A/N: Heads up, there is a Youtube link that leads to a song that should be played when it appears for maximum effect. This isn't something I would think to do often, but on an occasion like this, I thought it would heighten the experience further to add it in.
Twenty One Pilots (Falling into the Rabbit Hole)
Hello, fellows! I heard you wanted stories about people's descent into hololive, so I thought, Why not tell you mine, but add a few bells and whistles to keep it interesting? Well, that's what you're gonna get, so strap yourselves in, enjoy the ride, and try not to get sick, alright? I'm warning you now, this style of writing I'm using is very different from what I'm used to. You're in for the long spiral downward, and apologies if a lot of the references, eh, fly over your head. Most are from a different hole I fell into. Now where to start… Ah, right!
In a… real strange world parallel to our own, where major wars are waged every few years and air combat decides the outcome of most battles, I made preparations to become a fighter pilot. And to think that passion all began with a single song that got autoplayed by Youtube back in Spring 2020. As I immersed myself in the history of the land I found myself in, I couldn't help but return to one of my usual habits: browsing the latest memes and meme trends.
Outside of the typical waves of fanart and the occasional meme, one post in particular seized my attention. It was a Youtube community post screenshot advertising a 3D show, which the OP asserted that it looked like a porn ad. In OP's defense, the ad's wording didn't help its case. Still, that was my first exposure to Kiryu Coco, and to hololive in general.
On that day, as I practiced flying in a Fighting Falcon, I noticed a clearing in the forest pretty far from the base. As I got closer, I identified it as a modest pit, like a whirlpool in the sea of trees. It was more than wide enough to accommodate a plane, like a vertical tunnel.
I asked over comms, "It seems we have a big sinkhole here, but it doesn't look natural. Anyone wanna be the first to dive straight in and post-stall maneuver their way out?"
To my surprise, the instructor gruffly answered over the radio, I wouldn't if I were you. That particular interworld portal is a work hazard. Most people who enter the 'rabbit hole' keep finding themselves drawn to it, like the hole was 'made for them' or some shit.
I scoffed, joking, "Seriously? That's what we're calling it? And it's just a work hazard?"
He responded gruffly, These holes popped up in a few places, even in a crater left by Ulysses. It's what the ones that drag others in call them. Those Vtubers knew how to reel men in and never let go, especially the bunny girl. That's a dangerous place to enter.
At the mention of 'Vtubers', my mind jumped back a few years, back to when an old friend of mine would gush about Kizuna Ai when she first debuted.
I realized, So she started a lasting trend, huh? Good for her. Then, I thought back to the girl with the purple tail, believing her to be a bizarre one. Oh, how right I would be.
A few days later, on the same meme site as before, a gif of Coco popped up, waving a gun to the camera in full 3D. That should've tipped me off that maybe there was something special about her and the company that hired her, that there was more than just a pretty face that would occasionally spew curses.
That was the first chance I had to check out the rabbit hole, but I turned away. After all, I had found my calling; I found something that, had I discovered it years ago and not just the prior spring, would've completely changed the road I've taken. In only a short time, I grew fascinated with this world's battles and was left awestruck by its superweapons and superplanes. I was convinced my home was the sky, so why would I bother with some hole in the ground?
A year ago, there was a huge commotion at air force bases around the federation regarding one of the more… eccentric ones, even for us mad pilots. Invasion 2's proper callsign was Caster, but since the ace fighters threw formality out of the same window they did with the laws of physics, most just called him by his Youtube username, Max0r.
He posted an 'incorrect review' of his campaign to his channel, which threatened to give the viewers sensory overload every other second for 24 minutes straight if they didn't die of laughter first. Pilots all around loved it, quoting him whenever the opportunity presented itself and inspiring a new era of memes and shitposts on our subreddit. Even now, people will still make references to him and flock to his newest videos whenever they come out.
Perhaps the most memorable part of that video was his interpretation of the insane rogue submarine captain he had to take down. Max0r reasoned that the captain was driven to madness after the latter spent two years stuck at the bottom of the sea, only able to entertain himself by watching Houshou Marine. Yeah… How much of that was true remains a mystery, but the Youtuber managed to expose a brand new audience to hololive, leaving many of us with a positive opinion on the company because we memed that particular part that often.
