"Let's go away for the weekend," he said one morning over coffee. They were at their usual spot - a cafe halfway between their apartments and relatively close to work for both of them. The conversation that morning had been lighthearted, so when he brought up this suggestion her immediate reaction was to laugh. Looking up at him, however, she could see he was serious. "El, you know I would love to, but I can't leave Noah for an entire weekend. I already miss too much time with him as it is because of work."

She watched him anxiously. Things had been going so well between the two of them. After ten years without him, the last thing she wanted was to push him away. They had both been very clear in the beginning though - anything that detracted from their job as parents would have to wait. There had been times when both had to cancel plans because of this agreement, but this was more than just a scrapped lunch date.

He sat quietly for a moment before bringing the coffee cup to his lips. The street was relatively quiet, and he watched as people hurried about. Turning back to look at her he asked, "What if the boys came with us?" He watched her expression change from concern to confusion and he couldn't help but smile. "Denise's family has a lake house. Now that I'm in her good graces, she offered it to me for the weekend. I guess it's pretty big, so I thought I could bring Eli, maybe invite the older kids...you could bring Noah...might be fun?"

"Elliot…" She wasn't sure what to say. Her love for his children ran deep, and so far they had been understanding, but that didn't change the fact that their mother was gone and their father was dating his ex-partner. It was a lot. And then there was Noah. He and Elliot had formed an easy bond over the past few months and he liked Eli, but there was still an age gap there. And he hadn't even met the older Stabler children.

"Liv?" The sound of his voice brought her back. "You don't have to answer right now. Bell said the invitation is open. Just think about it, ok?" He stood up, leaned carefully over the table, and kissed her gently. "I've gotta go or I'm going to be late. I'll call you later." She smiled, stealing one more kiss before they both headed in opposite directions.

Mentally he was kicking himself as he walked to work. He knew she would be hesitant, but he hadn't expected that reaction. Everything had been going so well between the two of them. Had he misread her feelings? No, he knew she felt the same way he did. Damage control was necessary. He made a couple of calls and then quickly sent her a text:

I'm sorry about this morning. It's ok if you're not ready. I'm not going anywhere.

Meanwhile, a slide show of past relationships was playing in her mind. Why did she always run when things got serious? For years she had lied to herself, making excuses about why each man wasn't the one so she wouldn't have to face the truth. To be honest, she wasn't completely sure what the truth was. Was it because she grew up without a father? She didn't have a male role model to show her what a relationship should look like. Maybe it was because of her job? It was necessary to show strength, to push away any signs of weakness, to be less feminine if she wanted to be treated as an equal. Maybe subconsciously she had convinced herself that giving herself completely to a man would detract from that?

Or maybe it was because they weren't him. But if that was true, why didn't she just say yes to his offer?

She was stepping onto the elevator when her phone buzzed with a text notification from him. She read it and sighed, frustrated with herself that she had made him feel as if he had done something wrong. Quickly she typed a response:

I didn't mean to worry you. It was just a lot to think about. Why don't you and Eli come over for dinner tonight and we can talk more then?

She tried to push aside the conversation and focus on work. In her office, Fin and Rollins briefed her on a new case before heading out to follow some leads. Kat stayed behind, manning the phones and putting in calls for phone records of the names connected to the case. Liv was busy most of the morning with paperwork, emails, and a call to Garland. The conversation faded into the background, but it hadn't disappeared completely, like the low rumble of thunder after a storm had passed.

At around 11:45, someone knocked on her office door. It was a delivery...two actually. A woman with a small pink ranunculus bouquet entered first, followed by a man holding a very familiar bag from her favorite deli. She thanked both of them as they placed their deliveries on her desk. As she reached for the card attached to the bouquet, she stopped to smell the lovely pink blooms. The card read simply, "I'm really sorry - El." Just then her phone rang, his name lighting up the screen.

"Did you get your delivery?" he asked.

"Yes, I did. Very sweet but completely unnecessary, El."

"I felt bad about this morning. I don't want you to ever feel like I'm pressuring you to move faster than you're comfortable with. I just thought a getaway sounded nice...more than just a few hours with you sounded nice. I'm sorry, Liv."

"I know. I'm sorry too. I overreacted and didn't listen to what you were trying to tell me." Out of the corner of her eye she saw Fin and Rollins return to the squadroom. "Hey El, Fin and Amanda just got back and I should probably eat this sandwich before it gets cold. Did you get my message about dinner tonight? Great, I'll see you at 6."

