In A Manner of My Choosing
By Pyreite
Warning: This chapter contains coarse language. Discretion is advised.
Discoveries
"Bull, you don't need to babysit me".
"Just get in the tub and take a bath. I'll wait outside until you're finished".
Ellana scowled when Bull closed the door behind him. She knew he was standing guard outside the washroom. He'd been adamant about looking after her since the Exalted Council had ended. She regretted her decision to join the Chargers. Bull was already assuming the role of her Commander, although he seemed to be doting on her more than usual.
Krem had told her (with a twinkle in his eye) that Bull tended to mother his newest recruits.
"He always looks out for the newest additions to the band. It usually takes them three to four months to really settle in if they don't run away screaming in the first week. You're a special case though. The Chief has a real soft-spot for you. He's already acting like he's your worried father and your overprotective big-brother all in one giant grey-skinned package".
"Real funny, Krem", muttered Ellana.
She sighed and started the slow process of unbuckling her armour. The greaves came off first followed by her belt, boots, coat, and bodice. The hose came off last as did her thick woollen socks. Her nose wrinkled when she smelt a day's worth of sweat. She wiggled her toes with a grimace and tossed her socks on the floor.
"Disgusting".
She was down to her small-clothes when she heard a splash. The folded screen across the room concealed the washroom's large copper tub. Ellana reached for one of her discarded daggers. She pulled the shining silverite blade from its sheath. She wondered where her rude wolf had gone as she slunk towards the screen.
She was relieved when she spied his shaggy outline through the embroidered panels. His fur shone like oil in the candlelight. Ellana crept around the edge of the screen. She was within feet of him and thought he might be drinking the water. She froze when she saw his black fur shrink inwards and his thick lupine legs grow long, slender, and supple.
Ellana gawked as her wolf shifted form. Her eyes were wide and her mouth agape when a man squatted beside the copper tub. He was naked. Ellana saw muscular buttocks and dusky skin the colour of newly turned earth. The waterfall of black hair cascading over his shoulders made her fingers itch.
Ellana's grip tightened on the hilt of her dagger.
The thick-fingered hand testing the water made her twitch.
"Too cold", said the man with a voice reminiscent of Solas.
His fingers glowed red for a moment as he cast a mild heating spell.
Ellana stared when curls of steam rose from the water.
"Ah. Much better".
The man paused as if sensing he was being watched. He glanced over his shoulder, a black eyebrow arched, as he regarded Ellana with a glinting red eye. He smiled at the sight of her shredded breast-band and filthy grass-stained underwear. He was pleased by her state of undress. His lips pealed back from his teeth in a wolfish grin when she blushed.
"Andaran atish'an, vhenan'ara".
Ellana gasped when she saw the pointed tips of his fangs. He chuckled when she lowered the blade of her dagger. She was staring at him as she skirted the edge of the privacy screen. She reached for him with a shaky hand, a look of anxiety on her face, as she wondered if she should touch him. She was amazed when he reached back and took her hand.
Calloused fingers entwined with her own.
A gentle encouraging tug and Ellana closed the distance between them.
She was soon kneeling beside him.
"You are surprised by my appearance".
Ellana nodded.
"Do you know who I am?"
Ellana bit her lip. She had a fair idea. She had seen her wolf shapeshift from lupine form to elven in the blink of an eye. It took more effort than she thought to put her suspicion into words. Dorian had always said that to see was to believe.
"You're, Fen'Harel".
He smiled again with a flash of white fangs.
"Very good, vhenan".
He saw her anxious expression.
"Are you afraid of me?"
Ellana studied the shape of his face. The angular cheeks, cleft chin, and pointed ears were familiar. Ellana would recognise that long nose, thick brows, and pair of wide-set eyes anywhere. The dusky tone of his skin and the mane of thick black hair were different. The colour of his eyes, not stormy-grey, but a deep wine-red set him apart too.
He was the inverse of Solas as different from her lover as night from day.
"You look like him", concluded Ellana. "I didn't think you would".
Fen'Harel snorted. "We are alike in face and form, but we are not the same".
"You said you were twins".
"Of a kind", he confirmed. "But the similarity between us ends there".
Ellana frowned. She was confused by his explanation. She knew he was a spirit, but she hadn't thought he'd be a man too. Cole was the only other spirit she knew of that had assumed human form. He seemed real enough, but he was odd too with his unnerving perceptiveness.
"I don't understand".
Fen'Harel took pity on her.
"You never answered my question. I will ask again. Are you afraid of me?"
Ellana shook her head. "No".
"Why not?"
