Chapter Five: Plant the Truth

James awoke from his slumber half-expecting Sirius to be looking down upon him and grinning like a fool.

It was very odd. He'd gotten so used to the sound of Sirius's snores that waking up without them was… well, odd. Even during the summers, when they'd both stay up late and sleep in till noon, Sirius's snoring was unbelievable.

He sighed and rose on his bed. He was in the Head's Tower, he remembered now. There would be no Sirius to wake him up.

James showered and dressed. His new room was nearly an exact replica of the boys' dormitories back in Gryffindor Tower, except that it was slightly smaller. All this space, just for one person. Swinging his schoolbag over his shoulder, he exited the dorm. He eyed Lily's door for a moment, and he considered waking her up.

Smiling at the thought of what she'd do to him if he barged into her room mid-sleep, James forced himself down to Gryffindor Tower. He'd never admit it to them, but he missed the Marauders terribly already.

He rounded a corner and found himself face to face with the Fat Lady. She looked down at him impassively.

"Password?"

James scratched his nose. "Er… Fovea leonum, wasn't it?"

"Correct," said the Fat Lady airily, and she swung open like a door, revealing a large, circular hole in the wall through which James climbed.

The Gryffindor common room was bustling about with students all hurrying to get down to breakfast. James pulled himself out of the way and ascended the stairs that led up to his former dorm.

He pushed the door open and was immediately blinded by a flash of white light. He shielded his eyes; he felt something large and fuzzy engulf his body as excited shouts and muffled laughs filled his ears. James, surprised, tried to fight it off, but the blanket stuck to him like a bowtruckle to a tree.

"I reckon that's a bit too much, don't you think?" said a weary voice.

"Nah, he's all right," said another, this one closest to James.

"Do the water thing!" exclaimed someone else; his voice was high and squeaky.

"No, that's enough, you two," said the first voice sternly. "Sirius, let him go."

He felt the blanket fall; he blinked, trying to adjust to the sudden brightness.

"Prongs!" Sirius launched forwards and wrapped him in a hug. "I missed you, you prat!"

"Gerroffme," muttered James, shaking himself so that Sirius would let go. "What in Merlin's name were you doing?"

Sirius let go and James stepped back, still blinking, and his friends came into focus. There was Peter, beaming excitedly, and Remus, who was looking taller than ever, and then Sirius, who had on a mischievous look about his face. James smoothed down his robes and straightened his glasses.

"Sorry, Prongs," said Remus sheepishly. "I tried to stop them."

"How'd you know I was coming, anyway?" asked James.

In answer, Remus held up a large collage of parchment with various moving dots with words too small for James to see – The Marauder's Map, of course. James groaned inwardly as he thought that he'd be seeing much less of it, now that he was living in a different part of the castle.

"Breakfast, then?" asked Remus, "I'm starving."

Ten minutes later, the Marauders marched into the Great Hall. They seated themselves on the benches and started filling their plates; James helped himself to a few slices of toast and some eggs.

Before he could take a bite, three girls entered the Great Hall, and one called out his name. "Oi, Potter!"

James looked at his food sadly and turned around to meet Marlene. "Yeah?"

She slid onto the bench next to him before answering, by which time James had finally eaten. "Listen – when're you holding trials?"

It took a moment before James could figure out what she meant. "Oh – Quidditch? I… er, actually haven't thought about it."

Marlene the Seeker made a tut-tutting sound. "Well, decide quickly then, because somehow I ended up with this list –" and she thrust a long piece of parchment under his nose with names that he did not recognize "– McGonagall reckons that there are thirty new people waiting."

James took the list and scanned it quickly. Blimey, he thought, there were tons of people trying out. Usually, there would be no more than 10 or 15. He turned back to Marlene.

"Today's Friday, isn't it?"

"Yep," she said, spreading marmalade over her toast.

James glanced at the list. "I'll hold trials on Sunday, then."

"Right," she took a bite out of her toast. "What do we need, anyway? A new chaser, a beater –?"

"– And a keeper," finished James. "Frank Longbottom is irreplaceable, but I suppose new blood won't hurt."

"I heard Harley Johnson's a good chaser," offered Marlene.

James finished his eggs and continued to his toast. "Johnson – that fourth year?"

They continued their talk about Quidditch until the owls came soaring in through the upper windows. Screeching and hooting, they descended all over the Hall, carrying letters and packages. Morgoth was nowhere to be seen, but a large tawny owl landed in front of him, bringing James the latest edition of the Daily Prophet. He placed a knut into its outstretched talon. The owl hooted once and took off, taking a slice of Sirius's bacon in the process.

"Why is it always me?" muttered Sirius. James sniggered. The sound of his laugh made him turn to James, a surprised look in his face.

