Yes, this is late. We had a critical incident at school a few weeks ago. Four days left and counting!
I cannot thank Rebecca enough for everything – for being an ear for not only CF but allowing me to vent about things. And for not spoiling the most awesome episode of Fire ever – all I got from her was 'yes you need to watch it and you'll want to watch it again and again' Yes R you were right and I've watched it many many times since. Thank you for editing this chapter. And I apologise to you now for making you tear up over this chapter.
Shout out to Jewel2687 who pretty much hit the nail on the head about this chapter in her review for Week 21 and for all the lovely chats.
And to ChicagoLover who in her own words has been '(im)patiently waiting for this update' and reminded me at least twice over the weekend about it.
Disclaimer – I obviously didn't write the song. That was Westlife's 'Swear It Again'. If you ever want a good cry listen to their song 'I'll See You Again'
I hope you like this chapter – I poured my heart and soul into the chapter. If you are enjoying it, please actually let me know in a review or some other way ~ Em
Week Twenty Two
~ Candidate is the size of a papaya ~
Matt found that sleep had slowly started to leave him, an air of fog starting to dissipate. The sheets surrounding him were cold. Without cracking an eyelid open, he reached for his watch to find the time. Groping around on the night stand, he couldn't feel his watch. Finally, he decided he needed to open his eyes, and he came face to face with their wedding photo, a soft toy and water bottle. This wasn't his side of the bed. Turning over fully, he looked around from his laying position on the bed to find himself alone in the room. Scary as it was, he had become used to this.
Groaning slightly Matt stretched out his limbs enjoying the feeling of his muscles relaxing. There hadn't been much of that over the past week. Not that anyone at Firehouse 51 didn't already know, but the past week had confirmed to Matt that those chairs that were both in the waiting room and within the rooms themselves were the some of the most uncomfortable chairs known to Chicago. It had been a long, long week for the Casey family, one that Matt wasn't going to be able to move past for a long time to come. Thinking back on it all last night was the first time in over a week that he had even been able to get a decent night's sleep. Stretching out his back one more time he pulled himself up into a seated position, shivering slightly at the cold he felt without a shirt on. They had predicted that 1 to 3 inches of snow would be headed to the Chicago area over the coming week and the temperatures had started to drop further and further. It might be time to pull out those thick puffer jackets.
Finally, after giving his eyes one final rub and running his hand over his face he dragged himself out of bed and over to the chest of drawers to find a t-shirt to wear. He gave a small chuckle to himself as he opened the drawer to find that his t-shirts had been once again reorganised, Gabby had obviously had been on an organisation spree last week when she had come home after her shopping expedition with her mother and had a go at his closet as well. This time she had seemingly gone with organising by colour - last time it had been by her favourites, so many of the blue colours had been close to the front. Knowing that, he pulled out the first light blue shirt he could find. Slipping it over his head he tugged at the sleeves to make sure that they were as down as far as they could be - he was going to need to check the thermostat and heat the house up slightly. In the back of his mind he knew that his phone had an app to change the temperature, he just never remembered to use it. This house came with so many bells and whistles and he could never remember them all - Gabby had been so much better with it all.
As he made his way out of the closet, an item that had been placed on the bedroom armchair caught his eye. It was the canvas from Adriana and Miguel - it still needed to be hung up. Matt took a deep breath as he picked it up. What was he to do with it now? It couldn't stay in this bedroom for any longer.
Gabby had mentioned in passing very early in the week previous that she wanted to change a bedroom into Smudge's nursery. Matt had been initially very surprised; he just hadn't thought about it. They had such a big master bedroom that he hadn't thought very far past Smudge sleeping in their room. He just figured that they would move the armchairs out and it would honestly be big enough for a crib and change table. They still hadn't really had a conversation about all of the particulars about it all, she hadn't even told him which room she wanted to use for Smudge. However, without telling her, he had roped in Kelly and Antonio one afternoon last week, the day after Adriana had come around with the present, and they had cleared out the room next to their own. Yes, it had a balcony with a door leading out to it, but Antonio had assured him that they could quite easily baby proof the room, in particular that door, as well as the rest of the house. Sighing resignedly Matt picked up the picture and slipped into the room.
Taking in the scene around himself, he looked at the fairly empty room. All that was left was an armchair, a chest of drawers and bookcase. Easing himself into the chair he allowed himself the opportunity to think about what might have been, an opportunity that he hadn't allowed himself at all since he had heard about the accident at Chicago Med. He let his mind wander about how the nursery would look like - how much input would he have? He really wanted to make their own nursery furniture, nothing big or over the top, just the crib, change table and possibly even a rocking chair. Antonio and Kelly laughed openly in his face when he had first mentioned it when they were moving furniture, but Kelly had ended up finding plans online to what seemed to be an easy enough rocking chair. Antonio had even offered his spare room for Matt to build it so they could keep it as a surprise for Gabby, although he had stopped short of offering to help with it. That would have only ended in disaster. Kelly did offer his help, after the job he had managed to help with at the school library he fancied himself okay with all sorts of tools.
