"What are you, his boyfriend?" Vernon's voice was filled with venom while Petunia's face filled with horror as they glared at Harry. "Ha, I always knew you would turn into one of them fags. Who else could love you?"
"Excuse me?" Draco asked, voice high. He counted to ten in his head, ignoring the voice of his father saying almost the exact words.
"He knows how disgusting he is. I never imagined he would have found another fag who loves him" Vernon shook his head "how disgusting." The words made Draco flinch violently. Harry squeezed his hand tighter. "I want you out of my house before I count to ten, or I'll really show you what I think about your kind."
Draco didn't even know which he meant, homosexuals or wizards, but he decided he couldn't. Through the haze in his head, he squeezed Harry's hand back and dragged him out of the room, barely able to see or think straight. Fog started to cloud his vision, and his chest grew tight to the point where he could barely breathe. He didn't even notice Harry curse and apparate them back to Grimmauld place.
His breaths grew shorter and more sporadic. He vaguely felt his back press against something soft, a chest or cushion maybe, and a soft voice telling him to breathe in his ear. Hands ran up and down his arms. A nose rubbed his hair. His lungs wouldn't work. His eyes were blurred over. Merline, was this what dying felt like? Where's Harry? Where was he? He needs Harry. Harry can stop this. But he isn't here. No one's here. No one is ever here. He's going to die alone.
"I've got you," a voice breaks through the fuzz in his head, "It's Harry, Draco. We're at Grimmauld place, you're having a panic attack, I'm holding you on the couch right now." Fingers pressed tightly against his arm. "Feel that? It's me, okay? I'm here."
The fog cleared a bit. His chest allowed him to take a shallow breath.
"There you go, Drac. Can you breathe again for me? You're okay. Let's start and breathe in four, okay, one two three four, good! Ready? Breathe out six, I know you can do it. One two three four five six. Perfect, you're doing so good love." The tightness in his chest dissolved slowly, leaving piece by piece with every inhale and exhale. Harry's voice continued to instruct him on how to breathe, increasing the length of breaths slowly.
"Try and find a few things you can hear. My voice, right? And there's the clock chiming for dinner, we can probably get take out if you want. And there's the rain outside." Draco vaguely recognized the noises as his mind focused a bit more. "Can you take a turn and find five things you can see?"
The fog had broken enough for Draco to vaguely recognize his surroundings. "The coffee table," he muttered weakly, barely able to hear or comprehend himself. Harry relaxed underneath him.
"Good, good. You're doing so well, love. Anything else?" Draco turned to him,
"You." The familiar black hair, green eyes, fading scar, it all felt like home. A home he couldn't be more thankful to have.
"That's right," Harry muttered, pulling him into a tight hug. "I'll always be here, okay?" The fog had mostly disappeared, leaving behind deep exhaustion that ran through his whole body and into
"I'm sorry. You warned me and I-"
"Don't apologize," Harry says, "He has more power that way. You did nothing wrong. Well…" Harry looked at him slyly "You were acting pretty Gryffindor defending me back there…"
Draco chuckled, "I'd defend you every day of my life, even if it meant being associated with those thunderheads."
Harry rested his head on top of Draco's once more, pulling him tight. "You were out for nearly 15 minutes this time. I was worried."
"I couldn't see or hear for a while," Draco admitted softly, "that's probably why the normal stuff you do didn't work until later."
"Seeing you like that...gosh Draco I always forget how terrifying it is." Draco pressed his head into Harry's chest further.
"I love you." He muttered. "Thank you for dealing with me."
- HP - DM -
Draco came home with the groceries the next day greeted with a bouquet of lilies and calla roses.
"Papa! Daddy bought you flowers!" Albus ran up to him before Harry had the chance to speak, hugging him around the knees. Draco stumbled back, before hugging the child back and reaching his husband.
"What's this for?" He asked, taking the roses and placing them in a vase filled with water. He put a stasis spell on them, before turning to Harry, who had a nervous grin on his face.
"I never thanked you for helping me with the Dursleys." He said shyly, wrapping his arms around Draco's waist, pulling him flush to his chest. Warmth flooded through Draco's chilled body from outside.
"You don't need to."
"But I do," Harry said, "you defended me in a way no one ever has before, you put yourself at risk for me, and that really meant a lot."
