Knock.
Is this the right suite?
Knock.
Maybe she didn't hear me...
Knock.
She doesn't answer her phone either...
Knock.
Thank god.
/Trigger warning: abuse and self-harm/
"I'm here"
Rose didn't speak. Instead, she hung up the phone and gathered all of her strength to get up and open the door. Jack's heart pounded so hard it may as well would have come out of his chest.
The second he heard his phone ring; he knew something was wrong. He knew nothing else mattered upon seeing all the messages and missing calls on the screen. He had only one thing in his mind... he had to get Rose. His blood pumped harder than ever before; he could feel his heartbeat on his ears; it resembled the canyons in the war. He left everything and ran up the stairs to the first-class deck.
He found the girl crying, still in her pijamas. He picked her up lovingly and let her cry and unburden in his arms. As sweet as he could, Jack asked which way was her bed... she signaled upstairs, so that's where he took her. He recognized her stuff when he entered, it did look like the room of a teenager.
He took off his shoes as he could and laid down on the bed with Rose still in his arms. The poor soul wrapped all over Jack, his scent calmed her down. Jack's thoughts were killing him. What happened? Why? Where was her mother? Where was Cal? Did she need to go away for a while? Could he help her? Would she need any more help? Was she considering hurting herself again?
When Rose's crying had eased, she did her best to try to explain. She didn't know where the strength came from, usual thoughts came down to what would her mother say? What would her bosses say? What would the Hockley's say? That's until she arrived to the question that may have saved her that day... what would Molly say? She was going to tell Jack. There was no going back now.
"He hit me"
"What?"
Rose's dazed mind started to divagate, unable to hear Jack. Maybe... just maybe I deserved it? He was right... I shouldn't have kissed Jack, I totally deserved every single one of them...
"Rose! Look at me. Where?"
I'm so stupid. What did I get myself into? Why did I call him? Everything would be fine if I hadn't met him... I'm everything Cal said... I'm a whore... I feel dirty...
"Rose! Are you there? Baby, answer me please"
Jack is a good person. He wouldn't let me cheat. He wouldn't want me to be a bad person, he would help me to be good. He cares about me...
A person like Rose didn't know how to react when all the sudden someone cared about her and made her feel special. She didn't think she was special; she didn't think she deserved the love and care... as destiny would have it, she trusted Jack.
"I deserved it. I shouldn't have kissed you. I'm sorry"
"No, don't you dare say that... don't you ever dare think you deserve anything of that bullshit" Hearing Rose express this way about herself sent a lump in Jack's throat, and an anger he'd never experienced before. His thumb traveled to her tear-stained cheek, caressing her. "Look at me... it doesn't matter if you kissed somebody else, it is not an excuse to hit someone. Nothing. Nothing is an excuse to hit someone."
The next part, hurt like a thousand knives in his heart... but nothing compared to the way Rose must have felt. "If you feel like it shouldn't have happened... if you're sorry it happened, if you regret it... then I'm sorry too. I should have respected your relationship if there's someone to blame that's me. Please don't blame yourself. I was the one who wrapped you with words, with actions" Jack put her hand on his chest, right above his heart "I promise... I won't let that happen again"
A load of guilt had been released from Rose's shoulders, even her breathing had steadied.
"Did you tell your mom?" She nodded "what did she say?"
"That I deserved it" Her voice broke.
Jack hugged her tight until she moaned in pain. He asked her where she was hurt, she signaled her forearms and back. Rose's world felt gray, lifeless, pointless. Her body felt heavy, and she couldn't escape from it. Numbness. Her eyes unfocused, a lost look on her face. Even her skin was paler.
A few minutes later, the boy arrived from a quick and exhaustive search in her bathroom for numbing cream. It wouldn't numb her heart, but at least it would help with the physical pain.
