A/N: For my convenience I've made Santana's Abuela her mother's mother- just go with it. We didn't learn she was her father's mother until season 6 I don't think. So after my canon divergence.
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Kurt POV )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
There are 2000 hopeful performers auditioning for A Chorus Line reboot. It is a musical primary for dancers, so I'm a bit of a long shot. I've been working on my moves since getting into NYADA. The creators are modernizing the jazz ballet and adding contemporary dancing for this musical. Which doesn't exactly increase my prospects. But the way I see it is; every audition is an opportunity to shine and a wonderful experience. Just to step up on that stage where the greats who have come before me have stood… a dream come true. I can learn, get my face out there, and I really do adore A Chorus Line.
Of the 17 main characters, there are no less three gay men. When it premiered in 1975, it was a big deal. I love the stories, Greg is a veteran dancer, he knows Cassie, he's the first to go to Ben's aid when he goes down. He is usually cast as one of the veteran dancers and is very East-side New York.
Or maybe he'd be better to go out for Bobby Mills. Who is from upstate New York in a small conservative town he blocked out the name of. He went to school in 'jock city' and his athletic father was disappointed he sucked at sports, to the point he'd tell his friends Bobby had polio. Bobby found some relief breaking into people's houses and rearranging their furniture or setting stuff on fire. His desire to get out of a small town, and chase his dreams and not apologize for who he is, I love that. Bobby has that kind of deadpan humor that comes from having to deal with a lot of… BS. Unfortunately, neither is a heavy singing role. I won't get any solos, just part of the 'Hello 12, Hello 13, Hello Love song', or half a verse in 'Movie Star'. But still. It would be an honor. A Chorus Line is one of the longest running musicals of all time. The likes of people who have played these roles, on this stage, in the iconic gold sequins, the top hats, doing the One song in perfect unison.
Santana has been helping me, we've been meeting up most days. She's been cage dancing at this lesbian bar on First Avenue. I'm helping her with the tap combination, since I've been taking that as one of my performance classes at NYADA. The iconic 'I hope I get it' song is still the same, but the dancing that is being done is a contemporary hip-hop lyrical fusion. Quite different from the original musical's jazz routine.
But since it's a chorus open call, and the main thing they are looking for is dancers, they call us to the stage in groups of 30 and we have about 15 minutes to learn the start of the dance while they watch us. Our technique, how fast we are picking it up, our grace, flexibility, co-ordination, are all being scrutinized by a meticulous panel of dance instructors and choreographers. They have been seeing 200 dancers a day for the past two weeks.
Then there is the singing audition. It's in the afternoon. Each audition will only be one minute. And then it will be more grueling dance auditions. Half of everyone will get cut today. We'll find out over the weekend, who made it to the next round. Rachel looked pretty good during the ballet and jazz ballet rounds, but she's no contemporary dancer either. She doesn't particularly like this musical anyway, it's kind of the opposite of everything she likes about musicals. It's a big ensemble piece, Cassie, arguably the lead female role, only gets one song and a monologue. The songs are simple and not even sung that well in the original because the choreography is so demanding. In short, it's not really for her. But it's all a wonderful experience regardless.
Dion De Lasso is the main choreographer, he's one of Michael Bennett's contemporaries. He's dreamy, with dark hair, long sideburns and thick lashes. With a body like Mike Chang, sleek and muscular, tall yet slight. He dresses like James Dean. And, like Mike, he is a fleet-footed dance master. Rumor has it, Priscilla Lopez, the original Diana Morales, the real person the character was based on, will be helping with the casting and staging. I haven't laid eyes on her yet, but I will have to try not to be overwhelmed when it does happen!
They call us up to the stage by our numbers, how meta!
Here goes…
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Santana POV ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Lady Hummel got cut in round one. Unsurprisingly. You can't make up for years of dance lessons that quickly. Well, Berry wanted to go out for Cassie, but they grouped her with the potential Bebe Benzenheimer's. Oh, ouch, that one's gotta sting, Hobbit! But she's made it to the second round. Whatever!
I was grouped with the Diana's, naturally. I may not have seen A Chorus Line until recently and am not that into Broadway in general. It just doesn't speak to me the way 90s RnB does. I mean, it's saccharine show tunes skipped to on stage to be enjoyed by grandmas on Saturday matinees. Broadway is old style whimsy, meets Elton John-esque flamboyance, in this warped world of always happy, over the top, shiny people doing ridiculous shit. And it's super white and bourgie. Paying $100 for the crappy seats, is not something regular folk can and will do. But, A Chorus Line is something else. For starters, it doesn't piss me off. It's real. It's about real people, telling their stories, trying to make it in this competitive, shit hole of a world. Like really profound… I can see why it won a Pulitzer. And Diana's totes my girl! The way girlfriend got bullied at drama school and it made her hard. But she didn't let them racists stop her… That Nothing song… goosebumps! Kurt has a bootleg of the original 1975 cast performing. It's so good. He explained the 1985 movie is sacrilege. So, I didn't bother watching it.
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Finn POV )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Finn attended the wrap party alone. It was more extravagant than he'd expected. And he'd let the free flowing booze go to his head. The filming was quite segmented, he'd been in the same show as Denise Richards for 8 weeks, but he hadn't actually met her until this evening. Jennifer had introduced him to her boyfriend, Warwick, who was actually a cool guy. They'd talked sports most of the evening. Finn talked about Santana non-stop. He was sad she couldn't be here, but was proudly telling anyone who'd listen she was down to the final seven Velma's for the revival of Chicago.
He was flying back out to New York tomorrow, they'd have less than a week, hopefully Santana would find out she had callbacks for Chicago and A Chorus Line, before they had to hightail it to Lima to help Glee Club prepare for Nationals.
)))))))))))))
Finn caught an early flight, so he'd see Santana before her audition. After their 'I haven't seen you in a week' make up sex, Finn had wanted to crash. But Santana looked a little tense.
"Are you nervous?"
"No!" She replied, as if insulted.
Testy.
"You feel tight," Finn rubbed her shoulders, encouraging her to lie on her stomach on the bed.
He worked his way down to her foot. Slowly. Massages were best given slow, but he felt he may have been stringing this out for less noble reasons. She had her eyes closed now, and actually did look at peace.
There is no good way to say this. She was going to be pissed. And he was a little bit happy.
"Um, so, my mom ran into yours at the grocery store."
She turned back to him. The crease in her forehead and sudden anxious foreboding expression said Santana didn't like where this was going already.
