I wake up early, and for once, Sensei is up as well. He pulls out his familiar bowl for coffee and slumps in his chair, looking half-dead in his rumpled uniform. I snicker and make us an egg, wondering if he slept in it.

"How many of those do you have?" I ask him curiously.

He stares irritably over his coffee.

"What?"

"Uniforms," I reply grinning. I poke his shoulder and his eyes narrow. "Do you have a whole closet full of them? Or do you just wear that one all the time? How many capture weapons do you have? Do you wash it, your capture weapon I mean? I've never seen you wash it… What if it gets dirty? And what do you keep in all your pockets? Do you have-"

He cuts me off with a groan.

I'm too excited to be offended.

I laugh and eat several mouthfuls before leaning forward on my palm and smiling at Sensei. He looks somehow both amused and disturbed. It's a weird expression, I wish I had my camera…

"Do you think Aunt Nemuri will remember to feed Miska?" I ask suddenly.

"Yes," he says flatly.

"How?" I demand. Sensei's eye twitches. "What if she forgets? You don't think she will, do you?"

"She won't forget."

I pout at his rather unenthusiastic answers and finish off my breakfast. Rising, I rinse and clean my plate, before tugging at my school uniform in anticipation. I return to Sensei and wait for him to lower the now half-empty bowl before risking a hug.

He grunts.

"I suggest you get this out now," he says lowly. "You're going to need to contain yourself in public."

I grin.

"I can get all of it out?" I ask mischievously.

"Isn't that-"

He cuts off as I kiss his face like Midnight did mine, lots of little ones spread all over his cheek and forehead. He growls, face turning a blistering red, and slips out of my grasp to stand. He glowers by his chair looking kind of like a tomato.

"What do you think you're doing?" he snaps.

He doesn't even look mad so much as overwhelmed.

I try to offer an innocent smile. It's completely ruined by my laughs.

"B-But you said-"

"Go get your things," he interrupts, scowling. His eyes narrow. "We're done. Do not do that again."

I giggle and grab my things, glowing.

.

.

.

The walk to school is much more interesting than normal. I skip beside Sensei, tugging on his sleeve and talking excitedly. I bounce on my toes at intersections, and giggle continuously as we walk. I nearly buzz with excitement, much to his exasperation.

I think he's kind of happy when we arrive, if only to get away and have some silence.

I wilt at the empty parking lot. Two large buses sit parked near the UA entrance, but that's it. No people, no classmates, no… anyone.

The disappointment feels like a physical weight.

"Sensei, where is everyone?"

He blinks for a moment before smirking over his to-go cup.

"They all got lost. It looks like you're the only one going."

I scowl at him and cross my arms.

I hope your coffee goes cold.

"You're so rude," I huff, puffing out my cheeks. "I'm going to play on my phone."

"You do that," he deadpans, and I know it's payback for those kisses. I blush and sprawl out on the sidewalk, thankful Sensei suggested I wear shorts and a tank top under my uniform. On my stomach, I kick my legs back and forth playing Shinsou's matching game again.

It's boring.

I switch to the messenger app and send Shinsou a selfie, sticking out my tongue and wrinkling my nose. He probably won't respond. He rarely wakes up before noon. But then, he rarely goes to bed at night either. One time I texted him when I woke up only to find him still awake!

"Sensei, if Shinsou doesn't have a bedtime, I don't think I should," I say putting down the phone.

My guardian snorts.

"Unfortunately for you, I don't care."

I glower at him. he doesn't even look up.

I sigh.

"When are they coming? Where is everyone? How come nobody's here yet? Are they ever-"

"Rin," he groans, putting down the clipboard for a moment to shoot me an exasperated stare. "We're early. The time said to be here in an hour. I'm checking to make sure we have all of our equipment, safety protocols, and gas. If you're bored, I can find you-"

"No!" I interrupt, reddening. "I'm good! I'll stop!"

He clicks his tongue and returns to his work. I roll onto my back and stare up at the early morning sky. Clouds trail across the blue vastness in fluffy white forms and I try to guess their shapes. I come up with little stories for each, a rabbit on the run from a fuzzy toucan, a pot of soup that transforms into a donkey. I nearly groan in disgust.

This is so boring.

I flop onto my stomach and stare at the sidewalk. A bug crawls by. Yamada-sensei would hate it.

I sit up and stretch.

I bounce rocks on the parking lot asphalt. Sensei tells me to stop.

I sigh, long and loud.

"Rin," Sensei growls.

