That afternoon, I give Shinsou his letter.
He glances at it, sort of looks at the words, and crumples it up before tossing it in the trash. I blink in surprise. He snorts.
"I don't really care," he says and starts stretching. "As long as your better now it's whatever. I just don't want you crying its unfair when I beat you."
I scowl.
"Seriously? You didn't win last time," I remind him as I start stretching beside him. He moves his arm across his body, and I do the same, clicking my tongue. "What makes you think you will today?"
"Mainly the fact that you don't train outside of weekends," he says, his expression smug.
"We have final exams," I defend. He switches to lunges and I do the same. "Not everyone is as smart as you! I study for hours." Then I grin. "Besides, if Sensei would let me use my quirk, it wouldn't even be a competition."
"That's true," he smirks. "You'd talk in like five seconds and I'd walk you and your tentacles off the mat, doll."
"Oh, like you did Midoriya?"
He scowls, I laugh, and we both start on sit-ups.
Sensei, already pulling out the mat, huffs at the both of us. I grin. When we finish, we join him, and, unlike before, I'm surprised to feel excited. Shinsou raises an eyebrow. I wiggle my eyebrows and giggle.
"If you two are done?" Sensei asks, voice flat and lips twitching. I flush and don't look at Shinsou. "You two can spar, ten rounds, the goal is to get the other to tap out. Questions?"
No.
I don't need an invitation to settle into my stance. He smirks, and when Sensei says go, I lunge forward with a strike. We spend nearly an hour trading blows and trying to pin the other down. We've gotten better at learning each other. And I smirk victoriously when I execute a particularly inspired jump that slams him face-first into the ground and ending our last match.
"Urg, geroff!"
"You haven't tapped," I wheeze. Then, grinning cheekily, I lightly tap his cheeks. I'd discovered he disliked it about three matches earlier and had relentlessly teased him with it to my advantage. He grunts and tries to get his hands under him. I knock them away and he growls.
"Tap," I repeat. He tries again, but I push his head down and dig my knuckles into his ribs.
"Fine!" he gasps.
I roll off him and onto the mat. Sticky with sweat and dirt and still somewhat out of breath, I just lay there for a moment and pant. Beside me, Shinsou does the same, his pale skin glistening and his purple hair dusty and disheveled. I turn, look at him, and laugh.
He scowls.
Sensei just sort of sighs at us.
I don't want the day to end.
.
.
.
That evening, after dinner, Sensei clears away the dishes and has me sit at the kitchen table with a pencil and paper. I wait patiently as he deliberates on a topic, both curious and nervous about what he will choose. Nobody's ever given me a writing assignment as punishment.
"Write one full page on why you deserve to be happy."
I stare, eyebrows furrowing, not sure I heard that right.
"W-What?"
He turns off the water in the sink and speaks a little louder.
"One page on why you deserve to be happy."
He raises an eyebrow and I still don't know what to do with that. He waits patiently, as I struggle to comprehend him.
"S-Sensei, are… are you sure?"
"Yes."
"B-But… why?"
"Because you're grounded," he says flatly. I flush and turn back to the paper. The pause lengthens until I actually pick up the pen and then the sink water turns on. I stare at the paper, and, slowly, write the title at the top.
I deserve to be happy because…
I have no idea.
About ten minutes in, I understand why this is punishment. I have absolutely no idea what to write. I glance between the paper and Sensei and frown when I notice his attention locked on the dishes. I turn back to my task and sigh.
"Use your words Hoki," he reminds me from the sink.
"I don't know what to write," I say. I glance back over; he still isn't looking my way.
"Then ask for help."
My eye twitches. He makes this sound so simple.
"Sensei, can you help me?"
He shuts off the water, dries his hands, and immediately comes to squat next to me. He's close enough I can smell him. Close enough I can feel the heat of his body. Close enough I could just lean over and touch him. I don't, but it's tempting.
He looks at my blank paper and smirks.
"Nothing?"
"No, sir."
"Do you think Hizashi deserves to be happy?"
"Yes, sir."
"Why?"
I give him an odd stare.
"Do you want me to write it or say it?"
"Whichever."
I put the pencil down.
"He… He's kind and friendly. And… he helps others even though he doesn't get anything out of it," I pause and pull at my fingers. "Is… is that okay?"
"I think so," Sensei says, and he scratches his chin. Something warm bubbles up in my chest and I hesitantly smile at the praise. "Do you think you're kind or friendly?"
"I… guess?"
"You guess," he deadpans. "Do you not know?"
I flush and look away.
"I wasn't kind Friday," I admit. Sensei nods.
"And the day before that? What about when you made cupcakes for Shinsou for his birthday? Or when you saved Midoriya from falling?"
I can see where he's going with this. I pick up the pencil.
I deserve to be happy because I'm kind to others.
It feels wrong to write it. I don't know why. It should, I don't think.
