SM owns Twilight.

(CozItRunsInMyBlood /Rose B. Mashal) owns the plot.

(BandMum) is the wonderful beta.

Chapter 14

The sight of my arm terrified me. My teeth began to chatter in horror as I watched my veins becoming bigger and bigger by the second.

"Relax, Bella. It will pass." Although his words were calm, he sounded uncertain, and it only freaked me out even more.

"It burns! Oh, my God, it burns!" The heat became unbearable, and I screamed, my body trembling as I gripped my restraints.

"I'm very sorry. Try to breathe, Bella." Dr. Cullen put his hand on my shoulder in an attempt to keep me still, but he failed. I was shaking violently. I had been so weak lately, I didn't know where my strength came from to grasp the cuffs. This pain was greater than any I had felt before.

"Make it stop! Please, make it stop!" I cried out loudly as the heat broke through my skin. That had to be an illusory sensation from the burning, but when I looked at my arm again, my skin was indeed breaking.

I shrieked in agony as the bluish liquid from the syringe burst through my skin and splashed onto the floor, followed by a large amount of blood. The sight of blood, and the fact that I was losing so much of it, knocked me out immediately.

Dr. Cullen shouted, "Edward!" as darkness crashed down on me.

~WtSGD~

I woke to a loud beeping ringing in my ears, with a steady rhythm that made it even more annoying. My head was pounding and the throbbing in my right arm brought back the awful memory of it bursting open, flooding the place with blood.

I have to admit, I was grateful my arm was still there, and hadn't exploded completely. When I moved my head to look, it was covered in bandages and placed neatly over my stomach, but – there.

The beeping increased and the pauses in between each beep and the next shortened, and I realized I was connected to a heart monitor.

Tilting my head in different directions, I took in my surroundings. Other than the lamp beside me, and Smokey's dimly lit glass cage – the whole lab was a little too dark for my liking.

When I tried to sit up, sharp pain suddenly speared through my back. Wincing, I relaxed back on the bed.

"Don't try to get up."

I was startled by a voice that didn't belong to Dr. Cullen.

"Edward?" My throat hurt, and I sounded hoarse, probably from screaming.

"Yes, Bella," he said from a far corner where I couldn't see him. "Dr. Cullen will be back shortly,"

"How long was I asleep?" I asked, looking towards his voice as it came out of the dark.

"Almost eight hours."

"Oh."

"How do you feel now?" he asked, his tone calm and… sad.

"I don't know. I'm in pain. All over."

"I'm very sorry." Indeed, he sounded sorry.

"It's okay. Did the experiment work?"

"Unfortunately, it didn't. Dr. Cullen will give you details when he comes back. He had to do something upstairs," Edward replied.

"I'm sorry it didn't work. Was it something I did?"

"Not everything is your fault, Bella. There's nothing you need to apologize for. I hope you start realizing that soon."

I didn't say anything, because – like always – I wanted to say 'sorry' for feeling the need to say 'sorry' which seemed to annoy Dr. Cullen, and now, Edward. I wished I didn't make mistakes, but somehow, I always did.

"Don't try to get up," he repeated when he saw me attempt it again, the small motion making me groan in agony.

"I'm no longer strapped to the chair," I said more to myself than to Edward. I couldn't move since any action was very painful, but I felt a little bit calmer knowing I wasn't tied down.

"No. We believe the worst has passed. There's no need for straps."

"Are you… are you a doctor, too?"

"Um, no. Yes. I mean – no." Edward said, and I frowned, but wasn't sure if he could see me. "I'm studying medicine."

I had more questions. I wanted to ask his age, how long he had known Dr. Cullen, and how far he was in medical school. I wanted to ask what he did with his time when he wasn't watching me, and when he actually got the time to study if he was watching me all day long. But all of my questions were silly.

"That's cool," I said before we fell into a deep silence.

I was examining my bandaged arm while replaying the awful experience in my head. The sight of my skin breaking that way was something I'd never imagined. It was so horrible, I couldn't believe my arm was still attached.

