A/N: In this version the plotline of 'Shooting Star' didn't happen.
[Unique voiceover] I wake up early on school days. I love to have a little extra time to be my Unique and fabulous self!
Unique threw off her duvet, a custom made, Art America, Beyoncé duvet cover. She was wearing her black satin, Neiman Marcus nightdress with 'Dangerously sexy' embroidered on the front. She went over to her white, wooden vanity, with gold trimming, and pulled her newest 'blonde Beyoncé-style wig off her mannequin head, and turned on her light pink CD player. A strong late 70s disco beat started.
She began to sing along to Donna Summer's 'Hot Stuff.' Unique did her make up, nails, hair, changed her outfit. Unique loved online shopping and accessorizing to get her outfits as close to Ms Knowles as possible. Today she was rockin' a replica emerald green Walter Mendez dress, circa Beyoncé at Jay-Z's Tidal Benefit Concert. She even had the furry, plum colored shawl. She tried on different jewelry, all while she sang. She loved 'me time'.
Eventually she'd worked her way through Beyoncé, and Aalyiah and Patti LaBelle, singing all the arias as if it were her big solo career. She could see it now, up in lights, 'Unique' on tour, in a diamond studded gown, singing in front of a packed stadium… and adoring fans threw roses. And she thanked the screaming crowd for their support and blew kisses, as she picked up a bunch of roses and went to leave…
And then her cell phone alarm sounded. The sad sound, that meant 'me time' was over. She had to put on the obligatory 'boy clothes' to make her parents happy, but she was taking her real clothes, wig, make-up and bust 'enhancements', so she could get changed before Glee rehearsal.
When Unique had to pretend to be Wade, it was like all the color drained out of the world, and she became a mouse. As she transformed into the Wade Mouse, she needed to give herself her daily pep talk, I just have to make it until 4 pm. She came down stairs in her boring 'Wade' clothes and sat at the circular meals table in the middle of her kitchen. Mom was munching on toast, while glancing at the news on the TV and standing at the kitchen desperately packing the dishwasher. Mom, the professional, the multitasker, so elegant and always put together.
Dad was yelling at the screen, while eating his eggs, "I don't trust the bloody lot of them!"
The TV news caster spoke 'UK Prime Minister, David Cameron, will tell Barack Obama in the White House today that he believes Vladimir Putin could be prepared to adopt a more flexible strategy around Syria.'
Unique was having apple and cinnamon pop tarts.
"Wade," Her Mom took her eyes from the news, "I won't be home until after seven tonight, when you get in from school, order yourself take out."
"Okay, Mom."
She added, "I've left $20 on the fridge next to the take-out menus."
Unique was already off thinking about the outfit and show she would perform in the lounge room. Whitney at the '89 Grammys? She had a white dress with fake jewels on it, and a wig that could be styled to hold its curly form. She could see it now 'One Moment in Time' in front of a live audience, being televised. It was much better when they were out, she had reign of the whole house. Her room was so cramped. "Where's Dad going to be?"
He chimed in, "I have a doctor's appointment after work."
"Oh, is everything okay?" She didn't know that, and was a little alarmed.
Dad paused for a brief moment, "Everything's fine, son."
Son. Every time I ask him to refer to me as 'she' or his daughter, it's like he just doesn't hear it. Unique as Wade nodded, hiding her inner dismay. It was a little thing, and maybe it shouldn't wound her at this point, but it did. Just those little cuts.
"Honey, don't forget your meds," Her Mom reminded her.
[Unique voiceover] I have anxiety. The doctor says it will help me to relax, and hold onto the happy hormones my body produces. But the cause of my anxiety is that I know the whole jock population of McKinley High want to slam me up against the lockers or worse, and most of the rest of them think I'm a freak and wouldn't do anything to help me if the jocks did. With a few shining lights, few and far between, I don't have a lot of friends I can rely on there. Thank the karmic diva magic for Miss Marley Rose.
)))))))))
She stood out the front waiting for the big yellow school bus. The first five stops were always the hardest. She got on, and sat in an empty seat by the window nearest the driver, and tried to be invisible. There were three boys that got on at stop number 2 who terrified her. They all played hockey, and were always asking her what she had between her legs, and calling her 'She-male Precious'. So, she would just try to look out the window, and not look scared, even if she was sick to her stomach. But by then she only had to make it three stops. On one of the days, she was being her Unique and fabulous self, the red head with the freckles had grabbed her wig right off her head and told her if she wanted it back, she would need to show them what she had. Unique had responded sassily, that perhaps they were the ones who needed help if they were so obsessed with her genitals. But the blonde shit with the acne had gotten the last laugh, he'd thrown her wig out the window onto the street while they were moving.
But by stop 5 Brittany got on, and then it was all better. Brittany wasn't the best company, but she was a tall, thin, blonde cheerleader, so if she was happy to sit with Unique then others deigned to tolerate her. Brittany hadn't been able to pass a driver's test yet, she'd failed four times, and everyone had sort of given up on the idea of her ever passing. So, she took the bus every day now, which was new for her, because Santana used to drive her around last year. She was dating Sam now, but he didn't have his own car. And he caught a different bus now since he lived with the Hudson-Hummels. Marley and Jake both lived in Lima Heights, and so caught a different bus.