Matt had laughed and taken both of them up on their offers, he had been planning on finding some darker wood for the nursery. With the openness of this room he thought that a dark wood would work well in this room. The two friends of Matt had gone back and forth about the decorating of the room. Matt, himself had been in two minds about it - on one hand he had told them that it was going to be really Gabby's choice as to how the nursery was going to be decorated but that hadn't stopped either Antonio or Kelly who were fighting over whether to have a firefighting theme or police theme. But on the second hand Matt was supporting Kelly's argument of having a firefighting theme. Christie had sent him a photo last week of something that she had found on pinterest - it had been a sticker for the wall of a firehose that was connected to a fire hydrant and was spurting water from the nozzle. As an added bonus the name on the image that Christie had found was 'Case', it was like it was made for them. Matt hadn't been able to show it to Gabby yet, but it was something that he definitely wanted in Smudge's room.
Tapping the edge of the canvas thoughtfully he just couldn't bring himself to hang it on the wall - not just yet. Rather he figured that it would be much easier to leave it leant up against the wall, standing there until the time was just right. Rolling up this sleeve slightly to give him access to his watch he noticed that it was much later than he would have expected. It was time to have a shower and actually get moving for the day.
After a long and hot shower Matt reached out for his cell phone after noticing the persistent flashing light. There were numerous messages from family - both his and Gabby's as well as a few from the fire house. Scrolling through the notifications he made a mental note to reply to a few later in the day and ring some others. Noticing a particular name and message caused his breath to hitch and he was instantly transported back to when Boden had received the call that something had happened to Gabby and how everything had unfolded afterwards
*Flashback*
It had been a slow day the type where the only calls were for Ambo. Casey snuck Dawson one last 'Matt' smile as Ambo were called out for yet another call. 'Stay safe,' he mouthed as she squeezed his shoulder on the way out. It was the little touches that they still had, for the most part they were the utmost professionals. They still were two of the officers at Firehouse 51 and no one coming in was to be any the wiser to their relationship.
Ambo had been gone for a long while when Casey had decided that it was time to do something other than sit and watch TV. He ended up sending the Truck Company out to do drills and Mouch and Otis had spent most of the hour complaining that it was freezing. Kidd had even made a crack about certain people, who should remain nameless, that obviously needed to release some pent up energy.
"Oi Otis, put your back into it!" shouted Cruz from edge of the apparatus floor.
"Don't see any of you squad guys doing this," he retorted breathing heavily as the ladder came back down to the ground. Cruz would only laugh in response. "Hey Lieutenant why is it that we're the only ones doing something?"
"We all know that those Squad guys couldn't do all of these drills… They would pass out after a few moments of lugging these ladders around," Herrmann joked.
"Come on… Switch around, let's go again," ordered Casey as Severide too abandoned the poker game to see what was happening. "Mouch at the end, Kidd up the front this time… Borelli you're in this time, switch out with Herrmann. Move!"
"Lieutenant Casey!" came Boden's voice from the doorway that lead directly into the hallways. There was something in their chief's voice that made everyone stop and look, even Severide took a few steps out of the safety of the apparatus floor and out into the cool wind without a thick jacket on. Casey looked Boden straight in the eye trying to see if he could work out what was going on. But Boden's eyes gave away nothing. "A word in my office."
Casey slowly made his way towards the door after ordering Herrmann to take over for him. A somber mood had overtaken the entire house. Had it not been for that, Herrmann or Mouch might have made some crack about Casey being in some sort of trouble. Boden waited for Casey to pass him before motioning with a few fingers for Severide to join them.
"Chief?" Casey questioned as he nodded at Severide who had quietly slipped into the room.
"Casey..." Boden sighed audibly. Casey narrowed his eyes at the chief, his senses tingling. That tone was just evidence that something wasn't right at all. Boden came to stop in front of Casey, "Casey..." his voice slow and deliberate as he brought a hand down on the younger man's shoulder, "I've had a call from Med. There's been an incident with Ambo 61…"
"Is Gabby okay?" Casey questioned hurriedly, his blood pressure rising. He could hear the blood rushing in his ears. Boden gave Severide a worried look with a quick shake of his head, a motion that wasn't missed by Casey. "What? What is it?"
"Matt, I don't know. I've only spoken to Maggie."
