Stuck in the Middle With Chew

Chapter 7:

Jurassic Pussy

3 weeks earlier

'put the fucking money in the bag before I lay you out, bitches!' A shadowy figure looms over a collective shivering in fear. The figure raises a shotgun just above their heads and fires. 'Did I fucking stutter!?'

The space bank tellers scramble quickly to fit as much money as they could within the bag held out in front of them. 'There…' one of the tellers yelped, 'that's all we have in the vaults! Please let us go'.

The figure stared blankly at the terrified crew, creating a tension most palpable. The figure parted its legs revealing an incredibly hairy pussy. The scent of ammonia invaded the nostrils of each victim, like a bloat fly larva burying within its host.

'Look deeply within', the figure screeched, 'remember this pussy as the best and hairiest pussy that ever let you walk free'. One of the bank tellers turned to it and screamed. The figure wrapped its legs around the victim's head.

'you dare to protest this fucking perfection!?' the figure angrily remarked. Slowly, the terrified bank employee began to absorb within the confines of the shaggy yet fleshy vagina. The screams subsided as the victim's face became fully penetrated within the Cooch. The hungry pussy continued its slow conveyer belt like properties until the entire person was inseminated fully.

'I guess this pussy is on fire today!' the mysterious stranger proclaimed. With that statement, the figure lit a match and held it in front of their bulbous vulva. It quickly erupted into flames and bathed everyone in the bank in a beautiful orange fiery hell.

'Now how's that for a smoking hot pussy?!' The figure mocked as they walked off over the horizon with a swag matched only by the most sickening of runway models.

1 week later

The mysterious hairy figure slammed her space grenade launcher down on the table with the full force of 10 men.

'Don't dick me around Lando, I know he was here!' They stated. Lando fell back in fear and near collapsed upon boxes of Kitonak fetish porn. He stared up at the figure as it dimly came into view.

'Mallatobuck?!' he cried out in fear whilst reapplying the slug flesh-light back onto his penis. 'I thought you were dead!?'

'Why?' she inquired with genuine curiosity. 'Well,' Lando explained, 'I dunno, just assumed you were dead as I had not heard from you for a few weeks'.

She aggressively slapped his sex slug off his cock and growled at Lando. 'Don't distract me with your big black cock!' she screamed, 'tell me where he is, now!'

'Who?' Lando cried out.

'Tell me where Han Solo is, right now!?' she screeched at the top of lungs which caused Lando's bollocks to pop slightly.

'Why do you need to know where Han is?' Lando asked.

'I need to find Han before he sucks my husbands' cock! Is that clear!?' Mallatobuck replied, 'he stole my sex tips and my special sex lubricant that forces wookiee's to fall in love with them'.

Present day

Luke Skywalker and the Wampa ice creature stare in shock at the scantily clad and sexually erotic figure before them. Sweet droplets of jizz fall from the hairy hairy cooch cooch stood over them, whilst a big bear-like claw scratches desperately to stop the vaginal itching. Suddenly Mallatobuck runs towards the Wampa ice creature and press firmly against it's temple.

'Who the fuck are you guys, tell me now or this furry fuck's brains get splattered on your beautiful chest'. Mallatobuck cries in a language that was barely discernable.

Luke bursts into tears and throws himself at Mallatobuck's hairy and disgustingly stinky feet, making Luke vomit slightly upon them. 'Please don't hurt my beautiful boy!' Luke pleads 'He's so cute and he always does this little adorable thing where he squeaks whenever he's about to cum!'

'Alright, Jesus fucking Christ!' The furry female replies with a sickened undertone. She lowers her gun and her damn attitude. 'All I need to know is where they are, by which I mean Han Solo and Chewie', Mallatobuck asks.

Luke takes his tongue out of Wampa ice creatures anus momentarily in order to reply. 'I haven't seen Han for a few months now, but last I knew – Han was going to treat Chewie to some sausage and mash. That's Chewie's favourite!'