"Today's Glee is going to be awesome!" Brittany was excitedly clapping her hands together.
"Because last year's seniors are helping us prep?" Unique as Wade asked.
"Santana, Finn, and Kurt and Rachel…" Brittany started counting, "I'm not sure who else?"
Kurt was always a treat. "I for one, hope Ms Mercedes Jones is coming!"
Brittany looked at her, confused.
"I'm Unique."
"Oh, okay."
Ryder had a car, a pretty nice one, a hardtop Jeep Wrangler Renegade. It was rugged with a dark green body and tan roof… Unique imagined sitting in the front seat, wind in her hair while Ryder drove them to the mall. They were shopping for outfits to go to prom together in. Unique would be wearing a figure-hugging, gold Ellie Saab dress with a plunging neckline, to pay homage to the Goddess herself, Beyonce, at the 2007 Golden Globes. Unique always had real cleavage in her dreams. Ryder would be in charcoal grey, with a black bow tie. Hair, freshly mussed. Boyish smile melting her heart.
She'd only been it in his sweet ride twice. Once when Ryder dropped her, Sugar and Tina at the mall to get fabric to make the Sectionals costumes, and once when Ryder had offered to give Marley a lift home, and she'd said okay, but could he drop her too. Marley was awesome like that. Ryder had clearly wanted alone time with Marley, this was early on, before she was officially seeing Jake.
First period was Home Ec. It was fun, in that Unique liked cooking. Suga was in this class, but she usually paired up with this brunette Cheerio who always stink eyed Unique. There was an odd number of kids, so Unique would cook alone, but at least that meant she got to keep all the food. They made Quiche Lorraine today, which at least was something she wanted to eat.
Second period English was not usually so good. They were studying Romeo and Juliet, which Unique really liked. Their group assignment for a quarter of their grade was to act out a scene from the play, but putting their own spin on it. Unique wanted so badly to be Juliet, but Marley was the choice, of course. Unique wouldn't have minded being Lady Capulet, at least she would have worn an elegant outfit. But, Sugar had insisted, and since her whole identity seemed to center around 'I'm richer than you and therefore better', she was kind of a good fit for Juliet's mother. But, that meant, of course, she was stuck playing the dowdy nurse, complete with black maid outfit and white apron. They were doing the act I scene where Lady Capulet and her nurse are trying to convince Juliet to marry Paris. Except Marley wasn't at school today. So Unique was rehearsing and stealing glances at Ryder, but trying not to watch him too obviously. While Sugar was online shopping on her iPhone and talking about some girl who'd slighted her. More like she was nattering away, and Unique was ignoring her.
Ryder was wearing his baggy Lee Jeans, and just a polo shirt, it looked plain but it was from The Gap. His hair only having been minimally tussled. He was paired up with another football guy, Anthony, and they were acting out the scene where Romeo kills Tybalt, as if they were part of rival mafia families circa The Godfather. Ryder was playing Romeo, so she couldn't help but imagine him with her playing out the balcony scene…
"Wade!"
Unique came out of her delightful fantasy.
It was Mr Overman looking rather unimpressed standing before her, "And what is your staging of your chosen scene?"
"Um, Marley and I planned to set it in the 1950s." Unique as the Wade Mouse spoke quietly.
Mr Overman looked like Eric's Dad in That 70's Show, and he acted like Javert from Les Misérables. He often called on her in class in front of everyone, which she hated.
"What scene?"
"The one where Juliet's mother and her nurse are trying to convince her to marry."
"And I suppose you'll be playing Juliet?" Mr Overman said, full of distain, encouraging the sniggers from her classmates.
"No, Marley is," She replied quietly, but I belong playing Juliet just as much as Marley!
Mr Overman was the kind of teacher who hated the 'nice try ribbon'. High school was a food chain and you had to learn your place on the chain. And according to him, Unique's place was meat.
"And what staging have you chosen?" He interrogated her.
Unique loved this play, she had studied it a lot in her own time, she knew large chunks of it by heart.
Speak! She commanded herself.
"Th, th, the 50's conservativism," She stuttered, he always made her nervous, "around McCarthy, and m, mm, making people take loyalty oaths…" You can do it! "Th, th, there was a push for women to return home and be devoted wives and mothers…" Unique tried to articulate her well-thought-out plan, "with the pressure for women to marry at that time, and be housewives…mirrored that message... like the Stepford Wives… s, s, since it's a scene about Juliet being talked into marrying, despite her young age by her mother and her… surrogate mother, it seems like a good fit."
Mr Overman looked horrified, before commenting bitingly, "So you've made Shakespeare frivolous."
He made sure everyone else knew he thought her idea was crap too, "I can't wait to see it," He said, completely sarcastic, "You've certainly put your own unique spin on it."
The Wade Mouse wished she was invisible then. She wished Marely was here. Half the class were laughing. She glanced over and was gladdened to see that Ryder wasn't one of them.
))))))
Usually, she'd hang with Marley and Jake at recess and lunch. But Marley still wasn't here. And Jake was nowhere to be found. So, she hid at recess. People can't take your stuff or hurt you, if they can't find you. Unlike other undesirables, not even the bathrooms were safe for her though. Too many raised eyebrows and questions about if she were using the appropriate toilets. So, her preferred hiding spot was the storeroom connected to the art rooms.
