Sleepovers were never quite a norm for Tobio. He didn't have many friends growing up and those he did have only saw him for volleyball practice. So the childhood tradition and practice of going to a friend's house for the night was mainly confined to training camps.
Which he was fine with. Usually.
He boards the Karasuno bus, the noon sun hot on his neck; his bag light on his shoulders and a tight bundle of stress in his gut. It's been like that since he left home and Tobio, for the life of him, can't figure out why.
There's nothing so important that he needs and if he forgot something, he'll be home in four days. It's just three nights away with his team and Shouyou will be by his side the whole time.
The fiery-haired spiker plops down beside him, energetic enthusiasm like a powerful aura.
"I can't wait to start playing! I know we'll beat Kenma this time. Ohh! And I'll practice against Lev and Yaku! I wanna be there already!"
Tobio nods, the bundle of nerves loosening just a touch as the bus starts its journey. Nationals are coming up soon and they need all the practice they can get before they go. Shouyou is as ready and determined as ever and it's never failed to put Tobio at ease.
He doesn't think too hard about why it's always Shou that calms him down and excites him, all the same. He just knows his spiker and he chalks it up to them having a strong relationship. That's it.
And if he sometimes dreams of them together, limbs intertwined as he claims his tender lips over and over again, he wakes up and moves on with his day.
"Kageyama?"
Tobio startles and looks at Shou. "What?"
"Are you okay? You look kinda pale."
Tobio frowns and puts a hand to his cheek: normal. He feels fine except for the tight coil around his stomach, constricting him like a tangled blan-
oh no
Tobio frantically opens his bag and tears through it, only to confirm his worst fear. He groans to himself, understanding why it was so suspiciously light when he left the house.
"Did you forget something?"
Tobio slaps his forehead, his limbs running cold at his utter stupidity. "Yeah. I forgot something," he spits, internally cursing himself.
"What was it? If it's clothes, you can borrow mine, or maybe someone else can loan you some!"
"No, I forgot my weighted blanket. No one else has one."
Shou frowns, a mini smirk on his lips. "You sleep with a blankie?"
"It's not a blankie, dumbass, it's a weighted blanket. I need it to sleep."
Shou's smirk disappears as his eyes widen. "You can't sleep without it?"
Tobio shrugs. "I haven't tried to in the last year, so I don't know. I guess I'll find out tonight."
"I'm sure it'll be alright, Kageyama! We can play a bunch extra and you'll be so tired that you'll fall asleep right then and there! Blanket or no blanket."
"I won't get tired! I'll set until morning!" He proclaims to the stamina monster beside him.
Shou's eyes light up with that familiar competitiveness. "I'll spike 'till morning!"
They continue arguing about nothing for a while until the bus reaches Nekoma. Tobio's stomach barely lets up throughout, but he does his best to ignore it.
It's just three nights without the familiar, comforting weight. He'll be fine.
He spent the night awfully
The room was too warm, the sheets were itchy, and every time he tossed and turned, a new nagging thought arose. By dawn, he barely managed to get any consistent sleep.
He ate his breakfast slowly, the nauseous pit in his stomach from yesterday only having grown roots.
"King, you look awful," Tsukishima unhelpfully comments.
"Fuck off." Tobio slurs, his mind functioning more slowly than usual and unable to make any witty comeback.
"Be nice, Kageyama," Suga chides, sliding into the seat next to him as Tsukki walks off, content. "Are you alright?" The third-year setter asks.
Tobio brushes his bangs away from his eyes. "Didn't sleep well."
"I heard, your futon was close to mine."
"Sorry."
"It's okay, don't worry! If it's a migraine, I always have medication with me if that might help. I also have other pain relief meds, just in case. Would any of that help you?"
Tobio shakes his head. "I forgot my weighted blanket at home. It's fine. Thank you, though."
A look of recognition comes over Suga's eyes. "If it's anxiety, Asahi has relaxation techniques that work for him! I'm sure he can help you fall asleep."
"Suga-san, I can't do that."
He frowns. "Do what?"
Tobio stares into his plate of barely eaten food, the memories of his worst nights all too fresh and cutting. "It's worse if I sleep."
Suga tilts his head, seemingly understanding. He places a hand on Tobio's shoulder, his soft digits pressing into his skin. "If you need anything, please let me know. Try to take it easy today, okay?"
Tobio nods, the pressure of his fingers doing little to offset the heavy cloud in his mind and jagged knives in his abdomen.
To say he played poorly is a kind folktale.
Tobio had periodical moments of decent and accurate play but all of them were quickly followed by fractional misses and clumsy steps. To any normal watcher, one might guess he was having an off day.
But Tobio Kageyama does not have off days. Not when it comes to volleyball.
The slightest misstep and the minute error in his precise sets tell the team everything they need to know about his condition. He swaps out with Suga a few times, allowing him to rest and gain a grip on his wild mind and exhausted limbs.
He catches Shouyou looking at him more times than he can keep track of, and there's always this extra something in his eyes. He's always had this energy, this commitment in his gaze, the knowledge that Tobio will meet him and push him forward. But now, he just looks at him like he… cares?
The day passes and unsurprisingly, Karasuno wins no games. Every player has a good moment in their own right against Nekoma, but collectively, they can't pull it together.
Through dinner and baths, the heaviness in Tobio's mind refuses to yield. He can't seem to focus on anything and when he pushes himself to try and awaken out of this state, he's attacked with too many thoughts, all of them unfriendly and far too personal.
