CHAPTER XIV – MALLRATS

He wondered if gravity was somehow broken.

Large, blue balls hung precariously by the thinnest strands. Surely it was a matter of time until they were damaged and hurt somebody, right? But as was the case, they weren't causing anyone any physical grief.

How could they? They were the mall's oversized Christmas ornaments hanging not-so-precariously from the rafters.

He had heard horror stories from CREAM that once November hit, holiday pandemonium was just beginning its consumeristic hold on the good people of the world. Bing Crosby, Michael Bublé, and the horrific agony that was Madonna's version of "Santa Baby" could be heard far and wide. In every corner, he both saw and heard the holiday chaos that was Christmastime at the local mall. Shops, store windows, and every hall were (literally) decked out with stringed lights, candy canes, garland, faux pine trees, and giant nutcrackers that went on for seemingly miles. Even the food court restaurants on his left were getting in on the action with holiday advertising and workers with iconic red and white hats. And was that Santa himself down the way at the heart of the mall?

Sonic—in his Shadow disguise—had to step off to the side and sit down at the many food court tables just to get his bearings. His eyes were getting sucker-punched with all the bright reds, green, golds, and whites. Too much cheer and pizzazz. Too much holiday, graphical input for early November. He now understood why older people despised celebrating Christmas too early. And he would have to deal with this for another seven or eight weeks? How could he find anything for Amy with all of this visual noise?!

"Somebody shoot me now," he quietly begged.

Sadly, no one would at that moment, so "Sonadow" sucked it up like a buttercup and walked to the nearest mall map. Up top was the directory with each shop colored differently on each of the building's two floors depending on the type of store. Bookstores were green, high-end shops like jewelers and haberdasheries were orange, sporting goods stores were colored pastel pink, food areas that weren't in the nearby court were red, girly shops were blue, and so on and so forth. Sonadow felt like a total Karen at that moment wanting to have a word with the person in charge of this map. Girly shops colored blue with manly, sports stores in pink? He wasn't one to judge, but the color coordinating seemed backwards.

Looking at how spacious the mall was, even on the map, Sonic still didn't know where to start. Maybe the Nike shop? No, Amy wasn't into sporty footwear, nor was she that into sports outside of Mobotropolis United. How about the Barnes and Noble on the other end of the store? Not a bad idea since the news business deals a lot with reading and words in general, but there lied the rub: what kind of books did Amy read? A gift card! Gift cards were like tacos: everyone likes them.

Okay, one gift idea down… Chaos knows how many to go. He rubbed his head, cursing himself for thinking this might be easy. However, if there was anything he was good at, it was improvising, so he began to stroll down the corridors and take in the sights, waiting for inspiration to strike him like a bolt of lightning. The first of these stores down the north hallway were some the many kiosks. Most of them were run-of-the-mill stands that one would expect at malls: stands for the next year's calendars, iPhone cases with various sports teams and images, lanyard keychains, and… massage tables? Sonic didn't quite know how to interpret that, but he was willing to chalk that up to his lack of mall knowledge since he could count the number of times he had been to one… on one finger.

Nothing seemed to tickle his fancy at that moment. Maybe putting Amy's wants on the backburner was a good idea. Maybe he should get something for Tails? No, he had to focus. Amy was more important currently, he just wished that the aforementioned lightning bolt of inspiration would strike him now.

Having made his way to the heart of the mall, "Sonadow" stopped at a bench near Santa's big chair. It didn't look like jolly ol' St. Nicholas was in yet which didn't surprise him since most of the city's kids were still suffering in school by now. It didn't mean that there wasn't a crying baby within earshot no matter where he went, but at least the amount of rugrats and youngsters was at a minimum to somewhat put him at ease. He recalled CREAM's lessons and how him and Green would pitch a fit when they didn't get what they wanted like the entitled shits that they were.

Looking around at the escalators going to the second level, he tried to eyeball shops up there that might interest Amy. Let's see, a drug store selling whey protein (among other supplements), a GameStop where he'd only get $3 if he traded in a well-kept PS2 and all of that console's games, and an authentic cheese stop with all the muenster curd fixings one could wish for.

Suddenly, Sonic was snapped out of his trance when someone tapped his shoulder from behind. Not expecting it, he jumped a bit and made the fat, old man who got his attention laugh like a troll. Or in this case, an elf. The man couldn't have been younger than 70, but his iconic, white beard paired well with his classic glasses to make him look like the real thing. Whoever this guy was, the mall was getting their money's worth with this version of St. Nick, especially with that charming, heart-warming smile of his.