))))))))))))))FLASH TO CAROLE AND MARIBEL running into each other ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
"Mrs Lopez?" Carole had stopped her cart in front of the freezers, gesturing to herself, "So nice to see you again."
The older woman looked entirely blank.
Carole felt incredibly awkward now, "Carole… Hudson-Hummel… I'm Finn's Mom."
"Yes, of course!" The elegant, older woman recovered well, to say, "Call me Maribel." She leaned in for a polite kiss on both cheeks in Spanish fashion.
"It's nice to see you," Carole tried to keep the other woman talking.
"How have you been?"
"Adjusting to an empty nest… now that my boys are scattered," Carole admitted a little sadly, before spontaneously adding, "You know, we should go for coffee and catch up."
Maribel seemed to think that was out of left field, before looking like she was coming up with a polite excuse.
Carole insisted, "We should make an effort, especially now."
The stylish woman remained well-mannered, but couldn't help but enquire, "Why now?" The older woman spoke as if she had no idea what Carole was referring to.
"Oh, you know… now that my son is dating your daughter."
But she didn't know. Maribel Lopez stopped entirely, and looked at Carole as if she were embarrassed for her, "I think you might be confused… my daughter is Santana. I… umm… seriously doubt she's dating your son."
Carole was incredulous, "...for about two months now."
"Santana…" Maribel was tongued tied, "how do I say this… isn't interested in the… affections of men."
"Yeah, I know all about… her and Brittany in high school…" Carole just didn't know when to stop talking, "…but Santana's been dating Finn since March."
"March?!" Santana's mother looked as if she wanted to accuse Carole of lying, but she was really studying her face. Then she just looked angry. She pulled out her phone, clearly having changed her mind, "Carole, I think we should catch up."
And after Carole had given her number and sent the 'testing the waters' return text, Maribel had asked for Finn's number too. And as soon as they went their separate ways, Santana's mother appeared to speed her daughter. She spoke in hushed, angry tones in Spanish so Carole wasn't able to relay anything further to Finn hours later when they had spoken. But it had already been too late by then anyhow.
Mrs Lopez had already called and invited Finn to dinner saying, 'since he was Santana's boyfriend for the last few months, they all wanted to meet him.' And of course, Finn had agreed, happily. Not realizing that Maribel was having him unwittingly confirm it.
)))))))))))))))))))))))))) Back in the present )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Santana had yanked her foot away from him, and probably wanted to start kicking him.
"What was I supposed to say?" Finn felt defensive.
Santana was ready with witty banter, "Um, it's weird my girlfriend's mom is inviting me to family dinner." She was using hand gestures, which usually meant she was madder than she was trying to let on.
Finn shrugged, conceding only a little, "Okay fine, but you know what else is weird," Finn felt himself getting testy, "that my girlfriend didn't tell her mom that we're going out."
Santana looked upset, but her tone was testy, "She already gave me a two-hour long lecture about 'not including her in my life', she rolled her eyes as she relayed it, "and being 'disrespectful'," Santana punctuated her words with air quotes. "So, I already know."
"I like your mom," Finn admitted, "My mom knows plenty, I gush about how awesome you are to her all the time."
Santana pulled another face, to demonstrate she was grossed out, "Your mother issues aside, I don't want my family in on this, and we need to think up a good excuse to get you out of Sunday."
"I wanna meet your folks."
"No, you don't, you just think you want to meet them."
"Look, I know stuff is strained…" Finn reasoned, "but surely your dad will behave himself in front of company."
"The fact that you think that is true, Dorothy, is exactly why you should get high rather than come to Lopez family dinner."
But Finn didn't think that was it. Santana didn't want him to see how they treat her. She'd kept school and home so separate. Santana ruled that school, head cheerleader, glee, prom court two years in a row, free ride to college on a cheerleading scholarship. She'd dated all the hottest boys, and walked the halls with her girlfriend senior year and no one dared make fun of her to her face. Her reputation as the top bitch, you didn't mess with, proceeded her. All done with an aura of mystery surrounding her family and where she lived. Everyone knew she lived in Lima Heights Adjacent, but practically no one at the school lived there. She must have lived right on the border or zoning wouldn't have allowed her to attend McKinley High.
Finn appealed to her, "I wanna know you," Finn finally said, "I want to know all of you. Not just the parts you're happy for me to see, but everything."
"Finn, you don't get it…"
"I'll be there for you."
"How do I put this… in geek language you might understand… you know Javert from Les Misérables?"
He'd dated Rachel, so of course he'd watched it more than once.
"They based him on my dad, true story," She informed him, kidding but not.
Finn inched closer, pulling her into a hug, "Consider me warned."
Santana motioned and did the sound effects for a bomb exploding, just to be over-the top-dramatic.
It's not going to be that bad. Meeting the parents is always awkward. He remembered for a moment that grating dinner at Quinn's house, where he'd lost his mind and sung that song about her having his baby. He got her kicked out of home. At least it won't be that bad.
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))Santana POV ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
What is the Broadway equivalent of a screen test? That's what today is. They had gone all out. She was in a full flapper costume, with beadwork and everything. She had on a wig that was the signature dark bob. Santana had been two and a half hours in hair and make-up, and when she'd finally gotten a look at herself she'd gasped. Her half Puerto Rican, a quarter Black ass, looked 100% cracker. What the actual fuck!
She'd sung Anything Goes Patti Lupone-style. Kurt had been helping her prep. He knew every vocal trick and arrangement of Ms LuPone's entire career, that he could nauseatingly recite, without being asked. And she'd nailed it yet again. But for some reason, this time, the vibe in the room was different. She couldn't put her finger on it. Columbo wasn't rooting for her anymore, he looked pissed. Johnny Depp was still drooling over her, and the director seemed forlorn.
She did another monologue, this one from Bonnie and Clyde, another chance to show off her 1920s-style, Chicagoan accent to impress them. But they were an impervious wall.
What the fuck?
I just kicked that song square in the balls. Why can't they see it!
"Santana," Pete the director invited her to come closer so they could ask her a few more questions.
She did, starting to feel like she was naked, but didn't realize it or something. She checked her costume just to make sure. No wardrobe malfunctions here.
"We did some background on you, Ms Lopez."
Why is he saying it like that? Like he wants me to come clean? What are they, the FBI?
I haven't been caught doing most of the bad shit I've gotten up to so I don't know what the fuck he's referring… but then she waited. Feeling her heart stop in her chest and a chill settle over her whole body.