"Oh yeah, which reminds me – your present!"

James stopped laughing. "Come again?"

Sirius plunged his hands into the insides of his robes, apparently searching for something. "Your start-of-term present, I totally forgot about it!"

"Sirius, I was joking. You don't have to –"

But Sirius then extracted a small bag from under his blazer, a triumphant look in his face. James eyed him confusedly. "A mokeskin pouch?"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "No, you prat, it's – oh, just wait a moment."

Sirius shook the pouch, and James was surprised to hear a rattling sound, coming from something much bigger than what you could store in a small purse. Sirius put a hand inside it and felt around; it reached all the way to his shoulder, and to James it looked as though something was eating his arm.

Remus laughed at the sight of him. "You look ridiculous, Padfoot."

Sirius shot him a frown, but then his face morphed into a gleeful expression and he pulled his arm slowly from the pouch. James held his breath; what was he going to give him? He'd only gotten Sirius a single jelly bean!

Sirius extracted something long and polished. James's insides squirmed and flipped. Marlene turned her head to watch.

"Here we are!"

It was beautiful, thought James as he took it from Sirius, his hands shaking slightly. Its dark mahogany handle had the words Nimbus: One inscribed on its side. Its hazel twigs glinted brightly in the sun. The metal braces circling around the mid-handle were cool to the touch, and to James it looked suspiciously like –

"Goblin-wrought iron, that," said Sirius, pleased with James's reaction. "First of its kind. That thing's got about as much protection as a knight in full armour."

"How did you get the money for this, Sirius?" asked James disbelievingly.

"Oh, I didn't get it," laughed Sirius. "It was your dad, Prongs, I only pitched in a galleon."

James frowned. "Somehow I don't feel that bad about not getting you a decent present anymore."

He pushed his plate and glass aside and placed the broomstick on the breakfast table. Marlene was examining it carefully, and even Alice and Lily were eyeing it with interest.

At that moment, Professor McGonagall walked up to their little group, carrying a handful of laminated papers. She did a double-take once she saw James's broom, and, after giving them the timetables, she congratulated him and offered to take the broom to the broomshed.

James accepted the offer, thinking that that would prevent him from distracting himself. As McGonagall walked away, carrying his broom, he grabbed his copy of the Daily Prophet and skimmed through it.

"Anything interesting?" asked Peter.

"Nothing," said James, frowning slightly. "You'd think, that with all this Voldemort business going on, the Prophet would be reporting something worthwhile –"

"Oh, cheer up, you," said Lily playfully, who had moved from her seat and was now standing behind him and Sirius, "don't be so damned depressing."

"I'm only being realistic, Lily," he said reprovingly.

"Can't you just be happy that for once, there isn't something about Death Eaters in the news –"

"Well, we can't ignore every problem, can we, Miss Ignoramus –"

"Oh, stop arguing, you two," said Sirius, for Lily had opened her mouth to retort. "Let's just forget it, yeah?"

Lily sighed, but shrugged all the same. "Shall we go to Potions, then?"

James glanced at the staff table. Professor McGonagall was already there, looking disgruntled. She and Dumbledore and Professor Flitwick looked to be in deep conversation, all sporting the same, grave look. James wondered what that was about.

He glanced at his newspaper. James had a sneaking suspicion that something was going on.

A large, metallic bell rang, and the Gryffindors went down to the dungeons to begin their potions lesson. Inside, Professor Slughorn was already writing on the blackboard.

"Good morning, Professor," said Lily as she and the rest of the Gryffindors found a table together near the front.

"Hello, my dear Lily," said Slughorn distractedly, "had a good summer, I trust?"

"Oh yes, sir," nodded Lily earnestly.

Giving them all one last smile, Slughorn went to the blackboard, where he welcomed the N.E.W.T students warmly.

"Good morning, all," said Slughorn, "I'm sure you're going to be hearing a lot about how important your N.E.W.T tests will be, so I'm not going to bother. We have a tricky potion ahead of us, a potion that will take the better part of a month to mature, one that is essential to Auror work should any of you consider it a path. I am, of course, talking about Veritaserum, a potion I am sure you are all familiar with. Now, who can tell me about its effects – yes, Lily?"

James was struck around his glasses as Lily shot her hand up. She whispered a quick "Sorry!" to him, and James smiled amusedly as he listened to her, "Veritaserum is, to put it simply, the world's most powerful truth serum. Colourless and odourless, it's near impossible to distinguish from water, except for the way it ripples near the bottom of its container."