Third period was gym. Gym was her least favorite class. And to make matters worse, Coach Sue was subbing for their regular gym teacher, and she didn't look happy about it. She immediately separated out all the Cheerios from the rest, so they could get in an impromptu practice, so that meant Kitty wasn't there to help her, not that Kitty did all that much. Which only left six girls. Coach Sue grouped Unique with the boys, which she was unfortunately expecting. She got them to warm up by playing dodgeball, which is the worst. It really hurts when basketball jocks hurl those balls as hard as they can at your face.
Unique went out first, Josh Colman, Junior all around dickhead, flung a ball at her head, luckily, she was only hit on the ass. Just because 'Wade' has to take this shit didn't mean Unique couldn't stroll by the parking lot later and slash his tires. Josh Coleman, you just made my 'Fuck you' list.
"Oh, come on Frank-N-Furter," Sue roared at her through a megaphone, "you didn't even try!"
And then Coach Sue made them play touch football. Sue hated non-contact so she made the rules that it was okay to tackle each other. Sue made Josh Coleman the captain of one team and Fletcher Mantini the captain of the other and let them take turns picking their own team. Unique hated this way, it was bad enough having the gym teacher shame you, but two of your class mates saying they didn't want you repeatedly was hurtful as she waited to be picked last. Fortunately, there was an odd number, and so she, as predicted, last picked, volunteered to start on the bench. She watched the men hitting each other, being thrown down into the dirt, being winded. Every harsh contact made her stomach twist a little tighter. I don't want to. The Wade Mouse preyed they would all get caught up in their game of murder ball and forget her. But it wasn't to be. Ten minutes in, Coach Sue yelled at her.
"Lady Boy," Sue addressed her, "get in there," pointing to the scrimmage.
Jim Sidwell, made fun of her, "You know, if you're not too worried about breaking a nail." He was a sleazy wiseass from the baseball team with beady dark eyes and more freckles than his face knew what to do with.
Most of the guys sniggered.
You just made my 'Fuck you' list too! Oh, Unique just might need to start a rumor that you have syphilis!
Her team huddled up and came up with a plan of defense. The gist was that she was supposed to block Andy Skapetis from getting past her. He was on the track team, broad shouldered and way too fast for her, and so she took a deep breath and waited for her impending failure. When the play started, he dodged around her easily, they threw Andy the ball and he ran it for a touchdown. They went back in the huddle. Her 'team' was starting with the ball this time, so she just needed to go long and make it look like she was going to get the ball. Create a diversion.
Ready… break.
But when she lined up, she knew something was up. Josh Coleman, the rugby player, was opposite her, with a knowing smile on her face. Why would they waste a good player to guard me? She didn't have to wonder long, because the ball was punted and Josh tackled her, shoving her face down in the grass, and Jim, and another jock she didn't even know were all over her.
No! Get off me!
And then she felt a hand tugging down her shorts.
Oh no!
Not just the shorts, her underwear too, down to her ankles. And now both teams were staring and pointing at her business. Ryder, who was on her team, saw her bottom half, exposed, and she wanted to die. She covered herself with her hand as best she could and yanked her shorts and underwear back up.
"Nice drawers, Silence of the Lambs!" Said Jim.
And their team burst out laughing and pointing. They hadn't even tried to play the ball. Her team had run the ball for a touchdown but no one cared.
"Gee, golly Ed Wood," Sue spoke through the megaphone, so even the Cheerios half a field away could hear too, her tone was amused, "that's just bad luck!"
Unique as the Wade Mouse fought to speak through her tears, "I need to go to the nurse."
"No can do, Lady Boy," Sue yelled, "you're not injured."
"I am," She couldn't catch her breath and her chest was going to explode, she'd met her fill of humiliation and it wasn't even lunch yet. "I have a migraine."
It was her number one excuse. No one can see a migraine, and she'd had the symptoms to describe to the nurse down for some years now.
"You're pathetic," Coach Sue yelled at her, but she let her go in the end.
The Wade Mouse, headed for the locker room. She always wore lacey panties, because it was underneath, what harm did it do? She got to feel comfortable and like her Unique and fabulous self, just below the 'Wade' surface. And now… everyone knew. They would be laughing at her, and all the taunts and looks would get even worse… her eyes teared up just thinking about it.
She'd always found a way to leave gym early, because she didn't want to shower in front of anyone and locker rooms didn't allow for privacy. It wasn't perfect, but she had a face washer she would wet with hot soapy water, and then she'd lock herself in a toilet stall and wipe the sweat from her face, hands, pits and if she needed it, her groin. Then she'd get changed and hit the deodorant hard. It wasn't a good system, but she didn't want to risk anyone seeing her in any state of undress. All that carefulness amounted to nothing now. Tales of her lacey panties and her bits would tear through McKinley like wild fire. And it was only Monday. At least Kurt was coming, and maybe Mercedes, otherwise she would have gone home. She took two aspirin and pretended to sleep in the sick bay. She had her phone with her on silent, and she started texting Ryder as Katie during lunch.
Katie: How's your day?
Ryder: Fine. Glad I have Glee Club later.
She almost wrote 'me too', then stopped herself.
Katie: You won't believe what happened at my school today…
Ryder: What?
Her hands were shaking as she typed, from the silent tears she was crying.