"We came across some ads, Ohio congressional campaign ads…" Columbo said, the disappointment evident, like his favorite daughter had been disqualified from Miss Universe for having had a secret love child.
Fuck!
And then the look of disgust settled on her, "Care to comment?"
They don't want a lesbian playing Velma Kelly. Fuck all of you! Isn't Broadway the home of the gays or some shit?
Her whole body locked in anger, as she crossed her arms. Her neck grew stiff with rage.
Santana responded firmly, "Who I do off stage, is none of your business."
Not old enough, not white enough and now I'm not straight enough either!
"Of course Ms Lopez, that not our concern."
Then what is?
Just the mention of her outing sent Santana into a rage. It had taken her a long time to move passed it. Santana had thought she'd forgiven Finn pretty quickly, but his offer of friendship had been too hard on her end. Not blaming him for everything, wasn't the same as 'let's hang out'. It wasn't until she saw him at the wedding looking ready to pack life in, that she'd finally, truly let it go. Sue was the one who had set the mudslinging tone, and Saliszar and his homophobic niece at the school were responsible for her 'declaration of lesbianism' on TV. So not only did her parents have to find out ahead of her schedule, but they got to find out with the rest of the world judging her too.
Dad had been surprisingly better about it than she'd dared hope, but that had its own complication. Mom was awesome, as always. Because while it was easy to sing songs of acceptance within the walls of the choir room, for the next three months she kept getting recognized everywhere, by total strangers, and she could hear their hushed whispers and see the fingers pointing, and some were cruder still and would yell "dyke" out of passing cars. Even at college, some people had recognized her from those stupid ads. Some of the girls on the Cards squad had been less than welcoming at first. But nothing compared to Abuela's rejection. But she figured that had always been coming. She'd wanted to wait, Christmas first year of college had been her plan. She wanted to be out of the house, then slowly drop more and more hints in the lead up to telling her Abuelita and her parents that first Christmas, it was after all, a family holiday. And she was their family and they were stuck with her. She'd wanted to do it on her terms though and she'd been robbed of that. But what's done is done, and Abuelita would probably have still reacted the same no matter when Santana had told her. But this had thrown her.
The creative director was saying something, and Santana tried to tune back in.
"We just don't think you're a good fit for Velma," Said Columbo, barely making eye contact.
I was never gonna fuck you anyway, Woody Allen try-hard!
"You're not the right image for Broadway," Pete the director, poked his finger of salt into her open wound and twisted.
Andrea and her bun were now saying something, no doubt her old, prim-and-proper ass was relishing in getting to tell Santana she didn't belong. That was the message she'd been getting one way or another her whole life. What's one more time really?
Snixx had barely been able to stop herself from dressing them all down to the point of making them cry. And she could have done it. That was her superpower. But going nuclear wasn't smart. She knew that, and yet it was so tempting.
Santana couldn't remember leaving the theatre, or the ride back to the budget motel room. She had collapsed two steps inside the door, and just started sobbing.
It's just not fair.
She really hated to cry in front of other people, but it had just erupted out of her, and she couldn't stop it any longer. Her chest hurt so bad. And then Finn was there, and she was lying on the bed, and he was holding her and she was just making wounded animal sounds because she couldn't form words yet. Finn hadn't said much in the end, which she appreciated. Any platitudes about 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger' were likely to be met with physical violence.
Needless to say, she'd gotten the rejection text message from Chicago that evening.
When does it get to get easier?
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))Finn POV)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Santana was really bummed about Chicago. Making the final five was huge. She'd practically been guaranteed to get something, chorus at least. She hadn't really admitted what had happened. And he hadn't been able to get a straight answer out of her.
She'd just kept whispering between clenched teeth, 'It's just not fair.'
They didn't have long to dwell on it. She had a week before another round of A Chorus Line Reboot, and now they were headed back to Lima to help Glee Club. There was plenty to be hopeful about. Finn had met Santana's mother a number of times, and he'd always found her to be supportive and kind. And Santana called her about once a week since moving to L.A. On the other hand, he'd only met Manuel Lopez in passing once, at graduation. Santana never talked about him, and she hadn't called or texted him once in the time Finn had been seeing her. He wasn't sure what to make of the man, or what to expect from this evening.
Finn had never been to Santana's house before. He'd been into the homes of most of the Glee Club members he went to school with. But Santana was the one who'd always made excuses, like that Lima Heights Adjacent was too rough and far for the club members to go to. The likes of Kurt wouldn't last five minutes there. When the Cheerios won nationals senior year, it was customary for the head cheerleader to throw the victory party. Santana had organized for the celebration to be at Brittany's house. She clearly didn't want anyone meeting her family.
Finn realized he hadn't been to Lima Heights adjacent, but as Santana drove their 'rent-a-bomb' closer, he began to make a few observations. It was poorer, more built up, more ethnic and had noticeably more graffiti and burnt out cars lining the streets. But he liked row houses, he found there to be something comforting about everyone getting the same. Most were two to three stories high, with metal fire escapes off the backside where there were wire fences. Santana took some backstreets, was quick to honk the horn and indicators were clearly just a suggestion.
She's stressed.
He couldn't help but think she was majorly overreacting. The Lopez home was on a cleaner street, with less bars on the windows. Part of a slightly newer set of row houses. Santana zipped down an alley and parked their rented crap pile on wheels in a secret spot.
Santana had repeatedly stated that it would be the 'dinner of awkwardness', and they would just need to endure it. It was after all, a special occasion, her father's 60th birthday. And all he wanted was a family dinner.
Finn kept wiping his hands on his grey 'old man' pants. He wanted to look better than jeans and flannel if Mr Lopez was as bad as Santana implied. Mrs Lopez opened the door, with open arms she cried, "My baby!" And she and Santana hugged and kissed on both cheeks. "Finn, come in and be welcome," She smiled kindly and stepped aside.
A short, balding man, wearing 1950's style wingtip glasses, and a brown tweed suit with a vest came forward. He kind of looked and dressed like George Costanza from Seinfeld, but Latino. This is him? He's not scary… like at all. Maybe because Santana had built him up in Finn's mind, he was expecting someone taller?
"Hi Dad," Santana had no sense of warmth to her greeting, this was obligation, "Happy Birthday." She handed him the envelope with a card and gift certificate she'd gotten him.
