Crazy Love

Alice keeps playing this song, this really stupid song, and for some reason, it keeps replaying in my mind. You know what that's like. It's pure aggravation. I hate it; I hate, I freaking hate that song.

… Because it makes me think of Bella. Constantly. And I know for certain that nothing will ever compare to her.

There isn't another girl that gets to me the way she did and still does. God knows I questioned if I could find that same damn feeling around other girls, but it's not there. That spark and that pull will always belong to her. It's crazy love, the rare type people long for in movies, and we had it since that first night.

"Yeah, buddy, you'll always belong to Bella." Stupid inner monologue. "That's why you keep driving by her house and this bar. Because you can't get her out of your mind."

That voice just won't stop nagging me. If this keeps up much longer, I'm gonna need some mental help.

So here I am, outside of Rockerfellas, sitting in my car thinking about when we met three years ago. I can blame it all on Alice since she had to see Jasper Whitlock and was in need of a ride. She was absolutely sure the sun rose and set on him. I could get in a couple of words, like yeah or huh, to seem interested. Bella's name originally went in one ear and out the other if she had mentioned it. When I pulled up near the entrance, there was a stunning girl waving at us. My original intent wasn't to stay or go inside, but, lIke a lost puppy, I followed her. It was a compulsion, really.

So after some strange looks from my sister, Introductions were made. They had recently become friends, so recently that, thanks to my goldfish attention span, the details slipped my mind.

Bella didn't waste any time getting to know me that night. She was everything I wasn't expecting. Simply sitting with her was relaxing, like we had known each other for years. Talking to her came with ease, and those moments were everything. But how she leaned in and softly rubbed her fingers against my face… that made me breathe hard. It was an unexpected gesture that left me wanting for more.

At some point, Jasper and a slightly drunk Ali left. The girl couldn't hold her liquor. God, I was thankful because I wouldn't have to clean my car again. She always heaved after a few Heineken. Jazz had a goofy grin on his face when they were leaving. Maybe he would still be smiling in the morning, but I didn't care.

That was one of the best nights of my life. After the bar closed sometime after two, I took Bella home. When I cracked lame jokes, her laughter, which made you forget your name and place of birth, hit me like a ton of bricks. Over the next few months, it became one of my freaking favorite sounds.

She kissed me first, taking her time to draw me closer. I would have been a fool to hesitate. When either of us paused for air, my mind cried out not to stop, and that was all it took for Bella Swan to have me to herself. Friendship be damned. This was my girl now.

First, I fell hard for her love of life and her spontaneous nature. Those deep brown eyes could see right into my soul, and I wanted all of Bella's affection. Our heart-to-heart talks brought us closer. Morning picnics and lazy afternoons spent in a hammock together sometimes weren't enough. We gave each other all of our love long into the night. She was always tucked in close, with her head on my heart, when we fell asleep.

This was for keeps, and I never questioned the strength of our relationship.

We were amazing together.

Then her step-sister, Angela, came home from college.

She was charm-free and unpleasant at best. Ang didn't hide how jealous she was of Bella, or our love. That was when their parents began to see us differently, and, to this day, I still don't understand why they believed Ang's lies about us. They assumed I was smoking weed, but they took her words as the truth. Angela had, among all of her upstanding friends, a few assholes who came over high. Of course, this was when no one else was home. It was easy to blame me, but there wasn't proof, only suspicion. Being able to see Bella became a challenge then.

Ang had done enough damage to cause their parents to question how much we loved each other. We did whatever was necessary to be together. Her spontaneity diminished. I fucking wanted to fix this problem.

There was the option to run away, but that wasn't the life I wanted for Bella. Eloping crossed my mind. As much as that appealed, it wasn't right. I was the logical thinker but barely able to think clearly. If I'd ever mentioned eloping, she would go through it without considering the ramifications.

And damn it, that freaking song ran through my mind again.

''Nothing compares to you, nothing compares to you."

Thanks for the reminder. I let out a heavy sigh and kept remembering.

So I left, only because she urged me to finally go to Washington State. I had put off school for a few years. I thought maybe, just maybe, if we let some fucking time pass, then we could be together. This was not a break-up or an ending or whatever kind of pause you want to call it.

Spending some time apart was the only sane choice.

Being without her was hell on earth. My dear sister would send pictures or texts, but I told her to quit. If we couldn't be together, seeing Bella's face was going to rip my damn heart out of my chest. There wasn't much left besides throwing myself into studying and getting a diploma. Not thinking about her was as bad as longing for her.

Long hours spent working turned into a law degree, which might help her parents see me and us in a better way. Time had certainly passed. Would Bella still want me? Could we pick up where we left off?

Alice let me know that Angela left town a few months ago, with her cokehead boyfriend hanging on for whatever he could get. The truth about the weed had finally come out. I felt like a freed man walking out of prison, especially when Bella's father called to meet for an 'overdue apology.' I prayed it wasn't a joke or a con to get me out of her life forever. But Mr. Swan was humble about the situation and asked for my forgiveness. Cautiously, in return, I asked for his blessing, which he offered. In my mind, it was more than overdue, but those words were better kept to myself.

We could be together.

The memory of her warm smile kept me going.

We had a forever waiting on us.

I checked the time again; where were Jazz and Ali? They promised to be here by eight. Shit, the time was only five after, but I'd been waiting here thirty minutes. The ring in my pocket was burning a hole through the fabric. Deep breathing wasn't slowing my thoughts, but the sound of Jasper's Mustang did the trick.

Part of me wanted to jump out and kiss her beautiful face endlessly. When I heard that laugh, and knowing that we were only a few feet apart, I paused to listen.

Bella was talking about me, and her face was lit up beautifully.

"I'll always love Edward. We're going to be together despite everything." Her smile captivated me as much as her words. "Sure, you can introduce me to any guy you want, Ali, but it's always going to be him, your brother. Like that annoying song you were singing. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, has or ever will compare to Edward Cullen."

That was my girl, the one I would love forever.

It was time to whisper those words in her ear as soon as I could.