It takes too long to pull myself together. Too long to pick myself up and drag myself towards Midoriya and the others. They hoover around Midoriya and the dark mass beside him. And that's when I notice it isn't a mass at all.
It's a person.
Small, compact...
My breath catches in my throat as my thoughts stutter to a halt. Mineta? The Ninja shoots me a look, and even though I can only see his eyes, they look worried. I clutch my arm to my stomach and stagger forward.
I don't understand. I don't understand how we were walking and suddenly we're not.
Where are we?
What happened?
I struggle and collapse between Midoriya's sobbing form and Todoroki's quiet one. Mineta, curled on the ground is unconscious, a large cut above his head spilling blood. It makes me sick. I'm scared that there will be a sideways 8 underneath.
But his chest moves.
"He's… He's not dead," I whisper, reaching out. Nobody stops me as I pull the small boy towards me, as I reach out and touch his face and cry.
Tears stream down my face.
It's baby soft.
"He saved you," the Ninja whispers, looking completely overwhelmed. "You and Tokoyami. A magician caught you, was going to kidnap you… We couldn't-"
Midoriya lets out another scream, so heart-wrenching I can feel the wounds in my own chest opening. I try to sweep the blood his face, but it only smears. My hands shake as I pull his head into my lap, as I lean forward and weep.
He doesn't wake.
"M-Mineta-kun," I manage to choke out. "P-P-Please wake up. P-P-Please…"
Nobody says anything and my fingers curl in his shirt, anger and rage snarling in my chest.
I turn to Todoroki and glare.
"Why was he even here?" I snap. I wipe my eyes with my arm and want to scream. My hands clench in his shirt, dirty and sooty. "He was supposed to be with Sensei! Why was- Why is he here!?"
"He yelled your name," Todoroki says.
I flinch.
What?
"Why?" I cry, face wrinkling as I struggle to think, to understand.
Why did he come here?
Your advances are not appreciated or appropriate. If you wish to continue this friendship that she clearly values, you will control yourself and act accordingly.
He didn't care.
I thought he didn't care!
"He's the only reason they didn't take you and Tokoyami," the Ninja says, and Tokoyami flinches beside him. He was caught as well? How many… How…
The bushes behind us rattle.
I twist, looking back even as the others do.
Tsuyu. Ochako.
Three figures float behind them. Kyoka, Toru, the boy from 1B. Tsuyu and Ochako's faces twist in surprise and then, to fear as they sweep across the clearing.
He's gone.
Bakugou's gone.
My brother has him.
Kaito.
Kaito, why?
Nobody knows what to do. The girls go to Midoriya, and then Tsuyu's eyes widen as she comes towards me. She cries the moment she sees the small body, Mineta's head bloody, expression lost in unconsciousness.
"Mineta-kun," she whispers.
Ochako turns, eyes filling with tears.
"Is he-"
"He's unconscious," Tokoyami manages to say. "We… We should return. Sensei… The Pros will need to know."
Sensei.
I intend to gather Mineta, to carry him as long as my arms will hold out, but Todoroki stops me, leaning forward to take the boy instead. Ninja carries an inconsolable Midoriya, Ochako float the other three figures, and I pull Toru, Tokoyami pulls Kyoka, and Tsuyu helps a stumbling Ochako.
That's when I learn we're all the way in the back of the forest where we started.
I want to hurl.
I can't, there's nothing left to even gag on.
.
.
.
The sight of Aizawa-sensei, after the horrible nightmare that this night has been, is like the first rays of dawn. When he appears, I give up all pretenses of control and race towards him. He's sweaty and ragged, and my arms wrap easily around him, my head slamming into his chest.
But he doesn't push me away even as I can hear the others behind me. Ochako releases her quirk and vomits.
Calloused, pointed fingers card through my hair, pulling me close. I sob into his chest. He smells like smoke and clay and sweat and blood.
"Sensei," I whisper, eyes watering. "Sensei it was- it was-"
I choke on the words. He doesn't let go, I'm thankful. I can't… I can't…
"You're having a panic attack," he says quietly, pushing me to my knees. I gasp for breath and he pulls my head forward, I can hear the others behind me to stare. "It's alright Rin. I'm here. Breathe, count to ten."
