Disclaimer: I do not own anything but this chapter is mine.
A/N: Again, I made sure to start writing this right after uploading Chapter 15th (January 10th GMT+8). I'm at the office—again—writing my ideas instead of working. LOL. Thank God my boss comes to work around ten in the evening. Anyway, I'm very happy with the reviews and the DMs. Glad majority of you are still active and is still patiently waiting for my lazy ass to update TGR. I was thinking of finishing this at exactly twenty chapters but, we'll never know. I might end up changing my mind. Again.
Anyway, read on! I hope that while reading this, I managed to upload it just in time. And not months later. 'Cause I'm lazy that way, man.
-TGP
-;-
So when your tears roll down your pillow like a river
I'll be there for you
I'll be there for you
When you're screaming, but they only hear you whisper
I'll be loud for you
But you gotta be there for me too
No one was able to know how much pain Ayuzawa Misaki has seen, how much torture she had undergone and how many deaths she had witnessed.
-;-
-;-
Sixteen:
Usui was as silent as the dead as he parked his car on the lot.
Peeking through the heavily tinted windows of his car, I noticed that the others arrived the same moment as us and is already scrambling towards the warm building due to the extremely cold weather. I glance at Usui who remained seated behind the wheels; his fingers tapping the steering wheel while looking at the white scenery before us.
I allowed myself to sink on the back rest of the upholstered seats; inhaling the very masculine scent of his car, still unable to believe that I'm here with him—and that we have actually reach this point in our lives. But still… "Sorry for getting you in trouble with your brother."
Usui actually had the nerve to snort at me. "That's not it."
"I'm pretty sure that's it." I told him; equally sardonic. "Aoi told me you're not in good terms with him." I wondered if I should tell him that I already know about his birth circumstance but thought better of it. If he's ready to tell me about it, that's the only time I'm going to bring it up in front of him. "And since your family had breezed through the topic about your future fiancé, I'm quite certain your brother doesn't want an unapproved girlfriend in the picture."
Once again, he'd snorted at me; finally tearing his eyes off the white scenery and boring them on my direction. My heart did weird little jumps when Usui Takumi finally turned his attention on me. I tried to shush it down before he could even notice it. "I will be the one to decide on who I want to be with. Not them."
I want to tell him that I don't think so but thought better of it again. I was quite certain that my response wouldn't be of much help on the situation anyway. I turned to him again; finally addressing the main problem at hand. "So, what's going to be my sickness tomorrow?"
"I told you already. Gerard's not going to bite that. And if you were to suddenly not appear when you already gave him a yes, he'd be more suspicious about your relationship with me." Lifting up his hand, I watched him in silence as he reached out for a lock of my hair and started twirling it around his point finger. "Although I'm not really certain how I should feel when you denied me in front of my brother and out friends."
I frowned at him. "Isn't that what we're supposed to do? Deny our relationship? I mean, I honestly don't mind. I don't want a prized student like you get in trouble just because you're dating someone like me."
"Cut it out." He says; mildly irritable and surprises me when he suddenly jumped off his car; rounding the hood so he can open the door to my side. He pulled me out of the vehicle as we walked side by side towards the building. "Give yourself some credit. Besides, you haven't been in trouble for the past weeks. That's an achievement."
I ignored that since I know he's just teasing me. "So, tell me about this dinner. How should I dress up tomorrow? I mean, I don't want to appear in shirt and jeans while you and the rest of your family are in formal attire. I'd probably stick out like a sore thumb more than I already am."
"Kaga will brief you. But wear a dress." He paused walking and gave me a full-on gaze from head-to-toe; his thumb and forefinger touching his chin as he analyze me while nodding. The sight of him chewing on his thumb distracted me more than it should. "Yeah. Definitely wear a dress. It should be blue. With long sleeves." He touches my hair and pulls them all to one side. "Tie your hair up like this so we can see the outline of your neck."
I slapped his hand away since I'm starting to get distracted by his mere touch. "Stop that. What are you? A designer?"
"I just know my taste in women." He drags me again towards the building and stops midway as though he remembered something.
My forehead creased. "What?"
"Nothing. I just don't want to go back to the dorm yet." He twirls a lock of my hair in his finger again before holding my bag for me and starts walking on the opposite direction—towards the vacant bleachers partially covered in snow. "Want to stay here for a bit?"
"I don't mind freezing to death. What about you?"
He chuckles at that and occupies a spot on the bleacher after dusting snow off of it. "What's your plan during the dance?"
"What do you mean? I'm still pushing through my initial plan to leave school that day. I'm not sticking around while you guys are dancing the night away."
"And I told you already that I'm planning to accompany you that day. I'm not planning to go to the dance at all." He leaned back on the bleacher seats looking as though he accomplished something great. "Are you really planning to go that shrine? What are you planning to do once you get there? Pray the day away?"
I scowled at him. But then again, he had a point. What was I planning to do there in the first place? I couldn't seem to remember anymore. All the things that I was planning to do were all seemed to be negated right after Usui Takumi started taking control over my life. I sighed. This isn't how I was planning to live my high school life. I turned to him again. "What do you want to do then?"
