quick trigger warning: suicide*
Marko filed in, taking off his boots , gloves, and jacket before flopping onto the bed across the end.
"Are you going to tell me or should I start guessing what timeline our story takes place in?" I asked turning in Dwayne's arms.
"I'll give you a hint," he said, the cheshire grin melting over his face, "I'll make you famous."
"You didn't."
"I did and I am," he chuckled, stretching, much like a cat would.
"Bullshit, there's no way,"
"If David was a musketeer and Dwayne was a chief of a tribe, why can't I be Billy the Kid?"
"Because that's A: pretty well know, piece of American history and B: requires some kind of unique detail to get me to believe that," my eyebrow couldn't help but raise in disbelief.
"Well think back, how far do you 'remember'?"
"Far enough if I try hard enough I hope," and with a silent push of breath, I pushed as far back as I could in attempts to trigger a 'memory'.
My first memory of my life with Marko wasn't what I thought it'd be. I guess I expected sometime aside from growing up with Miss Rosie. If I remembered correctly, the older woman was maybe thirty-two when she took me in. I could be mistake but I think was about 1867 when she found me. I was maybe five or six at that point.
I never understood what was going on or how Miss Rosie took care of me and the other girls. Yes, other girls. It was a girl's home but not a home for girls if you know what I mean. I was about always the youngest, and consequently and honestly the most naive.
Miss Rosie knew that and did her best to protect me. It's just that she couldn't be with me everywhere. Instead of working the same job as the other girls, Miss Rosie treated me more like a personal messenger. She sent me just about everywhere in town that she could get away with. I was sixteen when I first met him.
I had two bags of goods to be taken to Miss Rosie. She'd sent me out to retrieve tobacco, tea, and other products of similar use. Being the naive and frankly careless young teenager I was, I never looked where I was going. In our mostly quiet trade town, you had no need to look, you could just go. I, at the time, hadn't known any better.
Regardless of the busy streets that day, I'd stepped off the walk and began to head across the street. Bad decision, there was a reason people needed to look before crossing streetways. I didn't notice though. I was just minding my own business and then with a thump, I was rolling in the dust. Then a pressure on top of me. The air seemed to be knocked out of my lungs, and I laid in the ground wheezing.
"You alright miss?" At least a dozen footsteps in tow.
"Billy what the hell do you think you're doing?"
"Not now Dick, I want to make sure the girl's still breathin' first," the sun shone in my eyes as they rolled me over.
A hand came to my wrist and two fingers to my neck.
"What the hell are you doing Doc?"
"Looking for a pulse, Billy might've crushed her to death, with how tight her corset already is it wouldn't be surprising," the hands were warm and the sun was soon blocked from view.
"You're a poet, not a doctor," a new voice snorted, "acting like you can feel her heart beatin' in her neck. You know you can only hear her heartbeat through her breasts."
"Just because you're a pervert pendejo, doesn't mean Doc is,"
"You better watch it you Mexican greaser,"
"Hey! Now watch your language you two," the first voice hollered over the last two.
"Hey now angel, come on back to me," the arms around the back of my shoulder patted my face lightly.
I didn't understand but I sucked in a large breath and choked while the surrounding voices cheered. Upon opening my eyes, my corset had been significantly loosened. I was practically indecent in public!
Six faces soon came into view but the one that had caught my attention was the one that had the sun shining like a halo behind golden curls.
His face was fairly tan from the Arizona sun but his olive green eyes stuck out like a tree in the desert.
"Why howdy there Miss," he puffed, quite frankly out of breath," any chance you would be available 'morrow evenin'?"
"Christ Billy," a dark hair man muttered, his accent placing him as a northeastern yankee.
"If you can help me get my bags together I just might be," I gasped out as I sat up. I wasn't quite indecent but the lack of security of my corset was wearing me weary.
"Why of course Miss, Charlie if you would please," and the surrounding faces seemed to dissipate as I was helped up from the ground.