"Consider the others around you," Sensei says standing. He presses a hand against my shoulder, and I lean into the warmth of it. "If you think they deserve to be happy, consider why. Examine that reason and see if it applies to you."
"Yes, sir."
I work for another hour to fill up the page, asking for help twice more. When I finish it, I hand the full sheet to Sensei with a strange sense of warmth. He sits on the couch with a cup of coffee and reads through it silently. Hesitantly, I sit beside him, leaning against his arm. He says nothing, and when he finishes, he folds it and sticks it in the stack of papers at on the small table he'd brought out to keep them all in place.
"Did… Did I do okay?" I ask quietly as I pet the kitten now curled in my lap.
"It's acceptable," he says after a sip. "Your thinking is where I expected it would be."
"What do you mean?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows. He glances my way, expression bored, and I smile a little at the familiarity of it.
"It means Nemuri will be collecting you books for summer reading. We can discuss it further after your exams."
I nod but don't leave. Sensei doesn't make me, at least, not until bedtime.
.
.
.
The weekend ends quickly, too quickly. Monday arrives and I nervously clutch my bag as we make our way to school. I fill the silence with questions and Sensei lets me with his usual indifference. Do you think Yamada-sensei will be mad at me? No. Have you ever made him mad? Yes. Did he yell at you? Sometimes. Usually, I get a long series of texts. How come you don't yell at me? I don't need to.
"Sensei," I ask as the dark-haired man enters our homeroom and turns on the lights. "Will Yamada-sensei be here this early?"
"Yes," Eraserhead grunts. He looks at me for a moment before grabbing a small stack of papers and leaving. I'm fairly sure they're our exams for today, he'd quizzed me over the material again Sunday and spent a good thirty minutes having to re-explain the topic of vigilantes. He'd been less than pleased.
Grabbing the apology letter, I take a deep sigh and make my way to the English classroom. I'm unsurprised to see the light on and hear a steady thrum of music.
Knocking, I slide open the door.
Present Mic looks over, legs kicked up on his desk, and a stack of papers in his lap. I don't miss the phone in his hand or the way he swipes through the apps like he always does. He sees me and raises an eyebrow, his lips twisting into a wide grin.
"Good morning Rin-chan. What brings you down to this side of the building?"
I flush and shuffle closer, shame and fear and embarrassment rising. I dip into a low bow and take a deep breath.
"I… I'm sorry Sensei."
"Oh? For what?" he asks. I can hear him shuffling as he puts the papers back on his desk and turns in his chair.
"I was rude and disrespectful Friday. I had no right to speak to you that way. I apologize."
I don't rise immediately. There's a noise and dark, leather-clad legs appear. A hand taps on my shoulder and I glance upwards. The blonde smirks down and shakes his head almost fondly.
"How about that hug now?"
Flushing, I rise. The taller man laughs and wraps me in his arms, pulling me tightly to his chest. I sigh, feeling muscles I hadn't realized were tight, suddenly relax. I press my face under his directional speaker and breathe the familiar scent of his cologne.
After a moment, he pulls away and pats my head fondly.
"Really, Rin-chan, I really wasn't angry so much as worried," he says looking down. "Though I may have a new appreciation for the amount of sass you keep locked away."
I blush and he winks.
"S-Sensei," I squeak pulling away.
"What? It's not every day someone has the guts to call me nosy. Or better yet, tell me 'tough shit.'" He snorts and I feel my face redden. "Considering how sweet and mild-mannered you usually are, it makes me wonder where that came from."
I tug at my fingers nervously.
"Y-Yu…" I break off, still not ready to say her name. "My old guardian used to say it, the curse I mean," I admit.
"Somehow, that doesn't surprise me," the blonde says dryly. "I imagine she wouldn't have taken that lip well either considering how nervous you're acting."
I swallow.
"She would have slapped me," I say honestly. Sensei looks unamused.
"Lovely."
I hand him the apology note. He glances at it briefly before dropping it on his desk. Like Aizawa-sensei and even Shinsou, he makes no move to continue fussing or even to lecture. I wait, nervously, for him to change his mind, for him to cuss or yell, but he just sits back down in his rolling chair and gives me an odd look.
"You good kid?"
"You're… you're really not going to yell?"
Yamada-sensei frowns and then his eyes soften.
"Nope, I'm good. You okay?"
I smile hesitantly.
"Yeah."
Then, without warning, I lean forward and hug Yamada-sensei about the neck. His speaker gets in the way, but I don't care. He laughs and pats my arm.
"Alright, alright! Get out of here, don't you have finals to study for?"
.
.
.
Mineta and Iida's apologies are less difficult in comparison to the others. I bow deeply when Iida arrives, offering him the letter that he reads seriously before neatly packing it in his bag.
"You are forgiven," he says instantly. I have to leave him quickly, too flustered by the rather direct way he stares at me.