"What aren't you telling me?" demanded Matt. Behind his back Severide nodded encouragingly at the Battalion Chief.
"All that I've been told is that Gabby's been injured… Wait Casey," he stopped his truck lieutenant from rushing headlong out of the door. "We don't know what has happened. But she's a fighter…" Exchanging one last glance with Severide, an unspoken conversation passed between to two. Fear flooded through Casey as he was instantly transported back to the last time he had received a phone call from Boden telling him that she had collapsed, not knowing what had happened with Gabby. In his mind it was happening all over again. He just couldn't go through that again, they had come too far. He couldn't, wouldn't do it again.
"Come on Case - I'll take you to Med. That wife and baby of yours are going to be fine. Sure it's nothing. They're probably just taking extra care with the candidate of yours," reassured Severide as he steered his shell-shocked friend out of the office.
"We're right behind you Kelly," Boden stated. Huffing, Boden watched his two officers disappear out of view. Moving fast he rounded up the rest of the house to get them on the road to Med.
*End flashback*
He sighed deepily as he pocketed his phone. He would deal with all of those messages later.
Matt slowly made his way downstairs, when around halfway down he smelt something cooking. That couldn't be right. Turning the corner, he stopped to drink in the sight of Gabby waltzing around the kitchen cooking breakfast and singing softly to the radio. Straining to hear the words, the words and tune sounded familiar but there was something that wasn't quite right about it. Maybe it was just something that he just hadn't heard in a very long time. Softly he padded closer towards the sink, trying not to gain the attention of his working wife
'I'm never gonna say goodbye 'cause I never want to see you cry. I swore to you my love would remain. And I swear it all over again…" he heard her softly sing. It wasn't very often that he ever heard her sing, but he soaked it all in. He gave a wry smile, he wondered how much of these words were actually sinking in for her. Those words were hitting home pretty hard given the week they had both been through.
They hadn't ever realised how close they had come to losing everything last week in a way that would have plunged them back into a world of darkness. Slipping the phone out of his back jeans pocket, Matt found the app on his phone to turn the stereo up. As the music volume started to build he moved his way over to press up against Gabby's back, his hand making quick work of turning the stove off where Gabby had been cooking and pushing the pan towards the back burner. A short gasp left her. Resting a hand on her bump, he brushed away some hair so he was able to attack her neck with kisses. Gabby's head lulled to side to give him better access, trying to hold in a moan as he hit a particularly sensitive spot.
Turning on the spot so she was able to look him in the face, Gabby reached up to place a gentle kiss on his lips. But Matt was having none of that, he quickly deepened the kiss as he spun her around and backed her up so she was pinned against the wall.
"Happy birthday baby," she breathed when he finally released her. Matt felt a smile spread across his face. Gabby had only been released from hospital two nights ago after finally been given the all clear from Doctor Peterson. Matt let her go and made his way over to the stereo and turned the music up a little louder. Coming back he gathered up Gabby back into his arms and started to sway around the empty space in their kitchen.
"But," she protested. "Your birthday. I was going to have breakfast ready for you…"
"Is that why you weren't there when I woke up?"
"I know you haven't slept well in the hospital. You were so snuggled into the sheet when I woke up I thought it best to leave you," Gabby confessed as she snuggled into his arms just a little bit more. Matt breathed in her shampoo and tugged her tighter.
"I don't need anything more for my birthday Baby. You and Smudge are home where you belong and you're both safe. That's the only present I need baby girl."
Gabby gave him a soft smile as she left her head over his chest, content to listen to his heartbeat. "I'm sorry that I made you worry last week," a tear dripping down her face.
"Hey, hey," he leant down and kissed the tear away. "You couldn't have known what was going to happen. There was nothing you could have done… Nothing," he promised her, punctuating his last word with a kiss. As the song continued, Gabby continued to hum along thinking about the words that were floating around them. It still scared her to how close they could have come to losing everything.
As the song came to an end, Matt dipped her slightly for one more kiss.
"So when you finally left the house yesterday. I was looking for some paperwork for Molly's…" Gabby started as she walked back around to the cooker, insisting Matt take a seat at the breakfast bench.
"Gabby, you were supposed to be resting," Matt insisted.
Gabby held up a finger to hush him. Leaning around him, she pulled out an envelope from behind counter, "I found this… Matt?"
Matt had to tear his eyes away from the familiar scrawl that was his handwriting on the letter he had written to Smudge many weeks ago… One similar to the one that he wanted to again write to his child on his birthday now… One that he had desperately wanted to do after the week that he and Gabby had experienced. But one that he hadn't been able to write whilst she had still been in hospital. During that first night that she was in hospital, Matt had sat down in one of those uncomfortable chairs armed with a pen and paper, but he just wasn't able to make the words transfer from his brain onto the paper, the words had been much too muddled. Matt still felt his heart skip a beat every time he thought back to that fateful day.