"Didn't mean to startle you," Santa said in a bellowing tone, catching him off-guard.

"It's okay. I'm trying to figure out where to go," Shadow replied in husky voice.

"Shopping for someone else?"

"I… forgive my French, I fucked up. I'm trying to make it up to her with a gift."

Santa's face lost its smile, but he nodded understandingly. "Flowers are a good apology."

Sonic shook his head. "She's not into flowers. To be honest, I can't think of anywhere to start."

"What's your strategy? You'll know it when you see it?"

"Yes, except I'm still not finding squat, but I've also only been down one hall so far."

"Ah. Then you've got plenty of mall to explore, but may I suggest something?" Shadow nodded, prompting the fat man to point down the hall on Sonic's 9 o'clock. "My wife loves Bed, Bath, and Bodyworks. Take it from a man who's been with his fair share of ladies, a woman's always in the market for hair and shampoo products. Y'know, to make 'em look and pretty. Or at least make her think she's pretty even if she can't put on makeup worth a damn."

The ebony-disguised hedgehog chuckled and thought back to the house, specifically the bathroom. He did seem to recall how Amy had a matching set of Dragon Kingdom Cherry Blossom shampoo, conditioner, and even hand soap. Practical gifts and they even smelled nice. Also… Sonic was oddly fond of bath bombs, and Amy was wondering where they had been disappearing to.

"Thanks a bunch. I'll make sure to leave you some cookies in a few weeks."

"Make it bowl of gummi bears, and you're golden. Take it easy, man."

Shadow nodded as she shook the man's hand. "You too."

Make sure the safety was still on. Press a button and drop the ammunition. Cock the metal top backwards and flip a switch behind and above the trigger to expel the one in the chamber. Flip open a cold, metal flap. Use a screwdriver to flip a tiny, yellow handle where the magazine used to be. Pull the top part of the opened firearm back and slide forward to take its top off. Put that down and carefully take out the heavy spring, being very gentle to not pinch one's fingers. Don't forget to take that hollowed pipe with the grooved interior and put it aside.

When all was said and done, Rouge took a cylindrical scrubber and tied it to slender, brass pole. She quickly inserted and pulled out, somehow getting oddly aroused at the action (sexual repression maybe?). When that was done, she took apart the metal staff and scrubber only to take a thin cloth and fold it three times before putting two drops of gun oil on it. There were a handful of spots that needed it; four in the back, two in the front, and one on the pipe of the pistol (the specific name for the piece escaped her at the moment). Once all were oiled up, she swiftly started to piece her sidearm together like a 3-D jigsaw puzzle.

Even since her G.U.N. days, she'd found this process satisfying, probably because of how she controlled the pace of it, how she fancied herself the goddess of this contraption of metal and brass rounds. She was its master and destroyer. She controlled its every action. She got to pass judgement on whether it was in pieces or put together… or maybe she was like its mother and cleaning up after it was her job. Given how messy it got sometimes, the latter was probably more accurate.

The final part of reassembly was the insertion of the rounds. One shove up the handle and a quick and loud CLICK meant one was in the chamber. When it dropped in, she instinctively aimed it at a target on the far closet door with the sights perfectly lined up on the bullseye.

KNOCK KNOCK!

She sighed as her "playtime" had to come to an end. She quickly made sure the safety was still on and holstered her 9mm handgun as Vector had come in. "Boss, there's a package for you."

Rouge looked at her good-natured officer. "I kind of figured I'd get to my mail on my own time, Vec."

The crocodile walked up to her desk and set the package down, pointing out the spot where a return address would usually be. Actually, there wasn't any kind of stamp or postage on it. Just the initials "F.F." in the corner.

Aw, damn.

Rouge understood why Vector brought it up and ripped the parcel apart. A small plastic box fell out and opened, revealing a DVD still nested into its holder with two words on it.

"'Play me,'" Rouge said reading the disk. Vector went behind the desk as Rouge plucked the disk and through it into her laptop. "Oh, this outta be good."

The echidna didn't really give two damns if this was a shameful satellite version in the mall's food court. Whenever he came to Mobotropolis, his Echidna Tribe ancestral stomping grounds, he had to stop here for the best gyros in town. The succulent, juicy meat, the overuse of tzatziki sauce, the diced onions and tomatoes, and the fresh-from-the-fryer fries. All those wonderful culinary items wrapped up in crispy piece of pita bread. He had to have two of them to go with his large Coke. They were just that good.

