"Sakura?"
"Sensei." She bowed to him as he walked through the door of the Hokage's office. She clutched onto the papers pressed into her chest as she looked back up to him. Shikamaru stood next to her as his entrance interrupted their discussion. The men nodded to each other wordlessly as Kakashi leaned onto his desk looking at the two in front of him. His arms folded as he began to speak.
"Proceed,"
"I analysed the results of the tests on Akari." She held out the report and he took it with a single hand and flipped it open. He scanned the contents finding Sakura's perfectly neat handwriting covering the front page. "I immediately noticed the immense amount of Chakra she had but I wasn't sure of the affect it would have on her body. After the few tests I ran I realised that she is suffering from it. Much like Naruto did with the Nine-tails chakra. The force is too immense and it is killing her." Sakura's voice remained even and professional as she relayed the information. Kakashi could feel Shikamaru's gaze burning through him but his eyes remained on the document at hand. It wasn't anything more than he had learned from Akari not half an hour ago.
"You don't seem surprised," Shikamaru spoke after a short silence.
"Akari just told me as much," he sighed closing the paper folder. He extended it back to Sakura who took it reluctantly and Kakashi finally looked up to the pair. They looked at him expectantly.
"She's has only a few weeks unless we find a way to slow it down." Sakura tone morphed into something determined.
"She told me that the Otsutsuki side of her was suppressed most of her life due to a seal placed on her. Once that was broken the suppressed power that came with it is now destroying her if she remains on this plain. The human side of her cant contain it." He resisted rubbing his face and stared at the two of them.
"Is she unable to return to a plain which she can remain unharmed?" Sakura asked.
"Honestly, I'm not sure. She seems certain that she is staying in this plain. She claims to have 'found peace' with it."
"I don't understand why she is willing to die to be here." Sakura's face morphed into confusion at the notion.
"She wants to protect Konoha she claims. It is where her loyalties lie." Kakashi didn't want to admit that he felt defensive about it. He needed to be the Hokage. Not some love sick 23 year old.
"And you believe her?" Shikmaru probed.
"I would believe it from the Akari I once knew. Now, I'm not so sure. I don't know this Akari." It was an honest answer.
"From the analysis, I don't know how she is still functioning. Most people would be bed ridden from the pain alone. I think it was from the pain that she collapsed previously." Sakura sighed and began scanning the documents in her hand. Kakashi didn't want to think of Akari being in pain and he pushed it down and crossed his arms tighter.
"What do we do about this?" Shikamaru asked Kakashi what he planned to do out of courtesy.
"Monitor her as we originally planned. We will need to get Ino and see if we can extract and relay her memories so we can gather information. It will be the cleanest way to get proof of her intentions too. If everything proves OK we can take her word as truth with anything else she says."
Kakashi spent the next few days denying himself of any thoughts of Akari. He began the process of trying to separate the current Akari from the one in his past. He has inundated himself with work and actually managed to clear his desk for the first time in perhaps ever?
The door to the office creaked open without a knock. He had sensed the intruder long ago and tried to continue working but found it impossible knowing she approached. There was only one person that wouldn't knock before entering the office. Hell, even Naruto knocks.
He couldn't deny himself any longer and found his eyes reluctantly slipping to her form in the doorway.
"You look more like Akari," he found the words falling from his mouth amazed at the difference in her colouring. Her almost white skin had returned to the warm tone and the familiar lilac now radiated from her hair. His heart faltered at the sight of it. Everything felt even more real. All the time he spent the last few days trying to separate the people in his head came undone all at once.
"It seems the potency of the Otsutsuki is fading as my mother predicted. I can feel myself changing quicker this time. I barely noticed before but now, I feel everything much more strongly." He didn't reply to her, instead he stared at the document on his desk as if it would give him an answer to a question he didn't understand.
"You're avoiding me?" her voice, even void of emotion, soothed him like honey.
"Hokage," he pointed to himself and reminded her of his title along with the responsibilities that comes with it without looking up from the forms he was filling out at his desk.
"Why?" she spoke simply, not conveying the gravity of the situation. She didn't beat around the bush and his dismissal of her claim was transparent to her. He tried not to breathe deeply as her scent swirled around him lulling him into a false sense of reality. He swallowed hard reminding himself of everything that had transpired. He felt the blood in his veins ignite as she turned to leave.
"I thought you were dead. You died." A cold edge to his words disguised the true feelings overwhelming him beneath. He found himself looking up to her as she approached his desk.
"But I didn't, I'm here." She turned back and the blank face and neutral tone she always had was starting to piss him off.
"For how long?" he snorted rhetorically as he leaned back crossing his arms in front of him conveying his annoyance.
"You thought I had died, and it seems you grieved me deeply. Yet, here I am alive, and now you do not wish for me to be so?" she answered anyway.