I swept my hands over the edges of my black dress, trying my hardest to remove the dirt from my person. Reaching back, I pulled the strings of my corset tight and retied it to the best of my abilities. I turned my head up to face the six men. The black hair yankee stood toward the back, the watchman. A man with equally dirty face and hair, definitely not the ring leader. A dark haired man, kind face, and start of a beard with broken skin over his knuckles; a pugilist. A Mexican, Native American man from his clothes and jewelry; the muscle perhaps? A blonde with intense blue eyes and glasses in his front pocket; the poet? And the last one, still right in front of me. Shoulder length golden curls, intense olive eyes, lips that looked sinfully soft. Of course the ring leader looks the most innocent.
"Do you do that to all the women you have interest in?" I asked as I snatched the grocery bags from the pugilist.
"Only the ones I think are worth a damn Miss," he started with a crooked smile,"My name's Billy. This here's Dick, Dirty Steve, Charlie, Chavez, and Doc."
"Pleasure to meet you ma'am," the yankee said while the rest sounded off with their own individual greetings.
"Pleasure's mine. It was nice meeting you fellas and I appreciate the saving y'all did just now but I really need to return to Miss Rosie," I replied as I turned to leave.
"Miss Rosie's out by the Amigo?" Billy's voice rang.
"That'd be the one," and with that I went to leave.
"Wait a minute," he called again," what's your name?"
"Calista."
I hadn't seen hair or hide of those boys for almost a year. The seasons might've stayed hot down here but I counted every day that passed.
It wasn't until one day a knock came upon our door. Not like the usual knocks we'd get; this one had a pattern to it. Dum dum da dum dum da dum. An unrecognizable look passed Ms. Rosie's face; she spun towards me in a hurry.
"Go grab the tea from the kitchen with at least 7 cups. And the whiskey, I don't know how bad this one is going to be."
I didn't understand but I hurried as fast as I could past all the crowding girls. They muttered and whispered all sorts of things.
"It's him again..."
"I knew he'd be back.."
"What happened to Pat?"
"Is Doc with them?"
Doc? Surely they weren't talking about Doc from that gang of men who stirred up trouble back in Lincoln? There was a gang within the last year, actually right after I'd met the gentleman who saved me from so long ago, that had made it their personal mission to take down Mr. Murphy and his ring of miscreants. We all heard it was because of the way he'd gotten rid of their boss John Tunstall. Unfortunately it meant a lot of people died, including their own original leader, Richard Brewer, and other members: Dirty Steve Stephens and Charles Hough.
After that, Ms. Rosie had moved us a town or two over. She said we could stay if we so chose but there was too much bad blood and it was ruining the business. Lincoln was never the same after the hell storm Billy the Kid brewed with his little band of outlaws. And the remaining members were possibly back?
I used all the patience I had as I swiftly moved through the sea of girls to return to Ms. Rosie with the items she asked for. The girls didn't want to move, they were all curious, trying to peak around the corner in their nightgowns. Luckily I hadn't prepared myself for bed yet and was still in the lovely emerald and black dress Ms. Rosie had gifted to me my last birthday.
As I rounded the corner I saw two familiar, distraught faces. Chavez and Doc. And then with his back to me, there he was. In all his outlaw glory; he wore dark blue pants, covered with black leather riding chaps, brown sun bleached boots, a dusty white top, and brown suspenders.
"If you'd set that down on the table beside the couch and pour me some tea please," Ms. Rosie's voice rung much softer than I'd ever heard it.
I set up her cup and began pouring each man a glass of bourbon. They looked like they'd needed it. One by one I handed each man a cup, even the kid who seemed younger than me. Each man thanking me almost silently. Without a word, I gave Billy his own drink.
His face contorted in confusion into realization. A Cheshire smile broke over his face despite the room taking on its own grave tension. It was like he ignored the conversation going on around him completely as he cupped my cheek with his free hand.
"I always dreamed I'd see your beautiful face again."
"Billy-" Ms. Rosie's voice came almost in an annoyed tone, "Don't you think your problem is a little more important here than my assistant?"
"Why Ms. Rosalie Woodworth, is that a twinge of jealousy I'm hearin' in your voice or is that the sound of the angels singin' to take me home?" The Cheshire smile never left his face.
"William H. Bonney, you better watch your tone with me before I throw you outta here flat on your ass,"
Billy hummed his Cheshire grin fading to a tight lipped smile.