I suck in each horrid breath, Sensei's fingers grounding me.
"Sensei," Tsuyu cries, voice cracking. "Bakugou..."
Sensei's fingers press into my hair.
"There are ambulances a little further ahead," he says, voice solid. "Uraraka, Tokoyami, Tsuyu, can I trust you three to get the four students that far?"
"Yes, sir," they answer quietly.
Uraraka sucks in a steadying breath and activates her quirk. She turns green even as Tokoyami and Tsuyu help move the floating figures. Pale-faced and dirty. My breath chokes in my lungs as they pass, my fingers dig into his shirt.
"They took him," Midoriya chokes out from Ninja's back. I can feel Sensei stiffen, can feel his fingers jabbing into my shoulder, can feel the sudden intake of breath. "They took- they took- they-"
"Shoji put him down. Midoriya, you're having a panic attack, you need to breathe. Rin, stay here."
Sensei pulls away and goes to the green-haired boy hyperventilating in the grass. My chest aches at the emptiness, at the loss. Sensei pushes his head between his legs and looks at the others.
"Was anyone else taken?"
"No," Todoroki says. He hesitates as he looks at me. "They attempted to take Tokoyami and Hoki. Mineta… Mineta managed to save them."
Sensei grimaces, his hands moving through curly green hair.
"Shoji, your hand?" Sensei asks, and I look over to finally notice an entire appendage is missing. I lean sideways and dry heave. Todoroki steps into my view.
"It will grow back," the Ninja—Shoji, says. "It was an extra. Sensei, the villains took him. We… We couldn't stop…"
"You did your best," Sensei says gruffly, and there's a tone there I've never heard. "You and Todoroki head to the ambulance, I'll bring these two."
The dual-haired boy doesn't move. Shoji does.
Sensei gives him a second glance.
"Yes?"
"A masked man was in the forest," Todoroki states grimly. I flinch. Sensei lets out a growl. "He attempted to kill her and threatened to kill Bakugou."
"Asp," Sensei says in a low voice. "I am aware of him."
Kaito.
"It's her brother," Todoroki states plainly.
There's an indrawn breath and I lean forward, feeling the pieces I'd been desperately trying to hold together splinter and fall apart.
"Shit."
Sensei manages to pull Midoriya on his back and returns to me. He pulls me to my feet and directs us all to the main area.
It's all chaos.
The fire department races through the area, EMT's work outside on makeshift benches, and everyone is rounded up and placed in ambulances. People are crying, children shaking, someone's throwing up in a bush. Sensei reluctantly leaves, having handed off our classmates. His hand squeezes my shoulder as he goes, moving to help two of 1B's students from falling over.
I shiver when a stern-faced man reaches for me, trying to take me to the ambulance van.
"No," I tell him.
His face wrinkles in disapproval and my chest tightens dangerously, hysterical at the idea of riding in an ambulance with these strangers.
That's where they put the ones I hurt.
It's irrational and idiotic. I've ridden in one before.
But I can't.
I physically quake at the idea of getting in there.
"Rin-chan!"
I look up, eyes still filled with terror, as Mina hurries over and grabs my arm, hugging me desperately to her chest. She's so much cleaner than me, but she doesn't seem to care. I nearly fall into her embrace. A small piece of me, a part I wasn't even aware of, slightly untightens.
"You're okay! I was so worried!" she says, pulling away. She looks me over and grimaces as she sees my expression, feeling my shivers. She turns to the man now waiting impatiently for me to come. "What's wrong?"
"We need to transport all of you students to the hospital for examination," says the stern man. "If you and your friend could step into the vehicle...?"
I shake as she blinks down at me.
I don't wanna go.
"We'll ride together," she says, looping her pink arm again mine. "It'll be fine, we'll be together!"
I don't want to. I don't want to leave Sensei.
But I don't want to stay either.
I nod, slowly.
She clambers up and I follow slowly after.
.
.
.
Aizawa-Sensei doesn't come to the hospital.
