Izuku traced the back of his teeth with his tongue. He felt the tip of one of Kacchan's canines, tall and sharp. Normally, he'd feel stubby ones worn down and misshapen from years of grinding his teeth at night. Nervous. Always nervous. Kacchan had nice teeth for someone who seemed so reckless. He imagined Kacchan's mom wrestling her son into brushing his teeth as a child and smiled to himself. Should he have done that? Just wrestled the stubborn idiot to the ground and forced him? If they had had to touch fingers or ears or knees he would have. Izuku yawned involuntarily, tongue stiff in his mouth. He had to pee.
"Midoriya-kun?"
Izuku snapped his head up. "Yeah, hm, what?" he asked quickly.
"I asked you two if you're ready to go over some conditions," Aizawa-sensei said, repeating Izuku's yawn.
"Yeah! Yeah, sorry. Didn't get much sleep," Izuku spoke softly, embarrassed and still unused to hearing Kacchan's voice speak his words. He shuffled in his seat, trying to get comfortable in the wooden chair seated across from Aizawa-sensei's desk. Peeking left, he saw himself with a sleepy gaze and half-hearted glare. Kacchan and him were both still in their clothes from the previous night. He looked at the clock on the wall. 6:10 AM. Aizawa-sensei had requested they come to his office before the start of lessons to go over the "rules" of living in each other's bodies. The first thing they were asked to do when they arrived was lick their fingers and touch them together to rule that out as a possibility of switching back. After it failed, Aizawa-sensei spent some time making notes before resuming their talk.
"I would imagine so." Aizawa-sensei reached into his desk and pulled out three packs of paper, stapled at the corners, and three pens. He slid one of both to each of his students. "Hopefully going over some ground rules will help you both to be more comfortable with the situation."
The packet in front of Izuku was titled "Bakugou and Midoriya's Switched Bodies Guidelines". He turned the page and saw the header: "Must Allow".
"Let's start with the things that you two will need to be okay with the other doing while in your body in order for them to actually live their life. Some of these may seem obvious, but we're doing this to make sure that what is consented to is clear," Aizawa-sensei started, opening his own packet. "You must allow each other to attend classes and participate in training, including quirk training. You must allow the other to speak to teachers and classmates. You must allow each other to perform basic hygienic tasks, meaning: changing clothes, using the restroom, bathing, brushing teeth. You must lend your clothes to the other. You must allow the other to itch and adjust body parts as needed."
Kacchan breathed a hard breath through his nose. He looked at the paper like he wanted to set it on fire but kept silent.
"Do you both agree to those conditions?"
Izuku voiced his approval and Kacchan nodded stiffly.
"Alright then, moving on." Aizawa-sensei turned the page and his students diligently followed suit. "There are also things that we, meaning the faculty at U.A. who are aware of the situation, prohibit you from doing under any circumstances, even if you both consent. I do not believe that either of you would behave in this manner, but, again, we want everything to be clear and in writing." He yawned and smacked his lips before continuing. "You must not: purposefully hurt the body you're currently in, use the quirk you now have without the supervision of a U.A. faculty member unless given express permission by myself, commit any crimes, try to assume the other's identity, record your voice, take pictures or videos of the body you're in, engage in any form of sexual intercourse, or start new romantic or sexual relationships."
With every prohibited action that his sensei rattled off, Izuku's stomach grew tighter and tighter. He couldn't help but think about the women who fell victim to the body switchings. Aizawa-sensei was right. Neither him nor Kacchan would ever do any of those things. He hadn't even thought up most of those possibilities when he previously tried to empathize with the women. Guilt flamed over being so upset over his situation with Kacchan, someone he ultimately trusted. Things could have been so much worse for all of them. What if that man hadn't recognized them? Izuku's biggest worry with the switch was being disrespectful to Kacchan. Never did he have any fear of what would happen to his own body. He was lucky. Pictures, videos, recordings… it would all be so easy if he wanted to.
"Any objections?" Aizawa asked lazily.
The boys shook their heads.
