Hearing a slamming noise come from my front door I squeezed the trigger even more.
I heard running footsteps searching the house hearing them stop at my bedroom door way.
"Anastasia NO!"
Opening my eyes to see Sebastian I mentally cursed what the hell was his problem. Why did he care so fucking much?
He sprinted toward me and pinned both my arms above my head on the bed. I struggled to get the gun but he grabbed it and threw it across the room.
"Why the fuck do you care so damn much let me fucking go!" I screamed up to him still struggling to get free. I kicked at him with my free legs until he straddled me pinning my whole body down. I was trapped underneath him.
"Why would you try to do that to yourself what are you fucking nuts?!" he yelled down at me grabbing my face trying to make me understand him. His eyes were full of fear and hurt.
"Why would I still want to live after all that has happened to me Sebastian? Huh? Why would I want to live after I saw my parents lifeless bodies in a car wrapped around a tree all mangled and bloody? Or my brother hanging in a fucking mental hospital room with his skin becoming white and starting to smell like death? OR the one man who gave me a reason to live again turned out to be all in my head and I was pulled from that world and the remaining piece of him was killed right in front of me?! Why would anybody have a reason to live after that?!" tears were rushing from my eyes again. They stung like glass scraping against my face.
"Listen to me." He began
"Ruvik would have still wanted you to live. He would have wanted you to feel what he could not. See what he couldn't. He would have wanted the best for you. Not this." He said pointing to the gun that was now across the room.
"Anastasia I lost my little girl, I lost my wife. Do you think I wanted to live? That's why I turned to the booze. I didn't know what to do. But then I met you. You were so full of life. Before we went into STEM you could light up a room with your personality, with your happiness and make me smile. Where is that girl I fell in love with?" My eyes widened at his last words.
"What..?"
"I love you Anastasia."
I was shocked; I didn't know what to say or what to do. This was all just too much, how could he love someone like me after all we have been through or after he knew what kind of monster I was.
"Sebastian…aren't you scared of me..? You know what I can do…I could kill you right now if I wanted to."
"I'm not scared Anastasia, and yes, you could kill me if you wanted to. But I trust you." He whispered down to me.
Blushing I looked away from him.
He got up from over me and sat next to me on the bed and I sat up next to him.
Wrapping an arm around my waist he pulled me closer to him.
I leaned my head on his shoulder avoiding eye contact with him. This was just so sudden…
My eyes started to droop and I suddenly realized how tired I was, I haven't gotten real sleep in days.
Yawning loudly Sebastian looked down at me and I gave him a half asleep fake smile. Smiling down at me he pulled me up to the pillows and onto his chest with his arm still around me. Pulling the covers over us both I was enjoying the warmth.
Slowly but surely I fell asleep to the sound of his breathing.
Laying in an office I slowly examined my surroundings I noticed I was in Ruvik's office.
"Ruvik?!" I nearly screamed his name.
He appeared above me and held out his hand to me.
Grabbing it he pulled me up into a hug.
The hot tears came back again I just wanted to stay here forever with him...embracing me like this. Looking up at his face I saw that his eyes were crying blood like tears.
"I wasn't able to give you a proper goodbye…" he whispered down to me.
"Ru-" I began but he put his finger on my lips silencing me.
"This is the only way you'll be able to see me from time to time, since your brain was once connected to mine some memory still remains of me. But once time passes…you may forget me all together. I can watch over you….But I can't speak with you unless you're asleep. Now. Do not try to kill yourself again woman. You have a life to live, a long prosperous one, and as for Sebastian. He can give you more happiness than I ever could. He's alive as I am not. As much as I want you to be by my side it is merely impossible. As much as I want you all for myself..I would be selfish to ask of you what it takes to be with me."
"What does it take Ruvik?" I whispered up to him looking in those white eyes I've missed dearly.
"For you to end your life. As I said before I don't want you to take away what was ripped from me. You have so much to look forward to."
"But I want to be with you.." I whispered trying not to panic; I didn't want him to leave me again. I wanted to be with him until the end of time not just 'from time to time.'
Putting his thumb on my chin he lifted my face up so I was looking at him.
Smiling down at me he slowly leaned in and kissed me. He kissed me deeply like it was the last time he would ever feel something like this ever again.
Lightly pulling away from me he put his forehead on mine.
"Goodbye Anastasia."
Those were the last words I heard when I woke up.
Regretfully opening my eyes I was still in my bed, but Sebastian wasn't next to me anymore. Was I really that far in dream land that I didn't feel him leave my side?
My nose scrunched up at the smell of eggs and bacon. My stomach grumbled but I didn't want to eat.
