Fran betas. Dani, Ariel, and Gemma preread. Mary was incredibly helpful during these training scenes - believe me I have not a single clue. Any mistakes are mine. Also, thanks to Ariel for being in person with me when I wrote this chapter over two weeks ago - she was literally my Edward as I tried to describe how his and Bella's arms would be positioned. She held me, and I loved it. LOL
"You ready?" Edward stands next to me, his hands resting gently on his hips as he waits for a reaction from me.
"Is that a trick question?" I try to joke, though I try to swallow down the panic rising in my throat. I shake my head, in all honesty. "Because, no. I'm not ready."
"You will be," he smiles, nodding in understanding. "Maybe not today, but you will."
He bends to reach for the gun where I've carried it in my bag, handling it with a casual precision that makes me trust him even more than I'm begrudgingly ready to admit. He holds the gun out for me to take, and I grab the cold metal in my hand with trepidation.
I've never seen something look so out of place in my life.
I shake my head at my discomfort, bringing my eyes up to his. He's watching me with that smile on his face, the one he uses when he's trying to keep the rest of his amusement hidden as not to offend me. "I don't know the first thing to do. I've never even held one of these things until I got to the cabin."
"'One of these things'," He laughs and motions for me to mirror his movements. "Here."
He raises his arms straight forward, and I nod and do the same. "Okay."
He pretends to hold a gun of his own in his hands, showing me how to position the gun within my own. When I'm settled, he steps away to the side. "Close your eyes." He says, his voice low as we take the first step before everything changes. "Breathe."
"Like this?" I do what he says, holding the gun out in front of me. I feel the way my body rises and falls with each breath, the sounds of the trees rustling in the air reminding me where I am and what I'm out here to do.
"You're doing great, Bella. Keep your eyes closed and hold your hands like this." I hear him step closer to me, and soon I can feel his presence closer than he's ever been. I open my eyes to see his hands hover above my own. "Is this okay?"
I swallow quickly, the thought of Edward's hand on mine triggering memories I'm trying so hard to forget. But just as quickly as the dark images come, they're erased at the thought of what his large hands would feel like on my skin. "Yes," I answer.
Though I knew they were coming because he had the awareness to know I needed to be asked first, his hands on mine, take me by surprise.
Maybe him, too.
His hands, large, warm, and calloused from years of hard work, dwarf my own as they wrap around both them and the gun held tightly within my grasp. He stands to my side, one arm beneath both of my own, his other on the outside, as our hands touch.
The last time a man had touched me, I was crouching in the corner, waiting for him to stop. But this time, the blood beneath my skin heats to a noticeable level.
Edward clears his throat but doesn't let go of my hands. I'm not sure I want him to just yet.
"This is what I want you to do. Just focus on your breathing. Deep breath in," he demonstrates, and I can't help but close my eyes at his proximity. "Deep breath out. Keep your arms out; yeah, like that. You okay?"
The way he takes time to periodically check in with me throughout our time helps soothe my shattered nerves.
"It's heavy," I say with a laugh, not realizing the strain it has put on my arms to keep them out and steady for as long as I have so far.
"Eventually your arms will recognize the weight." He says with a chuckle. "When you're ready, open one eye and focus on that tree right over there. That's your target."
I wait a moment in silence, taking the time for my body to adjust to this new situation. Eventually, I do what he says when I feel like it's time. "Breathe, steady hand, eye on the target. Got it." I focus my aim on the tree across the meadow. "Now what?"
"The shot is yours, Bella. When you're ready."
I can't help but think we're talking about more than just the gun in my hand. I let his words wash over me, my eye steady on the tree and my breathing slow and even as I work through my biological responses to shooting a gun for the first time.
I pull the trigger - and recognize the Snap Caps, designed to mimic the feel of taking a real shot but made to avoid damaging the components, Edward must have loaded instead.
I drop my stance completely and turn back to Edward in confusion.
"What the – not a real bullet yet?"
"You need to feel comfortable with yourself first," he says simply, reaching for my hand to coax me back into position. "Bullets next time."
It takes three more sessions in the meadow before I shoot for center mass of the pumpkin Edward and I had brought to use as my target.
But when I hit the pumpkin, the exploding orange blends in with the color of the fall foliage around us, it's Edward cheering me on that makes me feel like a changed woman.
Yesss she did it! And we got our time jump! And we have touching! AND BELLA IS GOING TO KICK SOME ASS!
*clears throat and calms down a little* See you tomorrow!