"Well… I have this particular place in mind. If you want to go, I don't mind tagging you along."
I was suddenly uncertain. "Okay?"
He stared into the white scenery again as though he remembered something sad; his face melancholic. "It's a place I try to visit whenever I can without fail—even if I'm not allowed to."
I wondered if it was about his mother and tried to push the question. "Why is that?"
He shrugged; returning his gaze on me. "I'll tell you when we get there. Anyway, as for tomorrow, the situation is not very ideal, but it's the first time I'm looking forward to it."
"Why do you say so? I'm probably just going to end up sticking out like a sore loser at your family dinner tomorrow. Trust me, I'd only embarrass you for not knowing which spoon or fork to use."
He laughs at that; an enthusiastic, carefree laugh that I haven't seen from him ever since I met him. "Just start from the inside out every time the course of the meal changes. You'll be sitting beside me so I'll just whisper which spoon to use if you're starting to panic."
"Hey, kick me if I start falling asleep, okay?" when he laughed again, I moved on with my next inquiry. "So, why is your brother asking about what my family does? Is he doing some sort of character investigation?"
Upon the remembrance of his brother, Takumi's face instantly darkened. "Well, to be frank—"
"You're always frank with me. What's new?"
He smiled at me despite being interrupted. "To be frank, he's probably planning to do a background check on you so he can use that to grill you during dinner." He shrugged again. "But don't worry; I won't let him do anything stupid tomorrow."
"You know that's not really what I'm worried about." When he glanced at me, I scowled. "You know what I'm talking about. I couldn't stay in a single place for a long time because we get noticed easily. My… family— and I—have been involved in shady suicides in town because of my curse. If your brother gets wind of that, I'm quite sure he'd do everything to remove any signs of me in your life."
"You're watching too much drama." He says with a roll of his eyes; clearly unaffected by what I just recently said. "Although your past might pose a bit of a problem for us, but I don't clearly care about that. I wanted to be with you."
I had to give it to him for his choice of words. And somehow, I felt a bit guilty for all the stupid decisions I made in my life during the past. I was so mad and bitter with the rest of the world that I didn't even consider that, someday, I'd meet someone I want to be with and that my background will be exposed one day. I exhaled again. "I'm a murderer, Takumi. I killed a lot of people and you know that. I'm not an ordinary human and you know that as well. Why do you still want me?"
"Honestly, I don't know. All I know is that I want you—despite everything. Don't you feel the same?"
I didn't know how to answer that. Or rather, I know how to. But I simply can't voice it out so casually. Not when his life is on the line by simply staying with me. Not when I still don't have the answer on how to lift my curse. Not when I want him too much to the point that I wanted to possess all him. We are both threading on thin ice. And one wrong move could break that ice… dragging us to the cold darkness underneath.
"You're still hesitating about me, aren't you?"
My gaze refocused on him. "I've never been sure of a lot of things in my life, Usui. I told myself that I'm never going to fall in love ever again—or want someone ever again. But here I am in front of you. I wanted you as well. But even if you accept everything about me, you have to know how dangerous it is to be with me. I don't know how to break this curse. And honestly, I'm starting to lose hope."
"Some curses are not meant to be broken, Ayuzawa. What if the way to break your curse is to actually find a way to work around it in order to lead a normal life? Your ancestors tried their very best to escape it but nobody was able to manage to do so. What if you actually try to do something that they didn't do?"
"To stop searching for a solution? Is that what you're trying to suggest? You've seen what I've been through, Usui. Didn't you force it out of me? But clearly, you don't seem to understand the meaning behind all of that. But then again, why would you?"
I was quick to turn away from him; leaving my bag behind as I made a beeline back to the dormitories. But before I could even go further, I winced when he managed to grab me by the arm, dragging me back to the bleachers; preventing me from walking out. And like the first touch, his grip was electrifying. I glared at him; accidentally activating the curse as my golden orbs reflected against his jade pools. But to my frustration, he was unaffected.
These are the times I wanted my curse to have an effect on him so I could escape this sort of situation. The leather band wrapped around my wrist started to emanate black smoke and before I could even predict what Usui was planning to do, I was taken aback when he suddenly covered my eyes and forced me against his chest.
"What the—"
He was quick to interrupt me. "Stop using your power against me. You know it's useless."
"Let go of me." I hissed; struggling to escape his grip while maintaining control of myself. I'm not certain yet how much of me—my cursed self—Usui could handle. And certainly, I wouldn't want to risk anything that might put him in grave danger.
But instead of letting go, he simply discarded my bracelet and threw it off to the snow—leaving my wrist partially burned—and locks me in his embrace again. I was momentarily comforted yet I was still furious. He couldn't understand me. Nobody could. And no one will ever understand how heavy this burden is that I'm carrying on my shoulders. No matter how much they say that what if I'm not supposed to break the curse, I've been living my entire life trying to find a way to lift it.