Ellana's eyes filled with tears. "You stopped Solas from hurting me again". She sniffed. "You saved me when he wouldn't. How can I be afraid of you when you've always protected me?"
The tears trickled down her cheeks.
Fen'Harel regretted making her cry.
"Ir abelas, vhenan".
Ellana hiccuped at the sound of such sincere concern.
Solas had apologised too, but his voice had carried sadness not contrition.
Fen'Harel was surprised when she kissed him. His mouth opened on reflex and a hot tongue slid between his lips. He groaned when Ellana grabbed a fistful of his hair. Her fingers sank into the silky strands, winding tight, as she slid into his lap. Fen'Harel sucked her lower-lip between his teeth when she wriggled like a worm.
He bit her.
Ellana growled.
Fen'Harel grasped her shoulders and pushed her back.
"Venavis!"
"Ar nuvenin ma!" hissed Ellana.
"Nae", gasped Fen'Harel. "You are not ready".
He saw the desire reflected in her eyes. She was eager, ready, and willing. Now was not the time, he knew, for her to be doing things she would later regret. Fen'Harel wanted to become her lover, but not whilst she was pining for his brother. He would erase Solas from her heart, a piece at a time, and place himself there instead.
"What will we do then?" asked Ellana.
Fen'Harel laughed. "Bathe, my love. You stink worse than a dead horse".
Ellana giggled because he was right.
"You made the water hot".
"I did", said Fen'Harel.
She smiled shyly. "Do you intend to take a bath with me?"
Fen'Harel smirked. "Of course I do".
Ellana wiped her wet face and gave the water a longing look. "The tub is big enough for two".
"Then we should", teased her guardian as he reached behind her back. "Make the most of it".
A sly sleight of hand and he'd undone the clasp of her breast-band. Ellana shivered when he made short work of her ruined underwear too. He wasn't shy about sliding the stained strip of silk down her thighs. A teasing glide of his knuckle made her moan. Ellana smacked the hand trying to grab a handful of her arse.
"You turned me down!"
"I have changed my mind".
"No!"
"Vhenan!" grumbled Fen'Harel. "I have not lain with a woman in a thousand years!"
"You had your chance", said Ellana "You chose to be honourable instead of taking me up on my offer. It's your loss, Fen'Harel. You will be taking a bath with me and that is all. We will not be canoodling tonight until I'm ready".
"Fenedhis! You are so cruel!"
Ellana grinned from ear to ear.
"You have no idea".
Fen'Harel pouted unhappily.
Ellana reddened. She had never seen Solas look so put out before. Fen'Harel was adorable. His dusky skin and mane of black hair made him look like an unruly wolf-cub. He whined like one too much to her amusement.
"I said no!"
"Fine", he grumbled. "But I am still sharing your bed tonight".
"In wolf form", declared Ellana.
"Absolutely not!"
"I'm sharing the barracks with the Chargers. I don't have a private room. Bull can't see you like this".
Fen'Harel grinned from ear to ear.
"I think he would appreciate the view".
Ellana gave him an appraising look from head to toe.
"I know I am".
Fen'Harel laughed.
"You will make me blush, vhenan".
Ellana licked her lips.
"I doubt that".
"Truly?"
"I just know you have a filthy mind".
Fen'Harel grinned. "I do".
Ellana had to admit that he was right about Bull.
Her friend was pansexual and appreciated anyone with a nice arse.
Fen'Harel had that and everything else Solas did too.
"No", said Ellana. "You're not sleeping in my bed with me while you're a man".
Fen'Harel glared at her sullenly. "Fine. If you share the barracks with the Iron Bull's band I will sleep beside you in wolf-form. If not than I will share your bed in my elven form". He scowled when she bit her lip and reddened to the tips of her ears.
He hastily amended his earlier statement.
"Fine, vhenan. I will keep a blanket between us while you sleep. I would not want to offend your feminine sensibilities. You are a delicate flower. It would be unseemly of me to take advantage of your innocence".
"Shut up!"
"I will if you kiss me again", goaded Fen'Harel.
Ellana obliged him and he didn't say another word for an hour.
Elvish, Qunlat, and Tevene Translations: Courtesy of the Dragon Age Wiki
Vhenan – Heart.
Fen'Harel – The Dread Wolf – The elven god of Rebellion, Betrayal, and Trickery.
Fenedhis – An elven curse, likely translated to 'wolf crap' or similar.
Andaran antish'an, vhenan'ara – Welcome to my safe-place, my heart's desire.
Ir abelas, vhenan – I am sorry, my heart.
Venavis – Stop.
Ar nuvenin ma – I want you.
Nae – No.
Fenedhis – An elven curse, likely translated to 'wolf crap' or similar.