The pictures he had showed her didn't do this place justice.
Denise's family's lake house looked like something out of a New England travel magazine. It was a traditional, two-story Adirondack style house right on the water. There was a large deck overlooking the lake and a private dock. Inside, Elliot gave them the tour; a large, open family room and kitchen, guest bathroom, and master bedroom on the first floor. Upstairs was an open loft area with four more bedrooms and a large jack and jill bathroom. For tonight it was just the four of them, but tomorrow his older children were coming...sort of an end of summer celebration.
"Mom, which room is ours?" Noah asked, eager to put his suitcase down and change into his swim trunks. "You and your mom get the big bedroom downstairs, buddy. My crew will take these rooms." Noah quickly ran downstairs, dragging his suitcase as he went. Walking into the large master bedroom with it's big screen TV and king sized bed, he exclaimed, "SWEET!"
She felt guilty about Elliot giving them the largest bedroom. "Are you sure, El? We don't need that much space. Why don't you and Eli take that room?"
"I'm sure, Liv. All of the rooms have the same sized beds. This will give you and Noah some privacy, and it will give me the opportunity to spend more time with the kids." Ever since his children had all confirmed they would be there Saturday, he had had an extra twinkle in his eyes. He was excited to spend time with them, and it was one of the things that made her love him even more.
A few months ago, the thought that she might love him had scared her. Now, figuring out how and when to tell him was what made her feel apprehensive.
Noah emerged from the master with swim trunks on, sunblock and towel in hand. He handed her the sunblock, letting her spray him down without argument. "Be careful and stay close to the dock and to Eli. Elliot and I will be on the deck, so just yell if you need us." "I will, Mom. I promise. Ready, Eli?" The youngest Stabler was descending the stairs in his trunks, his long hair pulled back in a small bun. "Let's go, kid. When we're done swimming we can take a spin on the paddle boat." Noah's eyes went wide. "There's a PADDLE BOAT?! This place is AWESOME!" Both boys were headed out the door when Noah stopped. Turning around, he walked over to Elliot, wrapping his arms around the man. "Thank you for inviting us, Elliot." She watched her son disappear from sight as the man she loved pulled her son into his arms, and she felt the tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. "You're welcome, Noah. I'm really glad you and your mom are here." She heard her son running out the door to catch up with Eli, and then she felt Elliot behind her.
"Everything ok?" he asked, running his hands along her arms and leaning in close. She wiped the tears away and leaned back against him. "Everything is perfect. It just makes me emotional to see Noah so happy...to see the two people I care about most in this world with their arms around one another…" she trailed off, closing her eyes and letting this feeling of contentment wash over her.
He brushed her hair to the side, planting a kiss on the spot below her ear that he knew gave her goosebumps. "You and Noah being here is what will make this weekend perfect. Why don't you head out to the deck and I'll grab us a couple of beers."
Outside the boys were diving off the dock, splashing each other, and having a blast. For her, it was nice to see Noah have a boy to play with. A guy he could talk to about things she knew he didn't want to discuss with his mom. Elliot appeared from the house with drinks in hand and looked out at the water. He was just as thrilled to see Eli relax and have fun. He was a quiet, serious kid anyway, and his mother's death had caused him to draw into his shell even more.
Sitting here with him, cold beer in hand, the lake breeze blowing in her hair and the sounds of laughter on the water...everything really was perfect. "It's so quiet and peaceful here. I love the city, but sometimes I think living in a place like this would be nice."
Hearing her say that made him smile. "Maybe one day when we retire, we can buy a house like this...spend our summers on the lake, have the kids over."
When we retire. She hadn't missed his choice of words. "We?" she asked quietly. "Is that something you think about often?"
"You mean, us? Our future? Yeah, I do." He paused, looking into her dark brown eyes. "Do you?"
"More and more lately," she admitted. "Good," he said with a smirk. "Because I kind of like spending time with you, Benson." Setting her beer down, she got up from her seat and moved over to sit on his lap before planting a kiss softly on his lips. "What was that for?" he whispered as he rested his forehead against hers. "Just because I kinda like spending time with you too, Stabler."
With the boys in the water and no one else in sight, he took advantage of having her here in his arms. Pulling her closer, he brought his lips to rest against hers. She moved with him, opening her mouth to allow him access, which he eagerly accepted. Her hands rested on either side of his face, her fingertips playing in his short hair. She sighed as she felt his hands travel up her back and into her hair as well. She loved the feel of him - his lips, his hands, his chest. If this is what she had to look forward to in retirement, she was ready to put her papers in.
He pulled back, smiling at her. "I think I could get used to this," he said, running his hand through her hair and down her back. "The boys will be hungry soon," he said, shifting gears. "I was going to grill some steaks. What else sounds good?"
"Let me take care of the sides," she said, stealing another kiss before standing and heading toward the kitchen.
