Chapter 21
Late Nights of War

The first time I was out on field with Francis Lancaster, it was surprisingly uneventful. The twenty-six year-old reporter followed his orders, only taking us to another Death Eater raid in the middle of London once the it was cleared by the aurors.

Wilma, it turns out, was quite a sweet middle-aged woman. She was soft-spoken and often only used her voice to respond to Lancaster's instructions. But I felt her constant presence close to me in an obvious effort to ensure I would have protection in case anything dangerous turned up.

I was grateful to have her by my side as Lancaster expectedly moved at a rapid pace between civilian interviews, auror reports, and barking instructions towards areas that he needed Wilma to photograph. He didn't waste time with small talk and I was terrified to ask questions the first time he instructed me to interview a civilian witness.

Thankfully, the few days of training I had gone through with him was quite useful – even if most of my tasks as an intern was to conduct the witness interviews and away from any potential action on the scene. I was given a list of questions and advice on how to approach shaken civilians, so it was manageable enough while Lancaster and Wilma did the dirty work with the aurors in the heart of the incident.

As the number of field incidents increased, I found less time at home and more time at the office. The issue with field work, as I began to realize, was how unpredictable the schedule could be. Lancaster never seemed to leave the office at all.

I fell into the habit of working later into the night day after day, proofreading the neverending stack of articles from the breaking news division while waiting on standby with my new team of field reporters.

Eventually, I had even surpassed Wilma, who up to that point stayed true to her orders from the chief editor and stayed by Lancaster's side so long as he was working. One day, she seemed to have enough and left the office near two in the morning to get some sleep on an actual bed.

My heavy eyes followed her sluggish form as she exited the room, wondering if I should take an early night too after a week of clocking out at three in the morning and coming back in at nine.

Two days ago, I had even made the mistake of falling asleep on my desk, only to be rudely woken up by Emily the morning after. It wasn't an experience I wanted repeated, but I was close to succumbing to another night in my cubicle until a familiar voice called my name.

"Dyer."

I snapped out of my daze from staring blankly at the closed door Wilma had just exited through. My senses heightened at Lancaster's voice, assuming an incident had just occurred and we were set to apparate.

"Hey, relax," Lancaster chuckled, eyeing me with amusement as I froze in the middle of gathering my stuff.

"What?" I said groggily in my confusion, not entirely sure if it was appropriate to talk to him so casually now that he was supervising me.

But I gave myself a pass. I was running on three hours of sleep.

"I was just checking if you were still alive," Lancaster said with a boyish smirk. His blue eyes still glinted with life behind his glasses, despite the dark circles around them.

"Probably not enough to apparate on my own, so I think I'll have to do side-along to wherever were headed," I said honestly, surprised I was able to string a coherent sentence with the state of my sleep-deprived brain.

"Lucky for you, we're not going anywhere," he said with a relieved sigh.

He pushed himself up with his palms to sit on my desk and it was a bit awkward to look up at his height from my seat, considering how tall he actually was. I straightened my back reflexively.

"We're not?" I asked, surprised. He usually only approached me at this time of night if we had to apparate somewhere.

He shook his head to confirm and my body slouched over in relief, quite sure I wouldn't have been able to interview any civilian properly anyway if we had to rush to an incident.

"Why do you stay in the office so late?" Lancaster asked, smile still intact but the jerk of his eyebrow indicated his genuine curiosity.

"What…" I began, hesitating with my response as I tried to comprehend the question. "What do you mean?"

"You." He pointed his index finger at me. "Staying late. All the time. Am I speaking English or has your lack of sleep finally caught up to you?"

There wasn't any malice in his tone – only the same playful manner he exuded consistently with anyone he talked to in the office.

"I–I stay because you stay!" I exclaimed with a pathetic stutter.

"You're an intern, Dyer," Lancaster said. "When the chief told you to work with me, she didn't mean until…" He checked his watch. "1:53 in the morning."

"I can't just go home if you're headed to an incident in the middle of the night," I said with a frown.

"Actually, yes, you can," Lancaster said smartly, raising his finger at me once more. "Again – Intern. You. Any of what I'm saying actually make sense to you right now?"

My eye twitched in annoyance at the constant berating of my current state of mind.

"Regardless, I don't want to miss anything," I said. "What if you've got a really important story to report on? Like the Death Eaters... break into Gringotts or something? Or Voldemort makes a surprise appearance in the middle of Diagon Alley?"