What else am I supposed to do with this lifetime if not that? How else am I supposed to save the next generation if I'm not supposed to break it on my time?
Where else am I supposed to go in order to lead a normal life?
"Calm down, Ayuzawa." Usui whispers against my hair as he cradled me against his broad chest; weaving his fingers through my locks in a comforting manner. "I'm here. I won't leave you."
"You will never understand me."
"I do. Weird, but I do."
"Liar."
He laughed at that before gently pushing me off so he can look down at me. "I guess I am. But I'm unexpectedly honest when it comes to you." Realizing that I didn't believe him, he pressed a soft kiss on my forehead before lifting my burned wrist. He frowned. "Don't do what you did a while ago ever again. I'll get mad at you."
"It will heal in a matter of minutes. I'm a monster, Usui."
His green orbs locked into mine before he decided to watch as the minor burn on my wrist started healing slowly. He sighed as my skin was restored into its inhumanly, perfect state. "I know you are. But crazy as it were, I'm still wretchedly in love with you—and all of your craziness… all of your monstrosity. I want all of that. Mine. Alone. I don't wanna share that with anyone—not even to our friends."
I didn't bother to sugarcoat my words. "You're crazy."
Usui laughed once again. "I guess so. But mainly about you. And you also know that I can't take my hands off you." Slowly, one hand gradually slid down from my back to my hips; dragging me closer to his as he sighed. "I'm starting to wonder if you really don't have an effect on me. This is scary."
"You should be." I say before finally pushing him off. Aside from the fact that we're in public and our actions are almost for everyone to see, I can't stand how close he was to me. If I get used to it and he finally realized how much in danger his life is for being with me, I'm sure it will take me a long time to recover from the loss and the longing. "That's what you should be feeling… instead of this intimacy."
He ignored that. "Come to think of it, I never got to ask you if you would come with me to the Christmas dance if I ended up inviting you when I bumped into you and Tora in our department. Would you give me a no as well?"
I didn't bother to think about that. "Of course."
Takumi paused momentarily before holding me at arm's length; his forehead creased in obvious confusion. "Why is that? You already liked me then, didn't you? Since you agreed on me giving you a drive."
"That and the dance are two different matters." I told him before grabbing my bag and making my way to the building; letting him know that I'm starting to get cold and that I want to get inside now. He obliged as he walked beside me; waiting for an answer. "I don't mind the offer of driving me… since I was thinking that you are probably just going to drop me off to my location and leave. The dance, however, is a different matter. I don't know how to dance."
"I know how to. What makes you think I'd leave you to your own devices after asking you to be my date?"
I chuckled darkly at that. He clearly hadn't seen me and my crippling clumsiness. "Well, even if you would be the one leading, I'd still say no. Aside from the obvious, I'd probably just either embarrassed myself to death or feel extra awkward being near you."
"The two reasons are manageable. But what's 'aside from the obvious'?"
I scowled at him and, after looking cautiously around me, I pointed out my eyes. "My curse, stupid. Have you forgotten about that completely? If everybody sees me while I'm all dressed up, things are bound to get bloody."
"Ah. You're right." He says while nodding. "I almost forgot about that part."
"That's the most important part so please do not forget." I reminded him and continuous to the building. I did my best on ignoring the eyes that were instantly on us. If I'm going to be really dating this person, then it means that I should probably get used to this kind of thing. When we reached the elevators, I turned to him; feeling slightly awkward. "Well, this is where we part."
"Do you want to sleep at my place tonight?"
I was stunned; my plans to hit the button postponed as I whirled around to face him. "What?"
"Alright, let me rephrase if it makes you uncomfortable. Is it okay if I sleep in your place tonight? I mean, it's not a school night. We can stay up as late as we can."
I was still petrified on my spot. This I didn't expect. I mean, he was the type to reiterate that female students should stay in their own departments and vice versa. "The dinner?"
Takumi rolled his eyes. "Don't be stupid. You can't have dinner in the morning."
"Morals?"
He laughed at that. And from what I see, he was having fun seeing me in this state. "Are you expecting that we'd do something immoral?" at my flush—and attempt to hide my face—he was quick to hold my chin up to tease me some more. "Well… I don't really mind doing some things. Though I doubt you'd be comfortable doing that in your dorm room with Kaga and Hanazono listening in the next room. If that's what you want, I suggest we go to my room instead."
I didn't think twice on my action. Without a second thought, my hand was quick to twist as I slapped him by the arm; turning my back on him the moment I heard the elevator pinged as it slid open.
He was still laughing as I got on the lift. "What's your response?"
"You're a pervert." I quickly hit the button to my floor and the button to close the elevator doors. But before it could even completely slide shut, Takumi was quicker as he blocked it with his hand. Stunned, I eyed him. "The heck's wrong with you?!"
"You know I was just kidding. But I meant the first question. What's your response?" His eyes were a molten shade of green as it burned to mine. For a moment, I was at a lost on what to do. And once again, he unleashed the power of his green eyes on mine; making me the submissive one instead of the dominant one. "Well? Would you like to meet again after a few hours? In your room? As far as I know, Kaga and Hideki are planning to have a movie night tonight. We could join them… if you want."