While she whipped up a bowl of garlic mashed potatoes and chopped some summer vegetables for him to grill, Elliot got the grill fired up and kept an eye on the boys as he cooked the steaks. Noah and Eli were lying on the dock, soaking in the sun and drying out a little before dinner. He could see Liv through the sliding glass door, scooping peppers, mushrooms, and squash into a large bowl. He was so used to the no nonsense, tough, fearless detective that he had spent twelve years working with side by side, and he loved that woman. He loved that she was with him because she wanted to be, not because she needed him. But looking at her through the window, her hair up in one of those messy buns that he loved, standing there in a pair of black tights and a plain white t-shirt...this was the Liv that only he got to see. The Liv that was beginning to let her guard down.
The Liv that he was falling more in love with by the day.
She brought the veggies out to him and said she was going to go check on the boys. He skewered the vegetables and laid them on the grill, then turned to watch her walking down the dock. The way she moved turned him on in ways he couldn't explain. She picked a spot on the dock between the two boys and laid down, stretching herself out in the sun. Soon he heard all three of them laughing and he smiled to himself, beyond thankful to be here with them.
"Dinner's ready!" he yelled from the deck. The boys hopped up quickly, grabbing their towels and racing each other to the table. She hung back, watching the two of them running happily. Suddenly it hit her how miraculous it was that both boys were here and healthy. Above her on the deck, Elliot was plating the steaks. She took a moment just to watch him. He did everything with such confidence. Dressed in an old pair of khaki shorts and an NYPD shirt, he looked more relaxed than she ever remembered. He also looked extremely sexy, but she tried not to focus on that too much. If she did...well, it was already difficult enough to keep her hands off him.
The steak was amazing. Between the four of them, there was nothing left to clean up, so they brought the dishes in and decided to go for a night swim. Elliot changed quickly, then he and the boys headed down while she changed into her suit - a simple black one piece. She wrapped a floral sarong around herself and took a breath, pausing to look in the mirror. This was the most revealing outfit he would see her in since he went undercover for that animal smuggling case, and she was nervous. She didn't look the same as she did back then, and though she was comfortable in her own skin, she still wanted him to find her desirable.
As she walked out to the lake she could hear the sounds of laughter filling the air. Elliot was in the water with the boys, playfully dunking his son and tossing Noah into the air. The muscles in his chest, arms, and back that were usually hidden from view were rippling with every movement and suddenly she was even more anxious about removing the sarong. She sat down on the deck and let her feet dangle in the water, watching them play. He swam over to her, pulling himself up onto the deck beside her. "You gonna get in?" he asked, leaning back and placing his right hand on the deck on the opposite side of her.
"Yeah, in a bit." He knew her well enough to know that there was something she wasn't saying, but he also had the feeling he shouldn't ask, so he kissed her shoulder and slipped back into the water. "We'll be waiting," he said, turning to swim out to where the boys were. She waited until he was a little farther away before removing the sarong and sliding into the water. Feeling slightly more confident in the safety of the water around her, she swam out to meet them.
He watched her playing with Noah in the water, the sunset behind her casting pink light on her dark hair. She was so effortlessly beautiful that everything around her paled in comparison. They must have swam for about an hour before they decided to head back to the dock. The boys were still going strong, so they let them continue to play as they headed in. As they approached the dock, he saw her slow, bobbing up and down in the water. He swam to her, wrapping his arms around her and feeling the bare skin of her back. His fingers ached to touch her. "Want some help onto the dock?" he asked as his hands dropped to her waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him sweetly before resting her head on his shoulder quietly.
"Liv? Is something wrong? You seemed so happy earlier...did I do something?" She sighed against him and raised her head to look into his eyes. "No. You haven't done anything. I'm just feeling a little self conscious. You still look like this," she said, running her hands over his arms, "...but I've changed. I just don't want you to be disappointed."
He was looking at her with genuine confusion. "How could I possibly be disappointed?"
"El, I know I don't look the same as I did when we met. I don't even look the same as I did when you left." She was serious, and it broke his heart that she saw herself that way.
"Liv, you have always been and will always be the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen. Always." He looked at her for a second before grabbing her waist a little tighter and lifting her up on the dock. He followed, reaching out a hand for her to stand with him. She stood in front of him, watching as his eyes traced the curves of her body. He smiled, taking a step towards her. "You are the most breathtaking thing I've ever seen, and every day I find myself a little more in love with you."
Her hands immediately went to his chest, stopping him from leaning in closer. "Wh...what did you just say?" She thought he had said it...thought she had heard it...but she needed to be sure. Or maybe she just wanted to hear him say it again.
"I said I love you. I'm in love with you, Olivia Benson. I've been trying to decide how and when to say it, but I think we should say it when the people we care about need to hear it. And right now I need you to hear that I love you, that I need you, and that I want you more than you will ever know."