Slughorn smiled genuinely. "Excellent Lily, take 5 points to Gryffindor. Now, can anyone tell me why, since Veritaserum is acknowledged as the most powerful truth potion in the world, it is considered unethical and unreliable to use? Mainly... during Ministry trials? Court? Can anyone tell me why Ministry officials don't just force suspected criminals into drinking Veritaserum?"

Lily did not raise her hand this time, nor did anyone else in the class. James, however, was thinking hard and fast. He thought his answer through, and, deciding that it didn't sound like complete rubbish, raised his hand.

"No one?" asked Slughorn, a bit disappointed, "Well, then – oh, yes, go on, Mr Potter."

"While Veritaserum's effects aren't doubted by anybody," began James, and though he did not know it, Lily was eyeing him appreciatively, "the actual truth, when taken from a person, is complicated. Someone who's being interrogated will just tell them what they believe is the truth. Which isn't necessarily the, er... actual truth. Moreover, Veritaserum's effects can be countered by drinking its antidote beforehand, or by using Occlumency. Some witches and wizards have also been shown to have enough tolerance against it."

"Fantastic, Mr Potter, very good," Slughorn nodded approvingly, "5 points to Gryffindor. The truth, as Mr Potter has put it, is complicated. Veritaserum is not the most reliable of potions, and I myself have found to be quite resistant to its effects. But that is enough trivia, now..."

Slughorn waved his wand, and the cupboard swung open. A bunch of ingredients flew out slowly and divided equally into the tables occupied by the N.E.W.T students. "Take out your cauldron and tools, as well as your copies of Very Advanced Potionmaking, and turn to page twelve. The ingredients I have provided are more than enough for ten students in one table. You will find the instructions in the book, as well as some tips and guidance on the blackboard, should you encounter any trouble. You may begin."

James did as Slughorn had told them to, and had already filled his cauldron with alcohol and water from their ingredients. He perused his book as he worked, and once or twice glanced at the blackboard for tips, which included a revised amount of powdered moonstone (4 spoonfuls, not 3, as well as other similar advice) and by the end of the class he had achieved the exact 'light shade of blue, akin to the sky' as the book had described. Slughorn walked around, examining their potions, and had said an 'excellent, Mr/Ms' to only a handful of students: James, Lily, and Snape.

"Well done, to all of you!" said Slughorn, though he eyed Peter and Marlene, whose potions had somehow taken on the texture of wet cement. "That was a very acceptable first attempt at Veritaserum. Leave your cauldrons here, under the shade –" he indicated towards a large empty bookcase behind his desk, "– I shall tend to them. Homework: a foot and a half of the uses of Veritaserum, as well as theories as to how it could be utilized more effectively. Dismissed!"

James, Sirius, and Marlene all had a free double period after potions, while the rest of the 7th year Gryffindors went off to either Ancient Runes or Divination. They spent the hour and a half playing Exploding Snap with the 6th years before the bell rang and he went off to Transfiguration, where all 7th year Gryffindors were present.

Professor McGonagall had, unfortunately, reminded them about the importance of the upcoming tests. James and Sirius glanced at each other and shared a quiet smile as McGonagall spoke. Once she'd finished, she had set them to transfiguring live rabbits into objects of much bigger size – namely, desks, bed frames, and drawers. James and Sirius found no trouble with this, and they were the first ones to transform their identical rabbits into a single bunk bed by stacking them on top of each other. Professor McGonagall had reluctantly awarded them both 10 points.

The rest of the day passed quickly in James's opinion. He didn't even remember having lunch. He and Lily faced their first challenge as Heads when they found a couple of second-year Hufflepuffs playing hooky in an unused classroom.

"... and don't ever let us catch you skipping class ever again!" bellowed Lily after the retreating backs of the small Hufflepuffs. James laughed.

"Well done, Lils, I think you've scared them into next year," snorted James, earning him a light slap on his shoulder.

"I wasn't that mean, was I?" asked Lily, frowning slightly.

"No, you were fine," said James sarcastically, earning him another slap and a hair ruffle.

That evening found James lounging on one of the couches in the Heads' common room with the rest of the Marauders around the table, working on their potions essays. Actually, thought James, as he glanced around at his friends, it was only Sirius who was working, as he and Remus had already finished it, and Peter had ultimately given up.

He listened to the sweet sound of a frustrated, curse-spouting Sirius as he begged the both of them to hand him their essays. Remus had adamantly refused, saying that copying off of each other would lead to bad habits.

"Oh, come on! A little peek! You know you want to, Prongs!"

James laughed. "No, I don't think I do, thanks," he said, and then took out the Marauders Map from inside his robes.

"What I don't understand, Padfoot," said Remus, raising an eyebrow at Sirius, "is how you could brew the Animagus potion, one of the hardest potions to make, but then struggle with Veritaserum."