When Mineta arrives in the half-full classroom, I suck up my courage and rise. He looks at me oddly when he sits down, and I hesitate for a moment awkwardly in front of him before bowing deeply.
"Mineta-kun," I say quietly, uncomfortably aware that people are watching. "I apologize for being unkind Friday."
"Uh- H-H-Hoki-chan, what are you doing?"
When I look up, I'm surprised to see his face reddening.
"Apologizing," I answer blinking. He gapes and I straighten. He splutters and twitches.
Is he okay?
"Are you okay?" I ask, hand reaching out before I realize that's probably not appropriate. I put it back at my side.
"W-Why- to me? I don't- But people don't-"
I have absolutely no idea what he's trying to tell me. I push my braid back behind my shoulder and frown, waiting to see if he just needs more time. I squat, maybe he needs space. Sometimes that helps, right? Or maybe I should ask again?
When he's still gaping after several more seconds, I give up on waiting. I consider what Yamada or Aizawa-sensei would do. After a moment's debate, I go with my guardian's approach.
"Are you hurt?" I ask, trying to sound flat.
"N-No!" he squeaks looking at me like I'm crazy. I tilt my head to the side.
"Ah, are you… upset?"
"What? No, I just… Nobody ever apologizes to me!" I frown at that. "I just, I wasn't expecting you to bow, and—all you said was shut up."
I look down and pull at my fingers, shame rising again at my own behavior.
What you did today was wrong. I'm not upset that you were angry, I'm upset that you took it out on others. Hurting others is wrong and you know that better than most.
"I don't like to hurt people," I tell him after a moment. "Even if what I said was just 'shut up' it wasn't kind, and that isn't okay. You deserve to be treated kindly. I'm sorry Mineta-kun. I was upset, but I'll do better to control my emotions."
He frowns at me.
"Why were you upset?" he asks, and I return to my seat.
"My guardian threatened to pull me from the hero program," I admit timidly. Mineta gasps and I can feel Todoroki's eyes fall on me.
"What? Why? You're freaking amazing! Your quirk is super strong!"
I blush a little at his praise and rub my neck.
"T-Thank you," I mumble, ignoring the rest of the question.
I'm not abused.
I swallow down that thought and the strange, nasty mix of emotions related to it. Not now.
"Hey, wait, did you say guardian?" he asks after a second. His eyes widen and he looks at me oddly. "Not your parents?"
I blush when several of my classmates turn to glance our way.
"I… I was adopted," I admit shyly.
"Was it recent?" Midoriya asks curiously, his face intense as he turns in his desk. I give him an odd look and nod. His face breaks out in a huge grin, it wrinkles his freckles and makes him look younger. "I knew it! It was after the internships, right?"
Several more faces turn our way.
"Y-Yeah," I shrink into my chair.
"Oh, the bracelet!" Mineta says, catching my attention again. "It really isn't from baggy eyes!"
My eye twitches and I scowl at him. He grins cheekily back.
"Shinsou," I correct him before shaking my head. "It was a gift. Can… can we talk about something else? Wh-What did you do this weekend?"
Mineta grins in excitement and launches into an elaborate tale that lasts until Sensei arrives. I smile as he does.
.
.
.
Finals are hard.
The written tests take place each day, last several hours, and throw the entire day off-schedule. It's exhausting, sitting in desks trying to recall every detail. I've never worried about them before, but with Sensei watching, it feels now somehow more important. Somehow more necessary to do better.
Still, I pass.
I can tell the way Yamada-sensei smiles mischievously in the hall and the way Midnight-sensei winks when no one's looking. Nobody notices, except maybe Midoriya, but he always seems to notice everything. I just shrug my shoulders and focus instead on not throwing up or having a panic attack in the hall.
I'm going to be stronger.
I want to protect you and Yamada-sensei and Shinsou-kun.
The practical test on Friday is the most stressful of all though.
The rumor was we'd be facing robots. Red had mentioned it at least five or six times and I'd had enough other things to worry about (like math!) that ignoring the practical section seemed to make sense at the time. Robots were simple. Ripping through them would be easy enough.
But there was no way that was happening. Not when we're separated into pairs and shipped off in buses to different, remote areas. I probably should have expected this. Destroying robots was easy.
Too easy.
Sensei never liked easy.
"It's likely we'll face a real opponent," says the bird. Tokoyami.
I grimace.
Out of everyone they could have paired me with, why him?
You can stop pretending.
They think we have similar quirks. They're not.
I don't know what your shadows are made of, but they smell like death. And today, you smelled like a predator.
My stomach rolls as the two of us sit across from each other in the back of a bus, traffic passing out the window in muted blurs. When I grunt, he crosses his human arms and cocks his feathered head to the side. The light from the bus reflects against the feathers.