*Flashback*
Casey came charging through the glass doors of Chicago Med, not bothering to see who or what was around him all the whilst with Boden hot on his heels. "Maggie?" Casey finally looked where he was going to find the charge nurse standing at her usual spot.
"Matt?"
"Where's Gabby?" he demanded as he skidded to a halt. He felt Boden's hand on his back in an attempt to calm him down. Obviously Boden had met up with Severide at the entrance.
"She's going to be okay Casey."
"Matt… She's fine. She's upstairs. On the second floor," Maggie tried to allay his fears the best she could. Casey nodded in thanks before noticing Brett hanging around the back of the desks.
"Brett!" he called out. "What happened? Is Gabby okay?" he stopped in front of her, his hands coming down onto her shoulders noticing that the blonde was shaking slightly.
"Casey," interrupted Doctor Choi's voice. "Come with me," he led Brett and Casey into an unoccupied treatment room. In there both Doctor Choi and Brett were able to fill Casey in what had happened, from what had happened from when Ambo had gone on their run to what had happened when they arrived at Med.
"Is CPD involved?" Casey questioned impatiently. Brett nodded her head.
"I'm sorry Casey. If I had known I would have made her drive…" Brett whimpered, every word seemingly a struggle to get out without breaking down. "I'm so sorry Casey." Through the fog of everything that was happening Casey knew that it wasn't the blonde's fault, from what he was being told there was nothing that anyone could have done. He simply waved her off, he knew he should reassure her more, but his mind was solely focused on Gabby.
"Can I see her?"
~D~
Matt stood in the doorway of the private room that Gabby had been set up in. He had been assured by both Doctor Choi and Doctor Manning on the ride up to the second floor that both Gabby and Smudge were okay. Natalie had run a number of tests and Gabby was responding well. She had woken up not long after they had brought her into Med. They hadn't performed an ultrasound yet, rather they were waiting for an OB/GYN for that. By they had used the heartbeat monitor to check in the short term.
When she couldn't get hold of Doctor Peterson on the spot, Natalie had made the decision to admit Gabby upstairs. And as he stood on the threshold, Matt noticed that Gabby had her head turned away from the door and was hooked up into a monitor - one that Matt wasn't familiar with. Kelly came up behind Matt, clapping him on the back.
"We're all out here when you're ready," Kelly told him. "You take all the time you need." Matt nodded in thanks as he looked in at Gabby once more time.
"Gabs?" he quietly called as he made his way over to her bed. Gabby turned to face her husband with Matt noticing immediately that there were many tear tracks running down her face. For Gabby once she saw him, her resolve and face crumbled, until now she had put on a strong facade. Everyone had assured her that it was okay, that she was okay and that Smudge was okay. But seeing Matt stood by the foot of her bed and she broke down.
"Hey, hey," Matt rushed over and leant over the bed railing to hug her. His back protested slightly, being sore from the drills that he had been running with his company. He pulled back slightly and untangled himself from her arms. This caused her to sob louder and harder. "It's okay…" he soothed. Pulling the bedclothes up higher, he kicked off his shoes and made himself as comfortable as he could on the bed. Guiding her head into his chest, he allowed her to cry herself out, whilst rubbing circles on her back and whispering sweet nothings in her ear.
"It's okay… You're okay," he whispered as her sobs subsided and breathing started to even out. Matt eased himself up as she shivered slightly. He pulled his lieutenant jacket off and offered it to her, which was gratefully accepted by Gabby to lay across her belly.
An older doctor walked into the room, tapping on the doorframe as he entered. Matt looked up at the interruption. He swung his legs off the bed and stood to meet the gentleman.
"Mr. and Mrs. Casey, I'm Doctor Holloway. I'm the obstetrician who is on call today," he introduced himself.
"Matt Casey," Matt offered his hand before scooping up his jacket to put back on.
"I've been brought up to speed by Doctor Manning," Doctor Holloway started. "How are you feeling Mrs. Casey?" noticing the jacket that Matt was pulling out of the way.
"Gabby is fine," she spoke up. "I'm fine… When can I go home?"
"Gabby," Matt hissed from his spot next to the bed. "You've had a fall, let the doctor speak."
"Mrs. Casey, falling during pregnancy is extremely common as your increasingly protruding abdomen, softening ligaments and joints, and changing centre of gravity can cause you to lose your balance," Doctor Holloway started.
"I didn't lose my balance… I was pushed," Gabby snapped. Matt reached over from his position and began to run a soothing hand through her hair.
