Oh my God, this one's a doozy. It's 10,000+ words long, meaning that it's not only the longest chapter of Otherside thus far by a wide margin, it's also the longest chapter I have EVER written, by a much narrower margin. And yet, I greatly enjoyed writing it as well.
Feel free to read this one in chunks if you need to, because it is really long. I just ask that you leave a review at the end, because if you all can't find ANYTHING to say about it, then that's on me. Thank you all for supporting the story so far; it means the world, indeed the universe, to me. Having 20 favorites now and 32 followers is just the icing on the cake.
Here we go: Ten thousand words of Amanda's perspective. Did you guys ask for it? Well, maybe not, but that's what you're getting!
AMANDA MARINER, 20* - PAST TENSE
My name is Amanda Mariner. I'm twenty years old, what you might call a socialite. Despite this, I try to be as selfless as possible, if all my blood donations and volunteer hours count for something.
The last thing I remember is...wait a minute? Wasn't I on a waterfall, rappelling downward? And now I'm...here. Wherever "here" is.
Amanda opened her eyes to find herself in a nondescript room with an assortment of identical chairs along the wall, one of which she was sitting in. There were no paintings on the walls; in fact, there was nothing but a door on the other side of the room.
This door had a plaque on it that labelled it as the office of Professor Samuel Oak, who was apparently also a Judge.
Professor Oak? I feel like I've heard that name before, but it must have been a long time ago. Maybe he's from one of the video games my friends played in high school?
As it would turn out, her guess wasn't half bad.
Amanda continued to try and figure out how she'd gotten here. She was fairly certain that she'd been descending down a waterfall on a rope, on a family vacation somewhere tropical, when the rope snapped and she'd fallen.
If she had survived that at all, though, shouldn't she be in a hospital right now? Certainly she wouldn't expect to be in what looked like an average waiting room.
"Amanda Mariner, you may now enter the office of Professor Samuel Oak. It is time for you to be judged."
She knew enough about afterlife stories, even if she didn't believe any of them, to know that in many of them, your soul was weighed, or your life was judged, by some deity. This deity would determine if your life had been sufficiently virtuous to allow you passage into heaven.
I must be dead.
This didn't feel like a dying dream, though; the sound of her footsteps sounded very real indeed as she entered the office, which held several items on the walls.
In addition, the office contained a desk with two chairs, one on either side. Amanda took a seat in the unoccupied chair and looked directly at the man across from her.
He was a short, rather buff man who may have been roughly her father's age. His hair was rather spiky, a white-blonde color often associated with wealth.
Also on the desk was a small spherical device roughly nine inches in diameter. Half was red, the other half white, and there was a small button in the middle. That device also looked familiar, but much like the name on the plaque, Amanda couldn't place it.
"Welcome to my office, Amanda Mariner. I am Professor Samuel Oak, a judge on the High Court in the realm of the afterlife."
What struck Amanda was how casually this man said those words. He knew her first and last names. He also claimed this to be the afterlife, throwing that information out so casually, like it was nothing.
"What's going on?" the young woman asked, trying to be polite and hoping she didn't fail miserably. "Am I...dead?"
The word dead hurt to say. She'd only been twenty, and had so much life left to live. So many dinner parties to attend. So many vacations to take, so many people to meet, so many hours to spend volunteering for the food pantry or Red Cross.
She couldn't be dead. She shouldn't be dead, for it just wasn't fair. Early death wasn't supposed to happen to anyone.
The universe is under no obligation to make sense to us. That was a quote she remembered vaguely, but she couldn't remember where it was from.
"Yes, you are" Professor Oak replied solemnly, lowering his head so that his eyes faced the floor. "Died while canyoning in the Caribbean. Rope snapped, freak accident...I'm very sorry."
"If I'm dead, then how am I talking to you?" Amanda blurted out.
The professor's solemn expression turned into a much cheerier one. "That's where I come in. You see, contrary to what many people believe in your world, the afterlife does exist."
"Cool, so which afterlife are we talking about? I thought Pascal really made a mistake when he excluded all the other conceptions of-".
Professor Oak shook his head. "None of them, Amanda. To my knowledge, which is much greater than that of Earthly researchers, there's currently no religion in your world that teaches the correct version of the hereafter."
It was then that everything clicked for Amanda. It was rather like a sliding puzzle, where with each move, the whole picture came together a little better.
The professor's name. The red-and-white ball on the desk. And the clarification that this wasn't an afterlife world people on Earth believed in. Put together, this led her to the conclusion that…
"This is the Pokemon world?"
Professor Oak frowned at her. "Ah, yes, you've figured it out. I'm the same Professor Oak from those blasphemous games and television series."
Judging by the choice of wording, Amanda gathered that the Pokemon multimedia franchise was a sore subject for the professor. She chose to steer the conversation away from these rough waters.
"So, am I in the good place or the bad place?"
The professor beamed at her. "Well, I have good news in that regard, Amanda. Based on an analysis of your life, it has been determined that your life was a net positive for Earthly society. As a result, you have been accepted into Paradise Island."
Paradise Island. If it's anything like that all-inclusive resort in the Bahamas, then it's not really paradise, is it?
Something told Amanda that she probably wasn't in the Caribbean anymore. Drawing on her memories of the Pokemon games (which were admittedly quite limited), she asked, "What region is this Paradise Island in? Kanto? Johto? Hoenn?"
The professor shook his head again. "It is good to see that you know some things about this world. However, you aren't in any of those regions; you are in Alola at present. It's a tropical archipelago, much like what you people called...uh, were those islands called?"
"Hawaii?"
"Yes, Hawaii. At any rate, what happened on Earth, stays on Earth. You should be quite proud of yourself for achieving paradise; it is a rather sad truth, but many people simply aren't good enough."