My appetite was lost knowing that I couldn't do anything besides kill myself to be with Ruvik.
Frowning I pulled the blankets over me. I didn't want to move let alone eat.
The smell of food was making me sick.
I could only reach for Ruvik…If I killed myself I would leave Sebastian broken and battered again all by himself. He lost Joseph…I don't think he could handle losing me. It would be extremely selfish of me to pull something like that.
Peeking out of the covers I grabbed my remote and turned on my T.V to the news channel.
I looked at the date and realized we've been in STEM for two weeks.
Two whole weeks that seemed like hours in Ruvik's world.
Suddenly A picture of me and Sebastian's faces came into view. I shot upright turning up the volume on the Television.
"New story progresses as the only two survivors to live through the harsh experimenting the company Alas has put these poor people through will be mentally scarred for life." What the hell? Did either of us say that?
A video came on the screen of Sebastian carrying me in his arms through the downpour with me cowering in his chest like a broken doll outside of the building.
"Officer Anastasia Rossi and Detective Sebastian Castellanos seemed to have lived through the whole ordeal but Joseph Oda wasn't fortunate enough and the machine which this sick company used on these people consumed him and eventually he died." I covered my mouth in horror as they showed a picture of Joseph. It was one of the pictures at the officer's ball where his smile could send warmth into the hearts of millions. Oh Joseph…
"Such a sad ordeal isn't it Cindy.."
I shut out the stupid bitches on the news who acted like they actually gave a shit about people. News reporters were emotionless scum that could talk about a child being killed without showing the least bit of remorse. They say things like
"Oh that's so sad."
Or
"Prayers go out to the family"
That fake frown and fake emotion plastered onto their faces as they try and act like they half gave a shit about what's really going on. All they cared about was the money. This world is so corrupt.
I wanted to rip this bitches tongue out just saying Joseph's name. She didn't know who he was so why should she fucking care?
And just like that they moved onto another story. Without a second glance back at what we were put through.
Plopping back onto the pillows I put my hands over my face covering my eyes sighing deeply.
When was this empty feeling in the pit of my chest going to go away?
Never?
Tomorrow?
A year?
A week?
Who fucking knew.
Just then I heard Sebastian enter the room.
"Hey sleeping beauty I cooked you up some breakfast. Your stomach was yelling at me while you were asleep."
"It was very thoughtful of you Sebastian..And kind. But I'm really not hungry…"
The smell of bacon smelled like it was right in front of my face. Peeking through my fingers I saw he was dangling it right under my nose.
"Stop that." I grimaced, Bile rising from my stomach.
"You surreee?" he teased.
"Sebastian sto-" my hands shot to my mouth while I basically flew off the bed to my bathroom heading for the toilet.
Keeping my hair from my face I threw up. Once it started it wouldn't stop. The acid ripping through my esophagus gasping in between gurgles of my own vomit. My eyes teared from the pain that mercilessly wouldn't cease.
If I wasn't in so much agony I think I would have felt a strong hand rubbing my back.
When it was finally over I rolled over onto the cold tiled floor of my bathroom. My body was violently shaking. Chills running through my nerves, I couldn't move.
Looking up at Sebastian I could see worry written all over the man's face.
Placing his hand on my forehead he shook his head.
"Feels like you have a really bad fever going on there Ana."
"I-It's- from…STEM." Gasping after every word as the pain was still in my stomach and the nausea not helping.
"M-my body c-can't take it." It was all so sudden. My body just kind of thrashed out on me. We were in that thing for two damn weeks, without proper food or water. I couldn't imagine the damage it might have caused to our brain tissue. I'm surprised we aren't dead.
I wonder why Sebastian wasn't having this happen to him.
I saw Sebastian get up and walk out the door. After a few seconds he was back with a rag and he wiped off the vomit from my mouth and scooped me up off the floor. Bringing me back to bed he gently put me down and covered me in the blankets.
I was so cold, shivering. I held my arms to my chest trying to warm myself. It wasn't helping anything.
With another rag Sebastian put it on my forehead and it was damp with freezing cold ice water. I went to rip it off my head but his hand grabbed my wrist stopping me.
"It's to soothe the fever. Do you have any medicine in your house?"
I nodded beginning to speak "They're i-in the top right cabinet in the kitchen."
Sebastian half ran out of the room and I heard things being thrown and fiddled with in the kitchen. My stomach felt like it was being ripped apart doubling over I started to rock myself back and forth trying to bring myself comfort but the pain just intensified.
When Sebastian came back into the room I looked up at him.
"Seb I- I think I need to go to the hospital." I felt like it was needed since I could barely breathe or move. The worry in Sebastian's face became more and more apparent and he looked like he was starting to have a panic attack.