"It's okay," he whispered in her ear.
"I'm sorry Mrs. Casey. My point is that a fall is actually common…"
"Where is my doctor? Did someone call her?" Gabby was still on edge and wanted a familiar face who she would trust implicitly.
"Gabby…" Matt started slowly. "Doctor Holloway is more than qualified… I'm sorry please continue," he turned back his attention back to the doctor.
"No, that's fine Lieutenant…"
"Please Matt," he interjected. Gabby gave a small smile to the doctor, encouraging him to go on as well as apologising at the same time.
"That's perfectly fine. I've got one of the nurses trying to chase down Doctor Peterson for you. Forgive me for misspeaking earlier, I meant no harm. Falling during pregnancy can make you panic. But your body is designed to protect your developing baby during pregnancy. Any injury would have to be severe enough to seriously hurt you before it would directly harm your baby. The walls of your uterus are thick, strong muscles that help keep your baby safe," Doctor Holloway advised the couple in front of himself.
Gabby gripped Matt's hand tighter, so tight that it had started to turn white, not that Matt had even noticed. Gabby opened her mouth to ask a question before being interrupted by a soft knock on the door before Doctor Peterson poked her head in the door. Gabby let out an involuntary sigh of relief. Doctor Holloway nodded in greeting to his colleague.
"Sorry Doctor Holloway, nothing against you," apologised Matt hearing the noise. The older gentleman held up a hand.
"None taken, I can understand that you'll be more comfortable with your own Doctor," he waved off. "Clara, how are you? I am sorry I haven't been much help to Lieutenant and Mrs. Casey. I was simply explaining that it's not too uncommon for a fall to occur. And sorry I wasn't able to find you sooner."
"I'm sorry. I was in delivery," apologised Clara stepping into the room fully and accepting the proffered iPad. "Thank you for taking good care of my patients. I'm sure they were safe in your capable hands Doctor Holloway." He smiled as he bid the room farewell.
"Ok Gabriela," Clara started as she flicked through the results of the tests that had been run, "What actually happened?"
"She was working, bring a patient in," Matt took over, needing to have some control over what was happening, it was the only way he knew how to cope. "He was high or something according to Brett. Her feet were taken out from underneath her and she hit the deck pretty hard." Gabby nodded along in confirmation, knowing that there was very little point in trying to interject over Matt. She knew that he was overprotection mode - and she didn't blame him.
Clara hmmed in concentration, "Everything is looking okay. Nothing glaring is sticking out to me…"
"And Smudge?" concern laced each of her words. Clara gave them both a strong confident smile as she moved over to the side of the bed with all of the monitors. Turning a knob, Smudge's heartbeat filled the room.
"That device strapped to you is a fetal heartbeat monitor and baby is going strong. They're a strong little kid. How is the movement in there?"
"Haven't noticed much…" Gabby admitted.
"Anything out of the normal? Are you feeling it less?"
"Is there something wrong?" Matt questioned he questioned as he turned to sit on the edge of the bed so he could face Gabby.
"Not necessarily. I would be concerned if there was a decrease in movement… Let's not stress about this Gabby. I'll get one of nurses to get the ultrasound machine and let's put any of those fears to rest," she patted Gabby's leg before disappearing in search of a machine.
"Baby," Matt breathed. He scooted up the bed so he was able to capture her lips wanting another sign to make sure everything was okay with Gabby.
"I'm okay," she promised. "Now that you're here and we're going to see Smudge… I'm okay.." Matt smiled as she pushed herself up in an attempt to kiss him. He finally took pity on her and leant down to meet her halfway.
There was a clearing of a throat followed by a laugh, "Don't you two ever come up for air?" Clara teased, smiling as Matt turned slightly red. "There's just another thing Gabby…" Clara mentioned as she started unpacking the machine. "Your notes mentioned that you hit the deck pretty hard and have a cut behind your ear…"
"That would explain all the blood," mused Matt…
"Hmm?" both Gabby and Clara turned towards him.
"Sylvie mentioned that there was a lot of blood pouring from your head. I was worried it was so much more…" he confessed. Turning towards Clara he continued, "Sylvie is Gabby's partner on Ambo. She's a bit shaken up. Actually the house is in the waiting room, will it be okay for them to come in soon?"
"Crowd's getting restless, huh?" Gabby joked. Matt nodded along knowingly. "The house is tight," she mentioned, "they will be out there until everyone knows that everything is okay with their little candidate," she explained resting a hand on her belly giving it a small rub.
"Should be fine… Look I want you to know this. Looking over your charts I don't think you've suffered a concussion, however I don't want to risk a CT scan to rule it out. I want to keep you in overnight just for observation."