After a few moments of silence, the professor continued speaking.
"I would like to get you settled into your new home as quickly as possible, but first, there is one matter to attend to. You'll need to fill out a housing form, which will be processed by our computers. You will be paired up with a soulmate."
The professor had been speaking quickly, and it took Amanda some time to process what he was saying. Eventually, she responded, "Soulmate?"
"Yes, a soulmate. Defined by the dictionary as, a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner. Our algorithm will find the perfect person for you."
Amanda hated to disrespect this man who was promising her paradise, but she couldn't help but wonder something. She asked the question that had been placed in her mind.
"What if he's not the perfect person for me?"
Professor Oak laughed loudly and abundantly. When he had recovered from his laughing fit, he replied with, "He will be. The algorithm doesn't make mistakes."
With that, the professor handed Amanda a sheet of paper with eight printed questions on it. He instructed the young woman to answer every question honestly, and stressed that this was of the utmost importance.
Her hands shaking with nerves, she wrote down formal-sounding answers to all eight questions. When she'd finished filling out the form, Amanda put the pencil down and sighed with relief. It gave her a certain level of peace to know that she'd done the hard part already. She had made her bed and would have to lie in it.
"Thank you for answering the questions, Amanda Mariner. Now, my assistant, Lauren, will show you to your new home as soon as your application has been processed. This will take...oh, roughly not very long."
After placing the form in what looked like a scanning machine, Professor Oak snapped his fingers. Out of nowhere appeared a woman who looked to be in her late twenties or early thirties, but could have been considerably older and just applied a large amount of Botox. Her long, flowing brown hair, similar to Amanda's own hair, looked very artificial.
"Hi, I'm Lauren!" the woman exclaimed, giving a Cheshire grin. Her teeth were unnaturally white.
"Uh...hello, Lauren," Amanda replied. "You said you would take me to my new home?"
"That's right! Once you're assigned a dwelling here on Paradise Island, I will show you the way through the capital city of Enil Edam and to said dwelling. And if there's ever anything you need in your afterlife, you can always call on me."
Just then, there was a pinging noise, and Professor Oak turned to the two women. "Amanda Mariner, your application has been processed, and you have been assigned a home and soulmate. Welcome to Paradise Island."
Out of seemingly nothing, a majestic door appeared on the wall. Lauren smiled and said, "Right this way, Amanda. Your new address is 1109 Palm Drive."
How did she know that without reading the screen or whatever?
Nonetheless, the younger woman followed Lauren through the door and into bright midday sunlight.
"There are two things I'd like to tell you, Amanda," the office assistant said to the 20-year-old as the latter gaped in awe at the beauty of the city. "First of all, your presence, along with that of the other new residents, is required at Orientation this afternoon at five. There's no pressure, this isn't orientation for a job.
"Second of all, this may be paradise, but that doesn't mean you won't have demands on your time. You will have chores to complete, and you will find your assignments on Pillowtalk, the online network for Paradise Island. Do you understand both of those points?"
"Yes, Lauren," Amanda replied. "I do."
"Very well. Here is a map to your new home."
Lauren produced a scroll of parchment out of thin air and handed it to the younger woman. Amanda was about to thank her, but then the office assistant simply vanished, with no evidence remaining that she'd ever been there.
Amanda liked to think she was in pretty good shape, but the walk to Palm Drive had certainly been taxing. It didn't help that the map she'd been given wasn't terribly helpful.
By the time she reached the gravel road leading to a house by the ocean, she was panting from fatigue. Fortunately, the house she was looking directly at appeared to be the correct one, and it wasn't much further.
Moreover, the home itself was a three-story log cabin, which reminded her of "glamping" trips she'd taken with her family. The thought of family nearly brought tears to her eyes, but she forced those thoughts by the wayside. The less thought she gave her family, the less homesick she'd be. This strategy had worked for summer camp, for her elite boarding high school, and for the college she'd been attending prior to her death.
Amanda climbed the steps to the porch and knocked on the door until it was opened by someone she didn't recognize.
"Good afternoon" the young man said as he held out his right hand for her to shake.
Taking his hand in hers and shaking it, Amanda replied with, "It's nice to meet you."
The man who had welcomed her looked like a stereotypical college math nerd. He was probably about her age, with blue eyes, short brown hair, and an abundance of freckles all over his face, with a tiny bit of eczema to go along with it. He also wore glasses.
"What is your name, if you don't mind me asking?" Amanda asked the man.
"Kyle Jacobs," he told her. "I don't mind at all; why would asking my name be too personal? We are going to live with each other, after all."
"It's just polite to ask for permission before you ask something like that" she replied. "At least, it is where I'm from."
"Well...I guess it is nice to meet you too" Kyle responded, although as he shook her hand again, he looked in a different direction.
Amanda narrowed her right eye. "You're supposed to face the person you're shaking hands with. It's considered impolite not to."
"Sorry about that. I'm just...really not used to this. Yeah, that's it."
Kyle led Amanda inside the house, which was a lot nicer on the inside than it had looked on the outside. Despite being made out of wood, everything about it was pristine; there weren't even any pictures on the walls.
"This seems like a nice place to live," the young woman said. Then, resisting the urge to facepalm, she realized she'd forgotten something. "I never told you my name. I'm Amanda Mariner, twenty years old."
"Ah, nice. I'm twenty as well" Kyle responded blankly as he looked over at the TV dinner on the table. "I heated some food up if you want it."
Amanda couldn't help but scoff. "Kyle, that can barely be labelled as food. It's all artificial, live it up a little! You're in paradise!"
"I'll do what I want, because this is my afterlife," the young man replied, grabbing the plate off the table and sitting on the couch to eat it. He was watching what seemed to be a rerun of Big Mouth.
