THC
Hufflepuff
DADA Professor
Round 2, Year 8
Standard
Words: 1,239
Prompts: (Dialogue, Multi-line) "No." / "That's not the correct response."
(Animal) Cow
A/N Thank you so much to my wonderful teammates!
Saturday, 1300 Hours
Snape's jaw dropped. He could not believe what he was seeing.
Tonks and Charlie, who had been unable to get out before their professor entered, were sneaking glimpses of him from behind the couch they were hiding behind. They were biting their lips to keep from laughing.
"There is a cow in my room! Why is there a cow in my room?!"
28 Hours Earlier
Tonks had learned a long time ago that the best way to persuade a Weasley to do something was to threaten them. Thankfully, she had saved a piece of blackmail she was prepared to use.
Tonks was hiding behind a statue in the corridor, waiting for Charlie to leave Transfiguration. As he was walking by, she grabbed him and dragged him into the passageway behind the statue. Charlie was too stunned to even scream for help.
"Whatever you dragged me down here for, forget about it! It's bound to get me detention again, and I'm already in deep water with my mother. If I get in trouble one more time, I'll be forced to spend time with Percy this summer." He shuddered at the thought of having to spend time with his least favorite sibling.
Tonks had an easy smirk on her face. "Really? Because I seem to remember catching you setting up a prank for a certain caretaker."
Charlie instantly paled. "You wouldn't."
"You really want to test that theory?"
"Not particularly, no."
"Good. Then you're going to help me?"
"No."
"That's not the correct response."
Charlie sighed. "Fine. I will help you. Reluctantly."
"I'll take what I can get."
"What do you need me to do?"
"Now you're asking the right questions. I need you to find me a cow."
Charlie gaped at her. "A cow? What do you think I am? A farmer?"
Tonks rolled her eyes. "Then think of a way to find one."
"Why do you even need a cow?"
"To get back at the bat of the dungeons."
"What'd he do this time?"
"He gave me detention because I tripped and spilled a bottle of ink all over his paperwork."
"So what are you going to do with the cow?"
"Put it in his room."
She left without another word, leaving him wondering if it would be worth it to back out and have her tell of his recent troublemaking. He decided almost instantly that it wasn't; there was a reason Percy-the-snitch only had one friend.
16 Hours Earlier
"You have got to be kidding me. She would kill us!" Tonks exclaimed after Charlie had told her his idea.
"Do you have any other suggestions?"
Tonks hated the fact that she didn't.
Charlie smirked. "That's what I thought."
"Let's say I agree to this course of action. What would the plan be?" Tonks grumbled.
"As I may remind you, you're the brains of the operation. You only recruited me to figure out how to get a cow, which I have done."
Tonks couldn't believe Charlie had gotten two over her in as many minutes.
"Fine. I'll come up with the plan, but you're helping me. There's no way I'll be able to pull it off on my own."
6 Hours Earlier
Tonks could not believe that she was about to kidnap Rita Skeeter. Granted, Rita was her worst nemesis and deserved what was coming after she had told the whole school that Tonks was sleeping with one of the professors (which Tonks swore up and down wasn't true). Tonks was just afraid of what Rita would do once she went back to human form.
It was an early Saturday morning for Tonks and Charlie. Tonks absolutely abhorred mornings, but she knew that this was the best time of day to set their plan in motion. It was also a Hogsmeade weekend; the mischief team wanted to pick a day where it wouldn't be suspicious if Rita went missing for the day.
Charlie and Tonks met before the sun had even risen to set their plan in motion.
"You've got your wand, right?" Charlie asked.
"Do I—I always have my wand on me, you lunatic! We grew up during He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named's reign! Also, Uncle Sirius always told me to have my wand on me in case a situation arises where I can prank someone."
"Your uncle definitely sounds like an interesting bloke. But we can discuss him later. Right now we need to focus on getting Rita and turning her into a cow."
The two of them crept through the different passages that Tonks had found over her previous years at Hogwarts. All of the passages connected to the kitchens, and there were passages to all of the Houses from there.
"I still want to know how you found these passages," Charlie said as they crept through the tunnel from the kitchens to the Slytherin dormitory.
"I'm allowed my secrets."
"My bet is that you found them by playing cat-burglar with one of your flings."
"Ooh, kinky!"
Charlie's cheeks heated, and he quickly changed the subject. "Any idea on how we're going to subdue Rita?"
Tonks laughed. "Yes, my kinky friend. I'll use Fulgari on her."
"Come again?"
Tonks rolled her eyes. "Fulgari is a dueling spell that wraps an invisible rope around your opponent. In short, we're going to hog-tie her."
"Now who's the kinky one?"
The fear in Rita's eyes when they had her tied up was so worth the punishment Tonks knew was to ensue.
Present
Before Charlie could stop her, Tonks stood up and said, "It's rather rude to call someone a cow, Professor."
Snape whirled around to face her. "You are responsible for this?! Who helped you?"
Charlie sheepishly revealed himself.
"I should have known a Weasley was involved. Your whole lot is a bunch of troublemakers. Wait, that cow is a person?"
Tonks smirked. "How else did you expect us to get a cow in here?"
Snape glared at her. "Who is it?"
"Now why would I tell you that?"
"Because I will guarantee that you will scrub my cauldrons clean with your toothbrush for the next three months if you do not."
Tonks shuddered at the thought. "You're no fun."
"That is the point, Nymphadora."
Tonks made a face at her first name but did not dare correct the professor. Instead of answering his question, though, she asked, "Haven't you noticed anyone missing around the castle today?"
"I am in no mood for your games." Then realization dawned on him, and he scrubbed a hand down his face. "You turned Rita Skeeter into a cow."
"I could have turned her into a beetle. Actually, come to think of it, that would have been fitting for her. She is as much of a pest as a bug is."
Snape pulled his wand from his robes and cast Revelio.
Rita shifted from a cow to her normal bleach-blonde self. She looked fit to be tied. "Wait until my father hears about this!"
Despite the trouble they were in, Tonks and Charlie couldn't help but laugh.
53 Hours Later
Tonks sneered at the cauldron in front of her. "This sucks."
Charlie glared at her. "You're the reason we're here!"
"Silence!" Snape snapped. "No talking in detention. Both of you should know that from the astounding number of detentions you both have had."
Tonks and Charlie went back to scrubbing the cauldrons with their toothbrushes, both planning a way to get revenge on Snape.