Katie: These jocks held this fat kid down in the cafeteria and poured chocolate topping into his mouth.
Ryder: Realy?
She found all his dyslexic spelling mistakes endearing at this point.
Katie: Really! He was crying, it looked like waterboarding.
Ryder: That's awful.
She was lying, but wanted to see what he'd say about what had happened to her.
She saw the dots winking as he typed another text.
Ryder: Yeh, bulying is so ful on. This guy in my gym clas had his pants pulled down so the jocks could laugh at him.
'Him'. Even after everything, in private, Ryder still called her 'him'.
Katie: Why him?
Ryder: You know how I telld you there's a guy in Glee Club, who insists he's a girrl…
Unique took a deep breath.
Katie: Yeah.
Ryder: Wel, it was him, and that's why.
The focus of Ryder's comment was on her for being trans, rather then the bullies for being transphobic. The why, Unique corrected him for her own benefit, is because they all hate me for being different.
Katie: What happened?
Ryder: Evryone lauhged at him, because he has a smll dick and was wearing red lacey girrl undies. Its all over the scool.
And then she couldn't take anymore.
Ryder: I feell srry for him.
Her crush was of course oblivious, so he wrote another message.
Ryder: I know you are hesitant, but, I realy want to meet face to face. I know that picture you sent isnt you, and maybe your woried I won't like the reel you, but I do.
But she couldn't write anything back.
Ryder: I get grosss zits on my back, and I can bearly read, so Im not the catch you thnk I am etiher.
It's not the same.
She watched the three little dots moving as he wrote another message.
Ryder: I prmise not to make you feell bad, I think if we could just, meeet up..."
It had been like this for three weeks now. He was insisting and getting angrier and angrier at her evasiveness. But she knew, no matter what he said now, he wasn't going to like her once he knew. Not yet, she needed more time, for him to see her for who she truly is. And she was so in love with him, she couldn't stop being Katie either. The thought of him not talking to her… she couldn't go there. They talked about everything. Their dreams, what they liked and hated, and how they wanted their lives to turn out, and what's important to them. Ryder was perfect. He was perfect for her. She just needed more time.
))))))))))))))))))))) Santana POV ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Santana stood for a moment watching Brittany, standing still at her locker, trying to remember something she needed. She looked beautiful, and Santana couldn't help but feel her heart flutter a little.
"Hey Britt Britt," Santana came up behind her in the hallway.
Lipsy Beiber nowhere to be seen for once.
"Santana," Britt looked really happy, instantly pulling her into a warm hug.
"Sorry, we didn't get to talk last night," She didn't want to even mention that mess. She knew Britt and Sam were doing the nasty, she just never wanted it to be that in her face. Santana had woken up and gotten the hell out of that house so fast this morning, she didn't want to see Berry, or Finn's parents. Or Sam.
"Yeah, that was…."
"Weird," Santana supplied.
"Awkward."
"You can say that again," She smiled.
"Awkward."
Oh, Britt.
"At least you're here now to help us."
"Yeah, I mean, I just wanted an excuse to say 'hi'," Santana admitted.
"I've narrowed it down, that Lord Tubbington is either Kitty, Marley or Mercedes."
What the fuck!
"Ok-ay," Santana decided to ignore that comment and move along, "I've gotten another call back for A Chorus Line."
"That's awesome."
"Are you going to do both"
"Both what?"
"Chicago and A Chorus Line."
Her face fell at the mention of Chicago. "Ah, no, um, Chicago didn't work out."
"Oh, I'm sorry," Britt was empathetic, "You know… Chicago is windy and full of organized crime."
Santana laughed, bless her heart for trying to cheer me up.
"It's their loss," Britt said, "I bet your… sexiness would have upstaged whoever was playing Roxie"
It was too raw a nerve right now. The more she thought about it, the more her rejection just didn't make sense. No way they rejected her because some stupid Ohio ads from a year ago that said she's gay. It's Broadway FFS!
"And how goes the prep for Nationals?" Santana asked, "I can't wait for you to come to L.A."
Santana walked her out to the cafeteria. Brittany got a juice. Santana hated the school menu options.
"I think I'm supposed to have math this period?" Brittany said off-handedly.
Whatever. Santana really wanted her to graduate, she just didn't really think missing one class at this point was going to make any difference. They sat down.
"How's Finn?" Brittany asked genuinely.
It was kind. Santana didn't ask after Sam. She fucking hated thinking about Sam, and his stupid lips… and where he was putting his stupid lips…
"Still recovering from Lopez family dinner last night."
"That bad?" Britt was full of concern.
"Worse than that bad," Santana was dismayed to even recall it, "Manuel Lopez did a personal best effort with the alienation."
"He got probed?"
"What?! No… I mean he picked Finn apart, and then…" Santana didn't really want to rehash that horror show, "you know what he's like."
Brittany nodded, recalling, "He asked if I was 'all there'."
Santana winced, just remembering back to the first time Brittany came over for dinner when her father was home. "But, he's a prick, so…"
"We don't care what he thinks," Brittany finished off the saying they had concocted years before.
Santana smiled, "that's riiiight, we don't care what he thinks."
"What did he say to Finn?"
"He put down acting as a career, that it's not a stable 'real job'," She used her hand to make air quotes, "and if you do it, you must be a vain, air head," Santana re-worded the conversation from last night.
