Chapter 27
-2010
Robin was rocking a sleeping baby Roland when he heard the door.
Marian.
He took a deep breath and laid the baby in his bed, before leaving to her.
She was removing her coat when she saw him, and she smiled.
"Hi. Is Roland asleep?"
"Yes." and then because it needed to be done and post-poning it wasn't helping he said quickly, "Marian, we need to talk."
She froze.
And took a deep breath.
"Let me one second to kiss him goodnight, and we'll talk. Okay?"
"Okay."
She smiled again and left, while he ran a tired hand through his face.
She came back a few minutes later and they stayed facing each other, so far away from one another.
The silence was deafening.
"I've been seeing a therapist. It helps a lot dealing with what happened to us." he blurted out.
Her eyes widened.
"You didn't tell me that!"
He laughed softly.
"When would I have? We never talk, Marian."
She looked down.
"Say what you want to say."
He tilted his head, looking at her.
"You have to see this isn't working."
She sighed and looked at the ceiling, a tear rolling down her cheek.
And then she looked at him and their eyes locked.
"I wish it would."
"So do I."
She smiled sadly.
"What do we do?"
"We go our separate ways, I think."
She nodded, crying.
"And what about Roland?"
"We keep a good relationship, for him. Nothing but him matters. He'll always know us separate so it shouldn't be too hard on him."
She kept silent a long time.
And finally,
"Okay."
And just like that...
It was the end of his marriage.
Wasn't he supposed to feel sadness?
Why did it look an awful lot more like relief?
Regina was cuddled in Jefferson's arms…
But felt nothing.
God she hated herself.
And him.
Mostly she hated him.
"This feels right." breathed Jefferson and she froze and closed her eyes.
But she couldn't tell him.
She had her heart broken beyond repair and she did not wish that for anyone.
So she hummed.
"Move in with me." blurted the man and this time her heart stopped. She receded, eyes wide and panicked. "Move in with me." he said again, smiling. "I know it's soon but I want to be with you all the time. I want this to work. Forever."
She was feeling dizzy.
No.
No.
NO.
She…
She couldn't…
"Regina?" he asked.
She took a deep breath.
-2019
Robin couldn't sleep.
He just couldn't.
And Regina could actually feel it.
She snuggled against his chest and kissed it tenderly.
"What's on your mind, handsome?"
At first, he didn't answer.
"You're not asleep?" he finally murmured, his hand coming to stroke her shoulder.
"You're thinking so loudly it woke me up." she joke and he chuckled slightly, kissing her hair lovingly.
"Sorry." he whispered against her head and she smiled, stroking his chest.
"Tell me." she said softly after a few seconds of silence. "Because if one thing, you don't have to deal with your problems alone anymore, not now that you've got me to share them with."
She looked up at him and could see nothing but love and devotion in the blue of his eyes.
"True." he conceded, one hand coming to stroke her cheek.
But he hesitated a bit before speaking.
He was searching for the right words.
"I don't want to be selfish."
She frowned.
"What? How so?"
Robin took a deep breath and groaned lightly, as if it was difficult for him to say what he was about to say.
"I don't want to force you to leave the States."
"Robin-"
"It's your home. Regina, you've lost enough because of Marian and I, and it hardly seems fair-"
"Please-"
"to ask you to move bloody countries all because we want to! So-"
She put her hand on his mouth and that stopped him at least.
"Can I talk, now?"
He chuckled and nodded, kissing her hand.
"Please, do."
It was her time to take a deep breath.
"I've considered it, Robin." she admitted and he smiled sadly. "Of course I did. But… This? I'm doing it mostly for me." then she amended, "Well, that's not exactly true." their eyes locked. "I'm doing it for us, you and me."
He smiled so lovingly her heart missed a beat.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
"If this really what you want…"
"It is. I need it. I really do."
Robin took a deep breath and nodded,
"Okay."
"Okay."
"So we're doing this?"
She smiled,
"We're doing this."
Regina left her office after telling Gold her decision.
She took a deep breath.
There was no going back now.
A fresh start.
Walking to her office, Regina kept thinking.
This was what was best for them both.
There was no fresh start possible in the States.
Too much had happened.
She had suffered too much here and even if she didn't mean to, a part of her would always be kept back.
England seemed amazing right about now.
Her hand came playing with the necklace Robin had got her and she smiled.
She loved him so very much.
She would follow him anywhere.
Hell included.
She opened the door and then stopped.
Madelyn was there.
"Did you really think you could leave without me knowing?" she asked, arms crossed.
Regina's heart fall to the bottom of her chest.
"Mal…" tears pricked at the back of her eyes, her lips trembling as she admitted. "I couldn't say goodbye. Not to you. It was too hard."