Ah, darn it. I want that. In the end, I couldn't help the sigh that escapes my throat as I stared at him. This is so unfair. Why am I the one giving in to him? "Fine."
Takumi beamed. "Good. I'll see you later."
I was still in seventh heaven as I nodded. "Alright."
When he leaned forward, my eyes automatically slammed shut as I anticipated for his kiss. His lips were moist and soft as it caressed mine. And just like the first kiss that we have had, so, so many colors exploded behind my eyes. There were varying shades of green and amber and red that I could almost equally taste, smell and feel it.
My heart thudded painfully when he pressed his lips harder against mine and, before I could even realize what was happening, he pushed the tip of his tongue past my mouth. Stunned, I was quick to withdraw as I covered my mouth; my ears and eyes feeling extra hotter than normal—as if I've been electrocuted.
He laughed at that but it didn't escape my eyes that the tips of his ears are turning a light shade of pink. He leaned back on the walls; still preventing the elevator doors from closing; his arms crossed over his broad chest while thumbing his lower lip. "Sorry."
Despite the embarrassment, I still managed to play it cool. "You don't look the least bit apologetic though."
"Maybe because I want to do it again. But not until you say yes to my question."
My forehead creased at that. "What do you mean? Did you ask me something that I left unanswered?" I was confused for a moment as I tried to recollect his questions that I was pretty sure I've answered as much as I could.
He shrugged. "Well, we had an agreement but I realized later in the day that I wasn't satisfied with us simply trying."
I was confused once again; uncertain with where he was going with this. "What do you mean unsatisfied? And simply trying what?"
"Trying to be together. I'm unsatisfied with that."
Okay…? "Er, does that mean that you want us to go back to being… friends?"
He'd snorted at that. "Stupid. I wish you could read my mind right now so you'd know how… infatuated I am with you—for the lack of a better word. I don't usually say stuff like this but if you were in my shoes, even you would be embarrassed by the things I wanted to do with you—guaranteed not friendly."
Blood was quick to climb up from the tips of my toes to my face. I wanted to hit him for being so brutally frank. "P-Pervert…! Just stop going in circles and ask away so I could leave! I'm freezing in here!" That was a lie. I was actually burning… melting.
"Fine, since you're being awfully slow today." Takumi rolled his eyes once again. Shoving his hands in the pockets of his trousers, he locked green eyes on me; his eyes equally intense and burning and sharp I had to swallow or else I'd suffocate. "I'm asking you to be my girlfriend, Ayuzawa."
I doubled over. This I wasn't expecting. "W-W-What…?"
"Funny. I thought I asked it loud and clear." His tone was equally amused and sarcastic I almost wanted to hit him. "But fine. I'm asking you to be my girlfriend… please?"
His eyes burned into mine again. And it was the kind of burning I have never witnessed before—not even when he forced me to ride with him earlier in the morning to school. And he was so, so beautiful I realized a second later that I couldn't breathe. Is this what my victims' feels like whenever they'd look into my eyes only to get affected by my curse? Once again, I did the fatal mistake of allowing myself to drown in his searing gaze, breathing through my mouth and nose at the same time as my heart started to beat erratically fast.
Everything around me was suddenly spinning—the walls, the floor and ceiling—except for Usui Takumi. And at that very moment, he was much more radiant than before. How can someone be so… so inhumanly beautiful than I am? This is unbelievable.
When the corner of his lips curved heavenward for an amused smirk, I was momentarily returned to my reality. Still dazed, I violently shook my head. "Um…"
"You will, right?"
And when he poured the intensity and pressing weight of the power of his eyes on me, I didn't have any other choice but to nod. Heck, I didn't even had the chance to utter a proper response… all because I was speechless on both his very sudden question and beautiful appearance.
My heart thudded painfully when he suddenly beamed. "Really? Is that a yes?"
"Y-Y-Yes…" Darn it. How did the situation turned into this?
I couldn't understand the emotion running in his green orbs as he smiled at me. Before I could even avoid his mouth, I was already rooted on the ground when he dipped down towards me and gave me a quick peck on the lips before stepping out of the lift; allowing the doors to finally slide close. It didn't take me long to realized that he was actually blushing when I chanced upon the tips of his ears.
"Tak—"
Before the elevator doors could even completely slide close, he whirled around in order to look at me; his eyes filled with various emotions I couldn't even name. He was quick to step forward; pushing one hand between the door and quickly steps in. I was extra anxious on what he would do when he hit the closed button; preventing other passengers from entering the lift in order to get to their respected floors.
When Takumi finally turned to me—when we are finally safe inside the private confines of the lift—his eyes were smoldering… intense… penetrating. For a moment, there was danger in his eyes that I couldn't help but take a step back; giving him the space that he needed because I didn't know what he was planning to do. One thing I learned about Usui Takumi is that he is unpredictable.
"U-Um—?" I asked stupidly as I met his burning gaze.
