Hello! Sorry for the wait! Yes, this is the mess Maruki created, but wait and see what kind of clusterfuck I have lying in wait :P It is some of the more original content with mythologies exploration and some slow burn, so yes... but they aren't the main focus. I focus mostly on the angst! If you do not like it, it's okay, it's not everyone's cup of tea. Just... warning in advance lol
Also to Guest-san, yes, I have explored that possibility that the SEES wouldn't have their memories changed, but I think it's better that they are, because unlike with the Theives - Ren and Goro in particular - they accept their deaths, but don't really have the will to rebel as strong as Ren's. But I understand your point, I really do! But well... for the angst? And suspense? lol?
Anyways, let's go! :D
No special warning here, just more P5R 3rd semester spoilers!
WARNING: I TRIED, BUT SOME TYPO MAY REMAIN, SO SORRY IN ADVANCE
The Distorted Reality
The world is different.
He wakes up inside a place that looks oddly familiar to the counseling room, down to the minutest of details – from the way the couch turns slightly to the left, or the way there's a coffee stain on the woods of the coffee table. He looks down, and he's wearing his prisoner strips he used to adorn during his days under the False God's guidance.
He looks around. The world seems… distorted, darkened. Raoul doesn't stir nor move inside him, or rather, he isn't here. But his connection with the Sea of Souls remains, so he wonders what would cause Raoul to not respond at all.
He gets up, feeling light, as if floating in the air, his bare feet pressing against the cold floor. He makes his way out of the room, and true enough, he seems to be inside Shujin. But there is not a single soul here with him, and his only friend in the vast, expanding hallways are his own footsteps as he pads his way dazedly down the hall, the familiar feeling of the pulls of the Metaverse, infinitesimal as it is, paws at the back of his mind.
He could hear voices – his friends, talking about their regrets, about things they wish were different, about the past that can no longer be corrected. They lament, they recall – and then, he moves on. They – all of them – know that clinging to the past will help with nothing but brewing their hatred for the world, so they all realize that the best they could do is to move on and live their lives the best they could.
The only voices that do not make it into his senses are those of Goro, who knows better than anyone the bitter taste of clinging to the idea of revenge, and of Mochizuki, whose existence alone provides all the answers to life's questions.
He follows the faint glow of the blue butterfly as it guides him further and further, into the familiar road that takes him to the exit of the school. And before he could step out of the school, his hand placed against the cool glass beneath his fingers, a voice calls to him.
"Where are you going?"
"Home," He replies, without so much as missing a single second. His home – and home is where his friends, his family, are. Leblanc, Boss, the Thieves – they are all his home. And he wants to go back to them.
There is a brief moment of nothing but statics behind the curtains of stale air before the voice speaks again, pensive, thoughtful. "I see… So you haven't accepted it yet, then."
Accept what?
But before he could voice it aloud, the door finally gives in under his palm, and as he walks out, the voice calls out after him.
"Then… let's meet again, Amamiya-kun."
January 1st, 2017 [Sunday]
He wakes up to the crisp, cold air of New Year's morning.
It takes him a while to blink the sleepiness away, his bed half-frozen by the temperature outside. He could see neither Goro nor Mochizuki up here, so he thinks they might've already waited for him downstairs. But then he remembers that he, too, has to get up to work for a little bit this morning, since Boss had asked him to, yesterday. With a dejected sigh, he steels himself to wake up fully.
He yawns and stretches before sitting up, only to feel his phone buzzes beside his leg. Without looking at the name of the caller, he picks up, murmuring out a meek, "Hello?"
"Oh, uh… hello, Senpai!" Rings out Yoshizawa's cheerful voice. He wakes up a bit more, his hand palming the bedside table for his damnable not-really-functioning glasses. "…I'm sorry, did I wake you up?"
"Yep," He says flatly as he finally finds his accursed object and pushes it up his face. With another two seconds dedicate to blinking, he says, his voice a little clearer. "But it's okay, I've gotta be up now anyway. You wanna hang out with me or something?"
He could hear the other splutters and stumbles on her own words, and it takes everything in him to resist teasing his Kouhai. "Um! I mean, we did kind of talk about that before? But it's been a while, and I hadn't put too much intent behind my words so—"
Ren laughs. "No need to get so flustered, Yoshizawa. But I, Goro and Mochizuki plan on visiting Meiji Shrine this morning, so you'll have to deal with a murderous bird and an overexcited, hyperactive goof of a man, if you wanna join us."
She giggles. "It actually sounds nice! I'll meet you at the station, then?"