Her voice broke and Madelyn looked touched.
Then she cleared her throat and smiled.
"It's a good thing you won't have to, then."
"What do you mean?"
"Gold told me, offered me a job there too. He said we work well together and he needs a team he can trust overseas."
Regina couldn't believe it.
"Are you serious?"
Madelyn laughed.
"I am!"
"But… your life here?"
"Regina, for the last twenty years you've been the most important person of my life. You're like a sister to me. I can't…" she cleared her throat, looking annoyed at herself for showing she had emotions. "I can't imagine living here without you."
"Oh Mal…"
"And plus, someone will have to be there to keep some pressure on Robin, and to look after Roland when you two want a night off and-"
But she couldn't finish her sentence.
Regina had run to her, hugging her tightly in her arms.
And even more unusual,
Madelyn hugged her back.
"Did you really think I would miss your happy ending?"
Regina laughed and closed her eyes.
Robin was waiting for Regina when the door opened.
"I'm home, boys!" she screamed and his heart missed a beat, because he couldn't believe this was his new reality.
He still didn't think he deserved it.
But at that moment Regina came in, as beautiful as ever.
She kissed Roland's hair and then walked to him and he hugged her tightly before kissing her lips.
"What was that for?" she asked happily and he pecked her lips again.
"Just because I love you."
She giggled and kissed his clothed chest.
"I love you too, so much."
Then, the door rang again.
"Mummy!" screamed Roland, running to the door.
Marian soon arrived, holding Roland in her arms.
"Hi." she smiled and Robin smiled back,
"How are you, Marian?"
"Fine. You two?"
"Fine." smiled Regina.
And yes, it was still so very awkward between the three of them.
But it would be alright.
"Before we go, I just wanted to let you both know that the wedding will be in England, my parents' estate."
"That seems like a good idea." said Robin and she smiled.
"Well… I should go. Say goodbye to daddy and Regina?"
Roland nodded, hugged his father and Regina before waving and then they were gone.
Regina studied her boyfriend, frowning slightly.
"You seem pensive."
Robin chuckled and brought her to him.
"I was just thinking about something."
She cuddled against his chest, lulled by his heartbeat.
"About what?"
Robin hummed.
"About how maybe this won't be the only wedding happening in England this year."
Regina's heart was beating so loud he had to hear it.
She receded and their eyes locked, brown in blue.
And then she kissed him, hoping she could make him understand the strength of what she was feeling about him.
For the first time in forever...
She wasn't afraid of the future.
Quite on the contrary actually,
She couldn't wait.
-2010
Divorces papers were signed.
And Robin wasn't even sad.
Not even a little bit.
He was upset, yes.
But more out of habit than sadness.
He was actually sad he would spend less time with his beloved son, but not about his wife.
Well, ex-wife.
But now, after a few months of therapy he finally had understood something.
He didn't owe it to their daughter to make it work.
It wasn't honoring her memory like he had first thought it was.
Nothing would possibly bring her back, but he would never forget her.
Even if he was not with Marian.
Robin took a deep breath and let his mind wander…
To Regina.
As usual.
He couldn't stop thinking about her.
She was always in some small part of his mind.
How was she?
Was she married?
Was she happy?
All he wanted to do was look for her and reach out but he couldn't.
She would reject him.
And she would be right to.
He sighed and buried his face in his hands.
"How did it go?" asked Madelyn and Regina laughed darkly before taking a sip of her drink.
"Not good."
"He didn't take it well?"
She scoffed and buried her face in her hands.
Madelyn frowned.
"Not exactly."
The blond groaned loudly.
She knew that face.
"Oh God. Regina, what happened?"
The brunette looked up, eyes glassy and so very lost.
"I couldn't tell him I wanted to break up."
"WHAT?"
"I couldn't Mal. I couldn't break his heart... I know too well how that feels."
"But you can't stay with him not to hurt him!"
Regina swallowed.
"Oh there is more to this, isn't it?" frowned Madelyn.
Regina nodded.
"He asked me to move in with him."
"Oh for God's sake."
"I just… I didn't know what to do."
A silence.
"It's easy. You say no."
"Nothing about any of this is easy, Mal."
Another silence.
"You don't love him."
"You don't know that!" tried to defend Regina but her best friend glared at her.
"I've seen you in love before. I know."
Regina froze, heart breaking again in her chest and tears pricking at the back of her eyes.
"Don't." she warned and Madelyn sighed,
"Fine. Sorry."
Another silence.
"I told him I couldn't live with him. That I needed some time."
"What did he say?"
"That he could wait."
"Do you love him?"
Regina downed her drink and ordered another before she murmured,
"You know the answer to that."
Mal sighed deeply and looked at her best friend,
This would not end well.