He didn't let me finish because the next thing I know was that we are in one of those staring contest that we love the most and the next second is I was already getting pulled by him and into his arms; his lips enclosed in mine as he held me in a way I couldn't easily escape. I couldn't count how many kisses we're shared for the past few days but I still couldn't seem to get used with how intense his kisses were and how good it feels to be trapped in his strong arms.
His mouth caressed mine gently and I couldn't help but easily melt into his arms. I couldn't even remember when he managed to pushed me against the elevator walls but he did and when I did realized, I was too blissfully happy to care about the repercussions of what this kiss—and relationship—may present us in the future. My arms were around his neck as I clung onto him as though he was my lifeline. His arms, equally strong and hard, were wrapped around my waist as he partially lifts me up; our bodies pressed together not even a thin amount of air could pass through.
We were both breathing heavily when our lips parted. And even if he had already planted me back down on the floor, his arms remained around me as though he didn't want to let go—sharing the same sentiments as I do. He chuckled darkly, finally releasing me from his steel grip and pushes me out of the lift; but not before a quick peck on my lips.
"Let's continue this later."
My forehead creased. "Later?"
He nodded. "Movie night, remember? Sleepover? Your room?" When I flushed at the mention of my room, he chuckled once again. "I'm kidding. I won't do anything you don't like—unless you will be the first to initiate. But I was serious about the sleepover."
"E-Er, okay." He winked at me playfully and even if the elevator doors had already skidded into a stop, I remained on my post standing like an idiot; staring at the door blankly. But deep inside, I was mentally screaming what the heck just happened, Ayuzawa!
Violently shaking my head, I threw my bag over my shoulders while gripping the strap as though it was my lifeline. So many things have happened today that I could barely keep up. But one thing I'm certain of is that I have already accepted Usui Takumi's existence in my life. And there is no way I could turn back on it now. Setting what just recently happened aside and focusing on what I should be doing now with my life, I continued towards our dorm room and was about to round the corner when Kaon's petite figure appeared out of nowhere we almost bumped each other.
She seemed startled at first but was quick to collect herself as she looked down on me despite the fact that I was much taller than her. "Watch where you're going."
Whoa. She's certainly in a bad mood every day. "Sorry."
"Things would've been easier if everything can be forgiven through a simple apology." She muttered as she walked past me; her eyes spouting vitriol as though she was ready to strike me down had it been possible.
And I couldn't take it anymore. Annoyed, I whirled around to face her, ready to know the root cause of her anger of me. "What is your problem? Honestly, tell me. Because I couldn't seem to understand where this deep-rooted anger is coming from. When we first met you were so nice. What happened to that girl now I used to consider as a friend."
Kaon rolled her eyes at that. But her expression, despite the sarcasm was full of obvious anger and contempt. "Maybe that girl doesn't want to be your friend since you're the type to steal their man."
Ugh! So this is about Usui Takumi! Heavens! "Umekoji-san, I didn't steal anything from you and you know that!"
"Are you sure?" I was momentarily stunned by the amount of certainty in her voice. And the way she said things made it look like I truly stole something from her—or basing from her initial response, someone. "Have you really forgotten it?"
My forehead creased at that. "W-What are you talking about?"
"A lot of things. Ever since the beginning, Ayuzawa-san, it really is in your nature and bloodline to steal things that are not yours to begin with." I couldn't help but back away from her when she inched forward me; both her eyes and stance menacing like a predator ready to pounce on me any time she was ready. "Didn't your grandmother do the same back then—stealing somebody else's property?"
"What are you—"
"You don't remember? Funny, since you're doing the exact thing now. Would you like to remember things again? What your family did to ruin mine—"
"Misaki."
I jumped upon hearing Shizuko's voice somewhere behind me. When I whirled to check where she's coming from, it was as though I was brought back to reality again without me realizing I actually got dragged out of it. Shaking my head violently to get some of my senses back, I turned to her completely. "H-Hey. Sorry, I was talking with Umekoji-san."
"Do you have business with Ayuzawa, Umekoji?" Shizuko asks sternly; her eyes narrowed and sharp. "Or are you looking for another fight again?" Kaon actually rolled her eyes at us and, with a shake of her head, walks ahead of us and disappears in a corner. When Shizuko and I are finally left to our own devices, she appeared next to me with that trademark frown on her face. "That woman really creeps the hell out of me. Something's off about her."
I ended up scowling at her before pointing out myself; reminding her of the difference between Umekoji and I. "Really?"
Staring at me from head to toe, she squares her shoulders in obvious nonchalance. "Let's go back to the room. It's freezing in here. Had you not come in right away, I would've hauled your ass back in here."
"Why?"
"Nothing. I just don't want you to get in trouble for flirting around with Usui whenever you two can."
I couldn't help but blush beet red as we walk side-by-side back to our room. "Trust me, I'm really trying my best to be as… appropriate in the public as much as I could. Blame your cousin."
"What are you planning to do about Gerard's invitation?"
Her question brought back disturbing future. "I'm not sure. Takumi said I should wear a dress?"