"Yeah, I'll meet you there in a bit, so you don't have to hurry, m'kay?"
"Okay! See you there, Amamiya-senpai!"
After that, he makes himself presentable (shower during this freaking weather is for the bold, and he isn't going to be one today) before coming down, only to be greeted by Mochizuki and Goro, who has more or less taken a table next to the old couples for themselves, cups of coffees and empty plates on the table. He then spots a stranger he's never seen, who's chatting quite animatedly with Boss, before he bows his head a little and makes his way to the booth—
"Hey, you don't need to work today," Boss says, holding up a hand and stopping him from reaching the other side of the counter. When he tilts his head, the old man adds with a gentle smile. "You promised your friends to visit the Shrine, right? They've been waiting for you for an hour, now. Might as well go, and don't worry; I've got it from here."
"…You sure, Boss?" Ren asks. While he's pleasantly surprised and glad, he still feels responsible. "I mean, I did tell you I'll help—"
"This is a New Year, kid, don't argue with me," Sojirou says with a small smile, his eyes always so kind despite the initial coldness. "You can just help me once you're done celebrating."
"Alright, if you insist," Ren relents, bowing his head again. "Thanks, Boss."
"You really have to work on waking a little earlier, Ren," The stranger says with a laughter, his shoulders relaxed, his eyes glinting with amusement.
Ren blinks stupidly, and he turns to the other two, both of whom are giving him the I don't know him either look. So, he frowns a little, and weighs his words carefully. "Um… It's a pleasure making you acquaintance, sir…?"
The stranger snorts. "Funny, Ren. Very funny."
He just blinks stupidly before excusing himself and walking to the table, his eyes lingering at the stranger just a little longer. He then sits down beside Goro and points quite rudely. "Who's that?"
"I don't know, but he seems to be a regular," Goro muses, taking another sip. Mochizuki closes the small book (where the hell did you get that from, dude?) and puts in on the table before downing the last of the coffee. After a second, Goro continues, "You want to head out yet?"
"Sure," He nods. And then, his phone buzzes, so he looks down to see Yoshizawa texting him. "Oh. It seems like Yoshizawa's reached the Shrine faster than usual. Might as well go – it's rude to keep your Kouhai waiting, right?"
"Aren't you going to say anything about you leaving us waiting?" The detective bites back before he nudges Ren with his knee. He complies, and Goro gets up soon after, with Mochizuki right behind them.
Ren grins. "Never."
They step out, and the cool breeze of the first day of the year washes over him. He hums, tugging his hands inside his pockets as they leisurely make their ways towards the shrine.
Raoul stirs as he continues his walk, chatting and making jokes with the other two. The air seems light, carefree, kind, and luck has been on their sides, thus far; there aren't many people in the train, which arrives right after they step into the platform. The lights at the intersections are also very kind today; they all turn green whenever they reach the crossroads. Mochizuki makes a note about that, his eyes a little amused, and Ren has to agree – this is the best start of the year, as far as he could tell.
When they reach the Meiji Shrine, he spots Yoshizawa waving at them, she herself wearing a yellow kimono with red blossoms scattering across the silk. And as soon as they spot her, Mochizuki starts wearing his flirtatious mask and whistles, hands behind his head. "Oh my, she looks mighty fine."
"Hey, don't hit on her so brazenly," Ren says, punching the taller boy lightly on his flank, making the boy yelps and pulls away, laughing merrily. Then, once they reach her, Ren grins. "Happy New Year."
"Happy New Year, Amamiya-senpai!" She says enthusiastically, before withering a little under Goro's passive face. "…Happy New Year, Akechi-san."
"To you as well, Yoshizawa-san," He says with a small nod, his face filled with nothing but boredom. To be honest, Ren is already surprised that Goro would actually accompany him today, since the man is one of the most anti-social human being he's ever had the pleasure to know. After a moment, Ren follows his red eyes only to see Mochizuki rubbing his chin, looking thoughtful. "Mochizuki-san, you are not going to do something questionable, are you?"
"Mm? What do you mean, something questionable?" The boy repeats, genuinely confused, before he turns his gaze back towards Yoshizawa. And then, as if snapping out of his thoughts, he blinks and smiles charmingly at his Kouhai before bowing his head slightly. "I'm sorry, that was rude of me. Happy New Year, Yoshizawa-san."
"Um! Happy New Year as well, Mochizuki-senpai."