"You presume an awful lot," he said darkly lowering his gaze to her.
"You're angry that I am here, are you not?" She asked plainly as if it was simple. He didn't have an answer but he was angry and he found himself rilled enough to divulge what he'd locked away. He just couldn't place the source of his anger. "I didn't mean to hurt you," her voice suddenly softened and he almost flinched.
"Do you have any idea what it is like to live knowing you took the life from the one you love?" he looked at her with wide angry eyes until he realised, "Loved," he corrected.
"You needed to live, Kakashi," she tilted her head to the side, the emotion that should've etched in her face was still no where to be found. His hands shook from the elevated anger as he clenched them to his sides.
"I needed you!" he found the words launching from his chest without hesitation. He hadn't realised it until they were already spilled but he couldn't find the regret he thought he would've felt. She stood in silence staring at him blankly for almost too long before finally responding.
"I was never meant to exist, never meant to have met you." She shook her head side to side as if shaking thoughts from her head. The building rage blinded Kakashi to the motion.
"Nothing can change fate right? Who are you to claim that you were not meant to exist? You do exist, you did meet me. You gave me your life, I didn't want it Akari, I would've given my life over and over to know you survived. The shadow of your death has clung onto me since. The weight of it was unbearable, and now you're here. Alive and in front of me." His voice was raised and he was suddenly towering over her leaning halfway across the desk. His eyes widened in realisation and he took a step back. He looked away from her and sighed releasing what was left of the dissipating anger. He could see her standing in stillness from the corner of his eye. He knew she wouldn't reply. Knew there wasn't anything to say.
"Why not just give us the information and then leave? What is the point in staying and dying?" His voice reflected his exhaustion as he managed to bring his gaze to meet hers. She didn't answer for what felt like an hour. Her face blank. She just held his stare intensely.
"I wanted to spend the last of my time near you," Kakashi did nothing but falter at her words. He replayed them instantly in his head checking if he had misheard her. Time itself felt like it crashed into his head. He couldn't respond immediately, the shock from her words clouded his mind. His wide eyes dragged to the window, unable to process the information looking at her. The sunset before him didn't even enter his mind as the gears turned. He mentally shook himself out of the daze he slipped into.
"You're dying, I wont allow myself to be close to you." He couldn't look to her as he spoke. Instead he stared at nothing out the window. He wouldn't allow the inevitable to hurt him more than he'd already hurt. "I'm too tired. I can't go through it again. Please don't make me." Is it your sole purpose to destroy me?
"I would not ask so much of you, but I know you wouldn't be destroyed by so little." He waited as she hesitated with her next words. "The burdens that shackled themselves to you have proved heavy. It seems the weight has crippled you. I don't wish to add to them. I will remain at a distance, if that is what you wish. You only need to say the words."
"Whatever transpired between us is in the past needs to remain there, it was a lifetime ago. We are different people now and I'm the Hokage. Honestly, I'm not sure if I can even trust you as an ally to Konoha. I don't know why we're even having this conversation. I suggest you remain professional if you intend on staying here. Don't come to me for personal matters." He stood in disbelief at his own words but he knew his logic was correct. Everything he said was for the best as the colours of sunset danced across the village before him. He couldn't bring himself to look towards her. He couldn't even hear her breathing until she finally spoke.
"Understood, Hokage-sama."
He watched the colours morph as her light footfalls disappeared from his office. A strange weight shifted in his chest and he refused to acknowledge the discomfort.
A few days later…
Akari had kept her word and hadn't disturbed Kakashi since the meeting in his office. He found himself thankful that he could almost pretend she'd never returned. Shikamaru had only mentioned her once as the meeting with Ino had been arranged around her other responsibilities. He knew Ino had a high workload between her families business, the development of the sensory network and their new born child and couldn't help feeling a little guilty for pilling more work on her. But, she was surpassing her father in their abilities and needed her for this.
He found himself with a free evening as he wandered through the streets of Konoha. It was rare that he had time like this and he'd forgotten how exactly to spend it. The sun had set not long ago as the sound of nightlife began. Bars and restaurants seemed to be overflowing as Kakashi moved through the small crowds.
People seemed to dive out of his way and bowed to him. He bowed back to as many as he could and found little peace in his evening walk. He would henge himself if he ever found the opportunity again.
He began to admire the development of the village between the greetings and found that he felt almost alienated from the modern peace that engulfed Konoha. He felt like a war relic that was no longer needed. He didn't know whether to feel achieved at the feeling or discontent.
After a while he realised where he stood. He owed it to him to tell him. The thought of him stumbling upon her without warning was almost too much to imagine. He couldn't put an old man through that.
"Taiyo-san," he greeted the busy restaurant owner after dipping under the curtain in the doorway. A wide eyed older man whizzed around to where Kakashi stood.