Fin appeared in the doorway as she was confirming their dinner plans. "I take it things are going well, Captain?" he said with his trademark smirk. "Yes," she answered, "If I don't manage to mess it all up. What did you and Rollins find out?"

He filled her in on the three leads they had checked on. One had an alibi, but the other two claimed they were alone at the time of the crime. Kat was still waiting for the phone records, which they were hopeful would shine some light on how to proceed. Before he turned to leave, he looked at Olivia and said, "By the way? You're not going to mess this up. You and Stabler have been annoying me for too many years for either of you to give up now." She smiled, unwrapped her sandwich, and threw the paper at him. "Out," she said playfully.

She knew that Eli loved Mexican food, so she decided to make enchiladas and Spanish rice for dinner. She really wanted to get into his good graces, but she also didn't want to push. Everything was just about ready when the doorbell rang. Not wanting anything to burn, she yelled to her son, "Noah, can you get that sweetheart?"

Jumping off the couch and walking over to the door, she heard Noah open the door, then heard his voice. "Hey buddy," Elliot said to her son. "Hi, Elliot. Hi, Eli. Come in. Mom's in the kitchen."

Mom's in the kitchen. Sometimes he still couldn't believe that Liv was finally living her dream of being a mother. He had finally got the whole story of his adoption, and he couldn't help but be grateful to the judge that saw in her what he had always known was there.

"Hey," Elliot said as he walked over and gave her a hug. They were careful about how much physical contact they shared around the boys, but hugs seemed alright. "Hi. I'm glad you guys could make it. Hey, Eli." She smiled. Despite the amount of times they had all four done things together, she still found herself amazed that this young man with long dark hair was the same baby she had held in the back of an ambulance so many years ago.

"Hi, Olivia. Dinner smells great." Eli was a quiet kid. Elliot had tried to reassure her that it was just his personality, but she couldn't shake the feeling that he was still grieving and probably not thrilled about this situation. Honestly, she couldn't blame him. She tried to imagine how Noah would behave if something ever happened to her, and she used that as a stepping stone in her interactions with Eli. "Thanks. Everything should be ready in about 20 minutes if you boys want to go watch something in the living room."

As soon as the boys were out of the room, Elliot grabbed her wrist tenderly and pulled her into a kiss. "I'm sorry about this morning. I am perfectly happy with where we are right now, and I never meant to upset you or make you feel pressured into something."

She stopped him with another kiss, bringing her hands up to rest on his chest. "You did nothing wrong. This morning was about me. You've been so understanding and patient, and I appreciate that. The thought of spending the weekend with you...El, I want you to understand that just because it scares the hell out of me doesn't mean I don't want to."

"I know," he said, turning to stir the rice. "But it's really nice to hear you say it." Smiling at her with that look in his eyes that always put her at ease, she walked to the oven to check on the enchiladas before sneaking in one last kiss. "Boys, dinner is ready."

Elliot and Olivia carried the food to the table as Noah and Eli sat down. "It smells really good, Mom!" Noah exclaimed eagerly. They all took turns serving themselves and immediately dug in. She was used to eating with one boy at dinner, and now she was surrounded by three. As she sat eating slowly and watching the food disappear at record pace, she wondered what it would be like to have dinner like this every night. All three of them were so different and held such different spaces in her heart, but she loved each one. Maybe a weekend away wasn't such a bad idea after all.

After dinner Elliot and Eli offered to help with dishes, but Liv refused. "That's what the dishwasher is for!" she had insisted. "Dinner really was good, Olivia," Eli said as he shuffled back and forth on his feet. She could tell he wasn't quite sure what to say or how to act, but bless his heart he was trying. "Thank you, Eli. I know it wasn't the authentic Spanish cuisine you love, but I'm glad you liked it." She smiled at him and to her surprise, he smiled back. A genuine, happy smile that melted her heart. "If you're sure we can't help, I probably need to get this guy home. Soccer practice before school…" Elliot said.

"Right, and you need to get to bed too, mister," she said to her son. Noah said his goodbyes and ran to his room to get ready for bed while Liv walked Elliot and his son to the door. "Thanks again for dinner," Eli said as he opened the door. "Yes, thank you Liv. It was delicious," he said, hugging her tightly. Her arms wrapped around him, holding him close as she whispered in his ear, "I promise I will think about the lake house and let you know soon." Glancing over at Eli and seeing his son was standing in the hallway facing away from them, Elliot lightly kissed her on the cheek. "Take your time," he whispered back.