"Alright then. Finally, and most importantly, we came up with two subjects we thought we should leave up to you two to decide what you're okay with. These are lifestyle items that we don't feel comfortable completely barring you from. This is also where you should mention anything that you'd like the other to do, or not do, in order to upkeep your body. So, let's start with object one: physical contact. I need you both to choose what level of physical contact you allow the other to have with their current relationships. Think of a scale from high-fiving to cuddling or kissing and decide where you draw the line."
Izuku put an elbow on the desk in front of him and pressed his face into Kacchan's splayed hand. This was too much for him. Never in his life had he had any purposeful influence over what Kacchan did, even when he wanted to, and he didn't plan on starting now. He couldn't imagine himself or Kacchan kissing or cuddling anyone even in their own bodies. But if the guy was hiding that kind of relationship then he didn't want to interfere with his happiness.
"He can do whatever he wants," Izuku muttered into his hand.
"Okay, please mark that on your paper there. Bakugou-kun?
He grunted.
"I really need a vocal answer for these ones."
"It's fucking fine I don't give a shit what he does." Kacchan still glared sleepily into space, anger directed toward the universe that allowed them to be in the situation they were in.
"Alright. Mark that on your paper and we'll move on. Object two: masturbation."
BWAM.
Izuku jumped and looked over to see his fluffy green head pressed to the desk. He winced in sympathetic pain, realizing that Kacchan had slammed it down into the wood. Red ears peeked through his frizzy hair.
Izuku would have laughed if he didn't want to do the same himself. He had barely had a talk from his mother about masturbation. 'Izuku, sweetie, do you know about, um… relieving-'. 'YES, yes, Mom, I do.' 'Oh thank goodness.' Then he didn't exactly have many friends through his school career so that had been the extent of his conversation on the matter. Aizawa-sensei was the last person he expected to talk about this with and Kacchan was the last person he'd want to talk about it with. Yet here they were.
"This is a yes or no," Aizawa-sensei continued, unfazed. "Will you allow the other to masturbate while in your body? We request you stick to purely hand-to-penis contact to avoid any complications or damage to your bodies."
"Oh my god," Izuku muttered, burying his lava-hot face into his hands. "Sensei, please, do we have to talk about this?" He was nearly whining with Kacchan's voice.
"I highly recommend you do," he responded calmly. "It will make things easier for you both in the long run. So, your answers?"
Izuku sighed into his hands. "Again, he can do whatever he wants." If Kacchan could get it up while in the body of his least favorite person, then he deserved it.
"Alright then. Bakugou-kun?"
Silence. Izuku may have been able to hear the sound of his body's poor teeth grinding, tectonic plates moving from stress. 'Please don't say yes,' Izuku thought.
"Bakugou-kun. Please answer the-"
"Whatever. Fuck. I don't care."
"Is that a yes or-"
"Fucking christ, yes, he can fucking jerk off shut the fuck up."
"Thank you." Aizawa-sensei marked his page emotionlessly. "Now, are there any specific rules either of you have for the other?"
Silence. Izuku shook his head.
"Alright. We're done here then. Please sign on the line at the end of your papers and keep them for reference. Class doesn't start for another half hour or so. I'd recommend you use this time to go over anything you didn't feel comfortable speaking about in front of me. For today, I will excuse you two from wearing your uniforms but you must wear them from tomorrow onward. You're free to go."
"Thank God," Izuku breathed as he stood from his chair and went to the door as quickly as possible. He held the door open for Kacchan, but when he looked back he hadn't moved his head from the desk. Izuku glanced to Aizawa-sensei who waved him out of the room. The door shut behind him and he walked to his classroom, hoping to get a nap in before anyone else got there. He entered the classroom, slumped down in his seat and closed his eyes.
But how could he go to sleep after that? He leaned his head back and pressed Kacchan's rough hands to his face, screaming internally. Why did Kacchan agree to everything so easily? What was the faculty expecting them to do that would "damage" each other's bodies while masturbating? Why couldn't he remove images of those things from his brain? Why was assisted suicide illegal?