Brittany pointed out, "But you're doing acting."
"Exactly, so making Finn feel like crap was also a backhanded swipe at me."
Brittany was shocked, "He hit you!?"
What?! No! "Only with his judgement," Santana replied sassily.
Britt smirked.
Santana used her words plainly, "And to make it worse, mi abuela was there."
"Is she still not talking to you."
"That's just it, I bring a boy home, and suddenly she's all, 'how are you, Santana?' 'Oh Finn, aren't you a lovely young man,'" Santana couldn't hide her disdain as she mimicked abuela's voice, "She was practically salivating over him!"
"What did you say?"
"I told her to get fucked," Santana said, "Like her love for me is conditional on the genitals of the person I date."
She glanced at her phone. Eight messages and 12 missed calls from Mom. Unsurprising. She felt bad for making everything so hard for her mom. She didn't deserve that, Mami just wanted everyone to get along. But being out of there for all these months now, and experiencing a different way of being with Finn… when Santana felt it all going back to how it used to be, she just couldn't stand it.
And then she saw two missed calls from 'PRICK FACE'. The Good Doctor never calls me. Her father hadn't left a message. She didn't have the energy to deal with whatever lecture was coming.
Santana snapped herself out of her thoughts as Britt was still talking about Abuelita, "She's wrong not to talk to you because you like me."
"Agreed."
"How's your mom?"
"Still recovering from the bomb I dropped at dinner last night."
"Where did you get a bomb from?"
"Not an actual bomb," Before she joked, "though that may have been an improvement…" She knew she needed to tell her best friend, "I may or may not have said something to piss my dad off."
"What was it?"
Even now, she felt nervous. "You can't tell anyone one, okay?"
"Okay."
"Not even Sam."
"Not even Sam," She promised.
Santana felt a little guilty, "I should have told you this sooner, but I didn't want anyone to know."
Britt gave her full attention, "You can tell me anything."
"Yeah, I know. And, I think you will get it better than most." Since your dad, clearly isn't your dad, either. Except that neither of you seem to know it.
You can do this. "I'm not really his kid."
Brittany was still and expressionless. Then her brows knitted, "Did your parents take the wrong baby home from the hospital? I saw a movie about that."
She stifled a chuckle, "No, I was born as the result of my mom having an affair."
Britt took a moment to consider that. "Who did she have an affair with?"
"Her old boyfriend, a sax player in the band she used to sing in."
She made sense of it in the own special way, "So, you have two dads… like Rachel?"
What? No, I have a man who makes me feel like shit for existing, and a guy who walked away from my pregnant mother and doesn't give the slightest amount of a fuck about me.
"No, not like Berry."
Berry's Daddies praise her every time she farts!
"Oh." Brittany took it in slowly, "And you told your dad at dinner last night that he's not your dad?"
"No, Britt, he knew," Santana tried to explain it, "'The Good Doctor' has known since I was a little kid, he just doesn't acknowledge it openly."
"Oh," Was all Britt said, blinking a few times, "Why do you want him to say you aren't his kid?" Britt wondered out loud.
"Because…" Santana found herself struggling to explain it, "to anyone who observes us, my family… my dad appears reasonable."
"He does?"
Santana loved that Brittany didn't like him, and she usually found a way to like just about everyone.
"To the casual observer, he only wants what's best for me, and gets down on me for my… personal failings."
"What personal failings?"
Love you, Britt, she couldn't help but smile.
"That I'm superficial," Santana began to count on her fingers as she reeled them off, she had them memorized at this point, hearing The Good Doctor's voice in her head as she recalled them, "lacking direction, flighty, irrational, short sighted, promiscuous, and commitment-phobic."
Santana checked Brittany's face before proudly proclaiming, "Because rational, man of science that he is, Dr Manuel Lopez won't allow himself to attack me for something that is completely not my fault."
"Why isn't he mad at your mom, then?"
Excellent question Britt!
"He loves her. He hates me, this fucking reminder every time he looks at my face."
"But that's not…"
"Fair? Rational?" Santana supplied, "yeah, he knows that, so he re-packages his hatred of me, as all about my individual short-comings, nothing to do with the fact that he hates me for simply… existing."
Brittany got to the heart of it, "That's really mean."
Yes, it is. Santana felt the need to push the tight feeling in her chest down again. She hated talking about this. "Yeah."
Britt was still thinking on it.
Santana drew it back to her initial point, "That way, he can keep pretending everything is perfect with our family, and that I am just the 'disappointing child'."
"I know why Snixx is so good at mean insults," Brittany explained, "when your dad says mean stuff, you think up what you'd like to say to him."
Santana nodded sadly, letting a tear stream down her cheek.
"But you never say them to him, just kids at school who piss you off."
"Yeah, well, I finally let him have it," Santana said.
"It's like when Lucas gets mad at Nathan in One Tree Hill," Brittany educated her, "rather than just accept things the way they are, he stood up to him, he said 'I'm not less'."
Britt might have her own zany way of connecting the dots, but her point was right. Santana didn't watch that show, but she appreciated the effort.
"Thanks."
"Anger can be a good thing," Brittany counseled, "You don't deserve to be treated like you are less."
And Santana pulled her best friend into a hug, and squeezed her really tight, tears rolled down her cheeks.