"It was kind of stupid of me to do that last part, but you're welcome nevertheless," Draco replied, still confused why this had been made such a deal.
"When you left, they told me how useless, worthless I had turned after leaving them. How I had turned into a nobody and if 'only you died in that war, maybe you would have had a purpose". Then you came and proved them entirely wrong, and watching their reaction to that, as disastrous as it turned out, was bl-brilliant." Harry cast a meaningful glance towards Albus, who was peacefully drawing on the table. "I got the closure I needed, even if it isn't exactly what I wanted. There's no way I'm opening up that chapter of my life again."
Draco chuckled, pulling Harry closer by the loops in his jeans. "That might have been the smartest thing you've said all week." Teasingly, he pecked Harry's lips, and lightly grinded against his groin, but detached himself before either of them got too carried away. "Later" he whispered against Harry's earlobe, sending shivers down the other man's spine.
- HP - DM -
They made love that night, many and many times over. Each whispering soft words of love and encouragement to each other.
At some point, around 2 am, they stopped and cuddled together in the bed simply enjoying each others presence. Harry had never felt safer, and Draco, he had never felt more loved.
"You know everything they said to you wasn't true, right?" Draco whispered, breaking the nearly sacred silence of the night. Harry rolled over so that he could look Draco straight in the eye.
"I try to tell myself that its lies, but Draco, I was raised being called those things. What they said was my truth for 11 years of my life. It's hard to leave that behind." Draco nodded and bit his lip. A sign that Harry had come to realize meant that he had something deep to say, but he wasn't sure how to express it.
Harry brought his hand to Draco's cheek, cupping it. Draco's eyelids fluttered closed, and he let out a content sigh.
"If you ever start thinking those things about yourself...if you ever have flashbacks or want to talk about it but feel like you can't, please come talk to me about it." Draco's voice cracked as he said please. "You don't deserve to feel that way about yourself."
Harry looked at him, contemplating his words for a bit, before nodding. "Ok," he whispered.
Draco nodded back, pressing a soft kiss to Harry's forehead. His hands skimmed over the soft skin of Harry's chest and shoulders, dipping into the all too familiar scars littered across his body.
He stopped on a particularly deep scar, right on Harry's shoulder. "Did he make this one?" He asked, voice tense but patient.
Harry's shoulder stiffened, and Draco quickly retracted his fingers. "Sorry, I'm sorry, I'll stop."
"No, no, its…its ok." Harry took a deep breath. "Yeah, he did. I got that the summer after fourth year. He was still pretty upset about me blowing up my aunt."
Draco grimaced. It wasn't enough for Harry to have had to go through a deadly tournament and watch Cedric die in the process. No, he also had been forced to return to a home filled with hatred and disdain instead of love and comfort. No wonder he had been so angry the following year. "I'm sorry." He whispered.
Harry shook his head, "Don't be. It's in the past now, we can't do anything to change it."
"I wish I could have been there to protect you." Harry chuckled.
"You still hated my guts back then. I was pretty sure that even if you ever did find me during the summer, you would probably just help Vernon and laugh about it later at school." Draco tensed up.
"Harry...you know I would never…"
"I know, Draco, I know. We were 15. I know you better now, and I'm in a better place now. It's ok." Draco nodded. Gently placing his hand back on Harry's shoulder, he continued gently tracing his skin. Harry's muscles relaxed under his touch, and he gave a soft sigh of comfort.
"What's this from?" Draco murmured, hands brushing over an all too perfect circle scar. Harry flinched. "It can't be from the Horntail... it's too perfect."
"Before first year. They wouldn't let me see my Hogwarts letters and burned them all before I could read them. I tried saving one, one time and Uncle Vernon caught me. He burned my back with the poker, but that's the only scar I have from it."
Draco bit his lip, before pressing a soft kiss to the circle. The tense muscles of Harry's back relaxed as he let out a soft sigh. He moved on to kiss the scar on his shoulder, and then to the next one, and to the next one until every scar on Harry's body had been kissed but one.
As Draco went to kiss the last scar, he realized Harry was asleep. Smiling to himself, he pecked the lightning bolt scar on the raven-haired boy's forehead and curled around him in a protective cuddle. Nuzzling his face into Harry's hair, Draco whispered those precious three words before falling into a deep slumber.
"I love you."