A/N: I'm horribly behind with my cross-posting! Going to try and get that done over the next week or so.

Written for the Strictly Lumione Valentine's Fest 2021! Many thanks to the modmins of Strictly Lumione for hosting this fest! It's such a fun one to do! My prompt was the quote: "Just pretend to be my date."

No beta, only Grammarly.

If you liked this (or hated it) let me know about it in a review! You can find me on Tumblr at crochetawayhpff or Facebook at Shan Crochetaway. Enjoy!

Summary: In a fit of madness, Hermione asks Lucius to be her date to Ron's wedding.

Pairing: Hermione Granger/Lucius Malfoy

Rating: T

Warnings: Fake/Pretend Relationship

The Pretend Date

Hermione bounced on the balls of her feet as she went over the argument in her head once more. It was probably the fifth or sixth time she had done so, just this morning, but the invitation to Ron's wedding was burning a hole in her countertop in her flat and she had to have a response for the RSVP by the end of the week. Better to get this over with now, and then she could move on to someone who might actually say yes to being her date to her ex's wedding.

It was stupid, it's not like she had to ask him, but once the thought had occurred to her… she couldn't get it out of her head. Now it felt imperative. She had to know what he would say. Shaking her head, she laughed softly to herself, she already knew what he was going to say. It was a fool's errand to ask him, but here she was, hovering outside of his office, early on a Wednesday morning.

His secretary was giving her the side-eye, but she was here so often, that she didn't make Hermione leave. That, at least, was a relief. She wasn't sure she could stand the embarrassment of being escorted out of his office before she had inappropriately propositioned him. At least if it happened afterward, it would possibly be justified.

"Good morning, Mr Malfoy," his secretary chirped as the whoosh of the lift doors sounded from behind Hermione. She turned and tried to smile at him, but she was sure it came out as a grimace. Especially when he sighed heavily at seeing her.

He nodded at his secretary, but only had eyes for her. "Miss Granger, what can I do for you so early this morning?" He didn't sound pleased to see her at all, and Hermione's anxiety ratcheted up.

"Can we speak in your office, Mr Malfoy?" she asked, giving him a tight-lipped smile. His eyes narrowed as he swept them over her so quickly she wasn't even sure it had happened. He held out his hand, indicating she should proceed before him into the office and she did so. She wasn't sure, but it felt like his eyes may have strayed to her arse. She hoped so. She was wearing her tightest work dress today in hopes that it would give her the confidence boost she needed. Or, maybe persuade him. Either way, it wouldn't hurt, she had decided that morning as she put it on.

The door shut with a soft click and he passed by her so closely, she could feel the breeze of his body. He settled into his seat behind his desk, propping his cane up against the solid, oak desk and indicating she should sit in one of the visitor's chairs.

She did so, but sat right at the very edge, ready to spring to her feet the moment he said no.

"Well?"

"I… um…" she swallowed hard and looked down at her hands, trying to remember the speech she had prepared.

"Spit it out, Miss Granger. I haven't all day," Lucius Malfoy said sharply.

"WillyougowithmetoRon'swedding," Hermione said so quickly to her hands wringing in her lap.

"Pardon?"

She took a deep breath and looked up at a spot just over his left shoulder. "I need a date for Ron's wedding. And it's stupid and you'll say no, but will you just pretend to be my date?"

Her entire body braced for his rejection, she was poised to stand, but no rejection came. Instead, he asked when the wedding was.

As if on autopilot, Hermione gave him the relevant details.

Lucius hummed thoughtfully, his eyes sweeping over her again. "I'm not sure I know how to pretend to be someone's date," he said finally.

That statement startled Hermione enough to actually look at him. She could detect amusement in his eyes, but also interest. She opened her mouth to reply, but no words came out and she closed it again.

"However, if you would like me to actually be your date, I think I could fit it into my schedule," he added magnanimously. One corner of his mouth quirked up.

"Are you joking?" Hermione asked, completely unable to tell.

Lucius frowned. "No," he said slowly, "are you? Is there really no wedding?"

Hermione shook her head. "Yes, of course, there's a wedding… but why would you agree to go with me?"

Lucius's face became carefully blank. "Why would you ask me?"

"Because I thought you would say no," Hermione said in a rush. "I never thought you would agree. I…"

He leaned further back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning deeply at her. "Is this some sort of prank?"

"I…" Hermione shook her head, trying to come up with an answer. "Sorry, no it's not a prank. I got the idea in my head to ask you and then I couldn't not ask you, but I was convinced you would say no. Why did you agree?" She peered up at his blank face, searching for an answer.

