As the weeks had gone on, the night terrors continued to torment Wanda, the dreams always different and horrifying in equal measure. Sometimes she dreamt of the past- the bomb exploding their apartment to rubble and then her and Pietro clinging to each other as the stared at the second bomb blinking ominously at them, the painful experiments Hydra inflicted on them, losing her brother in Sokovia. Sometimes she dreamt of strange amalgamations of her memories and fears- Ultron destroying her family instead of the bombs, Strucker finding her in the Tower to drag her back to Hydra, Pietro angry and disgusted at her while he bled.

The nightmares were wearing on her and she relied on napping during the daytime when the horrible images seemed to be kept at bay. Guilt weighed heavily on her as she tried to not be a burden to Natasha, but no matter what she did, no matter how she tried to handle things on her own, she would need the woman there in some capacity. She felt bad that every night she woke up the woman, but also relieved to even see her for a brief moment before she would slide back into another terrible dream or stay awake long enough for the sun to stare peeking over the horizon.

But today Wanda did not wake up with a violent jolt, nor did she simply rise with the sun having stayed awake for most of the night. Instead she woke up pressed into something warm and soft, a hand rubbing up and down her arm, "Wanda, time to get up."

"Hm? N'tasha?"

"Yeah milaya. Come on, up and at 'em." The spy sat up and Wanda followed with her, rubbing her eyes. Natasha watched her with a soft, maybe concerned smile, "Did you sleep okay?"

Wanda nodded and she really had. After Natasha had pulled her out of her nightmare and comforted her, Wanda had been able to slip into a dreamless, blue sleep, waking up feeling more rested than she had in quite some time. "Yes.. thank you."

"Wanda.. I meant what I said last night." She tilted Wanda's chin up with her fingertips to ensure she was looking her in the eye. "I want you to be able to come me if you need anything or just need to talk. I won't be mad, or annoyed, or upset. I'm right here, alright?"

The teenager stared into Natasha's honest green eyes for a moment, gauging her sincerity. She did not sense any deception from her, in fact only saw deep understanding and care for her that she could barely comprehend. Wanda thought about Natasha pulling her into her arms and her holding on and the comfort she felt from it, the relief at having a safe place to release her emotions. A part of her still worried about being a burden but having gotten what she needed another part of her did not care and maybe even a slightly bigger part of her realized it was not true. Natasha did not view her a problem, she genuinely seemed to like her and wanted to help. Wanda released a breath she did not know she was holding, "Alright."

Natasha smiled at her and cupped her cheek, repeating her softly, "Alright."

Wanda offered her a timid smile back then dropped her head shyly onto Natasha's shoulder. The woman briefly rested her head against Wanda's and let them sit there for a moment. Finally she moved to get up, "Okay, it's a bit early yet. Do you want to take a shower? Then we can see if Steve will make pancakes this morning."

"Will he?" Wanda asked a little eagerly. She had found out pancakes were Steve's one and only specialty and he took great pride in them, which she thought he should since they were delicious. "With blueberries?"

Natasha grinned at her as she stretched a little, "I think he will. All you have to do is look up at him with those bol'shiye zelenyye glaza and he'll do just about anything."

"Me?" The girl asked as she climbed out of the bed after Natasha, wondering why Steve would specifically cater to her request. Especially since he and Natasha seemed particularly close making Wanda wonder exactly the nature of their relationship; not that she dared ask.

"Yes, you." Natasha laughed lightly, then said a bit more seriously, "He wants to see you happy too."

Wanda paused, again barely able to comprehend someone might care for her. The Black Widow left her with a smile and to her thoughts. Wanda took a shower. Then had blueberry pancakes for breakfast courtesy of Captain Rogers.

/

"Wanda, do you want to go outside?" Natasha asked from where she leaned against the doorway.

The girl looked up from the magazine she had been leafing through. In a cabinet she had found issues of old National Geographics, and it was her new favorite activity to look at all of the pictures from around the world, imagining stories about the places and what it would be like to go there. She was looking at images of underwater caves when Natasha had appeared, asking her question. Wanda stared at her a moment, "Go where?"

"I thought we could just walk around the block. It's a little cold, but it's nice and sunny." Natasha said with a shrug. "You don't have to stay cooped up in the Tower all the time."

Wanda had come to like the Tower; it was safe, and they were high up enough that she did not have to hear and feel all of the people down below. But Natasha was right, she could not stay up here forever. After a minute she replied, "O-okay."