Over the next few weeks, I watched as many pilots of various ranks march towards the rabbit hole of their own volition, with the official ban against entering it being lifted entirely. Pinup art on planes has long been a staple of aerial combat since its inception. Given that Emmeria's military had the budget to, for some reason, paint girls from The IDOLM STER series onto entire squadrons of their fighter jets, nobody batted an eye when more anime girls got painted on, stealth be damned. It didn't take long for me to realize how many fighter pilots put their favorite Vtuber on their wings. When I next passed over the rabbit hole, it had grown significantly, owning up to its legend as an inescapable pit. The flight instructor was right. Too bad Max0r dragged him and many of the higher-ups down as well.
Not long after, I started seeing fanart of Coco drawn by a… certain artist. They decided to make several memes of her making jabs at China. They painted her as the defiant and smug protagonist, even redrawing a scene from Avengers: Endgame to put Coco as Iron Man and put a girl in a shark hoodie in charge of the Blipped reinforcements. Somehow, the opponents were powerless before the small girl, who defeated them with only a single sound. How was an outsider like me supposed to understand the significance of it all?
...
Oi! I can see the lecherous grins on some of your faces! If you know, you know, and let the others find out for themselves, so don't spoil the sauce!
...Anyways.
Getting back to the story, these were just random everyday encounters to me. Ever heard of identical strangers? I first found Shirogane Noel when I tried to learn more about Noelle from Genshin Impact. The two even looked very similar, but once I found the one I was looking for, I moved on. Those events held nothing immediately meaningful, and there were no guarantees that I would've ever run into them again. At least, nothing was guaranteed until that day.
It was a cold and (possibly) snowy day… In January 2021, I decided to dig through the record books in search of especially noteworthy pilots, hoping that observing their techniques would improve my own flying. I browsed through Youtube, inputting names to see if anything popped up. However, a particular video found me first.
The video in question was a reenactment of the final showdown of the Belkan War, created by… osga71-MMD, I believe. They had the oni girl Nakiri Ayame stand in for the Solo Wing and the fox girl Shirakami Fubuki as the Demon Lord. I thought that it was one of those videos where you chose a famous scene and replaced the characters with equally fitting ones, and I guessed correctly. Yet the video gave the latter a nickname, the 'Trigger-Fox of the Razgriz'. I needed to learn more. Razgriz, after all, was a powerful mythical demon in this parallel world, this fan-domain formed from a love of Strangereal. To be named after them took no small feat.
When I checked their channel, I was surprised to find Fubuki on the thumbnail of their oldest video. Clicking on it, I watched her pained reaction to a recurring trend in many aces' careers, yet another tunnel run. Having flown through similar conditions myself, Fubuki had my sympathies… but I flew in the supermaneuverable Raptor, and she somehow managed those tight turns in a Super Tomcat! I had to confirm if this was true, and thankfully, the resources I needed were already right in front of me.
Sure enough, those recognizable white ears and that friendly smile showed up in two separate files, having flown under Osea's flag twice. Coming to this wartorn planet and becoming a pilot was not an idea that would show up on most people's radar, but finishing two campaigns on top of that? Now that held my attention.
Of course, the videos I watched that day also held Youtube's attention, since it started recommending Vtuber clips to me for the next 4 months. But when I later tried to examine Fubuki's 1st campaign, the results came up blank. No clips, no translations, no archives. An entire unsung war, if you will. It was as if everything official surrounding her involvement was kept top-secret, with nothing but wikia articles, TV Tropes entries, miscellaneous fanart, and the clip used in osga71's video to prove she ever flew back then.
Could it be that she was one of the enigmatic Ghosts? ...Well, I was never one to get too invested into conspiracies. A shame that I might never see her development as a pilot, but not a complete loss. There were still VODs of her battles against the drones, and the random Vtuber clips did well to keep me entertained and interested as I finished the last bit of my studies.
I even started making trips to the rabbit hole by foot. Sure, it seems like an endless void from afar, but get up close, and you'll see all of the brilliant lights and some of the most lively communities in the fan-domain of holoearth. Something was always happening somewhere, especially by the fans that would go into overdrive as their idols rested. In those four months of researching hololive, I read about many events that happened in the idol company's storied history, but I didn't quite understand them or how they fit into the bigger picture. Along the way, I also finally decided on five Vtubers to set my focus on, as to not spread myself out too thinly.