"Are we done with the pleasantries yet?" Goro mutters, giving Ren an annoyed look. "You know I'm not one for this kind of thing, Ren. Please hurry up and—"
"Nuh-uh!" Ren cuts him off, patting his back and waving at Yoshizawa to don't mind him. "We're not even halfway there yet, and you are so not refusing me. We are going to celebrate this together, and I'm not letting you quit until you're spent!"
Goro's face pales comically at that, and he scoots away, only for Ren to catch him by the sleeve. "Ren, good god, no—"
"Come on! Let's go!" He laughs and drags the boy towards the shrine, leaving the other two trailing right behind them.
…Something's wrong.
Something's very wrong.
After the others, who seems to be talking about things that shouldn't have been possible – Ryuji's track team, the stay of Suzui Shiho, Queen's father, Okumura, Isshiki Wakaba – have left, he promptly looks to Goro and Mochizuki for inputs, even as his scars scream for him to do something. And, as expected, he's met with nothing but dumbfounded looks and alarm in their eyes.
"…But it's only been a few hours since then," Mochizuki suddenly says, his eyes thoughtful, a finger on his lips as his gaze shifts to nowhere in particular. "I didn't detect any major changes in the air, either. How could things be like this so quickly?"
"An overnight change like this – and to change reality to such a degree," Goro says, eyeing Ren with a permanent scowl on his feature. He shifts his eyes towards Death a little before continuing, the sense of urgency lying in the undertone. "…I'm sorry, Mochizuki-san, but Yuuki-san's investigation will have to be put on hold, for now."
"I understand," The boy nods. "Even though I still want to continue, I simply can't ignore something like this. If reality is changed to this degree, what is to say that it won't become worse, or won't affect Makoto, as well? We have to find the cause of this first, and correct it."
"The app," Ren breathes, looking down at the strange grayed-out application on his phone. "That's our only lead. But—"
"—We have no targets," Goro finishes with a sigh as he taps at the app. "Yes, that's our one major roadblock. We do have a search history, but with the name crossed out, so we should be able to enter their Palace… if what's causing this is a human, and if we know where."
Ren crosses his arms before he recalls something that he saw this morning – a dream. The school, the voices telling him he's not accepted this yet, the blue butterfly— "…The Velvet Room."
"…What?"
"Come on, let's go," Ren says, grabbing both of their wrists and dragging them with him. "I dunno, but I dreamt of something this morning. I'm not going to bore you with the details, but I supposed… the Velvet Room residents would know something about any of this."
Goro seems to ponder a little at that, and he nods. "It's our only lead so far. Might as well."
Their walk to the Velvet Room (his Velvet Room) is hurried, and silent. Mochizuki seems perturbed by all of this, and rightfully so – for someone with deep ties towards Metaverse and Shadows and the Sea of Souls, for the change in the fabric of reality itself to happen right under his nose is something that should not have been possible. Hell, he could even tell that Yaldabaoth – something vile – was at the heart of the Mementos, back then. Even with his power still not in full, he should've been able to notice strange happenstances of this magnitude.
And Goro – the always careful, always thinking Goro, whose ties to the darker side of a person's psyche are much stronger than Ren's – expresses his concern in the fact that the things that are happening aren't necessarily a bad thing; all the things that has been changed, has somehow been changed for the better. Resurrections of the people who do not deserve death, the change in their personalities that allow them to be the selves that they've always wished for, like Futaba's more outgoing nature – all of those things are not bad, but to change someone without their own knowledge, that's what bugging Goro most.
And Ren agrees; while he realizes that the circumstances are actually pretty ideal, there is no denying the facts that all of these changes are not the results of one's free will, and he – the rebel, the thief, who values freedom of choices above all else – does not like the implications of these events. Without free wills, people cannot evolve; they cannot change for the better, they cannot strive towards their ideals, they cannot fight against their own darkness.
People simply do not evolve without tackling their own darkness and fears, and while those processes might take months, years, decades – or god forbids, even a lifetime – it is a universal fact that lives are made out of the trials and choices that one will inevitably have to face and make.
He cannot allow this to continue, even if it hurts – because what is life, without freedom?
And, to be fair… he hasn't expected this.
"What's wrong, Ren?" Goro asks when he stops in the same alleyway he has visited times and times before, for the services of the Velvet Room, for bringing forth the masks that dwells within the Sea of Souls. "Where are you looking—"
"It's not here," He breathes, Goro's words falling on deaf ear, his eyes wide. He's looking at the same damn spot, he's sure – the same knocked-over trash can, which has never once been set upright, the same damn sign with a missing letter and flickering light. Everything is the same, except for one glaring fact that the blue cell door, the door he'd often used to access the place between dreams and reality, mind and matter, is not here. "The Velvet Room isn't here."