"First of all, if Voldemort ever makes a surprise appearance anywhere, you're not getting an inch in that scene."

"What – Why not?" I snapped.

Lancaster raised his finger for the third time that night, and I felt the irritation before he could even say the word I already expected.

"Intern," he said simply, pointing directly at me. "Seriously, Dyer. Keep up. Or better yet, get some bloody sleep. Merlin knows you won't be useful on the field with half a brain."

"I'm fine," I said stubbornly, despite my head telling me that I very well was not. I couldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing I couldn't handle a few days of working later than expected. This was the life of a field reporter, and I promised myself I could do it.

Lancaster observed me in silence for a few seconds and I could have sworn the expression on his face softened. I kept his gaze in another useless attempt to challenge him.

Finally, he sighed and turned away. The overwhelming pride I felt at winning at a bloody staring contest was concerning. I really did need some sleep.

"You've got determination, Dyer. I'll give you that," he said with a soft chuckle. "But field reporters need rest too. You're going to miss a story or two whether you like it or not."

"You don't miss any," I replied easily.

"Because I'm me." Lancaster smirked. "And I've got an addiction to stimulant potions that thoroughly fucked my sleep schedule."

I jolted in surprise. "Addiction?"

"Don't worry, the chief knows," Lancaster assured her, casual as ever. "I'm more surprised you haven't heard. The gits in the office never fail to gossip about it."

"Stimulant potions?" I clarified, and I was starting to get the idea that he was actually getting impatient with my inability to keep up with this conversation. Francis Lancaster waited for no one after all.

"I said that, didn't I?" he said rather snippily. "Kept it secret early on 'til the chief found me passed out in the lavatory after taking four vials in one night."

"You're kidding," I breathed, jaw-dropped.

"Wish I were," Lancaster snorted. "I never did have the best track record with sleep. The potions kept me up and active the entire day. Imagine that?"

"But you stopped," I said. "After you were caught."

"Almost took my life, 'course I had to," he said solemnly. "Snuck in a few vials here and there but I've been clean almost a year now. The chief saw through that I'd recover."

I pursed my lips, feeling awfully awkward to talk about something so personal with him. It did make sense – the reporter was always so impulsive and never seemed to rest.

"That's why you shouldn't try to keep up with me, kid," Lancaster said, stretching a palm to ruffle the top of my head. "Gotta take care of yourself and all that. The news ain't going anywhere."

"I just thought field reporters always had to deal with these insane hours," I mumbled bashfully.

"I admire your dedication," he said with a cheeky grin, resting his hand back on his knee. "But no. Field reporters do shifts usually. I just got longer ones."

A burning question jumped up my throat and I couldn't help but voice it out before he could push me out the door to get some sleep.

"Why do you do it?" I asked. "You're always risking your life for your job. The potions, going to areas without clearance…"

Lancaster laughed heartily. "Thought it was obvious, Dyer? I love what I do. I ain't got a lying bone in my body when I say the people deserve to know what's really waiting for them out there. And if it gives them a chance to survive in this godforsaken war, then I'm willing to do whatever it takes."

"That sounds familiar," I chuckled, thinking of a certain group of seventh years risking their lives before they even graduated Hogwarts.

"Gryffindor thing, I suppose?" Lancaster said fondly. "My addiction picked up when the war began, you know? The number of shady reports and cover ups to keep people calm was outrageous. Couldn't just sit there and do nothing when I knew what was out there."

I nodded in understanding, feeling thoroughly exposed that his simple statement could hit me harder than expected.

"I feel similar right now," I said in a small voice, leaning forward to avoid his eye. "I want to be able to do my part in this war."

"You're doing a lot more than you think, Dyer." Lancaster bumped my cheek with his palm, making me jerk up to meet his eye again.

He sluggishly hopped down from the table and faced me again.

"You're in the office at two in the morning and you think you aren't doing enough?" He snorted. "You're out here on your arse making sure we're delivering the news we're supposed to. Give yourself some more credit, Dyer."

"I'll be going back to school for my seventh year next month though," I said dejectedly.

"You're not in school right now, are ya?" Lancaster shot her a wink then proceeded to exit the cubicle. I stared at his back open-mouthed and watched him pause by the opening. He turned back with his signature cheeky grin and said, "Still got a month left. Get some sleep and make the most out of it."