"Okay?" Natasha pushed her to be more certain.

"Yes, let's go on a walk."

"Great," The woman smiled, clearly pleased, and walked over to her, sticking out her hand to help pull her from the armchair she was sitting in. "You'll have to put on some warmer clothes."

Wanda followed Natasha back to their hallway. The older woman told her to go ahead and get dress while she went to her own room to look for hats and gloves for them. Doing as she was told, the teenager went into her bedroom and looked through her closet and drawers. Every time she did it was an overwhelming experience. She had never owned so many pieces of clothing before not even with her parents when they were alive. Her and Pietro had a few outfits that her mother would meticulously wash and mend until they absolutely could not be used anymore. On the street, it had been whatever had been discarded or could be stolen. Then with Hydra they had only worn hospital gown type smocks for years and eventually were given one set of civilian clothing, but anything else had just been a part of Wanda's glamour.

Thinking about what she saw Natasha wearing, she found a pair of blue jeans and pulled the stiff fabric over her legs. Next a dark red thermal shirt and over top of that a black knitted sweater for warmth. Wanda sat on the bed to put on her new combat-style boots over her thick socks. She was taking the army green parka with the fur-lined hood from her closet when Natasha came in. The woman was already wearing her own black parka and gloves. She grinned at Wanda, "You look very nice."

Wanda felt her cheeks turn a little pink at the compliment. The spy came towards her handing her a set of gloves to put on then Natasha pulled a beanie onto her head, playfully pulling it over her eyes before righting it and the Sokovian giggling at her antics as she did so, "Alright, milaya. Let's go."

They headed out to the elevator and rode it down to the bottom floor. It took them to a hallway with a door on the end. Natasha pushed open the door to a vacant back alley which was sealed off with a large black gate that Natasha had to open with some sort of fob that made it clicking sounds as the mechanisms unlocked. Then suddenly they were on the sidewalk in New York City. The older woman had been right, it was a beautiful day with the sun shining and cloudless blue skies. It was still November, though Wanda was not sure of the exact date, and a sharp wind whipped around them, making her glad for her coat, hat, and gloves. Luxuries that were sorely missed on the streets in the brutal Sokovian winters.

The girl froze right outside the gate and glanced around nervously at the people going about their business. She could feel the city pulsing down here. She fortunately had control and was not inundated with thoughts or emotions that were not hers, but there was an incessant hum that got under her skin. Natasha looked at her with a crinkle of concern, "Wanda, what do you need? Do you want to go back up?"

She thought about it but concluded she did not want to go back up to the apartments. The sun felt nice, and the cold air refreshing, and it was as if her body realized she could move again, wanting to stretch and shake off the stagnation from her muscles. It was just the uncomfortable buzzing feeling, making her feel uncertain, like she could not focus. Taking a deep breath, she felt the desire to hold Natasha's hand, that it would help. But would the agent think she was childish for needing to hold her hand? She was taking too long to answer, and Natasha gently reminded her, "Remember what I said? I won't be upset. Do you want to go back up?"

She reiterated the question and Wanda remembered their conversation from the other morning, remembered her insistence that she could ask Natasha for whatever she needed. Slowly, Wanda reached out her hand and grasped Natasha's. The connection grounded her, and the discomfort faded to a more manageable level. It would be better if she could feel her skin against her own but could not bring herself to ask her to take her gloves off as well. The woman looked down at her hands and then back up at Wanda when she said with as much confidence as she could muster, "No, I want to walk."

Natasha gripped her hand firmly as she smiled, "Let's walk then."

They took off down the street hand in hand. Wanda gazed in wonder at the tall buildings and the flurry of traffic and people all moving with a peculiar synchronicity as if they were all a part of a living organism. Natasha talked to her as they moved, telling her about a particular shop or restaurant or saying they would have to visit Central Park sometime soon. Wanda listened intently to her words as they also helped drown out the general din around her. She began to squint into the sun, the brightness of the day starting to bother her eyes. Of course Natasha noticed.

"Here, let's stop a moment." Natasha pulled them out of the flow of people to a kiosk stocked with newspapers, magazines, a variety of snacks, and also a rack of sunglasses. The woman examined them for a moment then picked a pair of round sunglasses with mirrored lens and silver frames. She handed them to Wanda, "Try these on."

She put them on, and the redhead nodded with approval, "Oh yeah, very cool. What do you think?"