Their eyes had a silent conversation regarding Rose feeling uncomfortable taking her shirt off, but she trusted Jack way too much. Besides, it was nothing he hadn't seen before. She didn't have a bra on, but she figured she'd only cover her breasts with her hands. She felt vulnerable as it was, there was no way she could have felt more. At that point, she didn't care if he saw her or not.
He sat behind her on the bed and carefully started to rub the cream on the red marks on her back. He couldn't stand the heat of the anger building upon his body. The fucking bastard dared to use a belt. I'm going to kill him if I see him. Jack had to hold back his willing to cover her in kisses. Fucking life. He cured her arm as well, he understood she had put her arm in front of her in hopes to stop that bastard.
"Jack" Rose called, barely in a whisper
She put her hands on her pants' waistband. No please no. The marks were far worse than the ones on her back. I'm going to kill him. I am going to kill him. Jack held her hands and helped her lay on her stomach, then he grabbed a pillow and handed it to her so she could have something to hug...
"Something that manages to calm me down when I don't feel good is drawing on my skin, maybe you could try it? And see if it makes you feel better?"
"I can't draw"
Jack got up, opened the drawer by the nightstand and handed her a black pen.
"As long as you can hold a pen you can draw"
Blue lines and circles appeared on her thigh, resembling a mandala. Tears started to fall in her puffy red cheeks and fell apart as they reached the end of her already tilted down head. She couldn't hold back her anger. Anger with Cal, anger with herself, anger with her mother, anger with life.
The lump in her throat growing bigger and stronger, as well as the pain in her chest. She felt like it was about to explode at any moment, to release some pressure, she pushed the pen deep in her skin several times. She felt relief when the physical pain hit, it was much easier to handle than emotional pain. Jack reacted quickly before she could injure herself, and calmly retrieved the pen from her. When he turned around to hide it, Rose lost all control of her actions. He turned around fast enough to stop her from hitting herself. He held her fists in his hands in front of them while she cried herself out.
After five minutes, Jack was positive she wouldn't start hitting again, so he released her clenched fists and pulled her into a hug. When her head was well hidden in his shoulder, she felt safe enough to wrap her legs around him as well. Jack just held her, his hands traveling soothingly all over her back, frequently squeezing her shoulders and lightly patting her backside, letting her know she was safe, and she wasn't alone.
12:26
Rose had fallen asleep in Jack's arms. Anyone could enter the suite at any minute, the anxiety was killing him from the inside. What was he going to do if her mother saw him? Or worse, what was he going to do if he saw Caledon?
He didn't know if they were even on the ship, they could very well be somewhere in Barranquilla. Yes, he'd rather think that. What hurts worse? Forgetting Rose? Or having Rose by his side and being unable to help her? He'd rather think what the best for Rose was. Jack was never the kind of person to put himself first, his needs were always at the end of the list... a strategy it has been working well until now. Could it change? His arms were starting to get numb.
13:26
Yes, everyone was definitely off the ship right now. Thank God. The redhead was starting to wake up.
"Hey beautiful"
After an hour of thinking, he decided he would stay by her side, just in case she needed anything... a distraction, someone to talk to... a shoulder to cry on...
"Mom and Cal are off board... just thought you might want to know that" yes, yes I want, thank you. "I'm alone for the rest of the day..."
"No, you're not. I'm here"
They cuddled for another while and decided to head downstairs. Jack was positive he would make her day better. After he made her drink some ibuprofen, he tried to make her eat.
"I'm not hungry" was all she answered.
He decided he'd let it slip for now, due to the circumstances. They settled on the TV couch and Rose picked a movie, something to distract herself from reality. She thought her choice had made Jack want to leave, but he stayed. He stayed and cuddled her, didn't even look at his phone once.
"I didn't know he had sisters" his voice startled her
"Are you paying attention?"
"Yeah"
"I thought you didn't like One Direction"
"I don't, but you do" she smiled, nobody had ever done that for her "at least after this i might be able to tell who is who"