"Thank you," He smiled and pulled her into an awkward hug. She turned her face away from him.
"You must be Finn," The older man offered his hand.
"Mr Lopez, thank you for having me in your home," Finn practically jumped at the opportunity to shake his hand, with double-handed enthusiasm, then instantly regretted it, given how sweaty his palms were. Before gawkily adding, "Sir."
"Come," gestured Manuel to the lounge room where everyone was sitting around a coffee table.
"Carlito," Mirabel seemed proud to announce, "This is Finn, Finn, Carlito."
"Ha! PAY UP!" Angel declared victory, "Told you, he was a HE!"
"Do not make fun of your sister!" Manuel scalded.
Angel looked shamed at his father's words… for about two seconds.
"And the smart ass is Angel," Manuel introduced.
All Finn could remember about Carlito was that he was the oldest, and Santana had called him a boring accountant. He also looked the most like Manuel. But a more modern dresser, and wasn't bald… yet. He had his partner with him. Her name was Elena. She seemed polite and sweet, with wild flowing dark curls. She was dressed like she has just been to Church, with a prominent crucifix on display at her neckline.
"So, Finn," Angel was clearly angling for something, "How long have you known Santana for?"
"Since high school."
"Really? So, you know all about… her ex?" Angel spoke as if alerting Finn to something 'seemingly scandalous'.
"If you mean Brittany, then yes," Finn ensured he remained nonplussed, "we were all in Glee Club together." He didn't want her brother to have the satisfaction of his shock or whatever he'd been going for. On the other hand, Angel had graduated college last year and worked in insurance. He was better looking, and more concerned about his appearance, he had bling on his wrist. More cocky and judgmental, Finn would guess.
Santana was shifting her eyes in a way that suggested she wanted him to disengage from her brother immediately.
"Santana knows she doesn't need to pretend to like boys," Manuel added looking at Santana pointedly.
He thinks I'm her beard.
"Papi, Finn…" Santana began to explain.
"I really am her boyfriend," Finn blurted out, before instantly regretting speaking.
Santana glared at him and shook her head, with only the slightest of movements, as if embarrassed he'd just said that.
He glanced at both her parents, wondering how they took the news. Finn had had no idea until Rachel had said there was a prom queen candidate spending time in her closet, and then after he'd said Quinn wasn't claustrophobic, she'd explained what she'd actually meant. And even then, Finn had thought Rachel was making that up. He'd after all had sex with Santana. And while she wasn't the slightest bit warm about it, she did appear attracted to him, and to like sex itself, provided he didn't annoy her by talking. Santana seemed the epitome of a powerful, sexy woman who knew what she wanted and took it. He just didn't see how her being a lesbian fit into that. But after that, he began to watch her more closely. The looks and touches she and Brittany were always shooting each other. And how, when it was just the club, she was more outwardly sensitive to Brittany.
Did they already know? Had it been a shock? And they'd had to deal with the fallout of those horrible campaign ads. All because he'd completely overreacted to her childish insults. So, it wasn't just Santana telling them she was a lesbian, every man and his dog in Ohio knew their daughter was 'the gay cheerleading captain' at that school.
"Is she even gay, now?" Angel commented.
Santana's head snapped around, and she took a big breath clearly about to give her brother a piece of her mind. "You know what, who I date is not for you to stick a label on, that's what you have to do so you feel less threatened about what I am!"
Carlito proceeded to make it worse, but he didn't appear to mean it meanly, "So you're bi now?"
Santana let fly with a string of insults in Spanish Finn couldn't quite catch but he was pretty sure she called her oldest brother ignorant.
"Both of you, stop it!" Maribel cut through the building tension. "Santana, come help me in the kitchen."
Santana rolled her eyes. She'd warned Finn her family were stuck in the 1950s and he didn't get what she'd meant at the time, but he was starting to understand.
Manuel looked at Santana when he spoke, "I'm just glad that the girl who ran around with a different boy every week, wasn't who she really is."
He didn't like her being promiscuous. But accepted her being a lesbian.
Santana stifled her annoyance at his remark, though Finn thought he meant it kindly, rather than backhanded. Then she begrudgingly followed Maribel into the kitchen.
Elena taught kindergarten, and attended the same church as the Lopez family, and she was clearly deemed suitable by Mr Lopez. She was as nice as she appeared. But she had more to her than that, Finn spoke to her alone for a few minutes and she said her hobbies included travel, she'd backpacked through Nepal by herself, which was pretty cool as far as he was concerned.
And then men announced the football was on and sat around the TV in the lounge. But they meant soccer. Finn sat down, but this really wasn't his game, he barely understood the offside rule. And it was so low scoring. Maribel brought in some ripe plantains, so at least that was good.
They were so into it. Messi was playing, and they all loved him. Barcelona was playing some team in white. It was supposed to be an important game. Finn tried to keep up, but he was bored.
Finn swung open the kitchen door, seeing Santana standing from behind, frozen, her arms still crossed. Then he saw what she was seeing. Her grandma was bent over a large roast pork, fresh from the oven. All Finn could see was her navy dress from behind, as she bent over tapping the skin to check the crispiness of the crackle.
They hadn't spoken in a year and a half. Santana had refused to talk about her abuela so far, except a single off-hand comment about her cooking at Fiesta Broadway. Santana's father had only been a qualified doctor practicing in the United States since she was 10 years old. Before then the family had struggled, both Manuel and Maribel had worked many hours a week for bad pay, and that had been the reason Maribel's mother came from Puerto Rico to help with the kids. Santana had known her grandma as the main adult in her life. Santana had mentioned her grandma to Finn in Junior Year, describing her with pride as 'one tough fuckin' lady'. Finn could recall it even now, though there was nothing amazing about that day, just a few club members hanging around the lockers. What stood out for him, was that Finn hadn't heard Santana complement anyone except Brittany up to that point.
Back in the Lopez family kitchen, Santana seemed to pull herself together, getting a long glass from the cupboard, and Coke from the fridge. She asked Finn if he wanted one too. She poured two glasses, before disappearing into the walk-in pantry for unknown reasons for a weirdly long amount of time.
Mrs Lopez looked nervous trying to smooth over all the rough edges presented by this group of people being forced into each other's orbits tonight. "So, Finn, do you like ripe plantains?" Santana's Mom offered him more tasty appetizers.
