"Ya mas!"
"Ya mas!" Newlyweds Hercules and Megara clinked their glasses of fresh, freezing Savatiano. Life was all good in the villa on the hilla. Hercules had just defeated a whole slew of monsters - saved Thebes from Typhon, Echidna and Orthrus - and the grateful Thebians were coming up soon to party.
"Well Wonderboy, you did it again." Meg skimmed off the top of her drink. She gestured to their Pantheon-style mansion. "Are you sure you wanna give up all this for Olympus?" She said the word with long, drawn-out disgust.
"As much as it pains me to say it… my place is here." Hercules played along like he was in a dramatic epic and flopped onto the couch with zest. He set his glass down and crawled over. Guests wouldn't arrive for a good twenty minutes yet - the house was ready, and when it came down to just the two of them, alone in that great big house, there was kissing. Lots of kissing.
During said kissing, Meg's wrap rode down. Hercules pulled it off and -
"Whoa!" he recoiled. He almost fell off the couch. Staring up at him was the giant, pulsating purple of a bruise on her shoulder.
"Wha… " Meg followed his eyes, then snickered softly. "Oh. That's nothing."
"What do you mean that's nothing," Hercules said. "Who gave that to you?"
"Nobody." Meg pulled the wrap back onto her shoulders. "Freezing in here… "
"Wait, lemme see that - "
"No - "
"Give it - " Removing the wrap, Hercules gasped when he found another horrible bruise on the crook of Meg's elbow - this one tinged with gold like a Grecian sun. "Holy Hera, Meg! How did you get that one?"
"Calm down, psycho," she said in an almost bored lilt.
"No, my wife has a bruise. I wanna know how you got it."
"It's really no big deal."
"How is it no big deal? Did you fall?"
Meg rolled her eyes, taking a long swig of her drink. "Noooo," she said, setting it down.
"What is it then?" Hercules was ready to fight. "Who did it? I'll kill them, I swear."
"Oh? Do you swear by the River Styx?"
"Well… no," Hercules admitted. As the town hero, he still had to abide by a code of ethics. "But I'll seriously give them a good talking to. Now who gave you those bruises!"
Meg gave him a sidelong glance. "You actually did," she said.
. . .