It's gone. The Velvet Room is gone—
"It hasn't disappeared," Mochizuki says, making Ren looks back. Death is having his eyes closed, brows slightly scrunched in concentration. "…It just changed its entrance, that's all. Possibly to avoid detection, or because the change in reality shifts its placement."
"Do you know where it is?" Ren asks, forcibly swallowing back the wad of air bubbling up his throat. "Igor and Lavenza might know what happened. I have to talk to them."
A moment, and Mochizuki nods. "…Yes, I think I can find it. And… this is a bit concerning, but…"
Instead of continuing with words, Mochizuki lifts his hands up for them to see. And after a single inhalation of frigid, unbreathable air, his fingers are enveloped with darkness.
Goro gasps. "…You can use your power in the real world?"
"I could do it before I went back to the Sea of Souls the first time," He says quietly as he pulls his hand back, tugging it inside his pants pocket. "I shouldn't be able to do it now, not without Makoto by my side. If I can, it would mean that—"
"—Much like when Yaldabaoth tried to fuse the two worlds together, the Metaverse and the real world are merging," Ren finishes, the true weight of the situation sinking deep into his bones. "Fuck."
"No point wallowing in it just yet," Goro quickly says, patting Ren's back twice. When he turns to look at him, Goro is giving him a firm, unyielding look. "You have a plan. We'll follow. Mochizuki-san, please lead us to the Velvet Room's entrance?"
"Yes," The boy nods and quickly turns on his heels, leading their ways forward.
When Mochizuki is three steps ahead, Goro puts a firm hand on his shoulder, and he sees those striking red eyes boring into him. Goro then says with an almost imperceptible smile, that of confidence and defiance. "You'll be fine, Ren. All of us will. We're not alone."
He laughs a little at that. "Yeah."
That's right. They have each other – they'll find a way.
The door to the Velvet Room ended up in the alleyway right outside of school.
Thankfully, the alley's traffic is minimum at best, due to the alley itself being a dead end. Ren knows he couldn't bring the other two with him, so he asks for them to wait as he steps into the Velvet Room.
He opens his eyes to the same prison, with its cold, hard bed and steel bars and leaking pipes. He looks down, and is mildly surprised to see that he is no longer a prisoner, with his clothing remaining just as he's entered this place. He gets up fully, eyes darting around, and smiles when he spots two familiar faces in the dead center of the hall.
He steps through the door, and Igor greets him, his everlasting grin still as unsettling as ever, although less sinister than when Yaldabaoth wears it. "Welcome to the Velvet Room, my dear guest."
"…Oh! I'm here, too?"
Ren whips around and almost sprains his neck at the voice, only to see Mochizuki there, his arms crossed, a pleasant smile on his face. Ren turns his questioning look towards Igor, who nods in Death's way. "I am pleased to meet you again, Ryoji-san. It is fortuitous that I can call you into this place along with Ren-san, and that is in no small part due to the strange occurrence in the real world."
"So you know something's up," Ren says, turning to Igor and his warden – no, his attendant – fully. Lavenza gives him a small nod, so he returns that with one of his own before continuing. "What happened?"
"I do not rightly know, but it is similar to something that happened during Christmas Eve," The old man states, waving his hand slightly. "Someone is actualizing their dreams, injecting their worlds into reality, changing it. The power of actualization, that is only possible through channeling the power the God of Control left behind."
"…Someone," Ren repeats slowly. "So, this is a doing of a human."
Just as we've suspected.
"Yes, as unlikely as it is," Another voice says, and Ren looks behind Igor to see a woman with short silver hair and piercing golden eyes, adorning a small blue hat and sleeveless blue dress. He hears Mochizuki laughs a little at her appearance. The newcomer then bows. "I hope I am not too late, Master."
"You are not," Igor confirms, and upon Ren's confused look, waves towards the woman. "This here is another of the Velvet Room's resident, who has just returned from her journey across your world. Her name is Elizabeth, Makoto-san's retainer."
Ren looks at Mochizuki at this, and the boy nods. "She and Igor were the ones who helped Makoto during his own Fool's Journey. You can trust her."
"Ah," Ren mutters. "Um, Amamiya Ren. Nice to meet you."
"The pleasure is all mine."
"Sister, please do not steal my guest," Lavenza says flatly, causing Ren to jump under his skin. She's smiling at him, but… it's a bit murderous, he thinks? "But, back to our original topic, Trickster. We, sadly, do not know who it is that is tampering with your world. We apologize for that."
"It can't be helped, then," Ren says, rubbing his chin. "Anywhere we can look?"