Their moment was interrupted by Sam. "Santana?"
Santana dropped her gaze to the table, and subtly wiped her face.
"Heya, Macauley Lipskin, how are those Star Wars impressions coming?" Not even biting, clearly, she was off her game.
"Always a pleasure," Said Sam sarcastically.
"Yeah, it's great she's here to help us," Britts completely missed his tone.
Love you, Britt.
))))))))))))))))))) Finn POV ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
This morning had been… uncomfortable. Santana had gotten the hell out of Dodge so fast, he had no idea where she'd disappeared to, but she was determined to be away. She wasn't answering his texts, so he gave her space.
Rachel on the other hand, had 'accidently', but really on purpose, walked in on Finn and Santana that morning. They were just curled up on the mattress together, up to nothing. Rachel had made up some crazy story about how she was looking for a plastic basin that she required for her morning beauty ritual. Santana had made a Beeline for the bathroom and left the house without so much as a word to him. And he politely told Rachel to make other arrangements if she couldn't go back to her house tonight. She was hurt. But he was firm about it. She had other friends besides Kurt.
Finn had spent some quality time with Burt at his shop, he wanted to catch up properly with Mom, but she was at the hospital.
Burt wasn't very comfortable talking about relationship stuff, but he tried. "So, the whole, seeing Santana thing, how's that going… okay?"
Finn smiled, "You know, it is." He considered for a moment, "I'm really glad," He thought back on the last few months, it had been a lot of changes, "glad I gave us a shot, glad I moved to L.A." He added as an afterthought, "even though I miss you guys."
"That's good, I'm proud of you," Burt said, "and her, is she as happy as you are?"
"With Santana, it can be hard to tell," Finn admitted, "but I hope so."
"You're glad, I'm glad," Burt commented.
Burt liked to keep it simple, and Finn appreciated that quality.
"Have you two been… getting to know each other, like you know, her interests and childhood and stuff?"
"Yeah, you know, we are getting really close, actually I kind of wanted your opinion on something."
But then his phone rang and he got distracted.
'Santana's Mom' displayed on his iPhone.
He didn't really want to answer it, but she had been a gracious host, it was just everyone else… he didn't even want to think about last night ever again. But truth be told he couldn't stop thinking about it.
"Hello."
"Finn," She sounded relieved.
"Mrs Lopez."
"Please, call me Maribel."
"Okay."
He heard her take a deep breath, "I wanted to apologize for last night, that is not how we usually are… our family," Her embarrassment was evident.
Finn didn't know what to say.
Maribel kept apologizing, "I'm sorry you had to see that."
Apologize to Santana for making her endure that for so long.
"Can we meet up, coffee, I need to talk to you," She said.
WTF, Santana's Mom!
"I don't work on Wednesdays," She said, "meet me for a coffee, at The Lima Bean. Say ten?"
Super awkward! But what he said was, "Awesome," He sounded like he didn't mean it at all.
But that was enough for her. "Great, settled, I'll see you then."
))))))))))
"So… you and Santana…" Mr Schue still seemed to think their relationship couldn't be real, "that's still… happening?"
As if an explanation were somehow required.
"Yeah, can't believe it's been only like… just over two months."
"Well, if you're happy…" Mr Schue said, but he seemed disingenuous when he didn't finish the sentence.
"I am," And then Finn gushed about how far Santana got in her Chicago audition.
Mr Schue listened, but when Finn came to a rest point in his narrative, his teacher asked, "Have you seen or heard anything of Rachel?"
"Yeah, I saw her a few days ago, auditioning for the reboot of A Chorus Line, she made it to the second round."
"Good on her!" Mr Schue looked proud, "How's she finding NYADA."
Finn told him what he knew, and then moved on to Kurt. Kurt was and wasn't bummed about A Chorus Line, on one hand, he loved that musical, on the other, his dancing wasn't his strong suit.
"How about you?" Finn asked, hoping that somehow, he and Miss Pillsbury were finding a way to work it out.
"Emma's moved back in, we've worked it out," Mr Schue seemed really relieved, and he had a conspiratorial wink, that left Finn wondering. "I know now, it was too much, the big, white, church wedding."
Finn couldn't help but ask, "Did she say anything else about why?"
"Oh, just the stuff we already talked about, we needed to get back on the same page."
How could he sit here and pretend he didn't know why she'd freaked out? He wasn't down in the dumps now, like he had been then, he needed to apologize, and try to make it right.
Finn just couldn't lie anymore, "I kissed her."
Mr Schue was completely blank, "Kissed who?"
"Emma… Miss Pillsbury…" Finn stammered, "but I didn't mean to…"
Mr Schue still didn't seem to be able to make sense of Finn's words.
Finn was hyperventilating, "It was no reflection of Emma, I was in a really bad place, and I just did it, without thinking."
Mr Schue was still lost, "When did this happen?"
And then Finn hesitated, there was no good way to say this, "A week before your wedding."
Mr Schue's face went from disbelief, to shock, to anger, to betrayal, but he remained silent.
Which only freaked Finn out more, "She'd been helping me, and I was having a hard time… and then she was freaking out about wedding stuff, and I was… I don't know, I wasn't thinking…"
Mr Schue looked at him with disgust and maybe revulsion, and then he shook his head, and stood up. Like he was so angry, he couldn't speak or all his feelings would topple out right now.
