Hurt Locker

Chapter Twelve- Old Times

Mac could barely move when he woke up. But he was immediately soothed by the pair of brown eyes staring down at him. She jolted away after a moment and though he wanted to move with her, his body wouldn't allow it. His arms were sore and muscles tired not to mention the dull ache in his ribs. He never wanted to move from that bed but Mason and his plans forced him up.

"Easy," Riley said. She helped sit up slowly against the pillows.

"Mason, I know what he's planning." Mac said.

Riley looked startled by his own frantic expression. He could tell she was just as tired, he wondered if she had gotten any sleep without him but lives were at stake.

"There's a major meeting tomorrow. The who's who of the criminal underworld are coming together to sell weapons and form alliances. It's like a criminal conference. He's going to kill them all." Mac said. "He was building a bomb."

"Why did he need the hardrive then?" The stupid thing she'd almost lost her life for.

"It was a sorta invitation. He couldn't get in unless he leveraged something."

Riley was confused, "So he wants to take out a bunch of criminals, doesn't that make our job easier?"

"Even criminals deserve a chance to a fair trial. Besides, Mason doesn't care about collateral damage. I saw the components for that bomb, it's unstable, it won't be a contained blast."

Riley swallowed. "So where is it?"

"I didn't catch that part, some hotel, Mason is keeping it close to his vest." Mac said.

"Maybe we can find it. The space would need to be big, but inconspicuous. Let's see how many low traffic hotel reservations were made for tomorrow. If I dig into the backgrounds of the people who made the reservations and flag any criminal past maybe we can pinpoint where they're meeting."

"What if they use fake names," Mac said.

Riley rolled her eyes, "Do you have that little faith in me." She sat up against the headboard next to him and opened her rig. He watched her fingers as they typed in her password and was stunned when he realized what it was. Holy hell. He looked up at her face and found nothing had changed, she didn't even know.

"How did you remember your password by the way?" he asked, hoping he came off nonchalant.

She looked away from the screen for a moment and shrugged. "I didn't really. My fingers just knew what to do. Instinctively."

A smile broke out on his face. And he didn't know if he should tell her that her password was his birthday. It lightened his chest to know that even if she didn't realize, she was always thinking about him.

"Why are you smiling like that?" she said, when he looked up she was staring at him and he realized he was still grinning like a fool. His smile shrunk as he shook his head. "Nothing,"

He cleared his throat and looked away. She eyed him suspiciously then returned to her work. Mac's grin returned; he had missed hearing her talk like that. Missed seeing her ultra-focus, slender fingers typing away. It was like old times. There was something very Riley about her right now.

She typed in the parameters for the software to flag, then let it run. The two were staring at the screen for a minute undisturbed.

"How long will this take?" Mac asked.

Riley scoffed, "More than a minute Mac." Now it really was like old times, Mac thought.

Silence fell over them and it was torture with so much to be said between them. Mac couldn't pretend for much longer. He gathered strength from the ends of the earth to lift his arms and touch Riley's face. She was next to him, finally. When he was in the basement he thought it had been a sick joke his subconscious was playing. But he really had heard her voice and felt her warm touch.

"You're here," he said, hoarsely.

She shook him off, "What if Desi comes back and see? Bozer is right next door. I don't think now is the time."

"I guess staying with Aubrey was good for you." His eyes darkened and he knew he was coming off as bitter as he felt.

"It's not like that with Aubrey Mac. I guess I just wanted to get a reaction out of you. I'm sorry." she said.

"I'm the one that should be apologizing. For the rest of my life I'm going to be sorry Riley. For everything, the fall and keeping you in the dark...and not realizing how you felt earlier." he said. He waited for a response that never came.

"Why did you come, it's dangerous." he said.

"What do you mean? You were in danger, why wouldn't I?" she said, trying for a smile but he still looked like a parent scolding her.

She nibbled nervously on her bottom lip, "It's always been dangerous. Why is it a problem now?"

He clenched his jaw and she really didn't think he should be expelling so much energy when he had been hanging to dear life just hours ago. But she couldn't placate his anger and tell the truth at the same time. "It's a problem because I almost lost you."

"I've been hurt on the job before, at the wedding with the toxin."

"You remember that?" he said, surprised.

"I'm remember a lot." she said, though she doesn't tell him what had sparked all those memories. Only memories right before her fall evaded her and she didn't think she wanted to remember that harrowing experience.

"It's different."

"Why?" she pressed. He reached for her hand and she felt his rough skin against hers. She let go and reached for her hand lotion on the nightstand and began moisturizing his dry skin. He was looking at her the entire time, like he forgot they were having a conversation. When she was done, he finally spoke again.

"That first night in the hospital. You didn't know who I was. You looked at me like a stranger. I can't tell you what that felt like, Riles."

She didn't like where the conversation had taken a turn to. She didn't want to have the same conversation again. Didn't want her hopes let down again. This was far enough.

"You should rest," she said, getting up from the bed for her rig.

"Is that all you have to say?" Mac couldn't help but notice the irony. It was just like before, she was pulling away from him because he'd been too stupid not to strike the iron while it was still hot.

"You asked me how I could love Desi so recklessly? Easy, because she's not you. Because you're not somebody I can afford to lose. I rushed into things with Desi and we crashed and burn. How could I do that with you? Do you not know how much you mean to me?"

His eyes bored into the side of her face but she refused to look at him.

"Stop," she said. She got up from the bed and began pacing, like she couldn't stand being near to him. Her own words from the park rang in his head. Mac now knew she wasn't avoiding him because of something he did. She avoided him because she was afraid of what she might do.

"Why?"

"Because it's torture. The push and the pull…that only ends in me being disappointed. It seems inevitable that I never get what I want."

"And what do you want Riles?" He eased himself up from the bed to follow her. It hurt like hell, and he was only able to make it a few steps. She rounded the bed to put him back into bed, but he just held on to her arms for support, adamant that he was not going to get back into bed until she answered.

"You know what I want Mac." she said.

"Then you have it," he said. She froze and squeezed her eyes shut as if none of it were real.

He squeezed her arm tighter, "I said you have it."

His senses began to swirl, like they had that day at the park and again on his deck. The rest of the world paled and only Riley was in colour. He wouldn't let her get away again, consequences be damned. She shifted nervously under his gaze. He swept a light hand across her shoulder, down her arm and along her shape to rest at her hip. She shivered and he had barely touched her. He wanted to change that, needed to change that but a loud beeping noise from the rig startled them apart. Her software was finished but Mac wanted to fling it across the room for the interruption.

"Found it," Riley said. "I'll get the others," she rushed passed him. Mac flinched. So close but still out of his grasp. Mac knew the next he chance he got to kiss Riley he wouldn't be able to stop. That was a promise.