A/N: Written for Hermione's Hideaway Fest for the Hermione's Haven FB group. No beta except for Grammarly, so all mistakes are mine.

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Pairing: Hermione/Severus

Rating: M

Summary: Hermione convinces Severus to spend Christmas Eve with the grandmother he hasn't seen in forty years.

The Angel and the Harridan

Christmas Eve, 2009

Landing sharply, Severus grunted and pulled Hermione tighter into his side. Simultaneously, they dropped the Portkey, an old, moth-eaten mitten, to the snow-dusted earth below them. The wind swept off the North Atlantic and Severus inhaled deeply, it was a fresh, clean scent he'd always loved, even if he hated where he was now. He stiffened as he turned to face the city behind them.

"It'll be fine," Hermione assured him for perhaps the fifteenth time that day.

"I'm sure it will," Severus said with a conviction he did not feel. Hermione wasn't fooled though, she patted his arm reassuringly, and they began the trek to his grandmother's house along the Long Walk in Galway, Ireland, near the docks. The colorful houses were beautiful, even in the dead of winter, with snow dusting the tops of the houses, it was a lovely place. The grey sea, roiling angrily probably had something to do with that. Severus had always loved the sea. Manchester, land-locked as it was, was at least near enough to Liverpool that his mother had taken him a few times. She'd taken him to his grandmother's in Galway even fewer times.

"She'll be fine," Hermione said again. This time Severus detected nerves in her voice and he snorted under his breath. His grandmother was rarely fine. She was a mean old thing and spiteful to boot.

"You don't even know her," Severus reminded her dryly. Why had Hermione insisted on this insanity again? Severus had lived so many years without his grandmother in his life, he didn't need to go complicating things now.

"No, but she's your last living relative, Severus," Hermione said seriously, pausing and looking up at him with those doe eyes that Severus found he couldn't resist giving in to, for anything. He suspected Hermione knew that too, which is why she gave him the look so often. And the guilt at Hermione's own relatives, while being alive and well, had no idea they had a daughter on the other side of the world. He sighed and nodded as he guided them further along the path. His grandmother's house was nestled between two muggle homes in the middle of the Long Dock. Despite Galway being a sizable city, it was still Ireland, which made it rather small even compared to Manchester, let alone London where he and Hermione had taken up residence. It was almost quaint.

His grandmother's house looked the same as it had the last time he was there, almost forty years ago now. He had actually been surprised to find out that the old woman was still alive. The old, bitter resentment from when both of his parents died when he was sixteen and his grandmother hadn't even bothered to send him an owl swept through him, but he tamped it down for Hermione's sake. She wanted to spend holidays with family, even if he'd told her it was a terrible idea and that his family had always been full of terrible people. Hermione wouldn't take no for an answer once she'd found out that his grandmother was still living.

Severus hadn't told her about his grandmother's uncaring inaction when his parents died. He found that he often kept the most painful parts of his life away from her. He loved Hermione. He had for the last three years they'd been married, but she somehow seemed too pure to burden with the crap-shoot that had been his life. Hermione seemed to calm as they approached the house, she'd wrapped up a gift for his grandmother and had it tucked under her arm. It was a calm-blue rowhouse, but Severus knew it looked smaller on the outside than it was on the inside.

The door-knocker, a fierce-looking hawk, eyed them suspiciously. Severus definitely remembered that. It had bitten his mother's hand the last time she had taken him here. His grandmother had refused to treat it. More bitter resentment roiled through him and Severus found himself swallowing it all back down again. He still had no idea why he was subjecting himself to this.

Hermione knocked smartly on the door, without using the knocker.

"Hey lassie, that's what I'm for!" the knocker shouted at her. Hermione flinched but otherwise ignored the knocker. "And don't think I don't remember who you are," the knocker sneered in Severus's direction. Severus sneered back at it but kept his mouth shut. He wasn't about to get into an argument with a door knocker of all things.

The door opened slowly and a small house-elf dressed in a tiny butlers uniform stood there. "May I help you?" the house elf's diction was perfect and he eyed them both with disdain.

"It's Severus, Tootle," Severus said to the house-elf.

"I do not know a Severus," Tootle said. "My mistress is not receiving callers today."

Severus rolled his eyes and pushed his way past the tiny creature.

"Severus!" Hermione hissed from behind him, but he ignored her and grabbed her hand, yanking her forward before the door knocker or Tootle could slam the door in her face.

"Grandmother!" Severus shouted as he headed into the sitting room to the left of the front door. "I've come for a visit!"

"Severus!" Hermione whispered. "No need to be so rude! We should have waited to be invited in!"

His grandmother was predictably sitting in her chair before the fireplace in the sitting room. Her iron-grey hair piled on top of her head in an impeccably.

"Severus." Her voice sounded as if she'd swallowed gravel. "What a surprise." She sounded neither surprised nor happy that he was here.

"Grandmother," Severus said. Finally, the old witch stood from her chair and turned to face them.

"And you brought a witch. You're married I assume?" She used her cane to cross the space and stand before them. Even standing almost a head taller than her, Severus felt like the nine-year-old boy he had been the last time he'd seen her.

"Hermione Snape," Hermione said, holding her hand out for his grandmother. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Prince."

"Charmed," his grandmother said, not taking Hermione's hand. "And how long have you been married? Couldn't invite an old woman to your wedding?" She addressed the last bit to Severus.

Severus sighed. "We didn't invite anyone to the wedding, Grandmother."

"Pah, how plebeian. An elopement."

Hermione opened her mouth to say something, but Severus tightened his hand around hers in warning.