Don't go. It meant nothing, I don't think of her like that. I was missing Rachel…
But the only words that actually came out were, "I'm so sorry."
Mr Schue turned back, and just looked at him, a cold look, like Finn was dead to him, and shook his head again, and just left.
In one sense, Finn was glad that the guilt he'd been carrying around about continuing to lie about it was less, but the reality, that he'd made a move on Emma a week before her wedding, to… what was Mr Schue to him? His pseudo-Dad, and cool worldly buddy all rolled into one? And Finn had stomped all over that… that came to the fore.
I wish that had gone better.
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Unique POV )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
It was finally 4 pm. Unique was in the ladies' room putting the touches on her stunning outfit. She looked like Oprah meets Early 90s Whitney. And her long-haired, wavy black wig was working wonders today. Her enhancements were giving her some rockin' cleavage, and courtesy of her new slimming undergarments she could add supports into, she looked curvier at the hips too. She was one hot package if she did say so herself. Just because Wade was having a shit day, didn't mean Unique had to be!
She pulled out her wheel of tablets, and popped the pill into her mouth.
"Are those birth control pills?" Marley was wide eyed.
"Yep," Unique smiled, "trans kids everywhere are doing it, my Bs are going to become Ds!"
"Is that safe?" Her friend was taken aback.
Marley was the only person in the whole school who didn't know about the debacle that had happened to Wade during gym. Her friend was touching up her lip gloss. She didn't have nice make up of her own, so she'd borrow some of Unique's sometimes, and Unique was only too happy to share. She often insisted on playing make-up artist. She loved doing make-overs.
Marley had come to school for fourth period. But Unique had skipped lunch, preferring the sanctuary of the sick bay. She only decided to go to last period, because it was Mr Schue's history class. So, it was where she felt the safest. They were learning about the US soldiers rebelling against their officers during the Vietnam war, which was really cool. Jake was in that class, and so he said hi. But the way he looked at her, full of pity, she knew he knew. At least he had the decency not to mention it.
))))
They walked into the choir room, only to see Finn, Santana, Rachel and Kurt all sitting on or around the grand piano. Finn looked freaked out, and far away. Rachel was all uptight and restless… more than usual. And she kept looking over at Finn, who wasn't noticing anything. Santana seemed determined to pretend Rachel wasn't there. Unique flashed Kurt a smile, and he waved, and then she complemented Ms Santana Lopez on her rockin' outfit that showed off her sexy legs. Unique had on her own high top, leather boots today, and she was killing it! She sat in the front row, next to Marley, with Jake next to her friend. Ryder strolled in, looking extra cute with his Beiber hair, he shook hands with Finn, and looked happy to see the graduates, Unique smiled at him, but he didn't look at her. Brittany and Sam, then Tina and Blaine arrived, and said their hellos. Santana and Brittany looked at each other in a really loving way, and Sam wasn't happy. Finn was too distracted to see it. What was with Finn, he was looking like Simba when he thought he'd gotten his father killed. Then Sugar and Joe arrived, and Artie rolled in. And Kitty was just behind him. Mr Schue was usually first in the room, but today he was late, which was odd. When he did arrive, Mr Schue seemed annoyed or something, his energy was different to how it had been when last period let out.
He came in, didn't greet them and turned to the white board, "Let's all thank the last year's seniors who have volunteered their time to help us," Keeping his back turned, all business. He wrote 'DREAMS'.
Mr Schue turned and pointed, "The theme for Nationals this year is dreams."
Unique smiled, she knew all about having dreams.
"Since, many of the judges we've had in the past haven't been very imaginative…" Mr Schue considered it further, "or in fact, that sober," Mr Schue explicated his plan, "I think it is best to interpret the theme literally, that is why we are going to start with 'Dreamweaver', followed by Annie Lennox's 'Sweet Dreams', and finally bring it home, with Hall & Oats' 'You make my dreams come true'."
Unique's face fell. None of those songs were that great, nor gave her the room to showcase what she could do. We should focus on dreams in the bigger sense, societal change. I live in hope that to society can change, or I have nothing to dream about. She had been practicing 'A Change is gonna come' a cover of Lauryn Hill's take on the Sam Cook classic. That was inspiring. The rest of the group were a silent to.
Blaine interjected, "Um, Mr Schue… we already did 'You make my dreams come true'… in Mash-Up Week… last year," Blaine reminded him.
"What's your point?" Mr Schue sounded testy.
Blaine did a double take, seeing Mr Schue's hostility to his suggestion.
Unique agreed with Blaine that that song wasn't good enough, but his lack of sass was going to cost him, he needed to learn some Unique-flare, she reached into her bra and pull out one of her enhancements.
She spoke with all the attitude Unique was known for, "You gonna need some woman parts if you're gonna sell that." She held it out for Blaine, who didn't look impressed.
Blaine tried, very hesitantly to put his proposal forth to Mr Schue, "That maybe we should all brainstorm ideas that are… fresh."
"His point," Santana quipped, "is that the Trouble Tones wiped the floor with the New Directions when they sang that song with our Adele mash-up."
Mr Schue upped his vitriol, "If I want your snark, Santana, I'll ask for it."
Kitty was shocked to life, "No you did not!"
"Woah!" Sam, just got uncomfortable, and expressed what everyone else in the room was now feeling.