Taking his seat facing toward the main entrance, he quickly bowed his head and said a prayer of thanks to his tribal forefathers and foremothers for the food he'd been given, a tradition that his parents had done until their deaths (may their souls rest in peace).

He took in his food's delicious odors once again, and his stomach rumbled on cue. "Easy, old friend," he told his stomach with a small patting. He grabbed the first one, the fresher, warmer one, and started to open his mouth. The heat coming off it made his fingers feel all kinds of nice. But it wasn't to be as his eyes caught a small group of younger men all dressed in black suits, ties, and sunglasses. They should've taken the shades off this far inside by now. Besides, the weather report called for thick clouds all day. There wasn't much brightness outside to speak of. And they were each carrying a small bag, like a backpack, but didn't the glass doors out front say that all backpacks and duffels were illegal on the grounds?

Then it happened. They all put bandanas over their mouths. His training kicked in, and he hurried away from the food and bolted for the door. He hoped that there wasn't one just outside the doors, but a big, white van parked near the entrance with a driver dressed exactly like those men sealed the deal.

This was bad. People might get hurt. This would be a worldwide story that no one would want to hear. Being the senior agent he was, Knuckles quietly drew out his pistol and decided that the first thing to do was take out their wheelman, so he burst out the door past a few people and yelled, "DON'T GO IN THERE!"

The would-be customers looked at him with confused looks, but the getaway driver saw the echidna barreling down on him and nearly crapped his shorts when he flashed his badge and his .357 SIG.

Busted!

"GUARDIAN UNITS OF NATIONS! GET OUT OF THE CAR NOW!"

The getaway man had no choice. His fate was staring him down the barrel of a military-grade sidearm. He expected them to maybe face the cops, but the fucking feds?!

"SHOW ME YOUR HANDS!" The nervous man promptly did so. "WINDOW DOWN!" He did so again. "OPEN THE DOOR FROM THE OUTSIDE!" And again. When it was opened enough, Knuckles jerked him out and threw him against the fender. "Stay still!" he barked as he whipped out his phone and punched in three digits.

"9-1-1, what's your emergency?" the officer asked.

"Robbery in progress. North Towne Mall. Tell Commissioner Rouge that Agent Knuckles of G.U.N. will do his best to make sure that there will be no casualties."

"Sir, what did you say?!"

The bridge of her nose was getting a furious rubdown as she tried to relieve a bit of stress. Watching the video a second time didn't sit well with her knowing what she and Sonic were now up against. This all seemed too easy, but they had to play by her rules lest someone innocent get hurt or die. It didn't matter if Fiona was bluffing or not; they couldn't take that chance.

She was about to put in her earpiece communicator and call for Sonic to fill him in, but she had to put it back on her desk when her office phone rang. Line 7. She cursed herself because any call on "Lucky #7" was anything but.

She answered and asked, "What is it?"

"Rouge, we have a robbery in progress at North Towne Mall."

"Line 7's for the big emergencies," Rouge scolded. "Have the nearest patrolling officers get there ASAP."

"Boss, the tip came from someone who claims he's a G.U.N. agent; says you know him."

Rouge paused. "A G.U.N. agent? He give a name?"

"Knuckles."

Wait, hold on a second. "Knuckles the Echidna?!"

"I'll take it you know him."

Rouge rubbed her temples in frustration. Why didn't he call ahead to say he was in town? And why did he have to stumble upon a robbery now when she had bigger fish to fry?

"I'm headed to North Towne," Rouge stated. "Coordinate with the Amusement Mile precinct. I'll be there shortly." Rouge could not hang up fast enough as she rushed to her closet and pulled out the essentials. A bulletproof vest, her MPD overcoat, and the thickest winter cap she had. She swiftly threw them on and grabbed her sidearm with a few extra loaded magazines, each with nine cylinders of brass on standby. She made sure one was in the chamber before rushing out her office and down the nearest flight of stairs to the garage. She heisted the keys from her pocket, unlocked her Mustang, and started the engine. With a loud peel-out, she flipped on the sirens and started her trek.