He took a handful and began chewing noisily, clearly the way to show appreciation in this house, was to need to loosen one's pants after a good meal. Mrs Lopez had out the 'fancy platter', his Mom had one too, only seen on special occasions. And she was serving out the rice and beans. She appeared incredibly nervous and needed to occupy her hands with something.
Abuela was up, clearly hearing his name and wanting to get a look at him. She was a lot smaller in person than he'd been expecting too.
"You're Santana's boyfriend?" She said looking at him sternly, "the one we know nothing about?"
Finn just said, "I'm Finn." He just stood there like an idiot, wondering if she was about to tell him to bend down and say 'ahhh' so she could inspect him.
"I'm Mrs Castillo to you," She held out her hand, and Finn took it. Was he supposed to kiss her hand? He didn't.
She turned to Maribel, and said, "He's handsome." But she said it in Spanish. Finn had taken Mr Schue's class enough to know that much.
"Well, Finn, you're a nice young man," Santana's grandma said to him now, "I am happy Santana has you in her life."
And he'd blushed.
Santana was out of the pantry, now taking a long swig from her soda glass having given Finn his. Santana's face pulled taut, a sign she was annoyed. "You don't know Finn from a bar of soap," Santana snapped, "as far as you're concerned, Finn has the only requirement you're interested in, a dick!"
Her mother warned her sternly, "Santana!"
"Cock is overrated," Santana stated facetiously, "You two should really branch out."
Santana didn't wait for her grandma's response, she pulled Finn back into the lounge room. Finn could only imagine the face she must have been pulling now.
The men had now moved into the dining room. The table had been set nicely, with a table cloth and decorations and everything. No doubt done by Maribel or abuela.
Manuel had some aged scotch and was pouring glasses for both his sons into fancy brandy glasses with ice, stirring with thin glass poles instead of a spoon like normal people. Finn was trying to be on his best behavior.
"How old are you, Finn?"
He didn't know why instead of just saying 19, he replied, "Three days older than Santana," But he did.
"Underage," Manuel commented.
"No scotch for you," Carlito smiled, not sorry at all.
Finn was here to defend Santana, and he was starting to feel like this was a mind field, unsure of where to put his foot at any moment. The last thing he wanted to do was add alcohol to what was already tense and unpredictable.
Mrs Lopez came out with the roast vegetables, and Elena had the rice and beans.
Finn sat and sipped his soda. Hoping they'd all go on discussing the vintage or something and forget all about him.
"So, Finn, what do you do?" Angel asked as if he already knew.
"I'm an actor, I'm on The Bold and the Beautiful… right now," He added as an afterthought.
None of them seemed impressed in the slightest.
But he was saved from having to endure further questioning.
"Manny, come carve for us," Abuela signaled him, placing the huge platter of roast pork on the serving table.
Manuel got up, taking the carving knife and fork and began to cut slices of the meat as Finn watched. This is the routine. This is his castle and he insists on being the one to dole out the food. Burt liked to carve at their home now, and Finn had always expected that one day, he'd do the same, but watching this display now made him question that. Maribel and Abuela had done all the work, why shouldn't they be the ones serving it out with pride, receiving all the complements?
Mrs Lopez busied herself serving out the plantains, rice, beans and roast vegetables onto the plates she then handed to her husband. Finn was given a very generous helping. He'd always been a big eater though, so it was much appreciated. Santana had a tiny helping. Abuela looked about to comment on it, then wisely held her tongue.
Then all the food was served out and they were all sitting around the table. Finn was next to Santana. Manuel was the head, with Maribel as his queen. Abuela was next to Elena and Santana's Mom. Manuel had his sons flanking him, and Elena was next to Carlito, and Santana was next to Angel and Finn was on Mrs Lopez's left.
Finn had been about to dig in, when Santana grabbed his wrist.
"I will say grace," Manuel announced.
And suddenly they were all holding hands.
"For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful, Amen."
"Amen." They repeated in unison afterward.
Finn missed the cue being unfamiliar with Christian traditions.
And then they were all eating.
Everyone was oddly formal and quiet for the first couple of minutes. It was really good. And the crackling was the best part.
"So, Finn," Abuela turned to him, "What church do you go to?"
Finn had not been expecting that question.
"I don't. I'm not religious," He admitted truthfully, feeling like he was not giving the 'right' answer.
Santana stiffened in her chair, staring at her food. Abuela looked annoyed, before passively aggressively going back to her food.
Maribel stepped in, "Finn is very civic-minded, Mami," She spoke to Abuela, "He volunteered his time with the Glee club for much of the school year, and now they are on their way to nationals in L.A. next week."
Alma Castillo turned to her granddaughter, "And Santana, how have you been?"
Santana said nothing and kept on eating.
"Abuelita asked you a question," Her father reminded her.
"Oh, I'm sorry, do you want me to fill you in on the whole 18 months you haven't been speaking to me, or just the last few days?" Santana snarked, "And while we're at it, to what do I owe the pleasure of you deigning to speak to me again? Because I still like girls."
Abuela didn't get a chance to answer.
"Your Abuela is making an effort, Santana," Manuel shushed her, "the least you could do is be polite, and show some respect."
Santana clenched her teeth, looking ready to explode.
Boring and safe topics were talked about by Mrs Lopez and Carlito. And Finn was relieved, and hoping they could just get through the meal with no more sniping.
Carlito announced he had bought a new car, "I finally sold the trusty Toyota Corolla Papi bought me."
Finn was surprised by that.
"I buy all my children a car for their sweet sixteenth," Manuel explained for Finn's benefit, nonchalant, as he continued to cut his meat.
"That's very generous, Sir," Finn addressed the older man clumsily.
"Nice cars, worth $10,000," Manuel continued.
Santana drives a bomb, the one she's had since she was sixteen. No way that cost ten grand! Finn thought, or maybe he didn't buy her one? Maybe Daddy Lopez only bought cars for his sons, the ones that were his real children?
"Papi!" Santana warned, sounding pissed.
"You've repeatedly said you aren't ashamed," Mr Lopez replied evenly, ignoring how irritated Santana was becoming.
Santana shot her Dad a look that he'd seen her give Rachel, like she wanted to turn him to stone with her expression alone. And Finn began to wonder what he'd stepped in the middle of.
It was like Mr Lopez was reading his mind. "You're wondering how that 1990 Ford Laser Santana drives could possibly be worth that much, aren't you, Finn?"
Finn looked at his plate, because he had been thinking that, and he didn't want to lie, but he didn't want to appear to be agreeing with Mr Lopez either.