Sirius scoffed. "Animagi are actually interesting, Moony, whereas Veritaserum is a bunch of rubbish. You really think that I'm gonna be on the receiving end of a truth potion? I'm not going to become some criminal."

Remus rolled his eyes. "If you'd heard Slughorn at all, you'd know that criminals don't usually get a dose of Veritaserum, Padfoot."

Sirius gave a cry of frustration. "Come on, just tell me what the sodding answers are, I want to look at the map-"

"You'll get a look when you've finished your essay," said Remus pointedly, who had shoved James's head out of the way as he sat down next to him and browsed the map too.

"Besides, Padfoot, you've seen the map dozens of times, what makes you think this time will be any different?" said Peter, who had moved to behind their sofa.

Sirius opened his mouth, then closed it, then opened it again, "Well, it took us a long time to make it! Besides, it was my idea. I'm the rightful owner of the map."

At this, the others exploded into protests as they reminded Sirius, yet again, that it had been a joint project, that it had required some of the most complex magic that any of them had ever cast and that it wouldn't have been finished without all four of them working together.

Well, thought James privately, it had mostly been me, Padfoot and Moony. Wormtail just sat around acting like moral support…

"Methinks I'm still the rightful owner," said Sirius reproachfully.

James rolled his eyes. "Just get back to your essay, Pads. And the rest of you lot better keep quiet, Lily's about to enter."

A few moments after he had said that, the painting swung open to reveal the Head Girl, looking content and sleepy.

"Hi," the four boys greeted her automatically.

"Hey," greeted Lily back, slightly overwhelmed by the presence of them all. "Working on an essay, Black? I thought Remus was the studious one."

Sirius shot a scathing look at Lily, who laughed heartily. She then climbed the stairs and was about to enter her room before she turned back to James.

"Don't stay up too late, all right James?" she said, and James instantly turned his head towards her. " Professor Dumbledore wants to meet with us tomorrow in the morning."

"Again?" replied James, checking his watch and seeing that it was already 10 o'clock. "I won't stay up late, then. Are you going to sleep?"

"I am, yeah," replied Lily.

"Good night, then."

"'Night, James, and you lot as well, I suppose," and she shut the door behind her.

James glanced around at his friends, who were keeping rather straight faces. "What?"

"Nothing!" said Remus, though he did try to hide a smile behind his hand. "So, any success yet, James?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Never mind," interrupted Peter quickly. "You know, it is getting rather late for a school night. Maybe we should go back to the tower."

Sirius scoffed. "It's only a date with Albus, Prongs is fine with us staying, right?"

James rolled his eyes at him, "I'm not actually, Padfoot. I'm feeling rather tired myself." James yawned wide, then spoke to Remus, "When's the next full moon? I'm itching to stretch my legs a bit."

Remus pondered for a bit, "Let me think – oh yeah, there's one on the 28th, about four weeks from now."

"Good, that's something to look forward to, then."

"For you, maybe," said Remus darkly, "me, on the other hand..."

"Ah, cheer up, Moons," said Sirius, abandoning his essay and placing his head on James's knee, "you'll have us to keep you company."

The four of them spent a few more minutes enjoying each other's company, talking, joking, when they all collectively yawned, and they decided that the night was getting fairly old.

Lily rapped her knuckles smartly on the surface of James's door. "James!"

There was no sound. She envied him for his ability to sleep soundly.

Lily sighed. If he didn't wake up soon, they'd be late. Professor Dumbledore had insisted on meeting them both at 7 in the morning, and while she'd agreed like a sheep yesterday she was starting to think that maybe she ought to have negotiated a bit more.

Lily raised her hand, pounding the door again. "James, come on! We're going to be late!"

When the door didn't open, Lily closed her eyes and prayed to Merlin; she took out her wand.

"Don't say I didn't warn you, James! Alohomora!"

The handle turned with a click. She barged in, peeking between her fingers, and she found James's figure covered head to toe in his blanket, like a corpse in a coffin. He was still fast asleep.

"JAMES!"

The Head Boy thrashed and gave a sort of strangled yell. Two long sticks popped out from where his head should have been, but before Lily could get a closer look, they vanished just as quickly and James flipped over to see who had woken him up.

Lily and James stared at each other for a moment – he was clad only in his briefs, which might have added to the awkwardness, and then Lily gave a muffled apology and bolted out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

She leaned against the railing. Her heart was beating so quickly she was sure it would jump out and scold her for being so stupid. A near-naked James Potter was not something she was ready to see in the early hours of the morning.

Lily glanced at her watch and her stupid heart skipped a beat: it was 6:54. Dumbledore's office was miles away from the Head's tower.