Yamada-sensei does. I'm thankful for it as he sits on the side of my bed and runs a hand through my hair. I don't want to be alone. My thoughts are nightmares that even sleep won't let me escape from. I see him, Kaito, everywhere. His eyes reflect back in the windowpane, his scarred face in my mirror, his lips twisted in that horrid expression.
I can't stop reliving the dagger as he swings it forward, intent to plunge it through my throat.
"Hey Glow Worm…" the blonde man whispers, petting my head as I curl into his form, tears slipping down my face. "Come on, don't cry. I'm here, you're safe, I've got you. I've always got you, you dig? Ain't nobody gonna touch you when you're with me, I promise…"
I hiccup and bury my face in the pillow next to him.
He sighs.
I open my mouth to try, to try to tell him anything, but I can't. Words won't come, just the tears that never seem to end, the cries that echo in the tiny hospital room. I choke on them, coughing until the blonde man is visibly freaking out and pulling me up into his arms.
He holds me like he used to, my head against his chest, the sound of his heart in my ear.
He holds me until I can't cry anymore.
And when I still can't speak, he holds me until I fall asleep, his hands rubbing soothing circles in that strange, unfamiliar bed.
.
.
.
Kaminari visit me later. Without windows, I don't know if it's day or night.
The blonde swallows as soon as he enters.
"Rin-chan?" he asks.
I stare, hollow-eyed back.
"Rin-chan, are… are you okay?"
No.
I don't say it though. I can't seem to find the words, can't seem to find anything.
No, I'm not okay.
How could I ever be okay again?
I don't have the words to name this hollow ache in my chest, the dizzying taste of the world, or even the strange tint that now colors everything so much less brightly. I stare at him and say nothing. What could I say?
My brother wants me dead.
He destroyed an entire foster home in revenge.
He ruined so many people's lives. He hurt people.
Because of me.
I hate you. I hate your face, your name, your quirk, your everything. I'm going to destroy you, just like you did me.
Hero.
Enjoy watching your world fall apart, hero.
Fuck heroes. Fuck your stupid quirk. Go be one if you want, it's not like you ever did shit for us anyways.
"Rin-chan," Kaminari says again, this time his fingers reach out, pressing into my hand. He looks horrified when I finally manage to look at him. "You're… You're crying."
I touch my cheeks.
So numb, I can't even feel the wetness.
I close my eyes and lay back down in the bed. He takes up the stool and chair Yamada-sensei had abandoned. And when he quietly leans forward and cries, my hand clutched in his own, I can't join him.
I say nothing, and eventually, he leaves.
.
.
.
Several people visit, though I don't speak to any of them. They come alone or in small pairs. Ochako and Tsuyu, Sero and Mina, Iida, and then Todoroki.
Kirishima visits me last.
He chokes at the sight of my shirt. Bakugou's shirt.
"We're going to rescue him," he says after a second. He looks at me and despite his quirk not being active. His eyes are hard specks. "We're going to save him."
I stare and he sort of just deflates.
He moves to sit on the stool beside me. Yamada-sensei had sat there before he'd had to leave. Aunt Nemuri would probably be by soon.
"Midoriya told us what happened."
Something inside me aches. It's so deep though, that I smother it back down. It's easy. A practiced sort of easy. Like tying a shoe or braiding my hair. It's how I survived. The gas stations. The gray suits. The acid in my shirt, melting away my flesh, blistering my skin.
Kaito.
"Hey man—Hoki, you're kinda scaring me," Kirishima says quietly. "You… you don't look okay. The others, I know they said- I… I never mind."
"Hero?" she laughs, showing the video again. "That's no hero!"
What do you say to that?
"I was going to ask you to come," he says. "But… But, I don't think that's a good idea."
"They'll stop you," I tell him. It's the first thing I've said since I'd arrived. It feels idiotic, pointing out the obvious. Red grimaces.
"I've figured out their pattern," Kirishima admits. "We're leaving tonight."
Then, as if realizing he's just told this to Aizawa-sensei's ward, he curses.
"Shit, Rin-chan, I- crap, I shouldn't have said anything. You- You can't tell anyone, at least, at least not till we've left."
I frown.
