Butterflies fluttered in Chessebelle's stomach as she sat down after recieving her squad assignment for the Gotei 13. Tears were beginning to well in her eyes as she returned from the stage where Head-Captain Genryusai Yamamoto gave her his congratulations and his orders. She wasn't sad or nervous, the butterflies and tears were coming from a different beast altogether that had flowed through her veins since she failed her Shin'o Academy exam for the Gotei 13 the first time.
She was embarrassed. Her face, as always, was a blank slate with slate blue eyes looking ahead at the next person to be given their orders and station within the Gotei 13.
It was a mistake that she was even in the Gotei 13. She should've never been allowed to join after she had failed the test, again and again. She was useless and always would be, but that fateful day at the testing center had given her an opportunity she couldn't refuse. She was desperate for a way out of the Rukongai, to give her family a better life, to find true purpose for her life and she greedily switched her exam with someone else's at the last moment.
Chessebelle let the tears fall, landing on her assignment papers. The water was absorbed by the parchment, feathering out as the paper drank it deep.
It was an accident that she was here and now serving to protect soul's lives within the Seireitei. It was an accident that she was praised for her incredible intellect and exceptional kido skills. It was an accident that she ever stepped foot in the Shin'o academy.
She would never be anything but an accident-a stain on the otherwise pristine selection of candidates for the Gotei 13, similar to the way her tears were tainting her own assignment papers.