My fingers extended from beneath the bandage, and I decided to move them, to test if they still worked. I wanted to make sure that this was my arm and not a replacement.

What a bad idea that was!

With the tiniest twitch of my index finger, pain raged through my arm, and I groaned. I mentally slapped myself for being so stupid.

"I'm sorry you're in so much pain." Edward said. Something in his tone made me want to believe he was sad for me.

"It's okay; I've had worse."

There was a pause before Edward replied, "I wish that you hadn't."

As crazy as it seemed, Edward sounded like he cared.

Cared for the experiment, not you, idiot. The voice in my head reminded me, and I was convinced. It was insane to think anybody would care for someone as worthless as myself.

I guess I dozed off, because the next thing I knew, Dr. Cullen was calling my name. "Bella? Wake up, dear."

Startled, my first thought was to apologize, but I refrained from doing so at the last moment. "Yes, sir." My heart was going a mile a minute, and my throat felt dry.

"Easy. How are you feeling?"

"A little intense pain in my arm and the usual aching in my bones, sir."

"Just a little?"

I wasn't sure how to answer that, but I decided to go with the truth. "It's – uh, agonizing."

Dr. Cullen pressed his lips into a thin line. I wondered if I gave him the wrong answer, not the one he was looking for, and if it irritated him. I wondered if I could take it back and apologize.

Eventually, I said nothing. I waited and watched Dr. Cullen for a few minutes. He seemed to be thinking about a million things, and trying to figure out which to do next.

"I'm deeply sorry for this. Hopefully, your arm will heal soon, and the pain will go away." He started to write something in his notebook.

"May I…"

"You can speak. It's okay."

"May I ask what happened? Why the experiment didn't work?"

"You had an allergic reaction to the formula." His answer was short and unsatisfying, but I didn't dare tell him so, or ask him to explain further.

"So, is that it? The experiment failed?" I was in pain, and I was terrified. If the experiment was called off, I would stop wondering constantly what was going to happen to me next. That should be a relief, right? It wasn't.

Calling it off wouldn't stop my anxiety and worry, it wouldn't end my fears, or ease my pain. I'd be back on the street, sicker and weaker than ever. I'd be dead or killed in a matter of days, that was certain.

I realized I didn't want the experiment to end. Even if it eventually cost me my life, at least it wouldn't be in a corner of an alley. I wouldn't rot for God only knows how long until someone found my body. I would be buried next to my father, as Dr. Cullen promised me.

I wanted to ask him to redo it; I wasn't dead, yet, and I had another arm. Maybe the second time would work. I wanted anything other than to be back on the streets.

"It did fail this time, but we can try again with other formulas I have. Do you still want to go on?" he asked, and my eyes brightened.

"Yes, sir," I replied instantly. "I want to try again. I want this to work."

His smile was soft. "I admire your strength and courage, Bella."

"Thank you, sir." I managed a smile back, my heart warming knowing that I had another chance to stay here. It may be a glass cage, but I didn't feel like a prisoner. Anything was better than the streets. Anything was better than my stepfather's arms.

~WtSGD~

Dr. Cullen wheeled me to my glass room and offered to help me into bed. I declined and managed on my own, even though it jostled my arm. He gave me some morphine and the pain diminished greatly after that. It didn't completely disappear and I still couldn't move my arm without it being agonizing, but at least I could walk a few steps, and sit up in bed without much difficulty.

"Edward is preparing you something to eat now. All you have to do is to eat well, take your medication and rest. We'll have round two of the experiment once your arm is completely healed."

"Yes, sir," I said. The idea of feeling that pain again didn't seem as terrifying as having to leave Dr. Cullen's lab. "Thank you. Please, thank Edward for me." I had a feeling he wouldn't be the one to bring me food, even if he prepared it.

"Will do. Rest now, Bella. I'll go check on Smokey."