And just like what her cousin did, Shizuko started circling around me as though I was shark food while giving me the head to toe. "Yeah, definitely wear a dress. Blue. With long sleeves." After a brief examination of my face, she reached out for a handful of my hair and gathers them all on one side; allowing a few strands to hang loosely around my face. "It would be nice if you'd tie your hair like this. You've got a pretty neck."
"Ugh. Could you not do the same thing Usui did? It's unsettling."
"Huh. He must really like you then—if he did the same thing, I mean." She says as she walks ahead of me to our dorm. "Let's go. Last I heard, we have movie night later."
"But what about the dinner? I don't want to appear like a slapdash in front of your family tomorrow."
In a very rare moment, Shizuko laughs. "Don't worry. I'm sure you can just charm them into thinking that your attire is fancy."
"Shizuko!"
.
The movie night didn't go as planned.
Before I could even realize what's happening, Sakura had thrown me my coat as she and Shizuko drags me out of the dorm and into the fire exit. We went to several secret doors and check the dark hallways before we finally managed to cheat our way out of the dormitory and into Takumi's waiting car behind the building.
"What is happening?" I asked them as soon as we are safe(?) and warm inside the vehicle. "I thought we're all watching movies tonight—and do a sleepover?"
"Let's do something risky instead." Yukimura says before running off to Kanou's waiting car so they can drive off ahead of us.
I turned to Takumi as he revved the engine back to life and carefully drives out of the lot. "This change of plan is very sudden."
"Blame Kaga." He says with a shrug and drives off to follow Yuki and Kanou-kun. "She suddenly said that she wanted to go out tonight for some fresh air.
I turned to Shizuko next who was sandwiched in between Sakura and Hideki-kun. "Well?"
"Come on. I'm not going to let you and Usui fool around in the bedroom after movie night." My eyes narrowed at the unnecessary emphasis. "I'd rather freeze to death outside than listen to you too. I'd kill you if you get pregnant out of wedlock—and at high school."
"Thanks, Shizuko, for the very profound explanation." I ignored them as they snickered at me from the backseat and did my best to focus on the road—with Usui also snickering as though he also found something funny over what Shizuko said.
I scowled at him. "Not funny."
"It is. And Shizuko lacks faith on me too much. It isn't like I'm not going to take responsibility."
"Stop!" I nearly screamed as all four of them actually cracked up. I shot Usui with a deadly glare; yet my ears are toasty warm like crazy. "Not funny."
"Sorry, love." But I was still frowning as he didn't sound the least bit apologetic. And to my utter embarrassment, he got my hand presses the back of my palm to his cool lips. "Sorry."
Ugh, I can't take this anymore. When I didn't respond, he laughs again. But not until after squeezing my hand tight before letting it go. And I was confused again when I notice that we are not exiting on the main gate of the University. I was quick to turn to the others. "This is not the front gate."
"Yeah. We're stowing away on the other gate. If we use the front gate, they won't let any of us out."
"I really don't want to get in trouble, guys. Trouble student, remember?"
"Don't worry." Hideki says good-naturedly. "We won't report you to the Authorities."
I couldn't help but heave out a defeated sigh as the rest of them laughed again. This was not the night that I've planned for my weekend. And here I thought I'd be locked inside the warm confines of my bedroom. It didn't take us a long time to reach our destination due to Takumi's maniac driving while complaining of having to drive his car instead of his expensive bike. The destination was a small cabin located miles away from the back of the University.
I was quick to jump off his car and watch as Kanou-kaichou and Yuki rushed inside to open the porch lights. There was a small porch up front with a Mayan hammock that can sit two people. Behind it were the glass French doors leading probably to the kitchen area. The sound of running water can be heard nearby indicating a stream. Around us were virgin and seemingly unexplored vegetation. The cold December wind blew on us gently and I couldn't help but shiver since I'm wearing nothing but my thick pajamas and winter coat.
"It's colder inside." Takumi, who appeared out of nowhere, says beside me as he grabbed my hand and enclosed it with his warm gloved ones. And when he notice that I was still shivering, he unfolded the thick, wool blanket he was holding with his other free hand and wraps it around me. "There. You look like you're freezing to death."
"But I am, you idiot." I hissed and allow him to drag me inside the cabin as the rest of them rush in too.
The inside of the cabin was much more humble than the outside with a huge fireplace which Yuki and Kanou are tending. The place indicated that it hasn't been used for a long time due to the building dust on the white sheets covering the minimalist furniture.
"Generator's not working." Hideki, who came from the basement along with Aoi, says as they worked on lighting gas lamps instead. "No wonder the porch lights won't open."
"Not a surprise since we haven't been here for almost a year." It was Shizuko as she removed the sheets of the small couch and tosses it on the floor. "What's the plan? We can still clean this place. I brought a vacuum."
"Yeah but there's no electricity." Sakura pointed out sardonically.
Shizuko rolled her eyes. "I know that, stupid. It's battery-operated. Hideki, can you go get it in Takumi's car?"
"On it."