"I bought her a 2 year-old Volkswagon Beatle," Her dad explained, "Registered, good engine, had only done 10,000 miles, full service history."
Finn was officially lost.
"Don't!" Santana was getting more pissed off by the second.
"What happened to that lovely car, you ask?" Mr Lopez didn't really need Finn to talk, "Santana sold it, on Craig's List, for cash."
"Oh, okay," Finn's eyes shifted to look at Santana, who was shaking her head.
"You gave me that car as a present," Santana retorted cattily, "therefore, it was mine to do with as I saw fit."
"Drop it, both of you," Maribel pleaded.
Santana's mother seemed worn down by whatever power struggle was going on.
"And what did she see fit, you ask?" Her father was impervious to the fact that Santana and his wife clearly wanted him to stop talking.
Finn felt his stomach clench.
"She purchased her fake breasts," Manuel looked Finn right in the eye, before he shook his head sadly.
Finn had actually been curious how Santana had afforded her cosmetic surgery, since she didn't really seem rich, for someone who's dad was a doctor. I guess that explains it.
"It's my body," Santana protested, "My life!"
"And what does that action say about you? Your life and what you value?" He stated rather than asked, "That vanity is the most important thing to you?"
"I don't need your approval," Her face became clenched in anger, she crossed her arms and stared back.
There was something very unsettling happening. And Finn kind of wished they hadn't come here.
"Actually, you did," Mr Lopez countered calmly, "you were under 18, which meant the law required you to have parental permission."
He turned back to Finn now, "She told her Abuela she was getting her wisdom teeth out,"
"Oh," Finn said neutrally, feeling extremely uncomfortable.
Finn could feel the hairs on his neck sticking up, and a cool sweat breaking.
"Tricked Abuelita into signing the guardian paperwork, didn't you," Manuel said plainly pointedly looking at his daughter, not even raising his voice. He was very tranquil for someone who was clearly still pissed about what she'd done well over three years ago.
"I don't have to justify myself to you," Santana snapped back.
But Manuel ignored her entirely, speaking only to Finn, "My wife and I were away for three weeks over the summer, by the time we came back, it was done!"
"Oh," Was all Finn said, careful not to express judgement either way.
"Manny," Maribel urged, "this is not dinner conversation."
Manuel seemed ready for that argument too, "He's her boyfriend, he should know the truth."
Santana dropped her cutlery and it clanged loudly on her plate, causing everyone to stop and the atmosphere became very tense.
"Finn," Maribel sounded exceptionally nervous, "I hear you are doing very well in L.A.!" She was clearly trying to steer the conversation back to chit chat. But she did sound proud when she stated, "The Bold and the Beautiful! I caught an episode the other day, you're very charming."
Finn looked up at her and smiled, "Thank you, Mrs Lopez, I've been having a blast so far."
Manuel wasn't impressed at all that Finn was an actor. "Acting isn't a very secure job. What's your back-up plan?"
A what now? Finn shrugged, "I kind of fell into Plan A, I haven't thought too much further ahead than that."
Manuel was growing more unimpressed.
"Not everyone's like you, Dad," Santana stated, "some people like to live in the moment."
"How's waiting tables working out for you?" Manuel didn't mince his words.
Santana returned stink eye so angry that Finn felt uncomfortable looking at her.
Maribel visibly winced, "Stop it, both of you!"
"So, you're a doctor," Finn was overly chipper, to the point of sounding fake, "that… sounds good."
Manuel shot him another unimpressed look, "I do important work, that helps other people live productive lives," He was clearly implying that he had contempt for something as superficial as acting, "and I will always be able to provide for my family."
Finn retracted from his words, and decided he wouldn't speak unless spoken to. Which didn't last long, because Manuel followed up with, "So Finn, do you intend to have a family?"
Finn choked on his mouthful of pork. Santana spat her gulp of soda back into the glass, she had such a strong reaction to his question.
"Oh, umm, I'm ahh," Finn didn't really want to talk about this now. He settled for "I don't know."
Manuel just shook his head.
"Officer Lopez, stop interrogating the suspect!" Santana sniped, between dabbing her mouth with her serviette.
Finn did want all of those things, one day. He was in no rush. But more than that, down the track when the time was right, he wanted to have this talk with Santana, privately. Before discussing his thoughts with anyone else. Santana wouldn't acknowledge he was her boyfriend for the first month, she practically fled when he tried to tell her he loved her. That conversation was a long way off. It was a rude question. Her dad seemed to think if a relationship wasn't working towards a wife, kids and a picket fence you were wasting your time.
"So how long has," Manuel gestured to Santana and him with his hand, "this been going on?"
February? March was the official answer. 2 months? A bit longer?
Santana saved him from having to answer, "Finn was one of the many boys I fucked in high school."
Abuelita warned her now, "Santana!"
"You will not speak such in my house," There was a mild threat to Mr Lopez's voice, but he wasn't out of control.
She just shrugged and took a big mouthful of rice and beans, "Don't ask if you don't want the honest answer."
Finn looked at his plate, and waited for whatever shit storm was about to erupt. Why do you have to make it worse?
"And what are you up to in Los Angeles?" Manuel directed his question to his daughter, "other than fetching other people's food."
Santana forced herself to say, "I've booked a couple of small gigs."
Manuel clearly wanted answers, "And every audition you go for, how many other women are you up against?"
Santana was nonchalant, "Varies, maybe 500 to 1000 most of the time."
"Those are ridiculous odds, it's not too late to go back to college, Santana."
"College isn't for me," Santana dismissed that notion out of hand, "drama school starts in a few months."
Manuel shook his head, "I had to work two jobs to pay for night school, and work even harder when we came to this country."
Santana rolled her eyes, and huffed, "What's your point?"
"You just threw away a free ride!" Manuel pointed out, "The University of Louisville were prepared to pay for four years of your college."
"I didn't want to study sociology," Santana countered.
He didn't miss a beat, "Then change your major."
"It's my life," Santana warned testily.
"If I had had that opportunity…." Manuel shook his head again to publicly demonstrate his disapproval, "and you just threw it away!"
Santana was quick to respond, "Now my spot will go to someone who actually wants to be in college."
"While you wait tables… for how much?"
"It's temporary… until I make it."
"And if nothing pans out?"
"It's my life!"
Manuel didn't raise his voice, he simply replied calmly, "And you're wasting it."
Santana took a deliberate swallow of soda. Finn knew her well enough now to know she was counting to ten in her head to control her anger. Her sarcasm reared its head, "Glad we cleared that up!"