"And what am I looking for?" Matt enquired.
"Matt," whined Gabby. "They pay nurses for that."
"I would be concerned if Gabby started experiencing nausea, vomiting, dizziness, sensitivities to light and sound, and confusion… It can take a few hours for it to manifest, which is why I want you to stay. Just in case, no matter how slim the chances."
"Before I start, just a couple of quick questions Gabby. Are you experiencing vaginal bleeding or leaking amniotic fluid?" A shake of Gabby's head allowed her to continue, "Are you feeling any severe pain or tenderness in your abdomen, uterus or pelvis? ...No? Good."
Quickly she drew up Gabby's shirt and noticed the beginning of some bruising on Gabby's left side. "Baby?" Matt quickly questioned, his eyes growing wide at the sight.
"Oh that's nothing much… It doesn't even hurt," she pushed her husband's concern off as her fingers brushed over the fast turning dark purple spot. She hadn't even noticed it herself.
"Gabriela, what happened there? There isn't any mention of this on your notes. I don't know how it was missed when they were putting the monitor on?"
"Honestly, I don't know. I don't remember hitting my stomach on anything. All I remember is putting my arms around my belly to protect Smudge…"
"Nothing hurts?" Clara prodded again.
"Nothing more than general aches that I've had for a while."
Matt closed his eyes momentarily and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I wonder if you caught the edge of the ledge in the back of the Ambo… There's a protruding ledge near the side door that she might have caught? You know the one just past the seat?"
"It's possible," Gabby confirmed. "But I don't remember it…"
"Let's have a look at what's going on in there," Clara started, "Bear in mind that now that I know that there's been trauma to our abdomen I might just up your stay to three days…" she kept speaking as she removed the heart monitor. Gabby sighed in relaxation having had the tight elastic finally removed.
"Complications?" Gabby asked worriedly.
"Ultrasound first," comforted Clara, "then we can reassess in 24 hours… Cold jelly coming up."
Matt always thought he would be better prepared for the sight of his child on the grainy ultrasound. Yet every single time his heart caught in his throat and he would feel the tears prick in his eyes.
~D~
The rest of the house was indeed restless and as soon as Clara had cleaned everything up and taken it away Gabby had demanded that everyone be let in. The rowdy bunch somehow had managed to fit into Gabby's small room with as little fuss as possible, well as little as Firehouse 51 could manage. Brett quickly made her way over to Gabby's bedside searching for a hug from her partner, her eyes still bloodshot from all of the tears. The latest images of Smudge were passed around and cooed over. Everyone had a laugh over Cruz turning it left and right, up and down trying to figure out if it was a boy or a girl.
"Give it a break," Otis teased, demanding that he pass on the photos. "You're never going to work it out!" Cruz frowned as he reluctantly handed over the images.
Brett was even able to calm down once she had seen for herself that Gabby was okay. Kidd unceremoniously dropped herself onto the end of the bed, with Severide coming up to massage her shoulders. Gabby gave Matt a brief half-smile, happy to see that her friends were seemingly working on their relationship.
Since they were technically still on shift, they didn't stay long. Boden enforced to both Matt and Gabby that they had as long as they needed. They would sort it out, Truck could go lean this shift and they had already taken Ambo out of service. Both were appreciative of what their chief had done for them. Herrmann just needed one last hug from Gabby to make sure his kid was okay.
Matt shook Boden's hand and allowed Severide to pull him in for a quick hug as they farewelled the house. "Anything else you need?" Severide questioned.
"Just my clothes and bag from my locker. And my truck would be nice." Severide smiled promising to be back after he finished the shift. Matt sighed as he quietly closed the door behind the lingering pair. Gabby turned to face him, finally free of all of the monitors, patted the empty space on the bed. Matt shook his head slightly, "Still in my uniform," he complained.
"I don't care; I just want to have you next to me. Plus, it didn't seem to bother you before." Matt gave a dry chuckle as he slipped into her bed flinging an arm around her shoulders bring her head close to his and pressing a kiss to her hair.
The couple sat in comfortable silence for a long time, Matt just comfortable with being able to hold her close. He couldn't quite imagine what he would have done if something had happened to them. Gabby laid her head against his chest feeling his heart racing. "Babe?" she twisted slightly to look up at him.
"I was so scared Baby. I didn't think I could breathe when Boden told us what had happened… Well, that something had happened to you."
Gabby paused for a beat, she knew that they had promised to keep working on their communication, but suddenly she felt like she needed to make a decision right now. "Matt? I know we have promised to talk about everything and we would make all of our decisions… But Baby…"
"Hey…" Matt hooked a finger under her chin forcing her to look up at him. Drinking in her face, his heart twisted slightly at her wide brown eyes that showed sadness and concern. "Gabriela? What is it?"