The ace combatant Fubuki was an obvious pick. Noel seemed nice, having a sweet voice (and totally not because she reminded me of the other Noelle), but what really reeled me in was a clip from when a fan asked her for recommendations of girls to watch. It started off normal, but her face quickly took up the screen before she bluntly asked 'why not me?', to which I asked in kind. Hoshimachi Suisei advertised herself as a jack-of-all-trades, and true to her word, I found no weaknesses in the Sheer Comet Attack. Everything from her was stellar. Oozora Subaru fascinated me by how different she was starting out compared to everyone else, and she honestly was the most refreshing to be around, if you can believe that. Calliope Mori also had a different vibe to her that quickly resonated with me, and her Roki cover convinced me shortly after.
June 8th, 2021. Many people will remember that day for one particular reason, but I remember it for a bit more.
When I woke up, I checked my phone, and to my surprise, Fubuki had already started streaming The Henry Stickmin Collection. Having played the series since Stealing the Diamond, it was an integral part of my childhood since it exposed me to many different medias through references, and to know that someone else decided to play it, I just couldn't wait any longer. I made another email specifically for Youtube, subscribed to the aforementioned five idols, and with this new identity, I marched over to the rabbit hole and jumped right in for the first time.
I opened my eyes to find myself in a bustling megacity, reminiscent of Tokyo but with a touch of Los Angeles here and there. Everywhere I looked, lights flashed, people talked in many tongues, and others scurried to get to their destination, mumbling about how they were 'late for a very important date'. Given that I was late myself, I hurried through the roaring streets before I reached a massive movie theater. On the kind of stage you might see in a TED Talk, Fubuki sat in front of a desk, her gaming rig on top. A projector shone onto the massive wall behind her, displaying her screen, her face, and the live chat. Meanwhile, speakers delivered her voice for all to hear. Though the audience's section was darkened, it was easy to find a seat. Despite the steady flow of people joining, it seemed like there were always enough seats for everyone. Each chair also came with the swinging tables you might see on movie theater seats, but these tables also had built-in keyboards. The holographic UI asked me to log in, and so I did. Since I wasn't a member, it blocked me from accessing the members-only emotes, which was reasonable.
There was a lot I didn't understand yet about this place's customs, like the spamming of one specific kanji whenever she failed hilariously, but it seemed like there was a lot Fubuki didn't understand either with regard to the game. It made sense after all, given that she was a Japanese fox girl looking at decade-old English memes. Yet she kept on trying to read all of the English and she honestly seemed to enjoy every moment of it regardless. Her friendly smile and infectious laughter made me feel welcome, and I did not regret staying until the end.
After returning to base, I found a VOD of the same game played by one of holoMyth's members. Gura wasn't a priority of mine since I knew I'd look into the other EN girls eventually, but I decided to see how the Atlantean would feel about the game. I was elated to see that she got a lot of the references, and the fans were quick to tell her about the ones she missed. As expected, they were rather forceful in trying to get Gura to 100% the game, but hey, I've a bad history of being overbearing and backseating myself that I've been trying to work on...
After getting through most of it, I decided to take on a brief but difficult mission. All I needed to do was rapidly fly through a ravine in the dark and at low altitude to help capture the base located at the other end. I even shot down another named ace while I was there. Then, as the sun set back at base, my world turned dark… literally. Supposedly, a lightning strike hit a tree which knocked down a power line, which led to my residence losing all power. To add insult to injury, it seemed that my dorm was the only one affected by this, which got a few chuckles from my friends. Unable to do anything but wait for the electricians to come and fix the problem, I called it a night and went to bed much, much earlier than I normally would have.
Waking up the next day to find that the lights were back on, I decided to see what sort of stories people in this community wrote, so I went onto AO3 and looked through the most recent stories tagged 'hololive'. One story in particular set off alarms everywhere in my mind. The author remains anonymous, but the story was called "Good Night, Motherfuckers". That title and a short two-sentence summary were all of the dots I needed to connect to get the bigger picture.
"Coco…" I muttered, and as I left my room, I found many of the part-time residents of the rabbit hole freaking out, in denial, or sobbing, leaving the newcomer to their thoughts.
Maybe someone is trying to tell me something, I speculated. If they spoke to me, they might've said something like, 'Keep going down the rabbit hole, and all you'll find at the bottom is pain. Your power was cut as a warning. This is your last chance to run and never look back.'
So I ran and never looked back.
…
Towards the rabbit hole, obviously. Why else would I be writing this?
If any higher being wanted to send that message to me, they found themselves massively misled by the massive misinterpretation I've made. If only they did their research.