She looked at James's door, resigning herself to enter again if he didn't come out in the next ten seconds. She counted slowly, tapping her fingers against her robes, and once she'd reached twelve she marched to his door and was about to start assaulting it when it opened, revealing the messy-haired, bespectacled James Potter.

James grinned at her. There was a bit of sleep in his eyes that he hadn't rubbed away. "Shall we go, then?"

"You've just made us late!" seethed Lily, ignoring him. "Come on, you prat!"

She grabbed his arm and marched towards the painting of the two wizards; it swung open and they both climbed through, Lily dragging James in the direction of Dumbledore's office.

"Lily –"

"No talking until we get there, James."

"But –"

"We're already late, James! We have to hurry!"

"Lily." James gently tugged his hand out of hers. She hadn't even realized she was still holding it. "Just stop for a minute, all right?"

Lily stood, her arms crossed and eyeing him impatiently. James bent down, tying his shoes while whistling absently.

"Are you done?" she asked haughtily. James glanced at her and smirked.

He stood up, and Lily noticed how much taller he was than her – at least a head in difference.

Ignoring her butterflies, Lily turned on her heel. "Come on, then."

This time, James grabbed her hand, sending goosebumps all the way up to her elbow. "Just calm down, will you? We're not going to be late."

James let go and turned to the wall. They were still on the same floor, and Dumbledore's office was two floors below. James tapped a brick with his wand – it giggled, as though he'd tickled it – it shook slightly, and it fell away, making a hole – the hole grew wider and wider until it formed a passage large enough to fit a small troll. It was dimly lit, though by what she couldn't see.

"Come on, then," teased James in a voice several octaves higher, and Lily, who'd been standing there with her mouth slightly open, slapped his shoulder and followed James through the hole.

"Where does this go?" asked Lily. James glanced back.

"Straight to that corridor. You know, the one behind Zamira the Zealous's portrait?"

She racked her brains as she tried to remember where Zamira the Zealous's painting was. "But… isn't that on the second floor? We're on the fourth, how on Earth –?"

"It's best not to question it, Lily," said James. They continued to walk through the passage for a few seconds, until at last James held up his wand and tapped the wall to their left.

"Here we are," he said triumphantly.

They rounded a corner and said hi to Zamira, who was too busy sleeping to notice them. Soon, they found themselves just outside of the stone gargoyle guarding Dumbledore's office.

Lily looked at her watch. "A minute left to spare. Shall we go up?"

They said the password to the gargoyle and climbed the spiralling stairs of Dumbledore's chambers. They came face-to-face with the brass door, and Lily knocked on it lightly.

"Come in," said a weary, tired voice.

They pushed open the door and found Dumbledore seated behind his desk, a grey look on his face.

This can't be good, thought Lily. She and James took their usual seats and waited.

Dumbledore looked at them both sadly. "Lord Voldemort has attacked."

Her stomach dropped. She had not been expecting that. Praying that Voldemort didn't know where Cokeworth was, she forced herself to speak. "Where, Professor?"

The Headmaster tapped something with his wand, and one of his many silver instruments whirred to life; it spewed green smoke that rippled and shimmered and formed into an image. It had been taken from high up, yet Lily couldn't help the slight gasp that slipped through her mouth as she realized what it was.

"The Hogwarts Express?" whispered James, looking horrified.

The Hogwarts Express had fallen on its side as though a giant had knocked it over. It reminded Lily unpleasantly of the train toys she used to play with as a child. Nearly all of the carriages had been damaged to an extent – melted and peppered with holes and looking as though a huge sword had run it through.

"Indeed," said Dumbledore grimly. "It appears that Voldemort attacked it after it had departed for London; the only person on the train was Theodore Plant."

She didn't recognize the name. James, however, sat up straighter, a startled frown on his face.

"Theodore Plant?" he asked. "The conductor? Why would Voldemort want anything to do with him?"

Dumbledore gave them both a grave look. "The Ministry is working to find that out as we speak, I assure you. Theodore Plant was a great friend of Professor Slughorn. He was a good man."

"Was?" said Lily. "But, Professor – you make it sound like he's already –"

"There were signs of struggle and bloodshed in the train," said Dumbledore. "His body has not yet been recovered. Minister Minchum has pronounced him dead – until proven otherwise."

Dumbledore sighed, and for a moment it struck Lily just how old he looked – ancient and worn.

"So much has happened, so early on in the year," he said sadly. "It did not occur to me that he would try to attack the train; Hogwarts, yes, but not the train."

"Professor – you said that the train was empty except for Plant," said James, "Why would he attack when no one was on board?"