Being in there for more than ten seconds made him feel uncomfortable. From the minute he walked in, the bright, overly feminine colors and pungent perfumes made his senses cry out in pain, namely smell and sight. Too many sweet scents, too many flowery aromas. It was enough to make a man's skin crawl. That, and the all the single ladies shopping there were eyeing him up like a medium-rare prime rib. Maybe he shouldn't have gone in his dark, mysterious disguise. His ebony quills and tanned muzzle made him look like the next man lookin' for love on The Bachelor. Should he have gone in as Sonic? No, that would have been worse.

The moment he plucked his plastic card out of the chip reader, he hurried for the exit with cherry blossom and bath bomb toiletries in hand. It wasn't easy fitting all of these items into one small bag, but the cashier did it, and boy, did it weigh a ton. In the end, he felt like he'd accomplished his mission. He just hoped that this would be enough of an apology to Amy. Okay, it probably wasn't, but at least the bag of goodies would make a neat peace offering, even if the Acorns thought the fragrant ensemble might work better as a Christmas present.

The Acorns. Alicia and Max were a well-oiled machine. The best in their business, and it helped that their daughter was damn good in the business too. An amazing family, and an amazing team. Team… they used that word poignantly with him. Tails, CREAM, Amy, and Rouge. Goodness, what happened? Him, that's what happened. Max and Alicia were right: he wanted to get this business done too quickly. Going from a cybernetic snake bind then trying to bust the busty vixen in too quick of a time. Doing things quickly and efficiently was all he knew. Robotnik and CREAM pushed him and Green to do tasks promptly. He was going too fast, out of control. Because of that, he had a plate put in his ribcage, and he acted out when he got too impatient.

To try and erase those painful memories, he reached into the bag and extracted the bottle of shampoo. Its contents were a shade of pink lighter than Amy's, but its scent was just as sweet. He popped the top and gently squeezed, releasing its pleasurable smell, but none of the soapy product. One sniff made Sonic think about what happened every morning. Amy would always have the bathroom before him. She'd steam up the entire room when she left, much to Sonic's annoyance. He wasn't the only man in the house and wanted to conserve as much hot water as possible for Tails, which was easy since he was usually good for a quick shower. But from time to time, Sonic would linger in the tub a little longer because Amy routinely used too much conditioner, shampoo, soap, and skin cleaner. While the only odorless thing in the bathroom was the water, the other items were all that same cherry blossom aroma that he'd admittedly grown fond of. He expected there to be excess pink fluid on the bath's floor. He had nearly slipped on that a few times, but its fragrance was… weirdly intoxicating. So much so that when Amy didn't use it, Sonic was left dumbfounded. How could someone as sweet and loving as Amy not cleanse herself with heavenly fluids that would make her even more attract—.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

"Sonadow" let out disgusted sigh and had to check between his legs to make sure—. Oh, thank Chaos nothing was showing. If he had indulged his more carnal thoughts even—.

BANG!

SMASH!

WHEE-OOH! WHEE-OOH! WHEE-OOH! WHEE-OOH! WHEE-OOH! WHEE-OOH!

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

The mall went into a frenzy. Anyone within earshot looked on in horror only to run away in panic as a loud alarm sounded nearby. The few children waiting for Santa Claus screamed as their parents rushed in to try and get them to safety. Shadow looked ahead to find a group of men all dressed in suits, dark shades, bandanas covering their faces, and packing heat. That loud gunshot at the ceiling was a warning, and that smash was the nearby jewelry case getting raided.

Knowing it was time for action, Sonic quickly got up and vaulted over the bench. He pressed a button on each Air Shoe to reveal his new sneakers, the Hi-Speed Shoes making their grand debut. With a quick press of his chest fur, the microbots that had covered him and turned his fur black and red returned to their home in the Fluff. His royal blue fur was back on full display, his deadly green eyes were no longer blood red. His magnetic gloves and shoes were ready, and the same could be said for his wrist grapples. But as Sonic was recovering from the vault, his midsection flared up painfully again, making him wince and grab it. "Taking this slow" would have to take a backseat.

Time for action.

"D.V. on," he commanded, and his heads-up display showed all of the running and panicking skeletons of everyone else heading for the nearest exit, but more importantly the orange-marked armed thugs and their hostages from across the case. Six hostiles. Two were pointing their weapons at the jewelry workers, two were smashing the cases and swiping the "ice," and the last two had shotguns were on lookout and crowd control. And now another armed man was running in from the food court area, but he quickly ducked under cover as his sidearm was ready to go in his right hand. Was there a seventh member to this heist?