The talk with Lancaster rejuvenated something in my spirit and effectively improved my sleep schedule in the following days. He started becoming more comfortable letting me go off alone with my tasks too, which was admittedly a great boost in confidence. Things were going in stride and our team of three was as smooth together as we could be.

After one particularly long day outside covering a typical but still undeniably dreadful case of an innocent muggle family murdered in Liverpool, I was more than ready to head home and treat myself to a dreamless sleep potion. Lancaster allowed Wilma and I to head home and while he attended a meeting with the aurors on the crime scene on his own.

Tired but looking forward to seeing my parents early that day, I was unfortunately greeted by an empty house as soon as I apparated into my living room. I caught sight of a ripped piece of paper by the door immediately, taped with a note addressed to me.

Monnie, your mum and I are at the Lion's Head. There are some leftovers in the fridge. Eat well! - Dad

My lip curled in disappointment, slightly disturbed that they were able to spend the night outside like there wasn't a war against their own kind. Even if my dad was informed, he would never fully understand the seriousness of it all. He was a muggle after all.

I sighed in resignation, convinced that my mother was capable enough to apparate them both home should the situation turn south. They might as well have their fun, and I was even a bit envious. Knowing Gasser, the pub's resident bartender, he was probably giving them a good time.

I had to admit I missed the feeling of freedom – watching public football matches and hanging out at the pub with my dad during the summer. Even the trip to Diagon Alley with my mum last winter was making me feel nostalgic.

Starting to feel rather suffocated, I ripped the note off the wall and stuffed it in the pocket of my jeans. Swinging the front door open, I stomped outside into the front garden and the door closed shut behind me. The small click almost resounded like a echo in the utterly silent street of our suburb.

I briefly considered apparating to Lacey's place, but her parents wouldn't be too happy to have visitors. Considering they were worrying about Benjy on a daily basis, it wouldn't be a good idea to cause their family any more trouble.

I hesitated on the next person I had in mind. I checked my watch and it was a quarter to six in the evening. The Ministry office hours must have been over by now. It wouldn't hurt to check if the auror couple was free to hang out for a bit, so I decided to check for the sake of the slim chance.

James had offered to let me visit after work anyway.

In a second, I felt myself twist on the spot with my wand in hand, hurriedly making the decision before I changed my mind. I felt the air rush back in my lungs as my feet landed on the sidewalk in front of James and Lily's house in Godric's Hollow.

Slowly walking through the picket fence, I got a closer look at the familiar windows. The sun had set and there was no light gleaming through the curtains. I glanced at the second floor but the blinds were closed.

I felt foolish to assume they would be free to entertain visits, especially considering the incident that happened today with the murders. They could've gotten held up at the Ministry or they were home but using the evening to rest after a long day – just like I intended to.

Deviating from the plan, I swiftly turned back around to disapparate from the sidewalk but immediately stopped dead in my tracks. Clad in black traveling robes and a tragic bedhead was Sirius, standing on the same spot I arrived at earlier and staring back at me with just as much surprise in his wide gray eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Sirius asked with a hint of aggression.

My head jerked back, startled by his cool welcome.

"I could ask you the same thing," I replied snippily.

Sirius' guarded facade didn't falter. His hand twitched towards the inside of his robes, as if he was prepared to reach for his wand. He spoke again before I could question him, voice hard as stone.

"Monica, remind me why you were angry with me after the last Gryffindor Quidditch match."

My thoughts faltered and my jaw dropped. Unexpected panic flooded through me as I tried to make sense of what he was getting at.

He didn't look the slightest ashamed as he stiffly probed, "Answer the question."

I released a flustered chuckle. "What are you… I wasn't angry with you."

The memories weren't entirely clear in my head with the way he was demanding an answer like an interrogation. My mind only cleared up and caught onto his intention when his hand plunged into his robes. I blurted out a better explanation for the sake of my own life.

"I mean, I was! I was!" I cried, eyes locked onto his hand that froze before he could pull out his wand. "You–You kept telling me not to fancy you! I was upset because you told me you couldn't forget about what happened in Hogsmeade!"

I cursed myself repeatedly in my head, feeling like an utter idiot. Of course, he was checking if I was the real Monica. It was a regular greeting nowadays that I couldn't believe I misunderstood just because I was too surprised to see Sirius.

Absolutely pathetic.

I didn't realize my hands had covered my face in panic and my eyes were locked shut after my embarrassing blunder at a simple precautionary question. Not until I heard a tired sigh from the boy in front of me did I lower my arms, hesitantly taking a peek.