"There is a strong change in the fabric of reality at the place you humans called Odaiba Stadium, or rather, its construction site," Elizabeth says, opening the tome in her hand and calling out a single Arcana card. "But even I am not certain as to what or how you will be able to investigate this further."
"That's plenty," Ren says, lifting a hand. "At least we've got something to work with."
"I agree," Mochizuki hums, glancing at Ren briefly before redirecting his gaze to Yuuki's attendant, the eccentric woman. "Elizabeth-san, since you're here, now… can you find him? Or is there any clue I can work with, at all?"
"Sadly, I cannot," Elizabeth says with a shake of her head. "What or whoever took him, they have hidden themselves very well. But one thing is unquestionable."
"What thing?" Mochizuki half-growls, and seems to remember himself seconds later, as he then wears an apologetic look and looks away.
Elizabeth snaps the tome shut, shattering the Arcana card within it. "That Makoto-san had come into contact with someone that I am certain also bears the power to call forth Persona. At least one of them, who is holding him under captivity, is—"
"—A Persona User…?" Mochizuki says, and at this, Ren could feel his life being too close to danger, chill of dread and fear crawling up his spine and settling at the nape of his neck, ready to force him to turn tail and run. He tries to force himself to look at Death, whose expression seems calm, but the deep, freezing anger is just palpable in the air. "…They're not someone I know, are they?"
"I don't think so," Lavenza answers, this time. "I and Sister could sometime see into the world, and while your friend remains hidden from our eyes, due to some circumstances I am not quite sure what, we could still see the rest – your friends are doing quite well, and are all fighting to uphold their ideals, just as they have before... at least, they were, before reality is changed, that is."
Mochizuki sighs a little at that, the seeping anger and the squared shoulders gone. "…That's good, at least. But as long as there's no new clue to work with, I cannot find him. Please tell me anything, anything at all, should something come up to you."
"We will, Ryoji-san," Igor says before directing his attention to Ren once more. "Trickster, the change in reality at this time might benefit you and your friends in the short run, but—"
"Without freedom, there's no life," Ren cuts him off, and Raoul hums in agreement, proud. He smiles at his attendant, who seems relieved upon his declaration. "If we can't face the truth and live in a beautiful lie, it would mean that we're not truly living our lives, right? I know that much. To live, is to live and learn through your own choices. Without the ability to choose, humans would become nothing. I will not allow a god or a man to dictate my path, not now, not ever."
"You truly are the greatest man I know, Trickster," Lavenza hums with a small smile. "Then, please return to your world, and proceed with caution. Should I know anything more, you will be the first to know."
"I'll hold you onto that," Ren says with a grin.
And now… they have a mystery to solve.
The three of them decide to head for the construction site first thing afterwards.
Goro seems a little peeved that he's barred from the Velvet Room, but since Mochizuki's special in ways no human can hope to replicate, he has no choice but to accept it and let it slide. And to think that the person (people?) holding Yuuki captive is a Persona User – that just complicate things to no end, not to mention explain their knowledges about Personas and Persona Suppressors.
Mochizuki said that he'd be fine, and rechecked Yuuki right after only to find that he could feel just the same – pain and discomfort, but no more information pertaining his whereabouts or his physical states. Ren sighs; he sure hopes they'd be able to do more. Both matters require their immediate attentions, and both are equally life-threatening, in their own ways – one threatens to strip them of their freedoms, the other to torture and possibly kill a person.
Once they step foot along the path to the station, Goro speaks up. "…Something doesn't fit."
"What thing?" Ren asks.
"Why aren't the three of us affected?" He says, and further elaborates after Ren nods. "Everyone – not just the Thieves, but the general populaces – seems to be having the perfect lives. But we still remember the real reality. And Yuuki-san, too, from Mochizuki-san's words – his circumstances never change. Isn't that right, Mochizuki-san?"
"…Yes," He confirms with a nod, his sapphire blue eyes glancing towards their destination. "It is strange, when you think about it. And you can't say it's because we're satisfied with our current situations, either."
"Maybe because our wills are too strong to be swayed," Ren reasons. "Not that our friends are weak-willed or anything, but I suppose deep down, they all wish for things to be different. I did, too, but I just accepted it and headed towards the future without looking back. The same goes for you, Goro."
"That… is certainly true," Goro nods. "What about Yuuki-san?"
"Makoto is strong," Mochizuki says with a proud smile. "He even chose an eternity of nothingness and possible madness over letting the world die. He didn't choose the easy way out by killing me. He chose to forgive me and everything, so I think there's no doubt about it. But if his status isn't changing, that would mean his current state is ideal to someone. And that's making me sick."