Wanda peered in the small mirror along the side of the display. She did not know if they were cool or not, but she trusted Natasha's opinion and they shielded her eyes from the sun. Turning back to the woman she simply said, "Cool."

Natasha smirked at her in apparent amusement and walked over to the counter where a bored looking man sat at a cash register. She told them man they would take the sunglasses, then she took Wanda's hand once and started to walk once again. Most of the buildings around them where office style building, the ground levels nothing but elegantly decorated lobbies. However, sometimes there was a little boutique that they would look in the windows at the clothing styled on the mannequins or a bakery with flour-covered loaves of bread and glazed pastries. Then they came upon a small bookstore and Wanda's interest was piqued. She stared in at the rows of books, her fingers itching to run over the spines like she could in the library at the Tower. She pulled her gaze away and found Natasha already looking at her with an expectant expression on her face. Wanda asked a little sheepishly, "Could we go in?"

"Of course, milaya." The Russian pulled open the door, a little bell dinging as the walked inside. The air in the store was much warmer than outside; Wanda copied Natasha, taking off her hat and gloves and shoving them into her coat pockets along with her new sunglasses. Her hand eagerly sought out Natasha's now that they were uncovered, feeling her warm skin strengthening the soothing effects of the woman. They walked down the aisles this time with Wanda leading them as she dragged a willing Natasha along. She looked at the colorful book jackets and took in the titles recognizing some of the words, already able to read more than she would have previously been able to from just perusing the books at the Tower. Wanda stopped at one book turned out in display. There was a quaint illustration of grassy hills with little homes built into them and she furrowed her brow trying to read the title until it finally clicked.

"The Hobbit. This is the book Steve likes." Wanda recalled the man recommending it. He and Wanda both missed out on much of popular culture- Steve because he was frozen in ice for 70 years and Wanda because she was sequestered in a Hydra base as a human experiment. Having received a myriad of recommendations himself, Steve seemed to enjoy passing along his own recommendations to Wanda, for once not the one completely out of the loop.

"So it is." Natasha picked it up. "Do you want to get it? We're almost done with Little Women."

She said it so casually, like they were simply reading it for fun and not as a way to help Wanda fall back asleep after being woken by terrible nightmares. It had been a little less than a week since they started the ritual of Natasha waking her up, holding her while she cried out her emotions, then reading to her until she fell back asleep wrapped up in the woman's arms, slender fingering carding through her hair. Since then, her quality of sleep had drastically improved and her anxiety around nighttime was waning knowing that Natasha would be there to pull her through.

"Yes, I'd like that." Wanda said but she had to look down to say the words aloud.

Natasha squeezed her hand and let it go, "If we get The Hobbit, we should probably get the Lord of the Rings trilogy too."

She plucked three other books from the shelf and ticked her head in the direction of the checkout, "We'll buy these and then we can do one more thing here before we head back home."

Wanda nodded, nearly ready to get back to the tranquility of being 60 stories in the sky. After paying for the books, Natasha led her to a section of the shop where a little coffee counter with a few tables in front of it was set up. "They have the best hot chocolate here. They use dark chocolate, so it isn't as overwhelming sweet."

"I think I've had it." Wanda tilted her head to the side, trying to remember but it had been so long.

"Well this stuff is the best." Natasha ordered them two hot chocolates, one lighter on the chocolate. The woman was still a wary about giving Wanda anything too rich since she had thrown up the Chinese food not so long ago, which she was grateful for, vomiting had not been fun.

With their paper cups in hand, the pair took a seat at one of the tables. As Wanda took her first sip her eyes widened, "It's so wonderful."

"See, I told you." Natasha grinned at her over the rim of her own cup. The hot chocolate was creamy and sweet with enough bitter to balance it out like Natasha had said and it warmed her stomach as she drank it down. They sat in companionable silence while they enjoyed the beverages and rested for a moment. Then it was time to head home though Wanda regretfully could not finish her drink, feeling her stomach reach its limit. Natasha promised they could look into learning how to make it a home, which made her feel better about parting from the rest of her sweet treat.

They bundled back up and, with Natasha offering her hand to Wanda, stepped out into the late afternoon, the blaring sun beginning to dim as they walked a tad more briskly than their previous pace. They got back to the Tower quicker than Wanda would have thought, having lost track of where Natasha had been taking her. As the woman let them into the gate, Wanda realized the staticky buzz from the streets had nearly completely gone.

Riding up the elevator, the spy observed her with a careful eye, "How are you feeling?"