"Please, for the love of Arceus, don't eat on the couch" Amanda told Kyle. "Eat at the table with me instead; the furniture here is too nice to get dirty."
"Again, this is my afterlife. If you don't like it, you can leave, but finding a new soulmate is a long and arduous process for everyone involved. It's really a last-resort thing."
It had been in the back of her mind before, but it wasn't anymore: The person waiting for me at this address is supposed to be my soulmate. The algorithm paired me with Kyle Jacobs of all people?
Not more than two hours ago, Amanda had asked a question of Professor Oak, something along the lines of, "How will I know that the algorithm chose the correct person for me?"
The professor had, of course, dismissed her out of hand. The computer didn't lie, and it certainly didn't make mistakes.
Well then. I've got to play with the cards I was dealt, rather than the cards I wish I had.
Even though she liked to see herself as a prim and proper lady back on Earth, Amanda hadn't been above a round of poker every now and then. To use an analogy from that card game, she hadn't been dealt a royal flush, so she had to draw for an inside straight and hope she got the right card to complete it.
Anyway, Kyle began eating his TV dinner on the couch in front of Big Mouth, and Amanda noticed that his manners were atrocious. He brought his face down into the food like a pig would, and he occasionally picked up a dumpling with his fingers.
She couldn't stand to watch such a display of gluttony, so instead she tried to remember what Professor Oak and Lauren had told her about life on Paradise Island. She'd have chores to do, and today, there was going to be an Orientation at 5:00 PM. Taking a glance at the clock on the wall, that was a little over three hours away.
If I check that social network Lauren told me about...what was it called again? Pillowtalk? Oh yeah, that. Anyway, it should tell me what I have to do today. And if nothing else, it'll give me a distraction from Kyle's abominable table manners.
Amanda located the computer and turned it on. To her shock, there was only one app on it; no word processors, no Internet browsers, nothing but a logo of a smiling mustached man holding a pillow.
Surmising that this was the app known as Pillowtalk, the young woman clicked on it and, after some effort, found her name and photograph on the site.
Amanda Mariner. Died June 7, 2021. Cause of death: Fell from a great height while canyoning.
She already knew all of this, but saw that her page had a series of tabs, one of which was marked "Schedule." Clicking on this, she found that she had no commitments today other than to attend Orientation.
After exiting Pillowtalk and shutting the computer off (hey, it was important to save energy), she turned to her left and saw that the house was set next to a cliff overlooking the brilliant blue ocean. A number of pineapples were growing in a field on the cliff's edge, and the plants were gently moving in the slight afternoon breeze.
Even if my soulmate's not ideal, I have to admit that this location's pretty stellar.
Amanda returned to the living room, where Kyle had just finished his TV dinner. His face was covered in sauce, as were his fingers, and as he turned to face the young woman, he smiled.
"You shouldn't be proud of your manners, Kyle," his soulmate scolded him. "What will people think of you if you eat like a Pignite?" There, I used a Pokemon reference, since this is the world of Pokemon.
Kyle's smile turned upside down. "It's no big deal, is it? Nobody cares how I eat. For the millionth time, it's my afterlife, and I'll do things my way."
Amanda shook her head. "What if you go to a party? They'll expect you to be more polite than you've been with me."
"I don't go to parties. They really aren't my thing." Kyle stayed intensely focused on the TV screen, rather than looking her in the eyes.
The next few minutes, during which Amanda stood in the entrance to the living room and thought about her next move, were heavily awkward. Her soulmate didn't address her at all, instead occasionally laughing at the funniest scenes from his show.
Eventually, Amanda decided that she should figure out what room she'd sleep in, so she asked Kyle about this. She left out the fact that she wanted a place to be on her own for a bit.
Eh, he probably wouldn't be offended. Kyle doesn't seem to want to talk to me either.
"It's on the second floor. Your name should be on the door; mine was when I got here."
Amanda thanked him and made her way up to the second floor. She realized that she didn't have any belongings with her besides the clothes already on her body. This caused her some worry, but once she reached her room, much of said worry melted away.
In her bedroom, which looked rustic and yet extremely comfortable, there was a dresser filled with all the clothes she'd possessed back on Earth. Everything had been neatly folded into piles!
Maybe this place isn't so bad after all. Of course, there should be a higher standard for heaven than "not so bad", shouldn't there be?
Amanda sat down on her bed and sighed. The walls were lined with a large number of books, volumes of various sizes and colors. Scanning the shelves for a title that seemed interesting, she figured she'd have a lot of time for reading.
I'll literally have all the time in the world to read. Eternity is, in fact, a very long time.
She selected a title called Zoroark's Pendant, plucked it off the shelf, and began to read.
The book was fairly enjoyable, but Amanda kept an eye on the clock the entire time she was reading it. She couldn't engross herself too deeply in the story, because she didn't want to be late for Orientation.
I should probably allow myself at least ninety minutes to get to Orientation, so that I can walk without breaking much of a sweat, and also have time to search the capital for the event.
Amanda hadn't done much reading for the last few years, but she'd been something of a bookworm up until age fifteen or sixteen. As she read through Zoroark's Pendant, she wondered how she'd let herself get away from this hobby for so long, and felt herself revert to a state of almost childlike wonder.
I've got eternity to read this book. I've got eternity to pursue whatever passions I have. That is the best thing about the afterlife. And it's the worst thing about the afterlife.
Once she had returned from Orientation, Amanda entered a routine, as all people must do even in paradise. Some would have thought that heaven meant that one would be free from all the trappings of Earth; however, this was not the case.
That first evening, as she entered the house, she saw that Kyle was still on the couch binge-watching a certain animated sitcom. Judging by the glazed appearance of his eyes and the fact that he'd sunken into the couch, he might not have moved an inch in the last several hours.