"Mrs. Prince, I brought you a gift. You have a lovely Christmas tree," Hermione said, mentioning the towering pine in the corner of the room.

"Oh, well, let's see what it is then." His grandmother grabbed the box from Hermione, rather rudely in Severus's opinion, but Hermione smiled sweetly at the older woman.

She unwrapped the gift quickly, throwing the paper to the floor, which disappeared the moment it touched the floor, courtesy of Tootle, who was hovering about the door. Severus noticed that his grandmother had not invited them to sit or ordered tea. He sighed, very quietly, so that neither woman would hear, but they both appeared to have done so as his grandmother glared at him and Hermione tightened her hand around his own.

Grandmother tore the box open and inside was a Christmas tree-topper, an angel to be precise. He raised his eyes. When had Hermione picked that out?

"It was my own grandmother's," Hermione said quietly. Severus squeezed her hand once more, this time in support.

"Oh, and isn't it a lovely angel. Just like you, my dear," his grandmother said, a soft smile on her face. Severus had never seen her look anything other than severe and disapproving, and here she was bestowing an almost fond look on Hermione. "Put it on top of the tree, would you, Severus?" She handed him the angel without looking at him. The moment he let go of Hermione's hand, his grandmother swept her along to sit before the fire and called for tea from Tootle.

Despite the cold treatment he was getting, Severus thought this was going much better than it had any right to. He did as his grandmother bade and placed the angel on top of her tree.

"Doesn't that look lovely?" Grandmother smiled encouragingly at Hermione. Hermione smiled beatifically back.

"Your tree was already very pretty, Mrs. Prince" Hermione said. "The angel looks perfect atop it."

"Indeed it does, child. And I insist you call me Helen, all my friends do. Now, tell me, how did you come to be married to such a sullen boy like Severus?" She cast Severus a baleful glare and Severus stifled a sigh. It was going to be a long afternoon.

Several hours, insults, and a meal later, and his grandmother was pressing for them to stay the night to celebrate the holiday properly the next day.

"We couldn't impose," Hermione said kindly.

For a moment, Severus thought that they were going to get out of the obligation. That Hermione would work her charming magic on his grandmother and they'd be free to return home.

"Pah, nonsense. I insist! It's Christmas, a time for family. You're the only family I have left." His hopes were crushed. He didn't miss the way that his grandmother had decided Hermione was the only family she had left. Hadn't said a word about him. Unless it was to insult him.

"Come," his grandmother said. "I've had Tootle make up a guest room for you."

Hermione bestowed him with a small kiss on the cheek and a grin as they followed his grandmother up the stairs to the second floor. There were five closed doors on the second floor, and Grandmother turned to the one on the left side of the stairs. She opened it and gestured them inside. Hermione stepped in, but then Grandmother blocked his entrance.

"This room is for Hermione, Severus. Your room is down the hall." She pointed vaguely in the opposite direction.

Severus narrowed his eyes at her. "Hermione is my wife, madam. I shall stay in the same room as her."

Grandmother whirled on him and pointed her finger into his chest as he glared down at her. "Not in my house you won't!"

"Helen, please," Hermione said. "I have nightmares, and not having Severus with me, would probably only increase them. I wouldn't want to disturb your sleep."

Severus folded his arms across his chest and glared some more. This was the absolute last time he was subjected himself to this awful woman.

"Pah, fine. Bathroom's next door," his grandmother grumbled as she hobbled out of the room and down the hall. "But no hanky-panky!" she called over her shoulder.

Severus shuddered. He was quite sure that he wouldn't be able to even get hard being in this harridan's house.

"Well," Hermione smiled at him. "She's a bit of a handful."

"A bit! She's a harpy," Severus grumbled as he began loosening his cravat. Hermione stepped close and began pushing buttons through their holes of his frock coat.

"She's probably lonely, Severus," Hermione said kindly.

"You think good of everyone," Severus complained as she pushed the coat from his shoulders and began attacking his vest and his shirt beneath. It turned out that he had been wrong about the erection. His cock began stirring with interest as his wife continued to undress him.

"She said no hanky-panky," Hermione hummed, brushing her hand down his cock. Severus huffed a breath. His cock twitched, wanting to be touched again.

"I haven't listened to anything she's said in the last forty-nine years, not that it's been much, why would I start now?" He wrapped his arms around her waist and placed an insistent kiss on her lips. It appeared Hermione didn't care about listening to his grandmother either as she hurriedly stripped out of her own clothes. Severus let the rest of his drop to the floor before pressing Hermione back to the sumptuous sleigh bed that dominated the room. It creaked and groaned horrifically.

"Merlin," Hermione muttered. She pulled away with wide, horrified eyes.

"Accio, wand," Severus said, holding his hand out. His wand wiggled its way free of the arm holster buried in his shirt on the floor and landed in his hand. He cast a silencing spell at the bed, the floorboards, the walls, the door, and ceiling.

"I think that's plenty," Hermione said.

Then Severus cast one last spell, a locking charm combined with a ward to repel anyone from entering the room.

"There," he rumbled and bent to kiss Hermione again.

Despite the silencing spells, the bed groaned some, but not nearly as loud as it had. Severus applied himself to making both him and Hermione forget about the crone down the hall.

Later that night, Severus decided that if he had to visit his grandmother each year, at least he had Hermione there to be the balm his soul and ego needed. He gasped as her lips finally closed around his hardened cock. Pushing his hands through Hermione's hair he kept his hips as still as he could, while she did her best to make him call out for release. Yes, if this was the treatment he received, he'd happily do this every year.