"Good, it was good." Wanda thought for a moment, remembering all the things she had seen and felt. She said sincerely, "I had a good time, thank you."

"You're welcome, malyshka." The Black Widow seemed happy and a little relieved. When the elevator doors slid open they could immediately hear laughter from somewhere in the apartment. Natasha's eyebrows raised, "Should we go see what that is about?"

The laughter was coming from the kitchen where they found Sam and Sharon taking out ingredients out of the refrigerator. Natasha greeted them, "Hey guys, what are you up to?"

"Nat, Wanda, we're just getting stuff ready to make for dinner." Sam said trying to contain a smile.

"I hear you like to cook, Wanda." Sharon addressed the teenager with an overly kind expression. The Sokovian let the back of her hand brush against the back of Natasha's and nodded. Agent Carter had started to hang around recently, mostly staying for lunch after training session with the others before heading off. She was nice and friendly, but Wanda could not help but feel cautious of the new person.

"My Aunt Angie taught me how to make the best spaghetti and meatballs. Her Nona had taught her, so it's a very old Italian recipe." Sharon explained, "I can show you if you'd like."

Her eyes flitted to Natasha who as always was ready with an encouraging nod, "Go ahead sweetheart. I'm going to put your books in your room."

The redhead departed and Wanda joined Sam and Sharon at the kitchen island to start preparing the meal. Sharon began showing her how to mince the garlic while she forced Sam to dice the onion. Natasha was not gone long, coming back to sit at the kitchen table with a glass of wine and book. They were browning the meatballs before adding them to simmer in the red pasta sauce when Steve joined them, getting a glass of wine as well and sitting next to Natasha. They chatted with one another with their heads inclined slight toward each other as they did so.

Dinner was assembled with relative ease and soon the five of them were seated around the table with plates of pasta and garlic bread. When Wanda would remember the evening, she would remember the warmth of everything. Of the food, of how Sharon talked about her family, of how she told them about the hot chocolate and how Natasha and Steve booed Sam when he made a joke about being called Hot Chocolate in high school, but Sharon laughed delightfully. Of Steve's enthusiasm when she said they bought The Hobbit and of Natasha's face as she wiped pasta sauce off the corner of Wanda's mouth with her napkin.

Then Wanda was in her bed, Natasha sitting on the edge tucking the covers around her shoulders and stroking her hair line, observing, "You're tired."

Her eyes were already shutting as she nodded, "Yes.. good tired."

"Good tired?"

"Yes.. Tasha…" She was drifting off quickly.

The last thing she registered was the woman pressing a kiss to her forehead and whispering, "Goodnight, malyshka."

When Natasha woke her up later in the night from a bad dream, she could not remember what she had been dreaming that had been so bad. She just rolled into Natasha's chest and fell back asleep.

/

Then a few nights later.

Wanda had literally just felt death after her brother had just been killed. She wandered like a hollow shell of a person through the smoldering wreckage of the battle, her world now bleak and filled with immeasurable pain. Then she came upon Ultron's vibranium form in the derailed train car. Her magic instantly swirling around her hands like an angry beehive. She knelt before him.

"Wanda, if you stay here, you'll die." The robot informed her unnecessarily.

"I just did.. Do you know how it felt?" The girl asked him, but she scarcely gave him a moment to consider before her magic was assaulting his chest, ripping at the metal so it groaned and screamed. It bent easily underneath her will and the mechanism that served as his heart leapt out into her hand. She watched the red glow of his eyes fade away as the glow in hers grew, "It felt like that."

Her eyes shut in anguish for a moment, then there was a lurch. Her eyes flew open, and she expected to suddenly be in freefall but instead she found herself looking at a human heart, dripping with blood in her hand. She stared in utter confusion and terror as her sights then fell on who was laid out before her. It was Pietro who gaped at her in fear and betrayal with a large whole in his chest. She had torn her brother's heart out.

Wanda shot up in bed, shouting 'no' over and over again. She tried to remember where she was and that the images in her head were just a dream, but she felt strange, and her face felt wet. Her hands felt wet too. The girl focused on her hands trying to see what was on them. Suddenly it felt as though ice spread in her veins, her stomach becoming a churning void. It was the dark, sticky red blood from her brother's heart. A second later, Wanda unleased a truly horrifying, hauntingly terrified shriek.

/

Translation: *bol'shiye zelenyye glaza = big green eyes (from google translate)