"Good evening, Kyle" Amanda greeted him, trying to be proper. She was, however, exasperated when her soulmate didn't respond.
"Earth to Kyle, Earth to Kyle…".
"We're not on Earth, lady! We're on Paradise Island, planet Nexus!"
Amanda glared at Kyle. "It's a figure of speech. I just got back from Orientation; shouldn't you at least acknowledge me?"
"Come on, I was getting to the good part of Big Mouth!"
"That's no excuse" Amanda snapped, using a side of herself that rarely came out except when she was very angry. "Again, what will others think of you when you cut yourself off from the outside world like that?"
Kyle didn't respond after that; his eyes were completely superglued to the television. Amanda sighed and went back to the kitchen, where she scoured the fridge for something to eat for dinner. A long afternoon of preparation for her afterlife had sure made her hungry.
After dinner, she immediately retired to her bedroom, even though it wasn't even that dark yet. She continued reading her novel until her eyelids grew heavy and it got too tiring to make out the next sentence.
That was Amanda Mariner's first day on Paradise Island. Ironically, the last thought she had before drifting off was, They call this a paradise? Really?
In order to handle the reality that her soulmate wasn't exactly her idea of a perfect partner, she found herself trying to be engaged with the community as much as possible over the next few days. This of course started with her chores for the following week.
Her assignments included selling carpets at the Bikal Flea Market downtown, scooping frozen yogurt at Frozen Assets, kneading dough at Eatsa Pizza, and more. She tried to connect with her coworkers, but was shocked to discover that most of them were Pokemon.
One evening, having returned from her assignment at the pizza parlor, she asked Kyle about this. He was more attentive than he'd been the first day, an opportunity Amanda didn't want to waste.
"Oh, everyone here turns into Pokemon eventually. That's what Zapo at the orchard told me."
Two things about her soulmate's words struck Amanda. Firstly, the fact that Kyle was able to say them so nonchalantly, as though they didn't matter. Secondly, the actual meaning of those words.
"You don't just say that like it's nothing!" the young woman exclaimed. "That's a pretty big revelation, is it not?"
Kyle shrugged. "I guess so. But it's really not that big of a deal. You were going to find out anyway; better for it to be from me than from Professor Oak."
"Wait...what Pokemon are you going to become, Kyle?" Amanda asked her designated soulmate. She'd come to use designated as a qualifier, just for the sake of clarity; she didn't think Kyle would ever be her true eternal partner in afterlife.
"A Breloom" the young man responded, taking a sip of water from the glass on the counter. Seeing Amanda's face turn into a smile, Kyle started looking annoyed.
"What's so funny about that? That's what Professor Oak told me I was going to be!"
Amanda felt guilty about cracking up, but it was irresistible; it was the first time she'd laughed in days.
"It's just...I can barely imagine you as a Breloom! The idea of you with a mushroom-shaped head…". And then she trailed off, feeling as though she shouldn't have said that.
"Whatever" her designated soulmate told her, walking back over to the living room. "I'm gonna finish season four of Big Mouth, then do some reading before bed."
The young woman frowned as she resigned herself to yet another lonely evening meal, yet another dinner eaten without companionship. Back on Earth, she'd been to many dinner parties, so this was an unwelcome departure from that lifestyle.
Fortunately, the next day was Saturday, and while on the job with a Machamp named Maximus Waters that involved caring for the island's herd of golden Miltank, she received an offer she couldn't refuse.
"You can come to the party at my manor tonight, if you'd like" Maximus told her as he was cleaning up some of the Miltank's excrement. "I promise you, it's a lot more glamorous than this!"
Resisting the urge to hold her nose, Amanda laughed with relief. She'd gotten an invitation to a social function, something that was right in her wheelhouse! More importantly, it would provide an escape, if only for a few hours, from another lonely night with the man who felt more like a roommate than a soulmate.
She didn't even hesitate. "I'm in."
The party that evening was six hours of nearly absolute bliss. Amanda was able to forget about her life with Kyle on Palm Drive and instead indulge in glorious abundance. The Maximus Mansion, as it was called, was, without a question, the most grandiose estate she'd ever set foot on, and she had one of the best times of her entire existence on the dance floor.
For the first time since her arrival in heaven, it actually felt like heaven.
While sitting at dinner, digging into some of the most mouthwatering pulled pork she'd ever tasted (which was already one of her favorite dishes), the Ninetales sitting next to her caught her eye.
In between bites, Amanda introduced herself to the Ninetales, using the manners she'd been taught on Earth.
"It's nice to meet you, Amanda. My name's Raina, and my soulmate is also at this party."
The mere mention of soulmates made her want to break down and bawl until her mother came and comforted her. It wouldn't be proper for a woman her age and class, and wasn't even possible here, but that didn't make keeping a poker face any easier.
"Is something the matter, Amanda?" Raina asked her softly. "Please just tell me, it's fine!"
Amanda wasn't planning on divulging the truth about her partnership; or, at least, she hadn't been. But Raina seemed trustworthy enough, and besides, keeping emotions bottled up wasn't healthy.
"My soulmate is...well, let's just say he's not to my liking."
"Relationships aren't supposed to be perfect, Amanda" was Raina's immediate response. "Not everything has to be sunshine and roses; some amount of arguing is normal in a healthy relationship. It's how you deal with your disagreements that determines if it's healthy."
Amanda tried to weigh her response. Choosing her words more carefully this time, she said, "Well, I just don't think we're compatible. Kyle is always watching TV and never has time to just hang out with me. I feel like I barely know anything about him, and we've been living together for almost a week."
Fortunately, Raina was a good listener. "Go on," the Ninetales told the human.