"You can't please everyone, is what people say all the time," Ren muses, fingers clawing at the scar on his chest until he could feel the sting as they bleed. "Well, whatever or whoever it is, or what their reasons are, we need to stop them."
"My sentiment exactly," Goro says as they reach the construction site.
Much to Ren's chagrin, there is seemingly nothing wrong here – all he could see are the aluminum walls and the materials and the workers' hats left lying around, since it's already sunset when they arrive. He sighs and fishes for his phone. Luckily enough, the app is here.
He vaguely remembers this place to be where he met Yoshizawa, having stumble upon a Palace that he knows not whom it belongs to. And to think that such a place where he met her by chance might be the source of the disruption in reality – he couldn't rightly explain why, but his gut is twisting and churning, making him sick. His instinct is whispering, that it's someone he knows.
"Check the search history, then?" Goro suggests, eyeing his own phone. "Maybe—"
"Amamiya-senpai!"
They turn to see Yoshizawa running towards them. Mochizuki does seem a little alarmed, but Ren raises a hand before turning his attention back to her. "Yoshizawa. A surprise seeing you here. Don't you have your New Year Party to attend to, though?"
"I did, but… I don't know, I just want to come here, for some reason."
"How very odd," Goro says with his voice betraying none of his distrust. Ren understands that, but Yoshizawa – back then, as a Persona User – helped him escapes from Niijima Sae's casino, after all. And when Goro catches his pleading look, he finally relents and lifts his ever-scrutinizing gaze off of the poor girl. "But, very well. Just don't weigh us down."
"Goro, don't be mean," Ren chides, hitting his shoulder a bit harder than intended, causing Goro to yelp out his protest and backs away.
"Ow!"
"Sorry not sorry," He says flatly, his fingers hovering over the damnable app. "So, you guys ready?"
"Um! Ready for what?" Yoshizawa asks.
Ren smacks himself mentally, having forgotten the fact that he hasn't told the girl anything yet. He gives her a quick rundown, and she seems like she doesn't believe him. So he adds, with exasperation behind his tone. "I know it sounds really wild, but I don't think it's far-fetched. I mean, aren't talking cat-monster and people calling forth some mythological bullshits by ripping their faces off more surreal?"
"…That is true," Yoshizawa relents. "Then yes, I am ready. If it is as you say, then I don't think leaving it any longer will be wise for us."
She then looks towards Mochizuki, who only smiles. "Let's just say that I am a Persona, of a kind. I am different from you, but let's leave that for another day. Time's wasting."
"On that, we can agree," Goro says. "Let's go, Joker."
The place seems different. Feels different. More powerful. More hostile.
Raoul is uneasy in his chest, his scars tingling almost uncontrollably, mimicking Mochizuki's increasing unrest. He doesn't like the way the two feel and look, but he has to keep his feelings in check as they battle their ways through this laboratory, of sort, infested with Shadows more powerful than any of the minions he's ever faced before.
And the damn place is filled to the brim with them.
After he hacks the last Shadow to bits, he puts up a finger, panting slightly. "Timeout! Timeout! Fuck, it's only been five days. I'm outta practice."
"It's not just you, though," Crow says, his hands on his hips, face tipping upward, panting. Ren spies Yoshizawa trying to catch her breath not far from him. As always, Death is the one and only person (thing?) that doesn't seem to be affected by the concept of exhaustion. "They're stronger than I thought they would be. I wonder why."
"I have a few theories, but this is no such place to discuss it," Thanatos says, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms. "After you get your bearings, let us find a place to rest, first of all. Fighting our way through with this much enthusiasm will do us no good in the long run."
"I agree," Crow hums. He then pauses, before looking at Yoshizawa, who's staring at him intensely. "…Do you wish to say something to me, Yoshizawa-san?"
"Um! Nothing!" She says, quickly turning away, her cheeks turn rosy pink.
"You're thinking along the line of – has he always been this sort of a ruthless, sadistic person? – isn't that right?" Ren teases, and laughs when he makes her jump. Crow throws him a dirty look, while Yoshizawa flusters and fails miserably at hiding her blush. "I mean, he's always been this way. Just everyday Goro. Don't mind him."
"Joker, one of these days, I swear to god I'm going to kick you in the behind and send you into the next week with a broken coccyx," Crow growls, the red eyes of his mask glinting.
"Oh, spank me, daddy," Ren teases as he gets up straight. He hears some sort of choking noise from Crow, but decides to ignore it as he brandishes his blade again. "Alright, I'm set. You three ready?"