Sucking in a deep lungful of air, Gabby decided that the best possible course of action was to just say what she was thinking… "I don't want to go back to Ambo," she looked away as her fingers danced over her belly. "I can't Matt… I can't go back. I can't go through this again."
Matt internally gave a sigh of relief. This situation, everything that had happened today, had been the realisation of one of his worst nightmares. Whilst he would never presume to tell Gabby that he didn't want her out on the roads anymore, suddenly a weight had been lifted from his heart and his shoulders.
"Matt?" Gabby's voice broke through his thoughts. "Talk to me?"
Matt turned his body around so he was able to plant a long deep kiss on his wife. Gabby melted into the kiss, knowing that as much as they were working on communication Matt was still much more physical than talkative. "I love you," he mumbled against her lips before starting the kiss again.
Breaking the kiss, Gabby snuggled into his chest allowing him to play with the strands of her hair. "What is it that you really want to do?" Matt questioned. "Right in here," he tapped her heart, "What is it telling you to do?"
"Leave Ambo, for now. I was thinking that I would give the Chief Paramedic and Dean of Academy a call, or at least get Chief to call for me. I don't think they've found someone to take on that position yet. Last week I heard that there was a possibility of having a rotation basis for the job… But I'm making decisions for us again…"
"Gabby, this isn't you making decisions for us. This is you telling me what you feel comfortable with. This is going to be what works best for us… Will you be okay with a desk job?"
Gabby smiled up at him. "Is it going to be hard? I'm not sure if I'm ever going to be ready for this. But…" she looked down at her belly. "This is what is best for us… That is if me working for the academy is okay with you?" If Gabby was honest with herself, she just couldn't see herself back on the road anymore. Her confidence had been shaken and whilst she knew that this wasn't forever, the actual decision to take the Academy job hadn't been a hard one. Protecting Smudge and her family was foremost in her mind now.
"Anything you want Gabby…" Gabby smiled and took his hand to place over her belly. Sighing tiredly, she closed her eyes thinking what a long day it had been. Matt pulled her in closer to him, pressing another kiss to the crown of her head. Brushing aside her top he placed his warm hand flat over her belly causing her to moan contently as he began rubbing a thumb over her stomach. "Anything that keeps you and Smudge safe," he whispered to the sleeping form of his wife.
*End Flashback*
"Matt?" Gabby's voice pulled him out his daydream, waving the letter in his face a questioning look across her face.
"It's a letter," he confessed. "You remember the shift when I told Herrmann to stay back?" he watched as she nodded in confirmation. "No one knows what tomorrow holds, and I thought of Boden and how he made us all write letters to all of the important people in our lives and I wrote to Smudge - just in case something happened. I'm not saying that I think it will. But just in case… Or it might make a nice 18th birthday present. I was thinking that I would add to them…"
Tears sprung to Gabby's eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. Settling herself between his legs, she started to play with the short hairs on the back of his neck. Cursing her depleted lung capacity, Gabby soon found herself breaking off the kiss. Attempting to catch her breath, she leant her forehead against his, "I love you, you know that Matt?" she spoke gently.
Pulling back slightly more, she nodded towards the fridge. Matt gave her a confused look. Without words, she pulled out of his embrace and pointed towards a white object pinned to the fridge. Giving her a small smile, he walked towards it and found another envelope bearing his name.
"Similar minds… Happy birthday baby." Matt gave a slight chuckle, he couldn't believe Gabby would have done something like this. With a shake of his head, he tore the object open. "Hold it," Gabby ordered thrusting a glass of juice into his empty hand. "I'm going to make breakfast, you go enjoy your birthday present."
"You're supposed to be resting," Matt argued back, looking around the kitchen he spotted his birthday cake, he always looked forward to anytime that Gabby made a birthday cake. He really did want to tell her off for baking when Doctor Peterson had insisted that she still take it easy for a while longer, but he was looking forward to his cake. He stretched out a finger to swipe some of the frosting from the cake.
"Oi!" warned Gabby, flicking his hand. "That's for afterwards," she threw over her shoulder as she started over to the fridge rummaging around for some eggs and milk, quite simply ignoring him, "It's just a quick bacon and eggs for my husband's first birthday as a daddy." Matt couldn't help it, a smile that could light up downtown Chicago flashed across his face, it did every time he was referred to as Daddy. Knowing that there was no use arguing with her, he walked past her, pressing a kiss to the back of her head on his way out to their outside area. However he took one step outside in only a long sleeved t-shirt and decided that outside wasn't going to be a comfortable place for breakfast. Quickly he made his way inside and towards the dining room ignoring Gabby's laughter as he passed her.