"I'm free on that date," he replied with a shrug. "It seemed as if you wanted some sort of moral support for your friend's wedding. Besides, it would upset Arthur."

Hermione frowned. She hadn't thought about how it would make Arthur and Molly feel if she showed up with Lucius. "I— thank you for agreeing, but you're right, it would anger Arthur. I don't want to do that. I'm afraid—"

"Ah, you can't take it back now, Miss Granger," Lucius said with a smirk. "You've asked, and I've agreed. It appears I will be your date for Ron Weasley's wedding. Who is he marrying again?"

"Lavender Brown," Hermione replied, wrinkling her nose. She couldn't seem to stop herself from doing it, even though she tried. It was ridiculous, feeling upset that Ron was marrying Lavender, but there it was. And that was the crux of the reason she had decided to ask Lucius Malfoy.

"Oleander Yaxley's daughter?" Lucius asked with a slight pucker between his brows.

Hermione nodded. "Yes, the very same. But you're right abou—"

"Well then, I shall have to accompany you," Lucius said as if the matter was completely settled.

"What? No, you—"

"Miss Granger, are you really going to rescind my invitation? How rude," Lucius said, lifting his nose into the air and glaring down at her.

She bit her lip. He was right. It would be the height of rudeness to ask him and then uninvite him, but he was also right that it would rile up Arthur. And Ron, her brain helpfully supplied. That was the crux of it. She wanted to rile Ron up. She hoped he choked when he saw who she was with.

"Fine," she said ungraciously. "The wedding is at two in the afternoon and the invitation is a Portkey. Shall we meet at my flat?"

He nodded and waved his fingers in dismissal as he began sorting through the correspondence on his massive desk. She frowned at him while standing stiffly and marching from the room. She wasn't sure why she asked him beyond knowing that it would annoy Ron. She firmly refused to think about how good he looked at the gala last month in his dress robes. Nope, that was definitely not why she asked him.

Six Weeks Later

Hermione couldn't quite believe that she was actually going through with this. She had barely seen Lucius since she stormed into his office and asked him to be her date all those weeks ago. She had almost hoped he had forgotten all about it, but just yesterday he had sent her an owl confirming the time he was to meet her at her flat. Now she was all dressed up and rocking in her heels as she tried to calm her anxiety.

How in the world was she going to explain this to anyone?

How had that thought just occurred to her? Horror filled her as she realized she was going to have to explain this to Harry and Ron and the rest of the Weasleys at some point. What on earth was she going to say? That she and Lucius were dating? Bile rose up just as a knock sounded on her door. She hurried to answer it, her fear and apprehension heavy on her face.

Lucius looked amazing, just as she expected him to and she waved him inside her flat. It seemed even smaller when he was standing in her lounge. She turned away from him and took a few deep breaths. What on earth had she been thinking? Inviting Lucius Malfoy to her ex's wedding had to be the most self-destructive thing she could have done.

"Are you alright?" Lucius asked. She could feel him behind her, her lounge room suddenly feeling smaller as the tension between them grew.

"I fear I've made a mistake," Hermione said in a small voice. She took a big breath and turned to face him. "I can hardly show up with you on my arm," she said, refusing to meet his eye. "How on earth would I ever explain it?"

"Explain what?" Lucius asked, taking a step closer to her.

Hermione felt her cheeks warm, he was really going to make her say it, wasn't he?

"Explain you," she said. "Explain to my friends and family how I ended up on the arm of Lucius Malfoy. The Lucius Malfoy. The one who hated Muggleborns so much he joined a cult dedicated to their eradication."

"Perhaps," Lucius said slowly, "it was less about the Muggleborns and more about power."

Hermione gaped up at him and half-laughed when she saw the smirk on his face. She couldn't believe he had just made a joke at his own expense.

"There's nothing to explain. Two consenting adults are dating. What's to explain?" He shrugged so nonchalantly, Hermione almost believed him.

"Dating? Now we're dating?" Hermione asked, her eyes widening. She shook her head. "I'm not sure I can pull off fake dating now too."

She looked down at her hands, realizing she was wringing them, as she always did when she fretted like this.

Lucius cleared his throat and Hermione forced her gaze back up to his. He had a very calculating look on his face. "Of course you can. You wouldn't have suggested I 'pretend' to be your date if you didn't think you could pull it off. We can tell them it was a whirlwind over the last few weeks."

"That was madness," Hermione shook her head, "asking you like that."

"So why did you?" Lucius peered down at her and her heart fluttered wildly in her chest. She knew exactly why she had asked him. Her tongue darted out to lick her bottom lip and she pulled it into her mouth, biting down on it gently.