Sirius was staring at me, tight-lipped and unamused. But his shoulders had relaxed and both arms hung loose by his sides, so my answer must have been satisfactory.

"You're terrible at this," he nagged as soon as we locked eyes.

I consciously dropped my arms fully to spare at least some part of my dignity and took deep breaths to calm my rapidly beating heart.

Lips in a thin line, I turned away from his judgmental stare and muttered, "You scared me."

"It's protocol, Mon," Sirius said pointedly with a hint of impatience. "You couldn't have just answered the question like any normal person would, eh? You answered it wrong too! I was about to blast you to next week!"

Heat flooded my cheeks and I crossed my arms defiantly. I was tempted to retort a suggestion to ask questions that veered away from the topic of the most embarrassing moment of my life, but I wasn't keen to start a row in another person's residence.

"Sorry," I mumbled, still avoiding his pointed glare.

He heaved another sigh and raked his fingers through his hair. It had grown a bit since I last saw him, dark strands curling just by the tips of his ears.

At first glance, I didn't recognize anything different in his features, but the longer I studied him, I took note of the thin layer of sweat on his forehead, the bags under his eyes, and the lackluster color of his pupils that used to be so full of life.

Had he already looked like this during the housewarming? I must have been too caught up in catching up with everyone to really notice.

"Oi."

I met his eyes in alarm. He looked a bit more amused this time around.

"Got something to say or would you like to stare at me like a goldfish for the rest of the night?"

"Bugger off," I replied dryly. "I was just wondering if you already looked this exhausted when I saw you at James' last time."

Sirius tilted his head in thought.

"I wouldn't know," he said. "Can't recall the last time I've looked at a mirror to be honest."

"Doesn't surprise me, that," I said, glancing at his disheveled hair.

"So," Sirius began, taking a step closer and placing a palm on my head. "To what does Prongs' empty house owe the pleasure?"

I irately pushed his heavy palm away and cast him a questioning look.

"I just wanted to visit. How d'you know they're not home?"

"Obvious, innit?" he said, shoving both hands in his trousers and staring up at the house behind me. "Lights aren't on. At this time, they should already be waiting for me to arrive downstairs."

"Regular guest, are you?"

Sirius smirked down at me. "Well, Prongs practically begs me to visit every day."

I rolled my eyes. "Somehow I'm inclined to believe that."

"Because it's true," Sirius sang, dipping his head back and shifting his stance back towards the pavement.

He took a step forward and I had half the mind to grab his arm to keep him from leaving, but he spoke up again before I could decide.

"Come on, let's get out of here before the muggle neighbors think we're breaking and entering," he said, waving his hand to beckon me to follow.

I blinked in surprise, feet frozen on the grass as he walked further away.

"Oi," he said, pausing in place and turning his head around.

I snapped out of my brief stupor.

"Coming or what?"

"Oh… Er, sure." I waddled my way towards him in uncoordinated steps and stood next to him. "Where are we going?"

Sirius hummed, tilting his head in thought. "I don't know. Any ideas?"

"A walk would be nice," I admitted, feeling rather restless now that he was with me.

"Boring choice," he said with a slight smirk.

He whipped his wand out regardless and tapped his own shoulder with a swift wave. The traveling coat he wore transfigured into a simple black collared jacket and before I could ask why, he grabbed my hand and we apparated into the night.

My feet felt solid ground a second later and I gripped Sirius' hand tightly as I found my balance. I could see him calm under the flickering yellow light above him, and only then did I take a look at my surroundings.

We apparated in an open grass space with wooden benches littered around a still pond. I could spot a small playground at the far end – empty under the arriving night while a few muggles strolled in pairs through the winding walkways.

"Just what I needed," I said, flexing my fingers as soon as I released Sirius' hand. "A nice generic park."

"You asked for a walk," Sirius said pointedly, stuffing his hand in the pockets of his trousers and striding away without waiting for a response.

I paused in surprise at his sudden movement then hastily followed after him.

"Any particular reason why here?" I asked as I fell into step next to him.

Sirius glanced down at me from the corner of his eye.

"The walkways are wide."

"Because the walkways are wide?" I asked in bemusement.

Sirius nodded easily. "Much easier to enjoy a walk undisturbed by people approaching the opposite way, innit?"

I shook my head, amused by his strange reasoning.