"I believe he merely wanted to frighten people," answered Dumbledore, "Anxious parents will read the news this morning and fear for their children's safety. An aura of terror has seeped into the wizarding community, which is what I am sure he was after. So far, Voldemort is winning."

Dumbledore leaned forwards and slashed his wand through the smoke-image; it dissipated and faded into the air.

"Once this morning's edition of the Daily Prophet reaches Hogwarts, Voldemort's sympathisers – if they do not already know – will try and take it upon themselves to continue his work. I will not have that in my school."

The Headmaster regarded them both with his piercing blue eyes. "I must ask you to be on your guard, for they will try to attack any person in a position of authority. I must also request that you start your patrols next week; that way, we will ensure that no one is out wandering at night."

Fawkes whistled a low, gloomy tune. Dumbledore smiled bitterly.

"I'm sorry to have put so much pressure on your shoulders, the both of you," he murmured.

"That's all right, Professor," said James hurriedly, "We understand."

The Headmaster leaned back in his chair and bid them goodbye. Right then, Lily saw a different man – he was still Dumbledore, but not the Dumbledore she had known for so long. He looked vulnerable and worried, human – not at all like an all-powerful wizard capable of solving their problems. She appreciated then just how hard a job being Headmaster could be.

"Hogwarts Express crash," read Lily aloud. "Theodore Plant, conductor of Hogwarts Express, presumed dead at 87."

It was late afternoon on the same day that Dumbledore had called them. She and James strolled on the outskirts of the castle, following the rocky path that led to Hagrid's. The Gamekeeper, though, had gone out to the Forbidden Forest some time ago, so their usual weekly tea would have to be postponed for later. However, in a stroke of genius, James had suggested they have a picnic, which she'd readily agreed to. And so it was that they found themselves stopping by the beech tree near the lake, James laying out the food and her still reading from the newspaper.

"Death Eaters were involved in the derailment and destruction of the train tracks, which caused Theodore Plant, conductor of the Hogwarts express, to veer off course," continued Lily. "His body has not been recovered. The train had been making its return journey to London, and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named himself was said to have appeared personally."

"Stop that," chided James. "You're late to the party, anyway. Everyone's been quoting that so much it's ingrained into my brain."

"I know," said Lily. "I just like annoying you."

"Har-har."

"But it is rather tiring to hear," relented Lily, "Em and Sirius won't shut up about it, it's driving me mad. Probably why Mary and Alice have disappeared from the dorms."

"And Marlene?"

"Oh, she's busy trying to get them with a Silencing Charm," said Lily matter-of-factly. "She's never been good for tact, that girl."

"Well, considering she lived with you for the better part of six years, I'm not surprised," sniggered James. "And, by the way, I'd appreciate it if you could Conjure a blanket. I don't much fancy sitting on dirty leaves."

She did as he asked, flourishing her wand; a white cloth, patterned with red stripes, appeared out of the end. James took it and smoothed it on the ground and laid out the various plates and cups. She sat down across him, brushing off the twirling golden leaves that fell from the beech tree.

Autumn had always been her favourite season. She loved everything about it: from the trees, dressed in their carnival colours; the earthy smell that came from the leaves, both on the ground and on the trees; how the day couldn't decide between being cold and hot. She especially loved taking long walks to Hagrid on lazy afternoons, preferably with a certain messy-haired, bespectacled boy. Autumn came with regal ease, content to arrive with a slow grace.

"Tea?" offered James, levitating the smoking pot. "Let's see… I brought pumpkin juice as well, but I know you don't really like it."

"Tea's fine," said Lily absently. She tossed the newspaper over to the basket, where it lay forgotten as the two of them ate.

The food that James had packed was delicious: biscuits and muffins that went excellently with the tea, as well as a sliced baguette, complete with different kinds of meat, cheese and vegetables.

James lay down on his back while still chewing his sandwich, which made Lily want to scold him for being reckless. He waved his wand in midair, drawing idly with it, though the chilly wind blew away the traces before Lily could make out what he was drawing. With his messy hair, lopsided glasses and his crumpled jumper, he looked to all the world like a normal boy.

She leaned against the tree, watching the rest of the students mill about not too far from them. Her heart felt strangely light; something about spending time with James did that to her. She'd noticed that last year, ever since he'd apologised to her.

She reminisced their moments together. Ever since the lake incident (which, she thought amusedly, had occurred just a few feet away from where they sat) James had been strangely subdued. She'd spent the summer after feeling depressed and moping about, for she no longer had Severus to keep her company. She didn't see him at all that summer, for which she was grateful, but she realized then just how lonely she was at home.

Of course, summer only lasted for two months and she was right back at Hogwarts before she knew it. She remembered, however, just how distraught she had been during the beginning of her sixth year, and it was only Marlene and Alice and the rest of her dormmates that really understood what she was going through. She'd just lost her friend, for Merlin's sake.

