Afterimage

An NCIS drabble

by mew-tsubaki

Note: The NCIS characters belong to Donald P. Bellasario, not to me. Some Nick thoughts & Nick thinking bc I love him so much, kthxbai. ;w; Read, review, and enjoy! *Note: This is set during s19e2, "Nearly Departed," so spoilers ahead.

- ^-^3

It's always crunch time at NCIS. The bottom of the ninth, due date was yesterday, serial killer about to slip through the cracks yet again—these are items of equal weight in the mind of Special Agent Nick Torres, because the pressure and the pace of NCIS is relentless. And he likes relentless.

But it's difficult to stay focused on the task at hand when Torres sits at his desk and finds himself constantly glancing at the vacant chair across the room.

He knows they don't really have any free time right now. Yes, they found "Tom Samuels"—hell, they've got the bastard in Interrogation. But Torres can't concentrate on researching Paul LeMere's fake backgrounds and dead lawyer when his mind is elsewhere and his eyes continue to wander from his computer screen. So Torres pushes away from his desk and walks away down the hall; if McGee spares him a split-second, he'll likely presume a bathroom break, which is the excuse Torres will give him if need be.

Truthfully, Torres meanders. He winds through the hallways, both comforted and nauseated by the same ol' orange walls, until he finds a spot that's relatively quiet and just…props himself up. He releases a low, long, slow breath that would be a sigh if he weren't so exhausted from the last several days. Then he plucks his phone from his pocket and dials.

Yet again and forever unsuccessfully, he calls Bishop. (A disconnected number could one day be reconnected. …a guy can hope, right?)

Torres frowns. He expects as much. Still, he knows better, knows that he needs to set aside time to handle these emotions so that he can focus on his job. And…

He pauses to offer up a polite smile and nod to a passing agent who gives Torres a curious look, eyeing him standing by himself in the hall, cradling his phone to his chest like precious gems.

…and Torres knows that, despite him and Knight clearing the air, she only has part of the story.

He glances at the time on his phone and figures he has a couple minutes more before someone comes looking for or calling him. So he pockets his phone and replays in his mind's eye the scene from this morning with Knight.

Pushing her to take over Bishop's desk? A jerky move. Moving some of her things to Bishop's desk without asking? Torres winces now, knowing and hating what an ass he'd been. Hence, he'd been glad to discuss the matter with Knight a little bit ago while watching LeMere.

The only problem is that she, McGee—everyone has it wrong. They think Torres' insistence comes from him wanting to use the appearance of a new team member as an excuse or a crutch to get over Bishop and her sudden departure. In reality, Torres sees a glimpse of years ago:

A team in the making.

A hotshot, good agent who plays alone more often than not.

Knight comes from a team setting, he knows that, but her old team marched to a different beat than that of the Major Case Response Team, and her eagerness to help out now doesn't outshine the way she likes to do things on her own—or just do things her way. Torres looks at Knight and thinks of his younger self when he joined what was then Gibbs' team, and he can't help the comparison because they have a lot in common. Formerly impulsive spirits can spot impulsive spirits from miles away.

So it's not about replacing Bishop or making things normal around here. If he can convince Knight to take that desk, then—then—it'll be like a fresh start.

Torres runs his hands over his face, his eyes widening with clarity.

It makes sense. Helping someone so like him (or, so like his younger self) join their team is almost like Torres getting a partial do-over… He doesn't need to change everything—he stands by what he confided in Knight, about only changing the fact that he hadn't properly expressed his feelings to Bishop, because it's never crossed his mind that this pain might not exist if he'd never fallen for Ellie Bishop in the first place. But Torres isn't so self-centered that he doesn't have a wish for their new teammate and friend.

Once more, he grabs his phone. Lost in his thoughts, he missed two texts' chirps. One is from McGee:

-?!

Obviously wondering where Torres is. Knight's provides better info with a touch of kindness:

-Got some info. McG has everyone at screen. U good?

Torres briefly grins. He'll make sure she understands their chat from earlier doesn't bother him; if anything, it helped. And…yeah, Jess Knight's a bit of an acquired taste, but he can see this new team working together fine from now on. Although, Torres thinks as he closes their texts and pulls up his call history to dial just once more before this quick break ends, he sincerely hope Knight isn't so like him the way she's seemed so far, otherwise she's got grief, heartbreak, and yet more loss in her future.

"We're sorry. You have reached a number that has been disconnected…."

- ^-^3

OH, BOY. Before I dump the garbage bag that is my feels, I'mma say first: The original idea for this ficlet was "I get a bros vibe from Torres and Knight," and I wanted to do smthg with that, so here! XD I do think they have a lot of things in common, dating back to Knight's first eps at the end of s18 when she first shows her impulsive side that has even Torres going "now hold on a minute," because…that's literally early Torres. (*lol* I have a type, I know. X'D) Anyway! I like Knight, she's growing on me, and I liked seeing these two have a spat and then being good teammates/friends by talking it out. Hence reframing s19e2's Torres, so he's not coming from merely an Ellick standpoint (altho WHOA BABY s19 is srsly giving all us Ellick shippers the feels ;w;). Anyway, platonic stuff is impt and fun to write, so yeah! A few random things: Considering the abrupt, shocking ending to the episode, I struggled to figure out where to slot this fic in, oof… Also a bit tired lately, so I went analog and drafted this first in a ntbk! (Been way too long, even tho ntbks used to be my main thing for fic back in the day.) So hooray for my 1st analog NCIS fic. The last line of the fic comes verbatim from s19e1 when Torres tried calling Bishop… ;w; The title of the fic is a reference to Torres seeing is younger self in Knight. Lastly…raise your hand if you're part of my crowd and anytime you see the word "crutch," you start hearing the Matchbox Twenty song. ;P (I will always love Rob Thomas' vocals. TT-TT)

Thanks for reading, and please review! Check out my other NCIS fics if you liked this.

-mew-tsubaki :')