"I wasn't aware you had such intensive considerations for an evening stroll."

Sirius laughed, breathy and carefree. It made me smile; I wasn't sure how long it had been since I'd seen him laugh so freely – a glaring reminder of just how little I'd seen of him lately.

"It's a ten minute walk away from my flat," Sirius spoke again. "I come here when I want to clear my mind off things."

For a second I was surprised, but it made sense. He must have moved out of James' place when he moved in with Lily.

"You live alone then?" I asked.

"Remus and Peter come over sometimes," he replied. "When we've got late night duties with the Order, they sleep over."

"That's good," I genuinely remarked. "The war's depressing enough as it is. It's not particularly fun paired up with loneliness."

Sirius cast a strange look in my direction, eyebrows furrowed and lips pursed. Clueless, I scrunched my own eyebrows back in response.

"What?" I asked, sounding much too defensive than I intended.

He was silent for a few seconds, holding my confused gaze until he questioned, "Why did you go to James' place today?"

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

"I already told you. I just wanted to visit."

"It's been a while since his housewarming," he said, tone low. "Why did you decide to come today?"

I turned away from the probing look in his gray eyes that looked ultimately more piercing in the moonlight.

"I don't know," I began, despite knowing the answer wouldn't satisfy him.

"Don't give me that," he said snippily.

Heaving a heavy sigh, I turned my head back towards him, only to find he was still drilling holes into my skull.

"Will you stop the interrogation mode for a second?" I said, chuckling nervously and hoping he would take the bait.

I wasn't sure what was keeping me from explaining further, but it didn't feel comfortable talking about coming home to an empty house when Sirius risked his own life with his friends on a daily basis. All my own problems just seemed trivial in the end.

Thankfully, he backed down with a tired sigh. Though I was fairly sure he wasn't done with the topic just yet.

"How's the Daily Prophet been then?" he asked with equal fervor. He nudged my shoulder with his, a knowing grin on his face. "Heard from James you've been doing well. His team debriefs with Lancaster and he always mentions you."

I swelled with pride at the statement, unaware that Lancaster ever mentioned me to the people he worked with. I couldn't help but return Sirius' grin.

"I think I'm alright," I said. "I used to think I had to stay in the office as long as Lancaster was still there, but he had to force me to leave one day."

"Damn, Mon, already working overtime," Sirius said jokingly, ruffling my hair with his palm. "Starting to wonder if you'd been lying about your career aspirations all along. Always secretly wanted to be a journalist, eh?"

"Yeah, along with my dreams to tag along with the most reckless reporter on earth," I replied dryly.

"You seem to get along pretty well if he's bragging about you to the aurors."

"Then I guess you could say it was a good match in the end," I said with a shrug.

I almost mentioned the distressing fact about his addiction, but decided against it. It was surprising Sirius seemed to be in a good mood altogether talking about the internship with Lancaster, considering his criticism the last time we spoke. Mentioning it seemed inappropriate in the calm atmosphere and out of bounds even if Lancaster spoke of it so casually.

"You're considering it then after Hogwarts?"

I perked up at the question, momentarily at a loss as I considered the truthful answer. We turned a corner as the walkway we followed led to an empty clearing by the pond. Sirius continued to speak his mind while I remained silent.

"What you're doing is pretty incredible, Mon," he said, walking towards the wrought-iron railings and leaning forward to look over the pond. "You're doing a huge service for the war by helping Lancaster out."

I couldn't keep my snort in as I followed his lead towards the bannister and resting my elbows next to his. The water was glittering under the moonlight, but the sullen feeling in the pit of my stomach didn't match the aura of the scenery.

"Don't tell me you don't agree?" Sirius said with narrowed eyes.

"I guess I do, I don't know," I muttered, keeping my gaze fixed on the water. "Lancaster said something similar a few days ago."

"An answer like that, I don't think you believe either of us."

"I do," I said forcefully. "It feels amazing to help Lancaster and I enjoy being out there."

"So are you considering it as a career after Hogwarts?"

"I don't know yet."

Sirius scoffed. "Bullshit. What's holding you back from considering it?"

I hesitated again, hating just how easy it was for him to ask questions that rendered me speechless. Truthfully I wasn't sure what was holding me back. I was having fun and it felt satisfying to do something with Lancaster with the same goal of delivering the most accurate stories on the war.

So I did what I excelled at – avoiding the question.