"Eraser," interrupts another voice. I jerk up, turn and…

I slouch back forward, cringing slightly when I recognize the thick frame, red uniform, and silver-gray hair. Vlad King, Class 1B's homeroom teacher. He's huge with large bulging muscles and a square jaw.

"Vlad," Sensei says nodding.

"Where's your girl?" he asks, and I blush when his crimson eyes fall to me. He offers a wave and a grin. "Ah! Hello Rin-chan. Are you enjoying the dollhouse?"

I feel all my words dry up as I quickly pick myself off the ground, smoothing out my skirt.

He's so big.

Hero.

"Y-Y-Yes, sir," I mumble, stepping into Sensei's side. "Th-Thank you."

The large man laughs, his voice loud and cheerful and booming. I flush and wish I could hide behind Sensei as strange feelings itch inside my chest. I want to run. I bite my lip and offer a stiff, polite bow instead. Sensei gives me a knowing look as he steps forward, to hand over the clipboard. I sigh in relief as they both wander off discussing something boring.

I return the curb and don't lay down.

I don't have to wait long.

Iida is the next to arrive, walking in with Ponytail, and Kirishima. I stand, excitedly and feel a strange nervousness wiggle through my chest at the same time.

What if they forgot you… What if they don't want to be your friend… What if…

"Hey! Rin-chan! You're here!"

I blush as my skin brightens and Kirishima drops off his baggage in the back of the bus before rushing over. Behind him, Ponytail and Iida stare.

"Hi!" I squeak, unable to contain my excitement. My hair shifts as cat ears break the skin.

"Awe man! I forgot you could do that! Dude, that's so cool!" he says leaning forward to get a better look at the ears. I laugh and make them twitch at him, much to his amusement. "Yo, what have you been up to all summer? How come you stopped answer your texts? Midoriya and I asked Sensei, but he just huffed and walked off!"

I can't stop smiling, even as I duck my head in embarrassment.

"Oh, I… uh, I lost my phone," I admit a little shyly. "Well, kind of... It's a long story. So… I… I've kinda been grounded for three weeks and-"

"Three weeks!" Kirishima exclaims. He glances over his shoulder nervously before turning back with a conspiratorial smirk, "I bet he's as much of a hardass at home as he is at school! Dude, three weeks, that's like the entire summer!"

"What's three weeks?" Ponytail asks curiously, walking over.

"Oh, Hok- I mean, Rin-chan got grounded. That's why nobody's heard from her. That's so long! I'd go insane!"

Iida, who had come over as well, frown at me.

"You're grounded?" he asks, eyes narrowed. "Hoki-chan, you should strive to be more diligent in controlling yourself! As members of such a prestigious school, we should all endeavor to conduct ourselves in a manner befitting of heroes in training-"

"Hey man!" Kirishima grouches, moving sideways to wrap an arm around my shoulder. "You don't even know what she did! Don't start that-"

"Rin-chan!" squeals a voice, interrupting, and I squeak as I'm yanked from the tall redhead into a wall of pink. "Rin-chan! Rin-chan! Rin-chan! You're here! We all tried to text you to come to the pool with us, but you never answered!"

"Oh, Hoki-chan, hello, ribbit!"

I smile and blush and duck away as several more of my classmates arrive and everyone splits into groups. I somehow end up stuck with Mina attached to me, excitedly chattering about her new bathing suit, some dance classes she went to, and how much fun they had at the pool. I wave when I see Mineta-kun, I smile when I catch sight of Midoriya's green curls, and I have to actively try not to glow when Sensei starts giving instructions that I'm far too excited to listen to.

Considering the way his eye twitches when he glances my way, I think he knows it. He doesn't call me out though, clearly more interested in getting through his weird speech. I smile happily.

I've missed this.

I've missed them.

When he finishes, I laugh as the others start dancing and instead make my way to the bus. Some blonde in Class 1B says something, but I ignore him as sit down. I take the fourth seat back and Iida climbs on next, taking the seat across from me. He scowls when nobody follows, jumps up, and starts yelling to direct the class.

Aizawa-sensei takes up the first chair, gives me a sour look, and slumps down for a nap. I giggle.

It stops being quite so funny when everyone boards.

I forgot just how noisy everyone is. At the front of the bus, Mina and Invisible squeal—Toru, I think is her name. Beside them Kirishima and Kaminari loudly obsess over their phones. Iida yells loudly for everyone to be quiet, Midoriya squeaks beside him. Sero, in the far back, shouts excitedly as stares out the window, and the blonde with the laser beam preens as he stands, ignoring Iida who just shouts a little louder and…

I shrink in my seat.

"Why are they so loud…" I grumble.

Beside me, Todoroki gives me a weird look.

"They've always been loud."

