A quick toe into decaf was all Po needed to attain pure awesomeness.
"Stop Panda!" warned Master Shifu, shaking his staff with dire anger. "If you do toe to that beverage, it will spell doom for us all!"
Po laughed and slapped a caramel onion all over Shifu's face. He was unstoppable in the face of all adversity.
"Panda! This must cease! I beg of you!" Shifu cried out through the thick onion coating.
Just then, Po's toe glowed. It went from green to blue to red to pink and then to magenta. "How perceptive of me, Master Shifu!" said the hyperactive fat dude with the many charms and charismas.
"Panda! Such toe nonsense will destroy all of this glorious land in which we all love!" shouted Shifu.
Po laughed harder and continued dipping all of his precious ursine toes into each latte. This was where Starbucks met the Starbutts.
That was because Po's rear started to glow rainbow colours as well. He looked like a fat firefly (like the one that died in that one Disney movie about the frogs).
Mantis was by the doorway, eating of a croissant. It was big and valuable.
Shifu eyed the small guy and screeched about the earth's protection. Mantis nodded in approval and skittered away to go find the lost boiz.
Po was marvelous with his tush presence. He started to fly upwards into the heavens like a belated mongoose. He snickered at the level of bliss his rump was attaining due to the decaf toe-dipping.
Shifu had finally had enough. He unleashed his robe, baring his solid pecs and abs to the world. Mr. Ping saw the abs out of the corner of his eye and was so enthusiastic about the sight that he exploded into many poultry bits.
"My father is dead..." Po wept. His tears leaked down upon the temple. Shifu captured the tears in his palm and swallowed them, expanding his pecky-abby goodness tenfold.
Mantis finally arrived with the rest of the Furious Five. They posed heroically and yelled at Po's fat idiocy.
"This is where the fun begins..." Po anakined. He then powered up his toe ki to its maximum potential. This is because the Dragon Warrior is cooler than most chickens.
"I cannot argue with such logic..." Shifu said, defeated as his abs wept bitterly.
"Do not give up, Master!" cried Monkey. "You just gotta believe in your heart."
Shifu nodded. He then flexed with so much wholesome prowess. His abs inverted and delved in between his firm manly pecs. The abs emerged moments later, holding the pulsating organ it had just extracted.
Viper pointed with her tail because she was an arm-and-leg-hater. "Look! Master Shifu has found his true belief!"
Tigress's eyes widened until they fell out. She put her contacts back in and then shouted out with glee. "I believe in our master's heart too!"
The others nodded and all held hands (except for Viper, of course). They chanted a deeply spiritual song about toothpaste scum for twelve hours straight as Shifu believed extremely hard about his beloved heart.
Po saw the heart from his butt and glowed even brighter. "AWESOME!" he shouted. He then jumped down and laid his hands upon Shifu's organic beatbox.
"See the truth, Panda?" asked Shifu.
Po nodded and then kicked his ears off of his own head, powering down his deadly keister once and for all.
"I am so proud of you!" said Shifu, smiling like a conch shell.
"Why do you sound like Dustin Hoffman?" asked Po.
"Because I am actually your father," said Shifu. He then released his own toes into the stratosphere. They blazed through the sky like holy comets.
"AWESOME!" cried Po, gawking like a dignified piggy bank.
THE END