And then, on September 2nd, she'd started a new friendship with a boy she had previously detested (someone she had secretly liked and found funny, though she wasn't going to tell that to anybody), and Lily slowly started to get better. In no time, she and James had become very good friends.

She cherished the moments they spent together, whether it was studying by the fireplace or having a picnic by the lake, like they were doing right now. She came to appreciate James Potter – the real James, the one who made her laugh her butt off, the one who made her heart pound like a train down the tracks…

Of course, her sixth year wasn't all sunshine and daisies. There'd been a good amount of irritation and jealousy (on her part, at least, though she didn't want to admit that). She'd always known that James was competitive, but Merlin he couldn't let her catch a break even when they were in class. Ever since becoming friends with him, she'd realized just how close the gap between them was; Lily, who was famous at school for her studious habits, was struck dumb when she had her first study session with James. He studied like his life depended on it, and it annoyed her to no end when she saw him the next day, looking bright and chirpy and not at all like he'd stayed up till two in the morning. At least now she could safely assume that his good grades weren't just due to natural talent.

And then there was the subject of jealousy. Oh, cruel, cruel jealousy. She'd felt it when she saw him with other girls; Em and Mary had teased her scathingly various times, but she felt none would come as close as seeing Marlene's smug face of victory after Lily hexed Ella Davies for getting too touchy-touchy with James. She vaguely remembered having a nice chat with Sirius about her feelings. He had been understanding and polite, which further confirmed her suspicions that it had been a figment of her imagination.

Figment or not, there had been one thing that didn't make sense in their conversation: Sirius had told her that James still liked her. He hadn't asked her out ever since that day in the lake, and he'd stopped pulling stupid pranks to get her attention; she'd sincerely doubted that then. She wished she hadn't. Then she wouldn't be dealing with these feelings of uncertainty and unease.

And if he did like her, he did a very good job of hiding it. He acted like himself around her – meaning that he considered her no more than a friend. She wanted to applaud him – she was frustrated and jealous and he continued to act the same way he always did. That wasn't to say that she didn't like the way he acted; James was wonderful, and an amazing person, but still…

"Lily? Lily, I'm talking to you, are you still there?"

"What?"

She looked around at James, who was staring up at her from the ground, the last bite of his sandwich already in his mouth.

"What do you think?" said James. "About the attacks?"

"What I think…"

"Yeah," said James, sounding concerned. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," she said softly, meeting his eyes for the first time. "Er… what I think about…?"

"We're going around in circles, you know that, right? Voldemort and the train, I'm asking what you think about it."

"Hmm," she said, even more quietly, "I think you're wonderful."

James's eyebrows shot so far into his hair that for a moment, Lily wanted to laugh. Then she realized what she'd said, and gradually the feeling of wanting to run away and hide solidified even more in her.

"That's… a bit off-topic, isn't it?" he said at last, his voice low and gruff.

He flipped over so that he was on his stomach, pushing away all the empty plates and cups. He appeared to be studying her, as if debating whether or not she'd meant the words. Lily stayed silent, trying to look as though she was very interested in an ant that was carrying a crumb of bread.

"Well, I think I'm wonderful as well," said James, grinning. "Took you long enough to admit that, though."

Before Lily could say that she had been lying, after all, a loud WOOF made her and James jump ten feet in the air. She leaned her back against the tree, breathing hard, only to see a great, shaggy black dog bounding up to them, its fur blowing against the wind and its long tail wagging merrily.

Recognizing the dog, she laughed in relief as it knocked her to the ground, licking her face. She felt its wet tongue slobber all over her clothes, its large snout messing up her scarf, and then the dog turned to James and barked excitedly.

"This is Snuffles," said Lily, readjusting her jumper. "I met him last year, when I was helping Hagrid with his pumpkins."

"Snuffles?" said James incredulously, throwing the dog a bewildered look. "Is that what they call you these days?"

Lily frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Never mind," said James, running a hand through his hair. "Way to kill the mood, Snuffles. She just admitted I was wonderful."

"Oh, shut up, you," said Lily, rolling her eyes. "I meant it in a purely platonic sense, in that you're wonderful at Transfiguration and Quidditch and all that rubbish you're good at."

"Riiight," said James, stretching out the syllables, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes. "Anyway, it doesn't look like Hagrid's leaving the forest anytime soon. We should head back to the castle. Care to join me in the Gryffindor common room?"

"Another study session?" asked Lily. "Honestly, from the way you look, no one would guess that you actually care about school. You're worse than Alice."