Yoshizawa and Thanatos readily reply, but he notes the absence of the sarcastic murder-bird's voice, so he turns to see Crow turning away from him, a hand over his mouth, coughing. When Ren tilts his head, the man just lifts up a finger before inhaling sharply twice. Then, a bit hoarsely, he mutters, "…Okay, I'm good. Let's find a safe room first."
Kinda weird, but Ren decides to prioritize finding a safe room first and foremost.
It takes them a long while (maybe an hour, he guesstimates), but they finally find themselves a safe room right before an elevator. He lets Crow explains how the safe room comes to be to Yoshizawa as he sits down on the small white chair, letting his body have its much-needed rest. Thanatos sits to his right, tendrils of darkness recalled back into his soul, his eyes curiously take in the state of the room.
"Oh yeah, this is your first time in a safe room, right?" Ren says, pushing his mask off his eyes and fishing out a bar of Snickers from his coat. He throws one each to his friends before munching on his own. When Thanatos nods, he waves his hand around. "Pretty handy place. Let us catch our breaths and prepare for whatever else that's going to come with it."
"A gap in a person's cognition, huh…" He murmurs, the chocolate bar lies forgotten in his palm. His blue eyes shift around again, this time slower, more thoughts behind his gaze. "Even if I've been in one a few times, I still couldn't quite get used to it. Such an amazing place. The Dark Hour had no such thing as a safe place for you, because it didn't come to be from just cognition of the masses alone, but of that in combination with Nyx's own power."
"Sounds like a hard time to be alive and awake in," Ren says, his mind recalling Thanatos' tales of the SEES and their battles with Death itself. At this, he sees the other two paying a bit more attention to them than he thinks they would, so he just gives them a small smile. "So, Than… what do you think of this place?"
He chews on the insides of his cheeks a little, his head tilted in deep contemplation, before he hums out, his voice low, his speech slowed. "…I think I can understand the Palace's Ruler a little better. He is just like me, back then, when I offered the SEES a choice to kill me in order to forget it all."
"…SEES? Choice to kill you?" Yoshizawa asks.
Ren briefly smacks himself – he totally forgets that she knows nothing about this. He glances at Crow, who promptly says, "It's a long story, Yoshizawa-san. We'll get there another time."
"Oh."
"…Aside from that," Ren says, turning his eyes back to Death, who's looking down at his own hands, his fingers restless. "Why do you think so?"
"This person wants what he thinks is the best for the people – for me, for you, for your friends – much like how I was. I used to think that Death cannot be defied, so I gave them, I pleaded for them, to kill me, so that they'd be able to live their final days in peace. What I didn't know at the time is that the human wills are strong – enough to change their own futures."
He lets the words sink in, and smiles – that is the Thieves' code of conduct, after all. To rebel against the forces that thought themselves absolute and unchangeable, and prove them wrong. He then pats Thanatos' shoulder lightly, and when the boy's blue eyes turn to him, he grins. "And now that you know, you're fighting to keep our freedom of choices safe. I've said this before, but thanks, for standing with us, even with your own quest unresolved."
"His wills are my own. We share them," He says with a light smile. "It is what he would've done. And this is what friends do for each other, no?"
He laughs. "That's true."
"We should keep moving," Crow interjects. "We should be all rested up now. Unless you want to spend more time chatting up nonsense?"
"Crow, be nice," Ren chides lightly as he gets up. Thanatos does the same.
Crow snorts, but then the tenseness leaves his body for a split second, and he puts a hand forward towards Thanatos. When the latter gives Crow a questioning look, the murder-bird says, "I said I hadn't trusted you yet. But from what you've done for us, and from all the things you've told us; nothing but the truth, even though it would put your position in jeopardy, even though it would mean risking us turning our backs on you… I think I can safely say, now, that you've earned my trust, Mochizuki Ryoji-san."
…Ren didn't see that coming. Crow doesn't trust people easily, and he still has doubts sometimes that the boy trusts him, even after he's declared his friendship towards Ren. But then, Ren smiles – this is just another proof that Crow's changing for the better. Or rather, that's he's opening up his true heart more.
And Thanatos takes that hand and shakes it firmly. "Thank you, Akechi-san. You've done much for me as well. I'll not let you down."
"Well then!" Ren says, clapping his hands lightly. "I'm glad you've got that sorted out. Now then, lady and gents… we have a heart to change."
It's Yoshizawa Sumire, not Kasumi.