"Well, I was promised by the professor that the system didn't make any mistakes, that this place was supposed to be perfect. If I can't even be happy with my designated soulmate, can it really be called paradise?"
Amanda didn't know what sort of answer she'd been expecting. Perhaps Raina would come up with some complicated way that a place could be simultaneously paradise and yet have some unwelcome elements, or else simply assert that it was paradise, without providing any good reason why.
Instead, however, the Ninetales hung her head down and sighed. When Raina spoke again, it was in a kind, gentle tone.
"You're not the only one in an unhappy relationship" she told Amanda.
"You?" the human female asked the Ninetales incredulously, almost unable to believe it. She tried to keep her voice down so that the other guests didn't hear her.
Raina gave her a sad nod. "My soulmate is...well, he likes to drink, let's just put it that way. He does it a lot, and not just casually. And it has put a strain on our relationship; he's not present the way I'd like him to be."
"It's the same with me and Kyle!" Amanda replied, immensely relieved that she wasn't the only one suffering here. "Well, he doesn't drink, at least not as far as I know. But he always seems distant, like I said; it feels like he doesn't consider me a priority."
"Of course, he could be preoccupied with something else" Raina said, doing whatever the Ninetales equivalent of shrugging was. "But if so, he should tell you that, and he needs to admit to himself that he's not in the right headspace to have a soulmate right now."
"But are you allowed breaks from your soulmate? Do separations even happen, not just divorces, for lack of a better word?"
The Ninetales shook her head. "You've got me there."
"What would happen if, hypothetically speaking, I decided that I couldn't stand to live with Kyle another day? Could I just leave?"
Raina shook her head again. "In order to leave a partnership, you need to have a valid reason, and having incompatible personalities, or whatever you might call it, isn't considered a valid reason in most cases. No matter what, it's quite a hassle, not something I'd wish on my worst enemy."
"But then you'd be free from a bad relationship. Have you tried separating from your designated soulmate?"
Raina seemed to consider the question for a moment, then replied in the negative.
"No. Believe me, I've considered it. But leaving is just so hard, and I've heard that bad things happen to those who do. Even if the Heaven Renders don't punish you for it, it's very much frowned upon here on Paradise Island."
"What bad things?" Amanda asked, her heart pounding and her stomach turning sour. Suddenly, the succulent pulled pork sandwich she'd had for dinner didn't taste so good.
"Again, Amanda, these are simply rumors. They haven't been confirmed by any objective source, and I'd hardly consider the word of our fellow islanders to be an objective source."
Just then, a Lucario came staggering into the gardens. He held his arms out like wings in order to steady himself, as though he'd just gotten off of a high-speed merry-go-round.
He waved at Raina with a look of recognition, even though he was clearly mired in a drunken stupor. The Ninetales, on the other hand, appeared repulsed to be in the Lucario's company.
"Amanda, meet Cyrus, my designated soulmate." Raina spoke that sentence in a sarcastic tone.
Wow. So Raina wasn't kidding about him being an alcoholic.
"How you doin', ladies? Wanna see my beach ball?" the Lucario slurred, nearly tripping over his own feet as he sat down next to the Ninetales.
Raina wrinkled her nose. "Is that some kind of innuendo? Either way, no thanks!"
The scene was almost comical, but it hit a little too close to home for Amanda. Still, she could see that some people (was Raina a person in addition to a Pokemon?) had it worse than her; better to be distant than to be drunk and distant.
Cyrus the Lucario began arguing with the Ninetales. What exactly they were arguing about, Amanda didn't know or care. All she really knew was that Cyrus was completely inebriated, unable to string a coherent sentence together.
She did cheer up somewhat when the chefs wheeled out the enormous cake, and her mouth began to water. It made her almost forget about what would be awaiting her when she returned to Palm Drive.
Is it going to be harder to live with Kyle now that I've experienced this? Oh my Arceus, I really hope this wasn't a mistake.
Nonetheless, Amanda tried to enjoy herself as much as possible. Even after the cake had been completely devoured by the dozens of guests, she remained on the dance floor for the next few hours as the band, whose members seemed to have an infinite amount of energy, kept on playing their music.
She only left the party when she absolutely had to.
A whole month passed. Part of Amanda felt like time had flown by, while another part was surprised that it had only been a month. Such was the reality of having an afterlife that you weren't really sure qualified as heaven.
The relationship between her and Kyle deteriorated further, if that were possible. Almost every day, they would have an argument about something or other. Every couple of days, she would consider trying to leave.
Almost all of the red flags of a bad (but not necessarily abusive) relationship were right in front of her. Had she noticed them in a friend's relationship on Earth, she would have urged them to get away and not look back. So what made this world different, since it was supposed to be paradise?
Mainly, it was the fact that leaving a soulmate partnership was so difficult here. The arduous process, to Amanda, seemed more difficult than remaining Kyle's designated soulmate. Of course, she was aware on some level that in the long run, leaving would be better than remaining as his roommate.
But then she remembered what Raina had told her. Supposedly, bad things happened to those who deserted their soulmates, and it might not be just the ire of her fellow afterlife citizens (which would have been bad enough.)
Although they didn't get along well, Amanda and Kyle had established one ritual as part of their "Roommate Agreement", so to speak: They would take turns cooking dinner. While this meant that they had TV dinners half the time, Amanda felt like it was worth it to see Kyle somewhat happy. That was a relationship, after all; both people had to make compromises.
At some point, Amanda took Professor Oak's aptitude test and learned that she was to become a Braixen. She didn't have any idea how the system had decided that for her, and after her abysmal matchup with Kyle, she wasn't sure she trusted it. And yet, she simply had no choice.
She received medication to take that would facilitate her transformation, which had two major side effects. One was to make it harder to sleep; she'd find herself waking at four in the morning on many occasions. The other was to greatly increase her appetite.
