A/N: 'Tis the new year and a new chapter!
Katniss's POV
We take the alternative, longer route home so we can observe how the electrical building is guarded. Peeta and I wander along the fence which encloses the train tracks, keeping a far enough distance so we don't accidentally stumble into it and electrocute ourselves. I realize the only way we can reach the electrical building is if we hop the tracks near the station where the fence doesn't cover.
I come to the conclusion that this will have to happen at night. Someone will risk themselves getting shot by a watchful peacekeeper if they aren't careful enough. Not to mention, once someone bribes their way inside, how will they turn off the power? The necessary steps to complete this increasingly dangerous plan are becoming overwhelming. I swallow.
"We are going to need to study how the system works to turn it off... can you think of anyone who would know about it?" I whisper to Peeta. He shakes his head.
"Maybe somebody from the Seam? They usually repair most facilities in Twelve," he suggests.
"Yeah, and for once they make good money, too..." I think aloud.
"Katniss..." Peeta begins. He brushes away my hair and leans over to whisper in my ear.
"Wouldn't it be easier to secretly damage a part of the fence? Then someone will have to repair it, therefore temporarily shutting off the electricity," he explains. I pause, a weight lifting from my chest.
He's right. And we wouldn't even need to sneak our way into the electrical building.
"You're a genius," I grin up at him. But we'll need help. Gale will have to be in on this, too. I inwardly sigh. Of course, I have been avoiding him since the pregnancy announcement. Now I must face him and beg for his help. He must help. At least, for the safety of his family.
Peeta and I part ways at the Victor's Village. I continue wandering along the road to Gale's house in the Seam. If it wasn't for the electrical fence, I would have met him in the woods for our hunting session. Now, I'm sure he's anxious about laying food on the table for his family. I might have to sneak some money into Mrs. Hawthorne's hand when Gale isn't watching. For some reason, he hates my generosity. It's just the way he is.
My stomach nearly churns when I rap quietly at his door. I am suddenly nervous and regret showing up here.
Prepare for this to suck, Katniss.
Mrs. Hawthorne cracks open the door. She's slightly taller than me, with light brown curls and a kind smile.
"Hi Hazel, could I talk to Gale?" I try to ask her in a calm tone. She opens the door wider.
"Of course, Katniss. He's in the kitchen," she gestures for me to come inside. I hesitate.
"Actually, could he talk to me out here?"
Her eyebrows knit together, but she nods.
"Thanks," I reply sheepishly. She leaves the threshold, and after a moment, Gale appears. His grey eyes seem the color of steel, and they stare directly into mine.
"We need to talk," I whisper. Gale swallows and glances over his shoulder at his family in the cramped kitchen. He turns back.
"Okay."
We walk a few blocks down from his house, along the short, square houses still dusted with ashes from the fire. At least they were spared. We dip into an alleyway, where hopefully we won't be overheard. Finally, I force myself to turn around and face him.
"Gale, I need help with something very important," I get out. Gale rubs his forehead.
"Why? What now, Katniss?" His voice raises. "Isn't everything just going splendid for you? You certainly did something right for Snow by getting fucking pregnant-"
"Stop it. You don't know anything. It's not real, you idiot," I mutter. Gale scoffs.
"Of course, I forgot. Everything is just a goddamn lie!"
"Look, I don't know how else to make you understand. I have no other choices, this is the only way for us to survive!" I snap at him, angry tears threatening to spill from my eyes.
Why did this already have to escalate so quickly?
He shakes his head, muttering profanities under his breath.
"Don't you see that this is part of a bigger plan? I'm doing this so we can make it out of here. So we can all begin a new life, Gale," I say defensively.
"It makes no sense to me... how could a baby get us out of here?"
I refrain from answering, remembering even here in the Seam, Snow has eyes and ears.
"I have to... discuss it tomorrow. Meet me at Haymitch's house," I whisper. He eyes me reluctantly, a hint of frustration still in his face. At last, he nods.
I don't know what else to say, so I turn on my heel and decide to start on home. I'm taken aback when Gale stops me.
"Katniss. Please tell me... do you love him?" Suddenly, his eyes appear so worried, so vulnerable that I want to give him a definite no. I almost do, standing there with his hand gently gripping my arm. I can't begin to envision the confusion and pain he's endured since all of this news. No matter what I do, I always seem to hurt somebody.
Why, why Katniss?
My lips part, ready to force out the word, but I can't. Something strong tugs inside of me, holding me back. I can't deny it. I have formed an attachment to the boy with the bread, although I have desperately tried not to. It's tortured me these past months, sometimes deeply confusing me or strangely giving me hope and true happiness I've never felt before.
"I don't know," I reply, my voice hoarse. I cannot force myself look at him. His hand releases me.
"It's never a yes or no answer with you," he says quietly. "I bet Peeta enjoys that," he adds, his voice tinged with bitter sarcasm. He walks past me, out of the alley, and down the street.
I feel hallow, almost sick as I watch him leave me. Am I always this uncertain, apathetic person who hardly considers anyone's feelings? Is it wrong that I'm torn? I cover my face with my hands, breathing heavily.
What is happening to us? How was I so careless to allow this?
My feelings melt into anger, and soon everything burns inside of me. I pick up handfuls of ice and chuck them into the street. I try to resist the powerful urge to scream, biting down on my lips. I quickly march home, my hands shoved in my pockets.
It's a miracle when Gale shows up at Haymitch's doorstep for lunch the following afternoon. Somehow, Haymitch manages to shove his bottomless clutter out of sight. A thick, gray carpet of dust still decorates the floor, but at least now his entryway and living room are bearable. The three of us sit awkwardly on his beaten down couch, while Haymitch orders us to remain quiet. He carelessly shoves a plate of moldy biscuits our way. He then quickly draws all of the blinds closed, dims the lights, and locks the door.
"Seems like a cult, Haymitch," Peeta comments with his lips upturned.
"Yeah, well it has to be this way," he grumbles, rummaging through his pocket. He slips out a tiny, square, black device and places it on the coffee table. He holds up a finger, looking up about the room.
"One moment... okay, we should be alright," he nods.
"What does it do?" I ask, intensely gazing at the blinking green light on the machine.
"It scans for potential cameras or listening devices in our radius. If there are any, it temporarily blocks the signals and obscures them," Haymitch explains.
"A few of us received one directly after you two won the games," he gestures to Peeta and I. "But just only recently have we been able to manufacture enough for everyone involved. That's why I didn't have one the first time I discussed this with you, Katniss," He nods to me.
"Exactly who else is involved?" My eyebrows furrow. My mind directly goes to Cinna.
"For their protection, I'd prefer not to say. Only when absolutely necessary, will I reveal the others," Haymitch replies.
I replay all of the times Cinna secretly supported and fought for me and maybe even for the rebellion. With every message-hidden dress, every knowing smile and gesture, did he know?
"As for our escape to Thirteen, there is a lot to discuss..." Haymitch pauses, for the first time glancing nervously at me. He rubs his forehead.
"What?" Gale speaks up. Haymitch sighs.
"The three of you must listen extremely carefully, and do not interrupt. This is much bigger than just the games, than just protecting ourselves... We will go to war, and you all must be prepared."