"Considering the selection of pairs, this is likely not a random arrangement. We should work together in order to do our best," he says.
"Yeah," I mutter, sliding my hands into the pocket of my vest.
This is going to be awful.
They think we have similar quirks. They're not.
"Perhaps it would be best if we shared our skills. As teammates, we will need to be able to rely on each other and develop a plan. I am not familiar with you enough to know much beyond what you show the class."
What you show.
You can stop pretending.
I cringe and pull at my fingers. After a moment of silence, I gather my courage and start.
"My quirk is emotional manifestation." He raises an eyebrow. At least, I think he does, it's hard to tell with the feathers. "It has two forms: shadows and flames."
The bird's eyes narrow and he cocks his head.
"Which emotions are those?"
"Fear and anger," I tell him purposefully not looking his way. "The- The shadows are fear, I can shape them to anything I want, but it takes concentration. M-Most of the time I have to choose between controlling them or paying attention to my opponent, otherwise, they hurt people. And… And the flames just happen."
"Hmm," he says, and I glance his way nervously. He looks off into space in contemplation. "Dark Shadow is similar in some respects. He is my partner in everything, an extension of my inner self, and requires a certain, constant amount of control. However, he's also able to function independently, communicate, and reason. You mentioned the darker emotions, what about the positive ones?"
I frown at him oddly.
He meets my gaze straightforward. I look away flushed.
"I don't know. I've… I don't know."
"Strange," he says and lets it go. "We should have a plan going in. This will likely be a battle-styled exam, so we will probably need to either restrain someone or retrieve a person or item. If the later, we should focus on speed rather than attacks."
Slowly, I nod.
I hadn't expected that. He smirks.
"Whoever we fight, without knowing their quirk and current skills, taking them on headfirst would be foolish in any situation. Based on your performance at the festival, I'd say we're both mid-ranged fighters. Whoever we're up against is going to test either our skills or our weaknesses, we should be prepared for both."
I nod, impressed at his logical reasoning. After a moment, I hesitantly offer a suggestion. He listens silently before giving feedback. We spend the rest of the bus ride talking, contemplating different strategies and discussing creative ways to combine our shadows to remove ourselves from different situations. By the time we arrive, I feel my shoulders relax and my posture loosen.
If Tokoyami notices, he says nothing.
.
.
.
"I will be your examiner," Ectoplasm says in the middle of a large, circular building. It looks a little like a theater, or maybe a coliseum. Having never been to either, I can only guess based on the images I'd seen in books. "You two will work together to either cuff me or escape through the exit on the other side of the building. You have one hour to complete this task in order to pass. If you do not, you will fail immediately."
He hands me the cuffs and I stuff them quickly in my vest pocket. I grimace and beside me I see Tokoyami straighten.
"Do you have any questions?"
"Sir, do you really expect two first-year students to be able to take on a pro?" Tokoyami asks.
"No," Ectoplasm responds immediately. I shrink. That's positive. "Normally you would not, but I'm wearing inhibitors to give you an advantage and sometimes heroes are faced with extraordinary odds. I intend to see if you can overcome them."
"I'm going to make you pay, hero," he whispers. His hand moves, slipping beneath my head to cradle my skull, twisting my head to look at him. "I'm going to make you watch as I destroy everything you've ever loved."
My teeth clench and I settle into my stance, scratching my arms to drag out my shadows.
I'm going to be stronger.
Tokoyami glances at me in surprise before Dark Shadow rises out in front of him. The black shadow of a bird looks less than pleased.
"She stinks like death," the shadow snaps.
"Dark Shadow, now is not the time."
Ectoplasm multiplies.
"Very well, we will begin."
The hero flashes forward and I lash out with my tentacles, dragging them through him and ripping him into smoke.
"Up," Tokoyami grunts. I nod and send tentacles towards him and sling him upwards. Dark shadow snaps at the shadows and I can tell from the bird boy's face that he's needing to exert more control than normal. I don't have time to ponder it, three more ectoplasms are surrounding me. One kicks my back and it's only the instincts from my practices with Shinsou that has me diverting my roll to avoid being stomped.
I choke, smoke in my throat, blood in my mouth.
I rake my hands in the space ahead of me, my shadows following suit, and dissolve all three.
My breath comes in gasps and my back throbs from the hit. It's a familiar feeling, it's going to bruise.
"Hoki, come on!"
I shoot tentacles from my arm and launch myself upwards. Ectoplasm appears above me in a cloud of smoke, and I brace for the kick I see coming.
But Dark shadow pushes him away and Tokoyami reaches out and pulls me to the floor by my vest.
Asp rises, his figure sharp and looming under the steady fall of rain. Hand still wrapped in my vest; he drags me to my feet.
My body shakes. His eyes narrow.
"L-L-Let g-g-go," I whimper. He does, instantly releasing me. I back against the wall and breathe.
"You're unwell," the bird says eyes narrow.