He immediately got out his cell phone from his pocket and quickly dialed 9-1-1.
"I need an ambulance sent to 3586 veterans street, my friend is very ill and she has been throwing up and has a very high fever and can't move. Something is wrong. Please come quick." He closed his phone quickly and came over to me, grabbing me from the bed and carrying me to the door. He opened it quickly and we waited outside for the ambulance.
I felt something warm dripping from my nose.
Slowly raising my hand to my face I wiped my nose looking at my hand.
It was blood.
Sebastian looked quickly from my face to my hand and his eyes shot wide.
"These bastards better hurry up." His voice was shaking.
Suddenly my body started to convulse and I couldn't control it. White flashes covered my vision.
My eyes started rolling in the back of my head while my body took over.
~Sebastian P.O.V.~
Her body started jolting in my arms.
Gently putting her on the wooden front porch I held her head up so she wouldn't bash it against the ground.
Seeing flashing lights coming into the distance I sighed in relief, looking back down at Ana's face I noticed white foam like spit was starting to spill from the corners of her mouth and only the whites of her eyes were visible.
The EMT's quickly got out of the Ambulance in a rush seeing what condition she was in. Leaning down to her they quickly put a flash light in her eyes to see if they would follow.
"She's having a seizure, she could go into cardiac arrest if we don't get her out of here now."
The other EMT ran over to the Ambulance getting out a stretcher to take her away to the hospital.
Suddenly Anastasia stopped convulsing and the EMT let go of her.
In an instant it started up again and she slammed her head against the ground.
Hard.
Cursing and putting his hand under her head again the other man with the stretcher finally made it over to the house. Gently picking her up they put her on the stretcher wheeling her to the ambulance.
Getting in the back of the ambulance with the other EMT the driver closed the doors. Hearing the siren start we sped off.
The man put a breathing mask over her and injected her with something.
"What is that..?" I asked skeptical.
"A sedative, it will help relax her muscles causing the seizure to cease." He explained
Eventually her body slowly stopped convulsing and the heart monitor went into a steady beat.
Scooting over to her I started caressing her face.
"You'll be okay Ana I promise…"
When the Ambulance finally arrived to the hospital I followed the EMT's into the hospital. Nurses rushed over taking in her condition.
"We need to get her into surgery now."
Surgery…?
I started to follow the nurses to the surgery room but one grabbed me by the sleeve.
"I'm sorry Sir but you're going to have to wait in the waiting room."
I stared blankly at her in the face and put my head down walking away to the lobby.
Sitting in a chair I put my head in my hands.
"Please be okay…" whispering to myself I felt like I lost another person I cared about in my life.
Time ticked away. The only sounds that I heard in the waiting room were cries and pleas for help. The sound of the clock as it ticked away the minutes.
Looking up at the clock I realized it had been three hours since I've been waiting here.
Just as I was about to get up and see what was taking so damn long the same nurse that pulled me aside earlier was standing in front of me.
Her face was grim.
My heart sunk and fell to the floor.
What happened?
Where was Anastasia?
"Are you with the girl that was wheeled in here not too long ago?" she asked, sadness in her voice.
"Yes…Detective Castellanos. Where is she?"
I half didn't want to get an answer.
"Follow me Detective." She asked with her head down starting to lead the way.
Entering the actual hospital we passed by elderly people on their death beds. Gunshot victims, people with deadly diseases that were incurable.
I hated hospitals. They are here to remind me that this is going to be me one day.
When we finally reached her room I wanted to yell. Scream. I was horrified of what I saw.
Walking over to her and sitting in the seat next to her hospital bed tears escaped my eyes.
She had a breathing tube down her throat with a machine helping her breathe.
Her hair was shaved off and bandages covered the majority of her head.
"I'm sorry Detective but the doctors did all they could, so much brain tissue was damaged from the trauma of the machine. We knew who it was as soon as she was wheeled in here; her face is all over the news."
"So…what are you telling me..?" wanting to get a clear answer as to what happened.
"Since the trauma was so severe it put her into a coma.." she answered being careful to what she said knowing I was going to have a break down any second.
"For how long." That was a stupid rhetorical question. I mentally slapped myself.
"Only time can tell. Could be days..weeks…years..or….I'm sorry to tell you this but never."
I nodded trying not to lose grip and break down.
Why did this shit have to happen?
"I'll leave you two be." She nodded towards me and slowly left the room.
Looking over to Anastasia I felt the pain in my heart worsen.
Grabbing her lifeless hand and squeezing it I whispered:
"Please come back to me."