He had to pee so bad. He'd had to pee since he woke up as Kacchan but refused to go to the bathroom. The guy himself gave him permission now, but he still didn't want to. He didn't want to be able to go to the bathroom as Kacchan, he didn't want to be able to change clothes as Kacchan, he didn't want to be able to freaking jerk off as Kacchan. It all felt so weird—so wrong. To Kacchan, was going through all of this really better than briefly touching their tongues together? They both seemed equally distressed over the meeting and Kacchan had even stayed after with Aizawa-sensei. Why? What were they talking about? Izuku hoped that Kacchan was having second thoughts. He hoped that Kirishima had been right—that the stubborn idiot would cave from the stress before this could go too far.
Fuck he had to pee.
He clenched his fists, banged them on the desk and stood up. He walked stiffly out of the room and towards the bathroom. At some point, his bladder would burst, so he'd rather go now, when no one would be in any of the bathrooms, than later, when he'd have company, or worse, have to use a urinal. Izuku stopped when he reached the door to the bathrooms. Leaden feet, it was hard to take another step. He took a deep breath. And another. And another. He shook his head furiously and then slapped his hands to his cheeks. One step. And another. And another. A hand on the door. He pushed and walked in, the door swinging shut behind him. Empty and clean, the bathroom smelled of soap. Izuku looked at himself in the mirror for the first time since swapping. He was Kacchan, alright. He understood why Yaoyorozu had been so freaked out by his look of worry. Kacchan's face with big, pleading eyes and a brow that was wrinkled with nervousness and not rage made Izuku's heart skip a beat. He'd never seen that expression on him and, after the next three months, probably never would again. The thought could have kept him staring at the mirror for hours but he looked to the stalls. The palms of his hands stung when fingernails dug into them. One step. And another. And another. He opened a stall. He looked to the toilet and swallowed. He shut the door behind him. Silently praying that Kacchan wouldn't somehow remember all of his actions after they switched back, Izuku pulled down Kacchan's gym shorts. Underneath were black boxer briefs, damp with stress sweat. Izuku took a breath and looked forward. Slowly, he hooked his thumbs beneath the waistband and pulled them down, feeling the fabric peel from his skin. He shuddered as the cool air of the bathroom engulfed him. Carefully, he sat down, parting his legs so that everything could unstick from his thighs. He sighed a breath of relief at the comfort that only increased as he finally began to urinate. An unintentional moan came from his throat as he leaned his head back, so incredibly glad that no one was in there with him. It felt like the stream lasted for a solid minute before it finally let up. Sweet relief. He stood and pulled Kacchan's underwear and shorts back up, not caring about getting the last drops of urine. No one would know since he was wearing basketball shorts and he would deal with the hygiene aspect of everything once he managed to tackle showering. Baby steps. He opened the stall door and headed to the sinks when the bathroom door swung open.
Izuku's own body came in through the door, something that the boy didn't think he'd ever get used to. Izuku felt his ears burn.
Kacchan looked at Izuku. "Did you just…" He gestured to the stalls.
"Uh, yeah. Are you about to…"
"Yeah."
They were both silent, staring anywhere but into each other's eyes.
"Well," Izuku started nervously, "literally nothing in my life has prepared me for what to say in this situation so I'm just gonna go back to washing my hands if that's cool." He turned around and turned on the faucet, cold water gushing forth. As he began to wash his hands he could see through the mirror that Kacchan hadn't moved.
"Hey, Deku."
"Hm, yeah?" Izuku tried not to sound as nervous as he was.
"I'm not fucking trying to make things hard for you."
Surprised, Izuku looked over his shoulder at Kacchan who was still refusing to meet his gaze.
"Y-yeah, Kacchan, I know. I'm not going to say I understand why you're so adamant on this, but I know you wouldn't live in my body for three months without a really good reason."
"You fucking got that right," Kacchan muttered as he walked into one of the stalls.
"Kacchan?" Izuku called after a pause.
"What?" he responded curtly.
"Um… If you ever have to use a urinal, you need to pull my foreskin back or stuff will go literally everywhere. It's not a good time." Izuku turned off the faucet and shook the water off of his hands, heart pounding in his chest as he listened to the passing silence. He looked to the stalls for a beat before he headed out, jumping when a response came.
"Pull mine forward."
Izuku looked at the stall again. "Gotcha," he replied, leaving the bathroom just as he heard Kacchan begin to urinate. The door swung shut behind him and he faintly heard the sound of his own voice moaning in relief.