I pout.

"I forgot," I mumble. I look over the seats to see what Sensei's doing. The top of his head isn't visible, and I refuse to stand to check. I sigh. Then, remembering my manners, I turn to the dual-haired boy. "Did you have a good break?"

His expression doesn't change.

"It was a break."

I blink and cock my head, sitting up curiously.

"Is that good or bad?" I ask again, wondering if I'm messing up my words. "Did you do anything interesting?"

"I trained," he says raising an eyebrow.

I grin.

"Oh!" I feel my skin warm a little and both his eyebrows furrow in. "Did you learn anything new? Did you train your quirk or your body? Do you train on your own? What do you do?"

"Why are you glowing?" he asks as soon as I breathe.

My cheeks burn and I sit back, feeling embarrassed.

"Oh, uh, it's… it's umm… my quirk. You see, my quirk is, well, it's emotional manifestation, so any time I… uh… I get happy or excited I… I dunno what you call it, I light up? Glow." I duck my head, feeling ridiculous. "I'm sorry, I'm not very good at explaining things."

Todoroki blinks.

"I see."

I have no idea what he sees.

This is so awkward.

I wish Shinsou were here. Maybe I should just pretend he's Shinsou? I try to think about what I would do if the purple-haired boy were beside me now. It isn't a hard question.

I'd hug him. I'd probably hug him and tell him about how I annoyed Sensei and then tell him I thought his game was boring. How do you possibly stay up all night playing this? I glance back towards Sensei's seat. He might get upset about that. He had told me not to hug people in public.

I look back at Todoroki, only to find him staring back.

"Do you like hugs?" I ask suddenly, before realizing I probably should have added the transition. I backpedal quickly at the weird expression. "I mean, I was just thinking about what I'd do if Shinsou were here, he's my best friend, and I'd probably hug him. So I was wondering if you liked hugs. He doesn't, but he lets me hug him anyways. Why… Why are you looking at me like that?"

I pout when he gives me another weird look.

"Yes?"

I blink.

"Yes, you like hugs?" I ask, curiously.

He shrugs.

"I guess. My sister's hugs are okay."

I frown and sit back, scratching my chin.

"You have a sister?" I ask, latching onto the topic. "I have brothers."

He offers a small smile.

"I have brothers as well," he says. "I'm the youngest."

I fold my legs underneath me and grin, feeling my skin glow again.

"Me too," I admit pulling my hair forward. "I have three brothers. I haven't talked to them since I was ten though. They went to a different home. Only my brother Kaito ever wrote me back."

The boy's smile falters, and my light splutters out.

"You were separated?" he asks.

I nod, twisting the ends of my hair.

"Yeah."

He goes silent and I wonder if Sensei would let me visit them. I've never thought to ask. But, I've never been allowed to before either. I pull out my phone, deciding to ask before I forget, and pull up his contact.

When the training camp is over, can I visit my brothers?

I can't hear his phone vibrate or even hear it make a dinging sound over the noise in the bus, but his response is far faster than I was expecting for someone who intended to sleep.

We'll talk about it later.

I smile.

It isn't a no.

I lean back in the seat.

"Do you wanna see my kitten?" I ask instead. "Her name's Miska."

The boy shrugs, so I take it as a yes and pull up the photos. The little smile returns and this time, it doesn't disappear.

.

.

.

We only ride in the bus for about an hour when we stop. I'm thankful. Having spent most of the summer either training or having the ability to wander the apartment, sitting still for an hour is uncomfortable. Especially with excitement still thrumming in my blood.

I stretch and stand and lean against the window as I wait for Todoroki to get off. He doesn't seem in any particular hurry so we're one of the last ones off.

I frown at the expanse of forest below jutting out from the cliff. A single car parked nearby.

My frown deepens.

Why are we here?

I give Sensei an odd look. He ignores me, expression carefully blank as he stares at the car.

"Heya Eraser!" squeals a feminine voice.

I watch with narrowed eyes as two women dressed in skirts and cat-themed accessories start posing by the cliff-face. A little boy gets out to join them, scowling angrily. The Wild, Wild Pussycats. What a weird name. I stop listening as Midoriya starts gushing and they start playing around, instead looking out at the huge expanse. It's kind of like the ocean, but less... less terrifying. Still, it's so big…

Iida, obviously noticing, comes over to elbow me with a narrowed glare.

"Pay attention," he hisses.

I blush.

"Sorry…"

"This whole area here is our territory," one of the women says, pawing and posing as she speaks. "The camp is going to be over there at the foot of the mountain."

"Huh? Then why'd we stop only halfway there?" Uraraka asks.