"P-P-Panic a-a-attack," I manage.
"Your enemies will not give you time to rest," Ectoplasm chides us. Three more of him appear and I have no choice but to throw myself from the wall and duck under his swings. The shadows I call are less stable, constantly shifting and twisting forms. Tokoyami battles this set of clones. "If you can't control your emotions, you have no place on the battlefield."
Promise me Hellspawn, promise me you'll get strong. Promise me you won't let him take you too.
His face, dark and masked, looks too much like Asp. I focus on his teeth, on his voice.
Tokoyami defeats three more before he grabs my arm and drags me down a hall.
"We need to get to the exit," he says sharply. His cloak billows and I scramble to keep up. "You couldn't have mentioned the panic attacks before now?"
"I haven't had one all week," I say, and I try to control my breath and run.
"What triggered it?" he says before stopping and letting me go. Four more Ectoplasms in front of us, three more appearing behind.
Whoever we're up against is going to test either our skills or our weaknesses, we should be prepared for both.
We're both mid-range fighters. They're testing our weaknesses.
What's mine?
I don't learn names.
"Tokoyami," I shout clearly. He glances my way, and I grit my teeth. "Duck."
He does, moving without question. I twist sideways and thrust out both arms. The shadows that erupt are black as night, thick as tree trunks, and as vicious as snakes. If I could see either end, I'm sure they'd have fangs and fiery tongues.
Tokoyami curses and I release the power at once.
Dark shadow screams and climbs across the boy's feathered head, talons extending and piercing the boy's uniform. Tokoyami's eyes roll back as he fights for control. I don't really think. I grab his arm and the dark bird shrieks, raking its claws down my arm.
I scream, my vision blackening at the edges, but don't let go.
"Shit," the boy snarls and he thrashes behind me as I pull. The wound throbs, my back aches, and I can feel a headache beginning to pound somewhere behind my eyes, but I don't let go. I won't let go. "Hoki, I can't- I- ugh!"
I'll be stronger.
I promise!
"Focus on Dark Shadow," I tell him through gritted teeth. Blood drips down my arm, slipping over my skin like rainwater, but warm. I can feel his hand in mine, slippery from the redness. But the pain drives me, it infuriates me. I can feel the fire rise.
I'll be stronger.
I want to protect you and Yamada-sensei and Shinsou-kun.
I won't lose.
I clear the path through four more Ectoplasm clones with a blast of black flames. The walls blacken, the floor melts, and the smell of smoke and death and rage fills my lungs.
When we exit to another, large room, I release the Tokoyami and immediately separate to give us space. He takes several steadying breaths and I stumble towards a wall. I'm thankful for the respite, thankful Ectoplasm lets us. He stands as a sentinel below us, back to the colorful, well-lit exit with arms hung simply at his side and leaning forward.
"Hurting your comrades, panicking, and losing control during a fight. Do the two of you even want to be heroes?"
I grimace, grab the bandage wrapped around my calves and unwind them with one hand as the hero speaks. His eyes move between us. I stuff one end in my mouth and do my best to quickly wrap them around my arm. The end result is too tight and bloody. The cuts too deep and thick. I can hardly breathe as I tie the end, my arm limp at my side.
"I won't go easy on you just because you're students. I lost these legs in the line of duty. I'll fail you both if you can't overcome this."
Then, taking a deep breath, Ectoplasm opens his mouth and releases a massive volume of smoke. From it, a monstrous head rises up from the center of the floor. I can only stare in horror as it rises. Across the room, Tokoyami shouts a warning and I scream as darkness and teeth and death consumes me. The head lunges, the world disappears.
I can't breathe.
I thrash in restraints I can't see, something strong and cold melting over my body.
"Hoki!"
I scream as the head retracts; my body left trapped in the wall.
"Hoki!"
I can't.
He knocks my head against the brick wall. Shadows sweep across my vision, pain shoots through my skull and neck, nausea rises instantly. He pulls me back and blood drips from the wall.
No, no, no!
"Damn it, Hoki!"
I break the cement in a swarm of shadows, falling to my knees. The head returns and I try to look past it, try to see the here and now, but all I can see is that mask—Asp standing over me, leering. I open my mouth and instead of a scream, I release shadows. Snakes, tentacles, and hands, all dark as night and tasting of death.
I choke on them.
They pour out, faster and faster than I can control. They rise and spread, and wrap around the giant head, choking it, gagging it, squeezing-
I can't breathe.
"Hoki!" shouts Tokoyami again. I somehow manage to stop the flow from my mouth. It's like trying to stop water as it fills your lungs. I cough and splutter and heave. "The door! Part of us just has to get out the door!"
I don't know what he's talking about. I can't think past the terror in my limbs.
"Hoki!"
"What?" I snarl, throat raw and body aching.
"Stop panicking!" he snaps.