"Rosalie, you know why I'm here. You know why they're here. So what do you say? I figured I might as well cut to the chase and avoid irritating you further," his hand slid down and around my waist to which I pulled from slightly to his apparent annoyance.
"You know my answer Bonney- Calista, you're no longer needed in this room," she said voice like ice, and with a muttering curtsy I excused myself quickly.
I had retired to bed myself rather than sit with the rest of the girls. It didn't occur to me just what Billy the Kid would've wanted from our Ms. Rosie that she wouldn't have been willing to give him with or without all his money. All the girls did glare at me throughout the day afterwards. Ms. Rosie didn't hardly talk to me that morning neither, until she'd called me to her 'office'.
When I arrived she'd already had tea made and set out for herself. And a young girl maybe seven stood by her side.
"Calista meet Fredia," she gestured to the small dark haired and eyed girl.
"Nice to meet you," I nodded politely to her as I turned my full attention back to Ms. Rosie.
"Fredia will be performing your tasks from now on. Dinner, cleaning, tea, laundry, and errand running; all her job now. You, little Miss Calista, have a new job," Ms. Rosie's smile pulled into a wide grin, "follow me if you would," she paused and turned to Fredia," I expect lunch within the hour darling."
And with that Ms. Rosie lead me from her unofficial office all the way to the girl's hall. It was the second story, the room right on the east end of the house, and subsequently where the roofing over the porch ended at an angle.
"This is your new room Calista. Here you'll be paying off the rest of your debt," she gestured to the room that was bare as the desert was dry. Aside from a bed and a dresser with a mirror of course.
"Paying off my debt?"
"Ah yes, see the years I've taken care of you, it wasn't for free dear, I'm going to need you to start taking care of some business for me,"
She wanted me to do her job. She wanted me to be one of her girls. She never stated it but I doubt she'd taken in another young girl to take my places so I could be her personal accountant in here and do her taxes.
"Ms. Rosie, my debt should've been repaid for all the service I'd done for you throughout the years,"
"Ah that, you were just doing as I asked and I fed you correct? I didn't charge you even though you know eating costs money. Call it an internship, now you're paying me back for all the food I fed you and the room in which you slept for so long," her smile was long gone now, instead she moved her hands to her hips in an defensive sort of way.
"Is this because of what Billy wanted?" I wished the words had never come from my mouth.
Ms. Rosie's whole demeanor changed and a dark look shadowed her features. She took a step toward me and gently wrapped a hand around my arm.
"What Billy the Kid wanted is none of your concern, seeing as how he'll never get it,"
"Well Ms. Rosie, it seems to have obviously had something to do with me,"
"It was nothi-"
"Did he want me to sleep with him? That wouldn't make sense if you said he wouldn't be getting what he wanted," I trailed off at the end to seeing Ms. Rosie glare at hard at me with crossed arms.
"No, he didn't want to sleep with you. He wanted-"
"To take me with him. He's not coming back here is he?"
"More or less and I don't know what his thing is for you but if it's what I think it is, then we'll just take care of that tonight," her arms dropped from the defensive stance she had before to the confidence I knew her for. A smirk tugging at the corner of her lips told me she thought she knew what she was doing.
I should've known after the way she treated me that nothing better could've happened after that. I was kept in the room for the rest of the day when two girls had come in without knocking. One was a dark haired girl and the other was blonde but not quite as much as I was.
Neither said much of a word to me while they curled and twisted my hair into intricate designs and applied layers of makeup to my face.
Afterward they pulled out the nicest dress I'd ever worn. It was a deep crimson red with black lace over the bodice. It was also the shortest dress I'd ever worn. The ends of the bussel stopped about mid thigh in the back. This was more of something Ms. Rosie would wear. This was right up her alley.
I said nothing as my hands were holding onto the bed post. The blonde stood beside me holding the back of the corset together while the brunette laced me up wordlessly. With every tug though I could feel her smile as I left out the tiny puffs of air I had in me. It felt like forever before I was done and all I could do was stare out my locked window.