"Hokage-sama!" Taiyo exclaimed. "It's an honour to have you in my establishment," he bowed deeply but Kakashi could tell his back didn't approve by the stiff posture and cracking sound.
"Maa maa, Taiyo-san," he rubbed his neck and waved away the formality, "no need for that, I'm here as an old friend." The older man smiled up to the familiarity.
"Would you like a private booth or to eat at the bar, Lord 6th?" Kakashi wanted to sigh at the title.
"Would you join me in the booth? Or are you busy?" Kakashi shifted uncomfortably in his Hokage robes. He wasn't sure if he would ever feel normal in them. He felt slightly ridiculous. Taiyo looked over to the open kitchen to see the other chefs managing with the workload for now.
"I can spare myself for our Hokage," Taiyo smiled and his wrinkles deepened. The familiarity of the older man brought back strangely fond memories. He had avoided him more than he'd like to admit over the years and felt suddenly guilty knowing he'd lost Akari too.
Taiyo had asked Kakashi for his order before they slipped into the booth. They sat for a long moment at Kakashi looked onto Taiyo. He seemed thrilled to have the company and Kakashi didn't know where to start.
"I'm not sure how to tell you this." Kakashi managed to hold the gaze of the older gentleman as his warm smile seemed to slip from his features. "Ame is alive and in Konoha."
A strange silence passed painful as Taiyo-san sat unresponsive. The older man didn't so much as blink at the news as if he were frozen in time.
"She has been back for a few days. I just thought I should tell you in case she came here or you saw her in the street." Kakashi spoke again after some time had passed but the older man didn't so much as breathe.
Kakashi found himself unable to look at him anymore and found a waitress bringing his food over to them. He wasn't sure if he had it in him to eat anymore.
The clink of the plate hitting the table seemed to disrupt Taiyo from his daze.
"Is this some sort of joke?" Kakashi could hear his voice wobble and made himself look at him directly.
"It's real." He shook his head indicating it wasn't a joke. "She's really alive and here." Kakashi flinched as Taiyo was suddenly standing and his palms his the table causing his cutlery to fall from his plate at the force.
"Tell me where she is," he could see his arms trembling at he leaned over to Kakashi.
"I don't know where she is at the moment, but I can tell her you wish to see her." Kakashi couldn't just divulge her accommodation but also knew the desperation in Taiyo. He watched the old mans eyes grow wider. He found he couldn't look away until he turned and stormed out of the restaurant.
Kakashi sighed and felt his shoulders sag briefly before following Taiyo outside.
"You can't just search the whole village for her," Kakashi projected his voice along the busied street but Taiyo stormed on ahead surprising him at his pace for such an older man.
"Are you going to stop me?" He didn't look back to the Hokage. Kakashi didn't need to think but tried to justify why he would. He began to contemplate the hurt he would feel to see how much she has changed. To see how indifferent she is to everyone from her past.
"No, but she's changed Taiyo-san," he saw Taiyo falter in his determined steps and slowed to a stop. "I can see where she is, but, the Ame we knew has gone." He knew he was being harsh but he couldn't have Taiyo believing the person they once knew still existed.
"She's still Ame. She was a daughter to me. You might not understand but no matter who she is now she'll always be family to me. She will always have me. Even if you've given up on her." It was Kakashi's turn to flinch at the harshness. Taiyo's words seemed to pierce something in his chest but he denied it.
"She's been here for a days, and she's not come to see you." Taiyo turned to him then.
"You're giving up on her, you might be OK with that but I'm not. She could've been alone all this time without friends and family."
"You don't know what she's like now."
"Neither do you. Has she told you she is indifferent?" Taiyo's defence of her began to eat at Kakashi. The guilt that lay in his stomach began to wake up. Had he really given up on her? Kakashi had no words.
"I wouldn't have believed her even if she had anyway," Taiyo-san left Kakashi standing alone in the street as people moved around him and began searching the Village for Akari.
Kakashi gave a signal to his personal anbu guard and he dropped next to him immediately.
"Where is she?"
"Training ground 4, Lord 6th."
He didn't rush over, rather he strolled there with much effort whilst he contemplated their interactions since she reappeared. Taiyo-san might have been right. He has given up on her twice.
He heard her before he could see her. It was obvious that she was training. He felt the earth shaking beneath him but he continued forward. His Anbu guard slipped down along with the anbu surveying her.
"It isn't safe beyond this point, Hokage-sama. Her training may harm you."
"Don't doubt her, she knows I'm here." Kakashi sighed looking past his guard. He could tell they hesitated but eventually nodded. "Give us privacy."
"Hokage-sama," they all dispersed and he knew they wouldn't listen in.