It took us half an hour to actually fix the entire place. And when we're all set, I was surprised when they started setting up their sleeping bags around the fire place. I was confused for a moment until I realized that I brought nothing but myself. I scowled at Shizuko. "You never told me to bring a sleeping bag. Are you expecting me to sleep on the floor?"
She stared at me from head to toe with her cold, calculating eyes before her gaze went past my shoulder. "Takumi, did you bring a sleeping bag for your girlfriend?"
Glancing at Takumi's direction, I was momentarily stunned to realize he seemed confused as well. "Should I? I thought she knows."
"That's really great, guys." I told them sardonically and marches on the couch, vehemently dusting it off with dirt and dust so I can settle there while holding on to Takumi's wool blanket. Since he has a sleeping bag, I guess he wouldn't mind if I used his blanket so I wouldn't die in this freezing cold.
Takumi actually had the nerve to laugh at me before he settled his sleeping bag right next to my spot. "I was kidding. I brought a sleeping bag that fits two people. You'll be sharing this with me."
My response was almost automatic. "No way."
"Don't be such a wuss. Come on." I gasped when he suddenly grab me by the elbow and down to the sleeping bag so we could sit side-by-side of each other.
"Take responsibility." Shizuko tells Usui as Hideki and Aoi snickers silently.
"Stop that." I shushed her and covers myself with the wool blanket, suddenly feeling conscious. "Did you honestly think I'd do something as repulsive as doing that in front of my friends?"
Right next to me, Takumi had the nerve to arch an eyebrow. "We won't?"
"Stop." He laughs at the threat on my voice and raises both hands as if to concede. Staring elsewhere, I watch as Kanou-kaichou and Yuki brought in a small cooler and throws each of us canned drinks. "Er, what's this?"
"It's non-alcoholic, don't worry. We may love breaking out of school sometimes but strictly no drinking while underage." Kanou-kun reassures me with a smile. "It's just something to warm you up."
"We haven't done this in a long time." Yuki says while smiling. "And this is also Sakura and Misaki's first time to be here, isn't it? Last time we came here was last year."
"What exactly is this place?"
"An old cabin that Gerard owns." Takumi says while playing with the fabric of his blanket. "He was an alumnus of this University and since our family is a major benefactor of this University, they built this cabin as a tribute for the Walker family and their gracious donations to University."
My forehead creased as I turned to him; confused. "Walker? What's that?"
"My mother's family name." he says with a shrug.
Once again, I was confused. "I thought your surname is Usui?"
"It is. That's the last name of my grandparents from my father's side."
"I don't…" from the corner of my eyes, I caught a glimpse of Aoi signaling me about something I couldn't quite understand. I arched an eyebrow at him as he continued to send me signals and, after a moment, finally understood what he meant. Crap… I turned to Usui again, wondering how I should proceed with my questions.
Now that I remember it, Usui was the illegitimate child of his mother to another man. I stole another glance at Shizuko and the others, asking for help but they were all suddenly busy either playing with their blankets or reading the health information on the cans they were holding.
What the hell…
I turned to Usui again; wondering if I should push through with my questions and thought of other ways to question him. His face was unreadable and dark as his gaze was focus intensely on the wool blanket.
I sighed before gently elbowing him on his sides. Snapping out of his reverie, he turned to me, eyebrows scrunched together. "Yes?"
I shrugged. If he won't speak, then we have other ways to communicate. You were saying?
Takumi froze for a moment before he actually chuckled darkly and leans back on the couch behind us. You have secrets you don't want everyone else to know and I have them as well. I was the illegitimate son of my mother who was having an illegal affair with my father.
And although I was already aware of such thing, hearing it come from him still didn't fail to surprise me—to knock the breath painfully out of my lungs. "Oh…"
He shot a quick glance on my direction before he chuckled darkly; not minding that I actually voiced out my reaction. "Were you surprise?"
I nodded. "I didn't…" I had to cut myself since I didn't want to lie to him that I didn't know his current circumstance. "I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything." He says with a casual shrug. But to be fair with what you did for me, I will answer all of your questions.
I was quick to shake my head. There is no way I would force out painful answers from him just because I was curious.
Takumi smiled softly and gently pats the tip of my nose with his point finger. You're not going to hurt me by asking questions everybody has been asking me for a long time now. It's fine. And if there's a person I'd want to share these secrets with, it will be with you.
Ugh. How could I decline it when he says it like that? Darn it but nobody can resist Usui Takumi once he finally turns the charm on! And because I couldn't resist him, I ended up asking the question I'm curious about the most. "So, where's your biological father?"
He contemplated for a moment; the two of us unaware of the eyes on us—and the wave of silent surprise that engulfed the rest of our group—before shrugging. "I'm not sure. My mother's father separated the two of them as soon as they learned of her pregnancy with me."
"What does he do?"
"He was my mother's butler."
Once again, I was stunned. Butler? As in the butler? "Aren't butlers supposed to work for the rich people?" when he simply stared at me, I couldn't help but stare back at him—and to the rest of the people I was with. In the end, I couldn't help but ask the inevitable question. "Just who are you people?"