"Alice is in a different league comprised entirely of herself," said James. "Right, Snuffles, you can go back to doing… whatever wild dogs do during fall. See you."

And then they trudged back up to the castle, Snuffles following discreetly behind them.

"So, Mister Wonderful, how was your date?" said Sirius. "I see she's already started complimenting you, how long should my speech be as best man?"

James rolled his eyes. "Piss off, Snuffles."

They were supposed to be at dinner, but Sirius had pulled him aside to go for another walk. He'd mumbled something incoherent to Lily, saying that he'd join her later in the common room, and so he set off with Snuffles in human form down the empty third-floor corridor, away from the talk and laughter.

Sirius gave a bark of laughter. "Yeah, I forgot to mention that little nickname to you. Guess I forgot I have a double life."

"Yeah, only you didn't forget and just didn't want to tell me."

"Maybe." Sirius's grin was mischievous and crooked. "Look, I'm sorry I interrupted you both. Marly saw you head down and told me to bother you, and it was the perfect opportunity…"

"Since when do you listen to Marlene, of all people?" said James incredulously, "You don't even listen to me."

"She's nice," said Sirius simply. "And unlike you, she actually likes to sit on my lap."

"You've been dating her on and off for over two years now," murmured James, "and all you can say is that she's nice?"

"You forgot the likes to sit on my lap part."

"That, too."

They stopped short of one of the alcoves that had been carved into the wall; it was the perfect place to enjoy a nice, long conversation without any interruptions from meddlesome teachers. Sirius thought so too, apparently, and he sat down with his usual air of elegance and grace that James had never quite managed to pull off.

"There's actually something I wanted to talk about with you," said Sirius anxiously, scratching his head. "I didn't want the others to hear…"

James stared out the window. The night was just beginning to set in and the grounds were nearly empty and dark, except for one flickering light coming from Hagrid's cabin. "Spit it out, then."

Sirius took a deep breath. He opened his mouth then closed it again, frowning thoughtfully. James waited; he knew he couldn't rush Sirius when he was talking about something serious.

"My brother, Regulus," he said at last, "he said to me – before I left the house, he said – he wanted to be like Bellatrix, follow in her footsteps…"

"You've told me this before," said James, frowning, "Something change?"

"No… I've just been reminded again," said Sirius. "The people involved in the attack… Bellatrix was probably among them, and other Blacks, too."

"And you're thinking about how you're related to them," guessed James. "How they're your family, and that when people think about the Blacks, they also think about you, too."

Sirius nodded. "No matter how you look at it, I'm still a Black, Prongs. The people here, Hogwarts…" he took a deep breath. "Even in our first year, all the teachers could talk about me was how I was sorted into Gryffindor. Six years later, and they still talk about it. People whisper... they point at me as if I'm some sort of freak. People still associate me with my blood family, because of all this stupid mania…"

James raised an eyebrow. "Blood means nothing, Sirius. How many times has Dad said that to you?"

"Even if it did mean nothing," pressed Sirius, leaning his head against the wall, "people still wouldn't see past that. They'd still see me as a Black."

"Well, I don't, and I don't see why you should either, if you don't want to," said James. "As far as I'm concerned, you're a Potter."

Sirius managed a grudging smile. "Great-uncle Charlus would be proud."

"I haven't heard that name in years," said James, surprised. "Wasn't he the one who –"

"– Passed the House Elf protection laws, yeah," smirked Sirius. "Mum and Dad hated him."

They stayed silent after that. The moon was especially beautiful that night; freshly born after a full phase just a few days ago. It cast its silvery light onto the grounds, illuminating it in a rather ghostly fashion.

James wondered what Sirius was thinking about. He rarely talked about how he felt, and if he did it was always short and blunt. To have to live with the fact that his own family name would keep dragging him down – James couldn't imagine it.

"I'm fine, you know," said Sirius quietly, as though he had heard his thoughts. "I know that I'm not going to – to turn out like Bellatrix and the others. I just wish I could've done more for Regulus."

"I'm sure you did all you could, Padfoot," said James. "He's going to have to choose his own path eventually. You can't always be an older brother to him."

Sirius shook his head. "I know there's good in him. The Sorting Hat hesitated for a reason, you know. I'm going to try and older-brother him around a little more."

There was the sound of the usual thousand students down in the Great Hall all standing up and leaving for the common rooms. James smiled lazily at Sirius.

"Do what you want," he said off-handedly. "Just be careful. Know when to stop. Now if you'll excuse me, I do believe I've promised Lily to study with her."

"I spilt my heart out to you, and now you're ditching me?" said Sirius, mock outraged. "Some friend you are, Mister Wonderful."

"At least I don't have to go around getting called Snuffles," said James.

Sirius frowned.