"Why are you so insistent about this all of a sudden?" I snapped. "You had a pretty harsh reaction over my decision to continue with this last time."

For a second I was satisfied that I managed to render him speechless for a few seconds, but it was quickly overwhelmed with guilt. I wanted to answer him, but perhaps I was too scared to face the gnawing truth that only seemed to make itself obvious in the most inconvenient of times. Coincidentally, that happened to be whenever Sirius was around to grill me on things people didn't normally do.

Like karma decided it was the perfect time to make me suffer, Sirius uttered his next words that hit the bullseye on my flurry of thoughts.

"You still want to join the Order."

With a sharp inhale, I gripped the railings tight.

"So what if I do?" I asked with a burst of confidence. "James and Lily have jobs and they're still in the Order, aren't they? It's not exactly a groundbreaking ambition to have these days."

"But you're not even considering staying at the Daily Prophet after Hogwarts."

"I said I don't know yet," I said with a hard tone. "If they'll have me, then maybe I will continue with the Daily Prophet. There's still a year for me to decide, Sirius. Why are you so up my arse about my future like I'm about to die tomorrow?"

If I had been guilty for rendering him speechless a minute ago, I felt downright mortified as soon as I saw the expression on his face at my words. Backtracking immediately, I gripped his arm and hastened an apology that was ready on my tongue.

"I–I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry."

Stupid, stupid, stupid. Their entire group of friends was moving along much too quickly in life because of the uncertainty of war and here I was blurting out hypothetical death sentences like it was nothing.

Sirius' eyes were sad, but they didn't look angry at me. I held onto him like a lifeline, a million questions in my head but unable to voice out any of them.

"I was happy for you, you know," Sirius finally spoke again, probably recognizing the question in my eyes. "When James told me about how Lancaster talked about you. It was brilliant and you lit up earlier talking about it. I was a git last time, telling you off. I just… want you to do something that makes you happy, you know? The war doesn't exactly give those opportunities on a silver platter."

In an embarrassing fit of bashfulness, I dropped my hand that gripped his arm and dipped my head down.

"Why do you always get so shy about these things?" Sirius asked, chuckling freely. "You like journalism, Mon. Nothing embarrassing about it."

"I'm not embarrassed," I said with much less confidence this time around. "I just… I want to do better. To consider working for the Daily Prophet after Hogwarts, they'd have to consider me first."

"Are you kidding?" Sirius laughed, tipping his head back as he shifted his position to lean his back against the bannister. "I looked up Francis Lancaster. Monica, if you can keep up with a guy like him in field journalism, you're more than set to have the balls to continue after graduating while working for the Order at the same time."

I eyed him with a tinge of doubt. "You really think so?"

"Bloody hell," Sirius cursed impatiently. He returned my gaze with raised eyebrows. "The only thing keeping you from doing all these things is yourself. You don't think you can do it."

"For good reason," I argued. "I'm not exactly the most assertive of people. It's not totally surprising for me to find it hard to pull it off."

Sirius snorted. "Funny, because hundred-percent I think you could and you will. I think you're more brave, assertive, and driven than you think you are and it pisses me off that you don't believe that."

I blinked, unsure what to make of the outburst despite the clear compliment. He didn't sound very soothing as he said it either.

"I'm not gonna go naming the endless list of times you've stood up to people or made your own decisions to make a name of yourself, 'cause frankly you should know all that by now."

Feeling a smile tug on my lips, I rested my chin on my arm with a newfound appreciation of the glittering view of the pond in front of me.

"Why'd you stop?" I asked humorously, peeking at him from the corner of my eye. "I'm quite interested in hearing this endless list of times you're referring to."

"As far as a confidence boost goes, that's all you're getting from me," Sirius replied with amusement.

"An effective pep talk, I'd admit."

He smirked. "An essential skill in my line of work."

Another wave of silence came, but broken by Sirius this time.

"Oh, and by the way, I know you were lonely today. Because of what – I don't know, but..."

He trailed off as I sighed, not even surprised anymore that he had deduced that from the earlier interrogation. It was just like him too to suddenly bring it up again.

I was ready to respond with a snarky remark, not all that uncomfortable to admit it anymore after the gruelling discussion about my future, but my thoughts were distracted by the sound of scribbling. With a jolt, I turned to face him, only to see Sirius with a quill and parchment he must have conjured.

"What are you–"

He finished his scribbling before I could complete the question and shoved the parchment under my nose.

