Hello again! I still have a couple of chapters under production, and they should finish this long journey. I have gotten out a lot during this story, and I've sure enjoyed writing it! It just feels like it has to end now, and so it will. I'm gonna try to wrap it up in two more chapters, but worry not! For all of you TLOU and TWD fanatics, I'm working on a crossover! It's already a few chapters strong, but I'll publish it once I finish this. Stay tuned! Enjoy!

Chapter 33

Ellie sat on the armchair the whole time Joel was away. She stared at the table and the empty cans on it, rewinding the whole morning in her head. It was her fault. She knew it was.
Suddenly, she heard a knock on the door, and she turned instantly. It had to be Joel, so she didn't do anything. Once the door opened, she wasn't surprised to see his face.

Joel closed the door behind him, pushing his pistol back to it's holster while heading towards the living room. He kept his eyes on the gun until it was back in it's place, then turning to see Ellie. She wasn't really looking forward to this conversation, so she kept her eyes on the table.

Surprisingly enough, Joel stayed quiet. He looked at her on and off for a while, then lowering his gaze and walking up to the couch. As he sat on it, he put down his backpack and exhaled deeply. Ellie frowned her face, now daring to look at him for the first time after he had gotten back. Why wasn't he angry anymore? He didn't seem completely normal, either.
"Joel? Is everything alright?" Ellie asked carefully not to make him go crazy again. She had been so sure the whole rage was her fault that she was surprised that he hadn't been arguing right after he got back.

Instead of yelling and shouting at Ellie, Joel sighed. He frowned his face while lifting it up and staring at the fireplace.
"Not everything" he scoffed, trying to skip the thing that was really bothering him. After a moment of silence, he shook his head a few times before turning to see Ellie. She was still looking at him, and their eyes met.
"We didn't finish our talk last night" he lowered his voice, coughing once to get something off his throat.

But Ellie didn't reply right away. She furrowed a brow, gazing into Joel's eyes fearlessly. They had been travelling together long enough that she could tell when he was lying. Something was off.

"That's not what's bothering you, is it?" Ellie spoke quietly with a questioning look, but Joel kept his poker face. He scoffed again before opening his mouth.
"It don't matter. What matters is that-"
"What happened between the two of you? She was all devastated when you left and-"
"Nothing happened between us" Joel answered with the loudest voice so far, pronouncing every word slowly enough to get his message through.

But Ellie didn't buy it. She knew that they had been doing more than talking last night, but why was he suddenly so angry about it? Ellie searched his face, getting the oddest feeling she had ever gotten with him. He was not his own self.
"You regret it?" Ellie kept inquiring, making Joel real uncomfortable. Once she got that idea, she became more subtle about it.

Suddenly, Joel stood up from the couch, taking one step closer to Ellie with his teeth bit together. The girl swallowed while staring at him, seeing that she was walking on the thinnest ice so far. His eyes were deadly as he stared at her.

Joel didn't know what to say, so he decided to keep the deadly gaze pointed at Ellie with a closed mouth. She wasn't afraid of his eyes, even though they usually scared her enough to shut her mouth if needed. Despite that, she wasn't afraid of him in general. Why would she?
"You can't fool me, Joel. Why can't you just talk?" Ellie said quietly enough to make it seem like a whisper after the recent volume. She was serious. He had been so tense that Ellie started to feel very uncomfortable with him, and her emotions gave out that much. She looked at him as honestly as she could, trying to calm him down.

Joel easened up the serious gaze, swallowing while letting his eyes wander a bit. Ellie kept her own at him, getting the feeling that her message was finally getting through. After a short while of silence, she lowered her gaze while opening her mouth.
"I'm… I'm really starting to feel uncomfortable with you being so… so tense all the time"

That seemed to resonate in him. Joel's eyes returned to Ellie, who was again looking at him. Her eyes were honest and a bit sad, and it made Joel soften out. He regretted the threatening step he had taken towards her, and slowly backed down to sit on the couch. Joel sighed while moving his eyes to the table. After a while of thinking, he shook his head.
"I for sure didn't mean to…" he said quietly, leaning forward against his knees.
"Shit" he mumbled, putting his head down. Despite all, Ellie felt bad for him.
"It's just…" he cut off his sentence again. The girl put her gaze down, thinking it would be easier for him to talk like that. Joel started rewinding in his head, but not only last night. After a moment of silence, he scoffed and shook his head again.
"You wouldn't understand"

And Ellie awoke again. She furrowed her brows while lifting up her gaze again.
"No. This I don't understand. I've told you about my fears. About how I feel about all this, yet you can't spare me a single thought" Ellie argued, getting up from the armchair with a determined sound in her voice.
"It's not just a single thought, Ellie…"
"I don't care, Joel! We've come far enough together that you should trust me already, I think you could give me that much!"
"I trust you, Ellie…"
"Then what is it? Huh? What's so difficult I couldn't possibly understand it?"