Y'see, back in November 2019, I had the chance to watch a certain year-long project (it was even in the name, though in Latin) on Youtube daily all the way through to the very end. Yet after a month or too, I couldn't handle the constant reminders of my mortality, and I cut myself off from the channel while dealing with these newfound fears and worries from time to time. It was only in the following September that I mustered the courage to pick up where I left off, and by the channel's final week, I was fully caught up. I left the last livestream feeling fulfilled, if only somewhat lost on the next step to take on my lifelong journey. To any readers that were also there, I suppose the phrase 'memento mori' might hit somewhat differently as well.
Me? Oh, I'm feeling a lot better and more confident in my life choices nowadays, if you were wondering. I've been feeling that way for some time before I jumped into the rabbit hole. That's why I felt confident enough to change my plans and spend the next three weeks getting to know Kiryu Coco as well as I could. If what I heard about her was true, then this was the least I could do for her. Three weeks to say hello, three weeks to tune in to her show; three weeks to say goodbye, three weeks to see if I would cry...
I started from the very beginning: Kiryu Coco's debut stream. First came her origin story set to her rendition of Part of Your World, a song that will forever remind me of her and not of a little mermaid. Then, as she began speaking about her plans for the upcoming year, I was shocked by how… meek she sounded. It was hard to believe that this was the same dragon that would wave a gun to her audience in six months. Six months… I don't think anyone could've predicted that her 3D debut would commemorate the first third of her career in hololive, but would knowing that change anything? Would it spoil the fun and the memories that were made?
Then came the Asacocos, a constant source of content for the viewers. I made sure to watch every single one, but sadly, my lack of motivation to study Japanese had once again reared its ugly head. If Google wasn't kind enough to offer an autotranslate for the chat and comments, I had to go in blind, with only the pictures to guide like a game of Gartic Phone. But when the comments were generous enough to have both timestamps and English summaries, the scattered fragments of history that accumulated in the depths of my mind started to *click* together like magnetic puzzle pieces, forming a clearer and clearer timeline as I kept watching. I started to not just know the history of hololive, but to understand it. Things really kicked into high gear after the Asacoco on 4/20, where Kaichou herself started adding English subs.
As for her gameplay and collab streams, I did my best to watch the VODs in the background. At least, the ones I was interested in watching, since my life on our Earth kept calling me out of the rabbit hole. Sadly, and this is a problem with myself, not her, I could not bring myself to watch her ARK videos, despite knowing that she paid for the hololive server out-of-pocket and started the ARK craze. You'd think someone that loves Monster Hunter would enjoy watching ARK, given the giant monsters in both, but between 2017 and now, I still can't get into it. As for the Monster Hunter Rise videos, I'm not watching anyone's gameplay until it comes on PC and I can play it myself. I've gotten good at unconsciously reading the monsters' animations, and I want these new monsters to surprise me with their attacks. But given that I only ever watched other people play Minecraft, seeing her learn the mechanics was touching.
Her various other videos were always a treat. After a long day, Bar Coco helped me unwind. I watched her growth as a singer through her karaoke performances, evolving from 'drugged Mickey Mouse' to... 'Asacoco'd bottom right idol'. By the time I got to her 3D debut show, the one I really should've watched a year ago, it dawned on me how the Kiryu Coco I saw back then was the same Kiryu Coco I was seeing now. Even at her reserved start, she had her ambitions and ideals written out as clear as day and she knew how to stay true to them. For example, her Reddit MEME Reviews started not long after that, and while it was a place to the English fans to get famous for their shitposts, it was also a place for the main Japanese fanbase to learn more about how their overseas brethren thought, how they communicated, and how they expressed themselves. Coco Kaine, even if she was just a joke for the Asacocos, was one of many expressions of Kaichou's dream to connect fans around the globe together, and after seeing both hololive EN in action and seeing people on holoearth bond over shitty Japanglish, I knew her dream was in good hands, that it would remain alive long after she left.
As I went through the archives, I also attended many of the live shows she held as well. I watched the secrets of Asacoco passed down from senpai to kouhai, one last Asacoco on her 3502nd birthday, and the debut of a onesie that looked so comfortable, it must've cost at least $9001, all live. I listened to her original song and her cover, but I didn't bother looking at the lyrics, nor did I listen to holoForce's "Kiseki Knot' yet. You have to understand, it was already so close to July, and I didn't want to let Kaichou down by letting the waterworks flow before that.