I suck in another breath and then another. Tokoyami, now fully in control of Dark Shadow, moves around from the balcony of other side of the room, Dark shadow battling to get out the doorway below us with no real success.
"Okay," I manage after a moment. "Okay!"
"We need to get through the door," he shouts. "Can you cover me long enough to escape? Can you do it?"
Why is he saying this all out loud? I try to focus. His face intense.
"If by some chance, we're separated and need to share information publicly, we should plan now to do the opposite of whatever the other says," Tokoyami suggests.
I frown.
"Oh… Okay, I'll- I'll try."
"Y-Yeah," I shout a moment later. I grimace and hold my arm and rise.
Ectoplasm looks between us. And I focus to control my powers again. What's left of the snakes still keeping the giant head busy disappear, the shadows stretching between us lifting like fog. Tentacles writhe on my arms instead, twisting and spiraling and coiling, thick and black and cold. I can't lift my left arm, my head spins dizzily with blood loss, and my chest and back ache from bruises.
The head attacks again, this time taking on Tokoyami. I trust him to move away and dive forward, concentrating on my back.
The back of my shirt rips, black leathery wings split and break free from the fabric. I glide faster and faster towards my math teacher now blocking my way. He doesn't move, face turned to stare.
Ectoplasm grins, twists, and I know what's coming next is going to hurt.
I curl the wings tighter around my body, unable to create tentacles and wings at the same time, and suddenly flare them at the last minute. I brace for it, twisting then to protect my face and arm from the brunt of the attack.
The wooden peg-leg that slams into my stomach knocks the breath from my lungs and I gag on vomit in my throat.
But the manacles in my hand slide onto the leg all same.
Wind rushes around my face and my shadows disperse.
.
I groan and open my eyes, not really sure when I closed them.
"Good work you two," Ectoplasm says. I make no move to get up, body aching. "You both pass. Tokoyami-kun, do you need any assistance getting down?"
"Yes sir," the bird says. I can't see him, but his voice sounds strangled. There's a rustle, the sound of falling debris. I focus instead on the sound of my own breath rattling in my lungs and on settling my stomach. My throat burns with acid, my mouth slick with the taste of it.
Maybe its seconds, maybe it's minutes, I lose track of time. I just sort of sigh when Ectoplasm's mask and teeth fill my vision and try not to wince, knowing it's time to stand.
"Hoki-chan, I know I didn't kick you hard enough to break anything. Are you otherwise hurt?"
I stare up at my math teacher and offer a strangled smile.
"M-My arm sir," I say still not moving. "It's o-okay, I-I'm just dizzy."
"Blood loss?" he asks kneeling down. Despite having no legs, he maneuvers well. In seconds he's undone my too tight bandages and his eyes narrow. "Hmm, that does look deep. You'll need to see Recovery girl."
His mask looks away and I catch the sight of dusty black feathers.
"Tokoyami-kun, go grab the first aid kit it's by the doorway."
I grimace from my place on the ground. As soon as the boy walks away, Ectoplasm's voice lowers.
"I saw the panic attacks. You did well recovering both times. However, next time, you would do better to warn your teammate ahead of time. As you saw today, battles are not the time to discover your partner's triggers."
I sigh wearily.
"Yes, sir."
"Tokoyami, do you know how to properly dress a wound?" Ectoplasm asks.
"In theory, yes, sir."
Ectoplasm stands and moves over.
"Excellent, we can spend the next few minutes putting it into practice. Grab some gloves and the alcohol and you can begin sterilizing. I will observe."
I close my eyes and breathe through my nose, trying not to think. When the sharp scent of alcohol hits my nose, I wince.
"I apologize, Hoki-san," Tokoyami says and I can feel his human fingers covered in latex pressing against my arm. It's strange, his touch is more hesitant than I expected despite his obvious calm. "I knew Dark Shadow had a dislike for your shadows, but I was unprepared for it to affect him quite so strongly. I should not have lost control."
I frown.
"Where- Where is he?" I ask.
"Back in my body," he says. I open my eyes and frown at the narrowed concentration of his bird-like gaze. "You still reek of death and it would be unwise to relinquish any control."
"Ah," I whisper. "Thank you."
"For what?" he asks dropping the alcohol wipe to the side and moving to a roll of bandages. Ectoplasm, still standing nearby, nods in approval.
"Excellent work Tokoyami-kun, I've already summoned the bus and Recovery girl is prepared for you Hoki-chan. Make sure you don't wrap that so tight it cuts off circulation."
"Of course, sir."
"Hoki-san?"
I blink and realize I was nodding off. The bird smirks and I blink tiredly back, trying to ignore the throbbing all over. My body aches and the cold chill of the floor does nothing to help.
"Did you finish?" I ask. He nods and leans forward helping to pull me to my feet. I wince and sway. Ectoplasm grips my shoulders. I examine the neat bandages, nauseously. When we board the bus, I slump in the seat and hold my stomach and pass out.
