Notes:

And now we meet Star, who I've taken the liberty of changing a bit aesthetically. Johansen blood don't make no dainty Disney girls.

Chapter Text

Chapter 2 (EDITED 12/22/2020)

As I'm walking to the Principal's office, wondering whether or not I should have asked for a hall pass before leaving, I see the man himself with a chest under his arm. Principal Skeeves is a short, round guy with a head so shiny he -has- to wax it. Pair that with glasses and a weird French looking mustache, and you have the guy who runs Echo Creek High.

He seems to be chatting with a girl I've never seen, who is staring intently at a water fountain, "Ah! Marco Diaz, just the person I wanted to see. I needed the safest, most reliable kid in the school for a special task: This is Star Butterfly, our new foreign exchange student. You're responsible for showing her around and teaching her what she needs to know."

I'm still blinking in shock at the news that I wasn't called out for my Bad Boy behavior (thank god, NO ONE MUST KNOW ABOUT THE LITTERING) when Skeeves plum runs off, muttering something about all fifty flavours. I sigh, then take a closer look at the new girl. My first impression of her is that she seems intense and excited, a bundle of energy wrapped up in a cute dress that my finely tuned eyes can't quite make out the material of. She has a massive waterfall of blond hair that goes down to her knees, and seems to be almost the size of the rest of her body. Bright blue eyes, weird heart shaped sticker things on her cheeks, and an athletic build complete the picture. She's not exactly bulky, but she clearly works out-kinda like some of those cheerleaders who get biceps from lifting other people all the time?

Still, more important than her weird look is that she is currently poking the water fountain in confusion. I start walking her way, figuring she might need some help figuring it out (some European countries are third world enough not to have running water, right?) but before I can get there, she figures out which button to press. Unfortunately, that clearly scares this 'Star Butterfly' girl, but instead of doing the understandable thing and flinching back, the crazy girl starts biting the stainless steel fountain, "Whoah whoah whoah! What the heck are you doing?!"

I ask, running up to yank her away from the fountain, "Open up!" I immediately order the girl, gesturing at her mouth. She blinks at me, then shrugs and opens her lips. I check her teeth for any signs of dangerous chipping, then let out a sigh of relief when she has perfectly healthy chompers, "Don't chew on metal! You could permanently ruin your teeth!" I immediately start lecturing the poor, clearly uneducated foreigner on the dangerous things people do to their teeth every day, from candy, to chewing on ice, and more.

Halfway through, Star says, "Ohhhh….you must be the Safe Kid Skeevy was talking about! Hi Safe Kid! I'm Star Butterfly!" she beams those perfect white teeth at me, and I sigh, realizing that as usual my lectures are being ignored.

I rub my hand over my face, and gesture for Star to follow me, "First of all, I am NOT the Safe Kid. My name is Marco Diaz, and I-oh, watch your step, loose tile." I snag the (definitely muscular) arm of the girl and slide her away from that nasty trip hazard, then close a locker that was recklessly left open. After a few moments, I continue ranting a little with Star still skipping beside me, "I don't know who told you about that, but I am definitely a misunderstood bad boy. I love danger and taking risks! I could use a bit more, to be honest."

I realize at this point that I'm not exactly being a great tour guide, but hey-I've gotta introduce her to me first! Can't have her thinking- "Ohhh, a bad kid huh? Man, I know about that." Star says, with the air of an experienced troublemaker, and casually waves a hand I now notice is carrying some weird toy wand, "As for more danger, sure! Ferocious Butterfly Transformation!" Star yells out some weird incantation and points her wand at a nearby butterfly. I blink, a bit uncertain what she wants from me here-should I play along with her imagination? Just as I'm thinking that, the wand begins to glow a bright pink, before zapping out a laser beam at the butterfly. The small insect transforms into a giant monstrous version of itself the size of a small truck, and gives a weird scream/hiss/roar right into my face. It has teeth-why does it have teeth? The monster flies away from us and snags another student from the ground, who lets out a scream as he is flown off into the distance.

I of course am pretty much in shock, and the only thing I can think to do is throw a questioning/accusing look at Star, raising my hand in the direction that the monster disappeared to. The blond girl lets out a nervous giggle, pulling her wand up to begin nibbling on it (damn you plastic is bad too!), "I, um, whoops! You said you wanted more danger, right? Well there it goes! That kid is, uh, probably dead though."

I just blink at her, before finally finding my voice, "WHAT WAS THAT?!" I yell at her, throwing my hands out in frustration. Really, what the hell? Was that magic? Is a movie being shot? I'm nowhere near interesting enough for a prank show, and I don't see any cameras.

Star suddenly lets out another million watt smile, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet. I've noticed that she rarely ever isn't moving. "Oh! That was a spell I made up, with my wand here!" she says, pointing at it, "You see, Mister Bad Boy Diaz, I'm a Magical Princess from another Dimension!" the girl twirls her wand in an arc over her head, a rainbow following in its wake. Little creatures seem to spawn on the rainbow, that look ever so cute, at least until the whole thing catches fire. Most of them burn to a crisp while a nearby tree catches fire.

This is my final straw, way past my breaking point of weirdness. I give the girl my biggest smile, pull my hood up and say, "W-well that ends the tour! Good luck!" before turning and dashing away. School isn't over, but considering the fire quickly spreading across the school grounds, it'll probably be ended early anyway.

I hear her screaming out, "Bye New Friend! Bye bye! See you later!" As I go. It only makes me run faster away from the weird girl who can summon rainbows and monsters that kidnap people. Martial Arts is -not- equipped to deal with that, so I start to make my way home. With luck, the police will get her and she'll be the government's problem.