No matter, Sonic's first priority was to get the hostages to safety. Eight store workers were cowering on the other side of case, and as stated before, two were robbers waved their guns at them to keep from doing anything stupid or heroic. He figured he'd simply zip by them all and relieve them of their weapons, but Sonic tried took one step and started hurting again. He doubled over as a sharp wave of pain draped over him, but even worse one of the robbers on guard duty saw that move and went to investigate.

"Aw, fuck," Sonic thought as he needed to quickly decide. What was he gonna do next?

"DROP YOUR WEAPONS!"

Sonic said, "Huh?!" and turned back, while still in D.V. mode to see that seventh gunman now pointing his gun at the robbers, quickly popping off a warning shot of his own into the ceiling.

"GUARDIAN UNITS OF NATIONS! PUT YOUR WEAPONS DOWN!" the strong voice bellowed again.

Wait… Guardian Units of Nations?

"What is a G.U.N. agent doing here?!" Sonic thought out loud. The hero's words caught the attention of the other spotter, who was instructed to investigate him. Now, about the coming toward Sonic—. Aw, piss.

"Hands where I can see 'em!" the dog gunman barked. Then he realized who he was aiming at. "Oh, cr—!" Sonic immediately shot a grapple at the dog's mask and yanked his face into the bench with a loud CRACK! One nose broken and bloodied. Sonic then dragged the canine over and smacked the dazed dog in the skull to knock him out, unloading and dissembling his sidearm to be safe.

Then there was the matter of the other guy, that G.U.N. agent. He was ready to pop the bad guy, but the heist man saw what happened to his buddy and was distracted, leaving an opening for the agent to land a vicious harsh haymaker, splintering his jaw and taking him out of the fight.

The two guys keeping tabs of the jewelry workers then saw how their downed comrades were taken out, but they shat bricks when it occurred to them that they had Sonic the Hedgehog to their left, and a physical bruiser of a G.U.N. agent on their right.

"Goddammit!" the ringleader cursed. "We gotta go!" He then turned their weapons to Sonic who'd just vaulted over to take them head-on and the agent who had his sidearm drawn. They were both closing in on their targets, walking towards them and making their enemies cower a bit. The guys at the case were grabbing stones indiscriminately, regardless if they were diamonds or glass shards. With stones in hand, they quickly drew out their weapons and aimed it at the would-be heroes.

"Your driver's out of commission, boys!" the agent said loudly. "And the cops are on their way!"

"I try to have one day to myself, and you jerkoffs picked today to stick up a mall," Sonic hissed as his angry eyes were not looking friendly to the robbers.

"This is gonna end one way, gentlemen," the echidna said. "Drop your weapons and the jewels. I have a friend in this town who would take great offense to you endangering stones that valuable."

"A friend in this town with a love for jewelry?" Sonic thought. Then he started to piece it together. Who did Sonic know that loved precious stones? "This guy knows Rouge?"

This was when one of the case-crashers shot secretly grabbed a large shard of glass and nodded to his boss to not surrender. Their leader nodded and said, "Try us."

BANG!

Oh, why did they have to shoot at Sonic? The speedster easily dodged the shot. "Damn!" the robber said as he uploaded his clip with Sonic making him miss every time. And with each shot, Sonic's anger grew.

The gunman trained on the fed was playing a lethal game of "chicken" as they tried to bluff each other on who was gonna drop their weapon first. As Sonic ducked and dodged, the agent's impatience reached its peak. He quickly lowered his weapon and rang out a shot that nailed the robber in the foot.

"GAH!" he screamed as the federale charged him and decked him harshly. Another gunman took aim. He missed the agent but knocked the gun out of the echidna's hand. Seeing Sonic's pissed pupils was bad enough, but this guy's purple eyes made him look downright demonic. The agent then cracked his namesake and charged, forcing his opposition to fire. One grazed his leg, another pierced his thigh, but the fed tackled the guy and laid two good hits on his face to end his day. Picking up his gun, he took aim at the others who were getting outright toyed by Sonic.

BANG! MISS! BANG! BANG! MISS! MISS! BANG! BANG! BANG! MISS! MISS! MISS!