.
.
.
"Well, this one's going to scar," Recovery girl says with a sigh when I wake from my nap as she hands me a glass of water. I drain it quickly and pour myself some more. She'd healed Tokoyami as well, but he'd left early on. Midoriya and Bakugou had been there then as well. "I don't know what possessed you to grab someone when they were losing control but let this be a lesson to you not do it again."
I drain a third glass and sigh.
"Yes, ma'am."
She shakes her head and tuts.
"You did well today child, that guardian of yours will be pleased." I feel my chest warm at the thought of that. The old lady smiles and pats my leg, clearly noticing. "If you're not tired, you can head back to class. I imagine you'll want to see your classmates before you all leave for the break?"
I nod and she sends me away.
Entering 1A, I'm unsurprised to find the class already there. I smile brightly at Tokoyami who gives me a curious once over before heading to my seat. Midoriya, who sits directly in front of Mineta, turns and grins as I pass.
I pause.
"Ah…"
"I got to watch your exam," the green-haired boy says smiling. "You're so amazing Hoki-chan!"
"Ah, me?" I point to myself in surprise and blink. "But, ah… why?"
Midoriya grins and I can't help but notice that his eyes almost seem to light up in his excitement.
"Are you serious? Your quirk is so versatile! The way you make shadows and flames is so neat, it's related to your emotions, right? You always get so much more powerful when people are in danger. And the way you broke through the cement wall when Ectoplasm stuck you there! That was so cool! Like in the USJ when you attacked the villain. The shadows are fear-based, right? I mean, it'd make sense, I was terrified when that Nomu had Aizawa-sensei, so I figured it was the same…"
He keeps going and I can't help but watch as the words keep tumbling out of his mouth at a ridiculous rate, lowering in volume until I have no idea what he's talking about.
"Ah…"
Mineta laughs, reaches forward, and grabs Midoriya by the shoulders.
"Hey! Hey! Back to Earth Midoriya!"
I giggle as the green-haired boy turns pink.
"Thank you," I say with a short bow, surprisingly amused by the reaction. It's weird not to be the one tongue-tied. "How did you do?"
"I passed!" Green says excitedly pumping his arm in the air. I look towards Mineta and he grins too.
"We all passed, except Kaminari, Sato, Kirishima, and Ashido," Mineta says proudly. I only remember one of those names, but I can guess based on their sullen faces.
"Are you feeling better?" Tokoyami asks, making his way over towards us.
"Much, thank you," I admit somewhat embarrassed. Tokoyami nods, gives me an almost contemplative look, before walking away to speak with Frog.
"Hey, Hoki-chan, you wanna trade phone numbers?" Mineta asks cheekily. "I could finally take you on that date I promised!"
"Ah, I… sure?" I say. Mineta blinks, Kaminari's mouth drops open, and Red swivels in his seat. I take my seat and pull out my phone. Mineta takes one look at it and laughs, loudly.
"Hoki-chan! Really? That thing's ancient! Awe man, you have minutes. Who does that any more?"
I pout and copy down my number on a piece of paper. By the time Mineta's finished putting it in, Red's already snapped a picture, Pink's laid herself across my desk to type in the number, and even Midoriya's craning his head to hurriedly type.
I shake my head and smile.
Maybe I'm still dreaming in the nurse's office?
If so, I almost hope I don't wake up.
.
.
.
Sensei dismisses the class after handing out pamphlets, talking about a summer camp, and explaining something I really don't have the focus to listen to. I'm not sure why, but as the end of class creeps closer, it's like my body seems to fill. I bounce my legs, tap my pencil, and smile brightly when Todoroki glances over strangely. After spending so many weeks stressing, just the knowledge that we're done feels like removing a heavy weight.
I feel lighter than air. I feel like dancing in place. I feel like I could burst with brightness.
Have I ever felt this good?
If so I don't remember when.
As the students all file out, I ignore the curious glances, I can't help but stand as well. I sharpen all of my pencils, line up all the desks, and spin a few times as I skip back to my space.
Sensei glowers.
It does nothing to change my mood.
"Can I have a hug?" I ask him after sitting back down and realizing I really don't want to.
"No," he says flatly. I pout, lean forward, and swing my legs. His eye twitches and I make my feet move a little faster.
"Do you think Yamada-sensei could come over today?"
"Ask him yourself."
"Okay!"
I noisily pull out my phone, rattling all the contents of my bag as I drag it out again, and text Yamada-Sensei.
Can you come over today after school? And can you bring real food?
Sensei's phone buzzes. He pulls it out before giving me a dark look.
"Vegetables are real food, child."
"Is that a yes?" I ask excitedly. I get up from the seat, unable to stay contained in it, and walk to the front of the classroom. I lean on his desk and kick my feet up off the floor. "Can he? Sensei, I passed!"