It was Aoi who responded to that. "Takumi and Gerard's mother was the only daughter of a British aristocrat."
If I had been drinking, I would have ended up choking in my own bile. "Excuse me?!"
Aoi had rolled his eyes at me. "Okay, I'll explain to you the hierarchy. Patricia is the wife of the next in line to the throne which makes her a Princess—she would have been the Queen. Gerard, Takumi and Maria would succeed their parents once Edward—Gerard and Maria's legitimate brother—decides to abdicate to pass on the throne to the next generation."
"Y-You mean…" I did the mental calculations as I stared at Usui Takumi with his striking blonde hair and blue eyes. He stared back at me, his eyes equally amused while his lips were in a lopsided grin. "—you're a royal?"
He squared his shoulders as though my question held no importance to him. "I'm the illegitimate son of a royal, yes."
"Your boyfriend's a Duke, stupid." Shizuko says while scowling at Usui and I. "Whether he's illegitimate or not, no one can question that a Princess gave birth to him—and that he was legally adopted by the Walkers."
There was a huge thud on the floor. Right next to Yuki, Sakura had fainted dead.
.
No wonder his brother's going to be worried about his private life. Usui Takumi is a frickin' Duke! How could I not know this all along?!
I pace around the parking lot restlessly while the rest of them gathered the stuff that we've used for our impromptu sleepover at Gerard's cabin. Nothing much was discussed last night since they've all decided to turn in early. Yet, it wasn't the first time I was unable to sleep because of the enigma that was Usui Takumi.
I nearly jumped out of my skin when Shizuko slammed the door of the backseat shut after taking her back and other stuff. My forehead creased. "What are you doing?"
"We'll be riding with Yuki and Kanou." She says noncommittally.
"All of you? You won't fit in there."
"That's not your problem anymore. Just enjoy your time with your royal boyfriend."
I wanted to retaliate to that but had stopped midway when Takumi appeared out of nowhere carrying our stuff and made his way to the car. He place our stuff on the backseat and opens the door for me; motioning me to get inside.
I didn't bother to complain since I was quite certain my protests will just go unheard. The drive back to school property was quiet and awkward. I didn't want to open my mouth because I was afraid I'd only end up saying something stupid. But my mind was filled with nothing but Usui Takumi and his royal family—and how his family would probably react once they get to find out that we are—ugh—dating.
The reminder of the impending dinner set of my panic alarm as I quickly turn to him. "I think it would be best if I opt out of the dinner. I remembered that I have to cram this project—"
Takumi turned to me, eyes equally intense and bored, as he maneuvered the wheels. "Seriously, if this is about last night, Kaga and the others are exaggerating. Before someone becomes Duke—or gain a royal title—they have to undergo several ceremonies first which, by the way, hasn't happened to me once. I'm illegitimate. There's no way they'd want someone like me with a title."
I had to disagree to that. "If they certainly think that way, why would conversation about your future fiancée even rise up? Your family certainly has plans for you."
Takumi shrugged; clearly, he wasn't taking this conversation seriously. "They'll be in for a huge disappointment."
Ugh. Why is he so…?! I didn't bother to finish the question and focuses on the road ahead of us instead, trying to admire the almost white background as it blurs past us. When the bell tower came into view, I turned to him again; unable to settle with the silence. "I still don't have a dress for the dinner, by the way. You said I should wear blue."
Takumi laughed. "Shizuko will do something about it. But I suggest not making yourself too pretty. My family might think that you're making yourself deliberately appealing for me."
"Well, I don't mind showing up at your family's dinner in jeans, you know." When he laughed, I went on. "Well, I need to make sure the impression on me is, at least, good. I mean, if I showed up there looking like a woman with loose morals, what would your mother think?!"
He chuckled darkly as he carefully parked the car on the lot and turns off the car's engine. "You don't really need to focus on what will be my mother's impression on you. It should be Gerard and my grandfather that you should be more worried about."
My forehead creased at that. "What do you mean? Won't your mother be in attendance?"
He shrugged as he got our stuff from the backseat, hands over my bag and ushers me out of the car. "No. She won't be in attendance tonight."
"Why? Is she sick? Not in the country? So, I won't be meeting her then?"
"Yeah. I don't think it's possible for you to meet her." I jump off the car and waited for him as he rounded the hood. When he realized that I won't be letting it off anytime, he sighed. "I'll let you meet her someday. But not tonight."
"Why is that? Is she okay? Is she sick?"
"No. She's in a better place now." He darted a quick glance on me—as though he was contemplating something—before she shrugged and walks me to the elevator; signaling that it's time to part. "My mother died giving birth to me… that's why she won't be in attendance tonight… and all the other nights."
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Hey guys! Terribly sorry for the extremely late upload. _ I will try to finish the next chapter as soon as I can—it's in the works now, btw—and upload it as early as next week (I hope. But don't rely on me too much on that.) I hope you like the new chapter and well, we have four more chapters left, I think?
Yey! It's almost the end, I hope! Hope you guys are happy.
-TGP