The brunette left the room without a word when she was done tying me in. The blonde on the other hand wordlessly looked over my shoulder before fishing something from between her breasts.
She leaned in close, arms around me as if hugging me. She swiftly slipped the key between my breasts and whispered ever so softly," He said you'd know what to do with this."
She pulled back ever so slightly and nodded to the window. I understood but when?
"He also said to give you this," and she grabbed me by the jaw before planting the biggest kiss on me.
She let go and lead me to the vanity when we heard footsteps approaching down the hall. Not a hair or makeup brush was out of place. The brunette came in with a look of disdain but she carried oils and perfumes with her.
By the time the girls were done, I'd watch the soft Arizona sunset happen through the vanity mirror. Soon enough we had to light candles and lanterns around the room. Around that time is when both girls left wordlessly and pulled my door locked behind them with a sharp click.
It was obvious I wasn't getting out that way. It wasn't but an hour later that as I watched through my window that my door clicked open.
"Calista, sweetheart," Ms. Rosie's velvety voice rang through the room," your first costumer of the night is here."
My head whipped to the door at that. There in the door way she stood with a man behind her. He was a bit taller than Billy but definitely less built. His brown hair was swept up under his hat. He was young but not younger than me. He wore a look of confidence as he scanned over me.
"You weren't lyin' when you said she was a looker Rosie. Where you been hidin' her all this time?"
He moved swiftly into the room and circled me like a predator. I followed him with my eyes, not letting him out of sight or get too close.
"Show him a good time darling. And Dick? Don't break her, she's new," and with a laugh the door clicked shut behind us.
"New? You ain't never done this before darlin'?"
I shook my head, never letting a sound leave my mouth.
"Well how about this hun," he turned, taking a step towards me, "I'll do my best to go easy on ya," another step, much bigger than the last," and you can cry after I leave. How about that?" He laughed as he lurched forward and grabbed me by the arms.
He pulled me toward the bed, forcing me to sit at the edge facing him. A wisp of movement outside my window caught my attention. It had to have been Billy. Dick, kept pulling me to him, trying to kiss me and I struggled every bit of the way. Finally, I got my shot and I took it. I threw my knee up into his crotch and slid out from under him. I hurried to grab one the guns from the holster he hadn't taken off yet and pointed it at him.
"You're going to stay right there. If I even think you're coming after me, I'll shoot you where you stand," I made my way to the window where Billy waited.
Dick sat back and chuckled on the bed. His chuckles turned to cackles and I cocked the gun at him.
"Go ahead," he smiled as he stood," put a bullet in me."
I pulled the trigger with no hesitation, and he gun clicked. It was empty. Dick smiled as he pulled out a blade about as long from my wrist to my fingertips. As he began toward me a crash came from the other window in the room. A Molotov cocktail had came threw the window and smashed on the floor. Dick paused, surprised by the fire.
I pulled the key from my breasts and took it to the unbroken window as the fire began to spread. I heard a thump and Dick was making his way towards me. I panicked and threw the gun which hit him square in the head and threw him off long enough for me to get the window unlocked and open.
"Not so fast pretty girl, you're going to pay for that one," he pressed the knife to the top of my thigh as he pulled me back into the quickly smoking room.
"Let her go Dick, we know this is only going to end one way if you don't," Billy was now inside my room.
"Fine Billy. I'll let her go today but the next time I see you too. You're dead and the little minx is mine."
Billy glared at that as Dick let me go. I scrambled over to Billy's side as the room got smokier. Billy pulled his gun out, quick as lightning and shot Dick in the stomach.
"Like hell she will be," and he led me to the window, ducking out before me.
He helped me out the window and onto the tin roof. The silkiness of my dress didn't quite agree with the metal and I slid to the edge of the roof.
"Hold on honey," he winked at me and let go of my hands.
I let out a small shriek but was caught by two sets of hands, which belonged to two very familiar people.
"Doc? Chavez? By God's good name am I glad to see you two," I sighed as they set me down on the ground.
Billy came sliding off the roof next. The horses stay in the middle of the street as he grabbed my hand.
Screams filled the air as more of Ms. Rosie's caught on fire. Girls came flailing out the door, screaming in fear, some naked.