"My address," he said, head facing the pond with a deadpan expression that seemed rather forced. "If you want company, you can come over anytime."

With stiff hands, I received the parchment but exclaimed, "I can't just come over unannounced!"

"But you can at James'?" he snapped childishly, snapping his head towards me and crossing his arms.

"That was just a one off thing!" I said in defense. "You're too busy to accommodate random visits–"

"They're not random if it's you," Sirius said with an impatient wave of his palm. "I'm usually free at nights so you can see me after work if you like."

I felt a wave of affection at the gesture, wondering if he had been considering this since he saw me at James'. We hadn't been keeping in touch very well via owl and I always understood why. There was also the unspoken understanding about him seeing his best friends during his free time because they must have used the time to catch up on Order business too.

But I couldn't deny the warmth I felt over the simple proposition, happy to be reminded that he valued me as a friend just as much.

"On one condition," I said, feeling a bit stupid with what I was about to say but it was for the sake of my own mental well-being.

"Alright, let's hear it," Sirius said with a soft frown.

"Try to brainstorm on new precautionary questions to test if I'm the real Monica Dyer, eh?"

He bit his lower lip, jaw stiff and eyes crinkling as he held a potential fit of laughter. I stared back, completely unamused by how funny he thought the request to be.

"S-Sorry," he said between repressed giggles, dipping his head down in another failed effort to hide his glee. "I just thought of one on the spot."

"You've known me for nearly a year and that had to be the first thing in mind?" I growled, slapping his arm in frustration. "You nearly killed me too!"

"Anyone else would have known what I was doing!" Sirius cried, twisting his torso to avoid the blow of my hand. "Ow! Alright, Mon, I'll keep the questions clean, Merlin!"

"You swear?" I said, menacingly pointing a finger with narrowed eyes.

Sirius pursed his lips and averted his eyes, clearly not making it easy for me to demand the favor from him. With a burst of shallow irritation, I raised the parchment with his address in my other hand.

"You know, I think James' company would be a lot more tolerable after work, now that I think of it," I snapped without any real malice.

"Oh, really?" Sirius challenged, then suddenly snatched the parchment from my loose grip. "Ya sure about that? I can throw this in the pond, if that's how you feel."

Left eye twitching, I stood my ground and huffed, far too stubborn to snatch it back. Truthfully I'd already read the address on the parchment anyway, but it wasn't the time to reveal that fact when he was so adamant to tease me.

When Sirius' taunts were met by my silence, he genuinely looked impressed. There was something different in his expression that kept my gaze as he waited for a response.

Then he exhaled a deep chuckle, a genuine smile on his face with the same emotion in his eyes. Averting his eyes away, his free hand raked through his hair as he looked over the pond.

He opened his mouth once then closed it soon after. His eyebrows furrowed together then he repeated the same hesitant action.

"What is it?" I asked, too curious to hold my tongue. A hesitant Sirius wasn't something I encountered very often after all.

It was even more surprising when he immediately replied, "Nothing," in a swift, almost uncaring tone.

In one smooth movement, he took my hand, placed the parchment with his address in my palm, and closed my fingers around it. A bit dazed by the gentle action, I barely noticed him spin me around and push me to walk forward with him, following the bannister down the walkway.

"Come on, I'll take you home," he said, pulling out his wand. "Your parents are probably worried."

I chuckled and offhandedly replied, "They're getting pissed at the pub as we speak, actually."

"Talk about living their best lives," Sirius muttered with clear envy.

We walked to the end of the path, reaching the edge of the pond in the park, and exchanging banter on my parents' carefree social lives in the midst of a war we both actively took part in. It was the most relaxed I had been in days, and I realized just how much I missed Sirius' easy presence in my daily life.

The selfish part of me wanted to take advantage of the little free time we had just to have moments like this, but I couldn't help the pessimism sink in my stomach at what exactly we had ahead of us.

But despite all odds, I managed to get through my first month of summer with more experience and clarity on my life than ever, so indulging myself in the last moments with Sirius before returning to Hogwarts was at least something I decided I deserved.

Fairly quick update for my super amazing readers. :) I'm so happy to see you guys stick around and thank you to those who just came as well!

I'm hoping to update at least once a week, but no promises since my work takes up most of my time these days. Again, I have the next few chapters drafter but I edit and add a lot of things whenever I look over them again.

Hope you can leave me your thoughts; all your feedback is super helpful!

- Finner