What a weird question.

To walk... duh...

I shake off Iida and head towards the railing.

"Can we use our quirks?" I ask, leaning over to get a better look at the fall. The blonde cat woman grins.

"Since it's our private land, yes! Great question!"

I ignore my classmates as they dither. Iida, apparently determined to make me behave, starts my way. I look at Sensei, just to make sure I've gotten the right idea.

He gives that stupid grin, arms folded on his chest.

That's a yes.

I climb over the railing and jump.

I can hear several shouts above me as I fall. Wind whips at my face, my braid swirls and twists above me. I ignore them and the nausea in my throat, instead focusing on my shadows. They come to my call immediately, sprouting out my arm and twisting into the familiar dragon claw. I slam it into the Earth, feeling my arm jerk as my descent slows and the rock face breaks off against my face.

The shouts increase and I barely manage to move before what looks like half the cliff comes tumbling down.

"You have three hours!" shouts one of the cats. "Come to the facility on your own two feet! And have fun in the Beast forest!"

I frown and draw back my shadows, looking out at the 'beast' forest and then at my peers.

Are we supposed to help each other?

I suddenly wish I had listened a little better.

"That sounds like it came out of an RPG," grumbles Kaminari. I help him to his feet as Sero, beside him, starts spitting out dirt.

"Are you okay?" I ask worriedly.

The tape-boy turns his dirty face upward and grins.

"Yeah, guess I shoulda followed your lead, huh? How'd you know we were walking?"

I give him a weird look.

"Because Sensei had us get off the bus," I answer honestly. "It'd be irrational to take a break after only an hour of sitting."

Kirishima laughs and beside him, Kaminari does the same.

The laughter ends, however, when Mineta races forward, squeaking about having to pee and a thunderous howl splits the air. My shadows are out in an instant, swirling dangerously around my arms. I slip into my stance automatically, eyes looking around to catch the cause of the chaos. A monster clambers into view, huge and horrific, with horns and fangs and feet the size of a car.

Mineta doesn't move.

I don't think, terror rising as memories swim to the surface.

They're dead because of you. They're dead and it's all your fault, you fucking villain!

Blood on the sidewalk, Sensei's face screwed up in pain.

Yui-san slumped next to him, throat slit and a sideways 8 carved in her forehead.

I blink, Mineta in my arms, shaking and wet.

I don't even remember grabbing him...

The monster disperses into mud as Iida, Bakugou, Midoriya, and Todoroki annihilate it. I put the shorter boy down and try to calm my racing heart.

"Are you okay?" I snap, body trembling as I take up a stance.

"Y-Y-Yes!" he says, and I suck in three deep breaths before I manage to look at him. I realize, in shock, he's crying.

There's another roar in the forest, several followed in quick succession, and I nearly fall apart. What is that? What's going on? More incoming. Danger. I need to move, my body itches with the need. My heart thrums in my chest a quick staccato that threatens to drag my shadows out of control. I take another steadying breath. They're yours, Hellspawn! The others move immediately to intercept, I look the shorter boy over again, trying to find any damage.

All I can see is the large wet spot on the front of his pants.

"Are you hurt?" I ask again, holding his shoulder. "You're crying, why?"

"I peed on myself!" he snarls.

I blink at the fury, and then, with realization, at the shame.

I reach forward and grab his arm, jerking us further into the shadows. What do I do? What do I do? What do I- It's hard to think with the monsters exploding around us, it's hard to think with the fear and terror and images—eyes, dead eyes, and smoke drifting towards the sun.

I can taste ashes in the air, the sounds of bombs exploding—no, they're dirt monsters. Dirt.

"You can have my shorts," I tell him shortly.

I don't bother to step into the bushes, I just reach under my skirt and pull the hem of the shorts down. I step out of them and drop them in his hand still warm. They'll probably be a bit big for him, but at least he won't have to wear wet clothes.

"There, hurry up and change," I tell him sharply. I frown when I notice the blood leaking from his nose and scowl. "I thought you said you weren't hurt. Did you hit your head? You're bleeding!"

He seems to pull it together at my anger.

I'm forced to turn my attention away as one of the monsters find us. He scurries into a bush.

I summon my shadows and wrap the entire thing in them. Since the monsters aren't alive—aren't people, I don't have to hold back. Multiple tentacles swim forward and surround it, choking it and crushing it in their grip. I twist my fist and pulverize its throat. The head falls forward as it crumbles.

The bushes rattle and I turn, ready to strike again.

Mineta steps out, looking ridiculous in our uniform shirt and tie with loose black shorts. He smiles weirdly, blood still leaking from his nose.