"Why does anyone ask one out?" she whispered, her gaze darting from his, unable to watch whatever emotions would flit across his face at that admission.

"Indeed," he replied, sounding amused. "Shall we?" The Portkey on the reception table near the door just started glowing blue.

Within three steps they were across the room and both had a finger on the invitation just as the yank came from behind their navels, Lucius slid an arm around her waist, holding her close as they whirled through the distance to a bright, sunny field in Devonshire.

"Steady, there," Lucius whispered into her hair just as they landed and a group of wedding attendees turned to see who had just arrived. Even from this distance, Hermione could see eyes widening and tongues wagging.

She lifted her chin and Lucius left his palm on the small of her back as she took that first, scary step forward and greeted the Weasleys and guests.

The wedding was mostly fine. She received some looks from the rest of the clan but decided that ignoring them was her best bet. It wasn't the ceremony she was worried about anyway. Nobody was going to track her down and corner her, expressing concern about her choices while Ron and Lavender were saying their 'I do's.'

She wasn't ambushed until almost an hour after dinner, which Hermione thought showed remarkable restraint on the part of her friends. She wasn't even all that surprised by who did the ambushing. Lucius had stepped outside of the tent for the loo and promised to return with drinks and Hermione found not just Molly, but Arthur as well. Oh, well, they must be concerned if Arthur was getting involved.

"So glad you could come, Hermione," Molly said, pulling her into a hug. They may not have ended up as a family, but Molly always felt like her second mum. Arthur reached in to give her a side hug as well.

They dispensed with the pleasantries quickly. "So, Lucius Malfoy?" Arthur asked, his eyebrows rising high on his head. "He's a bit old for you, isn't he?"

Hermione bit her lips to keep from laughing. "Would that be your only objection to him?"

"Ah, well, not that it's our place," Arthur stuttered.

"We just want to make sure you're taken care of," Molly said emphatically. Hermione was wringing her hands, almost unconsciously, and gave Molly and Arthur a tight smile.

"Of course, Lucius has been wonderful," she replied. Her brain was working overtime trying to figure a way out of this conversation.

A moment later, Lucius slid his hands between hers, threading their fingers together and the tightness in Hermione's chest eased as their palms pressed together.

"Molly, Arthur," he rumbled, with a dip of his head in their direction.

"Lucius," Arthur replied looking as though he were trying not to sneer, Hermione thought it just looked like he was constipated. "So kind of you to make it to Ron's wedding."

"Well, how could I say no when Hermione asked?" He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of Hermione's head. She beamed up at him, completely unaware of what this looked like from the outside. Perhaps asking Lucius to be her pretend date wouldn't be the disaster she had been dreading all these weeks.

After the ambush by Molly and Arthur, the rest of her friends had to make their voices heard. Some were more subtle about it than others. Ron, for instance, yanked her away from Lucius to have a heated debate behind the tent that she was sure everyone could hear. That was confirmed once she'd finally pulled herself away from him and returned to find people studiously ignoring her.

Harry, at least, was better about it, just asking if everything was alright. George wondered, in front of Lucius, no less, if someone had put something in her drink. Strongly hinting that 'someone' was Lucius and that 'something' was a love potion.

Lucius was a courteous guest and danced with her just the right amount. When things finally began winding down, the moon was up and it had been dark for at least three full hours.

"How do you feel about leaving?" Lucius asked, his hand straying to the small of her back. She leaned into him, loving the way it felt to do so. Somehow, despite his age, his body felt firm beneath his dress robes.

"I'm ready. Irish goodbye?" Hermione asked, looking up at him.

He smirked down at her. "The best kind, really."

They slipped out of the tent, hopefully unseen, and Lucius Apparated them to her flat. Hermione was glad to kick off her heels and poured a nightcap for both of them. They settled onto the sofa.

"Cheers to making our way through that unscathed," Hermione said, clinking their glasses together.

"I hope I wasn't too terrible of a 'pretend' date," Lucius murmured, looking at her over the top of his glass.

"I thought you didn't know how to be a pretend date?" Hermione asked, tipping her head to the side and trying desperately to hide a smile.

Lucius hummed. "Perhaps not. Shall we go for round two? Perhaps lunch at that new bistro in Diagon Alley tomorrow?"

"Oh, yes, I would love that," Hermione said with a grin. Lucius put his glass down and lifted Hermione's hand, kissing the back of it.

"It's a date then," he said a sly smile on his face. Then he stood and was out her door with a, "See you at noon," tossed over his shoulder.

Hermione leaned back against her sofa, drinking the rest of her brandy and smiling absently at her door. Asking Lucius to be her pretend wedding date was looking like the best idea she'd had in ages.

~Fin~