On one occasion, Amanda had returned home from her assignment at Eatsa Pizza to find Kyle in the kitchen, having gotten back from his own assignment early. She didn't know what his chore for the day had been, since they weren't talking to each other very much.
Kneading the dough had been torture; being so famished, surrounded by piping-hot pizza, submarine sandwiches, and other items of pure deliciousness, and yet not being allowed to take a bite, was worthy of hell rather than heaven. She was reminded of that character from mythology whose punishment was to stand in a lake underneath a fruit tree, yet be unable to eat or drink.
"What's for dinner?" Kyle asked. "It's your turn to cook." He didn't sound particularly forceful, but it was clear that he expected her to make their evening meal.
The days had started to blend together, even though she had established a routine to some degree. Amanda couldn't remember if she'd cooked supper yesterday or not.
"I think it's your turn," she told Kyle. Her stomach was growling, and she knew that cooking wasn't going to be fun until she actually got to eat. "Didn't I do it yesterday?"
Her designated soulmate shrugged. "Well, I really don't feel like cooking either. In fact, I never feel like cooking, but I do it anyway because I have to."
Amanda narrowed her eyes as she felt a prickling sensation around her ears and back. "All we have when it's your turn are TV dinners, which barely even count as food. Surely we deserve better than that, since we made it to paradise!"
Not for the first time, she wondered how Kyle had even achieved Paradise Island, but she didn't bring it up. She never had, and never would.
"I don't know about you, but my paradise is eating in front of the television. I guess we just aren't compatible in that regard, but we don't have to eat together. I'll make my food, and you can make yours."
Amanda shook her head, trying to resist the temptation to raise her voice. "I'm not going to make dinner tonight. I spent eight hours at Eatsa Pizza, making pizzas, and I'm sick of food preparation for today! It just makes me hungrier!"
"Then you can have an apple or something to tide you over."
She snorted. "Yeah, and risk spoiling my appetite? That's not how I was raised, Kyle, and you know that."
"Have it your way. But I'd rather you cooked tonight, because I'm exhausted. Was working in the wheat fields today, making bread. Literal bread."
Amanda couldn't help but roll her eyes. "Clever. Did it take all day for you to come up with that line?"
Kyle glared at his designated soulmate. "Why do you care? It's none of your business!"
There were so many things Amanda could have said in response to that, but most of them might be seen as rude. But then again, Kyle had been rude to her, so maybe it was justified.
It took about five seconds for that thought to make her feel sick to her stomach. If a relationship was built on annoying each other and retribution for such actions, was it really a healthy one?
Of course not.
In the end, they reached a compromise. Each of them sacrificed something: Kyle would make a TV dinner for himself, and Amanda would cook up some soup for herself. They'd both eat what they wanted, but neither of them would be free from cooking.
In weeks to come, Amanda would look back on this evening as the tipping point in their relationship. It was as though the timeline of the soulmate partnership between Amanda Mariner and Kyle Jacobs comprised two nations, the nations of Before and After.
In the land of Before, Amanda and Kyle had spent a large amount of time bickering with one another, simply due to their incompatible personalities. Kyle almost always wanted to be alone, whereas Amanda was a social butterfly and couldn't stand the thought of a loveless relationship.
No matter how hard she tried, her designated soulmate would simply push her away. The more she made an effort to reach out to him, the more forcefully Kyle would reject her. He'd constantly have an excuse not to eat dinner together, or to not go for a walk on the beach with her.
I'm trapped here, Amanda once found herself thinking. This is the most beautiful prison I've ever heard of. And how crazy is it that many people hold onto every second, whereas time just drags on and on for me?
The algorithm doesn't make mistakes. Those words Professor Oak had said to her all those weeks ago seemed to be mocking her now. It was as though the professor got some sick, twisted satisfaction out of seeing her suffer?
What if they're trying to trick me into thinking this is paradise, but they're actually torturing me? But if they're trying to fool me into liking this place, they're doing a pretty piss-poor job of it!
One night, as Amanda lay awake in bed reading one of the many novels on the shelf, a thought occurred to her. It hit her right between the eyes and caused a pounding headache, so intense that she put the book down and put a palm to her head.
She increasingly believed that there were only two possibilities: Either the algorithm did make mistakes, contrary to what Professor Oak had insisted, or she was being lied to about this being paradise.
I mean, the second option seems pretty plausible. Think about it and look around: would you call this a utopia?
Of course you wouldn't.
Another month went by, this one much more slowly than the first. Amanda was being tormented, not just by the mental spider web she was ensnared in, but also by the increasing hunger pangs as her transition into a Braixen continued.
Waking up one morning, two months after her arrival on Paradise Island, she felt so hungry that she barely had the energy to sit up in bed. It was as though much of her life force had been sucked dry, to the point that there was almost nothing left.
In addition, her whole body was very itchy, and her rear end felt as though it were being crushed. Something just wasn't quite right.
Reminding herself that if she didn't get up, she'd never get to eat the breakfast she desperately needed, Amanda managed to rise from her twin bed. Making her way to the bathroom to brush her teeth, she was arrested at the sight of herself in the mirror.
Where her face should have been, there was a mass of white and yellow fur, with eyes halfway between red and orange. Orange tufts of fur rose out of her yellow ears, and, as she looked down, Amanda saw that her legs were made up of dark gray peach fuzz.
It finally happened. After all of this, I have become a Braixen.
Part of her was relieved that the long, arduous transition was finally over. Another part, however, was filled with worry about the future. How would she cope with being a Pokemon? To name just two examples, showering and writing would be made more challenging.
Still, the worst of it was probably over. It was the same way with her relationship with her designated soulmate.