I ignore him in favor of the threats. My shadows tear apart another monster and I shiver at the ease of it.

Villain.

There's no time to consider it. Screams and the sounds of battle wash over us.

Wrapping my arms in tentacles, I join the others. I lose track of Mineta almost immediately, too caught up in the destruction. I do watch Dark Shadow though, especially when I hear him cursing about predators and death. When he nearly takes a swipe for me, I'm mindful to keep an extra-large distance between us. Tokoyami sends me a grateful glance. I push forward. Three hours. I can feel the time slipping away as we're stopped continuously by beasts.

So I suppose it shouldn't be a surprise when I end up working beside Bakugou.

The blonde does not appreciate it.

"Get the fuck out of my way, you dumbass!" he snaps when I extend my tentacles to wrap around a monster's neck. He blows off its head with ease. "I don't need your help!"

I ignore him and catch two more.

I could probably do it myself, but three hours is a long time to continuously use my quirk, and I'd already learned from Yamada-sensei I don't have that kind of stamina. I race on foot to keep up as he flies through the air.

I've never been so thankful for that stupid obstacle course.

I manage to jump over ravines, hurdle over fallen trees, and high step through some rather thick muck. As we cover uneven ground, I don't trip or even have to slow. When the ground beneath me shakes and explodes into a monster, I not only keep my footing, I also manage to scale its side and jump from its back to a nearby tree branch.

Midoriya destroys that one, looking wide-eyed when I hang there for a moment just to breathe. Despite my newfound agility, my heart still pounds in my chest and I twitch at every mound of dirt. Unfortunately, hanging from trees hurts. And I don't have on shorts. I use my shadows to drop nearly three stories beside him. The clawed tentacles leave gouges in the tree as they slow my fall, though my knees still rattle on impact. I grimace, tired.

"Dude, Rin-chan, that was so manly!" shouts Kirishima. I glance his way to see him pumping his fist in the air. "You didn't even use your quirk to get away!"

"Uh… thanks?" I manage, not really sure how to respond. I rotate my stretched arms and wipe the sweat from my face. I end up falling in step beside Midoriya instead. He shoots me a weary, red-face grin.

"That was really cool," he admits.

My face feels too hot and sticky to blush. I manage a forced smile instead.

"Oh… uh, thanks."

It takes nearly eight hours for us to get through that forest.

Even working together to clear a path, it's nearly five by the time we find our cabin. I'm so thankful, I nearly fall over. I've never felt so exhausted: physically, emotionally, anything. I can't feel my arms anymore, my muscles ache with fatigue, my head spins with a lack of food and water, and I'm not sure I could call my quirk again even if I wanted to.

I stumble out near the back of the class, body covered in scratches, hands scraped raw, and unsurprised to find Sensei smirking at us all.

He's so sadistic.

"You said it'd only take three hours," Sero complains, looking ready to fall over.

"I'm so hungry I could die!" grumbles Kirishima beside him, only barely standing. Everyone looks a mess, even the near unflappable Bakugou and energetic Iida.

"Sorry," laughs the dark-haired cat woman looking anything but sorry. "I mean, that's how long it would've taken us…"

"Hehehe!" the blonde cackles, one paw on her hip as she strikes a pose. She kind of reminds me of Aunt Nemuri. "We actually thought it'd take you longer. You guys did a great job dealing with the Earth beasts too. Not bad, especially you four!"

As everyone's eyes fall to Iida, Midoriya, Bakugou, and Todoroki, I can't help but sigh in relief that I'm not included in that group.

"You four must have experience fighting villains!"

Someone clears their throats, it looks like Frog-chan though I can't be sure. Whatever they're going to say, however, is lost as the cat woman starts doing some ridiculous dance and talking about having fun in a few years, and I'm just really too tired to care about this.

I yawn, covering my mouth, and leaning against a nearby tree.

Sensei catches my eye, he frowns but says nothing.

I wanna nap.

I wonder what he's been doing all this time anyway.

I bet he's been napping in his yellow sleeping bag. That thing's so comfortable. I wish I could have one. I'd asked him if I could get a blue one. He'd told me no. So mean. Waking up in it is like waking up in a hug and-

I stiffen when Midoriya lets out a wilted scream. I spin, thin and deadly shadows rising from shaking arms. I nearly snarl to find that little boy from earlier punching Midoriya in the nuts.

Iida immediately jumps to the green-haired boy's rescue, but the child just starts walking off.

"Nephew!" screeches the brunette.

Nobody moves to stop him.

Not the cat women.

Not the students.

Not Sensei.