During the whole argue, Joel wasn't shouting anymore. Ellie kept her volume up while Joel spoke rather quietly back. He sighed before lifting his head up. He didn't look happy, and neither did she.
"I do. I do regret it" he said while putting his head back down.

Then Ellie shut her mouth. She stopped shouting and the look on her face changed. She had finally gotten it out. It required ambition, but she finally got him to open up. Though she didn't know how much.
"Oh" she sighed, furrowing a brow while sitting back to the armchair. Joel thought of what he had just said, and Ellie didn't know what to think. Neither of them had the guts to look at each other, so they just sat quietly and went through their own thoughts.
"I… I'm sorry" Ellie started, and Joel reacted immediately.
"No, no. Don't be, just…"
"No, I mean it. I should've realized that right away" she continued, lifting her head up to see his face.
"I can tell when you're off, and you didn't deserve my bullying. I am sorry"
Joel sighed before lifting his head too. They shouldn't be arguing. Their relations to other people shouldn't affect things between the two of them.
"Yeah" he exhaled, lowering his gaze again.

They were suddenly interrupted by quick steps hitting the porch and approaching the front door. Both of them quickly stood up from their seats, grabbing their guns just in time to see the door slam open.
"What the fuck's wrong with you?!" Alice shouted while storming inside. Joel instantly lowered the gun, even though the woman seemed to approach him rather quickly. He stepped further away from the couch and away from the living room not to leave Ellie in between them.
"Alice?" Ellie wondered out loud while Joel stayed quiet. She also took a step closer, for she noticed that Alice had something on her mind. To their astonishment, the woman continued by stepping in front of Joel and instantly slapping his cheek with her palm. A silent grunt escaped his lips as he took a step back. Nathan had barely gotten inside when the hassle had already begun. He looked bothered by the situation, yet he stayed quiet while walking just a bit closer.
"Hey!" Ellie shouted while looking at Alice. She got closer to them with her pistol, but Nathan instantly lifted his own to point it at Ellie. She stopped, lowering her gun while glaring at Nathan.
"You fuck me, avoid me and lie to me? Nathan just told me the girl's fucking IMMUNE, and you told me nothing?" Alice kept on shouting at Joel, who was clearly taller than her and standing right in front of her. Despite the slap, he did nothing to avoid the situation. He bit his teeth together, way too tired to fight back. After all, he did think he deserved it. Not because he hadn't told her about Ellie, but because he felt so bad about himself. He didn't want to hurt Alice, so he stood quietly and let her continue despite the horrified look on Ellie's face. Unlike him, she didn't see a need to this.
"Fuck you!" Alice suddenly cried, not holding it back this time. She loaded a fist right at his face, making him fall down due the surprise and the power loaded to those knuckles.
"Joel!" Ellie shouted while already taking a step towards them, but Nathan kept her from moving any closer. He stared at Ellie, since looking at the adults would only have made him feel worse.

Joel took it all. He lied on the ground on his back, feeling his nose with his other hand before looking up. It was bleeding. He did think he should say something, but he didn't know what.
"You pig!" Alice continued, now loading a kick to his side in sync with the shout. That side was the one with the biggest wound, and he was not prepared for pain of that size.
Joel grunted in pain, since it was the most he had been hurt in a long time. He laid his hands on the wound, closing his eyes and trying to pant the pain out.
"Stop it!" Ellie shouted, and even Nathan had to give in. His mother had gone too far, and he finally turned his head to see the man lying on the floor.
"Mom…" Nathan said quietly while Ellie finally approached the adults. She ran in between Joel and her, lifting her gun at Alice. Nathan didn't resist in any way, and he lowered his gun despite Ellie pointing her own at his mom.
"Get back! Get the fuck back!" she shouted, panting as she looked at Alice more angrily than ever. She had never quite trusted the lady, and there seemed to be a reason for it now. She knew Alice wasn't as nice as she seemed to be, and now they got confirmation.

The woman stared at Joel despite Ellie standing in between them. The anger showed on her face while Nathan slowly approached her.
"Mom, let's just go..."
"I hope I never see you again" she spat out before backing up and turning around. Nathan had another look at Joel, and then Ellie.
"I'm sorry" he whispered with a horrified look on his face. He didn't want to look at Joel no more, so he turned and followed his mother, forgetting to close the door behind him. Ellie stared at the door for the shortest while, then turning as she heard Joel moan from pain.
"Joel" she snapped back to reality, kneeling down next to him.
"Are you alright? Why didn't you do anything?" Ellie hurried to ask as she looked at his stomach and face. Joel squeezed his eyes shut for one more second before opening them a bit.
"I don't know..." he mumbled, moving his hands from his stomach while resting his head on the wooden floor. Ellie looked worried as she got closer to him.
"Let me see" she said quietly, laying her hands on his shirt, pulling it up a bit to see the stitches. The wound had not opened, but the pain must have been terrible. The kick looked hard, and it would most probably leave a bruise. Not that his body didn't look bad enough to start with. Joel would probably get one of those on his face, too.