Their clicking pistols meant Sonic was to deal some serious damage. With a wicked smile, Sonic zoomed into one robber, plowing him over with a harsh THUD! He then turned to the last one who was readying himself in a fighting stance. Sonic took the challenge and let him take the first few swings. Sonic hadn't met a fighter this off-balance in a while. Unset feed, he lunged wildly, missing the mark badly with every attempt; Sonic deflected every blow he threw until he caught his punch. Sonic's smirk sealed the man's fate as the hero jerked the wrist up. The compound fracture sent the fighter into shock, but Sonic's kidney shots made sure he'd be sent into traction.

The last robber remaining got up from his daze to see Sonic grab him by the arm and spin him around. "WHOOOOOA!" the criminal yelled as Sonic smiled and felt a sense of charity.

"Hey, special agent!" Sonic said as he let loose the dizzied man. "Finish him!" The fed obliged and caught the man by the face and threw his left hook into his side, cracking two ribs and sending him down in a wave of pain.

Knowing the echidna's work was done, he looked up at Sonic and smiled. The hedgehog returned with a nod, but the agent's eyes quickly went to Sonic's torso. Sonic followed his line of vision to see… oh, wonderful. Sonic dabbed the spot where his own blood was coming out of. He should've known that this extreme physical activity would rip his stiches wide open, revealing his surgical wound from the previous night.

"I'm sure an ambulance is on its way," the echidna agent stated.

"I'll need one," Sonic replied before turning to the jewelers, who were resting their bodies after their experiences. "Is everyone okay? Is there anybody hurt?"

The jeweler's owner was an older, distinguished man as evidenced by his white mustache. "We're shaken, but I think we're okay." He then went to the back to shut off the alarm as the threat was neutralized.

Sonic nodded and then covered up his wound as the adrenaline started to wear off, bringing up that familiar pain again. He could still stand, but he was struggling. The agent turned back to see Sonic, but he could see the hero was not doing so hot. For a brief moment, the mall was dead silent, but then the sound of police sirens outside began to echo toward them.

The echidna smiled and pulled out his phone, dialing a familiar number. After a few rings, an old friend answered in a serious voice.

"Knuckles, what is going on in there?!"

"Nothing now. The threat's been neutralized," he stated firmly. "Gonna need medics for the robbers and Sonic."

"SONIC IS IN THERE?!"

"Fucking hell, Rouge! You don't need to scream! He helped me take these jokers down, but his torso is bleeding."

"Are we clear to enter?"

"Crystal."

"Alright, we're coming in."

Knuckles then hung up and tried to find Sonic. It wasn't hard. He was resting at a far bench looking more annoyed than anything else. The agent walked past the carnage as the police came in to take control of the situation.

The agent stopped next to the wounded hero and saw him shake his head at the nearby bag of… well, "goodies" wasn't the operative word anymore. The red and gold bag of shampoo and conditioner had been riddled with bullets, making the contents leak out in a pungent, pink mess. At least it smelled nice, though that was little comfort to him.

"You buy that or somethin'?" Knuckles asked.

"It was for a friend," Sonic said in a disappointed tone. He then grabbed the bag and reached to toss it in the nearest trash bin, but the pain in his midsection caused him to wince again. Knuckles caught the leaking bag and finished the job for him before tending to his wound.

"Black strings… you have surgery recently?"

"About 14 hours ago," Sonic answered as he still maintained pressure on it.

"Torn sutures. Been there, done that. You want my advice?" Sonic shot up an eyebrow. "After the wound gets patched, put a layer of Krazy Glue on it."

Sonic looked up to him with the exact bewildered expression one would expect. "What?"

"It sounds nuts, but it'll keep that wound sealed."

"And you know this how?"

"My dad was a stubborn bastard; said he didn't have time to bleed. He threw on some glue and would be back to work in a few minutes."

Sonic laughed. "I'll have to remember that one." Sonic then offered his hand, even if it was a bit bloodied. "I'm Sonic."

"And I'm Knuckles," the agent replied. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. I just wish it was under better circumstances."

Sonic scoffed. "I get that from criminals all the time."

Knuckles chuckled. "You don't say?"

"Sonic!" a female voice called. Low and behold, there stood the commissioner amongst the carnage with a few police paramedics behind her. She walked through the scene of cops cuffing robbers to stand in front of him. "We've got loads to talk about," she said some slight panic in her voice.

Sonic chuckled. "It's always business with you. Can't you just talk to me to say 'Hi?'"

"No."

She then turned to Knuckles. They didn't say anything at first. They were just… staring at each other with crossed arms. As the paramedics began to tend to Sonic's broken incision, the hero felt an undeniable tension between the two. He figured they knew each other given his banter during the tussle. The kind of eye contact they shared told him these two had history. And judging by the length of the silence, it was A LOT of history.