Polishing off half of his orange juice, he placed the glass down before pulling out the letter. Who would have thought that Gabby would have thought to write him a letter on his birthday, especially since he could see that she hadn't opened the letter to Smudge.
Dear Matt,
I know it's been a hard week. Never in my wildest dream would have I thought that this would be how we would be celebrating your birthday this year. Not with everything that happened this week. If anyone had told me that I would have given up my spot on Ambo just half way through my pregnancy I would have laughed. But baby after everything that happened this week I can't do it anymore. I can't keep putting Smudge in that danger and I'm sorry that I didn't listen to you earlier.
Thank you, this time last year - we were in a completely different place in our lives. I never thought that we would have bought a huge house, gotten married and expecting a baby. But I love our little life - the one that we have made together. The one that we'll welcome Smudge into in only a few short months. Over this past year, thank you...
Thank you for believing in us
Thank you for helping me through those dark days after Louie left
Thank you for asking me to marry you
Thank you for understanding why I couldn't face coming back onto Truck
Thank you for finding a way to make our relationship work - for communicating here at home and at 51
Thank you for giving me your name
Thank you for letting me take all of those random shifts on another watch so I could keep my hand in the game
Thank you for sharing your bunk in your quarters when I've needed them
Thank you for making me feel like the most important girl in the world
Thank you for sharing in this crazy exciting time in our lives
Thank you for letting me share the news in my own time
Thank you for letting me be the one to make the decision to leave Ambo and helping me understand that it was all going to be okay
Thank you for not freaking out when I had the accident last week, or at least holding it together in front of me
Thank you for never questioning me about Smudge, even when I think that I can't do it anymore
Thank you for being 'enough' until I was ready
Thank you for understand and not being jealous of all the attention that everyone is giving me
Thank you for wrapping your arms around me, holding me close any time I've needed to cry
Thank you for being the lieutenant at work, doing everything that you can to make sure that you come home to us every shift
Thank you for your comfy quilted CFD jacket… and every article of clothing that I've stolen over the past 20 weeks. They are all mine now
Thank you for not taking offence when I've told you to get away from me
Thank you for being excited every time we've been able to see Smudge
Thank you for always having food in your quarters
Thank you for switching which side of the bed we sleep on just so I could be closer to the restroom
Thank you for taking me to see April and Natalie even though I have protested each time
Thank you for being the best Truck lieutenant, never underestimate how much you have taught me
Thank you for making sure that you keep trying to communicate with me. I know that we're so much better than we were five years ago
Thank you for letting me work this crazy job, both on Truck and Ambo, you never question me or my abilities. You just stand on the sidelines and cheer me on
Thank you for being a extraordinary father
Thank you for being a phenomenal husband
Thank you for being there
Thank you for making every new phase of our lives together the happiest one yet
Matt I know you're going to be a great father because you're already a great husband. I know my parents couldn't have wanted anyone to join our family because there isn't anyone better than you. And I know this because there is no one out there who could ever compare to you.
Happy birthday my Matthew
Gabby watched from the doorway as she watched a mired of emotions pass over Matt's face. Silently she wiped away the tears that had formed in her eyes as she saw Matt's eyes light up. She had struggled for a few weeks over what she was going to get Matt for his birthday. She had wanted something special for Matt's last birthday before they became a family of three, and she wanted it to be something just for Matt, not about Smudge or her – just him alone. And there was nothing that she could find, rather she had simply poured her heart out a few weeks ago.
Sliding a plate in front of him, she pressed a kiss to the side of Matt's cheek. "Happy Birthday baby."
Matt grinned as he noticed his wife's presence. Sliding an arm around her waist he gently pulled her down into his lap. "You, baby, are amazing. This was a wonderful present."
"I was thinking," Gabby started as she picked up a fork to pass food over to Matt. "I was thinking that maybe we could keep writing those letters to Smudge. You're right it would make a good present for an 18th birthday…"
"It would," Matt mused. "But how does resting upstairs right now sound?"
"I'm not tired Matt. I don't need rest."
"But you could show the birthday boy how much you love him."
Gabby giggled as she ran her fingers through his hair. Running a finger down his cheek, she captured his lips with her. "I guess I could do that," she whispered.
~ Her lungs are developing rapidly, and they will begin making a protein called surfactant ~
Thankfully I didn't listen to my husband whose version of this chapter was – "Nothing happened during week 22 due to Gabby being in an induced coma…We will be back next week with an update on Week 23..." I even sent that chapter to Rebecca for her to beta for me :)
Hope you enjoyed it