"I can't abide jerks who wanna be-"

He cuts off when I snag him by his shirt.

He lets out a loud squawk as I drag him close.

"That's rude," I scowl. When he attempts to punch my face, I catch his wrist and squeeze. "You're rude."

"Let me go!" he snarls.

I do.

"You're beyond lucky," I growl at him, forgetting where I am. "Had you done that to anyone else, they would have broken your jaw."

He splutters and stares.

"Rin," Sensei snaps. I look up and glare, too tired and angry to care that most of the class is staring at me in shock and surprise. I meet Sensei's gaze defiantly.

"What?"

There's a general intake of breath.

Eraserhead's eyes narrow.

"Stay behind." He turns to the rest of the class and scowls. "Drop off your things in your rooms, dinner is in the mess hall. After that, you'll bathe and then bedtime. We'll start training tomorrow. Now hurry up."

I don't move, arms crossed defiantly over my chest.

My classmates whisper as they leave. Sensei waits for all of them to leave.

"Do not do that again," he says sharply.

I glare.

"Do what?" I shout. "Deal with the situation? You let him hurt Midoriya! You didn't even say anything! You just let him walk off like it was okay and-"

"Lower your voice," Sensei growls. "The rules haven't changed because we're somewhere else."

"What rules?" I growl. "Make up your mind! Are you my teacher or my guardian?"

"I am both," he snaps. "Or do you not call me Sensei? Now calm down and breathe or I'm going to put you on that stump for ten minutes."

I glare.

Sensei reaches in his pocket and pulls out a timer. I want to scream.

Damn him.

I grab my hair, squat down, and take ten, deep, draining breaths. When I finish, I'm still angry, so I take three more. Sensei doesn't move from his position, arms still folded across his chest, eyes still narrow and ticking.

He should take his own breaths, I think uncharitably.

"There," I gripe. "Are we done?"

His nostrils flare.

"No, we are not done," he says sharply. "Your behavior in front of your peers is unacceptable. You will not speak to me like that in public again."

"Yes, sir," I answer caustically.

"You're about to earn another day of grounding," he says coldly. "You do not speak to your teachers like that. Period. If you spoke to Hizashi or Nemuri like that I would ground you for three days."

"Yeah, well Aunt Nemuri and Hizashi wouldn't let a little kid punch their classmate and do nothing," I growl. "You didn't even try to help him! You don't do anything! You don't even care!"

"Stop."

"No!" I snarl. "No! You stop! You let him hit him and you did nothing! You didn't even try!"

Sensei points to a nearby stump and thrusts the timer in my hand. I don't think, I just toss it towards the forest and stomp off towards the stump. I put my back to the dark-haired man, fold up, and sob.

You didn't even try!

You don't care!

You're the only one with…

I choke on my cries as I hyperventilate. My head spins faster, my heart thumping in my ears, my breath comes too fast and I can't breathe. I can't breathe. I can't-

I can't-

Sensei's there, hands in my hair and pushing me forward between my knees.

"Breathe Rin."

I gasp, dirt and spit dripping in long strings from my lips. I try to count, but I can't think, can't catch my breath. The world blackens on the edges as my body shakes, the terror from the forest finally catching up.

"Rin, I need you to take ten deep breaths or you're going to pass out."

I try again, sucking in and hiccupping. I manage five and the calloused fingers pull me upright, press a water bottle to my lips, and I splutter as I try to drown in it. The cool liquid feels sweet as it slides down my throat and drips down my chin and-

He pulls it away and I tremble as he caps the bottle. Fingers weave through my hair, soothing as the tears start again.

"Rin, why are you crying?"

"You don't care!" I whimper, dirty hands moving to my face, palms pressing against my eyes. I hiccup again and lean forward. "You didn't even try-"

"Stop," he commands, his voice more frustrated than angry. "If I truly didn't care I wouldn't be out here now."

"You let him hurt him!" I cry, pulling away to stare at him. "You didn't do anything- You didn't even try-"

"Rin," he interrupts again. "That is not my child. I am not about to discipline someone else's kid whether they need it or not. No, he should not have punched Midoriya, but I didn't intervene because the boy didn't do any real damage. Midoriya should have minded his own business and read the situation better. That child's been glaring at you all since you arrived."

I choke as his logic seeps through.

And then I shake, feeling somehow both humiliated and overwhelmed.

I gasp for breath and try to regulate it again.

Sensei sighs, leaning forward to pick leaves from my hair as he runs his fingers through the mess.

"What is this really about?" he asks when my breath settles.

I press my forehead against his chest and shudder.