He continued walking forward leisurely without suppressing his Chakra. The trembling beneath his feet subsided and she dropped behind him more suddenly than he could contemplate. He couldn't help the smirk that stretched at his face.
"Not many can sneak up on the Hokage and those who could wouldn't dare." Kakashi didn't turn to her as he felt her walking closer towards him.
"It seems your senses have dulled if you didn't feel the earthquakes, Taichou." He couldn't ignore the amusement held in her voice. The way his title fell from her lips altered something within him. "I guess I should call you Hokage-sama, now." Her voice came directly behind him now and he turned slowly to her. She wore her full chainmail like she used to but wore only her bandages under it and shorts over it. He swallowed at the sight of her. Her ivory skin was glazed with sweat from her training and her long unbound lilac hair blew in the gentle breeze. Sunlight danced between the canopy over her and her silver eyes seemed molten as she smirked up to him. All of a sudden he forgot he wasn't in his 20s and no time had passed between them. He didn't realise moments passed and his own smirk had long since dropped from his lips.
"Is there something I can do for you, Hokage-sama?" she asked as her face returned to neutral. He cleared his throat lightly as he returned to himself. He couldn't look away from her and nerves seemed to swim through his limbs.
"Did you hear the meeting was arranged with Ino-san?" he willed himself to speak in his usual bored tone but watched as her eyes narrowed.
"I did," she nodded singularly.
"I spent a long time wondering what it would be like if I ever saw you again," he didn't really know how to say what he meant. "I didn't think it would be like this," his chest began to feel heavy bit it wasn't a bad feeling. She was physically back to what she looked like before she had left and he found himself unable to separate the two of them. He watched as the wind played with her long hair and the emotion had somewhat returned to her features. He couldn't look away from her eyes. "I can't seem to believe this is real," he murmured looking deeper at her. His hand absentmindedly reached out, craving the feeling of her cheek but he caught himself as she looked to it and he froze midair. Kakashi clenched the outstretched hand and brought it back to his side.
"I didn't think I would ever make it back," she looked back to his face but something hung in her gaze that he couldn't place. It felt dark and void of hope.
"If I had known there was any chance of you surviving, I would have looked for you."
"I know," he watched a sad smile pull at her features and his chest reacted. The air around them seemed to grow heavier.
"I'm not giving up on you again, despite everything, I can't just let you die. I wont." He only realised it as he spoke, but he found he meant every word of it. She sighed in protest but he could see the exhaustion pulling at her features.
"It isn't possible. My mother tried to convince me to use an Otsutsuki technique to transfer myself into someone else but I refuse." Kakashi didn't know what she meant but assumed it was unknown to them. He'd need to question her further about it in the meeting but he found he couldn't think like that at that moment.
"I wont stop. Not this time." He vowed.
"Kashi…" she flinched as if she had caught herself. He felt his eyes flare momentarily at the sound of his name on her lips. His whole being seemed to ignite at the familiarity. He suddenly felt a strange sensation, one he didn't think he'd feel again. She tore her eyes from him and found the floor. "I didn't come here to reignite an old flame." Her words stung him more than he wanted to admit.
"Then why are you here? Really?"
"I meant it, I really did come to protect Konoha as best as I can, but as I said in your office… I felt like I needed to see you again before my body gives out." He watched her shoulders sag and he wanted to repress the things her words did to him. "I wanted to leave knowing that everything would be OK here, that you were happy and living a full life."
"You expected that to be possible without you?" he couldn't help the annoyance that raced through him.
"Yes," she said weakly looking up to him. "I had hoped you had found peace and happiness. I think you have."
"In some aspects, I agree." He found his fingertips extending to her hand. The strange electricity shot through his arm at the contact of her skin. Their gazes were locked as he brought it carefully to his masked mouth. His lips lightly brushed over her fingertips, the sensation halting too soon before he released her hand from his grasp. She only continued to return his gaze as breathing began to feel harder. His body demanded something more. The heat between them seemed to rage as her chest seemed to heave as his did.
The moment broke as she cried through clenched teeth and keeled over. Her arms wrapped around herself tightly as panic burned through Kakashi.
"Akari?!" he had stepped through the space between them and his hands wrapped around her biceps keeping her upright.
"I'm fine," he couldn't ignore how weak she sounded. She attempted to stand upright and her vacant eyes seemed to search for his face until she keeled over again as a wave of pain sliced through her.
"Akari, tell me what to do." His eyes were wild and frantic scanning her for anything that would tell him what hurt her.
"There's nothing." She wheezed through clenched teeth. "Rest," she couldn't say anymore than that. Kakashi's heart raced almost painfully, beating against his ribs. He ignored how his limbs threatened to tremble as he scooped her up into his arms. "No hospital," her words faded as she crumpled like a rag doll in his arms. He watched her eyes flutter shut and he found himself sprinting through the forest.