Finn was starting to suspect she'd spiked her Coke with something harder.
"So, Finn," Abuela asked, "What do your parents' do?"
"My Mom works at the hospital, she's an orderly," Finn felt uncomfortable, like that wasn't good enough. "And my step father… is Burt Hummel, he used to run a tire shop, now he's a congressman."
"Oh, that's right!" Maribel said.
Alma's face pulled tight, "Yes, I remember that campaign," clearly meaning the campaign ads that outed Santana.
Then Finn wished he hadn't opened his mouth, again.
"Your parents' got divorced?" Manuel asked, clearly unimpressed.
"No, not… um, my father died, after serving his country."
Manuel finally seemed impressed with something. "He was in the army?"
"Yes, Sir."
"We thank him for his sacrifice."
He didn't die a hero. He was dishonorably discharged and ODed in motel room.
Manuel clearly wanted the measure of Finn, "So Finn, why acting?"
"I don't know, I like performing, I like that it's creative, and not…" Then he stopped, knowing he shouldn't answer too honestly.
"It's not what?" Manuel pressured him sharply.
"Nothing," Finn tried to cover, that he was about to say he didn't want a boring, conventional job. He'd clearly forgotten where he was. "I like acting a lot so far."
"Isn't acting essentially getting paid to lie," Manuel reduced his entire career to nothing in a single sentence.
Finn wasn't sure if he'd garner more respect if he pushed back or not. Fuck it! "That's one way to look at it, I suppose," Before Finn added, "acting can help inspire other people to change their lives, or to understand themselves better."
Manuel stilled, clearly irritated, "By regurgitating someone else's words, being told what to do informed by the director's vision, wearing clothes you didn't choose."
Finn felt like crap about everything. No wonder Santana has an acid tongue so no one dares attack her. She's had to, as a defense mechanism to survive this place.
Manuel was still pointing out, "But somehow you're the cause of the inspiration?" He scoffed.
"Manny!" Maribel was horrified, "Finn is our guest!"
"Like you're one to talk!" Santana retorted, clearly going into protection mode against her father, "All we do in this house is pretend."
Manuel sat up, wiping his mouth with his serviette, "I don't know what you're talking about."
Santana challenged him, "Why don't you just say what you really want to say!"
Finn could feel his tummy twisting in nervous anticipation as he saw Santana winding up for one of her famous verbal smack downs.
"Let's see, in the world according to you," Santana dramatized her words by counting on her fingers, "'Santana had sex with too many different boys,'" Santana made a mockery of her father's voice and very particular way of speaking, "'and then she had sex with girls,'" Santana pointed right at him aggressively, "and the real kicker is, 'that she's not really my daughter!'"
Finn nervously glanced at Manuel, and he was stunned, his mouth was open, he didn't look ready to blow his top so much as he was in utter disbelief.
And now the entire room was completely silent. That which no one dares speak, had finally been said.
Santana stood up, throwing her serviette down on the table, "'I'm a quarter Black," She mocked him, "and I have 'bad seed' DNA from a…. drumroll please…. a saxophone player! They're just the worst!'"
"Santana!" Mirabel snapped, lowering her voice and speaking in Spanish. Finn understood enough, she'd said 'don't speak such', 'what's Finn going to think of us.'
"Oh, did I break the rules?" Santana owned it right in Manuel's face, still sarcastic as hell, getting up, unapologetic as ever, "That which we NEVER talk about?"
Manuel was finally stunned silent. She got up from the table, and went upstairs. Now Finn knew why she didn't unpack her stuff. She grabbed her gym bag and came down again.
"What is she talking about?" Elena quietly asked Carlito.
Alma Castillo turned to her daughter, again speaking Spanish, she said something like, 'this is our business' she should not air their dirty laundry or whatever in front of company. And Maribel just looked like she wished she was someplace else.
"Thanks for dinner, Mom," Santana sounded chipper, ignoring her father's outburst, "I don't much feel like dessert."
Santana put on an overly cheerful, fake sounding retail voice, "So nice to see you all!"
And with that she left.
"I'm gonna go," Finn stated, without looking at anyone. He didn't thank them for their hospitality, because he hadn't been made welcome.
He clamored after her, grabbing his duffle bag and coat. It was cold out and now he was wondering how to get them to the Hudson-Hummel house ASAP. Santana was pacing. The anger was wafting off her, radiating out from the focal point, the source of all the pain and dysfunction, so raw for him to witness.
"Lopez family fuckin' dinner," She seared in her sarcasm, "there's nothing quite like it!"
Finn just said quietly, "I'm really sorry," before adding, "I should have listened when you said you didn't want to come here."
Santana's expression softened slightly, like she released a breath she was holding. And Finn very gently put his arms around her.
"We can go to my folks' house." He tried to lighten the mood, "I promise no one there is going to mention your boob job,"
She smiled sadly, before she cracked a full cheek raise.
I live for that dimple.
Finn insisted on driving.
"How much have you had?"
"Whatever do you mean?" Santana launched into her faux innocent ingenue, with exaggerated batting of eyelashes.
"Come on, there was nothing in that pantry you needed."
"Just my secret stash of Bacardi."
Finn shook his head.
She objected, "You trying dealing with them sober."
))))))))))))))))))
It was late, so Finn used his key, and they took off their shoes, and quietly went up the stairs. The whole house was quiet. They used the bathroom. He cracked open the door to his old room, and put his bag down and then he sat on the bed and felt something move.
Finn yelled entirely too loud, "What the fuck!"
A girl yelped, and grabbed for the blanket.
And then the bedside light was on and a blonde guy was shoving him, "What the hell…"
"Sam?" Finn was too astonished to say more than that.
"Finn!" Shrieked Brittany.
"Brittany!" It was Santana staring, annoyed, crossed arms in the doorway. The blonde woman appeared naked under the sheet.
"Santana!" Sam was jumpy.
Finn couldn't help but comment, "This is giving me Rocky Horror flashbacks."
"Brittany!" Brittany then repeated what Santana had said, for no real reason.
Sam calmed first, "You scared the shit out of me, man!"
Finn realized his mistake, "Dude, I totally forgot you've got my room since I went to L.A."
And then there was a super awkward silence. Where everyone was taking in everyone else.
"Why are you sneaking in like a burglar?" Sam questioned.
