to knock him out, should he ever attempt to bring a building down or decide to push his own ideas on everyone else. There was only one person who had been brave enough and that person was the only one who could stop him should he ever lose his mind and turn into a dark wizard. If Severus didn't agree, he knew the world wouldn't be safe.
Anyone out there still reading?