In the blink of an eye, I made it through most of the archives, wanting to save the more Japanese-heavy gameplay VODs, especially Yakuza, as another incentive to finally learn Japanese. At the same time, July arrived. As pilots from all over Strangereal rushed to see Kaichou's last show, we paid no attention to trivial matters like 'who came from where'. Things like nations and rank were all meaningless then. On that day, we all flew for the Kiryu clan.
I'll admit, I held on longer than many, but holoForce hit me full-force in the feels. Towa's voice alone cracked the dams I worked so hard to maintain throughout, and Kanata's letter to Coco shattered them beyond repair. By the time they all got onstage, I didn't even bother trying to hold back my tears. But I did keep on smiling, even as Coco waved goodbye onstage one last time. Shortly after, I rewatched her "Weather Hackers" video, turning on subtitles this time. The lyrics were so Kaichou that I couldn't help but tear up, both of laughter and of fulfillment. Lastly came "Kiseki Knot", which didn't even take a minute to get the waterworks started. Although I cried so much for someone I 'knew' for only a month, I couldn't help but feel satisfied, satisfied that although the end of her career did happen, she went out the Kiryu way: with a big bang for all of her fans to remember her highly. We fighter pilots wanted to do the same for her.
Among the aces that showed up, only the ones that were not completely crippled by their emotions were chosen for one last send-off. My tears dried up quickly, so I was lucky to be chosen for this task, placed as one of the rearguard. I remember watching my commanders and flight instructor salute me as I took off, telling me to say 'hello to our friend up there'. Ten pairs of planes took off from their respective bases an hour before midnight and dove into their closest rabbit holes.
As we slowly met up, we formed a large V-formation as we headed for the spot where Coco would leave holoearth for home. I looked through the glass cockpit of my Rafale M, at each plane labelled both as 'ALLY' and with their respective squadron callsigns, and I noticed that we slowly relaxed and shifted our formation until our radar showed a shape resembling a crescent, albeit one with a hole in the middle big enough for one more plane.
Shortly before we reached the site, another fighter jet quickly came into view, and we slowed down behind it, letting it lead us. I could tell that there was something special about this plane: the one that filled the gap was a pitch-black F-14D tagged as 'FRND' and nothing else, after all. Couldn't make out the squadron or personal emblems from all the way in the back, though. Then, someone, possibly from the lead plane, began whistling a very familiar tune over the radio (A/N: add /watch?v=WSuMXlkd5jQ to Youtube to find and play the song mentioned). We quickly joined in, not caring for our individual talents or lack thereof. We sang messily and unprofessionally at first, but soon found our comfort zones and harmonized louder than the roar of our engines. For a brief time, the world had no boundaries to separate us...
After a half-minute of warm-up, we flew towards a cliff overlooking the ocean. Below, Coco stood on the cliff's edge, surrounded by the rest of her adoring fans, friends, and family. With a final wave, she transformed and took off. She easily overtook us, but waited patiently for us to catch up. Oh, what we need to mimic a fraction of her power! Meanwhile, the one who started the song stopped whistling. I dunno if they also began singing or if they wanted to reminisce on their time with Coco once more, but as Kaichou began her ascent, we kept singing.
We fighter pilots, who flew as if we lacked blood, sang as we pierced the clouds and approached the dark blue of the sky. Alas, our planes were not built for space. As our wings of steel creaked and our jet engines gasped for air, we Tatsunokos, both official and honorary, veterans and greenhorns to the rabbit hole, eventually had to give up on trailing her as well.
As Coco escaped holoearth's gravity well, we took a sharp nosedive towards the surface while keeping our order and formation. When the clock struck midnight, we simultaneously popped our countermeasures, performing an impromptu '21-flare salute' for our dear Kaichou and briefly illuminating the night sky with lights in the shape of the Kiryu family's crest.
While we RTB'd, the F-14D disappeared into the clouds and off of radar. It happened so quickly, it was as if we were following a phantom this entire time. Our respective commanders gave us the day off, though we doubted that anyone at base would get anything done on a day like this. The 'rain' wouldn't let up as we faced a new dawn, one without her to wake us up...
Thus, my 'introductory course to hololive' came to an end, and I started watching the five I initially set my sights on, doing my best to peek at their VODs in chronological order to keep piecing this puzzle of a timeline together. Often, I join the live shows of other members that catch my eye, especially the rest of hololive EN. Can you believe it's not even been two weeks since the holoCouncil debuted? Well, story time's up. I won't keep you any longer, so just remember to enjoy what you have while they're there, and farewell, fellows!