"Yes and I know." I grin when I catch his almost fond expression. It quickly dissolves into a bored scowl. I wonder if I'd get in trouble for hugging him anyways. He raises an eyebrow as if reading my mind and I grin even wider. "You're not going to sit down, are you?"
"I'm too happy," I admit leaning on his desk and kicking up my feet again. His eye twitches and I stop. "Can we go home now?"
He sighs and doesn't answer. When he stands and gathers his things, I squeak in excitement and hurry back to pack my own. I shove my notebook and pencils in, zip it up, and shoulder my bag all before he finishes stacking his paperwork. He sighs again and I twirl and dance by the door.
Walking home, I match strides with Sensei.
He ignores me like usual and I wonder what it would take to make him crack. Grinning mischievously, I undo my braid, moussing my hair and pull a few strands between my eyes. He looks unamused. I try to scowl at him, but it doesn't work at all when I giggle.
"Fix your hair."
I laugh and run my hands through it, leaving it unbraided and wild. It blows wildly in the wind and I tug at the sleeve of his shirt.
"What?"
"I passed," I remind him, the giddy feeling growing in my chest. I feel so light I could float away, like I could dance all the way home, like I could fly.
"Yes, so you've said."
By the time we get home, he points to the kitten, and I all to happily flop on the floor. Miska talks noisily as I tease her into chasing some toys. By the time Yamada-sensei finally knocks a loud drumbeat on the door, the strange joy coursing through my chest has hardly diminished at all and I've had time to at least change into shorts and a shirt. I grin and sit up from the living room, watching as the dark-haired man huffs and opens the door.
Yamada-sensei, still dressed in his hero outfit, walks in with carryout.
I squeak excitedly, scrambling to my feet.
Yamada-sensei looks over concerned.
"She's been like this all afternoon," Eraserhead says flatly.
I skip over and help take the food. Placing it on the table before grinning widely at the tall blonde.
"Sensei! I passed!"
He blinks, as if he's not really sure what he's seeing, and then grins just as widely back. He opens his arms and I throw myself at his neck. He catches me effortlessly, picks me up, and swings me around. I squeal and clutch his jacket, feet dangling off the ground.
"Sensei!" I whine.
"I know! You did so great!" the blonde laughs. He pauses before putting me down, his face morphing into surprise. "Uh… Shouta…"
"You two are too loud," Aizawa-sensei grumbles. He turns to glower and pauses as well. My smile falters as I wonder what's wrong. "You're glowing."
I look down and jump when I notice the white glow now enveloping my skin. Something on my back itches and my shirt pulls taut against my chest and neck. I choke as it pulls tighter. Without really thinking, I tear away my shirt trying to release the pressure.
"What are you-"
"Hoki!"
Both Yamada and Aizawa-sensei choke as I'm left shirtless in my sports bra, finally able to breathe.
I turn my head to try and find the source. My mouth drops, and then I grin. White, glowing butterfly wings flap against my skin sprouting from the space just under my bra—not even two feet tall. They look more like stained glass than anything real. I giggle and they morph, twisting just like my shadows do and spreading into brilliant white bird wings about the same size. I concentrate, focusing like I would for the tentacles and they flutter! I squeak and do it again, stretching them out. Fully extended, they barely reach my elbow. I look up in excitement only to stop as Yamada-sensei stares red-faced at my head.
"S-Sensei?"
A hand presses on my bare shoulder. Calloused and warm, I turn, my wings shifting again—a tail!
"Hoki, put your shirt back on," Aizawa says. He scowls down at me looking more annoyed than I'd expected.
"But the wings make it too tight, I can't breathe," I whine, bending forward and retrieving the shirt from where I'd dropped it. Sensei's eye twitches before burning red. His hair floats, the glow disappears, and I tug the shirt back over my head with a pout.
"Hoki, don't take off your clothes in front of other people," Sensei grinds out.
"Why?" I ask frowning. "I have on a bra."
"Rin-chan!"
I grin at the blonde and squeak when my shirt suddenly tightens against my throat again. This time, when I go to grab it, Yamada-sensei seizes my hands noisily.
"Rin!"
"Sensei, I can't-"
Aizawa pulls a knife from somewhere and the sound of fabric ripping fills the room. A cool blast of air hits my back. Sensei does something and the tight pressure against my throat stops. The wings are back, this time looking more like a dragonfly. Semi-transparent and glowing. I squeal excitedly and back away, Yamada-sensei releasing my arms. I grin and wonder if I can fly. I jump, wings fluttering quickly. I can't, but I don't fall quite as fast.
My guardian rubs the bridge of his nose and sighs.
"Let's just eat."
A/N: I nearly split this chapter in half, but I've already pushed it back twice and I REALLY wanted to get to this end. :) Anyways, thank you all for your kind words!