Artie's mouth became a shocked 'o' shape.
Santana backed down too, which was odd and disconcerting.
Blaine agreed, "If it wasn't even good enough to beat a team from our own school, I don't think it's…"
"Blaine!" Mr Schue rudely cut him off.
"Can we maybe talk about the set list," Marley piped up, "I have some great ideas… I've written some original…"
"You guys!" Mr Schue's level of annoyance at the team wanting the slightest input into the song selection was over the top. "Honestly, I don't even know what's going on in this room anymore."
Mr Schue pointedly looked at her, "Unique, you need to tone it down with the whole boob thing."
She froze, feeling like she'd been kicked in the gut. But this is my happy place.
But her teacher had already moved on, as if it were nothing, "Blaine, I'm disappointed in you." He spoke to the whole group, "I show you trust and care and… guidance, and then I turn my back for a moment, and you betray me."
"That's a little strong, Mr Schue…" Artie began to say.
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Finn POV)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Finn couldn't take looking at Mr Schue, dressing down his own club. He saw the look on Unique's face, devastated. He glanced at Blaine, he was shaking his head, frustrated and shamed. It's not right that Mr Schue was lashing out at the club, when really he was just feeling so unbelievably hurt by him. And he had every right to feel that way… but not like this.
"You're mad at me," Finn announced suddenly, getting to his feet, speaking directly to his mentor, "not them. I get it, I'm the one who betrayed you…"
Looks passed between club members, silently mouthing 'betrayal?' A sense of excitement that something scandalous was unfolding went through the choir room.
"Finn, not now!" Mr Schue was snappy and dismissive.
Now I've made it worse.
"Betrayal how?" Rachel asked the question on everyone's lips.
Mr Schue redirected it back to his students, "This is about my club being disrespectful,"
"But…" Finn tried.
"You know what," Mr Schue didn't calm down, if anything he was getting more defensive, "I don't think any of you truly appreciate just how much effort I go to, so that you can be the best."
The room was eerily silent.
"I spend my free time choreographing routines, scanning through countless pages of sheet music…"
Kurt spoke up, "Mr Schue, with all due respect, that's is not what Glee Club is about," He looked around the room, and proudly said "Glee club is where Unique gets to be her fabulous self, gelatin bits and all," Kurt reminded their teacher, "and we all love her for it."
Kurt went over to give her a much-needed hug, and she started crying.
"Glee is where I found support after my own family disowned me," Santana said.
Normally Finn would have been the one with something inspiring to say. But he was lower than a cockroach and should keep his finance-kissing lips closed.
Mr Schue was silent for a bit, and so was everyone else. "You're right," He admitted, "I'm sorry Unique, dress… however you want."
"Winning is just a bonus," Finn started one of his inspirational speeches, "it's not the main thing here, it's about friendship, being a collective, embracing ourselves and each other, a place where the underdogs are the cool ones."
Mr Schue nodded sadly, "A teacher knows his work is done, when his students don't need him anymore."
"We need you Mr Schue," Tina said.
"Good luck with the competition," Mr Schue announced, "I think I'm going to sit this one out."
And before anyone could really stop him, he left.
"Did he just… quit?" Asked Ryder.
"Mr Schue," Finn called after him.
)))))))))))))))))))))))) KURT POV )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Ryder whispered to Kurt what had happened to Unique in gym class. She hadn't been able to talk about it. It was another level of horrid. And Kurt knew a little about the horrors of jocks. The door swung open suddenly.
"Hi Carole," Sam smiled charmingly.
Kurt and Sam were flanking Unique.
Carole didn't suffer fools and so immediately wondered what was up.
"This is Unique," Kurt introduced, "And she's coming for dinner."
"Oh, okay," She was pretty quick to accept the situation.
Kurt explained, "She's had a bad day, and like all of us, could use some good food and good company."
Carole stepped aside, "You're welcome, Unique."
Burt was coming up behind her, "The more the merrier."
Kurt felt Unique breathe a sigh of relief.
To go through life not being able to expect acceptance… he knew that feeling.
And now for the hard bit, "Santana put in her apologies."
Finn's Mom wasn't happy now.
"The whole point of this dinner was for us to get to know her," She stated, annoyed.
"Yeah, umm, about that," Sam said awkwardly, "Finn's not here either."
"What?"
"He and Mr Schue are having some kind of… disagreement…" Kurt hadn't gotten the whole story yet, but he would.
"What?"
"Anyway, Finn kind of took off, I'm not sure where he is." It's not my doing.
Carole was less than impressed. Finn clearly hadn't even called her. They were home for a week, they'd have plenty of time for one lousy dinner. Kurt for one was looking forward to having a good talk with his dad.
))))))))))))))))))) Unique POV ))))))))))))))))))))))))
As she sat in the warm and lively home of the Hudson-Hummels, she didn't feel so alone. Thank the karmic diva magic for one, Mr Kurt Hummel. She'd made it through another day.
A/N: I didn't like how the cat fishing storyline was executed in the show. Though I thought it was a good, and realistic plotline for both Ryder and Unique. While, obviously not a nice thing to do to someone, Unique was coming from a place of weakness, and low-self esteem. Rather than leave the reveal to the last moment for the sake of drama, I prefer it this way, so you can understand what is behind it.