He knows why she's running away from the truth; because reality hurts. And he knows better than anyone, that Maruki Takuto means the best for them – hell, Ren's pretty sure most, if not all, of the Thieves had come out of their therapy sessions with him better and lighter, Ren himself included. But to think that Maruki would be warped enough, and to disregard freedom just enough, to actually manifest a Palace of his own, and for his desires to be so powerful that he'd take Yaldabaoth's place and powers.
Thanatos isn't doing – or saying – anything, and his eyes convey everything Ren needs to know; he thinks Ren should sort this out first, because Thanatos values their friendships enough that he understands the necessity for him to try to talk this out with Maruki on his own.
"Change it back," Ren says, trying to keep his voice leveled, his heart calm. His fingers twitch again, and he has to put a part of him to stop himself from reaching for the scars. To change reality so drastically, to alter the fabric of space and time so absolutely, means that he's going to shackle everyone to his own will, because allowing them to think freely will make his reality as warped as the real one. "Maruki-san, you have to change it back—"
Then he stops himself, glancing to the kneeling, crying Yoshizawa. A fragile, broken girl, wrecked with guilt of causing the death of her own sister. Ren couldn't claim he understands that, because he doesn't. But what he knows (he thinks he knows) is that without facing your own pain, you can't move forward. He should be steady in his ideals, he should not back down, and yet—
—And yet, he finds himself hesitating.
Luckily for him, Crow steps in, practically growing under his breath. "I've had enough of your high-and-mighty attitude. All you did was using her to validate your ideas, that is all. You have not a clue about what the world, what humans are. And you claim you're saving everyone? You haven't. All you are doing, here and now, is running away."
"…It is unfortunate, that you see things like that," Maruki says, clearly and genuinely saddened. Ren gulps, but finds himself having not enough resolve to say anything, even though he was just so steadfast and so unbending before coming fact-to-face with this man. "But, can't you see? My research will turn the people's wishes into reality. No one will have to suffer under this unfair world, ever again!"
He just couldn't say anything.
And with his refusal to acknowledge Maruki's reality (it's wrong, and yet—), nor to reject it outright, the man forcibly takes Yoshizawa into his own care, and just disappears.
But not after telling them to see his self-made reality, first.
Ren's still in a dazed, uncertain. He knows he values freedom more than anyone. He should be valuing it more than this absurd reality, and yet—
"You're hesitating."
There's no bite, no malice. Just pure, simple truth carved into his soul with Goro's firm words. He dares not looking up, but he nods, biting his lower lip a little as to stop his mind from wandering off, nails digging deep into his own arms. "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't, but… I know how cruel reality can be. I don't like us not having a freedom of choice, but is it wrong—"
"To live, is to die."
They both turns towards Mochizuki, who has remained on the sidelines, all this time, except for that last battle with Maruki's lackey in their attempts to get Yoshizawa back. When the silence stretches, Ren decides to ask, his voice scratchy. "…What do you mean?"
"To live is to die, to bond, to connect. To live, is to experience both joy and sorrow, both happiness and pain. Because without one, the other cannot exist," Mochizuki says with a small smile. He sees Goro nods a little at that before looking back down at Ren, his gloved hand careful on his shoulder. "Amamiya, I know how this seems to you. I've told you before, yes? That I was just the same as that man – I used to think that I know best how to help humans."
He nods, trying to focus himself on what Mochizuki had said before – that he was proven wrong before, when the SEES refused him and won. That humans can change and grow. And what he's just said, too—
"It's normal to feel conflicted. At least, for someone like you," Goro says. When Ren looks at him in the eyes, this time, those orbs of scarlet are unusually kind. "But what Mochizuki-san said is the truth. And I think I know you enough, that this is just a temporary moment of weakness. You know, better than any of us, that—"
"—Without freedom, there's no life," He murmurs, smiling slightly, his eyes shifting towards the dark sky, towards the scattering starlight. "…Yeah. It's not wrong to wish for a world where no one suffers, but that isn't how humans should live. By facing hardships, we grow."
"Not to mention that Maruki-san is just that – a human. A mortal," Goro says. "He's just running away from the truth."
"There's something I also want to say to him, but let's save that for another time," Mochizuki says, his smile so warm, so kind. "Before we do anything else, let's see his reality, first hand. But I know you're not going to hesitate anymore, are you?"
"No," He says resolutely.
Because while reality is cruel, while life is unfair… they can be kind in its stead.
Their lives should be theirs to live, not dictated by someone else, no matter how well they mean.
A man – a god – should have no say over their paths forward.
No more. Not again.
See you next chapter!