Of course, "soulmate" was by now a very generous word to use. By this time, Amanda had fully accepted that they were simply roommates who tried to get out of each other's way, and Kyle seemed to accept this too. There was no more anger, but also no passion. They were simply two people (or rather, a person and a Pokemon) who happened to live together.
They didn't talk as often as they used to, which was saying something; even during the first couple of weeks, they already hadn't been too close with one another. But once they'd come to a mutual understanding that there would be no romance between them, everything became far more amicable, far more manageable.
Would they ever be friends? Maybe not, but they didn't have to talk to each other any more than they wanted to. To Amanda, there was a difference between being friendly with someone and being friends with them.
She wouldn't go out of her way to spend time with Kyle, but she didn't actively hate him either. Both of them were just playing poker with weak hands, trying to make the best of their cards and not deluding themselves into thinking they had full houses.
Once she had finished brushing her teeth on that particular morning, Amanda started making her way downstairs. With every step, her stomach growled, feeling emptier and emptier every second.
Once she was in the kitchen, she saw that Kyle was already there. This was a rarity; normally, her designated soulmate slept considerably later than she did. He was eating a bowl of cereal and looking at a sheet of paper on the table.
"We need to talk," he told Amanda as soon as he noticed her.
She didn't know how to feel about this. After several weeks with relatively few hiccups, Kyle found something important enough to bring up to her.
"What about?" the Braixen asked cautiously, feeling as though she were in a minefield. If she said something wrong, or said it in the wrong manner, she would explode into bits and pieces.
Kyle set his spoon down and sighed. He then said the words that Amanda had considered many times, but ultimately never had the courage to speak.
"I want a divorce."
"You...what?" Amanda sputtered. On some level, she'd known this would happen eventually. She just didn't expect it so soon, or for Kyle to be the initiator.
Her soon-to-be-ex-soulmate narrowed his eyes. "Divorce. Defined by the dictionary as, the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body. I want a divorce."
The possibility had been tantalizing before, but now that it was actually going to happen, Amanda found her stomach tied up in knots. Of course, it took two to have a successful soulmate partnership, but it only took one to dissolve it.
"Why?" Amanda asked. "We were getting along so well together!"
She didn't believe her own words; in the future, she'd be fully willing to admit that she was more trying to convince herself than to convince Kyle.
"No, we weren't," the young man insisted. "We really, really weren't. I hate to break it to you, Amanda, but we've been pretty much separate from each other the last few weeks. We've grown apart, and I just don't think this can continue."
These were Amanda's thoughts: Oh, so YOU say we've grown apart. Maybe if you hadn't been so antisocial, we could have lasted longer! Maybe we would be happy together instead of getting divorced.
It was a strange truth, but now that her partnership with Kyle was coming to an end, Amanda started to dread the idea of not having a partner. Nobody to talk to when she got home from work. Nobody to share a meal with, nobody to walk with on the beach. Admittedly, Kyle hadn't been very good company, but he was still company.
Then again, some would say that bad company is worse than no company.
"Kyle, you don't understand. Getting divorced isn't simple on Earth, but here it's really hard to get rid of a soulmate. Raina…".
"Who's Raina?"
Amanda shook her head. "That's not important. She said that rumor has it, if you leave your soulmate here, horrible things are going to happen to you. I'm scared to see what those might be."
It might have been a rumor, but she was still terrified of the possibility. What if it was true?
"Are you just trying to manipulate me, to trick me into staying with you?" Kyle half-snapped, half-roared. "Because if so, it isn't going to work. I've already made up my mind, Amanda; accept it and move on."
It hurt to hear that Kyle didn't believe her, but, when she really thought about it, Amanda didn't blame her now-estranged soulmate for being skeptical. After all, she'd heard plenty of acrimonious divorce stories in which people manipulated and screwed over their exes, just for the hell of it.
I never thought I'd become one of them. That's the hardest thing to come to terms with.
"You're right, Kyle," Amanda admitted. "I can't back up my claim."
The young man nodded. "Trust me, you're going to be happier without me. No offense, but I know that I'll be happier without you."
That's Kyle Jacobs for you, always brutally honest. I might miss that about him.
In an Earthly divorce, there was very often a custody battle to deal with, as well as many financial matters to be squared away. Of course, the dissolution of a soulmate partnership was very different from how it would be on Earth.
Some things, of course, were the same. As soon as Kyle sent word to Enil Edam of his divorce petition, Professor Oak summoned one of his Laurens to act as a mediator between the Braixen and her estranged soulmate.
"Hi there!" Lauren exclaimed as she entered 1109 Palm Drive. Even though the circumstances weren't exactly happy, she still wore the same smile she always had on her face.
"Hello, Lauren," Amanda told the professor's assistant morosely.
"There's no need to be so sad, Amanda Mariner. By all accounts, you weren't very happy with Kyle. And you're not relieved that he filed?"
"It's really complicated," the Braixen told Lauren, making sure that Kyle was out of earshot. "Sometimes I just don't know how to feel about it."
Lauren nodded. Even though Amanda strongly suspected her to be a robot, she had to admit that Lauren was a good listener.
Truth be told, Amanda would never really know how to feel about the end of her relationship with Kyle. Perhaps she'd be able to cope with it by telling herself that she'd never truly had anything with him; she'd thought the flames had gone out, but they had never existed in the first place.
But there was still one burning question that she needed to have answered, so she went for it.
"I've heard that if you get divorced on Paradise Island, the person who leaves suffers a terrible fate. Is that true?"
"I'm sorry, that is one of the five hundred and forty-seven things I'm not allowed to tell you" Lauren replied, and Amanda could tell that she really meant it.
The Braixen knew immediately that the answer was yes. Lauren didn't even have to tell the truth, because if there weren't horrible consequences for leaving a soulmate partnership, she could have just said so. Did she really need the professor's permission?
