Five is good at keeping his emotions in, He always has been. For some reason that changed today.
He was in his room in the umbrella academy just staring at the roof watching the lights the cars passing by made. The idea of sleep is long gone. It was as if he was wide awake but desperately tired at the same time.
Numb.
He sighed and got up from his bed, letting his feet take him downstairs to the kitchen, but he couldn't eat anything. Instead he trudged to the couch finding the stiffness more comfortable.
For once in a long time he allowed himself to close his eyes, and try desperately try to get in some sleep.
that was a mistake.
The air was hot and smokey allot different to what he was used to. He found it harder to breath in and out without coghing up smoke every minute. He looked around desperately trying to figure out where he was.
Everything was destroyed into meaniless Ruble he walked around calling out his family's name already feeling horribly alone.
Then he saw it. He was walking towards a trolly when he tripped and stumbled over an outstretched arm holding an eyeball.
Five clumsyly scrambled to find the rest of the body but when he moved the big chunk of rock he wished he hadn't it was his number ones and it wasn't alive he looked on horror at the glassy eyes staring unblinking up at him as if saying how could you? He looked around and saw the rest of his siblings in the same state.
He couldn't hold it in anymore and emptied his stomach he winced at the smell but it was better then the stench of burning that he couldn't get out of his nose.
He couldn't take his eyes off his family unbelieving that they could possibly be dead. Sure he may not have the best relationship with them but they were still better than nothing and they treated him good like a brother. How did five repay them? By leaving trying to stupid time travel even when their father said no.
He did this, he couldn't protect them not just them the world.
Five shot upward with a desperate grasp for air. Hid clammy hands clutching the materialof the clinch underneath him.
He trudged the streets for days eating nothing but scraps every now and then passing a body each time making the voices in his head louder.
His eyesdarted around the roomfervently taking everything in, in quick glances. His eyes strained around the dark room trying to remember where he was.
"Five, I have come to offer you a job. O want you to be my assassin." He was selfish he took the job immediately not caring about anyone or anything. He had no idea what a nightmare it would be and what kind of person it would make him.
He was alone no one was with him, he was safe
Cha cha and hazel walked around the aisles In the store calling out to him "five, come out come out where ever you are" thier creepy mask's seem like something from the worst horror movies. Five moved ever so slightly and was immediately surrounded by gun fires he curled in a ball and clutched his ears desperately trying to get the ringing away he couldn't shake the feeling that one wrong move and he would be dead
Hesqueezed his eyes shut trying to get his eratick heartbeat and shawls breaths back to normal befor it developed into a full blown panic attack. He forced his fingers to release thier death grip on the couch to instead press against his eyes. He let out a shuddering breath his limbs shaking uncontrollably. He swung his legs off the couch and roughly pushed his hands through his hair. 'He and his family are safe' he told himself
It was his family again FaceTime alive and well holding hands together looking up at the sky when five turned around she dreaded the feeling of his lunch coming up his stomach again it was nukes raining down hellfire on the buildings and his family didn't do anything just stood there and died five watched again had a chest stopped moving in the eyes looking strangely towards him as if saying 'you did it again'
He could hear his heart racing In his ears and nothing else. He forced his legs to move back to his bedroom but only made it halfway there his legswobbled and he had to lean against the wall for support. He did what he always did made mental barriers to stop his mind getting to all the bad thoughts before everything came crashing down but this time the walls smashed letting everything out.
"Please, please! We did nothing wrong! Please don't hurt me!" It was a family he was ordered to kil completely inosent. But five didn't listen to thier cries instead killing them without even flinching when he heard the screens of thier children.
Now he did flinch and all he could he was the screams and pleas of his victims he slid down the wall and let the tears fall curling in on himself completely drowned out from the real world and stuck in horrible memories from his past
He was on the floor unable to move from being shot at least three times but still being alive but the excitement was short lived when he saw his family and Lila were not so lucky and now he looked into the baral of a new gun just waiting for his pain to be lifted. The wait was endless even though only seconds.
His thought became tight and his heart became as loins as a Beet of a drum. He took deep breaths desperatelytrying to regain control he stood up feeling completely dizzy and walked to where he thought was the courtyard the tears didn't stop
He was a monster
He ruined his family's chance to be happy
They don't love him
He crumpled to his knees and looked to the sky but even the Beauty of the stars couldn't help him. He couldn't take it anymore he couldn't hide from everything anymore it just hurtso much. He took a long deep breath screamed just screamed into nothing at all.
Because what else could he do but scream.