'Yes, I fucking know that! Don't you think I fucking know my own husbands favourite fucking food, FUCK!' Mallatobuck screeched.

'Geez lady,' Luke replied 'I think you've got a lot of issues. No wonder Chewie left you!'.

Mallatobuck fell to her knees and sobbed, blowing her nose into her own fur – making the Wampa ice creature gag in revulsion. 'Why doesn't Chewie love me!' She said in between tears, 'Does my pussy stink that bad! I cleaned it with aldi's cheapest shower gel just for this occasion!'

Mallatobuck quickly gathered herself and decided to stand with resolve 'I will force him to fuck me and love me! I will make my husband adhere to his vows. And I will envelope his sperm within my beard!'. And with that, Mallatobuck spun around like a steady Susan and stormed off with the speed of at least 5 cheetahs. The Wampa ice creature then shrugged and re-engaged in tea-bagging luke skywalker. Luke began to giggle 'Oh Wampa, you sex monster'.

Then the Wampa ice creature replied 'Come on, let's do it some more. You raunchy love handle!'

Back with Vader and the gang (bang).

Vader furiously scrambled trying to locate the rest of his beautiful and sexy kidnapped crew. Chewie and Han were frozen together but with dicks docked deliciously. Vader took a quick pic on his space iphone for the wank bank. Princess Leia was completely encompassed by snow, except for two massive tits with rosy, red nip nips on show. She was slowly drowning in the snow. The droids were all completely smashed upon landing, only their metallic dicks survived – kept safe within the confines of Leia's damaged vagina. Vader pierced the snow where he believed Leia's mouth to be with his very own penis whilst announcing, 'breathe through this straw!'.

Leia quickly sucked as hard as she could, causing the dark lord to wildly jizz. Leia screamed and rose up like a woman levitating in a magic show. She fixed her eyes on Vader.

'That is the last mistake you will make, father!' Leia announced as she pressed a button on the side of her left breast. Out from her nipples, a sharpened blade protruded. She swiped her titties furiously at Vader whilst running towards him, slashing all his leg hair off. Vader screamed, he had not shaved since he was 16 and did not want to go through that again.

'Running will get you nowhere!' Leia mocked at Vader, who was standing completely still. 'I will find you, and I will break you!'.

At this point, Vader pulled out a remote from within his anus. 'I don't generally use this as it's a bit naff to use as a plot device, but I'm teleporting away', Vader announced, 'I'm off bitches'.

Vader pressed the button, but unfortunately he had pulled out the wrong device from within his anus, it immediately stripped him of all his clothes and changed his sex. Suddenly Fem Vader was sporting a pair of jugs that you could confuse with mountains, and a hairy pussy that looked a little bit like Lando's moustache.

Leia stared in shock as Vader giggled stating 'Oh aren't I just the silliest bitch out there! I done gone and changed my wiener into a wiener warmer!'.

Leia had always fantasized about a female version of her father. She slowly walked closer to fem Vader, and pushed her nipples into Fem Vader's – as if they were kissing.

'Oh father, or mother should I say now, Your tits are to die for!'

'Well that's perfect then!' a mysterious voice cried out, 'Because I'm gonna fucking kill ya all! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH'.

Fem Vader and Leia turned to face the mysterious figure and gasped.

'Sam H?!' they both screamed out

'No, I'm mallatobuck!' The mysterious figure replied.

'Whose that!?' Fem Vader questioned.

Mallatobuck's gaze turned to see a glacial like thing, with Han Solo and Chewbacca docking dicks together within.

'WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?' She screamed, 'Now you're all gonna pay!'

She fires her special sexual miniaturising beam and turns them all into tiny beings. With one fell swoop she picks them all up and forces them into her hairy vaginal crevice!

'Good luck getting out!' Mallatobuck mocked, 'No one ever leaves my pussy alive!'

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