Since Sam's current girlfriend was his current girlfriend's ex, girlfriends was just a topic they tended to avoid when talking on the phone.
And as if it couldn't get any worse. The commotion obviously woke up Kurt, because Finn could hear footsteps, and then the door was wide open, and then the bedroom light was on.
"Sam, is everything al…" It was Rachel's voice.
"Rachel?" Finn, wished his voice hadn't suddenly hit such a high register with the shock of seeing his ex right now.
Santana took one look at Rachel and laid down the law, "Oh, hells no! I ain't stayin' here!" And Santana turned to leave… and ran into Kurt, who was opening the door.
"Santana!" Kurt had been half asleep was now jolted awake, "What are you…" Then he realized Rachel and Santana were staring at each other, "Oh."
Then Kurt saw Britt and Sam, the latter who only had on short boxer shorts… and then he appeared to get distracted.
And just when it didn't seem possible for the situation to become any more uncomfortable, it did.
"What are you…" Burt was suddenly in the room too. Wearing short boxer shorts and a white singlet.
Burt took one look at Sam in his boxers and Brittany seemingly naked, under the sheet she was holding up to her chin, exclaiming, "Sam! We talked about this! No girls in your room!"
Then Burt noticed him, "Finn!?" Before clapping him on the back, "Good to see ya, buddy."
"It's good to be back."
Finn turned to Rachel, "What are you doing here?"
Rachel was still put off by the whole picture and so took a while to respond, "My Dads are away and our house is undergoing renovations… so I asked Kurt if I could stay here."
Kurt chimed in with, "And I said yes, because I thought you two were staying at San… Lima Heights Adjacent."
Then Finn looked back at Santana, who was rolling her eyes at the present state of affairs. She had an expression he could only describe as 'of course this is happening'.
"We were, but, our plans changed unexpectedly."
And then somehow, Mom was in the room too. At least she had a dressing gown on.
"Finn!" Mom shuddered awake, "We weren't expecting you until tomorrow."
"Yeah, um, we can't stay at Santana's place, we'll take the couch in the lounge room and we can work something out tomorrow."
"Not the same couch," Burt warned, pointing between Santana and Finn.
"Oh, come on, we practically live together!" Finn protested.
Burt disagreed strongly, "Not under my roof, unless you're married." He pointed between the two of them, "Separate beds."
Mom helpfully suggested, "Santana can bunk with Kurt."
"Um, Rachel's already sleeping on the fold out in my room," Kurt informed his dad.
Burt was not happy, "Brittany, you gotta go, now."
Brittany stood, wrapped only in a sheet. And then just how bad it was that so many guys were in the room, became obvious.
"Everyone out," Burt instructed, "Let her get changed, then I'm driving her home."
"I'll stay at Britt's house," Santana offered.
Sam and Finn practically in unison said, "No!"
"Excuse you!" Santana's hands were on her hips looking pointedly at him.
"I want us to stay together," Finn appealed to her. She was clearly annoyed that he didn't trust her.
Santana suggested, "Then come to Britt's house."
He didn't really want to do that. Brittany's parents were weird, like really weird in a hippy sort of way when their behavior wasn't out-an-out bizarre. And he didn't really want to have to watch Santana and Brittany reunited. "Um, I barely know them, that's super awkward."
"Fine!" She huffed.
"We'll work something out," Finn looked at his mom, he knew she'd be more reasonable than Burt on this issue.
"Go to bed," Burt said, surveying the scene before him, "all of you!" And with that he sauntered off down the hall to his bedroom to pull on jacket and find his keys.
))))))))))))))
"How's my big boy!" Mom pulled him into a huge bear hug and kissed and kissed him multiple times on both cheeks, like he was a little kid. Finn kind of didn't mind it though. This was the longest he'd ever been away from his mom.
Mom found the spare mattress in the garage, and helped Finn unwrap it from the plastic sheeting and push it into the sitting room downstairs. They were by the kitchen and out in the open, but it was better than nothing. She found couch cushions for pillows and a blanket and two couch throw rugs.
"It'll do," Finn appreciated her effort.
"We'll come up with something better tomorrow," Mom said.
Finn didn't want to appear ungrateful. Santana had made herself scarce, like she didn't want to remind Carole she was there, or to avoid further uneasy conversation. But Mom broke the ice well.
"We're all looking forward to having a formal dinner tomorrow night, to get to know you properly."
Santana exaggerated smile looked fake. And the way her eyes became large, and you could see the white all the way around made her look angry and scary. Finn knew this was one of her defense mechanisms. She doesn't want to have the dinner.
It sounded disingenious out of her mouth, "Looking forward to it."
Mom nodded, "Sleep well." And left.
Finn encouraged Santana to curl up next to him, "It won't be like your house."
"I think I missed Britt's parents more than mine," Santana admitted once she was positioned as his little spoon.
Finn found that admission, revealing. "Seriously?"
"Yeah, they're always happy to see me."
"I get that," Finn kissed her ear, "they're too vague to judge anyone."
"Exactly!" Santana smiled, and turned her head to smooch him back.
That was the real reason. Santana's dad was a big ball of societal judgement, who wasn't interested in any perspective that wasn't his own. He was 'right', and everyone else needed to be broken and re-set until they fit into his mold.
To be gay and artsy and grow up in that house must have been… sucky. To not be his biological child on top of that, and for him to know it… that must have been hell. You don't have the kind of trust issues Santana seemed to have if everything had been hunky dory.
He warned her, "No funny business tonight."
"Oh, definitely," She agreed readily, "I'm half expecting Berry to be standing over you in the night, watching you sleep."
"She's not a stalker!"
"That remains to be un-seen."
"Go to sleep," He clutched her waist to tickle her.
"You go to sleep," She elbowed him in the gut behind her.
He squeezed her tighter. Santana had been silent on the ride over here, clearly not wanting to discuss the painful evening with her folks.
"Don't listen to him," Finn suddenly whispered.
"Huh?"
"You aren't like him, so what's right for him, isn't gonna be right for you."
She squeezed the arm that was around her.
"It's your life," He repeated what she'd been saying all night, to let her know he had her back, "you should do what you want."
He could actually feel her body relax more after he said that. He felt ashamed he hadn't done more at the time. He'd just been utterly unprepared for that evening. And sitting there, when Santana and her dad had really started going at it, got him think on everything, he'd made a disturbing realization of his own, that had paralyzed him.
A/N: There is more going on with Santana's Broadway rejection- it's not about her being gay and out per se.