"I… I don't know," I whisper, curling up. "I… I'm sorry Sensei. I…"

He breathes deeply, the sound long and loud.

"I would rather you walk off than talk to me like that in front of your classmates," Sensei says rather sourly. "The only reason I don't suspend you for that spectacle is because that panic attack was far worse than anything you've had in weeks. I've also never heard you use the phrase 'You didn't even try' and yet you used it here multiple times. Where is that from?"

I shiver. He frowns, waiting.

"M-M-M-My br-brothers," I whisper.

His frown deepens, eyes narrowing.

"Your brothers," he repeats slowly. "When did your brothers say that?"

"Wh-Wh-When the h-h-hero h-h-hit D-D-Daddy," I answer, arms shaking. I reach out, fingers curling in his dark uniform. "S-S-Sensei… h-h-hug-"

He stands and pulls me up with him. He allows me to latch onto his middle. I shove my face into his clothes, smearing snot and dirt on it even as the smell of detergent and safety overpowers the ashes and explosions. I cry again, shoulders shaking, in relief.

"Rin," he says, voice strained. "If this is too much, then stop. You do not have to be a hero, there are a thousand other jobs more suitable for you. But breaking down like this all the time isn't healthy. I can call Hizashi or Nemuri to come and get you. Because tomorrow and the next day and the day after are all going to be just as difficult. You cannot break down like this every time-"

"No," I interrupt, fingers curling into his clothes. "No."

He pulls me away and scowls.

"Why?" he growls.

"I'm going to protect you," I tell him, staring up at his face with blurrily. I clutch him tighter. "Please. I'll get stronger."

His shoulders sag and he rubs his neck, looking torn. He drags my head back into his chest and sighs.

"You are going to drive me crazy," he says after a moment, sounding somehow both cross and long-suffering. "Your brothers wanted you to stop the hero from attacking your father?"

"Yes, sir," I answer muffled into his chest.

He growls.

"Of course they did," he says acidly. "Had you attacked that hero with your quirk, you would have been considered complicit in the crime. The use of brute force against a quirkless man, while unethical, is not illegal. You would have been taken into custody immediately and your family would have gone hungry that much sooner. Using your quirk to attack anyone without proper authorization is unlawful. Choosing not to get involved was the best choice you could have made."

Something in my chest aches.

"It… It was?" I whisper, looking up.

"Yes," he repeats again, expression stern.

I sigh, closing my tired eyes, and slump forward. He huffs but holds me up.

"Go wash your face and eat dinner," Sensei says, voice gruff. "I need to speak with Vlad. Do try to behave at the hot springs. I'll check on you when the day's over."

I nod and stand, pulling away.

"And Rin-"

I pause. He frowns, sticking his hands in his pocket.

"Please refrain from giving articles of your clothing to your peers, especially your shorts. Particularly to Mineta."

I look down and scuffle my shoe.

"Oh… um, yes, sir."

He walks away and I reluctantly go to wash my face.

.

.

.

After washing away my tear tracks and most of the dirt coating my hands and face, I end up taking down my hair. It's a complete mess and I don't feel particularly inclined to braid it back, so I stuff the hairbow in my side pocket and leave it down. Sweeping it behind my ear, I head towards the mess hall.

It isn't hard to find.

The smells coming from it are delicious.

I hesitate and head to the kitchen first though, stomach grumbling at the amazing scents. The two cat women are there along with another. I bow to the dark-haired one chopping vegetables.

"Do… Do you need help?" I ask quietly.

She pauses and looks my way, face warm.

"Oh, it's you! Eraserhead's girl, huh? I heard Vlad teasing him earlier."

"Oh," I interrupt, pulling at my fingers. She blinks and her wide dark eyes remind me of Miska. I wish she were here. "I… I can help."

The woman gives a kind smile.

"Not tonight, dear. Go eat and relax, you'll all get your chance to cook tomorrow."

I bow politely.

"Yes, ma'am."

"Awe, how adorable!" she squeaks as I leave.

I pass the boy from earlier, his expression somewhere between disgust and fear. I don't glance his way, hands curling into fists. Instead, I walk out into the open air, grabbing a plate and looking awkwardly at the four rows of tables. Two of them are full of students I don't know, though some of which I recognize from the Sports Festival.

That seems like a lifetime ago.

I grimace.

"Oh! Hoki-chan, you can sit by me!" says Frog-chan as she passes me with a plate of food. "I like your hair down too, ribbit."

I offer her a small, thankful smile and sit between her and Iida, somewhat uncomfortable at the closeness. I can feel the heat radiating off him, and smell the exhaust. Beside me, Frog—ah… I have no idea what her name is, smiles.