"Why?" I manage.
He looks at me for a moment and then scowls at the ground.
"Look I… I was in that class with Sensei. I… I had to just- to just sit there and listen to them tell us my best friend was under attack! And now, he's being held hostage and there's a chance I can help. I won't just sit back and wait. I- I can't! I'm… how can I call myself a hero much less a man, damn it!"
His passion sparks another emotion, deep within my chest.
I bury it just as quickly.
"Oh."
His jaw drops as he looks at me.
"Oh?"
I shrug and curl my arms around my legs, staring blankly over my knees. Past the door and machines and the overpowering smell of soaps.
Hesitantly, he touches my hand.
I don't look back.
After a long silent stretch, he leaves too.
They always do.
.
.
.
The others sneak out of the hospital and I watch with numb, hollow eyes as the different teachers look for them. Present Mic is throwing a conniption, already racing around the block, Ectoplasm takes to the skies, and Midnight, dressed in her typical, exposed costume, prowls the hospital halls. She frowns when she notices me, still wearing Bakugou's shirt, standing at a window. She slips beside me towards the window.
"You know where they are, baby girl?"
Shit, Hoki, I- crap, I shouldn't have said anything. You- You can't tell anyone, at least, at least not till we've left
I nod and she scowls.
"How long have they been gone?" she asks, and her voice loses all of its melodic nature.
"Hours," I answer quietly. She curses, hands clenched, and pulls out a cellphone.
"Shouta." I furrow my brows at the name of my guardian. "I need you to talk to your child."
I sigh as the phone is thrust against my ear. I stare with baleful eyes at my 'aunt' before finding the energy to hold it there.
"Rin."
He pauses and I say nothing. But he must hear the sound of my breath because he goes on.
"What is she talking about?"
I don't answer right away. If I had more energy, perhaps I would have shrugged. Instead, I watch the shape of Ectoplasm springing across the moonlight.
"Rin," he says sharply.
"They lost the others."
There's a pause and I can hear the annoyance in it. I can almost see his eyes twitching.
"What do you mean lost the others. Who's gone? When did they leave?"
"I don't know… They just noticed."
There's a rustle of gritted teeth.
"Did you know they were leaving?" he asks. His voice is short and clipped. I sigh through my nose.
"Yes."
"Why did you not alert an adult?"
"They asked me not to."
There's a noise and I can hear Sensei's muffled cursing as he puts his hand over the receiver. Wherever he is, he doesn't sound happy about the choice. I hit the red hang-up button and hand it back to Midnight. She stares, mouth dropping at the black screen before Shouta Aizawa's name reappears.
"Did you just hang-"
"I'm going to bed," I tell her already moving away.
My own phone buzzes in my room. I don't answer. I don't want to know what it says.
I close my eyes.
.
.
.
Aizawa-sensei is furious.
I finally look at my phone in the morning. There are several missed calls, not just from Sensei, but from Shinsou and my classmates as well, along with too many messages. I don't read them, clicking only on my guardian's. He leaves me only one. I sigh as I read it.
If you ever hang up on me like that again, the consequences will be severe.
Yamada-sensei is less than pleased as well.
"You, little listener, are in sooo much trouble." His disappointment is almost physical. He crosses his arms, his eyebrows pinched, and glowers.
I feel nothing.
I stare blankly back.
His glower turns to a scowl.
"Those kids could have been seriously hurt," Yamada-sensei says. He waives his hand as he speaks, pacing the room. "You letting them go like that without telling an adult is the same as going yourself. No, it's worse! Because if they got hurt and you knew about it, it'd make you-"
"A villain," I say, looking at him with hollow eyes.
He gapes.
"NO! Seriously, Rin? It'd make you responsible!"
I stare down at my hands. He continues on, arms waving, voice rising and falling in a way that exhausts me just to hear it.
How many people have I hurt with these hands? With my powers? How many lives have I destroyed? How many as badly as my brother's.
I see dark eyes.
Hateful, angry, dark eyes. A dagger hurtling towards my throat.
Kaito.
"Are you listening?" Present Mic asks.
"No."
I close my eyes and pretend to fall asleep.