I nodded with a smile and watched him walk to Smokey's cage across from mine. I felt dizzy and couldn't concentrate on what he was doing, but I noticed when he took his phone out of his pocket a few minutes later. He looked at it for a second before putting it back, then walked towards the inside door that led into his house. He disappeared for a minute, then came back with a tray.

I thanked him again when he was about to leave, then I whispered 'Thank you,' to one of the security cameras in the corner of my room. Obviously, Edward didn't want to interact with me more than necessary. Maybe at all.

~WtSGD~

I devoured the soup in what felt like less than a minute, then I felt the need to use the bathroom immediately. Thankfully, Dr. Cullen had put my bandaged arm in a sling, which made moving easier. The pain was still there, but not as intense since my arm was secured in place.

Slowly, I made my way to the bathroom. I took care of business as quickly as possible but got my gown wet as I tried to splash my face and neck with some water. I wondered if Dr. Cullen had turned up the heat, because I felt annoyingly hot.

As I went into the closet to change, I heard some humming coming from one of the corners. I was in the same area when I heard the footsteps the other day, and I realized that the closet must be connected to the upper floor with an air vent or something. The humming was loud enough for me to realize it was two men talking.

I knew I shouldn't, but I couldn't stop myself. I walked into the corner and pressed my ear to the wooden wall, hoping that I could listen to what was going on upstairs.

Once my ear was flat to the wall, my eyes widened. I couldn't believe how clearly I could hear them, as if they were standing just a yard away, not on the second floor: Dr. Cullen and Edward.

"Allergy? That's the best you can come up with?" That was Edward.

I frowned. His question made it seem like the allergic reaction Dr. Cullen told me I had was a lie. I never thought he was lying to me before, but now I had my doubts.

"Technically, she did have an allergic reaction to the formula."

"People sneeze, cough, or vomit when they have an allergic reaction, Carlisle. They may choke or get a rash; their veins and skin don't burst open like a piñata and they almost bleed to death!"

The fact that he called him by his first name made me think that Edward may be more than just his assistant. But what did I know? Maybe they had a good working relationship.

Edward's words were convincing; as far as I knew, people don't nearly bleed to death because of an allergy. But I could be wrong.

"She believed me, didn't she?"

My frown deepened at Dr. Cullen's response. It confirmed that he wasn't telling the truth, or was hiding it from me.

What could it be that happened to me, then? Admittedly, it was the weirdest and most terrifying thing I'd ever seen. But I was alive still. For now.

"Does she have any other choice than to believe you? I hate this, Carlisle. I hate it!" I was surprised at how angry Edward sounded. What made him so angry? I didn't dare to think it was for me. I was worthless.

"She agreed to this, Edward. Keep that in mind."

"She didn't have any other choice!" Edward yelled; his voice was so loud I knew I wouldn't have had to press my ear to the wall to hear it.

Dr. Cullen was unbelievably calm when he replied. "But she did choose. Think of it as the only way to help her. She has a fatal disease; she would have died anyway. Now she has a chance to heal if this all works out well."

My stomach turned, and I felt tears closing my throat. I wished I could tell Edward that he didn't have to hate the situation I was in. Dr. Cullen was right; it was my choice.

I wanted to tell him that the few weeks I spent here were the most protected and least painful of my whole life. I wished he could hear about my past and compare it to my present. I would rather have the experiment done and re-done every single hour than go back to the streets with the risk of being found again by the monster.

But those memories were forever in my head, engraved on my body, and will never come out on my tongue.

There was a pause before Edward spoke again. This time his voice was lower, more defeated than calm. "She breaks my fucking heart, Carlisle. I wish she wasn't scared and in pain all the time."

I swallowed thickly, tears flowing heavily down my face. It wasn't a shocker that I was pathetic, but it was a punch in the gut to hear how sad it made Edward feel. It was even sadder that I didn't deserve his sympathy – I was nobody. Nothing.

"The pain might go away if the experiment works out. But she's too damaged to stop being scared, son. The wounds on her soul may never heal."

~WtSGD~

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Hugs and kiss,
~Cozy.