"Is it bad?" Joel coughed, furrowing his brows while looking at the girl. He didn't see the wound from that position and with the shirt rolled up.
"It's alright, it-"

"Oh, shit! Run, Nathan! Run!"
They both turned to look at the door. Now what?
"Mom!"
"AAAAH!"
Ellie hesitated. She stared at the open door, then turning to see Joel. If it were for Alice, she'd say fuck it. But she didn't hate Nathan just yet.
"I'll check what's going on" she said to Joel, who lifted his hand in the air to grab her, but too late.
"Ellie"
"I won't do anything stupid" she shook her head, taking another look at Joel.
"Promise"

Before Joel had the chance to say anything else, Ellie had ran out the door and closed it after her. She saw instantly what was going on.
"NOOOO!" Nathan cried, and he was the first thing that came to Ellie's view.

The boy's eyes were as wide as plates as he stared towards the cabin they had stayed in. Ellie turned her eyes to the same direction, only to see a pack of runners.
"MOM!" Nathan shouted, running towards the pack. It was less than ten, but he definitely should not be running towards them.
"Nathan!" Ellie shouted, starting to run to his direction. She had no time to check the situation further, for she cocked her pistol and stopped to aim at the runners. A few of them altered their field of view, now looking at the approaching Nathan.
"Nathan, stop!" Ellie yelled again, firing a shot at the closest runner. She couldn't help if he ran straight towards them.

As Ellie took a better look at the rest of the pack, she noticed something. There was someone still fighting in the middle of them.
"Nathan!" a woman's voice called, and Ellie had to have a better look: it was Alice. Suddenly her arms came into Ellie's sight as she waved a knife in the middle of the pack.
"Mom!" Nathan cried again, lifting his gun again once he saw his mom was alive.
"Move, mom!" the boy shouted, firing a shot at one of the runners. There were still a few standing after Alice had brought down a couple and Ellie and Nathan had pierced two heads.

And Alice moved. She fought like hell to get away from the pack, and she made it. Ellie was ready to pierce another head with a bullet, and Nathan followed her example. Alice approached her son with her pathetic knife, but she seemed to have lost all of her other weapons.

After a masquerade of bullets and ear breaking noise, the last runner fell to the ground breathlessly. Ellie kept her gun pointed at it for a while before finally putting it down. After a few seconds of catching her breath, she turned to see the boy and her mother. Despite killing the whole pack, they didn't seem happy.
"Mom…" Nathan whispered, his eyes even wider than before. He was looking at his mother's neck.

As Ellie saw it, her face reacted to it. Alice was bitten.
"Nathan, I'm so sorry" she cried, dropping down to her knees as tears flooded from her eyes. She was panting like never before, unable to say anything else. Nathan wasn't crying, but he seemed devastated. Why wouldn't he be?
"Mom…" he whispered again. It seemed to be all he could say.
"Nathan, I…" Alice tried to speak, but the tears overflowed her. She started bawling as Nathan stared at her, then kneeling down in front of her. He grabbed her between his arms, putting his head against her shoulder.

Ellie couldn't help but stare at them. She pictured herself in the same situation, watching as Joel was bitten and done for. What the hell would she do after that?
"Nathan, I… I want you to be strong, okay?" Alice continued as soon as she could talk again. She sniffed while wiping away most of the tears from her face, then laying her hands to her son's cheeks. Alice lifted his chin to make his face meet her eyes, nodding a few times.
"I will watch over you. I know… I know you'll be alright" she got out before crying out her eyes again. Nathan wasn't crying. He just stared at his mom, sighing deeply before finally nodding.
"Yeah" he whispered, keeping on nodding. He couldn't stop it.
"Listen, honey. I… I'm sorry for everything. For all the…"
"It's okay" Nathan answered, cutting her off. That was the first actual sentence he had gotten out after the attack.

Then they both stayed quiet. Ellie had to turn her eyes away, reloading her gun while waiting for it to be over. If they wouldn't finish it, she would. She wasn't exactly sad for losing Alice, but she knew how much it hurt Nathan.

"I think you should…" Alice started, knowing that she should get going.
"I want to watch. Otherwise… otherwise I won't believe it" Nathan answered, even though it was not the answer Alice was hoping for. She fought back the tears while offering her hand to Nathan. He looked down at his hand. It was shaking. He held his gun tightly not to drop it while slowly offering it to his mother, only letting go once it met her hand. She looked into his eyes while grabbing the pistol, lifting it up to her temple.
"Goodbye, dear"

BLAM

Ellie turned just in time to see Alice collapse to the ground, Nathan's pistol dropping right next to her. To her astonishment, the boy didn't start bawling like a child after it happened. He stared at his mother with wide eyes, quietly.

Ellie swallowed while alternating her look between the two of them, thinking whether she should stay quiet or open a conversation. She was sure he wouldn't.
"Nathan" she whispered, taking a step closer. The boy inhaled deeply before turning a bit.
"Grab your gun. Let's get inside"