"Come on Angel, we don't have time to dilly dally around," Billy tugged me to and helped me into the back of his horse.
With a kick, he'd lead the gang into the night. And as I looked back, I saw Ms. Rosie's almost burnt to a crisp and a familiar blonde winking at me from the back of someone else's horse.
It didn't take us long after that to get along. Billy saved me from a life I knew I wouldn't have wanted. Billy and I stuck together like ink on paper. Everywhere he went he took me with him, and I was surprisingly never in danger.
Everywhere we went, if we were staying in town, Billy would send me in with money to rent a room. I was never too suspicious either, he always had me dressed to the nines when I went into inns. He called me his little gift from heaven, a true angel with just the talents he needed. And if you asked him I had many.
However in this case he was referring to my acting. I'd go in, act posh, order a room and room service. Then I'd go and open a window and in Billy would come. Just like the first night we made love. That was the night he saved me actually. It was romantic to a point, we had our own tent out under the stars. That was a beautiful night if I ever experienced one.
Speaking of experience, every time we'd go into town, we had the same plan. We'd spend a few days in town, I'd go around and into the bars with some of the guys and we would gamble and of course cheat into winning. Not every time though, that'd be suspicious. While we did that, causing a distraction with our presence, Billy would find himself and a few others mapping out the floors of banks and other easy to rob establishments. I can't say I felt too bad about what we were doing though. It wasn't like we were rich and stealing from the poor. We were just as poor as anyone else, living town to town and taking from the rich who inevitably were reimbursed by the law anyway.
You know. It seemed more recently to me that the law just kept causing trouble in my life. The law was always after Billy, since Tucson. That meant he had to sneak around, be extra careful, and for me ,personally, it meant that we could be together publicly. He couldn't take me out shopping during the day, he couldn't take me to eat, he couldn't hold my hand or escort me places. We couldn't get married, even if we wanted to. I mean sure he was always out watching me and protecting me if need be. I can't tell you how many times he pulled me back from getting run over. It happened more often than you'd think.
As a matter of fact, it's why I haven't left this hotel since it happened last except for his service. It's been three long, hot days out here in New Mexico territory. And here I was. And here he wasn't.
Three days ago it was the last day we were supposed to be in town. It was the day Billy and the boys usually pulled the heist.
I went about me usual un-suspicious business. I would go to the store and buy food, things to patch clothes, and whatever special items any of the guys asked for. But today Billy gave me a little extra money and told me to get myself a nice dress for us. He loved the color red on me, meaning he asked for me to get another. I hadn't had one since the night he took me away. Sure, I had certain items that were red but not a dress.
So I went into a clothing shop and spent a little too much time but I figured Billy wouldn't mind. I'd found what he wanted and even had a little extra to get him a matching red bolo tie.
I didn't realize though how much time had actually passed until I got outside. People were screaming as the boys ran out of the bank. They loaded up their bits and piece and mounted their horses with precision. Each one getting ready to leave. But that's when the law caught up. Pat Garrett and his self-selected sheriffs gang had caught us off guard.
There was a shoot out going on and I saw the youngest boy in the group at sixteen go down. Then James, and Franklin. Billy was no where to be seen but I saw Chavez take a hit that knocked him off his horse. He ran and hid though between buildings. He would get out. There were three left, not including Billy or myself. Then I saw Doc take a fall and I ran. Billy surely wouldn't last much longer if they took down Doc and Chavez.
I dropped the dress and Billy's gift as I ran toward the firefight. I guess all things usually end how they begin. With the same mistakes being made.
At the time though, I didn't realized. I didn't realize until I heard him call my name. I turn and there's Billy running at me like a bull. I'm confused but so relieved he's alright. I smile and slid to a stop in the dusty street. All the shouting and gunfire was drowned out by complete adrenaline.
He looked upset and he kept shouting at me but I didn't hear it. That wasn't the only thing I didn't hear. The hooves of the carriage approaching were falling of deaf ears.
It feels like my fault. What happened to Billy. He caught up to me in time, sure, but only in time to save me. Billy got to me befor the carriage but didn't make it out of the way in time. There was no pulling me back, it was either push me or I die. He chose he first.