After Kyle returned to the foyer from where he'd just been, the three of them sat down to work out a settlement.
"You can have the house, Amanda" was the first thing Kyle said. He spoke softly, his head hanging low as though he were distraught.
The Braixen didn't know whether to take his words at face value or not. Perhaps he was being genuine in saying that she could have the house, but she knew enough about divorce cases to know that if something sounded too good to be true, it usually was.
"Are you sure about that?" Lauren asked Kyle. "Where are you going to live after you leave this home?"
"I'll figure something out," the forever-young man replied, shrugging. "But since I'm the one who opted out of this partnership, I'm fine not living here anymore."
"No" Amanda found herself saying. She'd never thought she would stand up for Kyle, least of all right now, but sometimes our instincts aren't logical.
"What do you mean, no? It's my afterlife!" Kyle exclaimed, using the same refrain that he'd utilized on numerous occasions prior to this. "And if I don't want to be here anymore, why are you complaining?"
Amanda still found this rather suspicious. Her ex-soulmate wasn't supposed to give up this easily. That's not how this was supposed to work. Surely he was trying to play a trick on her!
She voiced her concerns, figuring that it was safe to do so with Lauren as the mediator. "I don't think you're being genuine, Kyle. I think you're trying to pull a fast one here."
Her ex shook his head. "I know how incredibly difficult it may be for you to believe me, but I'm telling the truth. Lauren, can you vouch for me?"
So Lauren's a lie detector as well?
Lauren seemed to think deeply about this for a good minute, but then she gave Amanda a sad look.
"He's telling the truth, Amanda. He really does seem willing to give you everything."
"Wait a minute...everything?" the Braixen exclaimed, suddenly feeling the strongest urge to save Kyle from himself. He was going to stand up and run, leaving every aspect of his afterlife in the home with Amanda.
Kyle nodded. Through tears, he responded by saying, "Yes, Amanda. Everything. Even though it's the best thing for me, I feel horrible about leaving you; consider this my alimony payment."
Amanda didn't know what to say. After so much time spent bickering with Kyle, so many nights alone in bed without anyone to talk to...it was hard to comprehend that she'd end up missing him. To some extent, she wished Kyle were staying.
But ultimately, it wasn't a healthy situation for either of them. Even if they cohabited peacefully, there were still better possibilities for both of them, and by remaining together, they would be depriving each other of happier afterlives.
"Well, then. Kyle Jacobs, do you understand the full implications of your request? That you will be leaving here with nothing but the clothes on your back and anything else you can carry, and that you'll be without a soulmate for an indefinite period of time?"
Kyle didn't even hesitate. "I do. And I still want to leave."
I can't stop him from leaving. The most I can do is to stay out of his way.
"Fine," Amanda replied curtly. Turning to her ex, she said, "I wish you all the best in your future endeavors, Kyle Jacobs."
Her ex then did something Amanda had hardly ever seen him do: He smiled.
"You too, Amanda Mariner. I might be lonely for a while, being without a soulmate, but this is the way it has to be."
"If it makes you feel any better", the Braixen girl blurted out against her own better judgment, "you never had a soulmate. I never thought we were a good fit for one another."
She realized then that it was the wrong thing for her to say. Even if Kyle told Amanda that he was over her, that's not what he'd shown her. Kyle had appeared to be on the verge of tears throughout that conversation.
Well, he's not my problem anymore. He's the one who left, not me.
When her ex didn't respond to Amanda's attempt at reassurance, she asked another question. "Where are you going to reside? Aren't you technically homeless now?"
Lauren shook her head. "Paradise Island has a special place for those without soulmates to live. It's completely cut off from the rest of the island, so once Kyle leaves, you will never see him again."
Amanda resisted the temptation to break down at that very moment. Even if she had no love for Kyle Jacobs, the thought of him all on his own, not getting to interact with any friends he had here, was almost torture. Almost.
It had hardly ever occurred to Amanda that Kyle might have forged friendships on Paradise Island; after all, he had his chores to do as well. Of course, given what Amanda knew about her ex, there was every possibility that he was just as much of a loner during his assignments as he was at home.
And suddenly, there were so many things she wanted to say to Kyle, so many words that had never left her tongue. Part of living on Paradise Island was knowing that you had all the time in the world, and now she had to accept that she didn't have forever to speak to her ex. In fact, she didn't have much time at all.
Before she could say any of those things, Kyle spoke for her. "I think I'd better get ready," he said.
Since Kyle was leaving with barely any belongings, there wasn't much packing to be done. Within fifteen minutes he'd done everything he felt he needed to, and came back down to the living room to say goodbye.
What was Amanda going to say? I love you? No, she couldn't say that, because it just wasn't true. She didn't love Kyle, but was it fair to say that she felt sorry for him? Absolutely.
She wanted to rope Kyle in for a hug; it was a rather odd inclination, but she wanted to have some closure on the relationship. However, it would just be awkward at this point, and only make the inevitable parting more painful.
"Goodbye, Amanda" the young man told her, with absolutely no emotion behind it. He seemed completely resigned to his fate, whatever it may be.
She had to avoid getting choked up, so she kept it short. "Goodbye, Kyle."
With that, her ex-soulmate picked up his belongings and began following Janet to a white van. There were some words on it that Amanda couldn't make out.
Kyle stepped into the van and didn't look back. He didn't even wave at Amanda, as if he simply wanted to get the formalities over with and move on to his new afterlife. She didn't blame him; most people didn't tend to hang out with their exes.
The sliding door was slammed shut, and a driver whose profile Amanda couldn't see from here revved the engine. After a false start, the van drove away, and it was then that the Braixen allowed the tears to flow.
She never saw him again.