The team sets up the futons, everyone making conversation as the starting setter makes his bed to the best of his ability.
His limbs feel heavy as the lights go off, he climbs into his covers and collapses. His mind simultaneously races and holds still.
"Night, Kageyama," Shou calls from the futon next to his.
Tobio turns to lock eyes with his spiker and the attentive look on his face. "Night, Hinata."
He feels his body struggle to relax and he takes several deep breaths. He just wants some goddamn sleep.
Please don't let it be one of those nights. Please
He drifts to sleep with this plea on his tongue, the spiker's eyes on him until he finally falls.
He's running as fast as he can his team all left they wouldn't spike his set they call him king it's an ugly word for him no one is there Miwa's never home the only one who was there left you left how could you think I'd be okay without you everything hurts everything always hurts I don't want to keep going I want to cry until I can't breathe I don't deserve to breathe I can't do this anymore I
"Kageyama, wake up!" Shouyou yell-whispers, shaking the setter by the shoulders.
He shudders awake, eyes defocusing and breathing unsteady. His skin feels hot and itchy, uncomfortable.
"Hey, hey, look at me," Shou whispers, gripping his shoulders tightly, demanding his attention.
Tobio's gaze focuses on the spiker hovering over him. Shou's hair is wild and unkempt and there's a concerned frown on his brow.
"Hinata?"
"You were making noises in your sleep. Are you okay?"
no
"I'm fine, just a weird dream," he says, rubbing his eyes.
Shou quirks a brow in disbelief.
"Thanks for waking me, but I'm fine. Just go back to your bed."
"No."
"No? What do you mean, no?"
Shou stares into his setter's eyes, his gaze growing more determined by the second. "I don't want to go back to my own bed. I won't leave you like this."
Tobio clicks his tongue. "Hinata, there's nothing you can do. I guess I do need the blanket. Figures."
Shou is silent for a moment before his lips part as an idea forms. "What if… that were me?"
"Huh?"
"What if I were your blanket?"
Even on a good day, Tobio would've been confused. Now, Shou's idea is like deciphering Italian.
"You… what?"
Shou sighs. "Can I show you?"
Tobio nods. He's not exactly the best authority on denying Hinata Shouyou and that's not stopping now.
Shou gingerly peels back Tobio's bunched-up blanket and sheet and pulls his limbs into the futon. He slides down until they are at about face level and then, Shou pulls himself to settle his weight and body on top of Tobio.
Shou adjusts himself slightly so that his head falls into the crook of his neck and his arms frame Tobio's waist, his legs slotting in between those of his setter.
Tobio's heart takes off like a rocket. Shou pulling himself on top of him is the absolute last thing he thought Shou would do and yet, he should have seen it coming from the daring boy.
Moreover, shock aside, Shou is really comfortable, his warmth and energy from everyday cools into a mellow, persistent coziness. His weight settles onto Tobio just how he likes it, as if he's receiving a hug-
Oh.
Shouyou is hugging him.
Gently, pulling his waist and torso in and breathing into the skin of his neck. The spiker holds onto him, kindly, determinedly, and sweetly.
Tobio feels his body relax as Shou rubs circles into his sides, his hair tickling his chin. The weight reminds him of the blanket, but with the added care and reassurance that Shou has always freely given to Tobio.
I don't deserve it...
"Kageyama?"
Tobio blinks and looks down a touch, meeting Shou's close eyes. "Yeah?"
"Is this okay?"
Tobio's expression softens at the cautious vulnerability in his voice. The setter pulls his arms up to wrap around Shou's body, one hand resting on his back while the other threads through his hair.
Shou relaxes against his gentle touch, the usual force that Tobio grabs his hair with long forgotten in place of something distinctly tender.
He nestles back into Tobio's neck, resting against the warm skin of his collarbone. He is more comfortable here than he thought he'd be; when he woke up and heard his setter whimpering and thrashing, Shouyou knew he couldn't stand by and let his friend and partner suffer.
What he didn't expect was how right it feels to be in his intimate space, having his smooth skin under his fingertips and listening to his heart rate mellow and speed for every beat.
He's more comfortable than he ever thought he'd be and he almost falls asleep with it when he feels an odd pressure on the top of his head, a quick pinprick against his scalp.
"Thank you, Hinata."
Shou grins against Tobio's neck.
"Go to sleep, Kageyama," he whispers, nuzzling into his skin and loving the way Tobio tightens his hold.
Shou swivels his neck to look at his setter: Tobio looks calm, his usual frown softly fading away and a gentle smile on his lips.
Shou leans in, closer to his ear, and says: "and in the morning, you should kiss me like you mean it."
Tobio fully smiles, a sweet stretching of his lips that pulls at his cheeks. He ruffles Shou's hair, thumbing lightly at the strands.
Shou nestles back onto his neck and falls asleep almost immediately, the comfort of his setter too overpowering.
Tobio has never been the best with physical affection. He didn't have many friends and his family grew apart from him. His grandfather suggested the weighted blanket for him to sleep well, and to start to experience the comfort of weight and how it could feel to hug, cuddle, and just be with someone.
It worked to keep most of his nightmares away and when he was numb, it helped him feel.
But now, as he falls asleep with Shouyou laying on him, softly holding onto his body even as he slips into sleep, he thinks to himself that he can never go back to the blanket after this.
Not when Hinata Shouyou is everything he's ever needed and more.