But that wasn't the worst part, when I realized what he was doing the world care tumbling down on me. Everything became real the moment it happened. My hearing came back, and my reflexes did too but I stopped breathing, my throat completely dried in seconds, and I couldn't speak. I could only sit back and witness.
I feel back in the dust only inches away from fate but I watched him. I relieve every moment of it in my dreams. I could hear the pounding of the horses' feet and the creaking of the wagon. I could hear him as his body crunched and cracked and his cries of pain. I heard him. I watched him. I watched his body give out.
As soon as the cart was gone I scrambled to him. I put his head in my lap, I prayed and I cried but nothing happened. He lied there broken and the world around us stopped. The gun fire stopped. The people in shops came out. They stared in silence as I sobbed over him. No one said anything, and the two of us stayed there a while. Until the sun went down.
Chavez and Doc came from the shadows not long after the sun set. They were both shot to shit but we're healed to the best of their abilities. They placed a hand on my shoulder and insist I left him lie in peace before someone came to collect him. They laid a white sheet over his body to protect it and let me lay a rose on his chest before they walked me to the hotel.
No one bothered me after that. Not until the service was ready. They'd already buried him, they had to. But they had us there when they placed a blank marker there with nothing besides his name and birth and death dates. Even then it was shitty the way they did it. I didn't say a word, I didn't cry. I just went back to the hotel. And on the way up, I heard it.
The reason they didn't have a showing was because his body was missing, they'd buried him the night before and waited to have a small memorial for him. Yet when they arrived this morning, the grave was dug up and he was gone. The box they put him in looked like it'd be ripped in half. No one said a word to me.
They didn't have to because even now he was talking to me. When I arrived to our room, on the bed laid a small gold bracelet, engraved on the inside it read," Angel, the love of my life, I will always need you," along with a small note.
It wasn't signed but I knew it was his handwriting. He wrote to me about our love and that he hoped I would always love him even when he was gone. He ended acknowledging that he was now gone but reminded me to be strong even if he couldn't be there.
Nothing had ever tore me apart more. I wore the golden bangle every second of every day. I know he said to stay strong but what was life if I lived it without him?
So here I sit in the old rocking chair I requested for the room a day ago. I sat in it a lot, rocking to figure out my feelings and after a while I did figure them out. This was it.
I took Billy's lasso off his horse before I sent both our horses with Chavez. Neither man had said much to me following those events. I imagined Doc would be heading back to New York to be with his wife. And Chavez would start making his way to work in California. No one bothered me. I told them both I was going to settle here to be close to Billy. They believed me without a doubt.
I pulled the chair under the rafters and found a distinct hole in the wood. I assume it was to hold things like planters. Well it was about to hold a bit more than a few plants.
His lasso was much stronger than it looked. I realize now I had slipped. I ran myself on autopilot rather than how I would any other day.
I hadn't bothered with breakfast. I took our money to the orphanage in town. I gave them our other clothes too. The only thing I really kept was the red dress I'd gotten that day, the bracelet he gave me, and the red bolo I never got to give him.
The red bolo sat firmly around my neck. The texture of the rope lightly dug into my throat. I swiftly leaned forward and after that, my memory blurs.
"That didn't even happen in this lifetime and I feel guilty about it," a sniff followed my statement.
"Don't, without that moment, would we be here now?" Marlo's head found itself on my stomach as his body laid between my legs.
My fingers brushed lightly through his golden curls.
"No, but reguardless-"
"Reguardless we have the rest of forever. If I had to choose to do it again or keep on living back then, know I would do it again every time."
I didn't say much but I leaned down and placed a kiss on the cherub's head as we all laid in silence for a couple moments. That didn't last long as from the entry we heard a loud thump and cursing.
I let out a sigh that lead into a giggle. Marko's hands languidly ran up and down my thighs. Dwayne nonchalantly ran fingers down my arm until we locked hands. David sat up, smoking another cigarette as Paul tumbled in.
He had a joint in one hand and a familiar bottle on wine in the other.
"Glad you joined the party. Would you like to contribute to story night?"
Revised: 7/22/2020