She shook her head. "Figures that you would stumble onto a heist like this."

The two finally laughed and gave each other a big hug, making Sonic smile for some reason. Knuckles then pointed at the downed criminals and said, "I just got my lunch when these losers showed up. I hope my food's still there."

"It'll be cold, but I'm sure it is. How've you been?"

Knuckles looked away, almost embarrassed that she brought it up. Rouge knew him well enough that all was not well in his paradise. "Been better. I was… I need to talk to you sooner rather than later."

"I'm sorry, but that'll have to wait. We've got problems of our own."

"I've heard, but I'm under orders."

"Did the Commander send you here to keep tabs on this?"

"I… can't explain that right now, but Rotor had me drop off a few items for Tails. Poor guy was looking rough."

"I'm partially to blame for that," Sonic said with regret in his voice. "Were you two partners at G.U.N. or something?" They nodded. "Same black ops team?" They nodded again prompting Sonic to shake head. "The shit you two must've seen."

"We could tell you all kinds of hair-raising stories if my superiors would declassify them for you," Knuckles said.

"In short," Rouge started, "you're not gonna hear 'em." Then the commissioner was buzzed on her walkie. "Go ahead. … Great." Then she turned back to the boys. "Ambulance is here. Same with the short-bus for these jokers." She then picked up one of the broken, cuffed men, still out from the shock of it all. "Knucklehead, wanna lend a hand?"

Knuckles sighed, but he picked up another one of the robbers. "Why does this always end with me doing your bidding?"

As they began to walk away, she replied, "I like to think of it as 'following orders.'"

Sonic shook his head and figured the cops would take care of the other criminals. Sonic waved off those tending to him and began to head back towards the food court, still miffed about Amy's gift basket being torn to shreds. What a way to piss away $40. Looking back at the damaged jewelry store, he saw how most of the cases had been destroyed, but not the ones in the middle. Then something magical caught his eye. Making a quick detour, he went up to intact case and feasted his eyes upon a gorgeous set of diamond earrings. Set upon 18 karat gold, they were shaped into beautiful roses, their craftsmanship second-to-none.

Maybe he could still make it up to Amy after all.

"Excuse me?" Sonic asked one of the still-panicked workers. "What can you tell me about those earrings?"

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Anyone who has worked in retail will tell you that working during Christmastime may as well be one of Dante's Circles of Hell. Now imagine working as a retail worker for eight Christmases at a Walmart. And hearing the god-awful holiday music the moment Halloween ends. *SHUDDERS* Four covers of Santa baby being played every hour over the PA system will drive any sane man to the nearest loony bin.

Trauma aside, here we have Knuckles's proper introduction, and Rouge hit right on the head: Knuckles would find himself brawling in less than ten minutes. And those two. Rouge and Knuckles were a part of the same team for G.U.N. for a few years. Rouge was always the point-woman on those missions, but Knuckles was her number two. Apparently they were an effective team, or at least that's what Sonic gathered. We'll see more of him as time goes on, just letting you know that now.

And before you ask, yes, that bit about Krazy Glue (better known as the KRAGLE) is something my dad does. Still does, in fact. I'll tell you that it works, but I had the misfortune of closing a cut on my fingers when I was a lot younger. Let's just say my fingers stay locked together for a few days. Try explaining that one to your friends and teachers on why you're already-terrible hand-writing somehow got worse. I'm pretty sure that's all I wanted to discuss with you guys. Maybe I missed something, but at the moment, it escapes me.

Inspiration for this chapter aside, the reason this one is out a day early is simply because I'm not available at all tomorrow. Once work is over, I have to head straight to my house, shower off, and then head straight to a Brewers game. Yes, we're tailgating. Yes, beer will be drunk. Yes, brats will be eaten. Yes, I will get sunburnt because it'll be damn near 90 the entire day. Damn, I love summer, but I love it more that everything is getting back to normal.

Speaking of chapter uploads, Chapter 15 will get published on 6/15 while chapter 16 gets it on 6/26. Oh, and special thanks to jurrassicdinodrew for leaving a review last time. Thanks, dude!

As always, the characters used in this story are the property of SEGA, Sonic Team, and Archie Comics. Everything in the story is being used strictly for entertainment purposes. And as always, I will talk to y'all later.