"Oh, Rin-chan! There you are!" Mina squeals on Frog-chan's other side. "I hope Sensei didn't chew you out too badly-"

I frown and make a noncommittal sound. Shinsou often did that when he wanted to be left alone or if he were particularly annoyed. I grab a spoonful of food, not caring what, and some rice.

Iida turns then, scowling from behind thick glasses.

"Hoki-chan, while I too find the actions of that young man quite disturbing, as class president, I am concerned by this new unruliness! Grounded for three weeks and now to be so disrespectful? As UA students, it's our duty to uplift the values of our school to-"

"Please stop," I interrupt, looking him in the eye.

He flinches, expression shuttering and he looks almost hurt.

I scowl, turn back to my food, and break open my chopsticks.

Who does he think he is?

Sensei just yelled, why is he fussing to? I got it.

I don't even manage to get the food to my lips before the guilt rears up.

I drop it back on my plate with an angry sigh and wrinkle my nose.

You're not the only one with low self-esteem.

I miss my bed. I already miss home. Why is this so hard? It's never this hard with Shinsou or Aizawa-sensei or even Aunt Nemuri!

I sigh heavily before looking over. Iida turns back to his own food and I falter, not sure how to make this better. If it were Sensei, he'd just tell me to go away and be fine later. If it were Yamada-sensei... I don't know, he rarely got like this. And if it were Shinsou... well I'd hug him and apologize. I work through the options for a moment, staring at my plate. I decide on a compromise and lean against Iida's shoulder instead, resting my forehead on the stiff fabric of his uniform. I can feel his muscles seize like he's not really sure what to do.

"I'm sorry," I mumble. "I'm hungry and tired and Sensei already fussed. Please don't."

On Iida's other side, Uraraka leans forward giggling.

"Hoki-chan, you're so cute!"

"Oh!" Mina interrupts, hanging onto Frog-chan like she did to me at the mall. "She prefers Rin-chan! We found out at the Mall. Right Rin-chan!"

I sigh tiredly and sit up.

Iida seems to remember how to breathe.

"Ah… yes."

"Oh! Then you should call me Ochako!" Bubbly says, dancing a little in her seat. It's not anywhere near the level of excitement as her dance from earlier.

"And you can call me Tsuyu, ribbit!" Frog-chan agrees, smiling. "You should have said something earlier."

"I… I'm not good with words," I admit, feeling a little overwhelmed at all of their attention. I'm thankful that across from me, at least Explosive is more interested in his food then the conversations. I lift a bite to my lips and still. "That's... That's really good…"

I don't hesitate to take another bite, and before I can stop myself, I've eaten my entire plate.

It's delicious.

Way better than chicken and bland vegetables.

I grab a second plate. Beside Bakugou, Invisible—Toru I think, turns towards me. Or at least, I think she does considering her clothes do. I can't ever really tell with her.

"Rin-chan, seconds? Aren't you worried about your figure?"

Mina frowns.

"I don't think any of us need to worry about that," Tsuyu says with a shrug. "We're all going to be doing intense training this week, right?"

"That's true," Toru says, sounding thoughtful. "But aren't you guys even a little worried about looking manly with all of that muscle?"

I have no idea what she's talking about.

Midoriya, on Bakugou's other side, blushes and offers up a new topic.

"So, uh, Iida-kun, how is your brother doing?"

I perk up at that, excited for something I actually understand.

"He's doing better," the tall boy says proudly. He dramatically pulls his arm across his chest, and I rethink my initial assessment. Better? Was he doing bad? "He's been doing physical therapy every day and he's managed to stand on his own for nearly ten seconds now with support."

"Oh that's amazing!" the green-haired boy exclaims, looking genuinely delighted.

"Did something happen to him?" I ask curiously.

Iida twitches, his face going tight. I immediately regret asking.

Wow, you really suck at this.

"I mean, you don't have to tell me," I quickly add, trying to think of what Shinsou would do. I hold up my hands nervously. "It's okay if you don't want to say anything!"

The tall boy's face pinks and he smiles appreciatively, rubbing his neck.

"Ah, thank you! I… He got hurt in the line of duty," he says a little awkwardly. "They thought he'd be paralyzed for life. So him being able to stand…"

He cuts off and I notice the tears brimming in his eyes behind his glasses.

I uncomfortably pat his back.

"Hey, if you're all done, you should go take a bath!" shouts the blonde cat lady. I still, eyebrows furrowing.

What?

"Together?"

Bakugou snorts, finally putting down his bowl to glare.

"You're a fucking dumb ass. It's a hot spring."

I blush.

"Oh."